DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER

Date   : 03/25/2009    Duedate: 04/07/2009

SHADOWSPIRE ARENA

DM-81    TURN-58

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

GURG
4-LETTER CAVEMEN (65)
(81-515) [14-8-0,142]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

GURG                           GARSK
4-LETTER CAVEMEN (65)          PHILANTHROPISTS (85)
(81-515) [14-8-0,142]          (81-892) [6-3-0,56]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

BRUTUS                         BALTAIRE
WARMASTERS (15)                CULT OF BACCHUS (4)
(81-616) [17-14-0,120]         (81-833) [7-4-0,71]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

FURRY FURY (25)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. LA PENTARCHIE (11)          66
2. FURRY FURY (25)             53      KELLUMBO'S KIDS (18)
3. AGGRESSION INC (78)         35      Unchartered Team
4. GOONSWARM (79)              33
5. FUCHI OWNED (54)            31      CORRUPTION (90)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 2*CORRUPTION (90)            7   3  0 70.0   1/ 8 FURRY FURY (25)          11  4 0
 2/ 1 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (18)     177 113  3 61.0   2/21 LA PENTARCHIE (11)       10  5 1
 3/ 3 LA PENTARCHIE (11)       174 113  6 60.6   3/ 5 4-LETTER CAVEMEN (65)    10  5 0
 4/ 4 4-LETTER CAVEMEN (65)     63  47  2 57.3   4/17*AGGRESSION INC (78)       9  6 1
 5/ 5 DRAGONBANE GUILD (13)    165 124  7 57.1   5/10 LITERATE LOONS (40)       9  6 0
 6/ 6 AMERICAN MUSCLE (43)     159 126  7 55.8   6/ 3 OF WOLF AND MAN (57)      9  6 0
 7/10 FURRY FURY (25)           63  50  5 55.8   7/14 AMERICAN MUSCLE (43)      8  7 1
 8/ 7 GOONSWARM (79)            40  32  3 55.6   8/ 1 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (18)      8  7 0
 9/ 8 CULT OF BACCHUS (4)      148 119  6 55.4   9/ 7 FUCHI OWNED (54)          8  7 0
10/11*FRIENDS (84)              11   9  0 55.0  10/ 6 CULT OF BACCHUS (4)       8  7 0
11- 9*THE MOTHERSHIP (83)       21  18  2 53.8  11/ 2 RODENT CLAN (37)          8  7 0
12/13 THE DRAUGS (17)          123 111  6 52.6  12/29*CORRUPTION (90)           7  3 0
13/12 RODENT CLAN (37)         119 111  6 51.7  13/12 WOODY'S WORKSHOP (69)     7  7 0
14/14 THE MONGOLOIDS II (30)    86  84  4 50.6  14/22*PHILANTHROPISTS (85)      7  8 1
15/15 OF WOLF AND MAN (57)     135 134  6 50.2  15/16 WARMASTERS (15)           7  8 0
16/18 WARMASTERS (15)          144 144 14 50.0  16/ 9 UNHOLY KNIGHTS (81)       7  8 0
17/19 FUCHI OWNED (54)         130 131  6 49.8  17/18*IMMORTAL ASYLUM (86)      7  8 0
18/17 CLAN LONGBEARD (39)      143 147  9 49.3  18/ 4 THE MONGOLOIDS II (30)    6  6 0

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
19/22*AGGRESSION INC (78)       22  23  1 48.9  19/13 CLAN LONGBEARD (39)       6  9 1
20/16*PHILANTHROPISTS (85)      22  23  1 48.9  20/20 HOUSE OF HEARTS (56)      6  9 0
21/21 LITERATE LOONS (40)      132 157  3 45.7  21/25 GOONSWARM (79)            6  9 0
22/20*IMMORTAL ASYLUM (86)       9  11  0 45.0  22-15*THE MOTHERSHIP (83)       5  5 0
23/23 HOUSE OF HEARTS (56)      92 113  3 44.9  23/19*THE RED BLADES (88)       5  9 1
24/24 WOODY'S WORKSHOP (69)     58  74  5 43.9  24/11 DRAGONBANE GUILD (13)     5 10 1
25/25 UNHOLY KNIGHTS (81)       30  40  1 42.9  25/24 BIG LAKE OUTCASTS (19)    5 10 0
26/27*THE RED BLADES (88)        8  11  1 42.1  26/32*FRIENDS (84)              3  2 0
27/29 BIG LAKE OUTCASTS (19)   110 153  9 41.8  27/27 ORCAE ITA (80)            3 10 1
28/ 0*WHO'S YOUR MAMA (89)       2   3  0 40.0  28/23*MONSTER MANUAL (87)       3 12 0
29/30 AARP (41)                 89 134  9 39.9  29/33 HUCKLE'S CATS (51)        2  1 1
30/26 ORCAE ITA (80)            27  41  4 39.7  30/30 THE DRAUGS (17)           2  1 0
31-33 WAR MACHINE (26)          39  75  6 34.2  31/ 0*WHO'S YOUR MAMA (89)      2  3 0
32/34 HUCKLE'S CATS (51)        36  74  2 32.7  32/31 AARP (41)                 1  3 0
33/31*MONSTER MANUAL (87)        8  17  0 32.0  33-26 WAR MACHINE (26)          1  3 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

