Date   : 11/24/2006    Duedate: 12/07/2006


DM-78    TURN-337

This Weeks Top Honors


(78-2631) [18-29-0,104]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

JIGGER KREE                    OOKLA THE MOK
SAND DANCERS (68)              SUPER SCIENCE (310)
(78-2631) [18-29-0,104]        (78-2719) [4-1-0,47]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

JIGGER KREE                    SHANA THE KNIFE
SAND DANCERS (68)              SAND DANCERS (68)
(78-2631) [18-29-0,104]        (78-2663) [14-19-0,69]



Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. DOMINATION (201)            30
2. SAND DANCERS (68)           27      MAGIC ARTISTS (292)
3. SUPER SCIENCE (310)         10      Unchartered Team
4. MAGIC ARTISTS (292)          7
5. EARL'S TAVERN (100)        -17      SUPER SCIENCE (310)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 1*SUPER SCIENCE (310)        4   1  0 80.0   1/ 1 SAND DANCERS (68)         6  6 0
 2/ 2 MAGIC ARTISTS (292)       22   9  0 71.0   2/ 3 DOMINATION (201)          6  9 0
 3/ 3 DOMINATION (201)          32  20  2 61.5   3/ 2 MAGIC ARTISTS (292)       5  3 0
 4/ 4 SAND DANCERS (68)        630 791 22 44.3   4/ 4*SUPER SCIENCE (310)       1  1 0
 5/ 0*EARL'S TAVERN (100)        8  11  0 42.1   5/ 0*EARL'S TAVERN (100)       1  4 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

     (It started over a month ago)

     As Roadkill started towards the guild house he was so disappointed with the
condition of the area he was looking at.  What was once a prominent establishment had
now reduced itself to a gutter house that most would pass by with out even a second
look.   He wasn't sure what bothered him more...the fact that his guildhouse was in
shambles or the fact that no one seemed to care.
     "Things are about to change," he announced as he sent the front door into
     "Just who the hell are....  Boss, is that really you????"
     "Damn right Wild Thang, and things have just taken a turn for the worse and you
this rag-tag group you decided to represent the Street Walkers.  I'm back and I'm not
happy with the fact that you have let this place to turn into ruins.  The reason for
our success here is because managers sent to sent their warriors here to spy on how
we were training.  Those who came for extra-curricular activities were of no
consequence...plain and simple."


     "All right, now that everyone knows what's expected of them I assume that will
be no problems."
     "But boss, now that Wild Thang has graduated we have no one with any power to
lead the team."
     "Please...Wild Thang would drop like a rock if a fly landed on her, and now I
need you, You Mama, to lead a strong front while I'm away."
     "ME??????  You can't be serious...what to I know about leading a team?"
     "It won't be for long there is a new arena opening up that forbids having
fighters with tourney experience, DYO's, or any modified warriors at all."
     "So how does that pertain to us?"
     "It doesn't, this is the chance for some of us old-school managers to get back
to what really got us hooked in the first place.  After the last tourney I realized
that times have changed in the tourney ranking.  This team will allow a 3 FE to
actually challenge a 3 FE without having to worry about that fighter really  having
33 FE because of tourney.  It's simply put best as what you see is what you
challenge.  They even have a new arena in 81 that is open to all players as long as
they abide by a few simple rules...no tourney warriors, and run a full team.  That's
the basics and a rotating commission is set up to enforce the basic rules."
     "So what if someone breaks the rules and sent someone to a tourney?"
     "That warrior is sent to the dark arena until dead...period."
     "I'm going just simple because this may be the one of the final attempts to save
some basic arenas."
     "I love the basic play, personal ads, spotlights, conflict, and fun.  I
encourage all managers to think about joining if they are willing to except the rules
of the arena."
     "Until, then I'm off to establish a new team in 81 and try to persuade the
Visionist, Oremaster, Tex, Vlad, and Slowburn (if I can find them) into returning to
make Lapur the envy of arenas the way is way oh so long ago."
     "Until that happens, may your blades strike true, if you end up fighting
me....chances are we'll be in for all sorts of fun."

