DUELMASTERS NEWSLETTER

Date   : 09/04/2003    Duedate: 09/17/2003

DAIYLA KIV ARENA

DM-74    TURN-271

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

FONZ
LAME ALLIANCES (455)
(74-3332) [14-4-1,142]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

FONZ                           HORNY HORROR
LAME ALLIANCES (455)           CARNIVOROUS SHEEP (487)
(74-3332) [14-4-1,142]         (74-3798) [1-2-0,5]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

SYR-DAVAN                      SLOPPY DRUNK
SAND DANCERS (251)             PARTY GEEKS (431)
(74-3053) [19-21-2,89]         (74-3306) [8-10-0,48]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

FORCE OF FIVE (470)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. VUELTA PELETON (421)        30
2. SUPERIOR FORCES ZC (467)    28      LAME ALLIANCES (455)
3. DARK TOADZ (430)            28      Unchartered Team
4. STDS (450)                  26
5. THE DREIHDENS (433)         21      CARNIVOROUS SHEEP (487)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 1 LAME ALLIANCES (455)      14   4  1 77.8   1/ 4 FORCE OF FIVE (470)       9  6 1
 2/ 2 SLYTHERIN HOUSE (474)     59  34  4 63.4   2/ 8 VUELTA PELETON (421)      9  6 0
 3/ 3 1988 DODGERS (435)        60  36  1 62.5   3/ 9 DARK TOADZ (430)          9  6 0
 4/ 5 DARK TOADZ (430)          57  38  0 60.0   4/ 1 1988 DODGERS (435)        9  6 0
 5/ 4 CORPS (346)              326 218 17 59.9   5/ 5 THE DREIHDENS (433)       8  6 1
 6/ 7 SUPERIOR FORCES ZC (467)  50  35  1 58.8   6/ 2 SAND DANCERS (251)        8  7 0
 7- 6*THE WILLBURYS 74 (406)     7   5  2 58.3   7/ 3 SUPERIOR FORCES ZC (467)  7  5 0
 8/ 0 ARENA FELINES (461)       29  21  0 58.0   8/11 PARTY GEEKS (431)         6  6 0
 9/ 8 FORCE OF FIVE (470)       56  42  3 57.1   9/ 7 STDS (450)                6  7 1
10- 9 KNIGHTS OF MORDOR (457)   41  33  1 55.4  10/15 WICKED DESTINY (440)      6  9 0
11-10 REVELATIONS (400)         45  38  7 54.2  11-14*THE WILLBURYS 74 (406)    5  0 2
12/13 STDS (450)                48  46  2 51.1  12/10 CORPS (346)               5  2 0
13/11 WICKED DESTINY (440)      46  45  4 50.5  13- 6 EINHERJAR IV (454)        5  5 0
14-14 EINHERJAR IV (454)        46  45  4 50.5  14/13 SLYTHERIN HOUSE (474)     5 10 0
15/12 THE FINAL FANTASY (437)   13  13  1 50.0  15/12 SPRINGFIELD USA (425)     4 11 0
16/16 THE DREIHDENS (433)       47  49  2 49.0  16/17 LAME ALLIANCES (455)      3  0 0
17/17 PARTY GEEKS (431)         37  39  2 48.7  17-16 KNIGHTS OF MORDOR (457)   3  3 0
18/18 SAND DANCERS (251)       609 654 27 48.2  18/22 FAULTY PREMISES (436)     3  7 0

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
19/22 VUELTA PELETON (421)      48  52  2 48.0  19/18 THE FINAL FANTASY (437)   2  1 0
20/20 NOPE (460)                30  33  2 47.6  20-19 REVELATIONS (400)         2  2 0
21/19 WENSINWASIN SYNDIC (418)  37  41  6 47.4  21/24 NOPE (460)                2  3 0
22-23 LUROCIANS XI (462)        35  46  2 43.2  22-21*HORROR ENCLAVE (444)      1  1 0
23/24 FAULTY PREMISES (436)     37  51  2 42.0  23/23*CARNIVOROUS SHEEP (487)   1  2 0
24-26*THE SOUTH (483)            2   3  0 40.0  24-27 LUROCIANS XI (462)        1  2 0
25/25 CAT FIGHT (439)           25  39  0 39.1  25/20 CAT FIGHT (439)           1  3 0
26/27 SPRINGFIELD USA (425)     36  58  1 38.3  26/28 WENSINWASIN SYNDIC (418)  0  3 0
27/15*CARNIVOROUS SHEEP (487)    1   2  0 33.3  27-25*THE SOUTH (483)           0  2 0
28-28*HORROR ENCLAVE (444)       4  26  0 13.3  28/ 0 ARENA FELINES (461)       0  1 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