My Associates:
     With Mr. Vito Corleone's new Corruption endeavors in this area, he necessarily
feels it important to protect his assets.  He has directed me, his Consigliere, to
research, review, and recommend.  Perhaps, then, you would be readily willing to
answer the following:
     1. Analysis reveals that strikers and lungers are by far the largest style of
warriors.  Does that mean they stand out as the best investment?
     2. Mr. Kellumbo has the most wins here.  Is he a teacher/philosopher/coach, or
is he a business man like Mr. Corleone?
     3. Are there serious negative intentions towards new investors--or Godfathers--
that must be overcome with an offer that one cannot refuse?
     4. Why are three tens not deemed the best strategy?
     5. If four of the best eleven warriors are walls-of-steel, does that mean walls
are the best warriors after experience?
     6. Is there a cache of stored documents where I might examine history and
instruction to best determine how to optimize The Godfather's investment?
     I thank you for any assistance, and I can assure you The Godfather will return
the service in kind. In the near future, Mr. Corleone will be visiting the area and
will be available for conference. You may arrange said meetings through me.
     I remain,
     Consigliere

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

     Gurg drew his long sword back from Black Maria's arm, sneering at the fallen
warrior beneath him.  The crowd was howling deafeningly already as Maria dropped her
shield, her shoulders slumping as she motioned surrender to the arenamaster.  The
sneer changed to a grin, then Gurg joined the howling, running around the sands not
unlike a crazed caveman.  Even had he not been caught up in the euphoria of the
moment, Gurg could have little recognized the ramifications this moment would have on
his future.

<<the future>>

     Two figures made their way down the streets of Shadowspire.  One, Elephant,
skipped next to the hunched over figure of the other, Hombre, who trudged somberly
alongside, hands dug deep in pockets.  The manager of Fuchi Owned was trying to think
away the sounds of the gay ditty that his shorter compadre whistled, and was being
wholly unsuccessful at it.
     "Why can't I use my supernatural powers to block out his whistling?!!?" Hombre
angrily thought to himself.  The only reply was joyous whistling.  Maddeningly joyous
whistling.
     "My gay whistling is a reflection of the joy I feel at the amazing new recruits
on my team!" Elephant tralala'd gaily.  "In case you weren't sure!"  
     Hombre bit his tongue, holding the wrist of his good arm with his bad as he
struggled to reach for his dirk.  A cooler head prevailed, and Hombre only stopped
for a moment to meet the gaze of Elephant with a knowing stare that could have
petrified a medusa.  Then he continued trudging on to Nuln's house where the party
for Gurg was happening, Elephant skipping behind him, still whistling but much softer
now.

<<more in the futurer>>

     Gurg looked into the mirror, fidgeting in his patent leather black and red suit.
No matter how many times he matted his hair down with his saliva, he just couldn't
get it right.  There was no getting around it: having too much facial and body hair
was a severe social disadvantage.
     "Yer da DM Gurg!" Gurg grunted under his breath, his gaze growing steely and his
nostrils flaring larger than their already enormous size.  "Go be da DM!"
     At that moment a wind blew through the rear of the house, blowing open the
bathroom door and also blowing back Gurg's 'do.  Finally, he had achieved the perfect
pompador!
     Walking into the mix of the party now, he accepted the congratulations and shook
hands, making his way over to Thag at the bar.
     "Dink, Thag!" motioned Gurg, his teammate handing him a double of something
hard.  The two saluted, then downed their glasses.
     "Many girs look at Gurg." Thag commented, staring out at the throng of many
girls that blatantly stood eyeballing Gurg.  There was a long pause.  "Thag want be
DM sum day."
     "Dink Thag!" motioned Gurg, grabbing and downing another drink, then slamming
the glass on the table, he wiped his mouth with one sleeve and walked like a cavepimp
out of the party, rows of women swooning in his wake.

<<a couple minutes later>>

     Gurg stood outside the Sexagon, Shadowspire's hottest new downtown, six-sided
sex club, taking a moment to eye the action from outside.  Kellumbo stumbled out of
the doors, a total parry in each arm.  "Wow." Gurg thought.  "He even date them."
     Pretty soon, as is inevitable if you are a DM, an increasingly agitated mob of
highly attractive women gathered in a ten yard circumference around Gurg.  Gurg
knowing the moment was now, began his best strut towards the front door of the
Sexagon.
     At eight paces the caveman was struck dead in his tracks, his face gaping as he
stared at a billboard he just noticed to his right.  Plastered across it was a
picture of Gurg grinning, then the phrase, "DM...So Easy..."

<<two seconds later>>

     In pitch silence the mob parted to permit a bowed head Gurg to trudge into the
shadows of the streets of Shadowspire, another cautionary tale of the dual edged
sword that is the DM-hood.

--------

Dear Shadowspire,

     To the growing collection of things that people have left on the DM throne, I
leave a giant, nearly immovable rock.
     To the codex, I leave the sum total of my entire body of wisdom, summed up in
one single four letter word: glrk.  (Yes, it's true, 90% of cavespeak either starts
in a 'g' or ends in 'k.')
     I salute Black Maria on a well-fought and exciting match.  If she would indulge
me in a drink sometime, I would love to have a discussion with her on her use of
weaponry.  I am guessing that a "B" somehow turned into an "S."
     Since I was challenged by a wall of steel last turn, I figured I would return
the favor this time out, so that narrows it down to about half the challenger champs.
Gotta run, the boss man hasn't even turned in my strats, laggart.
     Until next we meet, <salute>

     Gurg, DM for a turn
     as translated by Max Von Hammensprechen, PhD in Cave Speakology

