Date   : 04/07/2005    Duedate: 04/20/2005


DM-56    TURN-374

This Weeks Top Honors


(56-3795) [10-3-0,109]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

MACHINE                        ZIPPER
(56-3795) [10-3-0,109]         (56-3111) [5-0-1,51]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

MECHANISM                      GLASS JOE
TOOLS OF TORMENT (407)         PUNCH-OUT! (411)
(56-3796) [9-4-1,98]           (56-3847) [7-4-0,79]



Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. RESCUE RANGERS (338)        37
2. REDHORSE (207)              26      PUNCH-OUT! (411)
3. TOOLS OF TORMENT (407)      12      Unchartered Team
4. BAD APPLES (187)             5
5. BLACKENED PRIDE (409)        0      RESCUE RANGERS (338)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 1*RESCUE RANGERS (338)      19   6  2 76.0   1/ 1*RESCUE RANGERS (338)      8  3 0
 2/ 2 PUNCH-OUT! (411)          33  16  5 67.3   2/ 2 REDHORSE (207)            8  7 0
 3/ 4 TOOLS OF TORMENT (407)    21  12  1 63.6   3/ 4 TOOLS OF TORMENT (407)    5  1 0
 4- 5*BLACKENED PRIDE (409)      4   3  0 57.1   4/ 3 BAD APPLES (187)          5 10 0
 5/ 6 REDHORSE (207)           404 463 14 46.6   5/ 6 PUNCH-OUT! (411)          2  2 0
 6/ 7 BAD APPLES (187)         348 473 14 42.4   6- 7*BLACKENED PRIDE (409)     0  1 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                      SPY REPORT

     Like the magnificent Sun, rising upon the Dawn and exiling the Night for a Day, 
I, Novgorodny Vir, return once again!  Practice pays for CHIP, who pummelled ROTTEN 
CORE, to pocket 20 points.  PRONGHRON certainly had a baffled expression on hers 
face, after losing to ZIPPER and losing 15 points in the process!  Well, Duelmaster 
MACHINE challenged REDHORSE's HEDGEHOG.  Is a 9-3-0 good enough?  Those who hoped for 
a new Duelmaster were disappointed by HEDGEHOG, of REDHORSE, who despite a 19-25-0 
couldn't overcome ROCANIS' Number 1.  So who's the team that's been walking into 
taverns last week and ordering milk?  Sounds like a PR stunt to me.   
     And how sociable are ROCANIS' warriors?  Come, let us see.  To quell some nasty 
rumors, the guys in ARNIE'S ARMY are not carrying any incurable diseases.  No need to 
avoid 'em.  As a woman of good breeding scorns the "warriors" of RESCUE RANGERS, so 
did that sorry team shy from ARNIE'S ARMY If challenges were horses, HEDGEHOG could 
open up a fast food joint!  As a confidence booster, MECHANISM challenged BITTER 
VETCH, down 20 points.  Do you also slay vicious rodents in your spare time, 
MECHANISM?  MECHANISM bested BITTER VETCH.  The whole thing leaves a bitter memory.   
     Ah, the duel!  The roar of the oppenent, the smell of the crowd!  Ask not for 
whom the sword slashes; it slashes for thee.   
     Do not think spyreporting in ROCANIS is the highlight of my life.  As if 
buffeted by forces of nature beyond my control, I must take my leave of this place.  
Can anything compare to the pleasure of writing Spyreports for ROCANIS?  On that 
giddy note I take my leave-- Novgorodny Vir  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 MACHINE 3795                 10   3  0   109       TOOLS OF TORMENT (407)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 MECHANISM 3796                9   4  1    98       TOOLS OF TORMENT (407)
 HEDGEHOG 3748                19  25  0    91       REDHORSE (207)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 GLASS JOE 3847                7   4  0    79       PUNCH-OUT! (411)
 SHANKS PONY 3854              7   4  0    75       REDHORSE (207)
 BITTER VETCH 3762            18  19  0    73       BAD APPLES (187)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-BALD BULL 3843                8   1  1    58       PUNCH-OUT! (411)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 KID QUICK 3846                8   3  2    53       PUNCH-OUT! (411)
 ZIPPER 3111                   5   0  1    51       RESCUE RANGERS (338)
 EATS GRASS 3853               5   6  0    41       REDHORSE (207)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 GODGET 3110                   4   1  0    32       RESCUE RANGERS (338)
 DALE 3112                     4   1  0    32       RESCUE RANGERS (338)
 PRONGHRON 3852                6   5  0    31       REDHORSE (207)
 CHIP 3114                     3   2  1    31       RESCUE RANGERS (338)
 PRIVET 3867                   5   2  0    28       BAD APPLES (187)
 YUL 3868                      3   3  0    26       REDHORSE (207)
-CIRITH UNGOL 3842             3   2  0    25       BLACKENED PRIDE (409)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-KING HIPPO 3845               6   3  1    22       PUNCH-OUT! (411)
 LARGE DOG 3848                4  10  0    22       BAD APPLES (187)
-MR. SANDMAN 3844              4   5  1    18       PUNCH-OUT! (411)
 ROTTEN CORE 3851              3   9  0    18       BAD APPLES (187)
 MONTY 3113                    3   2  0    15       RESCUE RANGERS (338)
 PIEFACE 3875                  1   3  0    14       BAD APPLES (187)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
CANDY APPLE 3786      10 18 0 BAD APPLES 187        KID QUICK 3846        370 NOT REVE

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Mechanism -- Yep, you're a tool of torment, all right.  I feel highly tormented.
Hope that satisfies you, because it doesn't do a THING for me. -- Bitter Vetch

Pronghorn -- Ah, very convenient, as I have some stuff to hang up to dry.  Your horns
will do splendidly, especially with the prongs to keep the rope from slipping. --

Eats Grass -- I prefer meat. -- Large Dog

Yul -- I hope you get split ends all over your head! -- Rotten Core

Dale -- Bah. -- Pieface

Machine -- Thank you for taking the title away.  I know I didn't write a column last
turn and maybe a couple turns before, but that was my manager's fault.  I would have
had to write one if I had won our fight. -- Hedgehog

Well, I beat three stand-ins at once.  But the Rirorni Soldiers aren't very tough,
especially after all these years. -- Shanks Pony

Privet -- Those ankle hits are hard to take.  But I'm sorry about the houseplant
remark. -- Pronghorn

Large Dog -- Oops, I scummed you.  Sorry. -- Eats Grass

Privet -- No, I like it (steamed, with lemon juice, olive oil, and some unsalted
sunflower seeds). -- Eats Grass

Rotten Core -- You are aptly named.  You didn't even teach me anything. -- Yul
P.S.  And you did not have to bite.  Barking is adequate.

28 March 2005
Is there anybody in the DM game who is incarcerated that has had to litigate in order
to continue playing?  Or anyone in the free world who may be able to help me with
case law or legal advice?  The Administration has already taken "D&D type games" from
us once (though I recently had that decision overturned).  I believe it's only a
matter of time before they try it again and I am prepared to file a lawsuit if need
be.  I enjoy DM and any help that could be offered would be greatly appreciated!  I
can be contacted at:
     Danny Warren
     P.O. Box 250 
     Draper, UT  84070
     Heathen, mgr. Misnomers DM 47

28 March 2005
Ladies and gents...get your teams together and join in on the hottest and fiercest
contest ever to grace the arena sands!  Intrigue, personal wars, you name it...we got
it going on!  What is this contest?  It's the Turf War IV in DM 47, North Fork!!
This fantastic contest was begun by my alliance mate Asmo Dius, and I've picked up
some of the slack.  Contest starts on Turn 225 (approx. date June 9th?).  It's an
"alliance-type contest", so grab your folks and bring them in for a bang up time.
Rules will be printed in the DM 47 newsletter at least until the contest starts. --
Baphomet, Host...Company of Brothers Alliance, Illuminati Confederation of Alliances

28 March 2005
Contest Announcement
It's finally here!  ScumFest 2005!  The greatest scum in the land of Alastari are
formally invited to participate in ScumFest 2005, a contest involving the scummiest
scum in all of Alastari!

Who:  All Scum in Alastari
What:  Scum Fest 2005!
Where:  Talahya
When:  May 23rd, Talahya Turns 490-499

The object of winning ScumFest is to have the longest cumulative time (in minutes) at
the end of the 10th round.

Should there be a tie at the end of 10 rounds, tiebreakers are (in order):
- Head to Head Record
- Win/Loss Percentage
- Average Fight Length
(We'll go into overtime if they're still tied)

There are no other rules.  A manager may use any means at his disposal in order to
accomplish his goal.  Collusion, hiring Aimed Blows to take out the leaders, etc.
Anything goes!

To enter the scum fest, please write a personal ad in the DM 100 newsletter,
declaring your intention to join the contest, or send an email to managerr@aol.com

Please include warrior name and ID numbers of the contestants.  You may enter the
competition up until Turn 494.

Prizes will be announced after the competition begins.  The point of the contest is
to prove you have the scummiest scum, and necessarily for a silly prize.

Good luck and Happy Scumming!

-- Manager

6 April 2005
                                SLAUGHTER'S CHALLENGE

     I would like to make a formal announcement to all the managers of Alastari that
the inaugural/memorial challenge put forth by Abarsis, The Slaughter Priest (Richard
Hammes) has been approved by the commission.  The contest will be held in TROCAR,
arena 54, beginning on the turn that starts around June 2nd.  Keep in mind that this
is a slow arena.  Before I go on, I would like to personally thank the commission for
procuring an outstanding top prize for this contest.  This announcement follows my
last and entry into the contest will be a minimum $5 donation, which I will pool and
give to a charity in the San Diego area in Richard Hammes' name and memory.  My
address is at the end.  Once the donation is made, I intend to notify RSI of the
charity and amount we donated as a matter of pride for them and us in this game!  I
will notify everyone in an all arena ad as well.
     The contest is pretty simple.  Any team may enter, there are no restrictions on
fight experience!  There are no challenges, avoids, bloodfeuds, or tourneys allowed
and only one single use of the Dark Arena is allowed after the contest begins.  To
help eliminate any interference, I am going to allow avoids of non-contest teams in
case they are there to manipulate and affect the winner of the contest.  Scoring is
as follows:

1 point for winning
1 point for killing (giving 2 in total, 1 for the win and 1 for the kill)
1 point for at least one of your warriors writing a personal (regardless of number of
     personals beyond one you still only get one point).  Make sure it is written
     from one of your team's warriors and not simply the manager entity or you will
     not get the point.
-1 point for losing
-1 point for being killed (giving -2 in total, -1 for losing and -1 for being killed)

     The contest will last for 12 turns, again beginning roughly June 2nd.  May I
point out that if you use your Dark Arena fight you will get either 2 points, for
winning, or -2, for losing, and ALL fights count in the scoring.  It matters not if
you fight a non-contest warrior or a stand-in; they still count as much as fighting a
contest warrior.  This will be a test of basic strategy with a touch of luck added in
as well.
     If anyone should break the no tourney rule they will lose 5 points for each
warrior entered and those warriors, and any subsequent warriors who replace them in
death, cannot score points!  Break the no DA, challenge, or avoid rules (except
avoids of non-contest teams) and you will be DQ'd as soon as the transgression is
discovered.  To keep the contest playing field as level as possible, we will have no
messing with these rules.  Of course you may DA the one time, just as a
clarification, but the second time gets you DQ'd.  This also counts if it is found
you bring a second team in for the purpose of making challenges.  You can bring a
second team, just don't think they can challenge to give you an advantage.  This
means DQ to your contest team.  A second team may also enter the contest with its own
donation of $5 and adherence to the rules.  Well, enough of that, I'm sure you'd like
to see the prizes so here they are:

1st place - +1 bonus to one warrior on the team, 1 resurrection potion, and 1
     favorite knowledge
2nd place - +1 bonus for one warrior, 1 favorites knowledge
3rd place- +1 bonus for one warrior
Iron Manager - Run 54 of the possible 60 fights and get a +1 bonus potion

     The resurrection potion may be used on any FE warrior, however the favorites and
+1 bonus potions must be used on a warrior with at least 5 FE.  These prizes also
must be used within 2 turns of the ending of the contest.  Even those rookie level
teams can figure out a way to use that resurrection potion if you think night fight
;), after the contest of course, so don't think this is only good for experienced
teams!  Check your rosters and unused RU's and see if you can't find a reason to come
and test your mettle!
     Again, entry fee is a minimum $5 donation, money order preferred method but if
that doesn't work for you we can figure alternate means.  If a hopeful entrant
happens to be incarcerated and the only real means of making the donation is an
account transfer, please make sure you let me know where the transfer came from and
which team it is for.  I prefer that this only be used as donation method by
incarcerated players unless otherwise discussed with me.  Please drop me an email, or
diplo my team in Tobir(14), letting me know you are sending a donation for entry and
the amount so I can be on the lookout for it in the mail.  Thanks to all who have
sent their sympathies regarding our game's loss of a kind and admirable soul and my
best wishes to all!

Street Legal
Jeff Bura
193 Pepperidge Dr.
Wixom, MI 48393
THE DEATH SQUAD (63) in Tobir, arena 14

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

MACHINE viciously subdued HEDGEHOG in a crowd pleasing 3 minute Challenge Title fight.
MECHANISM demolished BITTER VETCH in a popular 1 minute one-sided Challenge melee.
GLASS JOE viciously subdued RIRORNI ASSASSIN in a popular 3 minute gory contest.
KID QUICK was demolished by SHANKS PONY in a 1 minute mismatched competition.
PRONGHRON was vanquished by ZIPPER in a 1 minute mismatched fight.
GODGET was beaten by EATS GRASS in a crowd pleasing 3 minute brawl.
ROTTEN CORE was overpowered by CHIP in a 1 minute uneven melee.
MONTY was vanquished by YUL in a 1 minute uneven duel.
DALE overpowered LARGE DOG in a 1 minute uneven duel.
PRIVET overpowered TROCARAN DESERTER in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
PIEFACE handily defeated RIRORNI ARCHER in a 1 minute one-sided bout.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                   7         PARRY-STRIKE       5 -   2 -  0      71  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   3         SLASHING ATTACK   12 -   5 -  1      71  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  2         LUNGING ATTACK    38 -  21 -  2      64  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      2         STRIKING ATTACK   11 -   7 -  0      61  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     1         TOTAL PARRY       13 -  10 -  0      57  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  1         BASHING ATTACK     7 -   6 -  0      54  |
|AIMED BLOW                       1         PARRY-LUNGE        6 -  12 -  0      33  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      1         PARRY-RIPOSTE      3 -   8 -  0      27  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    1         AIMED BLOW         1 -  10 -  0       9  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    0         WALL OF STEEL      0 -   6 -  0       0  |

Turn 374 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-STRIKE       1 -  0     AIMED BLOW         0 -  1         5  LUNGING ATTACK 
SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  0     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  1         2  TOTAL PARRY    
STRIKING ATTACK    2 -  0     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  1         2  SLASHING ATTACK
BASHING ATTACK     2 -  1     WALL OF STEEL      0 -  0         1  STRIKING ATTACK
LUNGING ATTACK     4 -  3                                       1  AIMED BLOW     
TOTAL PARRY        1 -  1     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
LUNGING ATTACK   MACHINE 3795               10   3  0  109 TOOLS OF TORMENT (407)
STRIKING ATTACK  SHANKS PONY 3854            7   4  0   75 REDHORSE (207)
SLASHING ATTACK  ZIPPER 3111                 5   0  1   51 RESCUE RANGERS (338)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is MECHANISM 3796.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was GLASS JOE 3847.  The ten other most popular fighters were MACHINE 3795, GODGET 
3110, MECHANISM 3796, YUL 3868, SHANKS PONY 3854, CHIP 3114, DALE 3112, PRIVET 3867, 

The least popular fighter this week was LARGE DOG 3848.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were MONTY 3113, ROTTEN CORE 3851, PRONGHRON 3852, KID QUICK 3846, PIEFACE 
3875, EATS GRASS 3853, ZIPPER 3111, BITTER VETCH 3762, HEDGEHOG 3748, and PRIVET 


Summer Face-to-Face Tournament XXXV in St. Louis!  
Our next summer FTF will be held in downtown St. Louis, July 29-31, 2005.  It will be 
at the Radisson Hotel & Suites, St. Louis (800-925-1395--ask for the Reality 
Simulations room block). Room rates are $99.00 per night, 1-4 occupancy.  The rooms 
are blocked--please make your reservation by mid-June before the block is released! 
Look for transportation info in the tournament information sheet.  See you there!

Winter Face-to-Face Tournament XXXVI in Tempe!
Our next winter FTF will be held in Tempe, Arizona, January 20-22, 2006.  It will be 
held at the Embassy Suites Hotel in Tempe, Arizona (480-894-7444), the same hotel as 
last year by popular request.  Room rates are $139.00 per night (same as last year!), 
1-4 occupancy, which includes full cooked breakfast, complimentary manager's 
reception, free airport shuttle, free parking, high speed internet (for extra charge), 
fitness center, jacuzzi, and pool.  The rooms are blocked--please make your 
reservation soon before the block is released!  (This is prime season for Phoenix, and
several people were unable to book rooms last year because they waited too long.)  
Look for transportation info in the tournament information sheet.  We hope you're all 
looking forward to it and that we will see you there!