                         MVP Standings for Turn 18 of ZalCon

We are now at Turn 18 in the ZalCon MVP contest and barring death or early graduation
it looks like our MVP is running away from the pack.  Tom Riddle has a commanding 27
point lead on his closest competitor and teammate, Vincent Crabbe and a 30 point lead
on his closest true rival, Songbird.  The good news is the Duelmaster can amass 11
oints a turn...someone just has to take it from him, and soon.  Any takers?  So
without further ado, here are the current standings:

1.  Tom Riddle          ST  Salazar Slytherin   98
2.  Vincent Crabbe      AB  Salazar Slytherin   71
3.  Songbird            BA  Tig Toad            68
4.  <Eraser>            TP  Manager             59
5.  Mickey Hatcher      SL  Zalgor Prigg        57
6.  Ganglare            LU  Skullagrim          51
7.  Ultra Endeavor      PR  Slaughter Priest    50
8.  Durany              WS  Bum                 49
9.  Tony Tavler         PS  Dr Mabuse           47
10. Kirk Gibson         PS  Zalgor Prigg        46
11. <Cookie Jones>      TP  Manager             45
12. Dreihden Plunger    PL  Dreihdenflahg       44
13. Hofding Warg        TP  Skullagrim          39
14. Stan the Man        ST  Marshall D          38
15. Syphillus           PL  Upinya              36
16. Lord Voldemort      LU  Salazar Slytherin   36
17. Father William      LU  Tig Toad            35
18. Orel Hershiser      ST  Zalgor Prigg        34
19. Draco Malfoy        LU  Salazar Slytherin   34
20. Frankie the Fish    ST  Marshall D          32

That is this turn's Top 20 list!  Good luck to any who wish to attempt killing or
dethroning our current MVP, Tom Riddle!  I will check in again on Turn 20 then each
turn until the end of the contest!

Zalgor Prigg

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                        *--=== LIRITH KAI REGIONAL NEWS ===--*

                                     Duelmasters
                                 -------------------
 DM  65 DAL SHANG (turn 297): MASOOD of DARK TOADS (TigToad, mgr.)
 DM  74 DAIYLA KIV (turn 270): TOM RIDDLE of SLYTHERIN HOUSE (Salazar Slytherin)
 DM  75 JADE MOUNTAIN (turn 265): IAN of DARK TOADS (TigToad, mgr.)
 DM  78 LIN TIRIAN (turn 252): BLANK of TREE PEOPLE (Elderberry, mgr.)
ADM 107 LIRIN KIV (turn 229): STILE of SPLIT INFINITY 2 from DAL SHANG (TigToad)

                                      Top Teams
                                       --------
 DM  65 DAL SHANG (turn 297): SAND DANCERS (Li Dan, mgr.)
 DM  74 DAIYLA KIV (turn 270): 1988 DODGERS (Zalgor Prigg, mgr.)
 DM  75 JADE MOUNTAIN (turn 265): DARK TOADS (TigToad, mgr.)
 DM  78 LIN TIRIAN (turn 252): ROCK-ETTS II (Pie-Rite, mgr.)
ADM 107 LIRIN KIV (turn 229): DARK TOADS, etc. (TigToad, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
                                  -----------------
 DM  75 JADE MOUNTAIN (turn 265): IAN of DARK TOADS (TigToad, mgr.)
                      (turn 264): NATHANIEL  DARK TOADS (TigToad, mgr.)
                                  PREMEDITATION of LEGALESE (The Judge, mgr.)
 DM  78 LIN TIRIAN (turn 251): MAD LODEN of SAND DANCERS (Li Dan, mgr.)

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

Ganglare, Ganglare, Ganglare.  What possibly made you think you stood a chance
against me?  I had just smacked you down the last two times we fought yet you then
turn around and CHALLENGE me?  I thought you were smarter than that.  Don't get me
wrong, I'm extremely glad you did it, glad but amazed.  You are now safely out of the
Challenger Champs and its treasured political points.  Plus you now have more than
six losses so will not be graduating at turn 20 of the contest.  Unfortunately my
future self and Draco are not performing up to the same level of excellence as me, so
I doubt my teammates will be able to take advantage of this fact.  But I am glad that
at least Father William will probably benefit.  Of course, unless I lose, it might
all be moot since the 17 political points will be hard to come by for any of the
lungers.

Dreihdens, my condolences on your loss.  I was rooting for TP.  Unless I am involved,
I enjoy to see upsets and it would have been exciting for someone to edge out Manager
in the Total Parry style competition.  So now please punish Frankie the Fish,
repeatedly, for his vile transgression.

Your Present and Future Lord,

Tom Riddle

                                      SPY REPORT

     Greetings, Warriors of DAIYLA KIV.  Allow this humble servant Novgorodny Vir to 
give you a respite from the fights in the form of this Spyreport.  The boys at 1988 
DODGERS left the arena dejected, after being kicked out of the top spot by FORCE OF 
FIVE.  Good show!  EINHERJAR IV after a sorry 0-0-0 might want to consider abandoning 
the sands and taking up singing the 'Can't fight no more' blues!  What's a move up by 
6 you ask?  (alright, maybe you didn't ask)  Cause for celebration, according to 
VUELTA PELETON.  Good things come to those who fight well, as DARK TOADZ can attest, 
moving up by 6.  Practice pays for GONORRHOEA, who pummelled VINCENT CRABBE, to 
pocket 22 points.  Win some, lose some.  Speaking of which, NANCY was winsome, after 
beating KINSLAYER and seeing him lose 15 points.  The arena was more crowded than 
usual this time, as FONZ faced DAIYLA KIV's Duelmaster.  Now I can't insult FONZ, as 
he has gloriously dueled to the top.  Oh great new Duelmaster!!!  (Stop me if I lay 
it on too thick) So who was the warrior seen charging into immovable walls and 
challenging dead trees?  Someone's got a basic problem...   
     My mother wished me to avoid conflict, and seek the gentle trade of Spyreporter. 
But warriors aren't supposed to avoid fights!  Perhaps the warriors of WICKED DESTINY 
should take up some hobbies, as they are the most avoided team...  As a woman of good 
breeding scorns the "warriors" of FAULTY PREMISES, so did that sorry team shy from 
WICKED DESTINY Is it charming personality?  Conversational abilities?  Good oral 
hygiene?  Whatever it is, DONSTAN is the most challenged warrior.  Them's the breaks, 
OTTO.  Expecting fair challenges from SLYTHERIN HOUSE is evidently too much to ask.  
GREGORY GOYLE defeated OTTO.  The whole thing leaves a bitter memory.  CANON found 
himself challenged by a warrior 23 below:  <ERASER>.  <ERASER> of SUPERIOR FORCES ZC 
kept his wits as he subdued CANON.   
     Like the wind whispering among the pines, do hearest I many disquieting rumors.  
Citizens of DAIYLA KIV, be sure to settle your debts with HIV#3 of STDS.  She's 
relocating to the Dark Arena and has other things on hers mind!  Q:  What's a record 
like 7-10-1 get you?  A:  A free trip to the Dark Arena!  This week's winner:  MALICE 
of WICKED DESTINY!  Like a tattered, worn-out, faded, out-of-fashion garment cast out 
to rot, DRIPS of STDS has been summarily sent to the Dark Arena.  Ask not for whom 
the sword slashes; it slashes for thee.   
     All good things must come to an end.  As if buffeted by forces of nature beyond 
my control, I must take my leave of this place.  Like a mixed metaphor, and an 
overtaxed simile, I now bid DAIYLA KIV farewell-- Novgorodny Vir  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 FONZ 3332                    14   4  1   142       LAME ALLIANCES (455)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 MICKEY HATCHER 3356          15   4  0   140       1988 DODGERS (435)
-DEATH STRIKE 3368             9   3  0   123       LUROCIANS XI (462)
 STAN THE MAN 3556            12   5  0   110       FORCE OF FIVE (470)
 FATHER WILLIAM 3155          14   4  0   107       DARK TOADZ (430)
 SUMMER 3617                  10   6  1   102       FORCE OF FIVE (470)
 DURANY 3213                  14   4  1   101       WICKED DESTINY (440)
 ULTRA ENDEAVOR 3187          12   6  0    98       FAULTY PREMISES (436)
 TOM RIDDLE 3501              15   3  1    93       SLYTHERIN HOUSE (474)
 FRANKIE THE FISH 3489        13   6  1    93       FORCE OF FIVE (470)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 JAY HOWELL 3177              10   8  0    90       1988 DODGERS (435)
 SYR-DAVAN 3053               19  21  2    89       SAND DANCERS (251)
 <ERASER> 3425                12   6  0    88       SUPERIOR FORCES ZC (467)
-GANGLARE 3324                11   7  2    87       EINHERJAR IV (454)
 <FOLGER'S CRYSTALS> 3524     11   7  1    87       SUPERIOR FORCES ZC (467)
 SYPHILLUS 3280               11   8  0    86       STDS (450)
-THRAKATULUK 3343              9   7  0    86       KNIGHTS OF MORDOR (457)
 <COOKIE JONES> 3422          14   4  0    84       SUPERIOR FORCES ZC (467)
 CANON 2679                   15  12  0    83       CORPS (346)
 TONY TAVLER 3226             13   6  1    82       VUELTA PELETON (421)
 GONORRHOEA 3283              11   8  0    80       STDS (450)
 OREL HERSHISER 3180           8  10  0    74       1988 DODGERS (435)
 LORD VOLDEMORT 3499          11   8  1    73       SLYTHERIN HOUSE (474)
 TILAEN TYL SANH 3098         12  14  0    72       SAND DANCERS (251)
 SONGBIRD 3153                12   7  0    72       DARK TOADZ (430)
 <CORUSCATOR> 3424            10   8  0    72       SUPERIOR FORCES ZC (467)
-HOFDING WARG 3469            14   4  0    71       EINHERJAR IV (454)
 DREIHDEN PLUNGER 3344        11   8  1    70       THE DREIHDENS (433)
 KIRK GIBSON 3230             12   7  1    69       1988 DODGERS (435)
 DRACO MALFOY 3500            11   7  1    68       SLYTHERIN HOUSE (474)
 ANGEL EDO 3662                9   5  1    68       VUELTA PELETON (421)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-DURBATULUK 3367               9   7  0    66       KNIGHTS OF MORDOR (457)
 DREIHDEN TAG 3759             5   2  1    66       THE DREIHDENS (433)
 KRAZY KAT 3550                7   9  0    65       FAULTY PREMISES (436)
 VINCENT CRABBE 3498          13   6  1    64       SLYTHERIN HOUSE (474)
-DOUBLE HOMICIDE 2990          7   3  0    64       REVELATIONS (400)
 VIRGIN QUEEN 3681             9   4  0    62       DARK TOADZ (430)
 NANCY 3629                    6   1  0    62       CAT FIGHT (439)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 JADOW 3214                   10   8  0    59       WICKED DESTINY (440)
 PELAK TEN ZORN 3062          12  22  0    58       SAND DANCERS (251)
 MAX FACTOR 3690               6   2  0    57       CORPS (346)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-TARAPYN 3088                 13   8  1    56       WENSINWASIN SYNDICAT (418)
 GREGORY GOYLE 3497            9  10  0    56       SLYTHERIN HOUSE (474)
 DONSTAN 3061                 10  25  0    55       SAND DANCERS (251)
 NEKKID CHICK 3307             9   9  0    53       PARTY GEEKS (431)
 SANTIAGO 3654                11   3  0    52       DARK TOADZ (430)
-SLAP YOURSELF 2991            5   5  0    52       REVELATIONS (400)
 IKER FLORES 3761              5   1  0    52       VUELTA PELETON (421)
 LOUD DRUNK 3554              11   5  1    51       PARTY GEEKS (431)
 SLOPPY DRUNK 3306             8  10  0    48       PARTY GEEKS (431)
-CHILL FACTOR 2994             4   4  0    48       REVELATIONS (400)
 SETZER GABBIANI 3485          9   7  1    46       THE FINAL FANTASY (437)
 DARTH DECLAWED 3420           7   4  0    46       ARENA FELINES (461)
-NURNLING 3661                 7   5  0    45       KNIGHTS OF MORDOR (457)
 RICK DEMPSEY 3750             6   1  0    45       1988 DODGERS (435)
 KINSLAYER 3421               10   8  0    44       WICKED DESTINY (440)
 CHINA 3201                    8   7  0    44       CAT FIGHT (439)
 IRONHAND ORC 3190             6  12  2    42       FAULTY PREMISES (436)
 KAGES FAULT 3189              6  12  0    42       FAULTY PREMISES (436)
 SLUT 3491                     5  10  0    41       CAT FIGHT (439)
-KRIMPATUL 3473                7   4  0    40       KNIGHTS OF MORDOR (457)
 NELSON 3670                   6   8  0    38       SPRINGFIELD USA (425)
 APU 3125                      4  14  0    38       SPRINGFIELD USA (425)
-NO 3359                       7   3  0    37       NOPE (460)
-CAT STEVENS 3363              6   4  0    36       ARENA FELINES (461)
 OTTO 3128                     6  13  0    35       SPRINGFIELD USA (425)
-APOSTLE PAUL II 3054          4   0  0    35       REVELATIONS (400)
-SUPERSOL 2977                 5   6  1    34       REVELATIONS (400)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 DREIHDEN OBTUSE 3758          5   2  0    33       THE DREIHDENS (433)
-IN THE PIT! 3792              3   0  0    33       EINHERJAR IV (454)
 BLACK ORPHEUS 3709            7   4  0    32       DARK TOADZ (430)
-NEGATORY 3361                 5   6  1    32       NOPE (460)
 FAT PUNK 3721                 4   5  0    32       PARTY GEEKS (431)
-GIMBATUL 3392                 6   5  1    31       KNIGHTS OF MORDOR (457)
-SAND CAPPER 3362              5   5  0    30       ARENA FELINES (461)
 CLONE MISHAP 3708             3   7  0    30       FAULTY PREMISES (436)
-NOT POSSIBLE 3718             4   3  0    29       NOPE (460)
-FEROCIOUS FELINE 3366         5   5  0    28       ARENA FELINES (461)
 HERPES III 3715               6   3  1    26       STDS (450)
-PRISSY PANTS 3713             4   5  0    26       LUROCIANS XI (462)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-PINKERTON 3735                2   0  1    23       CORPS (346)
-DEEP FLESH WOUND 3723         4   3  0    21       LUROCIANS XI (462)
-SIGARD 3748                   2   5  0    21       EINHERJAR IV (454)
 ABE SIMPSON 3764              2   4  0    20       SPRINGFIELD USA (425)
 NEVER AGAIN 3685              4   3  0    19       NOPE (460)
-D'ALLON 2982                  3   1  0    18       THE WILLBURYS 74 (406)
-LORD TAYLOR 3731              1   0  0    17       CORPS (346)
-DUBAWNT 3691                  2   4  0    16       CAT FIGHT (439)
-ROBERT E. LEE 3743            2   3  0    15       THE SOUTH (483)
 GARRIOO 3802                  2   0  0    14       VUELTA PELETON (421)
-POP! 3003                     1   0  1    14       THE WILLBURYS 74 (406)
-KRAKEL 3002                   1   0  1    14       THE WILLBURYS 74 (406)
-FNB 3004                      1   0  0    13       THE WILLBURYS 74 (406)
-FROGGYENUFF4NO1 3651          1   3  0    13       WENSINWASIN SYNDICAT (418)
-ZIDANE TRIBAL 3194            1   1  0    12       THE FINAL FANTASY (437)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-SNAP 3001                     1   0  0    12       THE WILLBURYS 74 (406)
 STINKMONKEY 3778              1   1  0    11       NOPE (460)
 TSIRELL 3793                  3   1  0    10       SAND DANCERS (251)
-CYAN GARAMONDE 3195           2   0  0     9       THE FINAL FANTASY (437)
 AITOR KINTANA 3801            1   1  0     9       VUELTA PELETON (421)
 BISHOP 3765                   1   4  1     8       WICKED DESTINY (440)
-HAIL HAMMER 3747              1   3  0     8       HORROR ENCLAVE (444)
 THE TICK 3788                 1   3  0     8       FORCE OF FIVE (470)
 KOKANEE 3730                  1   4  0     7       CAT FIGHT (439)
 DIXIE 3787                    1   3  0     6       FORCE OF FIVE (470)
-ALISIS URSUICIDE 3745         1   1  0     6       WENSINWASIN SYNDICAT (418)
-INGVAR VANIER 3804            1   0  0     6       EINHERJAR IV (454)
-ISANDEL 3252                  1   3  0     6       HORROR ENCLAVE (444)
-DANCING FOOL 3385             0   2  0     6       PARTY GEEKS (431)
 DREIHDEN BLOOD 3800           1   2  0     5       THE DREIHDENS (433)
 HORNY HORROR 3798             1   2  0     5       CARNIVOROUS SHEEP (487)
-GADRIEN 3790                  1   1  0     5       HORROR ENCLAVE (444)
-GERBIL ASSASSIN 3775          0   1  0     5       LUROCIANS XI (462)
-SUM1GIVEMEANAME 3649          1   1  0     4       WENSINWASIN SYNDICAT (418)
-CAIT SITH 3196                1   1  0     4       THE FINAL FANTASY (437)
-THRYNDEL 3253                 0   4  0     4       HORROR ENCLAVE (444)
-LOCKE COLE 3486               0   2  0     3       THE FINAL FANTASY (437)
-PAIN AND SIMPLE 3789          0   2  0     2       HORROR ENCLAVE (444)
 MAGGIE SIMPSON 3805           0   1  0     1       SPRINGFIELD USA (425)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
DREIHDEN TP 3166      14  4 0 THE DREIHDENS 433     FRANKIE THE FISH 3489 270         
CRAZY LARRY 3439       9  6 0 FORCE OF FIVE 470     TOM RIDDLE 3501       267 NOT REVE
THE CHAD 3774          0  1 0 FORCE OF FIVE 470     URIA 3756             267 REVENGED
BART SIMPSON 3126      8 10 0 SPRINGFIELD USA 425   DREIHDEN TAG 3759     270         
HIV#3 3518             9  9 1 STDS 450              STENRO BLACKBROWS 20  271 NONE    
DRIPS 3541             9  7 0 STDS 450              MARHAN HAMHAND 22     271 NONE    
I'M JUST A GIRL 3650   2  5 1 WENSINWASIN SYNDI 418 HERPES III 3715       271         
MALICE 3210            7 11 1 WICKED DESTINY 440    STENRO BLACKBROWS 20  271 NONE    