                                      SPY REPORT

     Welcome SHADOWSPIRE.  I, Olaf Modeen remember this place well.  Many the fights 
have I fought here.  The celebrations, the disappointments...  Biff!  Pow!  
SHADOWSPIRE watched with glee as KELLUMBO'S KIDS got knocked off top spot by FURRY 
FURY!  You know what they say about the herd of lions who studied a judge...  LA 
PENTARCHIE moved up 19 places, to 2nd.  Who can explain it?  Not you, not me, not 
AGGRESSION INC's opponents, after watching them shoot up the ranks from 17th to 4th.  
You know what they say about the herd of lions who studied a judge...  CORRUPTION 
moved up 17 places, to 12th.  Looking for a good fight, confident, skilled, tough 
opponents.  Well don't look at THE MONGOLOIDS II, cause they dropped by 14.  Ever 
take one of those association tests?  You know, he says black, you say white.  
Water-Lake, Sky-Blue. Try this:  Flop.  DRAGONBANE GUILD!  Some people say I ramble 
too much, I don't say anything relevant.  I repeat myself.  I ramble.  Well FURRY 
FURY moved up 7, to 1st.  What's with CHUPACABRON?  It actually beat 4-LETTER 
CAVEMEN's NURM, and walked away with 29 more points from the fight.  Laughs were big 
at FUCHI OWNED while they watched TING-TING clobber LIBERIUS.  He lost 20 points and 
got bruised from objects thrown from the stands.  Another fighter (PINKY 8-6-3) 
challenged another Duelmaster (GURG 14-8-0).  Life goes on.  PINKY was reminded on 
the sands why GURG is Duelmaster.  I suppose you want to hear some rumors and dirty 
gossip about your fellow fighters?  Tough!   
     Speaking of cowardly avoiders and unfair challenges...  The most avoided team 
was KELLUMBO'S KIDS.  Management must be dealin', as the boys at CORRUPTION ain't 
reelin'!  KELLUMBO'S KIDS' mad!  What do people see in ANGEL HEART?  Hers 11-10-0?  
HOUSE OF HEARTS ain't talkin', but she's got 73 points.  Taunt your opponent QUARTON! 
That was my lucky charm when I was unfairly challenged.  (and by 21 points!)  ANGEL 
HEART should have an easy win.  ANGEL HEART beat QUARTON.  I bet ANGEL HEART could 
beat two-year-olds, too.  Well, BIG LAKE OUTCASTS knows who to set their sights on.  
Keep challenging up 27 points, WIMPY, and I won't have to write about you much 
longer.  GIGI DIVINE always accepts those kind of challenges...  As I expected, GIGI 
DIVINE won WIMPY.  Not to start anything, but, WIMPY, now that you've faced her and 
seen his style, you might try it again!  I hate going to the effort of writing about 
the kind of fights that GARK gets in.  He fights people like FURIOUS FOX, 12 points 
below.  I thought GARK showed great skill and promise when he was bested by FURIOUS 
FOX.  All right, so I slept through it!  Big deal!   
     Warriors of SHADOWSPIRE unite.  You have only your games to lose!  DEATH'S 
MISTRESS looked pretty sick and surprised when she learned UNHOLY KNIGHTS is sending 
her to the Dark Arena!  Whadd'she expect with a 3-10-0?  NURM, with his forgettable 
13-9-0,  was dealt death by CHUPACABRON in a forgettable match.  4-LETTER CAVEMEN 
didn't seem to mind very much.  Someone told CORRIN that WOODY'S WORKSHOP never 
Bloodfeuded, that he'd have an easy kill.  Well, I'm sure whoever misled you is right 
sorry.  Many a warrior has met his fate in a hungover stupor.  You young 
rapscallions, take note!   
     Well, I'm pretty much through.  You guys need to get back practicing.  The end 
of another Spyreport!  That's cause for celebration in my book!  Remember--a good 
fighter needs both good skills and good luck.  Until next time,-- Olaf Modeen  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 GURG 515                     14   8  0   142       4-LETTER CAVEMEN (65)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 CHUPACABRON 284              20  36  2   128       HUCKLE'S CATS (51)
 GRATH 581                    23  12  0   122       OF WOLF AND MAN (57)
 BRUTUS 616                   17  14  0   120       WARMASTERS (15)
 PLASMA CUTTER 626            15  11  0   115       WOODY'S WORKSHOP (69)
 FURIOUS FOX 143              15   9  1   104       FURRY FURY (25)
 '69 STINGRAY 736             12   8  0   101       AMERICAN MUSCLE (43)
 PO'D PANDA 147               13  11  2   100       FURRY FURY (25)
 WILHELM 770                  12   4  1    96       WARMASTERS (15)
 GARK 512                     12  10  0    92       4-LETTER CAVEMEN (65)
 PINKY 809                     8   6  3    92       ORCAE ITA (80)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 GIGI DIVINE 613              19  11  0    90       CULT OF BACCHUS (4)
 THAG 513                     13   9  1    88       4-LETTER CAVEMEN (65)
 GRACCHUS 825                  9   5  1    87       WARMASTERS (15)
 KANODRAUG 786                10   5  2    81       THE DRAUGS (17)
 FALSE TEETH 521              17  27  2    80       AARP (41)
 ANGEL HEART 644              11  10  0    73       HOUSE OF HEARTS (56)
 SLAUGHTER MOUSE 5 595        15   8  4    72       RODENT CLAN (37)
 VERMINDERELLA 605            13   9  0    72       RODENT CLAN (37)
 KRAZED KOALA 748             11   6  0    72       FURRY FURY (25)
