DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER

Date   : 07/21/2016    Duedate: 08/17/2016

DRAGONHEAD ARENA

DM-72    TURN-303

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

TURBULENT BILLIARDS
BAD COMBOS (689)
(72-6306) [13-2-0,136]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

TURBULENT BILLIARDS            FORMS
BAD COMBOS (689)               BASH BROS DMV (924)
(72-6306) [13-2-0,136]         (72-7540) [6-2-0,93]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

GENE AUTRY                     DOG DAYS OF SUMMER
COWBOY CROONERS (981)          MONGREL HORDE (680)
(72-7838) [16-26-3,94]         (72-9191) [3-4-2,33]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

BASH BROS REMOTE (960)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. NL CENTRAL (783)            45
2. BAD COMBOS (689)            36      B B TECH SUPPORT (733)
3. BASH BROS ROADSIDE (788)    34      Unchartered Team
4. BASH BROS NEWS (951)        29
5. FEAR FACTORY 2 (1117)       27BASH BROS FISHERMAN (976)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 2*BASH BROS FISHERMA (976)   9   0  0  100   1/ 1*BASH BROS REMOTE (960)   10  5 0
 2/ 4*BB JUNK EMAIL (972)        8   0  1  100   2/ 2*BASH BROS SNOW (1014)     9  5 0
 3/ 3*BASH BROS CANDLE (1023)    8   0  0  100   3/ 4 BASH BROS FIREPLAC (934)  8  0 2
 4/ 7*BASH BROS DISEASE (1031)   2   0  0  100   4/ 3 BASH BROS BASEBALL (738)  7  2 0
 5/ 6*BASH BROS CLOSET (947)     2   0  0  100   5/17*BB JUNK EMAIL (972)       6  0 1
 6- 5*EAT THIS! (1244)           1   0  0  100   6/18*BASH BROS FISHERMA (976)  6  0 0
 7/ 1*BASH BROS MLM (973)       11   1  1 91.7   7/ 5*BASH BROS MARRIAGE (881)  6  3 1
 8/ 0 B B TECH SUPPORT (733)    21   2  4 91.3   8/ 6*BASH BROS LIGHTS (1021)   6  3 0
 9/10 BB REALITY SHOW (824)     16   2  1 88.9   9/11 BASH BROS BUS (821)       5  0 0
10/ 9*BASH BROS CONDO (979)     14   2  1 87.5  10/10*BASH BROS OLYMPIC (1039)  5  1 1
11/14*BASH BROS RENTAL C (826)   7   1  1 87.5  11/15*BASH BROS MLM (973)       5  1 1
12/11*BASH BROS MARRIAGE (881)  23   4  2 85.2  12/28 BASH BROS NEWS (951)      5  1 0
13/16*BASH BROS OLYMPIC (1039)  11   2  1 84.6  13/ 8*BASH BROS DMV (924)       5  1 0
14/15 BASH BROS GARDENER (975)  10   2  0 83.3  14/ 7*BASH BROS BEER (966)      5  1 0
15/21*PBS KIDS (920)             5   1  1 83.3  15/31 NL CENTRAL (783)          5  3 0
16/12*BASH BROS BEER (966)      13   3  0 81.3  16/27*BASH BROS RENTAL C (826)  4  0 1
17/19 BASH BROS BUS (821)       29   7  1 80.6  17/25*BASH BROS CANDLE (1023)   4  0 0
18/13*BASH BROS B-MOVIE (1025)  12   3  0 80.0  18/ 9*BASH BROS CONDO (979)     4  2 0