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                                 A Relative Returns
                        By:  Dominic Spinella AKA Master Beru

     "Are we ready then?"
     His eyes searched the faces around him for signs of hesitation and fear.  They
knew what they faced and had not shrunk back at any point since they had first
traveled.  His brown eyes took in the faces and wondered which he would not see
     Sherman was the only one who had received Sheila's blessing before they left, so
there would be no resurrection for those that fell.
     There were less than two thousand now.  To think that he had entered that first
gate with almost a hundred thousand so long ago and now it was only these few.
Visions of that first trip through the gate were quickly running through his mind.
He quickly forced those images to the deepest recesses of his mind as Rodara turned
toward him.  Her red hair was like a sunrise just begun with orange and red mixing
together to bring a sense of peace and war all at once.  Her delicate face held a
commanding stare as she worked out the logistics of carrying those he had found to
safety, but his mind saw that playful smile which lightened his heart and made the
men sigh contentedly.  The robes she wore were as threadbare as any other's, even
though their army had demanded that she be kept well clothed and fed.  She still
managed to step around their wishes and suffer the same hardships as those around
her, and never once complained.  Her head turned as his gaze lingered and rewarded
him with the small public smile which hinted at their shared memories.  He grinned
and gave her a wink, before walking up to the tree stump which had been cut off to
provide a rough platform.  As he stepped onto the space at the top, the men and women
who made up their force let out a cheer which grew and grew.  The adoration swept
over him as he let them have their moment.  Togan had always said that common men
needed something miraculous to inspire them, and where the miraculous failed, a king
or general had to suffice.  He tried to remember how close he was to the anniversary
of his advisor's death and could only narrow it to at least five years ago.  As he
ran into difficulty figure out more, he raised his hands to silence those around him.
"BROTHERS AND SISTERS!!"  The cheering went up again at the familiar form of address.
They remembered his promise at the beginning, as well as Greywand's promise on top of
it.  They were already his brothers and sisters in many ways, and soon they would be
more.  "Brothers and Sisters, we have almost come full circle.  Over the second ridge
behind you lays the gate which will take us back to Alastari!"
     Another cheer went up as the realization crashed home to the rank and file.
Rumors had been rampant for most of the year as they had traveled, but this was his
first acknowledgement that they were going home.  Many eyes suddenly held tears of
joy and many people hugged the ones beside them.  Some of the faces wore sadness
though, as thoughts of those who were not with the group came to mind.  "In minutes,
we will form up to step off for the last time.This time though....  This time we have
no rear guard.  We have the main line, the defenders, and the reserves.  All of us
fight to return to our families and friends.  All of us fight to bring Greywand her
prizes!  We all fight FOR ALASTARI!!!"  Cheers went up as weapons were raised.  The
group was battle hardened now and knew what they faced so bravado was not present.
Every mind knew that they might not see the next day, but if they did, they would see
Alastari.  If they did not see tomorrow, then they could pave the way for their
friends and, in many instances, lovers.  "We know our fight will be tough, but I tell
you now that we will make it.  With our home ahead and certain death behind, we
cannot help but to take the gate.  And now I can share something else with you.  The
'key' that Greywand gave me, it will destroy the gate behind us so that we must
merely reach the gate and pass through and our fight is through.  Now we do not know
what the other side will hold, so we must still be wary, but we know what Alastari
offers much more than we know this place, correct?"  Another cheer was raised and it
was obvious that those listening were almost done.  Rosemary, Jason, Picker, Sherman,
and on and on and on the names went.  "For the Blue Falcon!  For Greywand!  FOR
ALASTARI!!!"  The chant was raised and his small army showed all evidence of being
ready to march.  Looking at his Captains, he nodded at them.  Within seconds they
sprang into action yelling and occasionally thumping those too slow in their
opinions.  Tents began collapsing as the campsite disappeared, one dome at a time.
Returning to the ground, Master Beru was walking to his wife when he spotted his most
trusted Captain approaching.  Freddie was amazing in a fight and had a great rapport
with all of the soldiers.  Perhaps when they got back, they would be able to get him
back in the arena.  That would bring back fond memories.  Stopping in front of Master
Beru, the man bowed deeply before taking up his stance.  He looked ready to kill in a
blink, which was always useful in this horrible place.  Master Beru wondered if he
would have liked Freddie before being sent here.  Although an interesting exercise in
logic, it was irrelevant now that he felt Freddie had grown to be a brother to him.
     "Freddie.  You will have the reserve unit.  I know you like leading the charge,
but this is more important.  Motioning with his hand, Master Beru moved away from
others and pulled out the small device which he had carefully guarded for almost
fifteen years.  The slim device was round and flat on two sides, the entire piece
being as thick as his hand and just barely larger than the same.  Adjusting a small
control which he had practiced many times, he actually set up the device the way he
had been shown so long ago.  They walked and talked at the same time with Master Beru
pointing out how the device worked.  "This is the key to getting us out of here.
When I see a break, I will point you toward it and you WILL make a hole there for us
to escape through.  Once the hole is made, you will keep their guardians off us as we
leave and then you will bring your soldiers through with you.  I am attuning this to
both of us.  If either of us says 'SHESTNI ABRIN TAIREGORE' the gate with destroy
itself.  I will only say it if everyone is through or if their guardians are charging
through the gate.  For you....  You will have to decide when you feel it best to use
the phrase if the time comes.  Be aware, I have only one device, so after the phrase
is said, the gate will be gone and even if you found another gate, there would be no
