Date   : 03/02/2005    Duedate: 03/15/2005


DM-65    TURN-337

This Weeks Top Honors


(65-6605) [9-2-1,72]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

SAND DANCERS (233)             CUBICLE CRUSADERS (714)
(65-6605) [9-2-1,72]           (65-6587) [3-1-0,47]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

REFUGEES (377)                 REFUGEES (377)
(65-6554) [14-19-1,67]         (65-6596) [8-7-1,54]



Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. REFUGEES (377)              21
2. CUBICLE CRUSADERS (714)     15      REFUGEES (377)
3. LINCOLNSHIRE (698)           0      Unchartered Team
4. SAND DANCERS (233)          -7
                                       CUBICLE CRUSADERS (714)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 2*CUBICLE CRUSADERS (714)    3   1  0 75.0   1/ 1 SAND DANCERS (233)       11  4 0
 2/ 6 REFUGEES (377)           350 416 12 45.7   2/ 2 REFUGEES (377)            8  4 1
 3/ 7 SAND DANCERS (233)       667 813 14 45.1   3/ 7*CUBICLE CRUSADERS (714)   2  0 0
 4- 9*LINCOLNSHIRE (698)         2   3  0 40.0   4- 6*LINCOLNSHIRE (698)        1  0 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                        *--=== LIRITH KAI REGIONAL NEWS ===--*

 DM  65 DAL SHANG (turn 336): LORGAN TEN VARN of SAND DANCERS (Lani, mgr.)
 DM  75 JADE MOUNTAIN (turn 304): WOODY of SAND DANCERS (Lorana, mgr.)
 DM  78 LIN TIRIAN (turn 291): BLONDE BILLIE of SAND DANCERS (Jorja, mgr.)
                              (Talon Warsmith, mgr.)

                                      Top Teams
 DM  65 DAL SHANG (turn 336): SAND DANCERS (Lani, mgr.)
 DM  74 CHAVEZ RAVINE (turn 309): SAND DANCERS (Olinda, mgr.)
 DM  75 JADE MOUNTAIN (turn 304): DARK TOADS (TigToad, mgr.)
 DM  78 LIN TIRIAN (turn 291): SAND DANCERS (Jorja, mgr.)
ADM 107 LIRIN KIV (turn 268): PARANOIA, etc. (Jekyll, mgr.)

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

     Same as last time, except that a different single other (non-Sand Dancer, non-
Refugee) warrior is active.

                                   Lorgan ten Varn
                                 Duel2Dude by Default

                                      SPY REPORT

     I was going on vacation, see?  Surf, sun...  But what do those bums say?  "Hit 
the road, Debby Tonte.  DAL SHANG needs a spyreport."  Oh, well.  The guys at CUBICLE 
CRUSADERS like really pulled together to get a 1-0-0 this turn, moving up by 4.  MVP 
award for GOBARL?  REFUGEES' proud of him after beating MIM YELLOWHAIR and getting 16 
points.  Talk about yer big time losers!  JERI TAVAN got smashed by DILBERT, and lost 
11 points!  Our Duelmaster has lost, folks, lost to MASTER OF THE EDGE, BUT LORGAN 
TEN VARN is still the Duelmaster because he has the most recognition points!  I hear 
the top team insists all their warriors get nine hours sleep.  They want photogenic 
fighters for PR photos.   
     AAARRGH!!!  I HATE SPYREPORTING!!!  Sorry.  I just had to say it.  MARVELOUS 
BASTARDS was the most avoided team.  Is a 71-50-9 record really that scary?  Is there 
some deep dark secret why CUBICLE CRUSADERS' been avoiding MARVELOUS BASTARDS so 
much?  Or is it just that they're too scared?  Like, is JERI TAVAN popular, or what?  
She was challenged the most in all of DAL SHANG!  She's got a 3-1-0, is that good?   
     Man, all these warriors dying and killing each other!  Don't you guys ever give 
it a break?  Hey you guys, don't you think your families would like to hear from you? 
Write!  (Or have someone write for you.)  
     Remember, blood on a purple robe may stain.  Soak it in cold water, and hand 
wash.  I gotta leave.  DAL SHANG is like such a dump, and you guys smell too much!  I 
had a fun time, see you later-- Debby Tonte  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LORGAN TEN VARN 6605          9   2  1    72       SAND DANCERS (233)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 CHURRO THE SPIKE 6554        14  19  1    67       REFUGEES (377)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 DAKORIL 6596                  8   7  1    54       REFUGEES (377)
 TEBAS TEN KOGAN 6598          7   6  0    52       SAND DANCERS (233)
-DEAD PIG 4783                 4   1  0    47       HOWIE'S GIRL (522)
 DILBERT 6587                  3   1  0    47       CUBICLE CRUSADERS (714)
 GOBARL 6604                   6   5  0    42       REFUGEES (377)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 JERI TAVAN 6615               3   1  0    34       SAND DANCERS (233)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 KASSAL TEN DRU 6608           4   2  0    30       SAND DANCERS (233)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 KO LAO-DEN 6614               2   2  0    18       SAND DANCERS (233)
-TWISTED METAL 6600            1   0  0    18       LINCOLNSHIRE (698)
 RAGOLAS 6607                  2   7  1    14       REFUGEES (377)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
LIN-VAO DEN KO 6612    0  1 0 SAND DANCERS 233      AGENT ORANGE 5175     333 NOT REVE