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
19/22 BASH BROS FIREPLAC (934)  30   8  3 78.9  19/20 MEAT YOUR MAKER (656)     4  4 0
20/ 0 PURPLE PLATYPI (659)      18   5  1 78.3  20/22 BASH BROS ROADSIDE (788)  4  5 0
21/24*CUB GREATS (1121)          7   2  0 77.8  21/12 OUTLAWS (643)             4 11 0
22/17*BASH BROS SNOW (1014)     28   9  2 75.7  22/13 BB INFOMERCIAL (969)      3  0 0
23/18*BASH BROS REMOTE (960)    30  10  2 75.0  23/16 BASH BROS TREES (871)     3  0 0
24/23 BASH BROS BASEBALL (738)  30  10  0 75.0  24/ 0 BAD COMBOS (689)          3  0 0
25/28 BASH BROS NEWS (951)      23   8  0 74.2  25/29 BASH BROS LAWYER (730)    3  0 0
26/25 BASH BROS TREES (871)     37  13  1 74.0  26/23 BASH BROS ROAD SI (1275)  3  1 1
27/ 0 RUSSIAN BIRDS (671)       33  12  2 73.3  27/24*BASH BROS GAS (989)       3  1 0
28/ 0 BAD COMBOS (689)          30  11  2 73.2  28/14*BASH BROS NIGHT (1161)    3  1 0
29/27 BB INFOMERCIAL (969)      32  12  1 72.7  29/21 DEADLY RAGE (158)         3  1 0
30/20 BASH BROS DIAPER (793)    16   6  0 72.7  30/33 COWBOY CROONERS (981)     3  3 0
31/26*BASH BROS LIGHTS (1021)   15   6  0 71.4  31/34 BASH BROS TRAIN (803)     3  3 0
32/29 BASH BROS LAWYER (730)    54  23  2 70.1  32/40 BASH BROS GARDENER (975)  2  0 0
33/31 MEAT YOUR MAKER (656)    122  63  6 65.9  33/37*BASH BROS CLOSET (947)    2  0 0
34-33 MORE VODKA (694)          15   8  1 65.2  34/38*BASH BROS DISEASE (1031)  2  0 0
35-34 MILK IS GOOD (650)        37  20  1 64.9  35/39*CUB GREATS (1121)         2  0 0
36/35 BASH BROS ROADSIDE (788)  22  12  0 64.7  36/43 BB REALITY SHOW (824)     2  0 0
37/38*BASH BROS NIGHT (1161)     9   5  0 64.3  37/19 BB SIDE MIRROR (1000)     2  1 0
38/30 BASH BROS FRUIT (997)      9   5  0 64.3  38/30 BASH BROS TIRES (796)     2  1 0
39/37 BASH BROS TIRES (796)     47  28  2 62.7  39/48*BASH BROS B-MOVIE (1025)  2  2 0
40/ 0 MONGREL HORDE (680)       58  36  7 61.7  40/26 BASH BROS DIAPER (793)    2  2 0
41/36*BASH BROS GAS (989)        8   5  1 61.5  41/ 0 B B TECH SUPPORT (733)    1  0 1
42/39 BASH BROS TRAIN (803)     15  10  0 60.0  42-44 MILK IS GOOD (650)        1  0 1
43/40*BASH BROS DMV (924)       12   9  0 57.1  43/ 0*FEAR FACTORY (1118)       1  0 0
44/41 DEADLY RAGE (158)        166 127  9 56.7  44/ 0*FEAR FACTORY 7 (1144)     1  0 0
45/42 NL CENTRAL (783)          47  38  0 55.3  45-41*EAT THIS! (1244)          1  0 0
46/43 BASH BROS ROAD SI (1275)  42  38  2 52.5  46/52 ONE LETTER OFF (917)      1  1 0
47-44 SPACE ACTION 99 (418)    100  95  8 51.3  47/53*PBS KIDS (920)            1  1 0
48/57*FEAR FACTORY 13 (1150)     1   1  0 50.0  48/54*FEAR FACTORY 13 (1150)    1  1 0
49/48 ON MY BOOKSHELF (1126)    41  57  2 41.8  49/ 0*FEAR FACTORY 2 (1117)     1  1 0
50/49 DYNASTY WARRIORS (1140)   50  75  2 40.0  50/ 0 PURPLE PLATYPI (659)      1  1 0
51/47 BB SIDE MIRROR (1000)      4   6  0 40.0  51/50 BASH BROS FRUIT (997)     1  2 0
52/53 ONE LETTER OFF (917)       5   8  0 38.5  52/36 DYNASTY WARRIORS (1140)   1  2 0
53/50 COWBOY CROONERS (981)     48  77  3 38.4  53/ 0 RUSSIAN BIRDS (671)       1  2 0
54/51 VAR'S FAV BARS (1127)     24  43  1 35.8  54/32 ON MY BOOKSHELF (1126)    1  5 0
55/52 OUTLAWS (643)             68 128  8 34.7  55/51 VAR'S FAV BARS (1127)     0  7 0
56/ 0*FEAR FACTORY 2 (1117)      2   4  0 33.3  56/49 FEAR FACTORY 16 (1153)    0  3 0
57/45*FEAR FACTORY 9 (1146)      1   2  0 33.3  57/46*FEAR FACTORY 9 (1146)     0  2 0
58/46*FEAR FACTORY 19 (1211)     1   2  0 33.3  58/47*FEAR FACTORY 19 (1211)    0  2 0
59-54 MY CARTOONS (1128)        22  48  0 31.4  59/ 0 MONGREL HORDE (680)       0  2 0
60/ 0*FEAR FACTORY 3 (1116)      2   5  0 28.6  60-45 MY CARTOONS (1128)        0  1 0
61/55 FEAR FACTORY 16 (1153)     3  10  0 23.1  61-55*SELLSWORDS VII (1046)     0  1 0
62/ 0*FEAR FACTORY (1118)        2   9  0 18.2  62/ 0*FEAR FACTORY 18 (1212)    0  1 0
63/ 0*FEAR FACTORY 7 (1144)      1   5  0 16.7  63/ 0*FEAR FACTORY 3 (1116)     0  1 0
64/ 0*FEAR FACTORY 18 (1212)     0   1  0  0.0  64-57 MORE VODKA (694)          0  1 0
65-56*SELLSWORDS VII (1046)      0   1  0  0.0  65-56 SPACE ACTION 99 (418)     0  1 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

Did you know there is something worse than a late bus?  Several, actually, but the one 
I'm going to talk about today is an early bus.