way to open it.  So, I will not order you."
     "You have never ordered me.  You never questioned my courage before, please do
not now.  I will volunteer for this task.  You and Sheila's prizes will get through.
You have my oath on it.  And I will make sure that none of the Warlord's guardians
enter Alastari, that you have my oath on as well.  And if possible, the rest of the
army will be given time to fight clear."  Master Beru's gaze took in the strong chin
and decisive stare fondly.  This man was a gem, even if no one else had ever seen it.
It was truly a blessing to find someone with such a pure heart and desire to serve.
As the general he had to make the hard decisions and this was one he wished he could
avoid, but the facts were too evident.  Freddie was their best chance of returning to
Alastari.  They had to win. "Freddie, thank you.  The first round of drinks are mine
when we return to Lapur."
     "I'll hear none of it.  It isn't decent for a general to have to buy a round of
drinks when his Captain is sitting there.  Now you better get back there before the
entire lot of them decides to leave without you."  Master Beru lingered for a moment
and saw the same unspoken reassurances.  Reaching out his arm, he clasped Freddie's
right hand and arm and gave it a squeezing handshake. Turning on his heel, he marched
off, shouting orders to get the soldiers formed up.  Behind him, Master Beru did not
see the sigh or the longing look that Freddie directed at Rosemary.  His face twisted
for a moment before he brought it under control again.  As he strode toward the
Reserve unit, he pushed aside the thought of letting his lieutenant know about his
change of duty.  She would be mad, but at least she would have a chance.  He could
not bring the woman he loved to a certain death.
     "Okay, gather around.  Across the next rise, approximately three thousand Jusi
Mein Taur, warriors of the society of the spear, stand between us and the gate.
These are well trained, first line troops of the Warlord with moderate armor, spears
for distance, and a sword similar to a broadsword for close combat.  They have good
morale and at least three officers, so they are not likely to break when we
     Master Beru looked at his officers as he talked.  The light-hearted banter from
an hour ago was buried beneath the boulders of responsibility which each carried.  He
knew their mettle and was reassured to see their attentiveness.  With great care, he
laid out his plan.  A few questions came here and there, but the plan was fairly
     Dismissing the officers, Master Beru stayed to answer last minute questions.  As
the questions wrapped up, he caught the tail-end of some heated words between Freddie
and Rosemary.  He did not hear much, but could read their looks well enough.  He had
once been concerned about having both male and female soldiers, but given the amount
of time they had been gone he had long since gotten over that.  Apparently soldiers
were not the only ones to have found solace in each other's arms.  For a moment he
considered countermanding his earlier order, but he knew that their best chance lay
with Freddie holding the gate while the rest fled into it.  He would have stayed
himself, but his orders had been clear.  Greywand herself had made it very clear that
his role was to be a leader and advisor, not a primary combatant.  No more danger
than necessary was to be risked by him, that's what his men were for.  With an effort
he turned away and walked to his Cat-aar.  The animal looked too much like a horse at
times, but the blue, red, and yellow which were their natural colors always helped
bring him to the true facts.  It had only taken a few weeks for their horses to die
upon entering this strange domain and learning to use the Cat-aar had taken quite a
while, but they were better for it.  As he patted her long neck, Isben looked back at
Master Beru expectantly, smiling through the razor sharp teeth which enabled her to
eat meat and serve as an excellent means of attack as well.  Grabbing the extra
length of strap, he climbed up into the saddle, taking the reins in his hands.
Pulling back on the reins, Isben rose up on her hind legs allowing Master Beru a look
around.  The soldiers were lining up in five blocks as he had ordered with the two
most important between the two in front and one in back.  "We eat now?"
     Turning his head slightly, Master Beru took one hand off the reins to scratch
behind Isben's ear.  Her face held an eagerness that would have seemed right on a
child, but the topic made innocence impossible.  She was always hungry as near as he
could tell, but she kept her appetites hidden well.  Unfortunately when she sensed
that she was about to eat she did not hide her appetites at all.
     "Yes Isben.  We eat soon.  Will your sisters join us again?"
     "We make a feast?"
     "I think we shall.  Will they help prepare?"
     I will invite them!  Silver shells, too?!"
     "Silver shells are not to be prepared!!  I fear some may make the feast, but
your sisters may not prepare them."
     Her face looked slightly hurt, but more frustrated.  She always asked the same
question about being able to eat Master Beru's dead soldiers and was always mad that
he burned their bodies.  But he had only made the mistake once of consenting to
allowing silver shells as part of their feast.   The surviving soldiers had almost
revolted right then, not to mention the nightmares which still haunted him after
twelve years.  Cat-aars were messy eaters and tore their food apart to get to the
'most sweet spots'.  The incident had taken weeks to smooth with the soldiers, not to
mention his own conscience.  The feel of his hands made his stomach roll as the
memory of 'catching' a half-eaten head came back to his mind.  Isben had been shaking
the young officer's body when it suddenly snapped off and flew straight as a shot at
him.  His first instinct was to catch it and he would never forget the poor woman's
eyes, dead already, but still accusingly staring at him as Isben asked for the 'top'
back.  Her eyes held a gleam now, as she enthusiastically asked, "You mean we can
have silver shells?"
     "Isben, when the gate is gone, you may eat silver shells who are prepared.  But
you must finish dark shells and softies before silver shells.  Understood?"  Her nod
was a small recompense for the agreement, but it might help them escape.  No one
would remain to burn the corpses anyway, so he might as well get a concession for the
Cat-aars.  That's what he told himself, he did not belief it though.
     "Sir, we are ready!"  Looking at his soldiers, he wondered again whether this
had been worth the cost.  So many lost and so much of his life gone.  Greywand must
surely have a reason for this.  Surely....

