Date   : 09/07/2011    Duedate: 09/20/2011


DM-81    TURN-122

This Weeks Top Honors


(81-1433) [18-6-0,126]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

OTTO'S DINER (96)              GFE (126)
(81-1433) [18-6-0,126]         (81-1618) [6-2-1,84]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

PIT FIEND                      HARP
(81-1344) [17-16-1,105]        (81-744) [9-8-0,40]



Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. ALE HOUSE MERCS (5)         51
2. DRAGONBANE GUILD (13)       46      CAPITAL CARTEL (93)
3. MONSTER MANUAL (87)         40      Unchartered Team
4. OTTO'S DINER (96)           30
5. OF WOLF AND MAN (57)        28      GFE (126)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 1 CAPITAL CARTEL (93)      162 112  6 59.1   1/ 1 LA PENTARCHIE (11)       10  5 1
 2/ 2 LA PENTARCHIE (11)       354 250 14 58.6   2/ 4 ALE HOUSE MERCS (5)      10  5 0
 3/ 3 AMERICAN MUSCLE (43)     232 173 14 57.3   3/ 6 DRAGONBANE GUILD (13)    10  5 0
 4/ 5 SUMMERBORN (104)         129 105 13 55.1   4/ 2 CLAN LONGBEARD (39)       8  5 0
 5/ 8 DRAGONBANE GUILD (13)    328 278 11 54.1   5/12 THE RED BLADES (88)       8  6 1
 6/ 7 JUNGLELAND (103)         133 114  3 53.8   6/16 ARCHAIC CHAOS (111)       8  7 1
 7/ 6 DARQUE AGES (29)         268 230 13 53.8   7/ 7*GFE (126)                 8  7 1
 8/12*GFE (126)                 20  18  2 52.6   8/ 9 OTTO'S DINER (96)         8  7 0
 9- 9 FUCHI OWNED (54)         215 194  9 52.6   9/13*MY TOP RATED (129)        8  7 0
10/10 OF WOLF AND MAN (57)     302 280 13 51.9  10/10 SUMMERBORN (104)          7  8 2
11/11 OTTO'S DINER (96)        153 142  5 51.9  11/19*RAIN DOGS (132)           7  8 0
12/15 ALE HOUSE MERCS (5)      145 135  5 51.8  12/ 8 OF WOLF AND MAN (57)      7  8 0
13/13 CLAN LONGBEARD (39)      312 295 14 51.4  13/15 JUNGLELAND (103)          7  8 0
14-14 WARMASTERS (15)          307 291 24 51.3  14/22*FOOD (130)                7  8 0
15/ 4*THE MOTHERSHIP 011 (128)  22  22  2 50.0  15-14 WARMASTERS (15)           6  4 0
16-17 MIDDLE WAY 12 (122)       55  58  0 48.7  16/18 CAPITAL CARTEL (93)       6  4 0
17/18 LITERATE LOONS (40)      289 319 12 47.5  17- 5 MIDDLE WAY 12 (122)       6  4 0
18/16*RAIN DOGS (132)            7   8  0 46.7  18/ 3*THE MOTHERSHIP 011 (128)  6  8 1

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
19/24*FOOD (130)                 7   8  0 46.7  19/21 LITERATE LOONS (40)       6  9 1
20/20 THE RED BLADES (88)      148 170  9 46.5  20/23*DEUS EX MACHINA (131)     5 10 0
21/21 FURRY FURY (25)          174 206  7 45.8  21/17 AMERICAN MUSCLE (43)      5 10 0
22/19*MY TOP RATED (129)        16  19  0 45.7  22/24 MONSTER MANUAL (87)       5 10 0
23/22 MONSTER MANUAL (87)      142 186  5 43.3  23/20 FURRY FURY (25)           4  9 0
24/25 ARCHAIC CHAOS (111)       61  99  6 38.1  24/11 DARQUE AGES (29)          4 11 0
25/26*DEUS EX MACHINA (131)      5  10  0 33.3  25-25 FUCHI OWNED (54)          0 10 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