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Gonorrhoea -- Besides having the most misspelled name I've seen, I'm pleased by your
challenges against my warriors.  It's not often that the wins deliver.
Unfortunately, your challenges didn't go through, so please try again. -- TigToad

Dr. Mabuse -- Got your newest entry, thanks! -- TigToad

Dreihden Plunger -- ("A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries
up the bones.")  Have you given up, child? -- Your leading PL, Syphillus

Cookie Jones -- I lasted 7 minutes with you...I have challenged you again this turn.
Hope we are able to fight again. -- Syphillus

STD Stable -- Drips and myself are headed to the Dark Arena to meet our fate...or...
if one of us are lucky enough...may return to fight. -- HIV #3
P.S.  Sorry we didn't make the cut...now our lives shall be cut short.

Clone Mishap -- Sorry about your mishap! -- Gonorrhoea

Draco Malfoy -- Bad boy!  Keep your hands to yourself, you young heathen. -- Syr-
Davan

Jadow -- Do you think this's my destiny?  Olinda says if I get a total of thirty-six

losses before my thirteenth win, she'll let me retire.  Gosh, what generosity, eh?
There's nothing like an older sister for that kind of thing. -- Pelak ten Zorn,
brooding darkly on sibling relationships

Nelson -- That was kind of a crazy challenge, but thanks anyway.  I really needed
that win. -- Donstan

Dixie -- Ah...tall, aren't you? -- Tsirell
P.S.  You know, my record is beginning to worry me.  I think I probably need a
loss....

Coruscator -- Shiny armor is not enough, and neither are witty quips. -- Tilaen tyl
Sanh

19 August 2003
     Citizens of Ghea (only the ignorant fail to note Lirith Kai is not in Alastari),
no new day is rising, but the sun is setting on just another beautiful evening.
While you were sleeping, an irksome rabble has entered the always fair Aruak City.
Of course they fought alongside our warriors, most not so treasured, as all
gladiators do.  They drank with themselves, and slept with themselves.  Whether they
had masks, who cares.
     Warriors, don't be afraid.  For years Aruak has been one of the safest cities in
Ghea, and that custom has been continually cultivated, and will continue to be by
those who have called it home for years and those who live, fight, and die by the
same ethics.  There is no contest, nor has there ever needed to be one for many
years.  A conflict of personalities has arisen, and the city has been 'invaded' by
pests.
     Any rules that are annouced will be purely for the joy of the lemmings' own
little world.  Those who are being targeted have no interest in participating except
to defend the integrity of an arena that is different from others.  Whether you
choose to come to Aruak, do it for your own reasons, not theirs.
    Competing in Aruak City has never been for the faint of heart or the weak willed.
Combat is combat, wherever you go.  Blood will flow as always, and now many innocents
will be caught in the middle, but those who defend Aruak's traditions never target
those who bring respect of Aruaki customs with them to our home.
    So ignore the private ranting announcement brought by the stuporous
Frothingsloshers.  If you choose Aruak City, do not choose it for an unsanctioned and
bogus 'contest', choose it for the tradition.  Choose it because Aruak is different.