It isn't 'supposed' to happen, but drivers sometimes ignore the rules and blow past 
stations leaving before their scheduled stop time.  The best thing you can do for 
yourself is to report these drivers and get them reprimanded, but that doesn't help 
you when you missed the bus because of something that shouldn't have happened.  
Hopefully you have another bus you can catch, but there are situations where that 
doesn't happen.

The Commission is also unpredictable in giving early invites to ADM.  Therefore, I 
will be doing my last turns of prep in a very slow manner, just in case the Commission 
gives me that early invite.  Assur does want to run me in Champions...

                                          -- Late

                                      SPY REPORT

     So why do I have this bag over my head?  Because I am The Unknown Spymaster and 
I'm going to give you a spy report!.  Take a look at BB JUNK EMAIL's act, as they 
have a 3-0-1 week and gain 12 places in the team ranking.  Rising in the ranks like a 
loaf of armored bread (okay, I admit it's corny) is BASH BROS FISHERMAN, who swept up 
12 places in the ranks.  Take a look at BASH BROS NEWS' act, as they have a 3-0-0 
week and gain 16 places in the team ranking.  Rising in the ranks like a loaf of 
armored bread (okay, I admit it's corny) is NL CENTRAL, who swept up 16 places in the 
ranks.  Take a look at BASH BROS RENTAL CAR's act, as they have a 2-0-1 week and gain 
11 places in the team ranking.  Suffering under a 1-0-0 record and dropping from 14th 
to 28th place were the BASH BROS NIGHT.  Keep trying!  A seasoned team is steady in 
the lists.  But to BB SIDE MIRROR, which fell to 37th, it's what you soak in before 
going to the Dark Arena.  What goes up, must come down.  Watch out DRAGONHEAD!  BASH 
BROS DIAPER may fall on you as it crushes past the teams below it to fall on the 40th 
spot.  Suffering under a 0-2-0 record and dropping from 36th to 52nd place were the 
DYNASTY WARRIORS.  Keep trying!  A seasoned team is steady in the lists.  But to ON 
MY BOOKSHELF, which fell to 54th, it's what you soak in before going to the Dark 
Arena.  What goes up, must come down.  Watch out DRAGONHEAD!  FEAR FACTORY 9 may fall 
on you as it crushes past the teams below it to fall on the 57th spot.  Suffering 
under a 0-1-0 record and dropping from 47th to 58th place were the FEAR FACTORY 19.  
Keep trying!  It looks like the guys(?) at BASH BROS FIREPLACE had a good week as 
they went 3-0-1 to put them in 3rd place.  I guess steroids help!  Hey everybody, 
watch out for DERAILED, who flew up 23 points in the rankings after mashing ARAMIS 
RAMIREZ like a melon.  Keep your eye on this guy.  And falling like a basher in the 
top ten was OYAMI, who dropped 16 points after a disappointing (to say the least) 
bout with POTTY BREAK.  Well, if ya don't shows up at the laundromat, ya can'ts wash 
yer clothes.  LATE did not fight this week so his title was forfeit.  In front of all 
the crowds, TURBULENT BILLIARDS took the Duelmaster's crown for its own.  I give the 
bum two weeks.  4 out of 5 gladiators surveyed protect the body, so try and avoid 
aiming at that location.   
     Here is other news that is of note.  Did you hear that NL CENTRAL was most 
avoided team this week?  Well, knowing the personal hygiene of NL CENTRAL's warriors, 
I'm not surprised!  And you guys like to boo me?  Well, unsling your rasberries, 
cause BASH BROS TREES beats feet every time NL CENTRAL smiles at them.  Try farming, 
eh?  And who is this LOCKE you ask, with 26 points and a 4-3-0 record.  Ooh, the 
tales I could tell!   
     Death is kind of like a new puppy:  he's always around wanting to play.  (Ha 
Zontani, how's that for a wise saying?).  CLOGGED CHIMNEY defied all odds and slew 
MOUNTAIN TROLL in the Dark Arena.  The only ones displeased were the buzzards, as 
MOUNTAIN TROLL's meat is notoriously tough.  It's not often when you see a 9-4-0 
warrior like MIKE TROUT kick the bucket.  I wonder if MEAT YOUR MAKER will recover 
from the blow.  Ask not the elves for counsel, for they will say both yes and no.  
Silly buggers, eh?   
     Well, there's the manager of the DRAGONHEAD giving me the 'cut' sign (or is that 
'They're going to strangle you in the alley?).  Okay, so I may not be the world's 
best comedian, but then you guys aren't the world's best warriors.  Its been real, 
and its been fun, but it hasn't been real fun...-- The Unknown Spymaster  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 TURBULENT BILLIARDS 6306     13   2  0   136       BAD COMBOS (689)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 CUB 6810                     10   9  0   123       NL CENTRAL (783)
 BASES LOADED WALK 6582       11   1  0   122       BASH BROS BASEBALL (738)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 REPETITIVE 7684              13   3  0   120       BASH BROS NEWS (951)
-TIM SALMON 6290              12   4  0   120       MEAT YOUR MAKER (656)
 UNREALITY 7016               12   0  0   117       BB REALITY SHOW (824)
 ESL 6558                     17   1  1   114       B B TECH SUPPORT (733)
-UNDERDOG 6250                15   3  0   110       MONGREL HORDE (680)
 FAKE SALE PRICE 7775         14   2  0   110       BB INFOMERCIAL (969)