                                Building New Muscle

This story is set a few weeks ago in Aradi.
     Elephant makes his way into the famous Scrodbucks shop.  For those of you not
familiar with Scrodbucks, it's a coffee shop founded by Sir Indimar Fallon and co-
owned with Elephant.  The two made a killing in the TOGS days selling coffee and
various TOGS memorabilia.  As Elephant makes his way into the shop a surge of
nostalgia overcomes him.  He sees a large picture of Manager hanging on the wall.
Under a plaque reads, Manager, Winner of the 1st TOGS.  One of Nuln's Nutsacks sits
in a shadowbox.  In a corner in a glass case are a pair of Hombre's games used leg
warmers.  As Elephant makes his way to the counter he sees a familiar face.
     "I'll take a double Latte Scrodaccino."
     "Will this complete your order, Sir?"
     "No, I'll take one of those Banana Nut Muffins as well."
     "Okay, that will be 6 even."
     "Bubbles, it's me!  Don't you recognize me?"
     Bubbles jumps over the counter and gives Elephant a giant hug.
     "So when did you start working here?"
     "Indimar hired me a few months ago.  What brings you to Aradi?"
     "Well I missed the place.  I've missed you, too.  I'm gonna take some time off
managing and get this shop back to where it was.  Where is that bum Indimar at,
     "He's back in his office."
     "You mean our office.  Let me guess, he's playing WoW?"
     "You didn't hear it from me."
     "How does he run this place and Indimar's Armory?"
     "I run this place and Oestreich is one of the best armorers around."
     "Okay, I'm going to have a little talk with Indimar later.  I'll be over in the
old TOGS manager section waiting for Pauly."
     "Wait, Pauly is coming here?"
     "Yes, to interview Cyberpunk."
     "Pauly and Cyberpunk?  I have to go."
     As Elephant makes his way his seat, Bubbles leaves the front of the shop for the
office.  A few minutes later we see Indimar at the front of the counter.
     "I knew I was going to regret you coming back, Elephant.  You're not here even
five minutes and you ran Bubbles off.  Now I have to run the front of the store until
the next shift change."
     "WoW will be okay for a few minutes without you.  So Oestreich is the man behind
the metal?  Your weapons are second to none.  You should have O join me for a
     "Oestreich isn't allowed in here."
     "Ask Hombre sometime about Oestreich and coffee mugs."
     Suddenly Pauly burst through the door and makes his way towards Elephant.  "Hi,
Dad, sorry in a hurry.  Can I get a house coffee back over here when you get a
chance?  Thanks."
     Pauly sits down at the table.  Elephant hands him some boxes and gets out from
the table.
     "You aren't staying for the interview?  Did you see what they've been saying
about you on the boards?"
     "Pauly, I trust your judgment and I don't read boards anymore.  Everything you
need is there."
     Elephant leaves the Scrodbucks as Indimar brings Pauly's coffee over.  A few
seconds later in walks a man wearing a black cloak and makes his way to Pauly's
     "Cyber, have a seat."
     "I'm not sitting down.  I'm not going to fight you over her though.  At least
not with Laverne out front."
     "Fight you over who?"
     "You called me here to fight you over Bubbles.  Send that overgrown rat down the
street and we can do this."
     "Wait, you thought I called you here over Bubbles?  Dude, I'm engaged and didn't
even know about you two."
     "Then why am I here?"
     "To interview for the American Muscle manager position in Shadowspire."
     "Shadowspire?  Never been there?  What are the women like?}
     "So is that a yes?"
     "Sure why not."
     "Okay, here's everything you'll need.  Indimar has a shipment of weapons going
to our compound.  You can ride with him.  I'm going to ride Laverne, it's faster that
     "Okay, but you keep that damn overgrown rodent away from me or I'll finish it
off this time."
     "You haven't changed a bit.  You're gonna work out fine.  My dad knows the way.
You guys need to make two stops along the way.  Good luck."
     Pauly exits the Scrodbucks and flies away on Laverne.  Indimar and Cyberpunk
leave the Scrodbucks and head for Shadowspire in a wagon loaded with weapons.
     "We need to stop and get Clyde."
     "Punk, no time for Clyde right now."
     A few days later the two arrive in Shadowspire.  They drive up to a local diner
which has construction going on.  There are two signs, one that says open during
construction and another is an Elephant with a big red X over it.
     "Okay, Indi, I'll go inside and you go deliver the weapons to Dark.  I guess
he's been having trouble with weapons breaking lately.  Hurry back, though."
     "You do realize it's Darque, not Dark.  Get me a Diablo Sandwich and a Dr.
Pepper to go."
     "Don't see the difference.  Catch ya in a bit."
     Indimar rides away as Cyberpunk enters the diner.  Cyberpunk is greeted by a
waitress as he enters.
     "Welcome to Otto's, sit anywhere you'd like, Hon."
     "Not very busy?"
     "No, this construction has made it tough.  Do you know what you want?"
     "Bread and lots of it."
     "Breaded pudding?"
     "No, as much bread as you can spare.  Oh, and one Diablo Sandwich and a Dr.
Pepper to go, please."
     "Okay, let me get Otto for you, Honey."
     Otto comes out of the back and makes his way over to the table.
     "You want bread?"
     "Yes and lots of it."
     "Well, I'm not a wholesaler."
     "It doesn't have to be fresh and it looks like you can use the business."
     "We have been slow lately."
     "I'll take all you have and I'm paying cash."
     "Punk you in here?"
     Indimar walks into the diner.  The three men go to the back of the diner and
load up all the bread.  Indimar gets back on the wagon and starts eating his
sandwich.  Cyberpunk pays Otto for all the bread and the sandwich.
     "Nice doing business with you.  You said your name was Cyberpunk?"
     "Right turn, Clyde."
     "Come again?"
     Out of nowhere Cyberpunk throws a right jab which knocks Otto to the ground.
Otto is lying on the ground holding his mouth as blood flows out his upper lip.  He
starts crying.
     "What did you go and do that for?"
     "Now you have something to cry about, sissy.  Thank your lucky stars that Clyde
is still back in Aradi.  You're a worthless excuse for a team manager.  You should
run a daycare or something."
     More tears flow from Otto's eyes.
     "What are you talking about?"
     Suddenly the waitress comes running out the backdoor and hands Otto a rag to put
on his face.
     "Hey babycakes you ever want to get in trouble, look me up.  The name is
Cyberpunk and I'm the new manager of American Muscle.  Otto, tell the old man he's
next.  You're gonna come to miss Elephant."
     Cyberpunk and Indimar ride off into the sunset.  In the background ever so
softly you can hear Mickey Gilley's "Don't the Girls All Get Prettier at Closing
Time" playing in the background.
     "Just like ole times, Indi."
     "Damn straight."
     "Clyde and Ma are on their way.  Should be here in two days."
     "Damn it, what are you thinking?"
     "Stay tuned, Indi, stay tuned.  This place is about to change.  Let's go get a
mushroom pizza.  Oh and see if you can track down Tank Murdock."

Tune in next week for "Sleeping on the Job?"

       * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

Greasin' the Wheels of Fate 

     The sun leaned down and touched the rooftops and gothic steeples across
Shadowspire's skyline before starting to tumble behind the broad, leafy curtain of
the western forests.  Throughout the city, pale shadows steadily darkened and
expanded to cover the shimmering stones in the street.  The foot traffic began to
pick up as the temperature slowly dropped from 'inhuman' to 'tolerable'.  Searing
arid breezes began to falter and die; the bracing damp air from the harbor began to
seep into the city.  The lamplighters commenced their tasks amid a growing stream of
residents that began to pour through the cooling streets of Shadowspire.
     Two figures pushed from the recess of a private door.  The first was swathed
head-to-food in a hooded powder-blue gown of translucent gossamer.  He seemed to
float steadily across the uneven cobblestones; his gown revealed nothing more than a
slim silhouette.  His companion stayed a step behind; he was a heavily built man with
short-cropped hair that stood like a bristle brush atop his broad head.  Despite his
bulk and black byrnie, his stride was surprisingly light and graceful.
     After wending their way through the city for several blocks, the two companions
stopped suddenly and looked at each other.
     "Yech!  What IS that smell?"
     "The Western Stables.  We're close."
     "Close to what?? I'm close to losin' my lunch! Let's get outta here!"  The
stocky form began to turn away.
     "Havoc!"  The Kid's slender hand fastened firmly upon the thick mailed arm of
his companion, stopping his movement.  "Don't be such a weakling! This malodorous
atmosphere is merely temporary."
     "Says you," muttered Havoc.  "Where is this place you're draggin' me to, anyway?
A goblin charnel house?!"  He retched and spit on the cobblestones.  A slight hiss
from the hot stones underlined his comment.
     "Goblin charnel house?  Ridiculous!  What makes you say that?"
     "They like their meat slightly rotten."  Havoc coughed and spit again.
"Tenderized and tasty..."  He retched and spit again.
     "Well, now that we've found the stables, I know we're very close.  Just this
small task and then dinner at The Acropolis."
     "That's comfortin'.  I wonder if I'll be able to keep it down," hissed Havoc.
     "Breathe through your mouth instead of your nose; it'll help."
     Havoc retched and gagged and spit into the street again as the Kid spun slowly
and scanned the immediate area.
     "Let's get this over with!" growled Havoc hoarsely.
     A narrow alley veered off from the stables for thirty-five meters and stopped
against a tall curb in front of a newly painted building.  The cooling breezes buzzed
with the hum from dozens of insects spiraling and pushing against the doors, which
appeared to not only have been freshly painted, but were, in fact, brand new.
     "Over here," whispered Arcane.  He made a beeline for the door; Havoc was close
behind him.  He almost bumped into the Kid when he came to another sudden stop.  The
swarm of insects was thick and vigorous right in front of the door.
     "Who's actin' like a girl now?" Havoc grinned.  The Kid gestured.  Havoc craned
his neck and looked up.  Three large signs were set above the doorframe.  The first
read: "Otto's Diner-- Home of Shadowspire's Finest Warriors."   The second, smaller
sign was below this; it displayed a somewhat childish outline of an elephant.  The
third sign, also below the first, appeared to be a more life-like approximation of a
gerbil.  A bright red "x" had been painted across each picture.  Havoc let a low
chuckle escape.
     "I guess the stories are true, huh?"
     "So it would seem.  Shall we?"
     The Kid waved his arms in front of his face and shoved his way through the
flying bugs; Havoc followed close on his heels.  A horde of insects attempted to fly
in on their heels, but once they crossed the threshold they immediately disintegrated
in a flash of sparkling light. 
     Once inside, the hood was pushed back.  The pale, slender face of the Arcane Kid
was revealed; his glowing eyes scanned the large, dimly lit room.  Havoc rubbed his
wide face vigorously.
     "Man!  I HATE bugs!"
     "Let it go," replied the Kid.  "This building appears to be magically enhanced.
You observed the fate of the insects, of course?"
     "Yeah.  So what?"
     The Kid spared Havoc a brief frown before he turned and made his way to a small
booth in the far left corner of the room.  Havoc slid in across from him, his back to
the wall, as a skinny waitress approached.
     She had a tired yet purposeful stride.  Her hair was a thick blonde deeply
streaked with silver.  She kept it out of her face by wrapping it with an old wire
twist tie.  Her outfit might once have been good leather armor.  There were traces of
enamel that was mostly worn or scratched away.  She had cut away the sleeves and most
of the rest of the armor in order to expose her abdomen and some cleavage.  The name
"Bobbi" was stenciled over her right breast.  Various tattoos, some blurred from
scarring, undulated across her bony frame as she approached the Kid.
     "What'll it be, Kid?" asked the waitress with a worn smile that didn't quite
make it past a sneer.
     "Oh, the usual, of course," Arcane grimaced in reply.  The waitress turned
towards Havoc and ran her eyes up and down his burly form.
     "New here, honey?" she asked with a gap-toothed smile.
     "I'm just passin' through," said Havoc.  "You got any Justice?"
     "What?  You mean that stuff out of Jhelum?"  Havoc nodded hopefully.  The
waitress chuckled and clapped her rough hands.  "Honey, ain't you heard?  That place
went out of business not too long ago."  She shook her head.  "Just as well.  Not
many could stomach that juice.  No humans, anyway."
     "Just get him a bottle of whatever you've got," said the Kid brusquely.  "As
long as it's cold and has alcohol in it, he's okay."  Havoc sighed and rolled his
eyes, then nodded in agreement.
     "Yeah, sure."  The waitress tipped her head to the side and eyed the Kid
speculatively.  "Think maybe you could lay down a tip this time?"
     "Would it be too much to ask you to hurry?" replied Arcane with a tight-lipped
smile. The waitress shook her head and gave a tired shrug of resignation before
turning away and trudging back behind the double-hinged doors leading to the kitchen. 
     Havoc studied the room.  Booths ran along three walls.  Large round tables were
scattered throughout the middle of the room. The back wall held the door leading to
the kitchen.  A tall, sturdy counter faced the back wall.  The stools were large and
thickly padded.  'Not bad', thought Havoc, if he were willing to sit with his back to
the room and the front door.  Which would never happen.
     A pair of muscular women wearing arm bracers whispered and fed with their hands
over a large tray in a booth farther down the left wall.  'GFE', thought Havoc.
Whatever was on their tray gave off a lot of steam.  A table near the right wall
shook from the effects of five furry creatures busily gorging and growling at each
other.  The table was littered with trays of half-gnawed bones and large flagons.
'Furry Fury', nodded Havoc to himself.  'Interestin' joint'.  The rest of the room
was empty.  Havoc wondered who else frequented this place, and what it would be like
during a busy period.  The pair sat and looked around them for several minutes.
     The waitress eventually returned with a tray.  She set down a glass and a purple
tulip-shaped bottle in front of Havoc.  There was a frosty sheen of condensation
along the bottle's fluted surfaces.  Havoc reached for it as she lay down several
items in front of The Kid. He ignored the glass and simply yanked the stopper off the
bottle and guzzled a quick swallow.
     The waitress placed a silver dish, with a shallow cover hiding its contents, in
front of Arcane.  A cloth roll of silverware was set next to the dish.  A clear
bottle with a waxed stopper and silver seal was next.  A slender, small-bowl, long-
stemmed glass was placed down with exaggerated care.
     "Anything else, sir?" asked the waitress with a stony stare.
     "No, thank you," replied Arcane.  He didn't look up at her; instead he kept his
eyes fixed on the covered dish.  After a moment's brief hesitation, the waitress
stalked off and sat on a stool at the counter.
     "Why're we REALLY here?"  Havoc whispered.
     "To reward the good will of our friends," whispered Arcane in reply.  "Otto's
Diner is a conduit, of sorts.  A crossroads for various types of-- commerce."  His
hand dipped into his gown and returned with a plump sack of satin-like material.  He
deftly slipped the sack under the shallow cover; he covered this movement by reaching
for the clear bottle.  Arcane examined the seal, then broke it and poured the clear,
bubbly fluid into his glass.
     "Stuff's not too bad," commented Havoc.  He smacked his lips, then ran his
tongue around the inside of his mouth and across his lips.  "But you still ain't said
what we're here for."
     "You DID notice the terrible accident that befell Marco Polo?"  Arcane sipped
delicately from his glass.
     "Yeah.  His sword broke.  They do that."  Havoc took another healthy swig from
the purple bottle.
     "Hhhmmm.  Let's just say that Patroclus was slightly more than lucky that day,"
smirked The Kid.  "The kind of luck that requires... appreciation."
     "Huh."  Havoc met Arcane's eyes for a moment and wrinkled his nose.  "Sounds
despicable.  But that's you!"  He took another gulp.
     "I'd be careful with that if I were you," said Arcane.  "It's Bullinger's Brew."
     "So wha'?" muttered Havoc.  After a moment's reflection he decided to pour the
rest of the bottle into the glass.  He examined it carefully.  It was a deep purple
liquid that seemed to glitter wickedly in the dim light.  Havoc looked at The Kid; he
was watching him smugly.
     "It's distilled from the fermented pulp of a thorny plant somewhere out on the
Rironi Plains."
     Havoc's eyes widened as his mouth moved slowly.  A low set of garbled, sloppy
sounds pushed out of his mouth.  Some drool followed.
     "The local tribes use the pulp as an anesthetic for wound care," nodded Arcane
with a distinct grin.  "The fermented pulp is used as a more powerful anesthetic for
their arrows and lances.  Poisonous to smaller creatures, of course, but perfect to
aid the barbarous brutes in bringing down the massive bison that meander the plains."
     Havoc's jaws worked soundlessly.  More drool seeped out of his mouth.  He
slammed a fist on the table and started to rise.  The other patrons froze.  A blade
appeared in the hands of a few, Arcane noted.  He grabbed Havoc's fist and squeezed.
Havoc's eyes darted back and forth.
     "Easy, Havoc.  Calm yourself.  If it were poisonous, don't you think I would
have told you before you drank it?"  The Kid released Havoc's fist, slapping it
playfully.  "The distilled version merely numbs the mouth and digestive tract
temporarily.  Once it's been absorbed by the digestive tract and gets into your
bloodstream, you'll find yourself comfortably numb all over, but your mind will still
stay sharp and focused."
     Havoc breathed deeply and glared at Arcane.
     "Think of it as being drunk, but aware," chuckled The Kid.  "The Rironi prize
this drink as a precursor to desperate battle.  Wounds are easily ignored; pain is
     Havoc wiped the drool from his chin with the back of his hand.  He tried to
drink more, but choked and gasped with the effort, spilling most of the purple liquid
on himself and the table before slamming the empty glass down.
     "They give sips to their women when they expect them to join in the fray,"
continued Arcane.  "Sometimes, the rumor goes, the women dose themselves before their
wedding night.  Truly a potent and beneficial brew-- with a multitude of
applications."  Havoc wiped his face with his palms and said nothing.
     "Well, shall we go then?"  The Kid began to scoot smoothly out of the booth.  He
stood and waited for Havoc to join him.  Havoc seemed to have lost the fluidity of
movement he had earlier, but he stood and trudged behind Arcane as he exited Otto's
Diner.  Once outside they were forced to push through the cloud of buzzing insects
     "I'm curious to see what sort of 'luck' we have next turn," murmured The Kid
over his shoulder.  "Patroclus is challenging the Duelmaster, after all.  Anything
could happen."
     He cast a brief glimpse backward; Havoc merely glared and said nothing as he
tromped behind.  Arcane chuckled and glided on down the cobblestone street.

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

     Sorry, but someone left their car in my spot and I had to have it towed away.  I
am your new Duelmaster, Holy Shiitake.  The Yellow Press will have to confirm but I
think I'm only the second member from the Diner to hold this esteemed seat.  I
honestly hadn't expected to be here so soon, but as many of you know, recent events
have accelerated my rise through the ranks.
     Just so everyone knows, I wasn't avoiding the match with Corvette.  I had asked
Spork to take the first shot at him to see how good he was.  The only intel I had on
him was that he could kill a one-fight slasher-- not terribly useful information.
Unfortunately the GC stepped in and nixed the challenge because Spork was too low in
the rankings.  So, I issued the challenge myself this past turn.  To my surprise,
that didn't go through either, but the little red Corvette had challenged me anyway.
So, game on.
     The pundits had hailed it as the fight of the year, but in reality there wasn't
much to it.  He never even landed a hit on me.  I had expected so much more and left
quite disappointed.  It made me wonder if his challenge was intended to throw the
fight, to make me feel better.  That thought only lasted for the briefest of moments
until I remembered who I was talking about.  It seems clear now that the anemic
performance was due to acute bloodlust.  And fiberglass armor.
     So, that's it then.  Hot Brown's murder is avenged, albeit in a roundabout way.
Elephant (or whoever is replacing him) still has a 121-point balance on his cheap-
shot tab at the Diner.  I'm sure we can find some way for him to work it off in time.
Next turn not sure where my challenge goes.  Maybe Porcupain deserves a shot at the
title.  Spork tells me he still wants a go at the LeVette, so we may have to indulge
him.  Don't forget to make your donations to the Hot Brown Memorial Fund.  We accept
in-kind donations of automobiles, and I'm told they don't have to be in working