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Twisted Metal -- What do you need with parry skills? -- Ko lao-Den

5 February 2005
On behalf of the ILLUMINATI Confederation of Alliances (The kLk, CHAOS, Inc. and The
Company of Brothers) I would like to express our sympathies concerning the tragic
loss of Rich Hammes to both the DM community and to the real life world.  Surely our
loss has been Heaven's gain. -- Talon Darkhart, deeply sorrowful
                                kLk God of War, Illuminati Alliance, Puppetmaster

1 March 2005
                                    The Contract
                         [as retold by Hammer the WordSmith]
     What had begun as a contract for swords and armor between a well known name in
the DM community and the former VC Captain/WordSmith and WeaponSmith of the Vendetta
Cartel Tarantula Tribe was destined to impact and altar the landscape of the dueling
community for years to come.
     The following is but a condensed retelling of history in the making.

    Hammer continued sipping his tankard of Elven Tonic as the mysterious hooded
figure quietly seated himself across the table from the Veteran Manager whose back
was against the wall; allowing for a subtle, but effective surveillance of the dimly
lit tavern.
     Recent events in both Illis and North Fork/SCOMSS Swamp Arena had stunned the DM
managerial world with the announcement that Hammer had resigned from his position as
a well respected member of the Vendetta Cartel Alliance.
     Those managers and associates closest to Hammer were shocked and dismayed that
there seemed to be NO Rational Explanation for Hammer making such a seemingly
irrational, hasty and extremely illogical decision; by what seemed to be a spur of
the moment reaction following the Declaration of War by Hammer in the DM 47 P-ads.
     This is what stirred the mysterious hooded figure to seek Hammer with a request
that would change the managerial course of both men; ultimately Rocking the
Managerial World of Alastari as a result of the forthcoming decisions reached by the
two Veterans.
     Time passed swiftly as both Veteran Managers discussed how the landscape of the
DM game on the sands of Alastari had changed over the years both in Basic and Tourney
play; producing a new breed of managers who would of necessity band together in an
alliance with a common goal; waging war against antagonists while improving the
managerial skills of each participating member in their glorious quest for DM
     Hammer listened intently as his unexpected guest inquired about the situation in
North Fork/SCOMSS Swamp Arena; revealing his desire to participate in the upcoming
Turf War 4 contest in DM 47 with an alliance that would accept him on a more
permanent basis other than for just fighting together as a TW4 alliance to win fame
and Gift Certs.
     Here was a Veteran Manager, seeking the advice of Hammer regarding an alliance
to join on a permanent basis; plus extending a sword arm of friendship and requesting
that Hammer join him as an alliance mate with those who would welcome their
     The Iron in the Words of Hammer had produced this opportunity as a result of the
recent conflicts witnessed first hand by the manager seated across the table from
Hammer.  This Veteran Manager had been secretly searching and scouting around
Alastari for someone worth his mettle to fight alongside; someone who would know
where to find the perfect gang of rebels who were unafraid of waging war against
     Hammer knew exactly where to look and in a matter of days the two newcomers were
welcomed into the ranks of a group of managers who received them as war waging equals
in an alliance that had joined a Confederation of Alliances for the TW4 contest.
     Fighting under the banner of The Illuminati Confederation of Alliances alongside
members of Chaos Inc, kLk and The Company of Brothers during the TW4 was more than
either of the two Veteran Managers had envisioned a few months ago.
     Hammer was now entering a new journey with a new attitude.
     Perhaps you readers may have noticed that new attitude by now since this
announcement by Hammer is uncharacteristically Exclamation Point Free.
     Except for the famous quote by Hammer at the end of this announcement.
     Now that Hammer and the Mysterious Hooded Figure have agreed to join forces with
an alliance whose members have welcomed them enthusiastically; let those who desire
to be antagonistic be forewarned as to the identities of these newly welcomed wagers
of war:

kLk Bringer of Pain

kLk WordSmith and WeaponSmith
Minister of War
Illuminati Idealist

     "May Your Blades Be Sharp and Your Wits Sharper!"

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

DILBERT bested JERI TAVAN in a 1 minute Challenge fight.
LORGAN TEN VARN was bested by MASTER OF THE EDGE in a 2 minute Title duel.
CHURRO THE SPIKE demolished SAGAT OF PAIDAN in a 1 minute one-sided melee.
DAKORIL savagely defeated DENGAN THE TRADER in a crowd pleasing 4 minute bloody duel.
TEBAS TEN KOGAN savagely defeated DENGAN THE TRADER in a 2 minute brutal fight.
GOBARL devastated MIM YELLOWHAIR in a 1 minute uneven brawl.
KASSAL TEN DRU was defeated by MIM YELLOWHAIR in a 2 minute struggle.
RAGOLAS was overpowered by OLTIMAL THE LAME in a 1 minute mismatched brawl.
KO LAO-DEN overpowered BERVAN THE TINKER in a 1 minute uneven melee.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|BASHING ATTACK                   2         TOTAL PARRY        2 -   0 -  0     100  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  2         AIMED BLOW         9 -   3 -  0      75  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      1         STRIKING ATTACK   15 -   6 -  0      71  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     1         LUNGING ATTACK    17 -   8 -  0      68  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   1         PARRY-STRIKE       6 -   4 -  1      60  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  1         BASHING ATTACK    13 -   9 -  0      59  |
|AIMED BLOW                       1         PARRY-LUNGE        9 -   7 -  1      56  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    1         SLASHING ATTACK   14 -  11 -  1      56  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      0         WALL OF STEEL      6 -   8 -  0      43  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    0         PARRY-RIPOSTE      2 -   8 -  1      20  |

Turn 337 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-LUNGE        1 -  0     AIMED BLOW         0 -  1         3  BASHING ATTACK 
PARRY-STRIKE       1 -  0     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  1         2  STRIKING ATTACK
LUNGING ATTACK     1 -  0     STRIKING ATTACK    0 -  2         2  SLASHING ATTACK
SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  0     TOTAL PARRY        0 -  0         1  PARRY-STRIKE   
BASHING ATTACK     2 -  0     WALL OF STEEL      0 -  0         1  PARRY-LUNGE    
                                                                1  LUNGING ATTACK 
                                                                1  AIMED BLOW     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
STRIKING ATTACK  LORGAN TEN VARN 6605        9   2  1   72 SAND DANCERS (233)
PARRY-LUNGE      DAKORIL 6596                8   7  1   54 REFUGEES (377)
SLASHING ATTACK  TEBAS TEN KOGAN 6598        7   6  0   52 SAND DANCERS (233)
LUNGING ATTACK   DILBERT 6587                3   1  0   47 CUBICLE CRUSADERS (714)
BASHING ATTACK   GOBARL 6604                 6   5  0   42 REFUGEES (377)
AIMED BLOW       JERI TAVAN 6615             3   1  0   34 SAND DANCERS (233)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is CHURRO THE SPIKE 6554.  The most popular warrior 
this turn was DAKORIL 6596.  The ten other most popular fighters were DILBERT 6587, 
LAO-DEN 6614, CHURRO THE SPIKE 6554, JERI TAVAN 6615, RAGOLAS 6607, and  0.

The least popular fighter this week was RAGOLAS 6607.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were JERI TAVAN 6615, CHURRO THE SPIKE 6554, KO LAO-DEN 6614, LORGAN TEN 
DAKORIL 6596, and  0.