DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER
Date : 02/14/2018 Duedate: 02/27/2018
SHADOWSPIRE ARENA
DM-81 TURN-287
This Weeks Top Honors
THE DUELMASTER IS
BOALZEBUL
MONSTER MANUAL (87)
(81-2946) [11-2-1,119]
Chartered Recognition Leader Unchartered Recognition Leader
BOALZEBUL FEAR
MONSTER MANUAL (87) UYPHY ASYLUM (180)
(81-2946) [11-2-1,119] (81-2974) [6-2-0,60]
Popularity Leader This Weeks Favorite
SIR RACHA SIR RACHA
OTTO'S DINER (96) OTTO'S DINER (96)
(81-2853) [14-10-0,92] (81-2853) [14-10-0,92]
THE CURRENT TOP TEAM
MONSTER MANUAL (87)
TEAMS ON THE MOVE TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name Point Gain Chartered Team
1. FROM THE LEFT (166) 60
2. INEBRIATION (27) 56 SHANGHAIED (161)
3. DARQUE AGES (29) 35 Unchartered Team
4. PRAY THE GODS (155) 34
5. WICKED MARTYRS (148) 27 UYPHY ASYLUM (180)
The Top Teams
Career Win-Loss Record W L K % Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns W L K
1/ 1*UYPHY ASYLUM (180) 24 16 1 60.0 1/ 1 MONSTER MANUAL (87) 9 6 1
2/ 2 SHANGHAIED (161) 172 130 8 57.0 2/ 5 BIG LAKE SOLUTION (178) 8 6 0
3/ 3 CULT OF BACCHUS (4) 561 445 20 55.8 3/ 2 CULT OF BACCHUS (4) 8 7 0
4/ 4 DARQUE AGES (29) 620 566 27 52.3 4/ 7*UYPHY ASYLUM (180) 7 3 1
5/ 5 OTTO'S DINER (96) 575 531 28 52.0 5/ 3 OTTO'S DINER (96) 7 8 0
6/ 6 WICKED MARTYRS (148) 276 255 11 52.0 6/ 8 WICKED MARTYRS (148) 6 8 0
7/ 7 KILL EM ALL (173) 92 88 5 51.1 7/ 6 KILL EM ALL (173) 6 9 0
8/ 9 BIG LAKE SOLUTION (178) 40 42 3 48.8 8/12 INEBRIATION (27) 5 5 0
9/ 8 PRAY THE GODS (155) 168 178 12 48.6 9/11 DARQUE AGES (29) 5 8 0
10/10 FROM THE LEFT (166) 71 78 4 47.7 10/ 9 PRAY THE GODS (155) 4 5 1
11/11 MONSTER MANUAL (87) 498 595 21 45.6 11/ 4 SHANGHAIED (161) 4 5 0
12/12 INEBRIATION (27) 167 259 13 39.2 12/10 FROM THE LEFT (166) 4 6 0
'*' Unchartered team '-' Team did not fight this turn
(###) Avoid teams by their Team Id ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank
DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
Notes from the arena champ.
Greetings one and all.
I hold the prestigious DM title once again of the finest no-tourney arena
in the lands. I probably would have recaptured the title earlier if my trusty
scimitar wasn't so maliciously broken by Two-Ton! I think that BlackHart may
have notched my scimitar to weaken it prior to that fight!
I have have been blessed by the mighty Lord Bacchus when it comes to
favorites for my style. The commission has said that I love the scimitar, (I
pretty much knew that) and I enjoy a high offensive effort and a very high
activity level and I learn parry skills the easiest. Those favorites are the
trifecta of goodness for my style! Someday, I may get to try them out in ADM
or even in a tourney!
Until the next CoB warrior takes the throne...
LP Slaycia
SPY REPORT
Good afternoon, you lovely people of Shadowspire! Phineas thought you gents
needed a lady's touch on this day of love, so he has asked me to deliver the spy
report. I am Sidara Brightbell. I typically do my spy reporting in Seam, but I was
happy to travel south for an overdue vacation. I see Vlad is here. I will try not to
let that ruin my day. Let's get to the fights, my sweets!
Slaycia flies the coop and it is time to crown a new Duelmaster. Slaycia did not
sit idly by on her final turn. She posted a challenge to the formidable Sphinx. It
took 2 minutes, but Slaycia leaves with a win. Monster Manual was bummed that Sphinx
was unable to take the throne, but the sour mood changed a bit later. Another Monster
Manual fighter, Boalzebul, received a challenge from the Cult of Bacchus guild.
Blythe was most likely seeking to impress the arena officials and take the throne by
recognition points. Boalzebul saw the scenario unfolding a bit differently. He
killed Blythe and ended the cycle with enough recognition points to take the throne
himself. Congrats to the newest Duelmaster, Boalzebul!
The most avoided team for the turn was Otto's Diner. Someone must have tried the
Cod Piece! Wicked Martyrs was tagged as avoiding the Diner the most. The most
challenged warrior for the turn was Psycho Styx. He got a rather unfriendly challenge
from Moduin of Darque Ages. I call it unfriendly because it was a 29 point down
challenge. No one is surprised that Moduin overcame Psycho Styx. I reached out to
Master Darque to see if there was a story with this challenge, but his only response
was, "No comment!"
Gladiators are going to get hurt. It is part of the job. Gladiators are also
going to die. It is one of the key downsides to the job, but some enjoy the thrill of
tempting the Fates and playing a rousing game of hide-and-seek with Ahringhol.
Shadowspire lost a few warriors this cycle. The most notable, Blythe, has been
mentioned already. Darque Ages, From the Left, Otto's Diner, and Wicked Martyrs sent
gladiators to the Dark Arena. The only other death on the regular arena sands came in
a match between Pray the Gods and From the Left. For whatever reason, these two
factions feel diametrically opposed to one another. Is it just me? Anyway, Rutu
Parna executed Race Baiter in a 2 minute fight! Everyone was a bit surprised, but no
one more than Race Baiter!
Monster Manual remains the top team in the arena. Big Lake Solution jumps up to
2nd place after a 3-2-0 turn. Cult of Bacchus slips 1 to 3rd place. Uyphy Asylum and
Otto's Diner round out the top 5. The biggest gain for the turn belongs to
Inebriation, who rose 4 spots after going 4-1-0. The biggest slip in the rankings
goes to Shanghaied, who fell 7 places. Their new fighters failed to report, so this
is perhaps the result of their absence.
Time for me to go, my darlings! I hope you have had as much fun as I did! I
will be returning to Seam sometime this week. You'll be back to your regularly rage-
fueled spy report with Huard or Phineas next turn. Boalzebul has taken the throne
relatively early in his career, can he hold onto it? Come back next turn and find
out!
-- Sidara Brightbell
DUELMASTER W L K POINTS TEAM NAME
BOALZEBUL 2946 11 2 1 119 MONSTER MANUAL (87)
CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME
MODUIN 2909 13 6 1 106 DARQUE AGES (29)
BARSTOOL BRAD 2706 15 13 1 105 INEBRIATION (27)
VIDHI 2840 16 6 1 103 PRAY THE GODS (155)
DESTINY 2703 19 23 0 102 WICKED MARTYRS (148)
SPHINX 2755 14 18 2 96 MONSTER MANUAL (87)
THREE SHEETS 2869 15 8 1 92 SHANGHAIED (161)
SIR RACHA 2853 14 10 0 92 OTTO'S DINER (96)
CHAMPIONS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME
MALAKAI 2768 21 15 1 88 KILL EM ALL (173)
MELLOW JELLO 2784 24 10 0 82 OTTO'S DINER (96)
MIGHTY MIXON 2870 12 10 0 82 CULT OF BACCHUS (4)
CHOKE 2767 19 17 0 81 KILL EM ALL (173)
NO-TEETH KEITH 2852 16 10 2 81 SHANGHAIED (161)
