ADVANCED DUELMASTERS

Date   : 12/31/2003    Duedate: 01/13/2004

HOME GUARD

DM-101    TURN-366

RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %  RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %
  1 COLLEGE RADI 98/1223  116   61  0 65.5   13 CISUM S. EKA 31/1175  155  167  5 48.1
  2 CHAMPIONS 4/930       373  243  1 60.6      DRAKE'S BAR-B-Q 15/313                
    SHADOW GOLD 71/1143                         DRAKE'S PETTING ZOO 33/1075           
  3-BLADES OF ICE 7/162   321  238  6 57.4   14 NINJAS 7/1060         147  173  1 45.9
    BLADES OF STEEL 17/1068                     FROM THE FACE 18/1265                 
  4 MAGICK 60/955         479  394  4 54.9      SCIENCE FICTION 6/1152                
    FORCE OF NATURE 75/747                      RESURRECTION 2/1065                   
    AND SO IT BEGINS 65/1062                 15 CARNIVAL 11/1105       48   58  0 45.3
    CARTOUCHE 71/1111                           CARNIVAL 47/1238                      
    EDGE OF EXTINCTION 71/973                16 VIOLENT FEMS 35/972   378  505  9 42.8
  5 QUBIT 10/1136         671  558  3 54.6      JUST BECAUSE 38/1228                  
    VERMIN!! 82/1124                         17-THRILLZ & KIL 7/1211   10   15  1 40.0
    JOKA MASHER! 60/833                         SUPERIOR KILLS 98/1229                
    SIR AGLIO 10/788                            SHAO-LIN HEROES 14/1253               
    TRIPLE CROWN 15/990                         WORLDWIDE PANIC 36/1263               
    SNOTZI'S II 33/813                       18 MY PETS 9/554         440  704 11 38.5
    VERMIN! 82/1267                             GIRL SCOUT COOKIES 33/812             
    JOKA MASHER 82/917                          RHYME TYME 55/449                     
  6-LOST SOULS II 9/918    36   31  0 53.7   19 HARLEQUINS 2/1186      57   95  1 37.5
    LOST SOULS II 4/1247                        WAR HAWKS 10/1026                     
  7-YOU FEEL THA 82/1205  102   92  1 52.6      ASTRONOMICAL 7/1264                   
  8 ANARCHY 19/1151        16   15  0 51.6   20 TOWNSVILLAIN 10/1252   16   27  0 37.2
    INDIFFERENCE 7/1250                         POWERPUFF GIRLS 12/1145               
    INSIGNIFICANCE 74/1266                   21 BLUE MOON 9/1025      407  696  3 36.9
  9-THE GREENHOU 30/1219   72   71  0 50.3      BAD APPLES 56/1091                    
    GERFEL'S FRIENDS 11/516                     REFORMERS 64/1095                     
    ANDORIAN UNIVERSITY 66/1123                 CIRQUE DU MASQUES 58/1093             
 10 SWEORDMASTERS 1/1210   41   41  0 50.0   22-U.B.O.S.M. 11/1184     24   42  1 36.4
    MANNEQUIN'S BEST 1/1227                  23-THE GUARDIANS 19/176    3    7  0 30.0
    SUGAR AND SPICE 7/1231                      MYTH AND MIGHT 2/714                  
 11 EMETICS 45/1242        31   32  0 49.2      THE GUARDIANS 21/939                  
    JOYS OF BOOZE 33/1209                    24-MY DRUGS 98/1222        8   20  0 28.6
 12-OVERLORDS 20/30       110  114  1 49.1      SANDS OF TIME 38/1195                 
    THE STORMGUARDS 31/132                   25 IKER'S CORPS 99/1225    3    8  0 27.3

    '##/###' Avoid teams by their Team Id     '-'  Team did not fight this turn

                                  WARRIOR SPOTLIGHT

          + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ The Tides of Magic #18 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +

Not Talahya:

     Carris Fallstar glanced around the interior quickly.  The light was red and
seemed dim, though it was hot.  Five free-standing hearths burned aromatic wood, or
maybe it would be better to say that aromatic woods smoldered on the hearths.  There
was more smoke than flame and light coming from them.  What little he could make out
seemed slightly blurred--three large lizard men and some anonymous pieces of
furniture.  It smelled strange, spicy, musty, cloying without being sweet, an acrid
undernote.  Reptilian, he supposed.  "I suppose those three are the leaders, chiefs
or captains or whatever--"
     "But they aren't reptiles," Moonjumper murmured, standing close behind him.  Not
that she would have been overheard, as Thristle was making a long statement in his
own language.  "At least, not what we'd call reptiles--they're warm-blooded."
     "Then why do they keep it so blasted hot?" Scarlatti growled in his other ear.
     "Must be what they're used to from their own world," Rogan suggested.  "And...
there are more than three of them and Thristle here.  I can sense several more at the
back of this space."
     "Can't see 'em," Carris said after a moment.  "The light's too dim, and all this
smoke...."  He sneezed.  "Not that I'm doubting you."  Before he could say more,
Thristle's introduction came to an end.
     One of the three lizard men they could see made a gesture.  Thristle stepped
aside, allowing the man to face the gladiators without obstruction.  "The young one
tells me that you are warriors in your own land," he said.  His voice was deep, his
words heavily accented, but clear enough.  "That you wish to return to your own
land."
     The tone of the last sentence made it a question.  "This is true," Carris said.
"It seems that our world is in some ways much like this one, but in others much
different.  And the biggest difference is that this is not...home."
     A sort of whistling sigh ran around the room, every lizard man sharing in it.
     "We understand this distinction," the leader said.  "We also feel it.  If you
will help us to regain our Home, our Great Triliske, which is primarily a matter of
fighting, then we will call upon the priests and power-workers of Great Triliske to
help you to your Home."
     "Seems like a fair deal," Scarlatti muttered quietly.
     "There is more to it than shows," Fizban whispered back.  "Else they would need
no help."
     Carris Fallstar nodded very slightly.  "I see that your men are all warriors,
and Thristle has told us that you are trained to it," he said, "and I wonder what
difference a few more could make."
     The lizard man's head dipped in acknowledgment.  "It is true that we are
fearsome in battle.  But we cannot fight until we have reached the battlefield, and
the way to it lies through a realm of such cold that we would be nearly helpless.  We
know this because we have made the attempt, and nearly half our number died in it.
We need those who can withstand the cold long enough to open the door for us."
     "Presumably after fighting our way TO the door," Carris murmured.  "And in
return for this, you will ask your wizards to open OUR door."
     "That is the bargain we offer you," the big lizard agreed.  "Of course, our
'wizards' cannot serve you until we have fought our way through to Great Triliske,
and your aid in that fighting may also be important, but..." the man spread his hands
in a curiously human gesture, "that is the best we can do--for you AND for
ourselves."
     "It's difficult to be sure with an unfamiliar life form," Rogan said after the
silence had stretched into a full minute, "but I think, if this man is holding
anything back, it is not a critical fact or..." the blind Aruaki hesitated and then
shrugged, "not something of critical importance.  I think he is truly offering the
best deal he can."
     There was no need to consult his companions formally.  Carris could feel that
the humans were in agreement.  Probably it was an aspect of their short lives that
they made up their minds so quickly.  The elf shrugged in his turn.  "We'll take your
deal," he said.  "When do we start?"

The Isle of the Eye, truly Talahya:

     "The Arcanum with respect to the Isle has stabilized for the moment," the wizard
Tanrith reported.  "But I don't know--"
     "I am not interested in what you don't know," Sheila Greywand snapped.  "Tell me
what you do know.  Where are the gladiators who were caught by wandering Gates during
the first flux?  Or don't you know that?"
     "I'm not certain, but indications are that they ended up somewhere in the
Thallian realm.  It is, after all, one of the other universes most closely tied to
ours."
     Sheila's brows snapped together in a truly formidable frown, one that emphasized
the orcish part of her heritage.  "It's HIM, isn't it?  That damned Dwarf is doing
this to me, and I won't stand for it!  I will take him DOWN."
     "Er...shouldn't we see about getting the displaced gladiators back, first?"
     "Nonsense.  A mere half dozen?  They're easily replaced," she snarled.
"Besides, I need to make an example.  After they way gladiators failed to retrieve
the Eyes--"
     "That was not their fault," the old wizard argued.  "Nothing lasts forever--that
is a fundamental law of the multiverse.  The Eyes have reached the end of their
span."
     Sheila fixed him with a hard stare that had a glint of...almost madness.  "I
could have extended them, IF they had been brought to me in time.  Get me the
coordinates for all the Gates that link Ghea with Thallia.  Do it NOW, old man."

                             REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER

     You elder fighters surely remember me.  The younger ones may call me Olaf 
Modeen.  As Desiree would say, "Not my real name."  But it's real enough--that's what 
they put on the paychecks, after all.  I return to HOME GUARD once again!  Somewhat 
reluctantly, because there's a really good party that I'm missing part of to do this.  
Fireworks!  I love the fireworks.  They're so loud, you can do anything under cover 
of fireworks.
     I see we only had thirty fights today.  A lot of you warriors are out partying, 
yes?  If you're not, why not?  It's the thing to do.  It's practically obligatory.  
Ten challenges matches, two of which are TV challenges.  Good for you TVs.  The 
longest fight was nine minutes.  You don't get anything unless you go over that, you 
guys.  An official long fight has two digits.  Or more, of course.  One standby 
fought.  One warrior died, which seems excessive.  It's the YEAR that's supposed to 
die tonight, not a warrior.  Still, maybe that'll serve as a sacrifice for an 
especially good new year?
     Qubit was most avoided by Magick.
     Black Rhino, possibly through making idle boasts, was most challenged.