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

     I am surprised to be Duelmaster.  I have a long, long way from being close to
being this good, but I am quite willing to accept all luck.  I can truthfully say
this must be an illusion.
     While I am out on a limb in this position, I must also offer that I believe it
is a national illusion to think that Ohio State is number one.  Egads!
          Illusionist, Duelmaster

                                      SPY REPORT

     Greetings warriors!  It is I, Zontani Sharp Eyes, here to bring report of the 
clash and bustle of the weekly LIN TIRIAN games.  MEDICINE MAN caught the eye of many 
in the gladiatorial commission as he skillfully bested DA PAINTED LADY and was 
awarded 17 points in recognition.  In one of the week's more notable duels, 
NECROMANCER put down DA DANCIN GIRL, causing her to lose 9 points of recognition in 
the process.  The city has turned out in honor of JIGGER KREE, for with his arena 
victory he may now lay claim to the highest position in the city!  Heed this!  A seer 
has warned that if exactly 6 die in duels this week, the whole city shall perish!  
Just remember...5 or 7!   
     But come now, let us look deeper into the maze of contention and crossed blades 
that is city LIN TIRIAN.  LIN TIRIAN, city of gladiators!  Mighty among the names of 
thy guilds is SAND DANCERS, a guild shunned and avoided by many in the weekly duels.  
Methinks more than a few here could name the guild it was that spent the better part 
of last week avoiding SAND DANCERS.  Indeed it was MAGIC ARTISTS.   
     What warrior does not hone his years, impatiently waiting for the moment of his 
foe's mortality?  This week marked the last days of ROGAR THORFIN who at 6-5-1 was 
dispatched to the Dark Arena by the command of DOMINATION's demanding management.  
Fate is a fickle mistress.  She showers the miserable with fortune but sets enemies 
against the victorious.  Remember this!   
     If it were not for my skills as a spy I would have been mugged three times 
already in LIN TIRIAN.  Nice atmosphere you have here!  Sadly warriors, now longer 
can I keep thy company nor savor the ale of thy fine city.  Depart I must and soon!  
Till we meet again, remember:  a turtle walks slow, hides head in a shell, and harms 
no one; a lion runs to slay its prey.-- Zontani Sharp Eyes  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 JIGGER KREE 2631             18  29  0   104       SAND DANCERS (68)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 ILLUSIONIST 2511              9   1  0    78       MAGIC ARTISTS (292)
 OLAF THORFIN 1720             9   2  0    75       DOMINATION (201)
 SHANA THE KNIFE 2663         14  19  0    69       SAND DANCERS (68)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 CHALBAEG 2705                 9  11  2    62       SAND DANCERS (68)
 ABJURER 2534                  4   2  0    57       MAGIC ARTISTS (292)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-CONJURER 2512                 3   2  0    49       MAGIC ARTISTS (292)
 OOKLA THE MOK 2719            4   1  0    47       SUPER SCIENCE (310)
 NECROMANCER 2520              4   1  0    45       MAGIC ARTISTS (292)
 MIRIAL ADAMANT 2729           6   2  1    35       SAND DANCERS (68)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 MEDICINE MAN 2734             2   0  0    27       MAGIC ARTISTS (292)
 DA DANCIN GIRL 859            2   1  0    24       EARL'S TAVERN (100)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SOLDIER 1 2733                2   0  0    23       DOMINATION (201)
 ROLLO THORFIN 2732            1   1  0    13       DOMINATION (201)
 DA CHAMPEEN 837               1   0  0    13       EARL'S TAVERN (100)
 DA PAINTED LADY 828           3   1  0    10       EARL'S TAVERN (100)
 DA BOUNSA 829                 1   3  0     6       EARL'S TAVERN (100)
 DA OTHA BARKEEP 869           1   1  0     4       EARL'S TAVERN (100)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
ROGAR THORFIN 2255     6  6 1 DOMINATION 201        MISTRESS MIGONELLE 23 337 NONE    
DA2 2735               0  1 0 DOMINATION 201        WURM KIN 27           337 NONE    