Defenders of Aruak

25 August 2003
To any that care -- The CDC is back; our current roster is:
     Malaquar -- Minion of Guardian
     Pip the Troll -- Burly Enforcer Type
     mouse -- Official Sneaky Bastard
     Papa Bear -- Elder Statesmen
                     The Sealer says, "Hi, I'm the dealer."
                     Papa Bear says, "It's not my f****n fault."
Guardian -- Paper Figurehead

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

HIV#3 was barely slain by STENRO BLACKBROWS in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
MALICE was savagely slain by STENRO BLACKBROWS in a 2 minute brutal Dark Arena melee.
DRIPS was slain by MARHAN HAMHAND in a 1 minute Dark Arena duel.
FONZ devastated TOM RIDDLE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge Title contest.
OREL HERSHISER was defeated by SYR-DAVAN in a 1 minute master's Challenge match.
<ERASER> won victory over CANON in a exciting 3 minute master's Challenge fight.
MICKEY HATCHER devastated FRANKIE THE FISH in a 1 minute Challenge competition.
LORD VOLDEMORT was handily defeated by ULTRA ENDEAVOR in a 1 minute Challenge melee.
SUMMER viciously subdued <COOKIE JONES> in a popular 2 minute gruesome Challenge duel.
SONGBIRD lost to SYPHILLUS in a exciting 1 minute veteran's Challenge fight.
KIRK GIBSON was overcome by TONY TAVLER in a 2 minute veteran's Challenge bout.
GONORRHOEA demolished VINCENT CRABBE in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge competition.
SETZER GABBIANI was devastated by <CORUSCATOR> in a 1 minute Challenge battle.
GREGORY GOYLE overpowered OTTO in a 2 minute mismatched Challenge conflict.
MAX FACTOR overpowered APU in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
IRONHAND ORC was devastated by DRACO MALFOY in a 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
KAGES FAULT was luckily beaten by NEKKID CHICK in a 3 minute master's Challenge brawl.
KRAZY KAT overpowered PELAK TEN ZORN in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge bout.
VIRGIN QUEEN overpowered DONSTAN in a popular 1 minute one-sided Challenge bout.
BISHOP was handily defeated by BLACK ORPHEUS in a 1 minute Challenge competition.
DIXIE was luckily beaten by GARRIOO in a 3 minute beginner's Challenge fight.
HORNY HORROR was demolished by ABE SIMPSON in a 1 minute uneven Challenge bout.
STAN THE MAN vanquished JAY HOWELL in a 1 minute mismatched fray.
DURANY narrowly defeated MADAME U-TANA in a 2 minute veteran's match.
FATHER WILLIAM overpowered TILAEN TYL SANH in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
<FOLGER'S CRYSTALS> overpowered JADOW in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
LOUD DRUNK was overpowered by DREIHDEN TAG in a 1 minute uneven match.
DREIHDEN PLUNGER overpowered SLUT in a 1 minute uneven duel.
ANGEL EDO savagely defeated DARTH DECLAWED in a exciting 1 minute bloody fray.
KINSLAYER was vanquished by NANCY in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
SLOPPY DRUNK was luckily beaten by RICK DEMPSEY in a action packed 3 minute gory duel.
CHINA was beaten by IKER FLORES in a 5 minute match.
SANTIAGO savagely defeated DREIHDEN OBTUSE in a 2 minute brutal fight.
CLONE MISHAP was overpowered by DANGEROUS BON LOKAR in a 1 minute uneven bout.
NELSON demolished NEVER AGAIN in a 1 minute uneven contest.
HERPES III luckily killed I'M JUST A GIRL in a 1 minute struggle.
FAT PUNK demolished TSIRELL in a 1 minute mismatched match.
KOKANEE was luckily beaten by STINKMONKEY in a 2 minute brutal novice's fray.
THE TICK subdued MAGGIE SIMPSON in a 3 minute novice's conflict.
DREIHDEN BLOOD slimly lost to AITOR KINTANA in a 3 minute gruesome novice's bout.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|STRIKING ATTACK                 17         TOTAL PARRY       70 -  57 -  0      55  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                  14         SLASHING ATTACK   53 -  44 -  1      55  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  9         PARRY-STRIKE      22 -  19 -  1      54  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      6         WALL OF STEEL     32 -  30 -  2      52  |
|AIMED BLOW                       6         LUNGING ATTACK   102 - 100 -  4      50  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      5         AIMED BLOW        34 -  34 -  0      50  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    5         STRIKING ATTACK  107 - 109 -  6      50  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   5         PARRY-RIPOSTE     29 -  35 -  0      45  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     4         PARRY-LUNGE       32 -  43 -  0      43  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    4         BASHING ATTACK    34 -  60 -  5      36  |

Turn 271 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-LUNGE        4 -  1     LUNGING ATTACK     6 -  8         5  STRIKING ATTACK
PARRY-STRIKE       3 -  1     STRIKING ATTACK    7 - 10         2  SLASHING ATTACK
SLASHING ATTACK    6 -  3     WALL OF STEEL      2 -  3         2  LUNGING ATTACK 
TOTAL PARRY        4 -  2     AIMED BLOW         2 -  4         1  WALL OF STEEL  
PARRY-RIPOSTE      2 -  2     BASHING ATTACK     0 -  5         1  PARRY-RIPOSTE  

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
SLASHING ATTACK  FONZ 3332                  14   4  1  142 LAME ALLIANCES (455)
STRIKING ATTACK  STAN THE MAN 3556          12   5  0  110 FORCE OF FIVE (470)

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
LUNGING ATTACK   FATHER WILLIAM 3155        14   4  0  107 DARK TOADZ (430)
WALL OF STEEL    DURANY 3213                14   4  1  101 WICKED DESTINY (440)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    ULTRA ENDEAVOR 3187        12   6  0   98 FAULTY PREMISES (436)
TOTAL PARRY      <ERASER> 3425              12   6  0   88 SUPERIOR FORCES ZC (467)
PARRY-LUNGE      SYPHILLUS 3280             11   8  0   86 STDS (450)
PARRY-STRIKE     TONY TAVLER 3226           13   6  1   82 VUELTA PELETON (421)
BASHING ATTACK   SONGBIRD 3153              12   7  0   72 DARK TOADZ (430)
AIMED BLOW       VINCENT CRABBE 3498        13   6  1   64 SLYTHERIN HOUSE (474)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is SYR-DAVAN 3053.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was SLOPPY DRUNK 3306.  The ten other most popular fighters were CANON 2679, SUMMER 
3617, KIRK GIBSON 3230, TONY TAVLER 3226, KAGES FAULT 3189, DIXIE 3787, SANTIAGO 
3654, MAGGIE SIMPSON 3805, DREIHDEN BLOOD 3800, and OREL HERSHISER 3180.

The least popular fighter this week was IKER FLORES 3761.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were TSIRELL 3793, NEVER AGAIN 3685, CLONE MISHAP 3708, KINSLAYER 
3421, SLUT 3491, LOUD DRUNK 3554, TILAEN TYL SANH 3098, JAY HOWELL 3177, HORNY HORROR 
3798, and DONSTAN 3061.

The following warriors will travel to ADVANCED DUELMASTERS after next turn:

FONZ (74-3332) LAME ALLIANCES (455)
TOM RIDDLE (74-3501) SLYTHERIN HOUSE (474)

                                FACE-TO-FACE XXXII

     Our next Winter Face-to-Face will be held on Martin Luther King weekend, Friday 
through Sunday, 16-18 January 2004, at the Embassy Suites in Tempe, Arizona (4400 S 
Rural Rd).  Room rates are $119.00 per night, 1-2 occupancy, which includes breakfast.  
The rooms are blocked.  The reservations number is 480-897-7444; tell them you're with 
the "Reality Simulations Face to Face Convention" block.  Our room block will be 
released in mid-December, so please make sure you reserve your room before then.
     There is a free shuttle to the airport, as well as free parking.  The hotel is 
located down the freeway in Tempe.  All rooms have high speed internet (for an extra 
charge).  There is a fitness center, jacuzzi, and pool, and of course a bar and 
restaurant inside the hotel.  And there's Denny's right across the street.  Look for 
transportation info in the tournament information sheet.
     The tournament information sheet/strategy sheet should be out sometime in late 
November/early December. 
     If you haven't been to a Face-to-Face before, you're overdue.  If you have, 
you'll be back.  Don't miss this one, it'll be a blast!  See you there! 

                                          -- Green Eyes and the RSI Staff