Date   : 11/27/2006    Duedate: 12/09/2006


DM-62    TURN-397

This Weeks Top Honors


(62-4052) [13-6-0,115]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

                               RANDOM SITH (438)
                               (62-4316) [5-2-1,57]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

MIDDLE WAY 10 (420)            ALL ABOUT BASHERS (433)
(62-4220) [11-22-0,55]         (62-4276) [8-4-0,84]



Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. EVIL DEATH DUDES (392)      64
2. AS SEEN ON TV (361)         52      EVIL DEATH DUDES (392)
3. ALL ABOUT BASHERS (433)     31      Unchartered Team
4. LEGION OF LEGEND (409)      26
5. COLORS (186)                17      COLORS (186)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 0*COLORS (186)               3   2  1 60.0   1/ 1*RANDOM SITH (438)        10  5 1
 2/ 1*RANDOM SITH (438)         21  15  3 58.3   2/ 3 RIO VISTANS (348)        10  5 0
 3/ 0 EVIL DEATH DUDES (392)    33  28  3 54.1   3/ 7 AS SEEN ON TV (361)       7  3 0
 4/ 2 ALL ABOUT BASHERS (433)   25  22  1 53.2   4/ 4 ALL ABOUT BASHERS (433)   7  7 0
 5/ 4 LEGION OF LEGEND (409)    37  34  2 52.1   5/ 2 MASTERS OF RAGE (301)     5  8 1
 6/ 3 RIO VISTANS (348)        161 149 11 51.9   6/ 0 EVIL DEATH DUDES (392)    4  1 1
 7/ 5 AS SEEN ON TV (361)      146 149 10 49.5   7/ 8 PRIVATE IDAHO (439)       4  5 0
 8/ 6 SINFUL SISTER (430)       27  28  1 49.1   8/ 5 SINFUL SISTER (430)       4  6 0
 9/ 7 MIDDLE WAY 10 (420)      166 207  4 44.5   9/ 9 LEGION OF LEGEND (409)    3  0 0
10/ 8 MASTERS OF RAGE (301)     72 100  7 41.9  10/ 0*COLORS (186)              2  2 1
11/ 9 PRIVATE IDAHO (439)       11  25  1 30.6  11/ 6 MIDDLE WAY 10 (420)       2 13 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

Good day, Valamantinians!
     I somehow managed to fend off that convicted assassin character, so I hold the
title at least one more turn.  I have a feeling I'll be having a showdown with Euro
Shark this time, so I will more than likely still be the Duelmaster next turn as
well.  Just because he TV'd he thinks he is all bad and stuff.  Well, I've got a news
flash for him...he's not.  All right, enough talk, I've got left over Thanksgiving
food to eat.
     T.R., Duelmaster and noted mathematician

                                      SPY REPORT

     Greetings, Warriors of VALAMANTIS.  Allow this humble servant Novgorodny Vir to 
give you a respite from the fights in the form of this Spyreport.  Those betting on 
MIDDLE WAY 10 lost their shirt, as MIDDLE WAY 10 lost their fighting abilities:  
0-5-0.  What's a move up by 4 you ask?  (alright, maybe you didn't ask)  Cause for 
celebration, according to AS SEEN ON TV.  Say what you will about blind luck and 
dirty fighting, but LEGION OF LEGEND will tell you 37-34-2 is nothing to laugh at...  
Practice pays for DARTH TIMMY, who pummelled VALAMOND JR., to pocket 21 points.  Win 
some, lose some.  Speaking of which, DARTH TIMMY was winsome, after beating VALAMOND 
JR. and seeing him lose 44 points.  The arena was more crowded than usual this time, 
as EURO SHARK faced VALAMANTIS' Duelmaster.  In VALAMANTIS, nothing is permanent 
(except Death), and we find ourselves a new Duelmaster, EURO SHARK.  So who was the 
warrior seen charging into immovable walls and challenging dead trees?  Someone's got 
a basic problem...   
     So much to report, so little time!  Like a horde of jackals fleeing from the 
lion, so did the "warriors" in VALAMANTIS avoid RANDOM SITH.  The warriors of RANDOM 
SITH found their efforts at combat frustrated as RIO VISTANS apparently had more 
important things to do than fight.  If challenges were horses, ERFIN GORAM could open 
up a fast food joint!  Word has it GREAT WEAPON CHOICE suffered a romantic setback.  
Note how she challenged JEFFRO, 35 points hers senior.  It's not whether you win or 
lose, but how many points you get (7).  Right, GREAT WEAPON CHOICE?  YOU OWE ME 1 
DOLLAR found himself challenged by a warrior 21 below:  A.T. JR.  A.T. JR of RIO 
VISTANS kept his wits as he was defeated by YOU OWE ME 1 DOLLAR.   
     Ah, the duel!  The roar of the oppenent, the smell of the crowd!  Oh hard!  that 
to strike a flame, the match itself must needs be wasting!   
     Do not think spyreporting in VALAMANTIS is the highlight of my life.  Keep those 
sands bloody and the buzzards fat!  Can anything compare to the pleasure of writing 
Spyreports for VALAMANTIS?  On that giddy note I take my leave-- Novgorodny Vir  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 EURO SHARK 4052              13   6  0   115       AS SEEN ON TV (361)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 JEFFRO 3410                  30  19  0   115       RIO VISTANS (348)
 DARTH TIMMY 3781             10   3  0   108       EVIL DEATH DUDES (392)
 BUZZ 3809                    13   5  0   104       RIO VISTANS (348)
 T.R. 4249                    12   5  0    92       RIO VISTANS (348)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 EVIL WEEVIL 3779              8   4  1    87       EVIL DEATH DUDES (392)
 VALAMOND JR. 3298            14   8  2    85       MASTERS OF RAGE (301)
 BERTHA 2867                  15  17  2    84       MASTERS OF RAGE (301)
-ZEUS 4010                    12   3  0    84       LEGION OF LEGEND (409)
 GREAT WEAPON CHOICE 4276      8   4  0    84       ALL ABOUT BASHERS (433)
 EASY TWEEZE 3937             13  15  2    80       AS SEEN ON TV (361)
 CHIA EDEL 4219               18  15  0    69       MIDDLE WAY 10 (420)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 XAVIER 3265                  14  12  2    66       MASTERS OF RAGE (301)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 ZERO MAUL-ENVY 4342           6   1  1    64       ALL ABOUT BASHERS (433)
 DEATH WISH 3819               7   4  0    60       EVIL DEATH DUDES (392)
 BALI DARRAS 4221             13  20  0    59       MIDDLE WAY 10 (420)
 CHUCK 4281                    6   6  1    59       RIO VISTANS (348)
 DARTH SIDIUS 4316             5   2  1    57       RANDOM SITH (438)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 ERFIN GORAM 4220             11  22  0    55       MIDDLE WAY 10 (420)
 DARTH PLAGWEIS 4317           4   3  1    54       RANDOM SITH (438)
 YOU OWE ME 1 DOLLAR 4272      5   2  0    53       ALL ABOUT BASHERS (433)
 AEROBED 4005                 11   9  0    50       AS SEEN ON TV (361)
 REVEN 4318                    7   1  1    50       RANDOM SITH (438)
 GINSU CLASSIC 4084            4   2  1    48       AS SEEN ON TV (361)
 MARTAVIUS 3612               13   8  0    47       MASTERS OF RAGE (301)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 HOME WRECKER 4241             6   7  0    32       SINFUL SISTER (430)
 IXION 4238                    4   2  0    30       LEGION OF LEGEND (409)
 PROSTITUTE 4240               8   5  0    29       SINFUL SISTER (430)
 MR MASTODON 4343              2   0  0    28       PRIVATE IDAHO (439)
-UNCLE BUCK 4333               4   3  1    26       PRIVATE IDAHO (439)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 A.T. JR 4344                  2   5  0    23       RIO VISTANS (348)
 DARTH NIKILUS 4358            2   2  0    17       RANDOM SITH (438)
 MORNING STAR GLORY 4365       1   1  0    13       ALL ABOUT BASHERS (433)
-CATTY WOMPUS 4354             1   0  0    13       PRIVATE IDAHO (439)
 SWIVEL SWEEPER 4366           2   0  0    12       AS SEEN ON TV (361)
 MR. BIG BAD 3943              3   2  0    11       EVIL DEATH DUDES (392)
 THE SMITER 4149               1   0  1    11       EVIL DEATH DUDES (392)
 DARTH SCION 4357              3   1  0    10       RANDOM SITH (438)
 LARGE MARGE 4326              2   1  0    10       PRIVATE IDAHO (439)
 BARBAROSA 4360                1   0  0    10       LEGION OF LEGEND (409)
 CHICKS DIG 'EM 4353           0   3  0     9       ALL ABOUT BASHERS (433)
 BLUE 1172                     1   0  1     8       COLORS (186)
 GREEN 1176                    1   0  0     7       COLORS (186)
 ROBERT THE BRUCE 4359         1   0  0     7       LEGION OF LEGEND (409)
-RED 1173                      1   0  0     6       COLORS (186)
 DOMINATRIX 4346               1   2  0     5       SINFUL SISTER (430)
 GABRELLA IMBRO 4355           0   4  0     4       MIDDLE WAY 10 (420)
 YELLOW 1174                   0   1  0     1       COLORS (186)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
PURPLE 1175            0  1 0 COLORS 186            THE SMITER 4149       397         
ELDA GORISH 4368       0  2 0 MIDDLE WAY 10 420     BLUE 1172             397         
DANA FRISS 4230       14 11 0 MIDDLE WAY 10 420     VALAMOND JR. 3298     395         
FINILLA HARS 4246      6  9 0 MIDDLE WAY 10 420     CHUCK 4281            393 NOT REVE
SMASHER 4370           0  1 0 PRIVATE IDAHO 439     BLACK ORC 20          397 NONE    
MENAGE A TROIS 4243    6  4 0 SINFUL SISTER 430     REVEN 4318            394         
WHIPS AND CHAINS 4244  4  7 1 SINFUL SISTER 430     DARTH SIDIUS 4316     395         

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Uh oh, Father and Son duke it out for the throne of Valamantis.  Looks to be a rough
Thanksgiving either way. -- Nuln

Martavius -- Thanks for providing a safe harbor last turn. -- Great Weapon Choice

Chuck -- Can I call you Charles?  Otherwise whenever I'd see you I'd say "What's up

chuck?" which is just wrong. -- Z.M.E.
P.S.  Great fight, btw.  I never in a million years would have expected it to go
three whole minutes.  And the missus says I'm a one-minute man, this'll show her!

Prostitute -- You owe me $1. -- You Owe Me 1 Dollar
P.S.  It's not what you think.  You just owe me $1.  Trust me.

Darth Nikilas -- I need to shave. -- Chicks Dig 'Em, who just looked in the mirror
for the first time in a while

Darth Scion -- Durg, yer a tough little dude.  I think I'll be staying away for a
while. -- Morning Star unGloryous

Sentinel -- Is it true what the rumor mills say? -- Nuln

Indy -- Well, let's just say the zest was gone.  Speaking of which, this arena's
getting precariously close to being officially dinky again. Whatever happened to
"Valamantis Resurrection?" -- Nuln

Soultaker -- I have nothing to say to you. -- Nuln

<blowing mightily on the mighty FONZ conch shell> .... FONZ team members,
ASSEMBLE!!!! -- Nuln, trying a different technique

Bali Darras -- Does this mean you don't want to go to dinner? -- Great Weapon Choice,
looking into purchasing x-tra leg armor

Nuln -- That was a great fight between Chuck and ZME.  Unfortunately for me, I did
not send in a strat sheet for Chuck last time because he was at 10 FE and I wanted to
save him for the face.  The unfortunate part is that I forgot I have this team on
maintenance.  So now he'll be, like, 15 FE for the face.  The fight did confirm my
suspicions about fighting him a certain way though, so that was good. -- Pauly
P.S.  You need to dethrone Indimar in Aradi, because if he defends the throne a
second time he's gonna have to start carrying his ego around in a wheelbarrow.

Indimar -- No offense meant, it's just jealousy. -- Pauly

All -- So, who you gotta sleep with around here to graduate? -- Jeffro

Pauly -- By now T.R. and Euro Shark have crossed blades.  Someone has to lose...I
hope it's you. -- Indimar

Nuln -- I know a couple of measly personals like this will not do much to increase
the zestiness level around here.  I will strive to do better in the future. --

Nuln -- One more thing.  When you were a little kid did you know you wanted to be a
Chaos Lord when you grew up? -- I.F.

Aerobed -- What you sound like to me is, you sound like some fancy brand of shirt.
Not that I can tell what you're wearing.  Well, in the locker room, I can, I guess.
I mean, that one you hung up in your locker had LACE down the front!  Revolting.
Probably unmanly.  I mean, there were hearts worked into that lace, and some kind of
daisies, too.  NOT what I expected, actually.  I always thought Aerobed shirts were,
broadcloth with maybe pearl buttons and just a monogram or something.  But what do I
know? -- Erfin Goram
P.S.  I always had a secret hankering for a "poet shirt," actually.  Even if they DO
have lace and ruffles and stuff.

Buzz -- You always remind me of my dentist.  She's a good dentist, but...not a
pleasant memory even so.  There are all these DRILLS, you know?  And NEEDLES.  It
puts me off. -- Bali Darras, uneasy but with good teeth

Darth Plagweis.  Siewgalp Thrad.  It just doesn't have a ring to it either way.
Maybe you should think about being somebody else for a while?  That can be very
relaxing.  I take a vacation every now and then in a different identity.  Not that
I'll go into the details, that's purely a need-to-know deal.  And you don't.  But
think seriously about being somebody else.  It might help. -- Chia Edel
P.S.  Or at least go hang out under a hill for a while.

Large Marge -- You really have that "looming" business down pat.  And you're only an
inch taller than I am.  So it must be some sort of psychic loom. -- Elda Gorish

Swivel Sweeper -- I tell you plainly, the way you were (ugh!) moving around and
swiveling your hips while you danced with that broom, heck, DANCED?  You practically
humped it!  It was disgusting, is what it was. -- Gabrella Imbro

T.R. -- You don't think it will make me look too fat? -- C.E.

2 November 2006
I received a Gift Certificate from someone.  I'm assuming it's for entry into the
Turf War 5.  Whoever sent this to me...please email me at rbaphomets@yahoo.com.

10 November 2006
     The Quest of the Best has come to an end.  Dark Knight Toker, host of the Quest,
wants to proclaim the Ultimate Victor and give a listing of prize winners.
     Lady Fern and her Flower Girls of the Consortium are the Ultimate Victors of the
Quest.  Well fought and there's nothing like coming from behind to leave us all in
the dust.  Can't wait to see you defend your title! (wink)
     Here is a complete list of managers who placed in prize positions:

1)  Lady Fern, mgr. Flower Girls
2)  Le Pentarque, mgr. Blood & Guts!
3)  Crip, mgr. Otto's Parts
4)  D.K. Heathen Hatebred, mgr. Odin's Chosen
5)  Ghab, mgr. Assassin Nation
6)  Fanthayne, mgr. Dark Raiders
7)  D.K. Toker, mgr. Silver Knights
8)  D.K. Wasby, mgr. Bronze Knights
9)  The Expatriate, mgr. Bleak Legion
10) Still the Distilled, mgr. Springborne Fair

     Thanks to all that had the gall to show up, but I really want to thank the
managers that had the mettle to survive and not run when they started getting their
butt handed to them.
                                                           Respect to All.
                                                           Quest #1 host,
                                                           Dark Knight Toker

14 November 2006
                                      A Tale of
                        Fusion Confusion Delusion Revolution
                                     as told by
                                Hammer the WordSmith

     SomeWhere Beyond ElseWhere and ElseWhen a hooded figure brooded upon the
lingering wisps of memory from days gone by.
     From the howling sands to the sanding howls the streams of thought bubbled and
flowed, winding endlessly entwined within the darkest recesses and lightest resources
of the learned and unlearned disciplines of managerial mayhem and manipulation.
     Nameless faces and faceless names floated in the swirling mists of madness
embalmed within the memories of one who knew he did not know how far reaching the
influences [both positive and negative] had rooted and flowered in the march of time
and energy expended in the historical markings of gladiatorial essence and excellence
     The tamed and the untamed coupled with the named and the unnamed resources that
spilt their sweat and blood on the sands of arenas both known and unknown had
metamorphosed into the dreamings and the schemings of the fadings of jadings and
paradings [in both public and private] amongst the elite and the indiscreet
posturings and babblings of managers becoming legends in their own minds and times.
     Hammer pondered upon beginnings and the seemingly endless myriad of endings
possibly possible among the interspersed and intertwined impossible possibilities
presently past and future.
     Echoing and reechoing in the vast depths and countless compartments along the
corridors of his mind, Hammer played and replayed the glories shared and dared in the
sixty-plus stabled arena on fabled Noblish Island DM 93.
     The training had been all too brief, but the competition generated by the multi
faceted personages inhabiting DM 93 and the sheer multitude of numbers had forever
instilled themselves in the heart and soul of the veteran manager [Hammer]; insomuch
that the migration to Niatoli Island DM 33 triggered the desire to emulate the glory
and the grandeur of the spectacle of stables vying for recognition from among the
virtually numberless no-name newbies making names for themselves as they numbered
their stables and accomplishments for all to see and behold, to the song and the
sound of the sight of clashing cold cruel steel simmering the flesh of gallant
gladiators consumed by the gory and the glory of crossing blades with the superior
and the inferior within the interior of Greywand's Global Gladiatorial Galaxy.
     Far far ago and long long away had many abandoned hope for a return to the
reminiscences revered by so many managers; predating even the generations of
gladiators graduating from Noblish Island and the years of yore and gore and
gallantry before.
     Rumblings and mumblings of a renovation rejuvenating the reflexes of managers
numbed by the numberless trysts of tourney tarnished stables began revolutionizing
the very fabric of time and space and time-honored tradition throughout the ranks of
visionary newbies and volatile veterans alike and dislike.
     History was being shaken to the core of the gore as glory and grandeur responded
to the revelry reverie revelations and reveille revolutionizing the creation of a new
arena in the making; populated by No-Tourney Warriors and Full Stable Participants
pledging to forge a new vision version of "The Fiercest and Best" for crossing blades
and crosser banter in the personal ads and team spotlight tomes.
     Now was the time for Hammer to emerge and once again merge his talent among the
gifted and grifted; answering the call to assemble the drifted [and to directly
divulge and converge with the dozens] for the destiny of destructive denizens
determined to build a new legacy upon the all-but-forgotten ashes of the old and
olden legends of times lost.
         [TIME JUMP]
     Hammer sifted the sands in the dead of night in the desert reaches [located
SomeWhere BeYond ElseWhere and ElseWhen] to discover 5 gladiators not tourney worthy,
yet interesting enough to begin their careers in a No-Tourney Arena!
     "They need not be dispatched to the Dark Arena," the veteran manager mused as he
sorted through paperwork long discarded and vaguely forgotten, "because there is
nothing like a good Blood Feud to provide inspiration for writing personal ads in the
arena newsletter! Besides, there are times when the replacement for a warrior wounded
mortally on the arena sands fares much better than the one exchanged from Torch
     Fights by Torch Light were certainly deemed unnecessary as Hammer had already
deduced that a number of determined stables would undoubtedly congregate with High
Octane Warriors under the guidance of Higher Octane Managers to populate and
depopulate the new No-Tourney Arena currently under construction in DM 81.
     Fortunately his feeble foray into the desert would yield somewhat suitable
candidates for the newfound purposes Hammer had in mind.
     From among the candidates to be found Hammer would be rewarded in time by
     Deep into the night Hammer searched and searched until five not-so-promising
stables were uncovered in the waning hours before dawn.
     Ripper discards were scattered far and wide, but this was not the time or the
hour to let sentimental views cloud the issue at hand.  Future events would lend
themselves to a suitable Ripper replacement, especially with the prospects Hammer was
now sorting for his selection decision to dispatch to the Gladiatorial Commission for
     Most managers have the luxury of selecting the best group [or discarding the
worst group!] Hammer had the novelty of rounding up the castaways from the New
Stables paperwork accumulated long ago from Maximillian's Morya Madness contest in DM
28 that were deemed below inferior as contest prizes [and thus banished from sight!]
     Hammer scrutinized and agonized over which group of gladiators were worth the
sacks of gold coins he was prepared to release to the Gladiatorial Commission for
fees to MAINTENANCE his new stable in the No-Tourney Arena.
     After what seemed like long hours passing by, Hammer discarded one and then
another group of hopefuls.  After lengthy debate a third was cast aside.  Deciding
between the final two groups found Hammer going back to interview the rejected
candidates time and time again [until a final decision was made that Hammer could
live with and his new stable could die with!] before the final quirks were hammered
out and pen put to paper to process the prospective puny stable with the Gladiatorial
     The only solace gained from the painful process was the knowledge that other
managers would be less tempted to run stables in DM 81 populated by their tourney-
worthy warriors [under the penalty of death imposed and enforced upon tourney
experienced gladiators by the Committee being formed to police and regulate such
matters!] as sworn to and signed in good faith by each registering manager.
         [TIME JUMP]
     Hammer had worked long and hard to find suitable candidates for his stable and
now it was time to begin their training.  The paperwork had been dispatched for
registration with the Gladiatorial Commission and now was the hour in which
preparation was paramount!
     Dispatch riders had arrived with the news that Considerable Bounty was being
offered as incentive rewards to those managers sending new stables to the No-Tourney
     Hammer realized this would Up the Ante [causing greater pause in the managerial
community for selecting suitable stables!] as the creative competition was certain to
escalate and produce Serious Sword Slinging Stables Staining the Arena Sands Red!
     Obviously a serious upgrade in the quality of competition migrating to the No-
Tourney Arena in DM 81 would definitely work in favor of Hammer; enormously
increasing the death toll percentage potential amongst the ranks of his new start-up
stable in DM 81 [Sands Running Red and Blood Feuds Running Rampant as Undoubtedly
     Hammer observed the futility of his new warriors training [as well as they could
for what they were made from!] while recent memories came to the forefront of his
     When the paperwork was nearly completed and names were selected for each
Gladiator, Hammer decided to name the stable according to what he had discovered in
the darkness while searching during the dismal hours of the desert night.
     These warriors would probably be more well suited to fight by Torch Light had
they fallen into the possession of most other managers!
     Paper Warriors better suited to confronting Dark Arena Monsters [rather than
being fed to the Gladiatorial Lions certain to be populating the regular No-Tourney
     Specimens blatantly better suited for feeding upon agitated armadillo ants than
for striving to attain recognition and fame in the No-Tourney Arena [or any arena!]
     Thus was AARDVARK HAMMERZ birthed and born for Greatness or Disgrace!
         [TIME JUMP]
     Dispatch riders on winged steeds brought the news Hammer had been awaiting!
     Not since the days of training on Noblish Island in DM 93 had Hammer encountered
such collective enthusiasm for crossing blades in a selected arena such as DM 81
[recalling the time Hammer generated a gathering of newbies to transfer to Niatoli
Island in DM 33 to match wits and cross blades with the assembling veterans upon
     The Consortium had represented the veterans well in DM 33 with the SWEETNESS
stable managed by Sweety Pie.  Now the good news had arrived that The Consortium was
seen registering a stable named LIFE IMPACTS in the No-Tourney Arena!
     Former alliance mates Darque and Kat had reportedly registered DARQUE AGES and
KATHOUSE with the Gladiatorial Commission.
     Morya Madness combatant LePentarque from DM 28 had registered LA PENTARCHIE and
longtime fixture Drake in North Fork DM 47 [recently returned from a lengthy hiatus]
had been lured by the competition to register DRAKE'S HARDWARE.
     Deke [at the helm of DOC LEGRAND'S LAB] was instrumental in promoting the No-
Tourney Arena by repeatedly negotiating terms with the Gladiatorial Commission.
Others had laid the groundwork before him, but Deke raised the banner and carried it
the final distance [Supported by Countless Managers too numerous to mention!] Salute
Yourselves for Your Efforts are Most Graciously Applauded throughout Alastari!
     Apex had signed in with CAROLINA BLUE as had Ghab with ASSASSIN NATION.
     Another familiar name was found on the rolls as DeGotti registered CULT OF
BACCHUS followed by DOOM KNIGHTS managed by Blackstorm.
     Also on the rolls to be noted were AS SEEN ON TV II managed by Indimar and
RAGNAROK'S WOLVES by none other than ragnorokwolf.
     Nomad had signed on with PHANTOM REGIMENT and Silas followed suit with
     Another notable signature was that of MasterBeru with CHILDHOOD HEROES and a
penchant for scribing Team Spotlights [A Plus in Any Arena!]
     Detective Kellumbo had followed the clues and was observed enroute to
registering a yet unannounced stable [such are the ways of sleuthhounds and such!]
     Rumor had it that the manager known as Roadkill was on his way to register a
stable after his namesake and Slugbait was close behind [obliviously lost in
     Finally [in no particular disorder!] managers Grimm, Woody, Terminator, Den and
Bill were also seen elbowing their way through the gathering registration crowd to
officially announce their participation in the No-Tourney Arena.
     COUNTLESS OTHER MANAGERS were known to be pondering the consequences of sending
stables to a No-Tourney Arena and had yet to make the commitment public knowledge as
to their intentions.
     Howbeit the Gladiatorial Commission was reportedly swamped with requests for New
Stable Registration Forms [whether for the Tempe Facer or No-Tourney Arena was
anybody's guess at the present time!]
     Judging from the furtive figures darting and ducking in the shadows and
alleyways throughout Alastari [as well as those huddled in taverns or communicating
with one another by various means available!] the success of such a No-Tourney Arena
was Ballooning far Beyond the Expectations of the Promoters and Petitioners Bar None!
had the Best Potential for attracting and assembling a congregation of competitors
rivaling the numbers of Noblish Island from days gone by!
       JANUARY 2007 MARKS THE BEGINNING of a Journey where both Newbies and Veterans
join together in a Historic Assemblage Celebrating the Crossing of Blades between
some of the Best Managed Stables in all of Alastari [Known and Unknown!]
                 "May Your Blades Be Sharp and Your Wits Sharper"
                                          Minister of War

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

SMASHER was butchered by BLACK ORC in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
EURO SHARK devastated T.R. in a action packed 1 minute one-sided Challenge Title duel.
BUZZ demolished BERTHA in a 1 minute bloody uneven Challenge fight.
EASY TWEEZE devastated CHIA EDEL in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge fight.
GREAT WEAPON CHOICE was luckily beaten by JEFFRO in a 4 minute Challenge competition.
ZERO MAUL-ENVY luckily beat BALI DARRAS in a 2 minute one-sided Challenge struggle.
CHUCK overcame ERFIN GORAM in a action packed 1 minute Challenge fight.
A.T. JR was vanquished by YOU OWE ME 1 DOLLAR in a 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
LARGE MARGE was overpowered by HOME WRECKER in a 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
MR MASTODON defeated DARTH NIKILUS in a 2 minute gruesome novice's Challenge fight.
MORNING STAR GLORY overpowered GABRELLA IMBRO in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge fight.
SWIVEL SWEEPER unbelievably bested DARTH SCION in a 7 minute Challenge conflict.
VALAMOND JR. was devastated by DARTH TIMMY in a 1 minute mismatched bout.
XAVIER was handily defeated by EVIL WEEVIL in a 1 minute uneven fight.
REVEN was luckily beaten by DEATH WISH in a action packed 2 minute gruesome struggle.
MARTAVIUS was savagely defeated by DARTH PLAGWEIS in a crowd pleasing 2 minute brawl.
AEROBED was defeated by DARTH SIDIUS in a exciting 2 minute bout.
GINSU CLASSIC overpowered CAPTURED ORC in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
PROSTITUTE savagely defeated CHICKS DIG 'EM in a crowd pleasing 1 minute conflict.
IXION overpowered MORDANT DESERTER in a 2 minute uneven fight.
MR. BIG BAD was savagely defeated by BARBAROSA in a 10 minute beginner's bout.
ELDA GORISH was viciously butchered by BLUE in a 2 minute gory novice's bout.
DOMINATRIX was defeated by GREEN in a 1 minute novice's duel.
ROBERT THE BRUCE luckily beat YELLOW in a popular 7 minute brutal novice's duel.
PURPLE was slaughtered by THE SMITER in a 1 minute uneven bout.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|STRIKING ATTACK                  8         PARRY-LUNGE       13 -   5 -  0      72  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   8         LUNGING ATTACK    54 -  35 -  4      61  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      7         AIMED BLOW        17 -  13 -  2      57  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   6         WALL OF STEEL     19 -  17 -  0      53  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  5         TOTAL PARRY       23 -  22 -  2      51  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    4         STRIKING ATTACK   29 -  35 -  2      45  |
|AIMED BLOW                       4         SLASHING ATTACK   31 -  39 -  2      44  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    3         BASHING ATTACK    16 -  21 -  2      43  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      2         PARRY-RIPOSTE      3 -  18 -  0      14  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     0         PARRY-STRIKE       0 -   0 -  0       0  |

Turn 397 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-LUNGE        2 -  0     SLASHING ATTACK    2 -  3         4  STRIKING ATTACK
STRIKING ATTACK    6 -  2     LUNGING ATTACK     3 -  5         2  LUNGING ATTACK 
WALL OF STEEL      3 -  1     BASHING ATTACK     2 -  4         2  SLASHING ATTACK
TOTAL PARRY        4 -  3     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  0         1  TOTAL PARRY    
AIMED BLOW         2 -  2     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  3         1  BASHING ATTACK 
                                                                1  WALL OF STEEL  

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
STRIKING ATTACK  EURO SHARK 4052            13   6  0  115 AS SEEN ON TV (361)
TOTAL PARRY      JEFFRO 3410                30  19  0  115 RIO VISTANS (348)
LUNGING ATTACK   T.R. 4249                  12   5  0   92 RIO VISTANS (348)
AIMED BLOW       CHIA EDEL 4219             18  15  0   69 MIDDLE WAY 10 (420)
BASHING ATTACK   DARTH PLAGWEIS 4317         4   3  1   54 RANDOM SITH (438)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is ERFIN GORAM 4220.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was GREAT WEAPON CHOICE 4276.  The ten other most popular fighters were DARTH 

The least popular fighter this week was MR. BIG BAD 3943.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were BARBAROSA 4360, SWIVEL SWEEPER 4366, ROBERT THE BRUCE 4359, 
XAVIER 3265, and VALAMOND JR. 3298.