 CLARA 666                    10  10  0    72       HOUSE OF HEARTS (56)
 BALTAIRE 833                  7   4  0    71       CULT OF BACCHUS (4)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LIAM O'FLAHERTY 698          14  10  1    66       LITERATE LOONS (40)
 VILE RAT 795                 11   4  0    66       GOONSWARM (79)
 DECAPITATED BILL 838          8   5  0    66       UNHOLY KNIGHTS (81)
 '08 CHALLENGER 920            6   1  1    66       AMERICAN MUSCLE (43)
 PINKY'S PIG BOY 935           5   1  0    63       UNHOLY KNIGHTS (81)
 RYAK RAZORSAW 597            13  21  2    62       BIG LAKE OUTCASTS (19)
 URRIM 901                     6   2  0    59       CLAN LONGBEARD (39)
 RAT IN THE HAT 832            9   3  0    58       RODENT CLAN (37)
 WIMPY 808                     7   7  1    57       ORCAE ITA (80)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 GARSK 892                     6   3  0    56       PHILANTHROPISTS (85)
 TING-TING 776                10   5  0    55       FUCHI OWNED (54)
 YEAR OF THE CAT 765           9   8  0    54       LA PENTARCHIE (11)
 GERTH 665                    11  16  1    53       CLAN LONGBEARD (39)
 ORNERY OCELOT 144            11  13  0    52       FURRY FURY (25)
 H.P. LOVECRAFT 692            7  18  0    52       LITERATE LOONS (40)
 WEE BEASTIE 864               8   2  1    51       UNHOLY KNIGHTS (81)
 ST JOHN KITTEN 840            8   5  0    48       LA PENTARCHIE (11)
 ANGERED APE 749              11   6  0    45       FURRY FURY (25)
 BAHBI 621                     6   6  1    45       THE MONGOLOIDS II (30)
 '68 ROAD RUNNER 747          12   7  0    44       AMERICAN MUSCLE (43)
 BOWTIE BOB 930                3   2  0    44       FUCHI OWNED (54)
 SLEDGE 629                    8  18  1    43       WOODY'S WORKSHOP (69)
 BILI 622                      6   6  1    42       THE MONGOLOIDS II (30)
 DURG 531                     10  10  0    40       4-LETTER CAVEMEN (65)
 QUARTON 827                   8   6  0    40       BIG LAKE OUTCASTS (19)
 SPIREWOLF 768                10   7  2    39       DRAGONBANE GUILD (13)
 TIN SNIPS 772                 7   9  0    39       WOODY'S WORKSHOP (69)
 ONYB ENGLVAR 903              5   3  0    39       PHILANTHROPISTS (85)
-BLOODY JAKE 369               9  10  1    38       WAR MACHINE (26)
 MELISSA JOAN 730              8   7  0    38       HOUSE OF HEARTS (56)
 MEDA 854                      7   3  0    38       CULT OF BACCHUS (4)
-TROG 466                      7   6  0    37       WAR MACHINE (26)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 '71 MACH ONE 952              3   2  0    35       AMERICAN MUSCLE (43)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LIBERIUS 824                  8   6  2    33       WARMASTERS (15)
 KILLER SMILE 783              6   3  1    33       AGGRESSION INC (78)
 OVERKILL 781                  5   4  0    33       AGGRESSION INC (78)
 BONE SHAMAN 961               3   1  0    33       THE RED BLADES (88)
 AVERAGE JOE 887               5   4  0    32       LA PENTARCHIE (11)
 ST. GEORGE 902                3   5  1    32       DRAGONBANE GUILD (13)
 DJEREE THE DJERK 623          8   4  0    31       THE MONGOLOIDS II (30)
 OWL-EYES 851                  6   5  1    31       FUCHI OWNED (54)
 DUNNIK 900                    5   3  0    30       CLAN LONGBEARD (39)
 SYE THE BEARDED 801           7   8  0    29       BIG LAKE OUTCASTS (19)
 BALOR 846                     5   7  0    28       OF WOLF AND MAN (57)
 PHILIP K. DICK 848            6   6  0    27       LITERATE LOONS (40)
 THE CATALYST 939              4   0  0    27       IMMORTAL ASYLUM (86)
 SHOTGUN WEDDING 898           4   4  0    26       AGGRESSION INC (78)
 GREGORR 865                   5   5  0    25       WARMASTERS (15)
 CARIEC TOM 984                3   0  1    25       LA PENTARCHIE (11)
 BRAIN 812                     5   9  0    24       ORCAE ITA (80)
 PUNCH CARD 784                4   5  0    24       AGGRESSION INC (78)
 DEAD SEXY 782                 3   6  0    24       AGGRESSION INC (78)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-ABOMBINATION 917              4   2  1    23       THE MOTHERSHIP (83)
 CORRIN 924                    3   3  1    23       CLAN LONGBEARD (39)
 ATTILA KEENBLADE 912          3   4  0    23       DRAGONBANE GUILD (13)
 LOBBYIST 982                  2   0  0    23       CORRUPTION (90)
-KLAXON 879                    5   3  0    22       THE MOTHERSHIP (83)
 AELA FIREBLADE 975            3   1  0    22       BIG LAKE OUTCASTS (19)
 VOLBEAT 860                   5   6  0    21       KELLUMBO'S KIDS (18)
 IAYCK 891                     4   5  0    21       PHILANTHROPISTS (85)
 HCLCHICKEN 969                3   1  0    21       GOONSWARM (79)
 BUGBEAR 968                   2   2  0    21       MONSTER MANUAL (87)
 CHANDLER 882                  2   2  0    21       FRIENDS (84)
 ZANDIR 869                    5   5  0    20       CLAN LONGBEARD (39)
 WYLD WYTCH 845                4   8  0    20       UNHOLY KNIGHTS (81)
 MISS BUNNY 992                2   0  0    20       KELLUMBO'S KIDS (18)
 JOEY 933                      3   0  0    18       FRIENDS (84)
 KEY CUTTER 894                4   5  0    17       WOODY'S WORKSHOP (69)
-GURGLE 922                    4   1  0    17       THE MOTHERSHIP (83)
 BRIARSMILE 944                2   3  1    17       PHILANTHROPISTS (85)
-HUSKER DU 878                 4   3  1    16       THE MOTHERSHIP (83)
-WOLFMOTHER 881                4   4  0    16       THE MOTHERSHIP (83)
 HAKKON 895                    4   4  0    16       GOONSWARM (79)
 HEARTLESS 888                 3   4  0    16       HOUSE OF HEARTS (56)
 SARAH JAMES 973               1   0  0    16       WHO'S YOUR MAMA (89)
 HERA BLOODSTONE 960           2   2  0    15       THE RED BLADES (88)
-BRONKO 560                    2   3  0    15       WAR MACHINE (26)
 W.S. GILBERT 995              1   1  0    15       LITERATE LOONS (40)
 E.M. FORSTER 914              2   5  0    14       LITERATE LOONS (40)
 MACEO 928                     2   3  0    14       FUCHI OWNED (54)
 BRICK MOUSE 987               2   1  0    14       RODENT CLAN (37)
 DEWALT 985                    1   2  0    14       IMMORTAL ASYLUM (86)
 IRON SMITH 997                1   1  0    14       LA PENTARCHIE (11)
 RACHEL 884                    3   1  0    13       FRIENDS (84)
 EFREETI 957                   3   2  0    12       MONSTER MANUAL (87)
 KARTTOON 1000                 1   1  0    12       GOONSWARM (79)
-HAVANA BLACK 561              3   2  0    11       WAR MACHINE (26)
 DUELMOUSTER 913               2   5  0    11       RODENT CLAN (37)
 JAX LE BLUE 946               2   2  0    11       CULT OF BACCHUS (4)
 MADE MAN 980                  2   0  0    11       CORRUPTION (90)
 '69 FAIRLANE COBRA 1007       1   0  0    11       AMERICAN MUSCLE (43)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LORD EXETER 932               2   4  0    10       DRAGONBANE GUILD (13)
 DYLAN RYDER 974               1   0  0    10       WHO'S YOUR MAMA (89)
 LATRICE 945                   2   3  0     9       KELLUMBO'S KIDS (18)
 WINDY CITY 978                1   1  0     9       CORRUPTION (90)
 JACK WAYFARE 998              1   1  0     8       THE RED BLADES (88)
 SCRATCH MY BACK 981           2   0  0     7       CORRUPTION (90)
 DUKE JUPITER 959              1   3  1     7       THE RED BLADES (88)
 BISTON 948                    1   4  0     7       OF WOLF AND MAN (57)
 MONKEY KING 942               1   3  0     6       IMMORTAL ASYLUM (86)
 BINAURAL 941                  1   3  0     6       IMMORTAL ASYLUM (86)
 ROSS 883                      1   3  0     6       FRIENDS (84)
 LIGDISH BANG 983              1   2  0     5       PHILANTHROPISTS (85)
 MOONFLOWER LUX 962            1   2  0     5       THE RED BLADES (88)
 DEVON 994                     1   1  0     4       KELLUMBO'S KIDS (18)
 ARIOCH 996                    1   1  0     4       OF WOLF AND MAN (57)
 PATCHWERK 1004                1   0  0     4       OF WOLF AND MAN (57)
 PHOEBE 989                    1   0  0     3       FRIENDS (84)
 THE SEAMSTRESS 986            0   3  0     3       BIG LAKE OUTCASTS (19)
 SHAY REDMOON 963              0   3  0     3       CULT OF BACCHUS (4)
 BLAIDD DRWG 991               0   2  0     2       DRAGONBANE GUILD (13)
 PORK 979                      0   2  0     2       CORRUPTION (90)
 CHIMERA 1006                  0   1  0     1       MONSTER MANUAL (87)
 VELICITY VON 970              0   1  0     1       WHO'S YOUR MAMA (89)
 ETTIN 1005                    0   1  0     1       MONSTER MANUAL (87)
 TAP AND DIE 1009              0   1  0     1       WOODY'S WORKSHOP (69)
 DAPHNE ROSEN 972              0   1  0     1       WHO'S YOUR MAMA (89)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                W  L K TEAM NAME            SLAIN BY              TURN Revenge?
NURM 511               13  9 0 4-LETTER CAVEMEN 65  CHUPACABRON 284        58   
HORSE 610              14 14 2 BATTLE GRUNTS 20     FURIOUS FOX 143        55   
BOB 1008                0  1 0 FUCHI OWNED 54       WURM KIN               58  NONE
DEADTEAR 793            9  5 1 GOONSWARM 79         PINKY 809              57   
SHRIKE 1010             0  1 0 GOONSWARM 79         MOUNTAIN TROLL         58  NONE
AZURE SLING 940         2  2 0 IMMORTAL ASYLUM 86   BRIARSMILE 944         58   
BAIL ME OUT 1003        0  1 0 KELLUMBO'S KIDS 18   SPYMASTER              58  NONE
CROQUE_MORT 934         1  2 0 LA PENTARCHIE 11     BILI 622               55  REVENGED
P.G. WODEHOUSE 709      8 13 1 LITERATE LOONS 40    SPIREWOLF 768          56  REVENGED
MIND FLAYER 955         2  3 0 MONSTER MANUAL 87    KILLER SMILE 783       58   
DEAD 1002               0  1 0 ORCAE ITA 80         BLACK ORC              58  NONE
DEAD TOO 1001           0  1 0 ORCAE ITA 80         ARENAMASTER            58  NONE
FAITH 923               1  3 0 ORCAE ITA 80         DUKE JUPITER 959       56   
JUNGLEBEARD 910         2  2 0 PHILANTHROPISTS 85   ABOMBINATION 917       55  REVENGED
DEATH'S MISTRESS 813    3 11 0 UNHOLY KNIGHTS 81    MOUNTAIN TROLL         58  NONE
EVA ANGELINA 971        0  1 0 WHO'S YOUR MAMA 89   CARIEC TOM 984         58   
WEDGE 938               0  4 0 WOODY'S WORKSHOP 69  CORRIN 924             56  JUST REVENGED

                                     PERSONAL ADS

I guess I should win this kind of fight, but well, I'm a slug, and Wee Beastie is
really something... good luck to her against the IC! -- Year of the Cat (again)

Thanks, Balor... if you want to try again with another tactic, I won't avoid! -- St
John Kitten, the other disappointing slug.

Welcome to the successful Corruption team. -- Le Pentarque.

Guys, you owe me a 5-0 as a gift for my newborn son.  Don't be greedy! -- Le
Pentarque.

     Congratulations on that.

Verminderella -- Man, you can take a few shots.  As you can see I am not going to let
you sit around and pound on me, but nice try. -- Grath

Ting-Ting -- Nicely done.  I know your weakness now.  See you soon. -- Biston

Overkill -- It must really hurt, deep down inside doesn't it?  I mean to be RIGHT
There... allllmost... the win, JUST within your grasp....  Then it's just taken away
from you.  The rug pulled right out.  I tell you what.  I am challenging.  Let's see
if you can pull it out this time. -- Balor

Windy City -- Shesh, didn't even let me swing. -- Arioch

The Director -- Oh I do my own talking, see you on the sands. -- Tripwire

Efreeti -- You are the last straw to be thrown on the grave of Death's Mistress, it
is time for her to rejoin her master. -- Gentleben

SM5 -- You look good with them new glasses, I almost didn't recognize ya.  I shall be
more prepared next time just don't wear any Elton John glasses those give me the
creeps. -- Decapitated Bill

Angered Ape -- Now I am angry, how many times do I have to hit ya before you go
down? -- Wyld Wytch

Year of the Cat -- This is definitly not your month. -- Wee Beastie

Rat in the Hat -- Let's try that again I was lookin' at that big hat and forgot what
I was doin'. -- Pinky's Pig Boy

Cooruption and Vito Corleone -- Welcome to the sands of Shadowspire, we need more
corruption here the government has been a little lazy. -- Unholy Knights

IC -- 7-5 in favor of Gentleben, let's try and hook up this turn. -- Gentleben

Loons -- An honorable vengeance.  P.G.Wodehouse can rest in peace. -- Spirewolf

Volbeat -- A final attempt at the bloodfeud.  Nice try, but not good enough. -- St.
George

Dead Sexy -- Nice challenge.  Win it while you can. -- Lord Exeter

Aela Fireblade -- That was long and dull.  Maybe next time. -- Blaidd Drwg

Nuln -- I welcome you back and then you challenge and beat Gigi!  That's it no more
Mr. nice guy! -- DeGotti

Corruption -- Sounds like a political stable!  Welcome to the cause that is
Shadowspire! -- DeGotti

Ichibod -- It was down to Meda vs Hakkon to see which one of us was going to do the
dreaded 0 fer!  Thanks for taking one for the team! -- DeGotti

Tin-Ting -- You found out the hard way that I am not as bad as my record shows. --
Gerth

Bahbi -- What a difference a few turns make.  Well fought. -- Zandir

Ornery Ocelot -- Looks like both of us have a knack of fighting much better when
desperate. -- Dunnik

Pink's Pig Boy -- Well at least the loss dropped me back down the ranks. -- Urrim

Wedge -- That fight picked right up where we left off a few turns ago. -- Corrin

Vile Rat -- Oppps did I do that?  <grin>  The DC has been duly noted for future
references. -- Gerth

Sye the Bearded -- Damn golems! -- Zandir

Durg -- For a second there I thought I had you. -- Dunnik

68 Road Runner -- Tough matchup, you are a damn good teacher though. -- Urrim

Key Cutter -- Boy that was close. -- Corrin

Congrats Djohey and Maria! -- The Red Blades

Corruption -- Welcome! -- Bill the Bard

Djeree -- Nice use of the weapon.  I really expected more skills out of you. -- H.
Bloodstone

Devon -- You're quite a dancer. -- Jack

Iayck -- Dude, what the...?  Lame dude, totally lame.  I think I'd rather watch the
pigs root around the Philanthropists stable than fight you again.  Your fighting, if
that's what you'd call it, was about as exciting as watching a dung beetle trying to
roll its little ball of treasure uphill against the wind on a rainy day.  That was so
totally a waste of my time. -- Shotgun Wedding

Lord Exeter -- Lord of the Dance, maybe.  Why don't you Riverdance your way over to
the bar and fetch me a jar of hippocras.  Exet-er stage left! -- Dead Sexy

Klaxon -- Taht was a tough loss, I must admit.  I had money riding on that one.  My
only consolation is that you will DEFINATELY have to purchaes new armor after all
that pounding you took! -- Punch Card

Klaxon -- It has come to our attention that you aren't actually a warrior!  I have it
on good authority that you are simply a suit of armor which has been bewitched so as
to be able to stand in the arena and take a beating!  I declare all of Aggression
Inc's losses to you up to now, and any in the future, to be null and void!  Good god,
man!  I'm talking to an empty suit of armor! -- The Director

Balor -- Yet another noble win.  I believe that I performed nearly up to my potentiol
this time.  Perhaps a few more losses agianst you will help me to either learn to
beat your style, or allow me to give up honorably. -- Overkill

HCLChicken -- Hey, love!  T'was an interestin fight to say the least, but was all the
better what with me winnin and all!  I left me jug to ye. -- Killer Smile

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

DEATH'S MISTRESS was viciously butchered by MOUNTAIN TROLL in a 2 minute fight.
BOB was slaughtered by WURM KIN in a 1 minute Dark Arena battle.
DEAD TOO was easily killed by ARENAMASTER in a 1 minute Dark Arena match.
BAIL ME OUT was assassinated by SPYMASTER in a 1 minute Dark Arena duel.
DEAD was dealt death by BLACK ORC in a 1 minute gory Dark Arena contest.
SHRIKE was assassinated by MOUNTAIN TROLL in a 1 minute Dark Arena match.
PLASMA CUTTER devastated CORRIN in a 1 minute uneven Bloodfeud brawl.
NURM was assassinated by CHUPACABRON in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge struggle.
'69 STINGRAY bested GRACCHUS in a 2 minute Challenge competition.
GARK was savagely defeated by FURIOUS FOX in a 2 minute expert's Challenge melee.
PINKY was vanquished by GURG in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge Title duel.
CLARA lost to THAG in a popular 2 minute gory Challenge duel.
WILHELM overpowered FALSE TEETH in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge melee.
ANGEL HEART overpowered QUARTON in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge match.
WEE BEASTIE was devastated by KANODRAUG in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge conflict.
'08 CHALLENGER demolished SLEDGE in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match.
WIMPY was overpowered by GIGI DIVINE in a 2 minute mismatched Challenge conflict.
BOWTIE BOB defeated DUNNIK in a popular 1 minute Challenge duel.
'71 MACH ONE was devastated by GARSK in a 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
VILE RAT overpowered H.P. LOVECRAFT in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge brawl.
PINKY'S PIG BOY devastated RYAK RAZORSAW in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge fight.
DECAPITATED BILL demolished BAHBI in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge bout.
MEDA beat BALOR in a 2 minute Challenge fight.
DEAD SEXY was overcome by BILI in a 2 minute bloody Challenge competition.
OWL-EYES beat BUGBEAR in a 5 minute expert vs. novice Challenge fight.
ST. GEORGE beat CHANDLER in a 1 minute Challenge fray.
OVERKILL viciously subdued IAYCK in a crowd pleasing 2 minute gory Challenge fray.
SHOTGUN WEDDING subdued BRICK MOUSE in a 5 minute Challenge fight.
HEARTLESS savagely defeated HAKKON in a tiresome 11 minute gory Challenge duel.
WYLD WYTCH was vanquished by MELISSA JOAN in a 2 minute one-sided Challenge fight.
PUNCH CARD demolished BISTON in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge melee.
KILLER SMILE slaughtered MIND FLAYER in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge fray.
IRON SMITH handily defeated DUKE JUPITER in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge bout.
DEWALT vanquished MOONFLOWER LUX in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge bout.
MACEO was savagely defeated by GREGORR in a 2 minute gruesome Challenge duel.
MISS BUNNY overpowered SHAY REDMOON in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge match.
LIGDISH BANG was savagely defeated by KEY CUTTER in a 3 minute brutal Challenge fight.
BLAIDD DRWG was savagely defeated by WINDY CITY in a 3 minute Challenge bout.
ARIOCH was viciously subdued by E.M. FORSTER in a 2 minute bloody Challenge fight.
JOEY luckily beat DUELMOUSTER in a 2 minute Challenge match.
JAX LE BLUE viciously subdued ROSS in a popular 2 minute beginner's Challenge bout.
RACHEL luckily beat DEVON in a 3 minute gruesome novice's Challenge conflict.
BONE SHAMAN overpowered EFREETI in a 1 minute uneven Challenge bout.
AELA FIREBLADE overpowered LORD EXETER in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge competition.
THE CATALYST unbelievably bested HERA BLOODSTONE in a 2 minute Challenge duel.
THE SEAMSTRESS was subdued by JACK WAYFARE in a 2 minute beginner's Challenge duel.
BINAURAL was bested by MADE MAN in a action packed 4 minute amateur's Challenge match.
BRUTUS handily defeated DJOHEY DJR. in a 1 minute mismatched fight.
GRATH narrowly defeated BLACK MARIA in a crowd pleasing 5 minute expert's competition.
VERMINDERELLA was overpowered by PO'D PANDA in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
GERTH was overpowered by KRAZED KOALA in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
SLAUGHTER MOUSE 5 overpowered ONYB ENGLVAR in a 1 minute one-sided fray.
RAT IN THE HAT was unbelievably bested by LIAM O'FLAHERTY in a exciting 1 minute duel.
BALTAIRE savagely defeated '68 ROAD RUNNER in a exciting 9 minute brutal conflict.
LIBERIUS was demolished by TING-TING in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
DURG was handily defeated by ST JOHN KITTEN in a 2 minute brutal mismatched contest.
SYE THE BEARDED was bested by TIN SNIPS in a 1 minute battle.
DJEREE THE DJERK was demolished by URRIM in a crowd pleasing 1 minute one-sided brawl.
ORNERY OCELOT demolished ATTILA KEENBLADE in a 1 minute mismatched battle.
SPIREWOLF was unbelievably bested by ANGERED APE in a popular 4 minute gruesome bout.
YEAR OF THE CAT devastated DANGEROUS CRIMINAL in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
ZANDIR was devastated by AVERAGE JOE in a 1 minute mismatched conflict.
VOLBEAT was savagely defeated by HCLCHICKEN in a 5 minute match.
PHILIP K. DICK unbelievably bested BRAIN in a crowd pleasing 2 minute gory battle.
PORK was unbelievably bested by PHOEBE in a unpopular 18 minute brutal novice's fight.
SCRATCH MY BACK slimly won victory over DAPHNE ROSEN in a 15 minute novice's duel.
LOBBYIST overpowered CONVICTED THIEF in a 1 minute uneven melee.
CARIEC TOM executed EVA ANGELINA in a 1 minute one-sided battle.
KARTTOON vanquished TAP AND DIE in a 2 minute one-sided fight.
LATRICE was bested by W.S. GILBERT in a 1 minute beginner's match.
BRIARSMILE delivered the death blow upon AZURE SLING in a 1 minute novice's bout.
MONKEY KING was overpowered by SARAH JAMES in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
DYLAN RYDER overpowered ETTIN in a 1 minute uneven brawl.
PATCHWERK unbelievably bested CHIMERA in a exciting 9 minute amateur's match.
'69 FAIRLANE COBRA demolished VELICITY VON in a exciting 1 minute mismatched duel.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|STRIKING ATTACK                 32         LUNGING ATTACK   124 -  93 -  9      57  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                  22         TOTAL PARRY      106 -  96 -  0      52  |
|TOTAL PARRY                     19         WALL OF STEEL     55 -  55 -  2      50  |
|BASHING ATTACK                  19         STRIKING ATTACK  124 - 137 -  8      48  |
|AIMED BLOW                      14         AIMED BLOW        69 -  83 -  2      45  |
|WALL OF STEEL                   12         PARRY-RIPOSTE     33 -  42 -  1      44  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  9         BASHING ATTACK    60 -  80 -  5      43  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    8         PARRY-LUNGE       22 -  30 -  2      42  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      5         SLASHING ATTACK   37 -  53 -  1      41  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     2         PARRY-STRIKE      11 -  16 -  0      41  |