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Domination and Super Science -- Hello.  And a tip of the hat to the Sand Dancers.
Please forgive me if I pull a disappearing act now and then. -- Houdini, Mgr. Magic

Dumbfounded!  I have no idea how Illusionist does that!  Jigger Kree and Sand
Dancers, what more can I say.  Magic! -- Houdini

Olaf Thorfin -- You were way too much Orc for me! -- Conjurer

Ookla and Crew -- Now we couldn't let you win them all, could we? -- Abjurer

STILL WALK, THE NEXT FIVE SHOTS ARE FREE!! -- Master Beru, Mgr. and Proprietor of
Earl's Tavern

       (I reserve the right to give special prices if I wanna!)
    1 Minute with me = 20 Apples
    2 Minutes with me = 20 Oranges
    3-5 Minutes with me = 20 Silk Dresses
    6+ Minutes with me = A Small Farm
       (Remember, I choose the weapons and Ladies first!!)
                -- Da Painted Lady

To all those who would paw at me while I am dancin -- I keep a nice stout club handy
and don't mind using it if you get too...friendly!! -- Da Dancin' Girl

Yeah, and I will crack you head up nice 2! -- Da Bouncer

Now <HIck> NOW <hICk> That is <Belch>  Ooh, that burns <bURP!!>  Oh, better.
Barkeep!  Another drink!! -- Da Champeen

<Hands an ale to Da Champ with a sigh>  Okay, if that did not scare you off, come on
over and belly up to the bar.  I might not know your name, but that don't matter if
you can see over the bar.  (Or if you have a big enough weapon....)  I guess the
first round is on the house. -- Da Otha Barkeep

Illusionist -- Good work.  I never even knew you were there, I mean, I knew you were
in the arena, but I didn't know you were THERE, I thought you were way over THERE.
 And then, whammo!  A blow out of nowhere. -- Jigger Kree

I could've taken down that old Kung-Fu Master if they'd let me do the fight in an
alley, and sneak up on him with my best knife. -- Shana the Knife

It was an amazing pleasure to take down the Dishonest Judge.  It was one just like
him who sent me here, you know.  I'm actually innocent of wrong-doing.  I was framed.
It just fell into my hand. -- Chalbaeg

     They all say that.

There are too many Dangerous Criminals in this arena. -- Mirial Adamant

Houdini -- Mighty Mouse would have been okay, if he saved the day.  But you'll do! --

2 November 2006
I received a Gift Certificate from someone.  I'm assuming it's for entry into the
Turf War 5.  Whoever sent this to me...please email me at rbaphomets@yahoo.com.

10 November 2006
     The Quest of the Best has come to an end.  Dark Knight Toker, host of the Quest,
wants to proclaim the Ultimate Victor and give a listing of prize winners.
     Lady Fern and her Flower Girls of the Consortium are the Ultimate Victors of the
Quest.  Well fought and there's nothing like coming from behind to leave us all in
the dust.  Can't wait to see you defend your title! (wink)
     Here is a complete list of managers who placed in prize positions:

1)  Lady Fern, mgr. Flower Girls
2)  Le Pentarque, mgr. Blood & Guts!
3)  Crip, mgr. Otto's Parts
4)  D.K. Heathen Hatebred, mgr. Odin's Chosen
5)  Ghab, mgr. Assassin Nation
6)  Fanthayne, mgr. Dark Raiders
7)  D.K. Toker, mgr. Silver Knights
8)  D.K. Wasby, mgr. Bronze Knights
9)  The Expatriate, mgr. Bleak Legion
10) Still the Distilled, mgr. Springborne Fair

     Thanks to all that had the gall to show up, but I really want to thank the
managers that had the mettle to survive and not run when they started getting their
butt handed to them.
                                                           Respect to All.
                                                           Quest #1 host,
                                                           Dark Knight Toker

14 November 2006
                                      A Tale of
                        Fusion Confusion Delusion Revolution
                                     as told by
                                Hammer the WordSmith

     SomeWhere Beyond ElseWhere and ElseWhen a hooded figure brooded upon the
lingering wisps of memory from days gone by.
     From the howling sands to the sanding howls the streams of thought bubbled and
flowed, winding endlessly entwined within the darkest recesses and lightest resources
of the learned and unlearned disciplines of managerial mayhem and manipulation.
     Nameless faces and faceless names floated in the swirling mists of madness
embalmed within the memories of one who knew he did not know how far reaching the
influences [both positive and negative] had rooted and flowered in the march of time
and energy expended in the historical markings of gladiatorial essence and excellence
     The tamed and the untamed coupled with the named and the unnamed resources that
spilt their sweat and blood on the sands of arenas both known and unknown had
metamorphosed into the dreamings and the schemings of the fadings of jadings and
paradings [in both public and private] amongst the elite and the indiscreet
posturings and babblings of managers becoming legends in their own minds and times.
     Hammer pondered upon beginnings and the seemingly endless myriad of endings
possibly possible among the interspersed and intertwined impossible possibilities
presently past and future.
     Echoing and reechoing in the vast depths and countless compartments along the
corridors of his mind, Hammer played and replayed the glories shared and dared in the
sixty-plus stabled arena on fabled Noblish Island DM 93.
     The training had been all too brief, but the competition generated by the multi
faceted personages inhabiting DM 93 and the sheer multitude of numbers had forever
instilled themselves in the heart and soul of the veteran manager [Hammer]; insomuch
that the migration to Niatoli Island DM 33 triggered the desire to emulate the glory
and the grandeur of the spectacle of stables vying for recognition from among the
virtually numberless no-name newbies making names for themselves as they numbered
their stables and accomplishments for all to see and behold, to the song and the
sound of the sight of clashing cold cruel steel simmering the flesh of gallant
gladiators consumed by the gory and the glory of crossing blades with the superior
and the inferior within the interior of Greywand's Global Gladiatorial Galaxy.
     Far far ago and long long away had many abandoned hope for a return to the
reminiscences revered by so many managers; predating even the generations of
gladiators graduating from Noblish Island and the years of yore and gore and
gallantry before.
     Rumblings and mumblings of a renovation rejuvenating the reflexes of managers
numbed by the numberless trysts of tourney tarnished stables began revolutionizing
the very fabric of time and space and time-honored tradition throughout the ranks of
visionary newbies and volatile veterans alike and dislike.
     History was being shaken to the core of the gore as glory and grandeur responded
to the revelry reverie revelations and reveille revolutionizing the creation of a new
arena in the making; populated by No-Tourney Warriors and Full Stable Participants
pledging to forge a new vision version of "The Fiercest and Best" for crossing blades
and crosser banter in the personal ads and team spotlight tomes.
     Now was the time for Hammer to emerge and once again merge his talent among the
gifted and grifted; answering the call to assemble the drifted [and to directly
divulge and converge with the dozens] for the destiny of destructive denizens
determined to build a new legacy upon the all-but-forgotten ashes of the old and
olden legends of times lost.
         [TIME JUMP]
     Hammer sifted the sands in the dead of night in the desert reaches [located
SomeWhere BeYond ElseWhere and ElseWhen] to discover 5 gladiators not tourney worthy,
yet interesting enough to begin their careers in a No-Tourney Arena!
     "They need not be dispatched to the Dark Arena," the veteran manager mused as he
sorted through paperwork long discarded and vaguely forgotten, "because there is
nothing like a good Blood Feud to provide inspiration for writing personal ads in the
arena newsletter! Besides, there are times when the replacement for a warrior wounded
mortally on the arena sands fares much better than the one exchanged from Torch
     Fights by Torch Light were certainly deemed unnecessary as Hammer had already
deduced that a number of determined stables would undoubtedly congregate with High
Octane Warriors under the guidance of Higher Octane Managers to populate and
depopulate the new No-Tourney Arena currently under construction in DM 81.
     Fortunately his feeble foray into the desert would yield somewhat suitable
candidates for the newfound purposes Hammer had in mind.
     From among the candidates to be found Hammer would be rewarded in time by
     Deep into the night Hammer searched and searched until five not-so-promising
stables were uncovered in the waning hours before dawn.
     Ripper discards were scattered far and wide, but this was not the time or the
hour to let sentimental views cloud the issue at hand.  Future events would lend
themselves to a suitable Ripper replacement, especially with the prospects Hammer was
now sorting for his selection decision to dispatch to the Gladiatorial Commission for
     Most managers have the luxury of selecting the best group [or discarding the
worst group!] Hammer had the novelty of rounding up the castaways from the New
Stables paperwork accumulated long ago from Maximillian's Morya Madness contest in DM
28 that were deemed below inferior as contest prizes [and thus banished from sight!]
     Hammer scrutinized and agonized over which group of gladiators were worth the
sacks of gold coins he was prepared to release to the Gladiatorial Commission for
fees to MAINTENANCE his new stable in the No-Tourney Arena.
     After what seemed like long hours passing by, Hammer discarded one and then
another group of hopefuls.  After lengthy debate a third was cast aside.  Deciding
between the final two groups found Hammer going back to interview the rejected
candidates time and time again [until a final decision was made that Hammer could
live with and his new stable could die with!] before the final quirks were hammered
out and pen put to paper to process the prospective puny stable with the Gladiatorial
     The only solace gained from the painful process was the knowledge that other
managers would be less tempted to run stables in DM 81 populated by their tourney-
worthy warriors [under the penalty of death imposed and enforced upon tourney
experienced gladiators by the Committee being formed to police and regulate such
matters!] as sworn to and signed in good faith by each registering manager.
         [TIME JUMP]
     Hammer had worked long and hard to find suitable candidates for his stable and
now it was time to begin their training.  The paperwork had been dispatched for
registration with the Gladiatorial Commission and now was the hour in which
preparation was paramount!
     Dispatch riders had arrived with the news that Considerable Bounty was being
offered as incentive rewards to those managers sending new stables to the No-Tourney
     Hammer realized this would Up the Ante [causing greater pause in the managerial
community for selecting suitable stables!] as the creative competition was certain to
escalate and produce Serious Sword Slinging Stables Staining the Arena Sands Red!
     Obviously a serious upgrade in the quality of competition migrating to the No-
Tourney Arena in DM 81 would definitely work in favor of Hammer; enormously
increasing the death toll percentage potential amongst the ranks of his new start-up
stable in DM 81 [Sands Running Red and Blood Feuds Running Rampant as Undoubtedly
     Hammer observed the futility of his new warriors training [as well as they could
for what they were made from!] while recent memories came to the forefront of his
     When the paperwork was nearly completed and names were selected for each
Gladiator, Hammer decided to name the stable according to what he had discovered in
the darkness while searching during the dismal hours of the desert night.
     These warriors would probably be more well suited to fight by Torch Light had
they fallen into the possession of most other managers!
     Paper Warriors better suited to confronting Dark Arena Monsters [rather than
being fed to the Gladiatorial Lions certain to be populating the regular No-Tourney
     Specimens blatantly better suited for feeding upon agitated armadillo ants than
for striving to attain recognition and fame in the No-Tourney Arena [or any arena!]
     Thus was AARDVARK HAMMERZ birthed and born for Greatness or Disgrace!
         [TIME JUMP]
     Dispatch riders on winged steeds brought the news Hammer had been awaiting!
     Not since the days of training on Noblish Island in DM 93 had Hammer encountered
such collective enthusiasm for crossing blades in a selected arena such as DM 81
[recalling the time Hammer generated a gathering of newbies to transfer to Niatoli
Island in DM 33 to match wits and cross blades with the assembling veterans upon
     The Consortium had represented the veterans well in DM 33 with the SWEETNESS
stable managed by Sweety Pie.  Now the good news had arrived that The Consortium was
seen registering a stable named LIFE IMPACTS in the No-Tourney Arena!
     Former alliance mates Darque and Kat had reportedly registered DARQUE AGES and
KATHOUSE with the Gladiatorial Commission.
     Morya Madness combatant LePentarque from DM 28 had registered LA PENTARCHIE and
longtime fixture Drake in North Fork DM 47 [recently returned from a lengthy hiatus]
had been lured by the competition to register DRAKE'S HARDWARE.
     Deke [at the helm of DOC LEGRAND'S LAB] was instrumental in promoting the No-
Tourney Arena by repeatedly negotiating terms with the Gladiatorial Commission.
Others had laid the groundwork before him, but Deke raised the banner and carried it
the final distance [Supported by Countless Managers too numerous to mention!] Salute
Yourselves for Your Efforts are Most Graciously Applauded throughout Alastari!
     Apex had signed in with CAROLINA BLUE as had Ghab with ASSASSIN NATION.
     Another familiar name was found on the rolls as DeGotti registered CULT OF
BACCHUS followed by DOOM KNIGHTS managed by Blackstorm.
     Also on the rolls to be noted were AS SEEN ON TV II managed by Indimar and
RAGNAROK'S WOLVES by none other than ragnorokwolf.
     Nomad had signed on with PHANTOM REGIMENT and Silas followed suit with
     Another notable signature was that of MasterBeru with CHILDHOOD HEROES and a
penchant for scribing Team Spotlights [A Plus in Any Arena!]
     Detective Kellumbo had followed the clues and was observed enroute to
registering a yet unannounced stable [such are the ways of sleuthhounds and such!]
     Rumor had it that the manager known as Roadkill was on his way to register a
stable after his namesake and Slugbait was close behind [obliviously lost in
     Finally [in no particular disorder!] managers Grimm, Woody, Terminator, Den and
Bill were also seen elbowing their way through the gathering registration crowd to
officially announce their participation in the No-Tourney Arena.
     COUNTLESS OTHER MANAGERS were known to be pondering the consequences of sending
stables to a No-Tourney Arena and had yet to make the commitment public knowledge as
to their intentions.
     Howbeit the Gladiatorial Commission was reportedly swamped with requests for New
Stable Registration Forms [whether for the Tempe Facer or No-Tourney Arena was
anybody's guess at the present time!]
     Judging from the furtive figures darting and ducking in the shadows and
alleyways throughout Alastari [as well as those huddled in taverns or communicating
with one another by various means available!] the success of such a No-Tourney Arena
was Ballooning far Beyond the Expectations of the Promoters and Petitioners Bar None!
had the Best Potential for attracting and assembling a congregation of competitors
rivaling the numbers of Noblish Island from days gone by!
       JANUARY 2007 MARKS THE BEGINNING of a Journey where both Newbies and Veterans
join together in a Historic Assemblage Celebrating the Crossing of Blades between
some of the Best Managed Stables in all of Alastari [Known and Unknown!]
                 "May Your Blades Be Sharp and Your Wits Sharper"
                                          Minister of War

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

ROGAR THORFIN was butchered by MISTRESS MIGONELLE in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
DA2 was butchered by WURM KIN in a 1 minute Dark Arena duel.
OOKLA THE MOK narrowly defeated MIRIAL ADAMANT in a 7 minute Challenge melee.
ILLUSIONIST was demolished by JIGGER KREE in a 1 minute uneven Title fight.
OLAF THORFIN viciously subdued CHALBAEG in a popular 3 minute gory contest.
SHANA THE KNIFE savagely defeated ABJURER in a crowd pleasing 7 minute competition.
NECROMANCER overpowered DA DANCIN GIRL in a 2 minute bloody one-sided struggle.
DA OTHA BARKEEP was viciously subdued by ROLLO THORFIN in a 2 minute beginner's fight.
DA BOUNSA was vanquished by SOLDIER 1 in a 1 minute uneven duel.
DA PAINTED LADY was overpowered by MEDICINE MAN in a 1 minute uneven duel.
DA CHAMPEEN overpowered CONVICTED THIEF in a 1 minute one-sided fight.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                   6         TOTAL PARRY       10 -   2 -  0      83  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  3         LUNGING ATTACK    19 -   7 -  0      73  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     2         WALL OF STEEL      7 -   3 -  1      70  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    2         AIMED BLOW         4 -   2 -  1      67  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  2         PARRY-LUNGE        1 -   1 -  0      50  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      1         BASHING ATTACK     1 -   1 -  0      50  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      1         SLASHING ATTACK    6 -   7 -  0      46  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   1         PARRY-STRIKE       8 -  13 -  0      38  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    1         STRIKING ATTACK    3 -   5 -  0      38  |
|AIMED BLOW                       0         PARRY-RIPOSTE      5 -   9 -  0      36  |

Turn 337 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-LUNGE        1 -  0     SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  2         3  PARRY-RIPOSTE  
TOTAL PARRY        1 -  0     AIMED BLOW         0 -  0         2  PARRY-STRIKE   
PARRY-STRIKE       1 -  1     BASHING ATTACK     0 -  1         2  LUNGING ATTACK 
PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -  1     WALL OF STEEL      0 -  1         1  TOTAL PARRY    
LUNGING ATTACK     3 -  3                                       1  STRIKING ATTACK
STRIKING ATTACK    1 -  1                                       1  WALL OF STEEL  
                                                                1  SLASHING ATTACK

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
LUNGING ATTACK   ILLUSIONIST 2511            9   1  0   78 MAGIC ARTISTS (292)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    ABJURER 2534                4   2  0   57 MAGIC ARTISTS (292)

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
TOTAL PARRY      OOKLA THE MOK 2719          4   1  0   47 SUPER SCIENCE (310)
STRIKING ATTACK  NECROMANCER 2520            4   1  0   45 MAGIC ARTISTS (292)
WALL OF STEEL    MIRIAL ADAMANT 2729         6   2  1   35 SAND DANCERS (68)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is JIGGER KREE 2631.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was SHANA THE KNIFE 2663.  The ten other most popular fighters were OLAF THORFIN 
KREE 2631, SOLDIER 1 2733, MEDICINE MAN 2734, DA2 2735, and ILLUSIONIST 2511.

The least popular fighter this week was DA PAINTED LADY 828.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were DA BOUNSA 829, DA OTHA BARKEEP 869, DA DANCIN GIRL 859, OOKLA 
DA2 2735, and MEDICINE MAN 2734.

The following warriors will travel to AD after next turn: