ADVANCED DUELMASTERS

Date   : 01/28/2004    Duedate: 02/10/2004

HOME GUARD

DM-101    TURN-368

RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %  RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %
  1 COLLEGE RADI 98/1223  116   63  0 64.8      BUMS 'R' US 60/1142                   
  2-CHAMPIONS 4/930       373  243  1 60.6   10-CISUM S. EKA 31/1175  155  168  5 48.0
    SHADOW GOLD 71/1143                         DRAKE'S BAR-B-Q 15/313                
  3 4-LETTER ANX 82/1271  238  178  1 57.2      DRAKE'S PETTING ZOO 33/1075           
    ORGAN ON THE SANDS 96/1272               11 NINJAS 7/1060         154  178  1 46.4
    ORGANS ON THE SAND 97/1273                  FROM THE FACE 18/1265                 
    WOMEN LOVE ME FOR MY 82/1274                SCIENCE FICTION 6/1152                
  4 MAGICK 60/955         486  398  4 55.0      RESURRECTION 2/1065                   
    AND SO IT BEGINS 65/1062                 12-CARNIVAL 11/1105       48   58  0 45.3
    FORCE OF NATURE 75/747                      CARNIVAL 47/1238                      
    ALL THAT SLITHERS 65/1176                13 VIOLENT FEMS 35/972   380  507  9 42.8
    CARTOUCHE 71/1111                           JUST BECAUSE 38/1228                  
    EDGE OF EXTINCTION 71/973                14 HARLEQUINS 2/1186      64   98  2 39.5
  5 QUBIT 10/1136         688  565  4 54.9      WAR HAWKS 10/1026                     
    VERMIN!! 82/1124                            ASTRONOMICAL 7/1264                   
    JOKA MASHER! 60/833                      15 MY PETS 9/554         442  708 11 38.4
    TRIPLE CROWN 15/990                         GIRL SCOUT COOKIES 33/812             
    SIR AGLIO 10/788                            RHYME TYME 55/449                     
    VERMIN! 82/1267                          16 BLUE MOON 9/1025      412  701  3 37.0
    SNOTZI'S II 33/813                          BAD APPLES 56/1091                    
  6 ANARCHY 19/1151        19   18  0 51.4      REFORMERS 64/1095                     
    INDIFFERENCE 7/1250                         CIRQUE DU MASQUES 58/1093             
    INSIGNIFICANCE 74/1266                   17-SUPERIOR KIL 98/1229   10   17  1 37.0
  7 SWEORDMASTERS 1/1210   45   44  0 50.6      SHAO-LIN HEROES 14/1253               
    SUGAR AND SPICE 7/1231                   18 TOWNSVILLAIN 10/1252   17   32  0 34.7
    MANNEQUIN'S BEST 1/1227                     POWERPUFF GIRLS 12/1145               
    BATHTUB ARMADA 7/1196                    19-U.B.O.S.M. 11/1184     24   48  1 33.3
  8 OVERLORDS 20/30       114  118  1 49.1   20 MY DRUGS 98/1222        9   21  0 30.0
    THE STORMGUARDS 31/132                   21-IKER'S CORPS 99/1225    3    8  0 27.3
  9 EMETICS 45/1242        33   35  0 48.5   22 AMERICAN APPR 3/1268    0    1  0  0.0
    JOYS OF BOOZE 33/1209                 

    '##/###' Avoid teams by their Team Id     '-'  Team did not fight this turn

                                 THE GUARDIAN'S FORUM
                       Reflections by the Captain of the Guard

Hello, Home Guard!

What a weird turn this has been!  First, I fight someone named Sumthing Painful for
the throne.  Ok, that's not weird, but what is odd is that he and his entire team
disappeared right after the fight.  Ok, maybe not right after, and no they didn't
like, become invisible, but they did disappear from the arena rankings.  Very rude, I
think, to just, you know, fight and run like that.

Then, I didn't even have time to celebrate my victory (and that is my favorite part),
before Poison Ivy shows up to whisk me and Lyta away to the tournament.  Not that I
didn't want to go, but geez, she wouldn't even let me have a glass of champagne
before we left!  That's just WRONG, ya know?

Anyway, the tourney was fun, and Lyta and I did both TV, so I guess all's well that
ends well.  :-)

Emerald Dragonfly
Captain of the Guard

                             REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER

     Here we are again, and I want to know why.  Why us, why here, why fighting.  It 
isn't like this is something NEW.  Of course, not everyone wants new....  Or maybe 
it's just that I need a drink.  Yeah, I bet that's it.  And none of this "mulled 
wine" stuff with sugar and spices in it!  Yuck!  A REAL drink isn't PRETTY.  No 
fruit, no cinnamon sticks, and NO UMBRELLA.  You know, I went into the Basn N' Glug 
yesterday for a beer, and they put an umbrella in it?  Gods.

     Powerpuff Girls avoided Rhyme Tyme.
     Ishinomori was most challenged.
     We had thirty-three fights, of which nine were challenge matches (one tv 
challenge).  Three standbys fought.
     Nobody died.
     Two miserable little five-minute fights tied for longest.  That's insulting.

     JAKUCHU ITO (7-5102) (18-12-0,66) of NINJAS fought KOGITSUNE MARU (1-5298) (22-
18-1,71) of SWEORDMASTERS.  JAKUCHU ITO was devastated by KOGITSUNE MARU in a 1 
minute one-sided battle.  They seemed like a well-matched pair to me.  Both 
foreigners.  Probably Adantri, even if they did train Delarquan.
     HIGH GUN (15-4386) (15-20-1,44) of TRIPLE CROWN fought CIARAN (1-7176) (16-10-
1,47) of MANNEQUIN'S BEST.  HIGH GUN was handily defeated by CIARAN in an action 
packed 2 minute mismatched match.  Well, naturally.  After all, it says right there 
that Ciaran is Mannequin's BEST.
     LYTA ALEXANDER (65-5021) (16-9-0,77) of AND SO IT BEGINS fought LAKE SAILOR 
(101-2) (0-0-0,30) of Local Louts.  LYTA ALEXANDER overpowered LAKE SAILOR in a 
popular 1 minute one-sided bout.  I would strongly advise Lyta to stay away from the 
lake for a while.  The sailors really ARE louts, you see, and they don't take kindly 
to losing.  Well, nobody takes kindly to losing, when you come right down to it.
     CREDIT LINE (82-1366) (0-0-0,0) of WOMEN LOVE ME FOR MY fought GAR & BRILL (38-
4252) (20-25-0,50) of JUST BECAUSE.  CREDIT LINE was subdued by GAR & BRILL in a 1 
minute fight.  Does this mean women love him for his gar and brill?  Or "just 
because."  Sounds like a wife, or maybe a mother, that does.  "Just because."  Hmphf.  
I've heard THAT before.
     FEAR (82-10416) (13-23-1,63) of 4-LETTER ANXIETY fought CORAL SNAKE (65-5017) 
(14-8-0,50) of ALL THAT SLITHERS.  FEAR was handily defeated by CORAL SNAKE in a 1 
minute one-sided fight.  Is this a case of there being "nothing to Fear"?  Or is 
Coral Snake just even MORE fearsome?  Besides being prettier, of course.

     KIDNEY (96-972) (8-2-3,29) of ORGAN ON THE SANDS fought MARY RETZLAFF (3-6119) 
(16-20-1,69) of AMERICAN APPRAISAL.  KIDNEY overpowered MARY RETZLAFF in a 2 minute 
gruesome one-sided fight.  I know a joke that applies to this, but I think you had to 
be there.  How'd a guy make it out of the Bloodgames and onto the Isle with only 
three kills?
     HEART (97-1096) (6-4-4,26) of ORGANS ON THE SAND fought QUIBBLE (10-4756) (18-
38-0,77) of QUBIT.  HEART was overcome by QUIBBLE in an action packed 1 minute 
mismatched bout.  Now, this is the kind of thing you see a lot of.  'Specially around 
the law courts.
     FOUNTAINS OF WAYNE (98-809) (11-10-4,69) of COLLEGE RADIO fought DITCH RAT (82-
15360) (18-17-3,78) of VERMIN!  FOUNTAINS OF WAYNE was vanquished by DITCH RAT in a 1 
minute one-sided fray.  Yeah, well, you know how it is with rats.  They're probably 
going to inherit the earth.  Eventually.
     IPECAC (45-3625) (17-9-0,100) of EMETICS fought RAISON D'ETRE (7-5311) (16-14-
3,65) of BATHTUB ARMADA.  IPECAC overpowered RAISON D'ETRE in an exciting 1 minute 
uneven match.  Does this mean that Ipecac is without a reasoned ontological 
foundation?  Horrors!  Or do we get really deep and look for something cosmogonic?
     KOOKABURRA (33-4151) (45-60-2,119) of GIRL SCOUT COOKIES fought GAMBLE (7-4884) 
(17-8-2,99) of INDIFFERENCE.  KOOKABURRA was overpowered by GAMBLE in a popular 1 
minute uneven fight.  It's the season, is what it is.  Everybody's gobbling up these 
cookies.

     W.T. POOH (33-4430) (60-44-0,134) of SNOTZI'S II fought TUM (18-7380) (17-12-
2,103) of FROM THE FACE.  W.T. POOH subdued TUM in a popular 5 minute gruesome fight.  
Five minutes of grue!  W.T. really has something or other to pull out that one.  I 
salute him various salutes.
     BEER GOGGLES (33-6819) (24-20-1,119) of JOYS OF BOOZE fought TICKLES (9-3486) 
(37-60-1,123) of MY PETS.  BEER GOGGLES handily defeated TICKLES in a 1 minute one-
sided contest.  You ever try to get a cat drunk?  I knew I guy always tried to get 
his cat stoned.  The cats don't like it.  Stubborn beasts.
     AVALANCHE (75-2213) (23-5-1,143) of FORCE OF NATURE fought HYSTERIAS (19-4047) 
(27-28-3,129) of ANARCHY.  AVALANCHE demolished HYSTERIAS in an action packed 1 
minute uneven bout.  Now, let's be sure I've got this straight: avalanches are snow, 
and landslides are dirt and rocks, right?  Then if it's snow, all Hysterias has to do 
is wait for it to melt, right?  Easy.  Just hold your breath for a couple of months 
and you're home free.
     TUTANKHAMUN (71-3357) (21-12-0,111) of CARTOUCHE fought SKI MASK (58-5869) (32-
52-0,91) of CIRQUE DU MASQUES.  TUTANKHAMUN devastated SKI MASK in a popular 1 minute 
gruesome one-sided contest.  I saw a mural once showing Tut shooting ducks with a bow 
and arrow.  Guess he does okay with a sword, too.
     PUTZ'N ALONG (60-5437) (28-22-0,108) of JOKA MASHER! fought CARRIE NATION (64-
4054) (39-66-0,97) of REFORMERS.  PUTZ'N ALONG was savagely defeated by CARRIE NATION 
in a popular 3 minute match.  That's the trouble with just doodling along, Putz.  
Carrie can out-run you.  And that is one mean woman!  She got loose in the Bash N' 
Glug last week and, well, I don't like to even think about how much damage she did.

     QRAPPY (10-4761) (37-49-1,180) of QUBIT fought BUDDERCUP (60-5967) (28-25-0,122) 
of BUMS 'R' US.  QRAPPY overpowered BUDDERCUP in a 2 minute brutal one-sided bout.  
So how long are we going to let the Q guy get away with calling himself low quality?  
Seems like he's headed for a winning record, and anyone with a winning record on the 
Isle is the right stuff.
     MOD COD (55-2638) (45-73-1,174) of RHYME TYME fought DELICE THE RED (56-3401) 
(41-49-1,140) of BAD APPLES.  MOD COD was overpowered by DELICE THE RED in a 1 minute 
mismatched brawl.  Now, there's a woman who has OPINIONS about fish.
     BLACK RHINO (71-1834) (39-29-1,152) of EDGE OF EXTINCTION fought JUGGLER (2-
4965) (24-15-0,108) of HARLEQUINS.  BLACK RHINO lost to JUGGLER in a 2 minute fray.  
Which puts the Rhino that much closer to extinction.  Life is tough in an 
evolutionary dead end.
     KAIDEN (35-3108) (79-76-2,192) of VIOLENT FEMS fought WURP (10-18) (46-54-1,177) 
of WAR HAWKS.  KAIDEN was handily defeated by WURP in a popular 1 minute bloody 
uneven fight.  I don't get it.  Some days Kaiden's mean and nasty and every bit as 
violent as her team name, and then next time she's a pussycat.
     STARBUCK (6-5387) (30-18-0,195) of SCIENCE FICTION fought KRAC D'CHEVALIERS (31-
4345) (18-19-0,152) of THE STORMGUARDS.  STARBUCK devastated KRAC D'CHEVALIERS in a 2 
minute mismatched bout.  This is "Starbuck flying through the air," not "Starbuck 
serving coffee," right?  Obviously he flies through the air with the greatest of 
ease.

     ONE A DAY (98-799) (15-11-3,181) of MY DRUGS fought SPAZZ (33-6207) (39-29-
0,185) of SNOTZI'S II.  ONE A DAY slimly won victory over SPAZZ in an exciting 4 
minute brutal contest.  Good thing there weren't Two (take two, they're small?), if 
One a Day is this devastating.
     R'SHANN (20-577) (51-38-3,539) of OVERLORDS fought ARENAMASTER AZEEM (101-28) 
(0-0-0,200) of Local Louts.  R'SHANN was subdued by ARENAMASTER AZEEM in a crowd 
pleasing 4 minute match.  Every once in a while, the arenamasters on the Isle think 
they've got to show their stuff, hold up the standards of the Guild of Arenamasters, 
and so on.  It was just R'Shann's tough luck to draw Azeem at the critical instant.
     TALOS (31-2069) (47-22-0,475) of THE STORMGUARDS fought NAIHREN (101-27) (0-0-
0,240) of Local Louts.  TALOS was handily defeated by NAIHREN in a 1 minute one-sided 
bout.  They tell me these inflated rankings are in recognition of those gladiators 
who volunteered to enter the Gate for the final battle.  I salute 'em for it.

     The challenge matches--
     ANGAR (10-4933) (20-17-1,89) of WAR HAWKS challenged QUONSET (10-4990) (22-12-
0,73) of QUBIT.  Down 16.  ANGAR overpowered QUONSET in a 1 minute uneven Challenge 
duel.  This seemed to involve a lot of shouting.  You know, "hut one, hut two."  It's 
some kind of secret code, I think.
     MORADOR (2-5089) (17-6-0,41) of RESURRECTION challenged SIR VILE (10-4754) (21-
20-1,97) of SIR AGLIO.  Up 56.  MORADOR was vanquished by SIR VILE in an action 
packed 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.  A bold challenge.  Lots of skills learned, I 
hope.
     NUTMEG (7-5167) (17-13-1,58) of SUGAR AND SPICE challenged SATOSHI KUNO (7-5229) 
(17-10-0,88) of NINJAS.  Up 30.  NUTMEG viciously subdued SATOSHI KUNO in a popular 2 
minute Challenge competition.  Huh, they told me that nutmeg is calming.  Sure didn't 
look like it!
     SABLE (2-4950) (26-17-2,95) of HARLEQUINS challenged GROUND POUNDER (74-3058) 
(14-11-1,52) of INSIGNIFICANCE.  Down 43.  SABLE bested GROUND POUNDER in a 2 minute 
Challenge match.  There are times when you have to stop pounding on the ground and 
pound on your opponent.  He who pounds his opponent the most wins the fight.  Of 
course, if you're battle with the ground....
     LIBERTY BELLE (12-5448) (23-27-0,121) of POWERPUFF GIRLS challenged HALLIE 
O'DENE (58-6018) (44-59-0,152) of CIRQUE DU MASQUES.  Up 31.  LIBERTY BELLE slimly 
lost to HALLIE O'DENE in a popular 2 minute Challenge duel.  Good try, Belle, but 
experience does make a difference.