Turn  58 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

AIMED BLOW         8 -  6     TOTAL PARRY        9 - 10         3  LUNGING ATTACK 
STRIKING ATTACK   18 - 14     BASHING ATTACK     8 - 11         3  STRIKING ATTACK
SLASHING ATTACK    5 -  4     PARRY-LUNGE        1 -  4         1  WALL OF STEEL  
LUNGING ATTACK    12 - 10     PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -  7         1  TOTAL PARRY    
PARRY-STRIKE       1 -  1                                       1  AIMED BLOW     
WALL OF STEEL      6 -  6                                       1  SLASHING ATTACK
                                                                1  PARRY-LUNGE    

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
LUNGING ATTACK   GURG 515                   14   8  0  142 4-LETTER CAVEMEN (65)
TOTAL PARRY      GRATH 581                  23  12  0  122 OF WOLF AND MAN (57)
STRIKING ATTACK  BRUTUS 616                 17  14  0  120 WARMASTERS (15)
AIMED BLOW       PLASMA CUTTER 626          15  11  0  115 WOODY'S WORKSHOP (69)
SLASHING ATTACK  PO'D PANDA 147             13  11  2  100 FURRY FURY (25)
PARRY-LUNGE      PINKY 809                   8   6  3   92 ORCAE ITA (80)
WALL OF STEEL    GRACCHUS 825                9   5  1   87 WARMASTERS (15)
BASHING ATTACK   LIAM O'FLAHERTY 698        14  10  1   66 LITERATE LOONS (40)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    WEE BEASTIE 864             8   2  1   51 UNHOLY KNIGHTS (81)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is BRUTUS 616.  The most popular warrior this turn was 
BALTAIRE 833.  The ten other most popular fighters were CHIMERA 1006, SPIREWOLF 768, 
THAG 513, WINDY CITY 978, GRATH 581, OVERKILL 781, BINAURAL 941, BRAIN 812, '69 
STINGRAY 736, and BILI 622.

The least popular fighter this week was PORK 979.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were PHOEBE 989, HAKKON 895, SCRATCH MY BACK 981, HEARTLESS 888, DAPHNE 
ROSEN 972, BRICK MOUSE 987, VOLBEAT 860, OWL-EYES 851, PATCHWERK 1004, and MONKEY 
KING 942.

The following warriors will travel to AD after next turn:

CHUPACABRON (81-284) HUCKLE'S CATS (51)
BRUTUS (81-616) WARMASTERS (15)

The following warriors have traveled to AD after fighting this turn:

DJOHEY DJR. (81-288) THE MONGOLOIDS II (30)
BLACK MARIA (81-435) HOUSE OF HEARTS (56)