     BACKLASH (4-4870) (17-10-1,62) of CHAMPIONS fought TORLEC (10-5018) (15-11-2,54) 
of WAR HAWKS.  BACKLASH overpowered TORLEC in a 2 minute one-sided match.  Now, we 
must ask ourselves why this happened.  True, Blacklash is a champion.  But Torlec is 
a war-hawk.  These facts may be taken to cancel each other out, or at least to weigh 
equally.
     MORADOR (2-5089) (17-4-0,55) of RESURRECTION fought SIR VILE (10-4754) (19-20-
0,63) of SIR AGLIO.  MORADOR was overpowered by SIR VILE in a popular 1 minute uneven 
duel.  In this case, the outcome is obviously influenced by the notorious ability of 
those who are Evile to overcome the heroes of the world up until the final desperate 
moment.  Yes, there can be no other explanation.  Well, there IS the greater 
experience, but that is as nothing to one whose heart is pure.  I have that on the 
best authority.
     GAR & BRILL (38-4252) (20-23-0,64) of JUST BECAUSE fought GAMBLE (7-4884) (15-8-
2,69) of INDIFFERENCE.  GAR & BRILL was vanquished by GAMBLE in a 1 minute one-sided 
bout.  No doubt this win was brought about by the well-attested fact that if one goes 
into a battle not caring whether one lives or dies--with indifference, in fact--one 
has an edge.
     LYTA ALEXANDER (65-5021) (15-8-0,87) of AND SO IT BEGINS fought ANGAR (10-4933) 
(19-16-1,84) of WAR HAWKS.  LYTA ALEXANDER handily defeated ANGAR in an exciting 1 
minute bloody uneven bout.  This, no doubt, is a working out of the saying that what 
is well begun is half won.  As you see, Lyta Alexander was the one who begun this, 
and obviously she did it very well.
     TUTANKHAMUN (71-3357) (19-12-0,82) of CARTOUCHE fought SATOSHI KUNO (7-5229) 
(16-9-0,57) of NINJAS.  TUTANKHAMUN demolished SATOSHI KUNO in an action packed 1 
minute one-sided melee.  As to this, I have in my possession a book which attests to 
the unnatural strength of mummies, which is to say, former Egyptian kings, as 
Tutankhamun is.  Daddies, of course, are so much MORE powerful that even the most 
rash of adventurers refuses to tangle with them.
     GROUND POUNDER (74-3058) (14-9-1,52) of INSIGNIFICANCE fought SKI MASK (58-5869) 
(30-52-0,83) of CIRQUE DU MASQUES.  GROUND POUNDER was overpowered by SKI MASK in a 
popular 1 minute one-sided duel.  I think it at least possible that Ground Pounder 
might have done better against the Dueling Duck if he had restrained his natural urge 
to pound on the ground and pounded the duck instead.  But instincts are powerful.
     FOUNTAINS OF WAYNE (98-809) (10-9-4,49) of COLLEGE RADIO fought LETHE (9-4782) 
(28-21-2,80) of BLUE MOON.  FOUNTAINS OF WAYNE overpowered LETHE in a 1 minute one-
sided duel.  Lethe was cursed by her team name, of course.  She can only win "once in 
a blue moon," and I haven't noticed anything particularly blue about the moon lately, 
have you?
     MUMMY (99-853) (10-10-5,83) of IKER'S CORPSES fought QUONSET (10-4990) (21-11-
0,69) of QUBIT.  MUMMY was defeated by QUONSET in a popular 2 minute match.  Another 
Mummy fights, and this one was cruelly betrayed by the little known but absolutely 
true fact that mummies as a class helpless in the face of queues.  By their royal 
nature, they never had to stand in lines, and they can't adapt.  Besides great 
strength, mummies are known for a lack of flexibility.
     PUTZ'N ALONG (60-5437) (26-22-0,100) of JOKA MASHER! fought CASTOR (7-4989) (15-
15-3,63) of ASTRONOMICAL.  PUTZ'N ALONG won victory over CASTOR in a crowd pleasing 2 
minute fray.  Again you see the value of the casual approach, as noted above.  Putz'n 
was in no hurry, hence was at an advantage.
     LIBERTY BELLE (12-5448) (23-25-0,147) of POWERPUFF GIRLS fought MOD COD (55-
2638) (43-73-1,93) of RHYME TYME.  LIBERTY BELLE was viciously subdued by MOD COD in 
a popular 1 minute gruesome match.  Many people don't realize that fish are naturally 
vicious, but it's true.  They're absolutely cold-blooded, you see.
     MIME (2-4966) (22-14-3,130) of HARLEQUINS fought HYSTERIAS (19-4047) (26-27-
3,140) of ANARCHY.  MIME devastated HYSTERIAS in a 1 minute one-sided bout.  This 
shouldn't surprise anyone, as we all know that mimes have remarkable fighting 
ability.  After all, fighters remark on this frequently.
     KOOKABURRA (33-4151) (44-59-2,104) of GIRL SCOUT COOKIES fought IRON-PLATED IRV 
(101-10) (0-0-0,150) of Local Louts.  KOOKABURRA savagely defeated IRON-PLATED IRV in 
a 2 minute bloody conflict.  And a very good thing, too.  Irv has been asking for a 
savage defeat for years, and that it should come at the hands of a Girl Scout seems 
to positively gild the lily.
     W.T. POOH (33-4430) (58-44-0,126) of SNOTZI'S II fought SABLE (2-4950) (26-15-
2,93) of HARLEQUINS.  W.T. POOH savagely defeated SABLE in an exciting 5 minute 
brutal bout.  The savagery and brutality of the bears is well known, of course.  
After all, they're savage brutes by nature.
     DELICE THE RED (56-3401) (39-49-1,115) of BAD APPLES fought JUGGLER (2-4965) 
(23-14-0,105) of HARLEQUINS.  DELICE THE RED viciously subdued JUGGLER in a popular 2 
minute brutal brawl.  This vicious brutality was distinctly unwomanly, and it just 
SHOWS why Delice is a Bad Apple.
     MOJO JOJO (10-4643) (27-27-2,170) of TOWNSVILLAINS fought MISER (71-3793) (36-
17-2,109) of SHADOW GOLD.  MOJO JOJO viciously subdued MISER in an exciting 7 minute 
bloody fray.  And who can wonder at it when our very own defender of fair play and 
free popcorn, the Obsessed Avenger, assures us of the evil nature of Mojo Jojo?  He 
probably heard the rumor that Miser has a treasure of coin hidden away somewhere and 
hoped to worm the location out of his hapless opponent.  I wouldn't put it past him.
     MASHER (60-4553) (36-36-3,167) of JOKA MASHER! fought TICKLES (9-3486) (36-59-
1,106) of MY PETS.  MASHER overpowered TICKLES in a crowd pleasing 1 minute one-sided 
duel.  And this without even a warning "mash-note."  That is in violation of the 
Cad's Code.  Someone will call upon you over this within the week, Masher.
     SPAZZ (33-6207) (38-28-0,185) of SNOTZI'S II fought AVALANCHE (75-2213) (22-4-
1,153) of FORCE OF NATURE.  SPAZZ was beaten by AVALANCHE in a crowd pleasing 1 
minute conflict.  Who would toy with the forces of Nature?  Very unwise, that is.  
Mother Nature has shown herself to have a formidable temper, and less patience than 
you might think.
     DIRT WORM (82-2315) (56-28-0,196) of VERMIN!! fought HALLIE O'DENE (58-6018) 
(44-57-0,158) of CIRQUE DU MASQUES.  DIRT WORM subdued HALLIE O'DENE in a crowd 
pleasing 6 minute match.  So!  Can it be that it is TRUE, as the Obsessed Avenger has 
suggested, that Hallie O'Dene has a secret life as a Villainess?  Why else, after 
all, would the crowd be pleased at her punishment?
     WURP (10-18) (46-52-1,181) of WAR HAWKS fought 50 SUCKS (60-4129) (54-34-0,182) 
of JOKA MASHER!  WURP was bested by 50 SUCKS in a crowd pleasing 2 minute conflict.  
Remember this and speak with respect to your elders, and listen with even greater 
respect, and also attention.  By the older folks drinks, too.  Lots of drinks.  
Yes... I'm older, myself, you know.

     Ah, the challenge matches!  Let's see what you've given us today.
     GLLEELLMANN (11-4514) (26-10-0,90) of CARNIVAL challenged LUNA TYCK (33-5761) 
(32-34-1,95) of DRAKE'S PETTING ZOO.  Up 5.  GLLEELLMANN luckily beat LUNA TYCK in an 
exciting 9 minute gruesome Challenge fight.  WAS Luna Tyck drunk for this match?  DID 
Glleellmann make unfair use of doubling to hit from two directions at once?  Tune in 
next cycle and SEE!
     CIARAN (1-7176) (16-8-1,58) of MANNEQUIN'S BEST challenged DITCH RAT (82-15360) 
(16-17-3,58) of VERMIN!  Straight across.  CIARAN was viciously subdued by DITCH RAT 
in an action packed 1 minute Challenge fight.  You will have heard, I do not doubt, 
of the viciousness of cornered rats.  That is NOTHING compared to the viciousness of 
rats in ditches.  Trust me on this.  I have ways of knowing.
     THREEKARD (47-4600) (16-12-1,78) of CARNIVAL challenged CARRIE NATION (64-4054) 
(38-65-0,89) of REFORMERS.  Up 11.  THREEKARD was vanquished by CARRIE NATION in a 1 
minute uneven Challenge duel.  Never approach Carrie Nation with liquor on your 
breath, Threekard!  Besides, liquor is better in the belly than on the breath.
     KOGITSUNE MARU (1-5298) (21-17-1,59) of SWEORDMASTERS challenged QUIBBLE (10-
4756) (17-37-0,74) of QUBIT.  Up 15.  KOGITSUNE MARU viciously subdued QUIBBLE in a 
popular 3 minute Challenge competition.  Nothing like being master of your sweord 
when it comes time for battle.  It beats out any niggling little objections you might 
expect to see.
     FILI LIU (2-4968) (22-21-0,92) of RESURRECTION challenged IPECAC (45-3625) (16-
8-0,91) of EMETICS.  Down 1.  FILI LIU was overpowered by IPECAC in a 1 minute one-
sided Challenge struggle.  I shudder to think of what the maintenance crew had to say 
when they cleaned up after this battle.  And if you know anything of ipecac, so do 
you!
     NEDIAM NORI (31-4069) (23-14-1,114) of CISUM S. EKARD challenged BEER GOGGLES 
(33-6819) (24-18-1,129) of JOYS OF BOOZE.  Up 15.  NEDIAM NORI bested BEER GOGGLES in 
an action packed 1 minute Challenge brawl.  Which proves, or demonstrates, or however 
you want to say it, that Nediam has will of nori.  Fierce she was in battle, and so 
on.  I don't do epics myself, but I've heard 'em.
     BUBBLES (12-4981) (24-46-1,142) of POWERPUFF GIRLS challenged BLACK RHINO (71-
1834) (38-28-1,170) of EDGE OF EXTINCTION.  Up 28.  BUBBLES devastated BLACK RHINO in 
an exciting 1 minute one-sided Challenge fight.  This is Most Challenged Black Rhino 
the Idle Boaster, according to the notes I've got here.  Nothing like a light-hearted 
Bubble to puncture the pompous.
     STARBUCK (6-5387) (28-18-0,176) of SCIENCE FICTION challenged QRAPPY (10-4761) 
(37-47-1,188) of QUBIT.  Up 12.  STARBUCK savagely defeated QRAPPY in an action 
packed 2 minute bloody Challenge fight.  That swooping through the air stuff--very 
strange.  I'm not sure the coffee-pot approach wouldn't be more, not comforting 
exactly, but more familiar, at least.  Oh, well.

     The TV challenges:  ISHINOMORI (7-5390) (14-6-1,46) of NINJAS TV challenged HIGH 
GUN (15-4386) (15-18-1,42) of TRIPLE CROWN.  Down 4.  ISHINOMORI vanquished HIGH GUN 
in a 1 minute uneven Challenge battle.  Obviously, no Ninja is going to fall off even 
the fiercest bucking bronco.
     TUM (18-7380) (15-12-1,65) of FROM THE FACE TV challenged NUTMEG (7-5167) (16-
12-1,49) of SUGAR AND SPICE.  Down 16.  TUM butchered NUTMEG in a 1 minute mismatched 
Challenge fight.  What cruelty!  What hard-hearted and steel-bladedness!

     And for the title, a random match:  KAIDEN (35-3108) (78-75-2,249) of VIOLENT 
FEMS fought EMERALD DRAGONFLY (60-2586) (65-60-2,196) of MAGICK.  KAIDEN was 
overpowered by EMERALD DRAGONFLY in a 1 minute one-sided Title fight.  Frankly, we're 
glad to see this.  Emerald Dragonfly, whether a real insect or not, writes columns.  
I personally approve of that.  And also of whacking aroudn those dangerous violent 
fems!  Good work, Emerald.

                                        Olaf Modeen

CAPTAIN OF THE GUARD          W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 EMERALD DRAGONFLY 60-2586   66  60  2  211  MAGICK (955)               ARADI

GRAND CHAMPIONS               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 DIRT WORM 82-2315           57  28  0  198  VERMIN!! (1124)            DWES EG
 KAIDEN 35-3108              78  76  2  190  VIOLENT FEMS (972)         MURSKA
 STARBUCK 6-5387             29  18  0  190  SCIENCE FICTION (1152)     TRANSEL
 50 SUCKS 60-4129            55  34  0  188  JOKA MASHER! (833)         ARADI
 WURP 10-18                  46  53  1  184  WAR HAWKS (1026)           KOLACT

GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS       W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 QRAPPY 10-4761              37  48  1  180  QUBIT (1136)               KOLACT
 AVALANCHE 75-2213           23   4  1  180  FORCE OF NATURE (747)      JADE MOUNTAIN
 HALLIE O'DENE 58-6018       44  58  0  173  CIRQUE DU MASQUES (1093)   DELARQ TOR
 MOJO JOJO 10-4643           28  27  2  173  TOWNSVILLAINS (1252)       KOLACT
 BUBBLES 12-4981             25  46  1  172  POWERPUFF GIRLS (1145)     RIZTAB
 SPAZZ 33-6207               38  29  0  169  SNOTZI'S II (813)          NIYTYOLE ISLAND
 MASHER 60-4553              37  36  3  169  JOKA MASHER! (833)         ARADI

GRAND ADEPTS                  W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 BLACK RHINO 71-1834         38  29  1  146  EDGE OF EXTINCTION (973)   KYR'TERR
 MIME 2-4966                 23  14  3  145  HARLEQUINS (1186)          NIANIA
-NED THE JANITOR 66-2973     23  22  0  137  ANDORIAN UNIVERSITY (1123) TARRGIR
 KOOKABURRA 33-4151          45  59  2  133  GIRL SCOUT COOKIES (812)   NIYTYOLE ISLAND
 NEDIAM NORI 31-4069         24  14  1  131  CISUM S. EKARD (1175)      CHIMLEVTAL
 W.T. POOH 33-4430           59  44  0  130  SNOTZI'S II (813)          NIYTYOLE ISLAND
-EMILY 17-5753               26  16  0  128  BLADES OF STEEL (1068)     ALJAFIR
 HYSTERIAS 19-4047           26  28  3  127  ANARCHY (1151)             ZUWAYZA
 MOD COD 55-2638             44  73  1  126  RHYME TYME (449)           KHALANI
 DELICE THE RED 56-3401      40  49  1  125  BAD APPLES (1091)          ROCANIS
 MISER 71-3793               36  18  2  122  SHADOW GOLD (1143)         KYR'TERR
 BEER GOGGLES 33-6819        24  19  1  119  JOYS OF BOOZE (1209)       NIYTYOLE ISLAND
 LIBERTY BELLE 12-5448       23  26  0  115  POWERPUFF GIRLS (1145)     RIZTAB
 TICKLES 9-3486              36  60  1  112  MY PETS (554)              ZUKAL
-CADDY JACKKNIFE 11-4288     22   9  0  110  GERFEL'S FRIENDS (516)     ARUAK CITY
-W.M. DARKHEART 19-1242      29  24  3  109  THE GUARDIANS (176)        ZUWAYZA
-KONGOL 7-4524               31  16  2  104  BLADES OF ICE (162)        BONSUR
 JUGGLER 2-4965              23  15  0  104  HARLEQUINS (1186)          NIANIA
 IPECAC 45-3625              17   8  0  103  EMETICS (1242)             STORMCROWE
 PUTZ'N ALONG 60-5437        27  22  0  102  JOKA MASHER! (833)         ARADI

GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES    W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 GLLEELLMANN 11-4514         27  10  0  100  CARNIVAL (1105)            ARUAK CITY
 SABLE 2-4950                26  16  2  100  HARLEQUINS (1186)          NIANIA
 LYTA ALEXANDER 65-5021      16   8  0  100  AND SO IT BEGINS (1062)    DAL SHANG
 CARRIE NATION 64-4054       39  65  0   98  REFORMERS (1095)           KURUKAR
-THE WALL 21-2660            23  15  1   98  THE GUARDIANS (939)        SUNSET
 LUNA TYCK 33-5761           32  35  1   94  DRAKE'S PETTING ZOO (1075) NIYTYOLE ISLAND
 TUM 18-7380                 16  12  2   94  FROM THE FACE (1265)       TALCAMA
-SPUTTER 82-15095            24  11  1   93  JOKA MASHER (917)          DWES EG
 TUTANKHAMUN 71-3357         20  12  0   91  CARTOUCHE (1111)           KYR'TERR

GRAND INITIATES               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 SKI MASK 58-5869            31  52  0   89  CIRQUE DU MASQUES (1093)   DELARQ TOR
 QUONSET 10-4990             22  11  0   84  QUBIT (1136)               KOLACT
 FILI LIU 2-4968             22  22  0   83  RESURRECTION (1065)        NIANIA
 SIR VILE 10-4754            20  20  0   79  SIR AGLIO (788)            KOLACT
 GAMBLE 7-4884               16   8  2   79  INDIFFERENCE (1250)        BONSUR
 FOUNTAINS OF WAYNE 98-809   11   9  4   79  COLLEGE RADIO (1223)       SYVYN'S HILL
 ANGAR 10-4933               19  17  1   77  WAR HAWKS (1026)           KOLACT
 KOGITSUNE MARU 1-5298       22  17  1   75  SWEORDMASTERS (1210)       MORDANT
 MUMMY 99-853                10  11  5   75  IKER'S CORPSES (1225)      SOUTH RIDGE
 BACKLASH 4-4870             18  10  1   73  CHAMPIONS (930)            JHELUM

GRAND INITIATES               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 THREEKARD 47-4600           16  13  1   71  CARNIVAL (1238)            NORTH FORK
 CASTOR 7-4989               15  16  3   71  ASTRONOMICAL (1264)        BONSUR
 DITCH RAT 82-15360          17  17  3   70  VERMIN! (1267)             DWES EG
-LEGION 2-3340               25  31  0   67  MYTH AND MIGHT (714)       NIANIA
-EXILE 7-4618                21  17  1   66  BLADES OF ICE (162)        BONSUR
 QUIBBLE 10-4756             17  38  0   62  QUBIT (1136)               KOLACT
-VALLISNERIA 30-3226         15   8  1   61  THE GREENHOUSE (1219)      IAYE
 GAR & BRILL 38-4252         20  24  0   57  JUST BECAUSE (1228)        CLIFFHOME
 ISHINOMORI 7-5390           15   6  1   56  NINJAS (1060)              BONSUR
 LETHE 9-4782                28  22  2   55  BLUE MOON (1025)           ZUKAL
 SATOSHI KUNO 7-5229         16  10  0   55  NINJAS (1060)              BONSUR
 CIARAN 1-7176               16   9  1   53  MANNEQUIN'S BEST (1227)    MORDANT
 GROUND POUNDER 74-3058      14  10  1   50  INSIGNIFICANCE (1266)      DAIYLA KIV
 TORLEC 10-5018              15  12  2   49  WAR HAWKS (1026)           KOLACT
 MORADOR 2-5089              17   5  0   47  RESURRECTION (1065)        NIANIA
 NUTMEG 7-5167               16  13  1   44  SUGAR AND SPICE (1231)     BONSUR
 HIGH GUN 15-4386            15  19  1   35  TRIPLE CROWN (990)         MALCORN

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                    W   L  K TEAM NAME              SLAIN BY              TURN
NUTMEG 7-5167              16  13  1 SUGAR AND SPICE 1231   TUM 18-7380            366

                               PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE

The Guard fought with courage and honor in the gate.  Thank the Grey Lady for the
gift of immortality.  The plan looks as if it has worked.  Let us tend and honor
those that fell and those who stood in defiance of the Chaos horde.  We must salute
those who kept our realm safe.  Salute! -- The Icelord

High Lord Bosk -- I salute your Lord Protectors who fought Chaos and defended this
realm. -- The Icelord

Drake -- Like in LOTR, the Riders of Rohan charged the Oliphants, knowing full well
their chances.  They also knew the fate of a world depended on their sacrifice and
courage.  The Lord Protectors who fought in the Gate are worthy of our total respect
and of great honors. -- The Icelord  (great job on the semester in review!)

Overlords -- Perhaps I have misspoken.  If you are not related to the MF, trust me,
my greatness is very much overrated.  If you ARE with the Midnight Foundation, trust
me again, you have yet to experience the wrath of my greatness!  So, which is it? --
Sultan

Drake -- Thanks, as always, for the semester in review.  Truly a neat feature other
arenas lack. -- Sultan, appreciative

Drake -- Right, you are to correct me.  But my version earns more sympathy points. --
Dirt Worm

Hallie O'Dene -- You paint such a pastoral setting, it's hard for me not to dream
that you are with me in it. -- W.T. Pooh, basking

Nutmeg -- Ha!  You thought YOU, a lowly mammal, or perhaps a spice, could defeat ME,
a veritable PRINCE, a HERO among DUCKS?  HA! I say to you, and again HA! HA! -- Ski
Mask, Founder and President Ducks With Swords

Qrappy -- You're such a kidder, aren't you, going around with a name like that? --
Hallie O'Dene

Putz'n Along -- That's not good enough against me.  You must sweep me off my feet. --
Delice the Red
P.S.  And it would help if you were taller.

One a Day -- One what?  One win?  I'm TRYING, dammit. -- Lethe

Andar -- Do you think to FOOL me with those initials?  I KNOW what you have in that
hip flask and why you were taking blows elsewhere to prevent me from striking it! 
These things are REVEALED to me, you know. -- Carrie Nation

Drake -- That was a magnificent effort, thank you. -- Ho-Chan, manager of Cirque du
Masques, Blue Moon, Bad Apples, and so on
P.S.  Have you considered staggering your reports, doing some in the winter and
summer, others in the spring and fall?  It might spread the load and thus not crush
you.  We'd hate to crush you.

Oaf Modeen -- I seized the disgusting bottle from my wretched opponent and smashed it
on his head, drenching him in harsh spirits which prevented infection (their only
virtue). -- Carrie Nation

I will NOT be easy going and don't any of you think that! -- Delice the Red

Luna Tyck -- You call them like the ANNOUNCERS see them?  Have you no faith in your
own eyes?  Have you been seeing pink elephants and green and purple spotted snakes
lately?  Desist from drinking, you worthless wretch! -- Carrie Nation

2 December 2003
ZalCon2, ZalCon Reloaded
Where:  Jhelum, DM 4
When:  February 9th or 23rd, 2003 (TBA when Mail In date set)
How Long:  20 Turns

Restrictions:  Zero FE at start of contest.  Must announce warrior styles by second
arena fight to receive points.  No prize modified warriors.  No entry to July Face,
No TV Challenges.  All prizes to be used exclusively on warriors from the contest
team only.

Awards:
     First Initiate Duelmaster (FID):  First warrior announced in the contest to
          reach the throne.
     Prize:  Limited Damage Potion, increasing damage for 1 warrior by one rating to
          max for ST/SZ.
     Warrior MVP:  Top warrior based on MVP points accrued in the contest.
     Prize:  Limited Damage Potion, Favorites Knowledge for any warrior on team, +1
          to bonus in any skill area up to max for style for 1 warrior on team, 2
          nights stay at Winter FTF Hotel.
     Team MVP:  Top Team based on MVP points accrued in contest by all the teams
          warriors.
     Prize:  Limited Damage Potion, Favorites Knowledge, +1 to Bonus, 6 Months Free
          Play, 20 Rollups.
     Warrior MVP Top 11:  Next 10 warriors on MVP list at the end of the contest.
     Prize:  +1 to Bonus
     Style Master:  Top warrior in each style based on Style Master points accrued in
          the contest.
     Prize:  Favorites Knowledge of any warrior on team.
     Iron Manager Award:  Minimum 95 fights in contest by any team.
     Prize:  Choice of free entry for team to 2005 Winter Face or +1 to Bonus for one
          warrior.

MVP Point System:  +1 for Win, Fight, Kill, Recognition Leader (after Round 3), -1
Death, +2 Duelmaster, +2 each 3 Consecutive turns as DM, +1 Quality Win (any win over
opponent with 5 or more Rec), +1 for each 10 Rec points over 5 in win (+1 for 5-14
above, +2 for 15-24 above, +3 for 25-34 above).
Style Master Point System:  +2 Style Master, +1 Win vs. Same Style Opponent, +1 Win
vs. Same Style Master, +1 for 3 Consecutive Turns as Style Master (rolling).

     Please direct any question about rules or clarifications to me, Robert
Occhipinti, via Diplo to DM74, 1988 Dodgers or email to zalgor@hotmail.com.  All
rules decisions made by me are final and binding within the confines of this contest.

8 December 2003
Greetings!  I would like to invite everyone to Jhans (DM 36) for the first annual kLk
St. Valentine's Day Massacre (kill contest).  We will start the contest off with the
ceremonial burning of the Andorian flag on turn 450.  (Six turns away.  Roughly mid-
February.)  The contest will run for 10 turns.  On turn 461, 3 separate victors will
be announced.  Team with the most kills, warrior with the most kills, and alliance
with the most kills.  Prizes will be awarded to the manager of the team with the most
kills and to the manager of the warrior with the most kills.  The prizes will
probably be team roll-ups.  The number of roll-ups has yet to be determined.  The
contest is sponsored by Jhans' newest, (but by the time the contest starts) largest
alliance, the kLk (pronounced "klick"). -- Polarius, mgr. of Blitzkrieg DM 36

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

TUM butchered NUTMEG in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge fight.
ISHINOMORI vanquished HIGH GUN in a 1 minute uneven Challenge battle.
STARBUCK savagely defeated QRAPPY in a action packed 2 minute bloody Challenge fight.
BUBBLES devastated BLACK RHINO in a exciting 1 minute one-sided Challenge fight.
NEDIAM NORI bested BEER GOGGLES in a action packed 1 minute Challenge brawl.
FILI LIU was overpowered by IPECAC in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge struggle.
KOGITSUNE MARU viciously subdued QUIBBLE in a popular 3 minute Challenge competition.
THREEKARD was vanquished by CARRIE NATION in a 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
CIARAN was viciously subdued by DITCH RAT in a action packed 1 minute Challenge fight.
GLLEELLMANN luckily beat LUNA TYCK in a exciting 9 minute gruesome Challenge fight.
KAIDEN was overpowered by EMERALD DRAGONFLY in a 1 minute one-sided Title fight.
WURP was bested by 50 SUCKS in a crowd pleasing 2 minute conflict.
DIRT WORM subdued HALLIE O'DENE in a crowd pleasing 6 minute match.
SPAZZ was beaten by AVALANCHE in a crowd pleasing 1 minute conflict.
MASHER overpowered TICKLES in a crowd pleasing 1 minute one-sided duel.
MOJO JOJO viciously subdued MISER in a exciting 7 minute bloody fray.
DELICE THE RED viciously subdued JUGGLER in a popular 2 minute brutal brawl.
W.T. POOH savagely defeated SABLE in a exciting 5 minute brutal bout.
KOOKABURRA savagely defeated IRON-PLATED IRV in a 2 minute bloody conflict.
MIME devastated HYSTERIAS in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
LIBERTY BELLE was viciously subdued by MOD COD in a popular 1 minute gruesome match.
PUTZ'N ALONG won victory over CASTOR in a crowd pleasing 2 minute fray.
MUMMY was defeated by QUONSET in a popular 2 minute match.
FOUNTAINS OF WAYNE overpowered LETHE in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
GROUND POUNDER was overpowered by SKI MASK in a popular 1 minute one-sided duel.
TUTANKHAMUN demolished SATOSHI KUNO in a action packed 1 minute one-sided melee.
LYTA ALEXANDER handily defeated ANGAR in a exciting 1 minute bloody uneven bout.
GAR & BRILL was vanquished by GAMBLE in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
MORADOR was overpowered by SIR VILE in a popular 1 minute uneven duel.
BACKLASH overpowered TORLEC in a 2 minute one-sided match.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                  18         PARRY-LUNGE       26 -  16 -  2      62  |
|BASHING ATTACK                  10         PARRY-STRIKE      23 -  18 -  0      56  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  8         TOTAL PARRY       44 -  35 -  0      56  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    8         LUNGING ATTACK   118 - 110 -  2      52  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      5         AIMED BLOW        25 -  24 -  0      51  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  5         WALL OF STEEL     68 -  67 -  0      50  |
|AIMED BLOW                       3         SLASHING ATTACK   23 -  23 -  0      50  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    1         BASHING ATTACK    49 -  52 -  2      49  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      1         STRIKING ATTACK   53 -  67 -  2      44  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     0         PARRY-RIPOSTE      6 -  14 -  0      30  |

Turn 366 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -  0     WALL OF STEEL      1 -  7         3  LUNGING ATTACK 
TOTAL PARRY        4 -  1     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  1         3  STRIKING ATTACK
AIMED BLOW         2 -  1     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  0         2  WALL OF STEEL  
SLASHING ATTACK    3 -  2                                       1  SLASHING ATTACK
BASHING ATTACK     6 -  4                                       1  TOTAL PARRY    
LUNGING ATTACK     9 -  9                                       1  AIMED BLOW     
STRIKING ATTACK    4 -  4     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
SLASHING ATTACK  EMERALD DRAGONFLY 60-2586  66  60  2  211 MAGICK (955)
TOTAL PARRY      DIRT WORM 82-2315          57  28  0  198 VERMIN!! (1124)
LUNGING ATTACK   KAIDEN 35-3108             78  76  2  190 VIOLENT FEMS (972)
WALL OF STEEL    50 SUCKS 60-4129           55  34  0  188 JOKA MASHER! (833)
STRIKING ATTACK  WURP 10-18                 46  53  1  184 WAR HAWKS (1026)
AIMED BLOW       HALLIE O'DENE 58-6018      44  58  0  173 CIRQUE DU MASQUES (1093)
BASHING ATTACK   SPAZZ 33-6207              38  29  0  169 SNOTZI'S II (813)
PARRY-LUNGE      LUNA TYCK 33-5761          32  35  1   94 DRAKE'S PETTING ZOO (1075)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    BACKLASH 4-4870            18  10  1   73 CHAMPIONS (930)

The overall popularity leader is KAIDEN 35-3108.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was MOJO JOJO 10-4643.  The ten other most popular fighters were HALLIE O'DENE 
58-6018, LUNA TYCK 33-5761, DELICE THE RED 56-3401, KOGITSUNE MARU 1-5298, STARBUCK 
6-5387, GLLEELLMANN 11-4514, SABLE 2-4950, WURP 10-18, DIRT WORM 82-2315, and DITCH 
RAT 82-15360.

The least popular fighter this week was GAR & BRILL 38-4252.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were GROUND POUNDER 74-3058, LETHE 9-4782, HYSTERIAS 19-4047, FILI 
LIU 2-4968, HIGH GUN 15-4386, NUTMEG 7-5167, ANGAR 10-4933, SATOSHI KUNO 7-5229, 
LIBERTY BELLE 12-5448, and KAIDEN 35-3108.

Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  
MORDANT(1)           1  1 0  TALCAMA(18)          1  0 1  DELARQ TOR(58)       1  1 0  
NIANIA(2)            1  4 0  ZUWAYZA(19)          0  1 0  ARADI(60)            4  0 0  
JHELUM(4)            1  0 0  CHIMLEVTAL(31)       1  0 0  KURUKAR(64)          1  0 0  
TRANSEL(6)           1  0 0  NIYTYOLE ISLAND(33)  2  3 0  DAL SHANG(65)        1  0 0  
BONSUR(7)            2  3 0  MURSKA(35)           0  1 0  KYR'TERR(71)         1  2 0  
ZUKAL(9)             0  2 0  CLIFFHOME(38)        0  1 0  DAIYLA KIV(74)       0  1 0  
KOLACT(10)           3  5 0  STORMCROWE(45)       1  0 0  JADE MOUNTAIN(75)    1  0 0  
ARUAK CITY(11)       1  0 0  NORTH FORK(47)       0  1 0  DWES EG(82)          2  0 0  
RIZTAB(12)           1  1 0  KHALANI(55)          1  0 0  SYVYN'S HILL(98)     1  0 0  
MALCORN(15)          0  1 0  ROCANIS(56)          1  0 0  SOUTH RIDGE(99)      0  1 0  

TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 KOGITSUNE MARU 1-5298       22  17  1   75  SWEORDMASTERS (1210)       MORDANT
 MIME 2-4966                 23  14  3  145  HARLEQUINS (1186)          NIANIA
 BACKLASH 4-4870             18  10  1   73  CHAMPIONS (930)            JHELUM
 STARBUCK 6-5387             29  18  0  190  SCIENCE FICTION (1152)     TRANSEL
 GAMBLE 7-4884               16   8  2   79  INDIFFERENCE (1250)        BONSUR
 TICKLES 9-3486              36  60  1  112  MY PETS (554)              ZUKAL
 WURP 10-18                  46  53  1  184  WAR HAWKS (1026)           KOLACT
 GLLEELLMANN 11-4514         27  10  0  100  CARNIVAL (1105)            ARUAK CITY
 BUBBLES 12-4981             25  46  1  172  POWERPUFF GIRLS (1145)     RIZTAB
 HIGH GUN 15-4386            15  19  1   35  TRIPLE CROWN (990)         MALCORN
 TUM 18-7380                 16  12  2   94  FROM THE FACE (1265)       TALCAMA
 HYSTERIAS 19-4047           26  28  3  127  ANARCHY (1151)             ZUWAYZA
 NEDIAM NORI 31-4069         24  14  1  131  CISUM S. EKARD (1175)      CHIMLEVTAL
 SPAZZ 33-6207               38  29  0  169  SNOTZI'S II (813)          NIYTYOLE ISLAND
 KAIDEN 35-3108              78  76  2  190  VIOLENT FEMS (972)         MURSKA
 GAR & BRILL 38-4252         20  24  0   57  JUST BECAUSE (1228)        CLIFFHOME
 IPECAC 45-3625              17   8  0  103  EMETICS (1242)             STORMCROWE
 THREEKARD 47-4600           16  13  1   71  CARNIVAL (1238)            NORTH FORK
 MOD COD 55-2638             44  73  1  126  RHYME TYME (449)           KHALANI
 DELICE THE RED 56-3401      40  49  1  125  BAD APPLES (1091)          ROCANIS
 HALLIE O'DENE 58-6018       44  58  0  173  CIRQUE DU MASQUES (1093)   DELARQ TOR
 EMERALD DRAGONFLY 60-2586   66  60  2  211  MAGICK (955)               ARADI
 CARRIE NATION 64-4054       39  65  0   98  REFORMERS (1095)           KURUKAR
 LYTA ALEXANDER 65-5021      16   8  0  100  AND SO IT BEGINS (1062)    DAL SHANG
 BLACK RHINO 71-1834         38  29  1  146  EDGE OF EXTINCTION (973)   KYR'TERR
 GROUND POUNDER 74-3058      14  10  1   50  INSIGNIFICANCE (1266)      DAIYLA KIV
 AVALANCHE 75-2213           23   4  1  180  FORCE OF NATURE (747)      JADE MOUNTAIN
 DIRT WORM 82-2315           57  28  0  198  VERMIN!! (1124)            DWES EG
 FOUNTAINS OF WAYNE 98-809   11   9  4   79  COLLEGE RADIO (1223)       SYVYN'S HILL
 MUMMY 99-853                10  11  5   75  IKER'S CORPSES (1225)      SOUTH RIDGE

                       TOURNEY FREEZE CHANGE -- ADVANCE NOTICE

     Beginning at the Winter Face-to-Face in Tempe (January 2004), we will implement 
several changes affecting tournaments.  The tournament announcement for the upcoming 
FTF and future tourneys will reflect these changes.
     First, we will eliminate the tourney freeze for all regular DM warrior classes.  
Regular DM warriors will not be classed ahead of the tournament, but instead will 
fight according to their FE on the date of the tourney.  There will still be a freeze 
for the ADM classes, occurring on the same timeline as before, approximately 6 weeks 
before the tournament.
     In addition to the above change, the warrior classes will be slightly altered.  
The new tourney classes will be as follows:

                DM Tourney Classes                 ADM Tourney Classes
              ======================              ======================
                  0 FE:  Rookies                        Freshmen
                1-4 FE:  Apprentices                    ADM
               5-10 FE:  Initiates                      Eligibles
              11-20 FE:  Adepts                      ---induction---
              21-30 FE:  Champions                      Contenders
                31+ FE:  Challengers                    Primus

     All regular DM tourney classes will remain solely FE based.  All ADM classes will 
now be based on warrior characteristics (i.e., the ADM split algorithm), including the 
Freshmen class.
     The Gateway and Primus arenas will be merging before the FTF to form one top 
arena.  These warriors will be split into two tournament classes, the Contenders and 
the Primus classes, again based upon their characteristics.  More information on this 
will be published in the newsletters for those arenas.
     If you have any questions about the above changes, please contact Customer 
Service.  Good luck in your games.

                                          -- Green Eyes and the RSI staff