-LATE 7002                    15   1  0   109       BASH BROS BUS (821)
 DERAILED 6912                13   3  0   109       BASH BROS TRAIN (803)
 ASTRO 6805                   12   4  0   108       NL CENTRAL (783)
 DEAD PLANTS 8159             10   1  0   106       BASH BROS GARDENER (975)
 OVERGROWN 7263               20   9  0   105       BASH BROS TREES (871)
 RUDE DRIVER 7001             14   3  1   104       BASH BROS BUS (821)
 TRASH 6840                    9   1  0    98       BASH BROS ROADSIDE (788)
 PAY PER SECOND 6542          20  11  0    97       BASH BROS LAWYER (730)
 FIRE WON'T START 7590        10   4  1    97       BASH BROS FIREPLACE (934)
-GOLGO 13 3689                16  22  1    95       SPACE ACTION 99 (418)
 CHICKEN S#!^ 5952            20  20  0    94       MEAT YOUR MAKER (656)
 GENE AUTRY 7838              16  26  3    94       COWBOY CROONERS (981)
 PIRATE 6806                  12   7  0    94       NL CENTRAL (783)
 BADGER 6121                  12   3  1    93       RUSSIAN BIRDS (671)
 FORMS 7540                    6   2  0    93       BASH BROS DMV (924)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-SNOOP DOGGY DOGG 6245        12   7  1    90       MONGREL HORDE (680)
 DEADHOUSE GATES 8677         15  17  1    87       ON MY BOOKSHELF (1126)
-TWO FOR ONE 7777              8   0  1    87       BB INFOMERCIAL (969)
 ARAMIS RAMIREZ 5967          14   3  0    86       PURPLE PLATYPI (659)
 MR RIGHT HANDED 6876         20  20  1    84       BASH BROS TIRES (796)
 COPYCAT 5854                 15  20  1    84       OUTLAWS (643)
 STINKY 6864                   9   3  0    84       BASH BROS DIAPER (793)
 4 HOUR GAMES 6579            10   4  0    83       BASH BROS BASEBALL (738)
 NOISY NEIGHBOR 7828           8   0  0    81       BASH BROS CONDO (979)
 CLEANING 7588                10   2  0    78       BASH BROS FIREPLACE (934)
 FULCRUM 6122                 15   4  0    77       RUSSIAN BIRDS (671)
-TOP DOG 6249                 11   8  0    77       MONGREL HORDE (680)
 STEROID GAMES 6309            7   4  1    77       BAD COMBOS (689)
 LAWN DART CATCHING 6308       9   3  1    76       BAD COMBOS (689)
 SENSATIONALIZED 7683          8   5  0    74       BASH BROS NEWS (951)
 ARRANGED 7312                 8   1  2    71       BASH BROS MARRIAGE (881)
 BAD SPECIAL EFFECTS 8069      6   1  0    71       BASH BROS B-MOVIES (1025)
 ROY ROGERS 7836              14  28  0    70       COWBOY CROONERS (981)
 SHOVELING 8014                8   1  1    69       BASH BROS SNOW (1014)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 CONVENIENCE 7310              8   1  0    66       BASH BROS MARRIAGE (881)
 KEVIN BACON 8675              5   1  0    66       MEAT YOUR MAKER (656)
 ERNIE BANKS 8648              7   2  0    65       CUB GREATS (1121)
 LOST IN COUCH 7734            7   2  1    64       BASH BROS REMOTE (960)
 XIAHOU DUN 8784               7  13  0    62       DYNASTY WARRIORS (1140)
 TAX PENALTY 7311              7   2  0    62       BASH BROS MARRIAGE (881)
 ANNOYING ANNOUNCERS 8154      6   0  1    59       BASH BROS OLYMPICS (1039)
-GORGOLLA 4146                 9  11  0    58       SPACE ACTION 99 (418)
 PUT ON CHAINS 8013            4   2  0    57       BASH BROS SNOW (1014)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LITHIUM 8234                  8  12  0    56       DEADLY RAGE (158)
 NOT THE REAL THING 7762       7   1  0    54       BASH BROS BEER (966)
 POTTY BREAK 6838              7   3  0    54       BASH BROS ROADSIDE (788)
 MELTING FLOOD 8016            6   0  1    54       BASH BROS SNOW (1014)
 DROP AND BREAK 7730           6   2  0    54       BASH BROS REMOTE (960)
 HINT OF SLIME 7503            5   8  0    54       ONE LETTER OFF (917)
 FULL AND HEAVY 6861           7   3  0    52       BASH BROS DIAPER (793)
 FLICKERING 8048               7   0  0    51       BASH BROS LIGHTS (1021)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 WARLOCK 6137                  8  17  2    49       OUTLAWS (643)
 SIX-GUN TAROT 8680            3   1  0    48       ON MY BOOKSHELF (1126)
 PITCH FOR INSURANCE 7029      4   0  0    47       BASH BROS RENTAL CAR (826)
 DANIEL TIGER 7885             4   1  0    46       PBS KIDS (920)
 OUT OF BATTERIES 7732         7   2  1    45       BASH BROS REMOTE (960)
 NOSY NEIGHBOR 7827            6   2  1    45       BASH BROS CONDO (979)
 BEAR 6221                     6   3  1    44       RUSSIAN BIRDS (671)
 OYAMI 8689                    6   7  0    44       VAR'S FAV BARS (1127)
 LESS TASTE 7764               6   2  0    43       BASH BROS BEER (966)
-STUPID CONTESTANT 7018        4   1  1    43       BB REALITY SHOW (824)
 SKIN TICKET 8630              2   3  0    43       FEAR FACTORY (1118)
 BIASED JUDGES 8153            5   2  0    42       BASH BROS OLYMPICS (1039)
 AMWAY 7795                    4   0  1    42       BASH BROS MLM (973)
-JUDAH 4543                    5   8  2    41       SPACE ACTION 99 (418)
 MOLDY 7930                    7   3  0    40       BASH BROS FRUIT (997)
-NOT AS ADVERTISED 7776        6   4  0    39       BB INFOMERCIAL (969)
 NO VISIBILITY 8012            5   4  0    39       BASH BROS SNOW (1014)
 LEAK 7886                     5   1  1    37       BASH BROS GAS (989)
 DIG FOR CAR 8015              5   2  0    37       BASH BROS SNOW (1014)
 SHIFTED 7941                  4   6  0    36       BB SIDE MIRROR (1000)
 HERBALIFE 7796                4   0  0    36       BASH BROS MLM (973)
 419 7794                      3   0  1    36       BB JUNK EMAIL (972)
 OVER AFTER FIRST 6583         9   5  0    34       BASH BROS BASEBALL (738)
 DRUNK 7812                    3   0  0    34       BASH BROS FISHERMAN (976)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 TAKENOUTOFTHEROOM 7731        6   3  0    33       BASH BROS REMOTE (960)
 DOG DAYS OF SUMMER 9191       3   4  2    33       MONGREL HORDE (680)
 BRIGHT 8050                   4   3  0    32       BASH BROS LIGHTS (1021)
 WAX SPILL 8060                4   0  0    32       BASH BROS CANDLE (1023)
 THE BLUE TOAD 8694            3   3  0    31       VAR'S FAV BARS (1127)
 ANDREW JONES 5965             4   1  1    30       PURPLE PLATYPI (659)
 NONSTANDARD 8051              4   3  0    30       BASH BROS LIGHTS (1021)
 DISCOVERY TOYS 7798           3   1  0    29       BASH BROS MLM (973)
 NO CARS AVAILABLE 7026        3   1  1    28       BASH BROS RENTAL CAR (826)
 UNPREPARED 7811               3   0  0    28       BASH BROS FISHERMAN (976)
 CHAIN LETTER 7793             3   0  0    28       BB JUNK EMAIL (972)
-LU SU 8773                    2   1  0    28       DYNASTY WARRIORS (1140)
-KALIBAK 4428                  5   4  0    26       SPACE ACTION 99 (418)
 LOCKE 9363                    4   3  0    26       OUTLAWS (643)
 BUY ME 7791                   2   0  0    26       BB JUNK EMAIL (972)
 HACKED TO PIECES 8847         1   1  0    26       FEAR FACTORY 13 (1150)
 NO BATTERIES 7733             4   1  0    25       BASH BROS REMOTE (960)
 TURNED OFF 7887               3   4  0    25       BASH BROS GAS (989)
 BOOBY TRAP 7665               2   0  0    25       BASH BROS CLOSET (947)
 PRIME CUT 8817                1   1  0    25       FEAR FACTORY 7 (1144)
 NOT NEWS 7687                 2   0  0    24       BASH BROS NEWS (951)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-DISPOSAL FEE 8221             2   0  0    23       BASH BROS TIRES (796)
 DIABETES 8099                 2   0  0    23       BASH BROS DISEASE (1031)
 DARK 8927                     4   2  0    22       BASH BROS NIGHT (1161)
 LETHAL DOSAGE 8862            3   7  0    22       FEAR FACTORY 16 (1153)
 BAD SCRIPT 8068               5   1  0    21       BASH BROS B-MOVIES (1025)
-FIVE MINUTE SPECIAL 7779      4   6  0    21       BB INFOMERCIAL (969)
 FIRE STARTER 8061             4   0  0    21       BASH BROS CANDLE (1023)
-PUNKA 9396                    1   0  0    21       EAT THIS! (1244)
 SHOPPING CART 6836            5   5  0    20       BASH BROS ROADSIDE (788)
 WRONGPLACEWRONGSIGN 9608      4   2  0    20       BASH BROS ROAD SIGN (1275)
 UNREADABLE 9601               2   0  1    20       BASH BROS ROAD SIGN (1275)
-BIG SHOT BEBOP 8235           2   4  0    20       SPACE ACTION 99 (418)
-BUYING INNOCENCE 6543         2   2  0    18       BASH BROS LAWYER (730)
 TRUTH HURTS 8627              1   1  0    18       FEAR FACTORY 2 (1117)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 ETERNAL REST 8626             1   0  0    18       FEAR FACTORY 2 (1117)
 FISH STORY 7813               3   0  0    17       BASH BROS FISHERMAN (976)
 FLASHPOINT 8622               2   1  0    17       FEAR FACTORY 3 (1116)
 MIA HAMM 9358                 1   5  1    17       MEAT YOUR MAKER (656)
 WANG YI 8775                  1   2  0    17       DYNASTY WARRIORS (1140)
-WISE 8191                     0   1  0    17       SELLSWORDS VII (1046)
 LONG LINES 7537               4   4  0    16       BASH BROS DMV (924)
 CARDINAL 8794                 2   4  0    16       NL CENTRAL (783)
-BREWER 9367                   2   2  0    16       NL CENTRAL (783)
 DEPUTY DOG 9435               0   1  0    15       MONGREL HORDE (680)
 TOMMYKNOCKERS 9210            1   7  0    10       VAR'S FAV BARS (1127)
-PRIMUS BASHER 7871            1   0  0    10       BAD COMBOS (689)
 MISSED STOP 8276              2   3  0     9       BASH BROS TRAIN (803)
-ROAD KILL 8272                1   1  0     8       BASH BROS ROADSIDE (788)
-TERRIBLE HOST 7019            0   1  0     7       BB REALITY SHOW (824)
 THE RED SHORE 9180            1   2  0     5       FEAR FACTORY 19 (1211)
 APES OF WRATH 8827            1   2  0     5       FEAR FACTORY 9 (1146)
 YOUR LAST NIGHT 9188          0   1  0     5       FEAR FACTORY 18 (1212)
-NICK JOHNSON 5968             0   1  0     1       PURPLE PLATYPI (659)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                W  L K TEAM NAME            SLAIN BY              TURN Revenge?
CULT MEMBER             0  0 0                      419 7794              303  NONE
MORDANT DESERTER        0  0 0                      NO CARS AVAILABL 7026 303  NONE
THE USEROUS MERC        0  0 0                      ANNOYING ANNOUNC 8154 303  NONE
RUDENESS 7538           2  3 0 BASH BROS DMV 924    THJORGGA 9384         300   
MIKE TROUT 7884         9  4 0 MEAT YOUR MAKER 656  ESL 6558              303   
IVY 9620                0  3 0 OUTLAWS 643          SHEWISH GIANT         303  NONE
NIX 9619                0  3 0 OUTLAWS 643          STONE GOLEM           303  NONE

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Crip -- Welcome back. -- Assur

Warlock -- Took you out. -- Trash

Locke -- Yeah, but until you go to the store, you still can't use the remote.  
BAHAHAHAHA! -- No Batteries

Cub -- Sure, you can say all you want about this being your year, but regular season 
wins don't matter. -- Derailed

Crip -- I certainly won't cry about Major Tom.  Your big ugly strikers give me too 
many losses.  But I certainly wasn't trying.  All my warriors here run the same.  
Attack limbs, 5 KD. -- Assur

Astro -- And because of all those losses, Assur gets pretty excited when one of us 
DOES beat one of Crip's strikers -- Unreality

Mike Trout -- Everything about that fight was unfair.  So therefore I will raise your 
penalty. -- Tax Penalty

Chicken -- Here you go inactive for a half year after losing to me.  I keep training 
and practicing.  When you come back, I lose to you!?!  FOUL! -- Mr Right Handed

Oyami -- Everything about that fight was unfair -- Pay Per Second

Gene Autry -- We need to have a dinosaur graduating party.  SOON! -- Bad Special 
Effects

Pirate -- Stop doing that!  I'm going to lose my status as one of Assur's favorite 
PL's. -- Sensationalized

XD -- Your name is too hard to spell. -- Over After First

Daniel Tiger -- Beating you is only a very small step towards my goal. -- 4 Hour Games

Hint of Slime -- Hilarious.  You can't buy a good matchup, can you? -- Flickering

Lithium -- Are you radioactive? -- Nonstandard

Ernie Banks -- I thought you were dead? -- Dig for Car

Kevin Bacon -- Couldn't hold it any longer? -- Potty Break

Lethal Dosage -- Good thing you don't have leaking batteries, too. -- Out of Batteries

Tommyknockers -- So hard to remember what you are.  I want to think you are something 
far different. -- Assur

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

CLOGGED CHIMNEY butchered MOUNTAIN TROLL in a 2 minute bloody Dark Arena fight.
NIX was slaughtered by STONE GOLEM in a action packed 1 minute Dark Arena battle.
IVY was narrowly killed by SHEWISH GIANT in a crowd pleasing 1 minute Dark Arena duel.
DANIEL TIGER devastated TURNED OFF in a 1 minute brutal one-sided Challenge fight.
CHICKEN S#!^ was viciously subdued by DEAD PLANTS in a 2 minute Challenge brawl.
ASTRO devastated STINKY in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match.
PIRATE handily defeated SHOVELING in a action packed 1 minute uneven Challenge fight.
KEVIN BACON vanquished LESS TASTE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
CONVENIENCE vanquished WARLOCK in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
HINT OF SLIME overpowered BRIGHT in a 1 minute gory uneven Challenge match.
DRUNK outlasted LOCKE in a tiresome 13 minute bloody Challenge match.
CARDINAL was handily defeated by NO BATTERIES in a 1 minute Challenge contest.
MIA HAMM was savagely defeated by DIABETES in a 2 minute gory Challenge brawl.
RUDE DRIVER handily defeated KUNG-FU MASTER in a 1 minute one-sided conflict.
CUB vanquished DEADHOUSE GATES in a action packed 1 minute mismatched bout.
UNREALITY handily defeated VETERAN MERCENARY in a 1 minute mismatched bout.
FAKE SALE PRICE overpowered VENEMOUS CONCUBINE in a exciting 1 minute one-sided bout.
BASES LOADED WALK overpowered BADGER in a 1 minute one-sided match.
ESL easily killed MIKE TROUT in a 1 minute mismatched competition.
REPETITIVE overpowered KUNG-FU MASTER in a exciting 1 minute uneven fight.
OVERGROWN overpowered VETERAN MERCENARY in a 1 minute uneven fray.
TURBULENT BILLIARDS handily defeated COPYCAT in a 1 minute one-sided Title contest.
ARAMIS RAMIREZ was demolished by DERAILED in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
ROY ROGERS was vanquished by SENSATIONALIZED in a 1 minute one-sided match.
GENE AUTRY vanquished PUT ON CHAINS in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
FORMS demolished M. CHARDINEE in a 1 minute one-sided melee.
FULCRUM was vanquished by TRASH in a 1 minute one-sided fray.
ARRANGED was overcome by KUNG-FU MASTER in a 2 minute bout.
FIRE WON'T START handily defeated VETERAN MERCENARY in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
PAY PER SECOND overpowered VETERAN MERCENARY in a action packed 1 minute uneven fight.
4 HOUR GAMES overpowered M. CHARDINEE in a popular 1 minute one-sided match.
DROP AND BREAK was overpowered by STEROID GAMES in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
NOISY NEIGHBOR overcame M. CHARDINEE in a crowd pleasing 2 minute match.
MR RIGHT HANDED viciously subdued KUNG-FU MASTER in a 2 minute mismatched fight.
XIAHOU DUN was devastated by LAWN DART CATCHING in a 1 minute uneven bout.
LOST IN COUCH was defeated by VENEMOUS CONCUBINE in a exciting 1 minute match.
BAD SPECIAL EFFECTS overcame KUNG-FU MASTER in a 2 minute match.
TAX PENALTY viciously subdued CAPTURED ORC in a 1 minute gory bout.
FULL AND HEAVY lost to ERNIE BANKS in a 1 minute bout.
OYAMI was overcome by POTTY BREAK in a 2 minute match.
CLEANING viciously subdued VETERAN MERCENARY in a 2 minute brutal duel.
LITHIUM overpowered BAD SCRIPT in a 1 minute uneven battle.
TAKENOUTOFTHEROOM lost to BEAR in a 2 minute struggle.
OUT OF BATTERIES savagely defeated AMBITIOUS GUARD in a 1 minute conflict.
FLICKERING outlasted DOG DAYS OF SUMMER in a exciting 14 minute bloody brawl.
PITCH FOR INSURANCE viciously subdued CAPTURED ORC in a 2 minute brutal conflict.
NOT THE REAL THING overpowered FRATSFA SLAVE in a 2 minute one-sided fight.
OVER AFTER FIRST was defeated by SIX-GUN TAROT in a 1 minute duel.
MELTING FLOOD savagely defeated THE BLUE TOAD in a action packed 2 minute gory bout.
ANNOYING ANNOUNCERS viciously butchered THE USEROUS MERCHANT in a 1 minute duel.
NO VISIBILITY was unbelievably bested by AMBITIOUS GUARD in a 1 minute brutal bout.
SHIFTED was demolished by DANGEROUS CRIMINAL in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
DISCOVERY TOYS was handily defeated by DANGEROUS CRIMINAL in a 1 minute contest.
MOLDY was overpowered by DANGEROUS CRIMINAL in a 1 minute one-sided struggle.
NOSY NEIGHBOR was narrowly defeated by DANGEROUS CRIMINAL in a popular 1 minute brawl.
LEAK devastated WANG YI in a crowd pleasing 1 minute bloody one-sided match.
SKIN TICKET overpowered WRONGPLACEWRONGSIGN in a crowd pleasing 2 minute uneven bout.
HERBALIFE overpowered LETHAL DOSAGE in a 1 minute mismatched brawl.
AMWAY viciously subdued AMBITIOUS GUARD in a 2 minute brutal bout.
419 assassinated CULT MEMBER in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
DIG FOR CAR handily defeated TOMMYKNOCKERS in a popular 1 minute mismatched battle.
WAX SPILL devastated OSKSI NOBLE in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
LONG LINES slimly lost to PRIME CUT in a 4 minute gruesome match.
SHOPPING CART slimly lost to HACKED TO PIECES in a 3 minute gory bout.
BIASED JUDGES savagely defeated THE USEROUS MERCHANT in a 8 minute gruesome fight.
FIRE STARTER unbelievably bested CULT MEMBER in a monotonous 7 minute brutal match.
FLASHPOINT was unbelievably bested by DARK in a popular 3 minute bloody fight.
NONSTANDARD demolished CULT MEMBER in a 1 minute mismatched duel.
TRUTH HURTS was overpowered by NOT NEWS in a 1 minute one-sided match.
BOOBY TRAP overpowered PERSISTANT BEGGAR in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
ANDREW JONES overpowered APES OF WRATH in a 1 minute uneven brawl.
MISSED STOP was devastated by ETERNAL REST in a 1 minute mismatched match.
FISH STORY subdued DEPUTY DOG in a 1 minute match.
UNPREPARED vanquished PERSISTANT BEGGAR in a 1 minute one-sided brawl.
CHAIN LETTER overpowered MORDANT DESERTER in a 1 minute uneven fight.
THE RED SHORE was handily defeated by BUY ME in a 1 minute mismatched match.
NO CARS AVAILABLE slaughtered MORDANT DESERTER in a 1 minute uneven match.
UNREADABLE defeated YOUR LAST NIGHT in a exciting 3 minute amateur's bout.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                  25         STRIKING ATTACK   55 -  20 -  4      73  |
|BASHING ATTACK                  21         PARRY-RIPOSTE     12 -   5 -  0      71  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                 20         TOTAL PARRY       33 -  14 -  1      70  |
|AIMED BLOW                      18         BASHING ATTACK    65 -  30 -  1      68  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                     10         PARRY-LUNGE       31 -  16 -  1      66  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    9         WALL OF STEEL     23 -  17 -  1      58  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      6         AIMED BLOW        67 -  51 -  6      57  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  4         LUNGING ATTACK    67 -  55 -  3      55  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     3         PARRY-STRIKE      10 -  10 -  1      50  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    2         SLASHING ATTACK   11 -  19 -  0      37  |

Turn 303 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-RIPOSTE      2 -  0     LUNGING ATTACK    10 - 15         3  LUNGING ATTACK 
TOTAL PARRY        5 -  1     SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  3         2  STRIKING ATTACK
BASHING ATTACK    15 -  6                                       2  PARRY-RIPOSTE  
STRIKING ATTACK   14 -  6                                       1  BASHING ATTACK 
PARRY-STRIKE       2 -  1                                       1  AIMED BLOW     
PARRY-LUNGE        6 -  4                                       1  WALL OF STEEL  
WALL OF STEEL      5 -  4                                       1  PARRY-LUNGE    
AIMED BLOW         9 -  9     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
STRIKING ATTACK  TURBULENT BILLIARDS 6306   13   2  0  136 BAD COMBOS (689)
LUNGING ATTACK   CUB 6810                   10   9  0  123 NL CENTRAL (783)
BASHING ATTACK   REPETITIVE 7684            13   3  0  120 BASH BROS NEWS (951)
AIMED BLOW       UNREALITY 7016             12   0  0  117 BB REALITY SHOW (824)
PARRY-LUNGE      FAKE SALE PRICE 7775       14   2  0  110 BB INFOMERCIAL (969)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    DERAILED 6912              13   3  0  109 BASH BROS TRAIN (803)
PARRY-STRIKE     4 HOUR GAMES 6579          10   4  0   83 BASH BROS BASEBALL (738)
SLASHING ATTACK  FULCRUM 6122               15   4  0   77 RUSSIAN BIRDS (671)
WALL OF STEEL    LAWN DART CATCHING 6308     9   3  1   76 BAD COMBOS (689)
TOTAL PARRY      FLICKERING 8048             7   0  0   51 BASH BROS LIGHTS (1021)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is GENE AUTRY 7838.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was DOG DAYS OF SUMMER 9191.  The ten other most popular fighters were NOISY NEIGHBOR 
7828, FLASHPOINT 8622, UNREADABLE 9601, SKIN TICKET 8630, MR RIGHT HANDED 6876, 
MELTING FLOOD 8016, DEAD PLANTS 8159, AMWAY 7795, DARK 8927, and PIRATE 6806.

The least popular fighter this week was DRUNK 7812.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were FIRE STARTER 8061, FLICKERING 8048, THE RED SHORE 9180, MISSED STOP 
8276, APES OF WRATH 8827, TRUTH HURTS 8627, LETHAL DOSAGE 8862, WRONGPLACEWRONGSIGN 
9608, MOLDY 7930, and DISCOVERY TOYS 7798.

The following warriors will travel to AD after next turn:

DERAILED (72-6912) BASH BROS TRAIN (803)
ARAMIS RAMIREZ (72-5967) PURPLE PLATYPI (659)

The following warriors have traveled to AD after fighting this turn:

CLOGGED CHIMNEY (72-7589) BASH BROS FIREPLACE (934)