                                             Holy Shiitake

                                      SPY REPORT

     Oh, hi.  Its just little 'ol Debby Tonte.  Thought I'd check out SHADOWSPIRE to 
see what's new.  Wanna hear about a real loser?  Listen to this--THE MOTHERSHIP 011 
got 0-5-0 and dropped 15.  Didn't see much of them after the fights!  Really, just 
how far can one team drop in one round?  DARQUE AGES dropped 13, which I think's more 
than all the other teams combined!  What was the name of that team who got 5-0-0 this 
turn for a total 328-278-11 you ask?  (Sure)  DRAGONBANE GUILD's their name, and 
fighting's their game!  MVP award for PABST?  ALE HOUSE MERCS' proud of him after 
beating FIDGET and getting 24 points.  Talk about yer big time losers!  JERSEY DEVIL 
got smashed by KNUT SUNDERHELM, and lost 20 points!  Like FURRY FURY's PORCUPAIN is 
sweating since she got challenged by Duelmaster HOLY SHIITAKE!  This Duelmaster is 
like something else!  HOLY SHIITAKE stopped PORCUPAIN dead in hers tracks!  Who was 
the wiseguy that said SHADOWSPIRE's Duelmaster was paying for drinks at The Welcome 
Wench?  Don't look at me!   
     AAARRGH!!!  I HATE SPYREPORTING!!!  Sorry.  I just had to say it.  JUNGLELAND 
was SHADOWSPIRE's most avoided team.  Is there some award for that?  Hhmph!  What 
kind of warriors are LA PENTARCHIE?  JUNGLELAND, an easy team to beat if I ever saw 
one, can't get them to accept an invitation!  Like, is QUINN popular, or what?  It 
was challenged the most in all of SHADOWSPIRE!  It's got a 5-4-1, is that good?  For 
sure, I was holding my breath when I found out EARTH  ELEMENTAL challenged FLAVOR TO 
GO.  After all, haven't MONSTER MANUAL and THE MOTHERSHIP 011 had a long standing 
duel in SHADOWSPIRE?  It wasn't a spectacular fight, or anything, but FLAVOR TO GO 
wants me to write about it since it was defeated by EARTH ELEMENTAL.  Satisfied?  '71 
MACH ONE must not be a good enough fighter to get in fair fights.  He challenged 
HOOK.  14 is a big difference.  (Well, that's what they tell me.) I thought '71 MACH 
ONE showed great skill and promise when he subdued HOOK.  All right, so I slept 
through it!  Big deal!   
     What does a fighter fight for?  I mean, the crowds don't give a hoot if someone 
gets killed.  Not after four more fights.  TOM WOLFE of LITERATE LOONS wasn't 
planning on killing REXCE, I bet.  Now he has to worry about being Bloodfeuded, and 
getting put on lists...  What a bummer!  WALKER PERCY got wasted by MOLLUSQUOME!  But 
with a 8-13-0, I guess LITERATE LOONS aren't too bummed.  Like was that some 
Bloodfeud, or what?  (JAGER VON DRACHEN vs. QUINN, that is.) Hey you guys, don't you 
think your families would like to hear from you?  Write!  (Or have someone write for 
     Remember, blood on a purple robe may stain.  Soak it in cold water, and hand 
wash.  I know how much you like reading this stuff, but I really should stop.  I had 
a fun time, see you later-- Debby Tonte  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 HOLY SHIITAKE 1433           18   6  0   126       OTTO'S DINER (96)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SHILLELAGH TOR 1294          21  18  1   120       THE RED BLADES (88)
 PATROCLUS 1410               15   8  2   115       ARCHAIC CHAOS (111)
 MADAM MARIE 1356             23   9  0   107       JUNGLELAND (103)
 PIT FIEND 1344               17  16  1   105       MONSTER MANUAL (87)
 ZOG CORNERSTONE 1319         20  17  0    99       LA PENTARCHIE (11)
 PORCUPAIN 1453               12  11  1    99       FURRY FURY (25)
-CICERO 1266                  22  18  0    98       WARMASTERS (15)
 MADDENED MEERKAT 1134        16  38  0    97       FURRY FURY (25)
 ARCHON 1390                  20   9  0    96       OF WOLF AND MAN (57)
 CREIDDY LAD 1484             12   8  2    93       SUMMERBORN (104)
 GUTTER BALL 1361             19   9  0    92       CAPITAL CARTEL (93)
 JAGER VON DRACHEN 1341       17  17  0    91       DRAGONBANE GUILD (13)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 JAKLAK 1430                  15  10  0    89       CLAN LONGBEARD (39)
 DOPPLEGANGER 1382            15  15  0    87       MONSTER MANUAL (87)
-FLACCUS 1455                 11  11  1    86       WARMASTERS (15)
 PABST 823                    10   3  0    84       ALE HOUSE MERCS (5)
 BERNADETTE 1618               6   2  1    84       GFE (126)
 MARCO POLO 1375              17  11  2    83       DARQUE AGES (29)
 MAGIC RAT 1317               20  17  0    82       JUNGLELAND (103)
 BENEDICT 1470                12   9  0    82       OF WOLF AND MAN (57)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 BIG BONES BILLIE 1442        13  10  0    79       JUNGLELAND (103)
 VIRGINIA WOOLF 1263          16  27  1    78       LITERATE LOONS (40)
-VICTOR 1369                  16  14  1    78       WARMASTERS (15)
 ANGEROO 1452                 14   9  0    78       FURRY FURY (25)
 FIDGET 1403                  17  11  2    74       LA PENTARCHIE (11)
 FIVE 1572                     9   4  1    74       LA PENTARCHIE (11)
 '71 MACH ONE 952             17  12  0    71       AMERICAN MUSCLE (43)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 TOM WOLFE 1467               11  11  2    66       LITERATE LOONS (40)
-MAXENTIUS 1591                7   3  0    66       WARMASTERS (15)
 SISI BA-NETERU 1488          10   9  2    65       THE RED BLADES (88)
 CHARLES MARTEL 1346          15  16  2    63       DARQUE AGES (29)
 ALP ARSLAN 1473              10  10  0    63       DARQUE AGES (29)
 MOLLUSQUOME 1629              8   1  1    62       LA PENTARCHIE (11)
 PUNT 1366                    12  15  0    60       CAPITAL CARTEL (93)
 WONDERFACE 1522              10   7  0    59       LA PENTARCHIE (11)
-MALLE PENNELIS 1553          10  13  0    59       MIDDLE WAY 12 (122)
 QUINN 1634                    5   4  1    58       THE MOTHERSHIP 011 (128)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 KNUT SUNDERHELM 1569          7   6  2    55       DRAGONBANE GUILD (13)
 ZIGGY PIKE 1487               7  13  0    55       DRAGONBANE GUILD (13)
 PANDERA PAX 1406             11  13  0    53       ARCHAIC CHAOS (111)
 SUBPRIME RIB 1567             8   5  1    53       OTTO'S DINER (96)
-POLI SARCHIS 1550            11  10  0    52       MIDDLE WAY 12 (122)
 BECK 743                      8   9  0    52       ALE HOUSE MERCS (5)
 SPORK 1562                    9   5  0    51       OTTO'S DINER (96)
 BANK SHOT 1471               10   7  0    50       CAPITAL CARTEL (93)
-KIRLUA NORIS 1549            13  10  0    49       MIDDLE WAY 12 (122)
 EARTH ELEMENTAL 1592          6   5  0    48       MONSTER MANUAL (87)
 HOOK 1576                     5   4  0    45       CAPITAL CARTEL (93)
-LUGG OPAR 1548               10  13  0    43       MIDDLE WAY 12 (122)
 JUNEBUG 1543                  8   6  2    43       SUMMERBORN (104)
 HARP 744                      9   8  0    40       ALE HOUSE MERCS (5)
 FLAVOR TO GO 1633             4   5  0    40       THE MOTHERSHIP 011 (128)
 SQUASHAPILLAR 1478            8  13  1    38       FURRY FURY (25)
 NIKUS 1583                    6   6  1    38       OF WOLF AND MAN (57)
 JULIETTE 1630                 6   3  0    37       SUMMERBORN (104)
 CAZADOR 1578                  6   6  0    34       DRAGONBANE GUILD (13)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 JERSEY DEVIL 1638             5   3  1    33       JUNGLELAND (103)
 GWENNOLAY 1631                4   5  0    33       OF WOLF AND MAN (57)
 KIRIN ICHIBAN 1680            3   2  0    33       ALE HOUSE MERCS (5)
 LIZZIE DUSK 1538              8   7  0    31       THE RED BLADES (88)
 MOUNTAIN GOAT 1636            5   4  1    30       THE MOTHERSHIP 011 (128)
 FISH TACO 1687                3   0  0    30       FOOD (130)
 LIZARD MAN 1544               4  10  0    28       MONSTER MANUAL (87)
-HARRISON 1584                 7   4  0    27       FUCHI OWNED (54)
 TRUMAN CAPOTE 1577            6   6  0    27       LITERATE LOONS (40)
 BRUSSEL SPROUTS 1688          2   1  0    26       FOOD (130)
 MEAN JOHN BROWN 1648          3   4  0    24       JUNGLELAND (103)
 MAXIMUM WHAM 1691             3   0  0    24       DEUS EX MACHINA (131)
 ONION RINGS 1684              2   1  0    24       FOOD (130)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 DAWN CERES 1573               5   7  0    22       THE RED BLADES (88)
 LANEL 1619                    5   3  0    22       GFE (126)
 DEUCE 1642                    3   3  0    22       CAPITAL CARTEL (93)
 KING OF ROCK 1709             3   0  0    22       MY TOP RATED (129)
 MICHELLE 1622                 3   5  0    19       GFE (126)
 GREMLIN STEW 1710             3   0  0    18       OTTO'S DINER (96)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 MISS MISERY 1725              2   0  0    18       MY TOP RATED (129)
 BUCK DICH 1660                5   2  0    17       MY TOP RATED (129)
 GAMBLE 1635                   4   5  0    17       THE MOTHERSHIP 011 (128)
 GERANIUM SYLVATICUM 1728      2   0  1    17       SUMMERBORN (104)
 ZADIE SMITH 1701              4   0  0    16       LITERATE LOONS (40)
 HIGGS BOSON 1697              2   1  0    15       RAIN DOGS (132)
 LAODAMEIA 1713                2   1  0    15       ARCHAIC CHAOS (111)
 SUSAN 1665                    4   2  0    14       GFE (126)
 GREGORY PALAMAS 1641          3   5  0    14       DARQUE AGES (29)
 RONIN ZEN 1704                2   2  1    14       ARCHAIC CHAOS (111)
 VALAK 1650                    3   4  0    13       OF WOLF AND MAN (57)
 VON ERIKSON 1692              1   2  0    13       DEUS EX MACHINA (131)
 NIGHT LIES 1663               2   5  0    11       MY TOP RATED (129)
 FEOHR 1737                    1   0  0    11       CLAN LONGBEARD (39)
 ANTENOR 1731                  2   0  0    10       ARCHAIC CHAOS (111)
 IRONHEAD 1722                 2   0  0    10       DRAGONBANE GUILD (13)
 MILAREPA 1695                 1   2  0    10       RAIN DOGS (132)
-BONY LOUIS SOL 1681           2   2  1     9       THE RED BLADES (88)
-OPAL REDD 1708                1   1  0     9       MIDDLE WAY 12 (122)
 OLD THUMPER 1707              2   2  0     8       ALE HOUSE MERCS (5)
 TARA THE RED 1698             2   1  0     8       RAIN DOGS (132)
 '69 GTX 1715                  2   1  0     7       AMERICAN MUSCLE (43)
 HYPNOTIZE 1679                1   4  0     7       MY TOP RATED (129)
 ZARLENE 1726                  1   1  0     7       GFE (126)
 LITTLE DARLING 1700           1   3  0     6       SUMMERBORN (104)
 PEREGRINE 1694                1   2  0     6       RAIN DOGS (132)
 TITAN 1672                    0   6  0     6       MONSTER MANUAL (87)
 LAMB 1696                     1   2  0     5       RAIN DOGS (132)
 HAMBONE 1690                  1   2  0     5       DEUS EX MACHINA (131)
 DUCK CON FEET 1683            0   4  0     4       OTTO'S DINER (96)
 YUK HE 1685                   0   3  0     3       FOOD (130)
 TOSSED SALAD 1686             0   3  0     3       FOOD (130)
 LADY DEATH 1693               0   3  0     3       DEUS EX MACHINA (131)
 JAN HUS 1724                  0   2  0     2       DARQUE AGES (29)
 KRILL 1727                    0   2  0     2       DEUS EX MACHINA (131)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                W  L K TEAM NAME            SLAIN BY              TURN Revenge?
'77 GREMLIN 1644        2  2 0 AMERICAN MUSCLE 43   HOT BROWN 1678        118  REVENGED
GARBAGE MAN 1734        0  1 0 AMERICAN MUSCLE 43   SPYMASTER             122  NONE
OERO PIE 1735           0  1 0 AMERICAN MUSCLE 43   SHEWISH GIANT         122  NONE
BLIND TIM 1669          1  1 0 ARCHAIC CHAOS 111    KATHY 1666            118  REVENGED
GROANER 1653            1  2 0 BATTLE GRUNTS 20     VYGOTSKY 230          118  NONE
QUAD 13 1736            0  1 0 CLAN LONGBEARD 39    BANDIT PRINCE         122  NONE
REXCE 1585              8  4 0 CLAN LONGBEARD 39    TOM WOLFE 1467        122   
SAXO GRAMMATICUS 1590   5  4 1 DARQUE AGES 29       BERNADETTE 1618       120   
VESTRA 1689             0  1 0 DEUS EX MACHINA 131  BONY LOUIS SOL 1681   120  REVENGED
TURIN 1486              8 10 0 DRAGONBANE GUILD 13  QUINN 1634            120  JUST REVENGED
KATHY 1666              1  3 1 GFE 126              RONIN ZEN 1704        120  REVENGED
KINGSLEY AMIS 1658      1  2 0 LITERATE LOONS 40    TU DU 1652            118  NONE
WALKER PERCY 1474       8 13 0 LITERATE LOONS 40    MOLLUSQUOME 1629      122   
PRAISE 1662             2  2 0 MY TOP RATED 129     KNUT SUNDERHELM 1569  119  REVENGED
PIZZARRHEA 1348        16 13 1 OTTO'S DINER 96      PATROCLUS 1410        118  REVENGED
NO DICE SON 1559        4  6 1 SUMMERBORN 104       CHARLES MARTEL 1346   118  JUST REVENGED
BLAH 1733               0  1 0 THE MOTHERSHIP 0 128 SHEWISH GIANT         122  NONE

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Heinrick, and '66 Corvette -- Congrats, and we are surely glad to see you graduate.
-- Agent, Capital Cartel

Ripper Holy Shiitake -- Now THERE's a great Duelmaster.  Kudos! -- Agent, Capital

Wonderface -- I made the basket when it counted, Bud.  (But you sure looked pretty
out there.) -- Bank Shot, Capital Cartel

Juliette -- I didn't have to kick after all.  (Well, maybe I did kick, but not a
ball.) -- Punt, Capital Cartel

Gamble -- I gambled and won.  You, on the other hand, .... -- Deuce, Capital Cartel

Harrison -- Now I am hooked!  (Or were you hooked?) -- Hook, Capital Cartel

Maddened Meerkat -- That was a present of a gutter ball to your Chief Grimmy.  May he
enjoy it to the fullest. -- Gutter Ball, Capital Cartel

Pauly -- That was a great spot!  Kudos.  I agree, it is all Elephant's fault. --
Agent, Capital Cartel
P.S.  Cute employment ad.  Well done!

Arcane Kid -- Ingeniously written.  We really enjoyed your poetry. -- The Capital
Cartel gang

Well, now; that was a pleasing start back.  A very pleasing one, indeed. -- Agent,
Capital Cartel (thinking his job is probably not in jeopardy after all.)

Deus Ex Machina -- Don't worry about making any sort of impression here.  Just play
to win, and let the rest take care of itself. -- Archaic Chaos

Grimm -- What if we had ourselves a little challenge?  What if we ran whatever we got
at least three times?  (The fourth time you could tie a pork chop around its neck and
send it to meet the Shewish guy...)  It might drop the rate hike in DA bribes, if
nothing else! -- Kid Arcane, already considering DA'ing the last two new guys...

     Not pork, please!  The Giant is already having trouble with his weight.  Offer
     him... fish, maybe? -- Arenamaster Jaime Rinvar

Pauly -- Good work!  Hope that thing is housebroken!  (Where does a fire-breathing
gerbil drop a load?  Wherever she wants!) -- Kid Arcane

GFE -- God-Fearing Evangelicals?  Garrulous Female Entertainers?  Gutsy Fire Eaters?
: ^ ) -- Archaic Chaos

Lizard Man -- I heard ya was going to be a Blue Plate Special at Otto's Diner.  Yer
manager's probably haggling over the privilege of naming the dish.  The Kid suggested
Furfuraceous Failure.  I dunno... It has a ring to it... -- Havoc

     Perhaps, but not a BLUE plate.  A lizard would look stunning on black.

Lanel -- Do you even have a pulse?  We'll definitely be doing this again; expect it
to be over much sooner! -- Ronin Zen

Marco Polo -- Told ya!  Just a little tweaking and it's all over!  I'm sure you'll
challenge for a rematch, but I doubt if it'll help. -- Patroclus 

Squashapillar -- Cool name.  What does it mean?  "Pin cushion that bleeds"? --
Pandera Pax

Zadie Smith -- Hey, if you don't attack, I can't riposte.  And wipe the drool from
your face; it's VERY distracting!  -- Laodameia

Krill -- There are predators, and there are prey.  Hint: You should carry a bottle of
soy sauce around your neck! -- Antenor

Judith -- Great job with the commentary, as always!  Thanks for making a fun read
even more enjoyable! -- Kid Arcane
P.S.  Please feel free to make disparaging remarks about a fight whenever it's to my
team's advantage...

Higgs Boson -- Note to self: Next time, thump harder. -- Old Thumper

Harp -- I've decided to send you to the dark arena if you lose this turn.  I don't
like you enough to run you with a losing record.  No pressure. -- Pauly

All -- Probably won't get one in this time, but expect frequent spotlights from me.
-- Pauly

     Plain text (dot txt), please?

Cyber Punk -- Don't annoy me or I'll have Laverne eat you. -- Pauly

Antenor -- Nothing worse than a last second miracle that puts your warrior in the
dirt.  Nice "Lucky" win. -- Krill

Onion Rings -- Any relation to Big Mac?  Next time, hold the onions. -- Lady Death

Ironhead -- Oh, that was shamefully boring.  Only good to come of that fight was
learning I could go that long.  Let's not do this again. -- Von Erikson

Bony Louis Sol -- No disrespectin the Wham! -- Maximum Wham

The Red Blades -- No hard feelings, death happens.  Hopeuflly less in this arena. --
Don Guido

Yuk He -- Hambone don't mix with Yuk He...  What the heck is Yuk He?? -- Hambone

Shadowspire -- I always had this longing to be just a bit more popular in High
School.  After being challenged three times each (out four possible fights-- one BF
the turn before last, and a new warrior this last turn) over the last few turns I
think I shoulda come here to go to school!  As a result, the avoids have come back (I
had almost forgotten that was even an option).  I have not used so many since the
hey-day of Chimlevtal or Arvat!  I look forward to having my warriors face you on the
sands (but not always on your terms)! -- D. Noble

Knut -- You are forgiven for killing Praise... for now!  You've proven to be a "tough
nut," and that last fight scared me off... -- Night Lies

Titan -- Your manager has you fighting in a very interesting way.  I think I like
attacking you a lot better than I'd like trying to parry you! -- Buck Dich

All -- Catching up on some ads from last 3 turns. -- Visionist

Angeroo -- Enjoy your time in the infirmary?  <grin> -- Heinrik

Pit Fiend -- Seven minutes, wow, the ladies must really like you. -- Jaklak

Big Bones Billie -- Thought I was going to be an easy win, did ya!?! -- Heinrik

Cicero -- Two for me and none for you. -- Jaklak

Lizard Man -- Thanks for the easy win, till we meet again. -- Rexce

Doppleganger -- My apologies for the down challenge.  The commission was using
challenges from the previous cycle. -- Heinrik

Bernadette -- Really!?!  Hope you didn't ruin your nails. -- Jaklak

Junebug -- Sometimes I even impress myself. -- Rexce

All -- Heinrik finally recieved his invite, but since he is heading to Storm Rock, I
will not be sharing his detailed info from the commission.  Here are a few teasers,
though.  He is the first 3 Con warrior from the clan to receive invite.  He leaves
with o  <cut off by hal>  <Is that a teaser, or what?>

Shadowspire -- It's with great honor that I accept the position of manager of
American Muscle.  I've played the game off and on for some time.  I go way back with
Elephant.  Anyways, I'd like to think of myself as old school.  I don't do message
boards.  All my interaction will be done here.  See you in the sands. -- Cyberpunk,
Manager, American Muscle

Holy Shiitake -- Grats on the title.  You're a hard little bugger to hit.  Figure I'd
challenge you since I wasn't bloodfueded the previous turn. -- '66 Corvette

All -- For some reason my DM's column was cut off.  I really hope my next manager
learns how to send files plain text.  Anyways, here is my quote and memento for those
who care.  My codex entry comes from Proverbs 17:22  "A cheerful heart is good
medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones."  The memento I'm leaving behind
is Pauly's Pancake recipe.  Best pancakes in Aradi and now Shadowspire. -- '66

     Ah!  That explains it.  It showed up in a duelmaster's column for Kaltos (arena
     #5), sent there by hal, an idiot who sees a numeral five standing more or less
     by itself and apparently can't imagine that it should not go into arena five
     instead of continuing where it was when the writing started.  I saved it and
     would have inserted it into this newsletter, recognizing the proper venue, but
     you havetaken care of it.  Thanks.  Remember, hal is dumb.  Write out numerals.
     It helps. -- the Editor
     P.S.  Or send things directly to me, bypassing hal entirely.  Others in this
     arena can give you my e-ddress, which I don't feel like publishing today.

Consortium -- Elephant is long gone.  No need to send him ads anymore.  Basically now
you're calling Elephant a liar.  He's a good friend of mine and he's a lot of things
but liar he's not.  I'm going to look into what was said and get to the bottom of
this. -- Cyberpunk

Raindogs -- Welcome to Shadowspire. -- American Muscle

Hopefully I don't miss this turn.  I tried faxing my stuff in on Tuesday night, but
it wouldn't go through.  I am crossing my fingers that the RSI ladies are nice enough
to run it for me if I fax it at 6 am Wednesday morning.  If you're reading this RSI
ladies, I will move you up to the top of my Christmas card list if this turn runs! --
Vanek, Manager of Warmasters

Sorry, I'm running really short of time today.  (What else is new?  But even shorter
today.)  So no personals from me.  I'll try to do better next time, but no promises,
the new definition of "normal" is a lot busier than the old one.  Or else I'm slowing
down... nah, it couldn't be that! -- Jorja

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

QUAD 13 was butchered by BANDIT PRINCE in a 1 minute bloody Dark Arena fight.
OERO PIE was slaughtered by SHEWISH GIANT in a 1 minute gruesome Dark Arena battle.
BLAH was murdered by SHEWISH GIANT in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
GARBAGE MAN was slaughtered by SPYMASTER in a 1 minute Dark Arena brawl.
CREIDDY LAD devastated CHARLES MARTEL in a 1 minute one-sided Bloodfeud fight.
JAGER VON DRACHEN demolished QUINN in a 2 minute mismatched Bloodfeud competition.
SPORK was viciously subdued by '66 CORVETTE in a 3 minute Bloodfeud fight.
HOLY SHIITAKE bested PORCUPAIN in a 3 minute veteran's Challenge Title competition.
JAKLAK was handily defeated by PATROCLUS in a 1 minute uneven Challenge melee.
BERNADETTE was unbelievably bested by ARCHON in a 7 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
BIG BONES BILLIE overpowered PUNT in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge fight.
MADDENED MEERKAT overcame MARCO POLO in a 2 minute veteran's Challenge bout.
GUTTER BALL luckily beat DOPPLEGANGER in a 3 minute master's Challenge match.
'71 MACH ONE demolished HOOK in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match.
FIVE overpowered PANDERA PAX in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge conflict.
LIZZIE DUSK was overpowered by SUBPRIME RIB in a 2 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
SISI BA-NETERU slimly won victory over BANK SHOT in a 3 minute Challenge fray.
JULIETTE was viciously subdued by ZIGGY PIKE in a 2 minute gory Challenge brawl.
SQUASHAPILLAR was overpowered by ALP ARSLAN in a 2 minute one-sided Challenge match.
REXCE was killed by TOM WOLFE in a 1 minute bloody Challenge fight.
EARTH ELEMENTAL bested FLAVOR TO GO in a popular 3 minute Challenge contest.
JUNEBUG overpowered DEUCE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
MEAN JOHN BROWN was beaten by CAZADOR in a 2 minute Challenge fray.
GAMBLE lost to BRUSSEL SPROUTS in a 2 minute Challenge fray.
NIGHT LIES was devastated by LIZARD MAN in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge bout.
DAWN CERES was overpowered by GWENNOLAY in a 1 minute uneven Challenge fight.
MAXIMUM WHAM luckily beat RONIN ZEN in a 2 minute beginner's Challenge fight.
HAMBONE was overpowered by KING OF ROCK in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge bout.
VON ERIKSON vanquished DUCK CON FEET in a 1 minute uneven Challenge bout.
ZARLENE overcame JAN HUS in a exciting 1 minute beginner's Challenge bout.
PEREGRINE was overcome by ZADIE SMITH in a 3 minute novice's Challenge duel.
MILAREPA narrowly defeated LITTLE DARLING in a 3 minute beginner's Challenge fight.
KIRIN ICHIBAN handily defeated BUCK DICH in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge fight.
LAMB was subdued by ANTENOR in a 1 minute novice's Challenge fight.
IRONHEAD luckily beat HYPNOTIZE in a action packed 4 minute novice's Challenge bout.
HIGGS BOSON was viciously subdued by FISH TACO in a 4 minute novice's Challenge duel.
MAGIC RAT was demolished by PIT FIEND in a 1 minute one-sided struggle.
ZOG CORNERSTONE was viciously subdued by MADAM MARIE in a 9 minute veteran's fight.
SHILLELAGH TOR savagely defeated ANGEROO in a popular 3 minute veteran's duel.
HEINRIK overpowered VIRGINIA WOOLF in a 1 minute one-sided competition.
FIDGET was unbelievably bested by PABST in a exciting 3 minute gory duel.
BENEDICT demolished VENEMOUS CONCUBINE in a 2 minute uneven duel.
BECK viciously subdued MOUNTAIN GOAT in a 3 minute bloody match.
NIKUS was vanquished by WONDERFACE in a 1 minute one-sided conflict.
MOLLUSQUOME butchered WALKER PERCY in a 1 minute mismatched match.
JERSEY DEVIL was handily defeated by KNUT SUNDERHELM in a 1 minute one-sided conflict.
HARP savagely defeated LANEL in a exciting 5 minute gory fight.
TRUMAN CAPOTE won victory over GREGORY PALAMAS in a 3 minute bout.
MICHELLE overpowered TITAN in a 1 minute one-sided fray.
SUSAN overcame YUK HE in a 3 minute brutal duel.
VALAK was subdued by MISS MISERY in a 2 minute conflict.
LADY DEATH was beaten by GERANIUM SYLVATICUM in a 2 minute novice's battle.
TOSSED SALAD was luckily beaten by TARA THE RED in a 2 minute amateur's bout.
ONION RINGS devastated '69 GTX in a crowd pleasing 1 minute brutal one-sided conflict.
OLD THUMPER was luckily beaten by FEOHR in a 2 minute bloody novice's brawl.
GREMLIN STEW outlasted KRILL in a unpopular 13 minute amateur's battle.
LAODAMEIA overpowered CONVICTED THIEF in a 1 minute uneven bout.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                  25         TOTAL PARRY       88 -  49 -  1      64  |
|BASHING ATTACK                  16         PARRY-STRIKE      52 -  40 -  4      57  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                 14         WALL OF STEEL     58 -  58 -  3      50  |
|TOTAL PARRY                     11         STRIKING ATTACK   99 - 104 -  5      49  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                    10         PARRY-LUNGE       20 -  22 -  1      48  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  9         LUNGING ATTACK   107 - 121 -  8      47  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    9         SLASHING ATTACK   46 -  58 -  5      44  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    6         AIMED BLOW        32 -  43 -  1      43  |
|AIMED BLOW                       5         PARRY-RIPOSTE     35 -  51 -  1      41  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      3         BASHING ATTACK    61 -  89 -  7      41  |

Turn 122 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

TOTAL PARRY        8 -  3     SLASHING ATTACK    4 -  5         3  TOTAL PARRY    
PARRY-STRIKE       7 -  3     WALL OF STEEL      4 -  5         3  STRIKING ATTACK
PARRY-LUNGE        2 -  1     AIMED BLOW         2 -  3         2  WALL OF STEEL  
PARRY-RIPOSTE      3 -  3     LUNGING ATTACK    10 - 15         1  PARRY-RIPOSTE  
STRIKING ATTACK    7 -  7     BASHING ATTACK     6 - 10         1  BASHING ATTACK 
                                                                1  PARRY-LUNGE    

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
PARRY-RIPOSTE    HOLY SHIITAKE 1433         18   6  0  126 OTTO'S DINER (96)
BASHING ATTACK   SHILLELAGH TOR 1294        21  18  1  120 THE RED BLADES (88)
WALL OF STEEL    PATROCLUS 1410             15   8  2  115 ARCHAIC CHAOS (111)
TOTAL PARRY      MADAM MARIE 1356           23   9  0  107 JUNGLELAND (103)
STRIKING ATTACK  PIT FIEND 1344             17  16  1  105 MONSTER MANUAL (87)
LUNGING ATTACK   BERNADETTE 1618             6   2  1   84 GFE (126)
PARRY-STRIKE     MARCO POLO 1375            17  11  2   83 DARQUE AGES (29)
AIMED BLOW       MAGIC RAT 1317             20  17  0   82 JUNGLELAND (103)
PARRY-LUNGE      BENEDICT 1470              12   9  0   82 OF WOLF AND MAN (57)
SLASHING ATTACK  FIDGET 1403                17  11  2   74 LA PENTARCHIE (11)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is PIT FIEND 1344.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was HARP 744.  The ten other most popular fighters were FIDGET 1403, FLAVOR TO GO 

The least popular fighter this week was GREMLIN STEW 1710.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were TITAN 1672, JERSEY DEVIL 1638, WALKER PERCY 1474, NIKUS 1583, 
and HAMBONE 1690.

The following warriors will travel to AD after next turn:


The following warriors have traveled to AD after fighting this turn: