DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER

Date   : 03/11/2005    Duedate: 03/24/2005

ARADI ARENA

DM-60    TURN-359

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

RIFF
SWIFT CURRENT (468)
(60-6452) [14-6-3,138]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

RIFF                           POSITION IS EMPTY
SWIFT CURRENT (468)            
(60-6452) [14-6-3,138]         

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

DEMURRER                       IN PARI DELICTO
LEGALESE (449)                 LEGALESE (449)
(60-5828) [23-28-2,106]        (60-7283) [3-5-0,14]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

DEATH STUDS VII (301)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. SILENT WARRIORS (561)       43
2. VOUGEOOT (464)              31MY BRAIN ON CHLORINE (555)
3. DARQUE AGES (536)           28      Unchartered Team
4. MY BRAIN ON CHLORINE (555)  26
5. THE MISGUIDED (559)         19      SILENT WARRIORS (561)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 1 MY BRAIN ON CHLORI (555)  38  20  3 65.5   1/ 1 DEATH STUDS VII (301)     9  3 0
 2- 2 ELOQUENT KNIGHTS (518)   102  60  5 63.0   2/ 5 VOUGEOOT (464)            8  7 0
 3/ 0*SILENT WARRIORS (561)      3   2  0 60.0   3/ 4 4000 BLOWS (107)          7  6 0
 4- 3 CRAZY CREEPS (207)       475 399 15 54.3   4/ 3*THE MISGUIDED (559)       7  8 0
 5/ 4 DARQUE AGES (536)         44  37  5 54.3   5/ 9 LEGALESE (449)            5  4 0
 6/ 5 DEATH STUDS VII (301)    367 315  9 53.8   6/11 DARQUE AGES (536)         5  5 0
 7/ 6 NATURAL DISASTERS (159)  640 562 22 53.2   7/ 2 NATURAL DISASTERS (159)   5  7 0
 8/ 7 SWIFT CURRENT (468)       94  85  8 52.5   8/ 7*CHEER-O-KEE'S (557)       5 10 0
 9/11 VOUGEOOT (464)            28  29  2 49.1   9/13 MY BRAIN ON CHLORI (555)  4  5 0
10/ 8 4000 BLOWS (107)         572 637 27 47.3  10/10 SWIFT CURRENT (468)       4  6 0
11/ 0 THIEVES GUILD (396)      123 140  5 46.8  11/ 6 RED DOG GANG (476)        4 11 0
12/ 9*CHEER-O-KEE'S (557)       20  23  0 46.5  12/ 0*SILENT WARRIORS (561)     3  2 0
13/10*THE MISGUIDED (559)       11  13  0 45.8  13- 8 LOSERS (544)              3  2 0
14/12 JOKA MASHER! (283)       165 220  7 42.9  14/12 JOKA MASHER! (283)        2  1 0
15/13 LEGALESE (449)           103 139  3 42.6  15/16 RESCUE RANGERS (362)      1  1 0
16/15 RESCUE RANGERS (362)      10  14  0 41.7  16/ 0 THIEVES GUILD (396)       0  4 0
17-14 LOSERS (544)              36  53  2 40.4  17-14 ELOQUENT KNIGHTS (518)    0  4 0

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
18/16 RED DOG GANG (476)       281 442  4 38.9  18-15 CRAZY CREEPS (207)        0  3 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                          ---===ANDORIAN REGIONAL NEWS===---

                                     Duelmasters
                                     -----------
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 254): CHAOS WARRIOR of CHAMPIONS OF STEEL (Blackstorm, 
mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 509): PURPLE PANTHER of ANIMAL FARM (Mino, mgr.)
 DM  14 TOBIR (turn 509): I WET MY BED! of I BENT MY WOOKIE (The Muffin Man, 
mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 502): ANTHONY SCALIA of CONSPIRACY INC. (Damion, mgr.)
 DM  24 ZORPUNT (turn 498): STONEFISH of AUSSIE KILLERS (THawk, mgr.)
 DM  25 LYRATILAN (turn 498): TRIMOX of OSCO INTOXICATORS (Osco, mgr.)
 DM  26 CALEAM (turn 499): PINK of SEEING RED (Edge, mgr.)
 DM  30 IAYE (turn 491): ADMIRAL ISO of LENPROS (Lenpro, mgr.)
 DM  40 ZENSU (turn 460): BORIS KARLOFF of MEN OF 1,000 FACES (Mad Max, mgr.)
 DM  41 KATI-TEI (turn 453): GREW SOME GRUE of OLD SCHOOL (Otto X. 
Frothingslosh)
 DM  46 ARDIVENT (turn 445): KHORNE SHADOWSPAWN of RUBY DRAGONS (Talon Warsmith)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 201): BEXLEY of OHIO (Berylstar, mgr.)
 DM  60 ARADI (turn 358): THE-SHOCKER of DEATH STUDS VII (Death Stud, mgr.)
 DM  63 AMEN-TEI (turn 347): SELAUNAH of WAYFARERS (Leeta, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 156): THE SADMAN of THE FURIOUS FIVE (Generalissimo 
Puerco)
ADM 105 ANDORAK (turn 395): DEADPOOL of X-FORCE from TARRGIR (Talon Warsmith, 
mgr.)

                                      Top Teams
                                      ---------
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 254): ACID FIRE HAMMERZ (Hammer, mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 509): none
 DM  14 TOBIR (turn 509): THE DEATH SQUAD (Street Legal, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 502): THE POISON CLAN (Master Tazo, mgr.)
 DM  24 ZORPUNT (turn 498): KRILL CAVALRY (Leeta, mgr.)
 DM  25 LYRATILAN (turn 498): MADTOWN (Carnage, mgr.)
 DM  26 CALEAM (turn 499): HEADBANGERS (Sablon-O-Vlad, mgr.)
 DM  30 IAYE (turn 491): THE WARLOCKS (Malaquar, mgr.)
 DM  40 ZENSU (turn 460): MEN OF 1,000 FACES (Mad Max, mgr.)
 DM  41 KATI-TEI (turn 453): GLAD TO MEAT YOU (Alfredo Frothingslosh, mgr.)
 DM  46 ARDIVENT (turn 445): BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (Leeta, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 201): ASSASSIN NATION (Ghab, mgr.)
 DM  60 ARADI (turn 358): DEATH STUDS VII (Death Stud, mgr.)
 DM  63 AMEN-TEI (turn 347): WAYFARERS (Leeta, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 156): THE FURIOUS FIVE (Generalissimo Puerco, mgr.)
ADM 105 ANDORAK (turn 395): JUST CHILLIN (Mr. Freeze, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
                                   ----------------
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 253): L'ORC BLEU of LA PENTARCHIE (The Pentalque, mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 509): PURPLE PANTHER of ANIMAL FARM (Mino, mgr.)
                   (turn 508): STRONGBOW of ELFQUEST (Armalias, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 502): SNAKE CHARMER of KELLUMBO'S KIDS (Detective Kellumbo)
                           BLIND ILLUSION of MEDIEVAL CHAOS (Huckle Cat, mgr.)
 DM  40 ZENSU (turn 459): PISTON HURRICANE of AS FAR AS SIAM (Huckle Cat, mgr.)
 DM  41 KATI-TEI (turn 453): PORTERHOUSE ARREST of GLAD TO MEAT YOU (Alfredo
                             Frothingslosh, mgr.)
                             CHICKEN TIGHT JEANS of GLAD TO MEAT YOU (Alfredo
                             Frothingslosh, mgr.)
 DM  63 AMEN-TEI (turn 346): PASSER BY of WAYFARERS (Leeta, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 156): THE SADMAN of THE FURIOUS FIVE (Generalissimo 
Puerco)
                             WHIPSNADE of THE FURIOUS FIVE (Generalissimo 
Puerco)
                             DASKINOR of DARQUE FORCES (Master Darque, mgr.)

                                      SPY REPORT

     If you were disturbed from your beauty rest only to have to watch a bunch of 
ARADI brutes like you, you'd be grouchy, too.  If this keeps up, NATURAL DISASTERS, 
you'll have to shine swords instead of use them.  A drop of 5 in the rankings?  
DARQUE AGES turned their 3-2-0 turn into a 6th place rank in the listings this turn.  
Any better than this, and you get put on hit lists.  Gee, I'm impressed, a 4-1-0 is 
nice, but don't get cocky, VOUGEOOT, the Fates teach humility, and the Fates are 
proud.  ARADI saw the first turn for SILENT WARRIORS, a 3-2-0, and some teams are 
scared, others are too arrogant to notice.  Take note friends, take note.  Of course, 
we're all terribly impressed to see SHMAMY CROCKETT win a fight and gain 18 points, 
terribly.  Tsk, tsk, FLOOD beat ASSHE-MASTER and ASSHE-MASTER lost 13 points.  You're 
breakin' my heart.  And it's out with the old, in with the new, as RIFF takes the 
Title and last week's bar tab from the old Duelmaster.  Heh, heh.  I'm not in a very 
good mood today, but why am I telling you this?  You want to know what's new, don't 
you, ARADI?   
     He who fights and runs away will live to fight another day, the coward.  
VOUGEOOT, I suppose you'll be glad to know you were this turn's most avoided team.  
Care to know who is the most afraid of you?  And who led the way in this mass act of 
cowardice?  Let's see, well, whatcha know?  It was DEATH STUDS VII.  Ha ha ha ha!  
Ooh, I'm frightfully impressed, DEMURRER was this turn's most challenged warrior.  
Watch that ego swell, sports fans.  DOONEUSHMUN was challenged by one of DEATH STUDS 
VII's warriors this turn, with ANGRY SANTA having a lead of 22 points going into the 
fight.  Ha ha aha ha aha ha!!!  ANGRY SANTA was was overcame by by VOUGEOOT's 
warrior!  Thank the gods for big favors!  ha!  I suspect either a 21 will or a 21 ego 
on this one, but BRUSHFIRE has challenged up by 27 in an attempt against TYPHOON 
XXII.  But here's a pretty tale--BRUSHFIRE did lose the fight, but gained 1 worth of 
recognition.  Some long shots can pay off, I guess.   
     Ah, now we come to my favorite part, where we see all the guys who are dead and 
gone, and get to see if their team cared.  I could say I saw this coming, but so 
could anyone else.  Anyway, this turn it came.  DICHABOD's 4-7-0 has earned him the 
Dark Arena.  Titanium shields and bamboo daggers, guess what brave team is developing 
these kinds of weapons?   
     I was about to buy a new quill pen the other day, but some fighter took it for 
an epee.  Forgive me for writing with a dagger.  Well, I've had enough of this 
drivel, and I'm sure you have too.  Off like a dirty shirt of padded leather.  Glad 
to see the back of this place-- Snide Clemens  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 RIFF 6452                    14   6  3   138       SWIFT CURRENT (468)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 TYPHOON XXII 6827            22   4  1   114       DEATH STUDS VII (301)
 DEMURRER 5828                23  28  2   106       LEGALESE (449)
 THE-SHOCKER 6824             13  13  0    92       DEATH STUDS VII (301)
 LEO 6837                     10   3  0    92       DARQUE AGES (536)
 DOONEUSHMUN 5949             10   2  0    91       VOUGEOOT (464)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 WILDFIRE 6983                19  14  1    90       NATURAL DISASTERS (159)
 BRUSHFIRE 7168               14   9  0    86       NATURAL DISASTERS (159)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-SCRAG 6972                   10   7  0    83       LOSERS (544)
 ANGRY SANTA 6828             15  11  0    79       DEATH STUDS VII (301)
 PRETTY BOY 7091              15  14  0    70       RED DOG GANG (476)
 SON OF BLOODLUST 6823        13   7  0    67       4000 BLOWS (107)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 FLOOD 7256                    7   9  1    66       NATURAL DISASTERS (159)
-IRREVOCABILITY 6549          12   9  1    60       ELOQUENT KNIGHTS (518)
 URBAN 7035                   12   2  0    60       DARQUE AGES (536)
 KARATE WRECKER 6693           6  10  0    60       THIEVES GUILD (396)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 MOUSTACHED RAT 7246          10   1  2    55       MY BRAIN ON CHLORINE (555)
 VILLEHDOL 5948                8   3  0    55       VOUGEOOT (464)
 THE TAIL 7253                10   8  0    52       RED DOG GANG (476)
 ONE-TIMER 7169                8   2  0    51       DEATH STUDS VII (301)
 ASSHE-MASTER 7000            11   4  0    47       4000 BLOWS (107)
-VIKEN 6943                    9   9  1    46       LOSERS (544)
 SANDY BEACH 6957              6   3  0    46       SWIFT CURRENT (468)
 55 SUCKS MORE 6956            8   9  1    45       JOKA MASHER! (283)
 KING 7267                     7   8  1    43       RED DOG GANG (476)
 DANDY-LION 7278               6   3  0    39       CHEER-O-KEE'S (557)
 ANASTASIUS 6839               5   2  2    39       DARQUE AGES (536)
 MISS FORTUNE 7296             5   0  0    39       THE MISGUIDED (559)
 RIP RAP 6599                  7   9  0    38       SWIFT CURRENT (468)
 TRAD 7247                     8   4  1    37       MY BRAIN ON CHLORINE (555)
-MANAGER 7094                  4   7  0    37       LOSERS (544)
 SLIPKNOT 6674                 6  11  0    35       THIEVES GUILD (396)
 FLOWER 7255                   8  10  0    34       RED DOG GANG (476)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-ZIPPER 4404                   1   3  0    33       RESCUE RANGERS (362)
 TELESPHORUS 7071              5   8  0    30       DARQUE AGES (536)
-SOULTAKER 7175                3   2  0    30       LOSERS (544)
 TSUNAMI 7273                  2   8  0    30       NATURAL DISASTERS (159)
 CHINESE SPARERIB 7248         7   5  0    29       MY BRAIN ON CHLORINE (555)
 STEVIE 7271                   5   7  0    29       RED DOG GANG (476)
 POINTY STICK 7277             5   4  0    29       CHEER-O-KEE'S (557)
-DALE 4406                     2   1  0    27       RESCUE RANGERS (362)
 HOLLY SKULL 7276              3   4  0    26       CHEER-O-KEE'S (557)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 REBEL W/O CAUSE 7252          3   0  0    23       JOKA MASHER! (283)
 DERALD 7285                   2   1  0    23       4000 BLOWS (107)
 DHOOWE 6010                   3   5  2    22       VOUGEOOT (464)
 SHMAMY CROCKETT 7216          2   1  0    22       4000 BLOWS (107)
 WURL POOLE 6799               3   4  0    21       SWIFT CURRENT (468)
 SPEEDY 7293                   3   2  0    20       THE MISGUIDED (559)
-TINY TIM 6042                 3   0  0    19       CRAZY CREEPS (207)
 SIDE-BAR 7304                 2   1  0    18       LEGALESE (449)
 CHEER FULL OWL 7274           4   5  0    17       CHEER-O-KEE'S (557)
 MOUSE 7318                    1   0  0    16       SILENT WARRIORS (561)
 AUFTHAURS 7300                2   2  0    15       VOUGEOOT (464)
 ASSASSIN 7317                 1   0  0    15       SILENT WARRIORS (561)
 IN PARI DELICTO 7283          3   5  0    14       LEGALESE (449)
 GADGET 4574                   1   1  0    11       RESCUE RANGERS (362)
 SHADOW 7321                   1   0  0    10       SILENT WARRIORS (561)
 WHAFOON 7315                  1   0  0    10       VOUGEOOT (464)
 ROCKY BANKS 7073              2   3  0     9       SWIFT CURRENT (468)
 HAMMER 7297                   2   3  0     9       THE MISGUIDED (559)
-EBENEZER SCROOGE 5953         1   3  0     6       CRAZY CREEPS (207)
 MISS UNDERSTOOD 7301          1   2  0     5       THE MISGUIDED (559)
 URBAN II 7174                 1   2  0     5       DARQUE AGES (536)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 PANTHER 7320                  0   1  0     1       SILENT WARRIORS (561)
 HONNI HONNI HONNI 7286        0   1  0     1       4000 BLOWS (107)
 YMCA 7302                     0   1  0     1       MY BRAIN ON CHLORINE (555)
 GHOST 7319                    0   1  0     1       SILENT WARRIORS (561)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
1-LITTLE INDIAN 7322   0  1 0 CHEER-O-KEE'S 557     SPYMASTER 22          359 NONE    
BOB 7295               0  5 0 THE MISGUIDED 559     SPYMASTER 22          359 NONE    
A 7316                 0  1 0 MY BRAIN ON CHLOR 555 STONE GOLEM 26        359 NONE    
OIL CHECK 7250         6  4 0 MY BRAIN ON CHLOR 555 WILDFIRE 6983         355 NOT REVE
DICHABOD 6912          4  8 0 THIEVES GUILD 396     STONE GOLEM 26        359 NONE    
LEGS ANDARMS 7020      2  4 0 THIEVES GUILD 396     ARENAMASTER HARKON 23 359 NONE    

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Soulie -- Nice challenges! -- Barnabas

Nuln -- Yeah brother, see you're still kickin' the shiznit out of things around here. 
-- Barnabas

Miss U. -- Careful how you walk on those -- Rocky Banks!

I'm back y'all!  I'm back y'all!  I'm backity back and I'm back y'all! -- Silent 
Warriors

Joe, ruler of Aradi -- Thanks for clarifying.  I always wondered who ran this town.
-- Nuln

Barnabas -- Welcome back, it's always nice to have some real competition around.  
Seen any of the other Rio Vistans sneaking about the cow fields? -- Nuln

Stevie -- Maybe you should ask Joe. -- anon. person who reads newsletter

     Somebody reads the newsletter?  Coulda fooled me!

Angry Santa -- Can I say suck my butt in the personals? -- Son of Bloodlust

     Probably not.

the Tail -- You'll need more constitutionals if you want to tango with the likes of 
me, dog boy!  But if you ever want to go to the park and play frisbee, just let me 
know. -- Asshe-master

Nuln -- boB is in the House. -- boB

FONZ -- All of my challenges were from you guys.  I feel at home. -- Shaman

Fonzers -- Wow, nice to see the band getting back together.  Now that Gummi Ghoul is 
graduated there isn't anything keeping this team around, so hopefully I can be back 
soon with something more my style. :) -- Anti

Nuln -- Bloop. -- Anti

Inferno -- What the heck is up with your team and warrior names?  I can't tell if you 
choose your names with a spoonful of Alpha Bits or what.  I keep looking at them and 
thinking that there's some hidden order or message or something.  Like when you see a 
word written backwards (ONREFNI) or Pig Latin or where you have to remove every 
second letter to see the actual word.  Please save me the strain and stress of trying 
to figure it out. -- Death Stud

Consortiumites?  That's a weird word.  It sounds like some sort of rock structure 
that hangs off the roofs of caves or something.  Or maybe a rare mineral that is 
mined deep in the jungle of impoverished African countries. -- Death Studs

     Exactly.

Nuln -- Hey dummasse, try turning off the HTML on your email when you send in your 
personal ads.  Doyee. -- helpful citizen of Aradi, afraid of the dire consequences to 
your person should you continue to thoughtlessly annoy Ed.

     Or Temp Ed.  I have less patience.

Urban -- We like Roman numerals.  Would you like to join the team? -- Death Studs VII

Nuln -- Misleading Inferno is not difficult and often happens by accident.  I think 
it has more to do with the subject in question than with any specific malicious 
action by myself. -- Death Stud

Ooh, Aradi cool word award of the week goes to Nuln for his use of "voluminous" last 
week whilst schooling Chromey.
    vo7lu7mi7nous (adj.)
    1. Having great volume, fullness, size, or number: a voluminous trunk; a
       voluminous cloud.
    2. Filling or capable of filling a large volume or many volumes: the voluminous
       court record of the long trial.
    3. Ample or lengthy in speech or writing.
    4. Having many coils; winding.
Used in context as: "...I will juststand in awe of your voluminous personals 
prowess."  I know you all thought it would go to Creepster for his clever use of the 
little known "kowabungaliscious" and it was in the running, no doubt.  The tie-
breaker went to Nuln for being slightly less of an annoying retard than Creepster. -- 
Death Stud

Far too easily amused -- And a very small slack shoe it is. -- Death Stud

Shaman -- Cardinal broken rule #1: you really shouldn't use the words "talent" and 
"FONZ" in the same sentence.  You did last week and now have forced me to do so again 
in pointing out your error.  Now I am sure to go 0-5 as well. -- Death Stud

Sultan -- Don't give Soultaker any more credit than he is due (thus, no credit should 
be awarded).  That lazy bastard get ME motivated?!?!?  That's a laugh and a half.  
HAHA HA <<--(1.5 laughs).  I will thank you to lavish yonder misplaced praise upon 
me, its deserving recipient from now on.  I await the gentle lapping of your 
appreciation. -- Death Stud
P.S.  Let's hear more from you, too!

Son of Bloodlust -- Crybaby. -- Angry Santa

Brushfire -- Sissy.  That all you got? -- Typhoon

Asshe-Master -- You may have WON, but the crowd liked ME better.  Everybody loves a 
good dog, you know.  Except villains. -- The Tail

Dooneushmun -- You were MEAN to me!  You had a rolled up newspaper in your pocket, I 
could SMELL it there, I could HEAR it sniggering at me!  And I didn't mean to.  I 
mean, the slipper was right THERE, right in FRONT of me, so I thought it was a GIFT.  
And I only chewed it a little.  Honest! -- Pretty Boy
P.S.  You should wash your feet oftener.  Your slipper tasted awful.

Soultaker -- Well, you can't have mine.  Anyway, you have to stick to people souls, 
don't you?  Dog souls are too big for your soul-sack. -- Stevie

Hammer -- Yeah, you can do it!  THROW that stick!  I'll bring it back for you. -- 
King

Tsunami -- At least you didn't come with soap.  But you had that look, you know, the 
one that says "Bath," and I wasn't taking any chances. -- Flower

Ed. -- Not to be contradictory, which no good dog would do, but do you really think 
Aradi would use something as logical as the metric system?  They probably measure in 
cubits. -- Spot, Red Dog Gang

Sultan  -- My aren't we vocal all of a sudden.  Good to see that you still can see to 
read the personals. -- Soultaker

Shaman -- I really need to get a hold of ya.  Will try to contact ya through web 
site.  Now that you are back with SamWise and Anti we will show those west coast 
FONZites who is boss. -- Soultaker

Death Stud -- Not asleep just bored by all your trivial ramblings. Soultaker

     I was so tempted to leave in some of the <DIV> annd &nbsp;....

Crazy -- I thought you were in forced retirement?  Go back to that nut house. --
Soultaker

Consortium -- It is easy to rule an empty empire.  Hell it is easy to rule a full one 
here.  Since your departure this has become an arena of npc's and has-beens. -- 
Soultaker

Death Stud, Nuln, Snotman, and so on -- Read the above personal. -- Soultaker

Aradi Pride -- Back off.  This is the dawning of a new era of slander and jibes. -- 
Soultaker

Nuln -- Wow!!!  Your forced vacation from the sands has really help you.  I feel that 
the time and money spent on your speech therapy was well spent. -- Soultaker

Ed. -- I see we are both amazed at Death Stud's attempt at comunication. -- Soultaker

     She went on vacation.  But she's amazed anyway, I'm sure.

Sultan -- Ah yes I too have to live with mediocrity.  When you are surrounded by the 
likes of Nuln, Snotman, Death Stud, and Anti you really must lower ones standards.  
Just think, it only gets worse, now Inferno is back.  Misery hath no bounds. -- 
Soultaker

Barnabas, SamWise, and the ghost of Mad Max&nbsp; --&nbsp; I really have 
tons to say to all of ya, but never sure if you will be here to grasp it.&nbsp; 
Soultaker

Guardian -- Really good to see ya hanging around. -- Soultaker

Shaman -- I am impressed that you can fight your way to top unchartered team while 
not having to win your fights. -- Soultaker

Nulner than you -- I think I may need a better set of warriors to compete with you 
here. -- Inferno
P.S.  On the other hand, I may just be slipping.
P.P.S.  At least he wasn't leading me the wrong way.

King -- Right turn, left turn, bounce off the knee, a kick to the ribs, and no wet 
nose.  Nothing strange when you can't turn that far. -- Dooneushmun

Sultan -- I would say that running, receiving turns, and acccomplishing something 
would count as something more than living off of old memories like that Hoffa guy. -- 
Inferno, live in claymation

1 March 2005
                                    The Contract
                         [as retold by Hammer the WordSmith]
     What had begun as a contract for swords and armor between a well known name in
the DM community and the former VC Captain/WordSmith and WeaponSmith of the Vendetta
Cartel Tarantula Tribe was destined to impact and altar the landscape of the dueling
community for years to come.
     The following is but a condensed retelling of history in the making.

    Hammer continued sipping his tankard of Elven Tonic as the mysterious hooded
figure quietly seated himself across the table from the Veteran Manager whose back
was against the wall; allowing for a subtle, but effective surveillance of the dimly
lit tavern.
     Recent events in both Illis and North Fork/SCOMSS Swamp Arena had stunned the DM
managerial world with the announcement that Hammer had resigned from his position as
a well respected member of the Vendetta Cartel Alliance.
     Those managers and associates closest to Hammer were shocked and dismayed that
there seemed to be NO Rational Explanation for Hammer making such a seemingly
irrational, hasty and extremely illogical decision; by what seemed to be a spur of
the moment reaction following the Declaration of War by Hammer in the DM 47 P-ads.
     This is what stirred the mysterious hooded figure to seek Hammer with a request
that would change the managerial course of both men; ultimately Rocking the
Managerial World of Alastari as a result of the forthcoming decisions reached by the
two Veterans.
     Time passed swiftly as both Veteran Managers discussed how the landscape of the
DM game on the sands of Alastari had changed over the years both in Basic and Tourney
play; producing a new breed of managers who would of necessity band together in an
alliance with a common goal; waging war against antagonists while improving the
managerial skills of each participating member in their glorious quest for DM
excellence.
     Hammer listened intently as his unexpected guest inquired about the situation in
North Fork/SCOMSS Swamp Arena; revealing his desire to participate in the upcoming
Turf War 4 contest in DM 47 with an alliance that would accept him on a more
permanent basis other than for just fighting together as a TW4 alliance to win fame
and Gift Certs.
     Here was a Veteran Manager, seeking the advice of Hammer regarding an alliance
to join on a permanent basis; plus extending a sword arm of friendship and requesting
that Hammer join him as an alliance mate with those who would welcome their
membership.
     The Iron in the Words of Hammer had produced this opportunity as a result of the
recent conflicts witnessed first hand by the manager seated across the table from
Hammer.  This Veteran Manager had been secretly searching and scouting around
Alastari for someone worth his mettle to fight alongside; someone who would know
where to find the perfect gang of rebels who were unafraid of waging war against
anyone.
     Hammer knew exactly where to look and in a matter of days the two newcomers were
welcomed into the ranks of a group of managers who received them as war waging equals
in an alliance that had joined a Confederation of Alliances for the TW4 contest.
     Fighting under the banner of The Illuminati Confederation of Alliances alongside
members of Chaos Inc, kLk and The Company of Brothers during the TW4 was more than
either of the two Veteran Managers had envisioned a few months ago.
     Hammer was now entering a new journey with a new attitude.
     Perhaps you readers may have noticed that new attitude by now since this
announcement by Hammer is uncharacteristically Exclamation Point Free.
     Except for the famous quote by Hammer at the end of this announcement.
     Now that Hammer and the Mysterious Hooded Figure have agreed to join forces with

an alliance whose members have welcomed them enthusiastically; let those who desire
to be antagonistic be forewarned as to the identities of these newly welcomed wagers
of war:

Tripwire
kLk Bringer of Pain

Hammer
kLk WordSmith and WeaponSmith
Minister of War
Illuminati Idealist

     "May Your Blades Be Sharp and Your Wits Sharper!"

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

DICHABOD was butchered by STONE GOLEM in a unpopular 4 minute Dark Arena fight.
LEGS ANDARMS was murdered by ARENAMASTER HARKON in a 1 minute Dark Arena melee.
BOB was murdered by SPYMASTER in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
A was dispatched by STONE GOLEM in a 3 minute Dark Arena brawl.
1-LITTLE INDIAN was butchered by SPYMASTER in a 1 minute gory Dark Arena fight.
WILDFIRE was subdued by DEMURRER in a 4 minute master's Challenge competition.
ANGRY SANTA was defeated by DOONEUSHMUN in a 1 minute veteran's Challenge struggle.
BRUSHFIRE slimly lost to TYPHOON XXII in a dull 81 minute expert's Challenge fight.
URBAN won victory over THE TAIL in a popular 3 minute Challenge duel.
ONE-TIMER won victory over KING in a 3 minute Challenge duel.
FLOOD overpowered ASSHE-MASTER in a action packed 1 minute one-sided Challenge fight.
CHINESE SPARERIB beat WURL POOLE in a 1 minute Challenge fight.
URBAN II was demolished by AUFTHAURS in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match.
MISS UNDERSTOOD was overcome by GADGET in a 1 minute novice's Challenge contest.
ROCKY BANKS was demolished by POINTY STICK in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge brawl.
SPEEDY unbelievably bested IN PARI DELICTO in a popular 3 minute Challenge conflict.
THE-SHOCKER was overpowered by RIFF in a action packed 1 minute uneven Title struggle.
SON OF BLOODLUST was overpowered by LEO in a crowd pleasing 1 minute mismatched brawl.
KARATE WRECKER was defeated by PRETTY BOY in a 2 minute veteran's bout.
FLOWER was savagely defeated by 55 SUCKS MORE in a exciting 5 minute gory bout.
SLIPKNOT was overcome by TRAD in a crowd pleasing 1 minute competition.
SANDY BEACH overpowered HOLLY SKULL in a 1 minute uneven fight.
RIP RAP was subdued by MOUSTACHED RAT in a action packed 1 minute bout.
TELESPHORUS slimly lost to MISS FORTUNE in a 3 minute master vs. novice upset fray.
VILLEHDOL defeated TSUNAMI in a action packed 1 minute brutal fight.
STEVIE was defeated by DANDY-LION in a 1 minute duel.
ANASTASIUS overpowered DHOOWE in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
DERALD was vanquished by RUTHLESS JAYWALKER in a 1 minute uneven bout.
REBEL W/O CAUSE overcame CHEER FULL OWL in a 1 minute bout.
HAMMER was handily defeated by SHMAMY CROCKETT in a 1 minute mismatched bout.
SIDE-BAR vanquished GHOST in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
WHAFOON overpowered YMCA in a 1 minute uneven duel.
ASSASSIN overpowered POLITE BEGGAR in a 1 minute one-sided match.
MOUSE defeated TRUSTWORTHY SCRIBE in a exciting 1 minute novice's fight.
PANTHER was overpowered by TRUSTWORTHY SCRIBE in a 1 minute one-sided fray.
SHADOW vanquished HONNI HONNI HONNI in a 1 minute mismatched fight.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                  14         SLASHING ATTACK   27 -  14 -  1      66  |
|TOTAL PARRY                     13         WALL OF STEEL     17 -  14 -  0      55  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                 12         TOTAL PARRY       43 -  37 -  1      54  |
|AIMED BLOW                       8         AIMED BLOW        21 -  19 -  1      53  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  6         LUNGING ATTACK    30 -  30 -  0      50  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   3         PARRY-LUNGE        4 -   6 -  0      40  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    2         STRIKING ATTACK   28 -  45 -  1      38  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     2         PARRY-RIPOSTE      7 -  13 -  0      35  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    2         BASHING ATTACK     9 -  20 -  0      31  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      1         PARRY-STRIKE       1 -   4 -  0      20  |

Turn 359 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

SLASHING ATTACK    5 -  1     TOTAL PARRY        5 -  8         5  TOTAL PARRY    
BASHING ATTACK     2 -  1     STRIKING ATTACK    3 -  9         2  STRIKING ATTACK
AIMED BLOW         5 -  3     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  1         1  BASHING ATTACK 
LUNGING ATTACK     8 -  6     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  2         1  AIMED BLOW     
WALL OF STEEL      1 -  1     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  2         1  SLASHING ATTACK
                                                                1  LUNGING ATTACK 

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
STRIKING ATTACK  RIFF 6452                  14   6  3  138 SWIFT CURRENT (468)
TOTAL PARRY      TYPHOON XXII 6827          22   4  1  114 DEATH STUDS VII (301)
AIMED BLOW       LEO 6837                   10   3  0   92 DARQUE AGES (536)
SLASHING ATTACK  DOONEUSHMUN 5949           10   2  0   91 VOUGEOOT (464)
LUNGING ATTACK   SON OF BLOODLUST 6823      13   7  0   67 4000 BLOWS (107)
WALL OF STEEL    THE TAIL 7253              10   8  0   52 RED DOG GANG (476)
BASHING ATTACK   ANASTASIUS 6839             5   2  2   39 DARQUE AGES (536)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is DEMURRER 5828.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was IN PARI DELICTO 7283.  The ten other most popular fighters were DEMURRER 5828, 55 
SUCKS MORE 6956, THE TAIL 7253, A 7316, KING 7267, FLOWER 7255, TRAD 7247, 
TELESPHORUS 7071, MISS FORTUNE 7296, and WILDFIRE 6983.

The least popular fighter this week was TYPHOON XXII 6827.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were BRUSHFIRE 7168, DICHABOD 6912, HONNI HONNI HONNI 7286, YMCA 
7302, GHOST 7319, HAMMER 7297, DERALD 7285, DHOOWE 6010, HOLLY SKULL 7276, and 
SLIPKNOT 6674.

The following warriors will travel to AD after next turn:

RIFF (60-6452) SWIFT CURRENT (468)