BRACKISH 2782 15 20 1 81 WICKED MARTYRS (148)
PSYCHO STYX 2771 18 18 1 73 KILL EM ALL (173)
CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME
CHILD SMASHER 2941 8 6 1 66 BIG LAKE SOLUTION (178)
SUBPAR SUE 2812 17 14 0 65 WICKED MARTYRS (148)
QUICK 2926 10 7 1 61 BIG LAKE SOLUTION (178)
FEAR 2974 6 2 0 60 UYPHY ASYLUM (180)
ADEPTS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME
STARVING ARTIST 2956 6 7 0 52 FROM THE LEFT (166)
SOWER MOOD 2942 5 10 1 49 BIG LAKE SOLUTION (178)
THE SMILE 2973 6 2 0 45 UYPHY ASYLUM (180)
GROUCHO SERF 3002 2 4 2 44 DARQUE AGES (29)
PIERCER 2854 10 12 1 43 MONSTER MANUAL (87)
MARTIAL SLAW 2954 7 7 0 41 OTTO'S DINER (96)
BENJAMIN 2905 9 10 0 40 WICKED MARTYRS (148)
SKINNY LENNY 2971 6 4 0 39 SHANGHAIED (161)
CHALLENGER INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME
THE LEPER'S HAND 2940 8 7 0 33 BIG LAKE SOLUTION (178)
RED DOG 2878 6 2 0 33 INEBRIATION (27)
PALE AL 2839 3 11 0 33 INEBRIATION (27)
POETRY SLAM 3017 2 1 0 33 FROM THE LEFT (166)
BOOMBOOM 2995 4 1 0 32 UYPHY ASYLUM (180)
TOM COLLINS 2790 5 15 1 31 INEBRIATION (27)
HAMM 2879 2 6 0 30 INEBRIATION (27)
AZABELLE 2949 5 8 0 29 CULT OF BACCHUS (4)
INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME
GREASE TRAP 2998 4 1 1 23 OTTO'S DINER (96)
THE OAK 2972 4 4 0 23 UYPHY ASYLUM (180)
RUTU PARNA 3014 2 0 1 21 PRAY THE GODS (155)
M'LORD 2959 4 8 0 20 CULT OF BACCHUS (4)
HATEFUL RHETORIC 3026 1 1 0 19 FROM THE LEFT (166)
BOTTOM FEEDER 2989 4 4 1 17 KILL EM ALL (173)
PHOBIA 2988 4 3 1 16 UYPHY ASYLUM (180)
NIGHT HAG 2980 4 2 0 14 MONSTER MANUAL (87)
NAGAVARMA 3032 1 0 0 14 DARQUE AGES (29)
INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME
BARD BOINNE 3031 1 0 0 13 DARQUE AGES (29)
MIMIC 2997 3 2 0 11 MONSTER MANUAL (87)
YELLOW BELLEY 3012 2 2 0 8 KILL EM ALL (173)
TUTTER 3015 1 1 0 5 PRAY THE GODS (155)
SILPA 3022 0 2 0 2 PRAY THE GODS (155)
SPECIAL PURPOSE 3033 0 1 0 1 BIG LAKE SOLUTION (178)
'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.
THE DEAD W L K TEAM NAME SLAIN BY TURN Revenge?
BLYTHE 2829 13 15 2 CULT OF BACCHUS 4 BOALZEBUL 2946 287
DA57 3030 0 1 0 DARQUE AGES 29 WURM KIN 287 NONE
RACE BAITER 2992 3 3 0 FROM THE LEFT 166 RUTU PARNA 3014 287
SAFE SPACE 3016 0 3 0 FROM THE LEFT 166 SPYMASTER 287 NONE
ORIN SCRIVELLO 2899 8 8 0 KILL EM ALL 173 GROUCHO SERF 3002 283 JUST REVENGED
MOP WRINGER 3029 0 1 0 OTTO'S DINER 96 BLACK ORC 287 NONE
NAPKIN HOLDER 3004 0 2 0 OTTO'S DINER 96 PHOBIA 2988 285 JUST REVENGED
MENSK 2655 0 3 0 WAR MACHINE 26 GREASE TRAP 2998 283 NOT REVENGED
DAYVEON 3028 0 1 0 WICKED MARTYRS 148 SHEWISH GIANT 287 NONE
PERSONAL ADS
M'Lord -- Lord have mercy! -- Yellow Belly
Groucho Serf -- I've taught you well. Time to sink or swim. -- Choke
Piercer -- What are you doing down here? -- Bottom Feeder
Mellow Jello -- You again? Oh, how droll... -- Malakai
Slaycia -- Good riddance. -- Malakai
Slaycia -- Congrats on your invite. -- BlackHart
Sir Racha -- Oooh...please do bloodfeud Phobia. I would pay to see that. -- BlackHart
Monster Manual -- Congrats on your 12-3 record over the last 3 turns! -- BlackHart
Vidhi -- Boom, baby! Did I break a few ribs? Can you still use that arm? That was
thweet! -- No-Teeth Keith
The Leper's Hand -- The Fates matched us up again, and now we are even. I, however,
am still the better looking one. -- Skinny Lenny
Boalzebul -- Holy schnikeys! Spear flash thish way, spear flash that way...I swear you
had two of 'em. You didn't have two, did ya? I see double a lot. Where's my rum?
-- Three Sheets
All -- Unbelievable! My two newest recruits slipped their handlers AGAIN! The search
is on in every alehouse, farmhouse, bathhouse, outhouse, and brothelhouse. I fully
expect to find them indulging in their favorite activity with each other. If anyone
hears news of Eye-Patch Willy or Helen Bade, please send word. -- BlackHart
LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS
SAFE SPACE was butchered by SPYMASTER in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
MOP WRINGER was dealt death by BLACK ORC in a 1 minute Dark Arena duel.
DAYVEON was murdered by SHEWISH GIANT in a 1 minute Dark Arena melee.
DA57 was murdered by WURM KIN in a 1 minute gruesome Dark Arena fight.
CHOKE devastated GROUCHO SERF in a 1 minute one-sided Bloodfeud contest.
MARTIAL SLAW overpowered PHOBIA in a 1 minute mismatched Bloodfeud match.
SLAYCIA viciously subdued SPHINX in a 2 minute bloody veteran's Challenge duel.
BLYTHE was killed by BOALZEBUL in a 1 minute Challenge Title brawl.
MODUIN handily defeated PSYCHO STYX in a 1 minute uneven Challenge fight.
VIDHI vanquished MELLOW JELLO in a 1 minute gruesome uneven Challenge duel.
MIGHTY MIXON was outlasted by THREE SHEETS in a 7 minute gory expert's Challenge duel.
DESTINY defeated SIR RACHA in a popular 3 minute expert's Challenge match.
QUICK was defeated by BRACKISH in a exciting 1 minute Challenge match.
CHILD SMASHER viciously subdued SUBPAR SUE in a 3 minute Challenge conflict.
THE LEPER'S HAND demolished SILPA in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge brawl.
AZABELLE was overcome by BENJAMIN in a 2 minute Challenge conflict.
BOTTOM FEEDER was overpowered by PALE AL in a 2 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
M'LORD was devastated by RED DOG in a 2 minute uneven Challenge duel.
HAMM overpowered TUTTER in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge brawl.
RUTU PARNA delivered the death blow upon RACE BAITER in a 2 minute Challenge fight.
POETRY SLAM overpowered NIGHT HAG in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge match.
HATEFUL RHETORIC beat MIMIC in a 2 minute novice's Challenge match.
NO-TEETH KEITH was handily defeated by BARSTOOL BRAD in a 2 minute competition.
MALAKAI overpowered VETERAN MERCENARY in a 1 minute uneven fight.
SOWER MOOD demolished THE OAK in a 1 minute uneven bout.
PIERCER was viciously subdued by THE SMILE in a crowd pleasing 1 minute gory fray.
STARVING ARTIST subdued SKINNY LENNY in a 2 minute fight.
FEAR overpowered DANGEROUS CRIMINAL in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
BOOMBOOM defeated TOM COLLINS in a 1 minute novice vs. veteran upset duel.
YELLOW BELLEY was savagely defeated by NAGAVARMA in a 1 minute novice's melee.
GREASE TRAP handily defeated SPECIAL PURPOSE in a 1 minute uneven bout.
BARD BOINNE overpowered CONVICTED THIEF in a 2 minute uneven competition.
BATTLE REPORT
MOST POPULAR RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS
|FIGHTING STYLE FIGHTS FIGHTING STYLE W - L - K PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK 14 PARRY-LUNGE 26 - 14 - 3 65 |
|BASHING ATTACK 9 AIMED BLOW 31 - 27 - 0 53 |
|WALL OF STEEL 7 TOTAL PARRY 21 - 20 - 0 51 |
|STRIKING ATTACK 6 SLASHING ATTACK 21 - 20 - 0 51 |
|SLASHING ATTACK 5 BASHING ATTACK 39 - 39 - 4 50 |
|PARRY-LUNGE 5 WALL OF STEEL 32 - 36 - 0 47 |
|AIMED BLOW 4 LUNGING ATTACK 68 - 77 - 3 47 |
|TOTAL PARRY 4 PARRY-STRIKE 5 - 7 - 0 42 |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE 2 STRIKING ATTACK 22 - 32 - 3 41 |
|PARRY-STRIKE 1 PARRY-RIPOSTE 11 - 19 - 0 37 |
Turn 287 was great if you Not so great if you used The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles: the fighting styles: top eleven warriors are:
PARRY-STRIKE 1 - 0 BASHING ATTACK 4 - 5 4 WALL OF STEEL
STRIKING ATTACK 4 - 2 LUNGING ATTACK 6 - 8 3 LUNGING ATTACK
SLASHING ATTACK 3 - 2 PARRY-LUNGE 2 - 3 3 TOTAL PARRY
WALL OF STEEL 4 - 3 TOTAL PARRY 1 - 3 1 AIMED BLOW
AIMED BLOW 2 - 2
PARRY-RIPOSTE 1 - 1
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE
FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME
LUNGING ATTACK BOALZEBUL 2946 11 2 1 119 MONSTER MANUAL (87)
TOTAL PARRY BARSTOOL BRAD 2706 15 13 1 105 INEBRIATION (27)
AIMED BLOW VIDHI 2840 16 6 1 103 PRAY THE GODS (155)
WALL OF STEEL THREE SHEETS 2869 15 8 1 92 SHANGHAIED (161)
BASHING ATTACK CHOKE 2767 19 17 0 81 KILL EM ALL (173)
STRIKING ATTACK CHILD SMASHER 2941 8 6 1 66 BIG LAKE SOLUTION (178)
PARRY-RIPOSTE QUICK 2926 10 7 1 61 BIG LAKE SOLUTION (178)
SLASHING ATTACK THE SMILE 2973 6 2 0 45 UYPHY ASYLUM (180)
FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.
The overall popularity leader is SIR RACHA 2853. The most popular warrior this turn
was SIR RACHA 2853. The ten other most popular fighters were CHILD SMASHER 2941,
THREE SHEETS 2869, PALE AL 2839, THE SMILE 2973, AZABELLE 2949, RUTU PARNA 3014,
MODUIN 2909, VIDHI 2840, MIGHTY MIXON 2870, and BRACKISH 2782.
The least popular fighter this week was SPECIAL PURPOSE 3033. The other ten least
popular fighters were YELLOW BELLEY 3012, THE OAK 2972, NIGHT HAG 2980, TUTTER 3015,
M'LORD 2959, SILPA 3022, MELLOW JELLO 2784, PSYCHO STYX 2771, PHOBIA 2988, and
GROUCHO SERF 3002.
The following warriors will travel to AD after next turn:
VIDHI (81-2840) PRAY THE GODS (155)
The following warriors have traveled to AD after fighting this turn:
SLAYCIA (81-2850) CULT OF BACCHUS (4)
Mission to the Twisted Lands
Episode One
Old Brown could run pretty fast if properly motivated, but mostly he walked with
a long-legged, distance-devouring stride. He was a huge horse, a half-giant's
warhorse, shaggy and self-assured, with muscles like half-buried boulders in his
shoulders and hips. Lounging in the saddle was the motivating force, the half-giant,
Keel Woodhaven. Although in his mind he was slouching and half-asleep, he sat up
straight in the saddle since that is more comfortable for riding.
It was twilight, stars coming out above and lights in farmhouse windows below.
They traveled through vineyards, brown and fallow now in the winter, descending gently
toward the tree-crowded coast. The distant trees, not just pines, were green. They
stayed green because the marsh that surrounded the city-state of Bonsur had hot
springs in it.
Keel Woodhaven had always liked Bonsur. It had a relaxed feel about it, the
women seemed prettier, the music was great, everyone thought about having fun. And
the booze was excellent, of course. He passed the arena at the edge of town, and
paused to read the current statistics, posted on the gate and lit by a lantern. So,
an elven cobbler was the Duelmaster? Why would a shoemaker take up such a painful
profession? Then he noticed the team name: Shewish Picnic. He snorted. That
explained it, all right. As a half-Shew, he was kind of bothered by that team theme,
which was present in Home Guard as well. It was sort of funny though. He saw that
Elf Cobbler was headed for the Isle. Probably not bound for Home Guard just yet,
though.
They passed a small chicken ranch. A rooster uttered an untimely crow. At about
that time, Old Brown took exception to something and bolted. Cussing, Keel hauled on
the reins, to little effect since the horse was stronger than him and apparently
frightened. He didn't see the masked men coming out of their hiding places behind
him, looking frustrated. At least not until a crossbow bolt thunked into the backside
of his leather cuirass. His horse screamed and ran faster.
Hauling Old Brown to the left as they passed a set of big open gates into a well-
lighted courtyard, Keel got them behind the shelter of the high stone wall, and patted
the horse's sweaty neck. "You're okay now, friend. I'll go take care of those
bozos."
As he dismounted, he noticed he was becoming surrounded by uniformed men, some
with swords and some with halberds.
"Howdy?" he said, hoping they were friendly.
"Your horse has been shot," said someone, pointing at a bolt sticking out of Old
Brown's butt.
"Well damn!" Keel laid a comforting hand on the horse's flank, which quivered.
"So have you," the guard continued.
"Yeah, thought so. Doesn't feel like it got through the armor though." Keel
tried to look over his shoulder, but could only see the feathered end of the bolt.
"Who are you guys?"
"We are the Queen's Guard."
"What? Queen Gemra? Okay, please take care of Old Brown here, and I'll go find
the ***holes that shot him."
"Sir, you are mistaken. You will be taken to a doctor. We will arrest the
assailants."
"Hey! I'm on a mission from Sheila Greywand. Anyway, they shot my horse. My
HORSE! I'm gonna get 'em." Unslinging his huge sword, Keel strode toward the gate.
Four Guardsmen came with him, flanking him like the trailing ends of a flock of
geese. They might have intended a different formation, but he had the longest legs
and walked the fastest. The one who'd spoken to him before said, "I'm Corporal Brat
Langerman. And you are?"
"Keel Woodhaven."
"I've heard of you! The Queen will want to meet you."
"That's fine. Let's stick to the sides of these buildings. If they're still
around, we'll be targets in the middle of the street."
They weren't quiet, exactly, since the guards wore highly polished chain mail
which jingled. However, Bonsur had a lively night life. Music and laughter came from
bars and nightclubs on adjacent streets, people lingered on corners chatting and
sometimes playing instruments, and children hawked newssheets, shoeshines, flowers, a
selection of rouges, and offered to carry packages. So the sounds the guards made
weren't too noticeable.
Keel led the way back to the chicken ranch. He was thinking that the bad guys
wouldn't have waited around to be hunted. They might have left clues, though.
Perhaps even a discarded, crumpled note offering a cash reward for his head, and
signed by a notorious crimelord. Or distinctive cigar stubs, monogrammed hankies...
personalized masks. Tracks of boots made by elven cobblers. Anything. Witnesses,
even.
There were no people on the street near the chicken ranch. It was full night
now, a bit chilly although there was a warm and slightly funky breeze from the marsh.
Corporal Brat Langerman said quietly, "Is this where it happened?"
"Yup."
"Well, I don't think they're here anymore."
Keel was about to agree, when a crossbow bolt appeared in the Corporal's arm.
The young man hissed, "Everybody down!"
The guardsmen hunkered against the wall of a hardware store, which didn't offer
anything resembling good cover except that they were in shadow there. Keel crouched a
little, but he knew he was a pretty big target, plus his sword gave off a faint
greenish glow. He looked around, searching the darkness for signs of their foes.
A shadow on top of a shaded walkway across the street shifted a little. Keel
pulled a weighted dart out of his pocket and hurled it. He was good at tavern darts,
but it was dark, the distance was too great, and he just wasn't lucky. The little
missile clattered against the shingles of the porch roof. There was a startled twitch
from the half-seen form. At that instant, Keel lunged across the street. His long
legs carried him across to the opposite shadows in three bounds. More bolts came out
of the darkness, one lodging in his calf, the others missing him altogether.
Now the Guardsmen had a good idea where their foes were, and it takes a while to
reload a crossbow. The four men charged, yelling wildly. Tucking his sword under his
arm, Keel grabbed one of the posts holding up the porch roof, strained, and dislodged
it. After a moment he yanked it out of the structure entirely. The roof sagged,
there was a yelp of surprise, and someone's foot appeared off the edge of it. Keel
grabbed him by the ankle and hauled him the rest of the way down.
There were brief sounds of fighting, then footsteps that rapidly receded down an
alley. Three Guardsmen raced off in pursuit. Keel's prisoner started to try to get
away, so the half-Shew tossed him up, grabbed him by the arms and bashed him against
the wall.
"Are you okay?" asked Brat, sheathing his sword.
"Took one in the leg, but it's not too bad I think," Keel said, shifting his
unconscious prisoner to one hand and bending to pick up his sword.
"I'll help you tie that one up," Brat said. "There's a dead one here. I think
there were two more." He grunted slightly, trying to reach something with his injured
arm. "Got some ties in my right-hand belt pouch. If you could get them for me?"
They bound the prisoner, then bandaged each other.
"What did they want?" asked the Corporal.
Keel shrugged. "No clue. Let's get him somewhere safe and we can ask him..."
He listened. "Your guys are coming back."
"Yeah."
The Guardsmen hadn't been able to track their assailants in the darkness, but at
least there were no further injuries. The group of them returned warily to the
courtyard of the Guard House, where a woman was smearing some kind of ointment on Old
Brown's wound. After the horse was bedded down in the stable, the Guardsmen led Keel
into their office, where there was a welcome scent of fresh coffee. The medic set
about binding Keel's wound and that of the Corporal, who turned out to be an extremely
handsome man. Keel remembered hearing that Queen Gemra required her Guardsmen to be
good looking. That didn't mean they weren't competent, though. Brat had done pretty
well.
The medic roused their prisoner with smelling salts. They all sat in the main
office, Corporal Langerman facing the miscreant, who was seated in a cushioned chair,
looking reasonably comfortable except for his bandaged head. "All right," said Brat.
"Now I want you to tell me that you're going to turn Queen's Evidence."
"Not on your life, pretty boy!" The man had, perhaps, some excuse for hard
feelings since he was more homely than not, with a crooked nose and eyes set too close
together. He and Keel looked shabby and ill-favored amongst all these gleamingly
handsome Guardsmen.
Keel leaned forward. "You guys shot my horse."
"Oh. Sorry, didn't mean to do that. We were just shooting at you."
"Why?"
"Glowing sword."
"What?"
"Duh, it's a magic sword! We saw it when you drew it in Delarq Tor, and figured
we could sell it so we followed you."
The half-Shew snorted. "The Dentless isn't magic. It was in a Chaos Gate for
five hundred years and it picked up some energy, that's all. All it does, is glow.
And cut things."
The bandit looked chagrined. "But... it's got to be magic."
"Ain't. Sorry kid."
After that, Keel was taken to enjoy a sumptuous dinner at the Palace. Queen
Gemra was a definite babe, with long, silken black hair, a delicate pouty face, and
luscious curves. She asked him about his mission, which was to go to the Twisted
Lands and shut down a leaking Chaos Gate. He entertained her with the story of his
adventure on the Two-Shew Express, and she gave him a brown velvet cloak to show her
appreciation. She did not invite him to her bed, which was fine because his heart
belonged to another, always and forever.
* * * * *
This is a continuing adventure.
Watch for future chapters in the Bonsur and Home Guard newsletters!