DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER

Date   : 02/25/2020    Duedate: 03/09/2020

AMEN-TEI ARENA

DM-63    TURN-725

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

JERK
EXCLAMATION! (350)
(63-3426) [23-10-2,99]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

JERK                           RHO TELESCOPII
EXCLAMATION! (350)             TELESCOPIUM (374)
(63-3426) [23-10-2,99]         (63-3447) [4-1-0,47]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

JERK                           PICKLES AND ONIONS
EXCLAMATION! (350)             WAYFARERS (248)
(63-3426) [23-10-2,99]         (63-3453) [7-14-1,52]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

BAD ATTIFOOD (376)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. BAD ATTIFOOD (376)          32
2. TELESCOPIUM (374)           22      EXCLAMATION! (350)
3. SATAN'S SAINTS (377)        17      Unchartered Team
4. WAYFARERS (248)              4
5. EXCLAMATION! (350)          -6      BAD ATTIFOOD (376)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 1*BAD ATTIFOOD (376)         6   0  0  100   1/ 3*BAD ATTIFOOD (376)        6  0 0
 2/ 2 EXCLAMATION! (350)       263 123 17 68.1   2/ 2 WAYFARERS (248)           6  6 0
 3/ 6*SATAN'S SAINTS (377)       1   1  1 50.0   3/ 1 EXCLAMATION! (350)        6  6 0
 4/ 3 WAYFARERS (248)          %1073 %1174 23 47.8   4/ 4*TELESCOPIUM (374)         2  5 0
 5/ 4 WORLD BLADES (331)         9  13  1 40.9   5/ 6*SATAN'S SAINTS (377)      1  1 1
 6/ 5*TELESCOPIUM (374)          4   6  0 40.0   6/ 5 WORLD BLADES (331)        1  2 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

     Yeah, I keep  winnin', and I keep payin' somebody to write a DM Column for me. 
Why should I pay? Duelmasters should get free secretarial privileges. (Of all types! 
Hah!)
     So I will say this, Get Me Outta Here! I want and deserve to graduate. (Or at 
least get me a cute, long-legged, kinda busty, blonde secretary.)

                                          -- Jerk, DMV

                                      SPY REPORT

     It's me, The Unknown Spymaster, back to give you this week's Spy Report.  Sit 
back in your seats and we'll have more fun than a barrel of Zontanis.  We now have a 
new top team for all of you guys to dogpile on.  BAD ATTIFOOD now holds the crown and 
they are betting they can keep it.  Hey everybody, watch out for RHO TELESCOPII, who 
flew up 22 points in the rankings after mashing SHUCKS like a melon.  Keep your eye 
on this gal.  And falling like a basher in the top ten was SHUCKS, who dropped 20 
points after a disappointing (to say the least) bout with RHO TELESCOPII.  Our 
battling duelmaster JERK has managed to hold the title, fending off M. CHARDINEE's 
none too subtle advances.  Better luck next time, AMEN-TEI.  4 out of 5 gladiators 
surveyed protect the body, so try and avoid aiming at that location.   
     Here is other news that is of note.  Here's a song for you:  Who's afraid of the 
big, bad WAYFARERS?  Big bad WAYFARERS.  Big bad WAYFARERS.  AMEN-TEI's afraid of the 
big bad WAYFARERS.  Tra la la la la!  For those of you who like math, try this one:  
WAYFARERS + Weapons That go Boom = EXCLAMATION! + Avoid City.  Well just about 
everybody wants a piece of PICKLES AND ONIONS, who was this week's most challenged 
warrior.  OOPS of EXCLAMATION! had better have a good reason for challenging down 12 
points in a challenge which he won.  I thought OOPS showed great skill and promise 
when he beat POOR STRANGER.  All right, so I slept through it!  Big deal!   
     Death is kind of like a new puppy:  he's always around wanting to play.  (Ha 
Zontani, how's that for a wise saying?).  Here's some advice:  warriors with little 
wit and will may encounter problems on the trail to the Isle.   
     Well, that wasn't too bad; Alarond told me that the people in AMEN-TEI have no 
sense of humor.  Or maybe that they were senseless.  C'mon, Leadfoot, let's make some 
tracks.  See ya next time I'm on this circuit!-- The Unknown Spymaster  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 JERK 3426                    23  10  2    99       EXCLAMATION! (350)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 OOPS 3466                     8   0  1    88       EXCLAMATION! (350)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 POOR STRANGER 3464            8   5  0    62       WAYFARERS (248)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 BARRETT INCH 3455             9   5  0    56       WAYFARERS (248)
 PICKLES AND ONIONS 3453       7  14  1    52       WAYFARERS (248)
 RHO TELESCOPII 3447           4   1  0    47       TELESCOPIUM (374)
 CLOUD SHADOW 3467             8   2  1    42       WAYFARERS (248)
 PSHAW 3451                   11   7  0    40       EXCLAMATION! (350)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 JALAPENO BUSINESS 3473        2   0  0    30       BAD ATTIFOOD (376)
 JOHN BOSCO 3477               1   1  1    28       SATAN'S SAINTS (377)
 SHUCKS 3469                   3   4  0    27       EXCLAMATION! (350)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SUPERIOR 3128                 2   3  0    21       WORLD BLADES (331)
 KINDA A BIG DILL 3475         2   0  0    18       BAD ATTIFOOD (376)
 IT'S NACHO CHEESE 3474        2   0  0    17       BAD ATTIFOOD (376)
 HELP 3470                     0   3  0     3       EXCLAMATION! (350)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                W  L K TEAM NAME            SLAIN BY              TURN Revenge?
CULT MEMBER             0  0 0                      JOHN BOSCO 3477       725  NONE

                                     PERSONAL ADS

3-1?! Dang you, Kinda Big Dill! Dang you! -- Loudmouth

M. Chardinee, you are my fave NPC. Why? Cuz I'm 2-0 against you. Har, har. -- Jerk

Rho I'd say "shucks" about our fight, but I'd rather say what I feel "yippee!". 
Besides, I hate you greek-latins. -- Shucks

Kind A Big Dill, you got me in a pickle early, you cucumber! -- Help

Barrett Inch, give me a mile and I'll take an Inch. -- Oops

Loud and clear. Exclamation cheers. -- Loudmouth

Oops -- I'm glad it wasn't a fatal oops for either of us. -- Barrett Inch

That orc will think twice before he comes visiting again. -- Poor Stranger

People who go around grinning all the time make me suspicious. -- Cloud Shadow

Superior -- You need a fork, not a blade to deal with me. -- Pickles and Onions

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

OOPS devastated POOR STRANGER in a 1 minute gruesome mismatched Challenge fight.
PSHAW was savagely defeated by PICKLES AND ONIONS in a 7 minute Challenge melee.
JALAPENO BUSINESS vanquished SUPERIOR in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge brawl.
HELP was defeated by IT'S NACHO CHEESE in a exciting 1 minute Challenge fight.
JERK devastated M. CHARDINEE in a 2 minute gory uneven Title brawl.
BARRETT INCH was devastated by KUNG-FU MASTER in a 1 minute mismatched match.
SHUCKS was handily defeated by RHO TELESCOPII in a 1 minute uneven melee.
CLOUD SHADOW won victory over HAPPY PEASANT in a 5 minute duel.
JOHN BOSCO assassinated CULT MEMBER in a 1 minute uneven duel.
KINDA A BIG DILL overpowered POLITE BEGGAR in a 2 minute one-sided fight.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|STRIKING ATTACK                  6         WALL OF STEEL      2 -   0 -  0     100  |
|AIMED BLOW                       3         SLASHING ATTACK    1 -   0 -  0     100  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   2         BASHING ATTACK     8 -   0 -  0     100  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     1         STRIKING ATTACK   26 -  21 -  1      55  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   1         AIMED BLOW        11 -  10 -  0      52  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    1         PARRY-STRIKE       7 -   7 -  1      50  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      1         LUNGING ATTACK     3 -   3 -  1      50  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      0         TOTAL PARRY        3 -   5 -  0      38  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    0         PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -   0 -  0       0  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  0         PARRY-LUNGE        0 -   0 -  0       0  |

Turn 725 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-STRIKE       1 -  0     STRIKING ATTACK    2 -  4         5  STRIKING ATTACK
LUNGING ATTACK     2 -  0     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  0         2  LUNGING ATTACK 
BASHING ATTACK     1 -  0     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  0         1  AIMED BLOW     
WALL OF STEEL      1 -  0     SLASHING ATTACK    0 -  0         1  BASHING ATTACK 
AIMED BLOW         2 -  1     TOTAL PARRY        0 -  1         1  PARRY-STRIKE   
                                                                1  TOTAL PARRY    

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
AIMED BLOW       JERK 3426                  23  10  2   99 EXCLAMATION! (350)
BASHING ATTACK   OOPS 3466                   8   0  1   88 EXCLAMATION! (350)
STRIKING ATTACK  POOR STRANGER 3464          8   5  0   62 WAYFARERS (248)
TOTAL PARRY      PSHAW 3451                 11   7  0   40 EXCLAMATION! (350)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is JERK 3426.  The most popular warrior this turn was 
PICKLES AND ONIONS 3453.  The ten other most popular fighters were JERK 3426, RHO 
TELESCOPII 3447, JOHN BOSCO 3477, OOPS 3466, JALAPENO BUSINESS 3473, HELP 3470, IT'S 
NACHO CHEESE 3474, POOR STRANGER 3464, BARRETT INCH 3455, and KINDA A BIG DILL 3475.

The least popular fighter this week was PSHAW 3451.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were CLOUD SHADOW 3467, SHUCKS 3469, SUPERIOR 3128, KINDA A BIG DILL 3475, 
BARRETT INCH 3455, POOR STRANGER 3464, IT'S NACHO CHEESE 3474, HELP 3470, JALAPENO 
BUSINESS 3473, and OOPS 3466.

                                NAME CHANGE-O-RAMA

     Algernon, who had NOT gotten the name change he'd asked for, looked at the latest 
petitioner.  This was a typical gladiator, big, muscular, and scarred, with a frown.  
"Ah, what can I do for you?"
     "Name change.  I heard we can do that.  I'm tired of being Jane Doe."
     "I'd think you would be," Algernon said faintly.  "The Commission has actually 
been thinking about this.  It isn't FREE, mind you!  It takes money to run our office, 
you know, and we want to buy some goats--"
     "I don't care about goats!"  He made a crude suggestion about goats.
     "Gladiators, teams, it will cost you two dollars to make a change--"
     "I had a talk with my manager.  He'll find the money.  I want to change my name 
to Jane Ralph.  I'm no doe!"  He thumped a fist on the counter.
     "Er, yes.  Jane Ralph.  Fill out this form, please."  He pushed the paper across 
the counter.  "The changes start on the 15th of April--that's the Ides, you know, and 
can be submitted through the end of May.  With the payment.  No change without the 
goat, ah, the gold."

                                  *   *   *   *   *  

     Warrior and team name changes will be accepted beginning April 15 and continuing 
throughout the month of May.  The cost will be $2 per name change.  All proceeds will 
be used to buy goats via Heifer International and will be matched up to $500.  
If you have names you want to change, please contact Customer Service. -- RSI