DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER

Date   : 05/27/2011    Duedate: 06/23/2011

ILLIS ARENA

DM-59    TURN-261

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

G W BUSH
TALL TALES (305)
(59-2764) [11-5-1,104]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

G W BUSH                       POSITION IS EMPTY
TALL TALES (305)               
(59-2764) [11-5-1,104]         

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

I'M POWERLESS                  SUDDEN DEATH
BASHAHOLICS ANON (297)         WHAT'S IN A NAME (68)
(59-2629) [20-34-0,99]         (59-361) [8-5-0,61]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

TALL TALES (305)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. WHAT'S IN A NAME (68)       39
2. TALL TALES (305)            38      WHAT'S IN A NAME (68)
3. BASHAHOLICS ANON (297)       4      Unchartered Team
4. IMPROVED ILLUSION (261)      0
5. ISLANDERS (247)             -1      LITTLE ITALY (274)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 0 WHAT'S IN A NAME (68)     42  20  3 67.7   1/ 1 TALL TALES (305)          8  7 0
 2/ 1 TALL TALES (305)          53  26  1 67.1   2/ 2 BASHAHOLICS ANON (297)    7  6 0
 3- 2 IMPROVED ILLUSION (261)  141  71  9 66.5   3- 3 IMPROVED ILLUSION (261)   5  0 0
 4/ 3 BASHAHOLICS ANON (297)    63  68  1 48.1   4/ 4 ISLANDERS (247)           5 10 0
 5/ 4 ISLANDERS (247)          342 441 12 43.7   5/ 0 WHAT'S IN A NAME (68)     2  1 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

       * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                              ---===SLOW ARENA NEWS===---

                                     Duelmasters
                                     -----------
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 335): ZITHER of Z GLADIATORS (Z-Man, mgr.)
 DM  28 MORYA (turn 332): RENTAL CAR of EXPENSE ACCOUNT (Finance Manager, mgr.)
 DM  31 CHIMLEVTAL (turn 330): OMBERT QURL of MIDDLE WAY 7 (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 285): TIMOR UNRED of THE MIDDLE WAY (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 308): JOSIE WALES of STREET WALKERS (Roadkill, mgr.)
 DM  47 TEMPLE OF ABARSIS (turn 302): ACE OF BASE of ROYAL FLUSH (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  50 SNOWBOUND (turn 289): DURANGO KID of LIFE IMPACTS (Smitty, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 283): ONYX of DRAGONS GUARD II (Khisanth, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 267): ALBERT of KIWI CONNECTION (The Mun, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 260): FAIRYFIRE of IMPROVED ILLUSION (Master Darque, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 236): GEROGE IGONO of THE ZOO (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 237): WHOLE of MILK IS GOOD (Assurnasirbanipal, mgr.)
 DM  73 ERINIKA (turn 236): MRS POTATOE HEAD of DREW'S BOYS II (The Mun, mgr.)
 DM  83 TELORINTHE (turn 52): ACCORDION of OLDIES (Coach, mgr.)
 DM 106 CRYSALIS (turn 235): DUTCH TREAT of WORLDWIDE GORE (Crip, mgr.)

                                      Top Teams
                                      ---------
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 335): SMITHSONIAN (Curator, mgr.)
 DM  28 MORYA (turn 332): SONS OF MARS (Mars, mgr.)
 DM  31 CHIMLEVTAL (turn 330): AVENGERS (Huckle Cat?, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 285): THE MIDDLE WAY (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 308): STREET WALKERS (Roadkill, mgr.)
 DM  47 TEMPLE OF ABARSIS (turn 302): ALASKAN PIPELINE (Storm Lord, mgr.)
 DM  50 SNOWBOUND (turn 289): LIFE IMPACTS (Smitty, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 283): WAH CHING (Pec Killer, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 267): ASIAN INVASION (Pec Killer, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 260): TALL TALES (A-Sop, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 236): THE ZOO (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 237): MIDDLE WAY 9 (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  73 ERINIKA (turn 236): MIDDLE WAY 18 (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  83 TELORINTHE (turn 52): SUDDENLY, THE VAN (She Puppy, mgr.)
 DM 106 CRYSALIS (turn 235): CRYPTICS et al (Crip, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
                                   ----------------
 DM  28 MORYA (turn 332): RENTAL CAR of EXPENSE ACCOUNT (Finance Manager, mgr.)
                          VALERIAN of STEEL AND SILK (Michael Eldritch, mgr.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 307): CALLOUS CORTNEY of STREET WALKERS (Roadkill, mgr.)
                               PAYNE of DARQUE FORCES (Master Darque, mgr.)
 DM  47 TEMPLE OF ABARSIS (turn 302): PROWL of DARQUE FORCES (Master Darque, mgr.)
                                      EARVLING FLASH of FORCE OF WILL
                                                    (Michael Eldritch, mgr.)
                          (turn 301): SHELDON of ALL-STAR NANA'S (The Mun, mgr.)
                                      RERUN of SECOND BANANAS (Mannequin, mgr.)
                                      JACK KNIFE of ROYAL FLUSH (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  50 SNOWBOUND (turn 289): DURANGO KID of LIFE IMPACTS (Smitty, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 257): DENG FEI of ASIAN INVASION (Pec Killer, mgr.)
                           TIAN HU of ASIAN INVASION (Pec Killer, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 235): PANAMA OATS of THE ZOO (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  83 TELORINTHE (turn 51): ORRIE POLLAS of MIDDLE WAY 21 (Jorja, mgr.)

                                      SPY REPORT

     Well, what are you looking at, ILLIS?  Ain't you never seen Snide Clemens 
before?  Ah, shaddup and listen to my news.  Now let's all watch BASHAHOLICS ANON's 
heads swell from their 3-1-0 this turn.  Haa ha ha ha!  Big shots, big talk, big 
deal.  Of course, we're all terribly impressed to see BURNING RUBBER win a fight and 
gain 18 points, terribly.  Tsk, tsk, BURNING RUBBER beat UNCLE FESTER and UNCLE 
FESTER lost 13 points.  You're breakin' my heart.  Due to absence, and inability to 
defend the throne, FAIRYFIRE has lost the Title of Duelmaster.  Start setting that 
alarm earlier!  And it's out with the old, in with the new, as G W BUSH takes the 
Title and last week's bar tab from the old Duelmaster.  Heh, heh.  Kickbacks and 
bribes, kickbacks and bribes, how else do you think some of these guys win their 
fights?  Skill?  Ha!   
     My mother always told me, 'If you don't have anything nice to say, start 
talking.' I loved that woman.  IMPROVED ILLUSION, I suppose you'll be glad to know 
you were this turn's most avoided team.  Care to know who is the most afraid of you?  
And who led the way in this mass act of cowardice?  Let's see, well, whatcha know?  
It was BASHAHOLICS ANON.  Ha ha ha ha!  G W BUSH was challenged more times this turn 
than the Duelmaster.  Now was the DM insulted or feared?  Heh, heh.  I notice I'M A 
BASHER challenging down 26 points to fight G W BUSH, BASHAHOLICS ANON doubtless has 
some rotten excuse for such an insult to honor.  This is the sort of thing that makes 
the price of admission to ILLIS' games worth it!  I'M A BASHER was subdued by G W 
BUSH!!   
     Death and Taxes.  The less death I see, the more it taxes my patience.  Let's 
see if anyone's dead or dying.  Honor is like a chainmail shirt, it only shines 
through use.  Certain nameless cowards will doubtless rebuke me on this one.   
     I was about to buy a new quill pen the other day, but some fighter took it for 
an epee.  Forgive me for writing with a dagger.  Just wait 'till next time I show up 
here, I won't be so nice!  So nyaaah!  I see the crowds are getting restless, I must 
leave now-- Snide Clemens  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 G W BUSH 2764                11   5  1   104       TALL TALES (305)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-FAIRYFIRE 2660               13   1  1   118       IMPROVED ILLUSION (261)
 I'M POWERLESS 2629           20  34  0    99       BASHAHOLICS ANON (297)
 BURNING RUBBER 363           10   3  1    99       WHAT'S IN A NAME (68)
-HARVEY 2636                   9   1  0    95       IMPROVED ILLUSION (261)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 I'M A BASHER 2682            23  10  0    79       BASHAHOLICS ANON (297)
 KING MIDAS 2770               8   2  0    79       TALL TALES (305)
 UNCLE FESTER 2768            10   6  0    78       TALL TALES (305)
 DAMN I'M SEXY 362            10   3  0    74       WHAT'S IN A NAME (68)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SYLVESTER 2728               17  15  0    66       ISLANDERS (247)
 SUDDEN DEATH 361              8   5  0    61       WHAT'S IN A NAME (68)
-APPLESEED 2662                4   1  0    59       IMPROVED ILLUSION (261)
-ELMINSTER 2679                6   2  0    57       IMPROVED ILLUSION (261)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 DILLIS RHIN 2742              9  10  0    55       ISLANDERS (247)
 JOHNNY APPLESEED 2767        11   5  0    54       TALL TALES (305)
 BELITRIS 2737                 9  16  0    53       ISLANDERS (247)
 COCO NUTTAL 2741             11   9  0    51       ISLANDERS (247)
-INUYASHA 2683                 4   1  3    48       IMPROVED ILLUSION (261)
 JOHN WAYNE 2766              10   6  0    41       TALL TALES (305)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-SNAPPLE 364                   6   6  0    24       WHAT'S IN A NAME (68)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 THOSE I HURT 2778             2   0  0    21       BASHAHOLICS ANON (297)
 THERE IS A GOD 2779           2   0  0    21       BASHAHOLICS ANON (297)
 CHAGUA KORBIN 2760            3   8  0    19       ISLANDERS (247)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                W  L K TEAM NAME            SLAIN BY              TURN Revenge?

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Assur -- Speaking as someone who has had to do spy reports on "nothing happens," I
think that Vir did okay. -- Jorja
P.S.  He can't help being an ass.

We salute the tourney participants. -- Jorja and the Islanders

King Midas -- I guess it IS possible to buy success.  Bummer, I went and blew my
allowance on doughnuts. -- Dillis Rhin

Could we maybe just... KILL all these Kung-Fu Masters?  They're a menace. --
Sylvester

Appleseed -- It's all the cyanide in the seeds. -- Coco Nuttal

Elminster -- That is not an improvement. -- Belitris

Johnny Appleseed -- Yours have cyanide in them, too. -- Chagua Korbin

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

I'M A BASHER was devastated by G W BUSH in a 1 minute Challenge Title fight.
UNCLE FESTER was demolished by BURNING RUBBER in a 1 minute one-sided melee.
I'M POWERLESS defeated KING MIDAS in a crowd pleasing 1 minute mismatched duel.
DILLIS RHIN was overpowered by DAMN I'M SEXY in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
SYLVESTER viciously subdued SCRAWNY GEORGE in a 1 minute gory uneven brawl.
SUDDEN DEATH was unbelievably bested by JOHNNY APPLESEED in a 3 minute match.
COCO NUTTAL defeated SCRAWNY GEORGE in a 2 minute melee.
BELITRIS viciously subdued TITUS PULLO in a 1 minute gruesome duel.
CHAGUA KORBIN was vanquished by JOHN WAYNE in a 1 minute uneven fight.
THERE IS A GOD vanquished MORDANT DESERTER in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
THOSE I HURT overpowered MORDANT DESERTER in a 1 minute one-sided melee.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                   6         PARRY-LUNGE        7 -   3 -  0      70  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  3         TOTAL PARRY       12 -   6 -  0      67  |
|AIMED BLOW                       3         WALL OF STEEL      3 -   2 -  0      60  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  2         BASHING ATTACK    22 -  15 -  1      59  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   2         SLASHING ATTACK    5 -   4 -  0      56  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      1         STRIKING ATTACK   16 -  15 -  0      52  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      0         LUNGING ATTACK    19 -  19 -  0      50  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     0         AIMED BLOW        12 -  16 -  0      43  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    0         PARRY-STRIKE       0 -   1 -  0       0  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    0         PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -   0 -  0       0  |

Turn 261 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

STRIKING ATTACK    3 -  0     AIMED BLOW         1 -  2         3  STRIKING ATTACK
TOTAL PARRY        1 -  0     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  0         3  SLASHING ATTACK
LUNGING ATTACK     4 -  2     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  0         2  BASHING ATTACK 
SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  1     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  0         1  WALL OF STEEL  
BASHING ATTACK     1 -  1     WALL OF STEEL      0 -  0         1  AIMED BLOW     
                                                                1  LUNGING ATTACK 

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
STRIKING ATTACK  G W BUSH 2764              11   5  1  104 TALL TALES (305)

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
BASHING ATTACK   I'M A BASHER 2682          23  10  0   79 BASHAHOLICS ANON (297)
AIMED BLOW       KING MIDAS 2770             8   2  0   79 TALL TALES (305)
SLASHING ATTACK  UNCLE FESTER 2768          10   6  0   78 TALL TALES (305)
LUNGING ATTACK   SUDDEN DEATH 361            8   5  0   61 WHAT'S IN A NAME (68)
TOTAL PARRY      JOHNNY APPLESEED 2767      11   5  0   54 TALL TALES (305)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is I'M POWERLESS 2629.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was SUDDEN DEATH 361.  The ten other most popular fighters were G W BUSH 2764, 
I'M POWERLESS 2629, SYLVESTER 2728, COCO NUTTAL 2741, BELITRIS 2737, BURNING RUBBER 
363, DAMN I'M SEXY 362, JOHNNY APPLESEED 2767, JOHN WAYNE 2766, and THERE IS A GOD 
2779.

The least popular fighter this week was CHAGUA KORBIN 2760.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were UNCLE FESTER 2768, DILLIS RHIN 2742, KING MIDAS 2770, I'M A 
BASHER 2682, THOSE I HURT 2778, THERE IS A GOD 2779, JOHN WAYNE 2766, JOHNNY 
APPLESEED 2767, DAMN I'M SEXY 362, and BURNING RUBBER 363.