     BUBBLES (12-4981) (25-47-1,180) of POWERPUFF GIRLS challenged 50 SUCKS (60-4129) 
(56-34-0,197) of JOKA MASHER!  Up 17.  BUBBLES was defeated by 50 SUCKS in a crowd 
pleasing 2 minute Challenge match.  This is why women don't like to turn fifty.  And 
who can blame them?
     MOJO JOJO (10-4643) (29-27-2,180) of TOWNSVILLAINS challenged MASHER (60-4553) 
(38-36-3,183) of JOKA MASHER!  Up 3.  MOJO JOJO was overpowered by MASHER in a 1 
minute mismatched Challenge duel.  Messy, very messy.  Mashed Jojo....
     MIME (2-4966) (24-14-4,180) of HARLEQUINS challenged DIRT WORM (82-2315) (58-28-
0,200) of VERMIN!!  Up 20.  MIME was subdued by DIRT WORM in an exciting 5 minute 
Challenge Title melee.  Our other longest fight.  I'm kinda sorry to see Mime take 
that loss, because he's such an important figure in the gladiatorial life.  He's the 
one everyone talks about when they say, "I've seen mimes pretend to fight better than 
you do."  But, of course, if you're only pretending....  It must be hard to overcome 
the mime-school training, right?

     ISHINOMORI (7-5390) (16-6-1,72) of NINJAS TV challenged LETHE (9-4782) (28-23-
2,52) of BLUE MOON.  Down 20.  ISHINOMORI devastated LETHE in an action packed 1 
minute mismatched Challenge fight.  Our only TV challenge today, although there are 
indications that we might see more next time.

     And for the title of Captain of the Guard, a random match.
     EMERALD DRAGONFLY (60-2586) (67-60-2,221) of MAGICK fought CRUSADER LORD (31-
3946) (37-27-4,388) of THE STORMGUARDS.  EMERALD DRAGONFLY was overpowered by 
CRUSADER LORD in a 1 minute one-sided fight.  Well, if quickly, fought, and 
congratulations to both of you.

                                        Olaf Modeen

CAPTAIN OF THE GUARD          W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 DIRT WORM 82-2315           59  28  0  208  VERMIN!! (1124)            DWES EG

GRAND CHAMPIONS               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 50 SUCKS 60-4129            57  34  0  199  JOKA MASHER! (833)         ARADI
 WURP 10-18                  47  54  1  198  WAR HAWKS (1026)           KOLACT
 STARBUCK 6-5387             31  18  0  197  SCIENCE FICTION (1152)     TRANSEL
 MASHER 60-4553              39  36  3  194  JOKA MASHER! (833)         ARADI

GRAND CHAMPIONS               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 EMERALD DRAGONFLY 60-2586   67  61  2  193  MAGICK (955)               ARADI
 SPAZZ 33-6207               39  30  0  182  SNOTZI'S II (813)          NIYTYOLE ISLAND
 QRAPPY 10-4761              38  49  1  182  QUBIT (1136)               KOLACT

GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS       W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 BUBBLES 12-4981             25  48  1  180  POWERPUFF GIRLS (1145)     RIZTAB
 MIME 2-4966                 24  15  4  180  HARLEQUINS (1186)          NIANIA
 KAIDEN 35-3108              79  77  2  174  VIOLENT FEMS (972)         MURSKA
 MOJO JOJO 10-4643           29  28  2  172  TOWNSVILLAINS (1252)       KOLACT
 DELICE THE RED 56-3401      42  49  1  168  BAD APPLES (1091)          ROCANIS
 HALLIE O'DENE 58-6018       45  59  0  154  CIRQUE DU MASQUES (1093)   DELARQ TOR

GRAND ADEPTS                  W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 AVALANCHE 75-2213           24   5  1  150  FORCE OF NATURE (747)      JADE MOUNTAIN
 MOD COD 55-2638             45  74  1  147  RHYME TYME (449)           KHALANI
 JUGGLER 2-4965              25  15  0  141  HARLEQUINS (1186)          NIANIA
 W.T. POOH 33-4430           61  44  0  137  SNOTZI'S II (813)          NIYTYOLE ISLAND
 BEER GOGGLES 33-6819        25  20  1  132  JOYS OF BOOZE (1209)       NIYTYOLE ISLAND
-NEDIAM NORI 31-4069         24  14  1  131  CISUM S. EKARD (1175)      CHIMLEVTAL
 BLACK RHINO 71-1834         39  30  1  129  EDGE OF EXTINCTION (973)   KYR'TERR
 HYSTERIAS 19-4047           27  29  3  128  ANARCHY (1151)             ZUWAYZA
 BUDDERCUP 60-5967           28  26  0  127  BUMS 'R' US (1142)         ARADI
 LIBERTY BELLE 12-5448       23  28  0  125  POWERPUFF GIRLS (1145)     RIZTAB
-MISER 71-3793               36  18  2  122  SHADOW GOLD (1143)         KYR'TERR
 GAMBLE 7-4884               18   8  2  122  INDIFFERENCE (1250)        BONSUR
 TUTANKHAMUN 71-3357         22  12  0  117  CARTOUCHE (1111)           KYR'TERR
 CARRIE NATION 64-4054       40  66  0  114  REFORMERS (1095)           KURUKAR
 TUM 18-7380                 17  13  2  113  FROM THE FACE (1265)       TALCAMA
 TICKLES 9-3486              37  61  1  112  MY PETS (554)              ZUKAL
 KOOKABURRA 33-4151          45  61  2  103  GIRL SCOUT COOKIES (812)   NIYTYOLE ISLAND
 IPECAC 45-3625              18   9  0  103  EMETICS (1242)             STORMCROWE

GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES    W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
-GLLEELLMANN 11-4514         27  10  0  100  CARNIVAL (1105)            ARUAK CITY
 SIR VILE 10-4754            22  20  1  100  SIR AGLIO (788)            KOLACT
 ANGAR 10-4933               21  17  1  100  WAR HAWKS (1026)           KOLACT
 PUTZ'N ALONG 60-5437        28  23  0   97  JOKA MASHER! (833)         ARADI
 SABLE 2-4950                27  17  2   97  HARLEQUINS (1186)          NIANIA
-LUNA TYCK 33-5761           32  35  1   94  DRAKE'S PETTING ZOO (1075) NIYTYOLE ISLAND

GRAND INITIATES               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 SKI MASK 58-5869            32  53  0   89  CIRQUE DU MASQUES (1093)   DELARQ TOR
-FILI LIU 2-4968             23  22  0   89  RESURRECTION (1065)        NIANIA
 DITCH RAT 82-15360          19  17  3   87  VERMIN! (1267)             DWES EG
 NUTMEG 7-5167               18  13  1   85  SUGAR AND SPICE (1231)     BONSUR
 KOGITSUNE MARU 1-5298       23  18  1   84  SWEORDMASTERS (1210)       MORDANT
 ISHINOMORI 7-5390           17   6  1   81  NINJAS (1060)              BONSUR
 QUIBBLE 10-4756             19  38  0   79  QUBIT (1136)               KOLACT
 LYTA ALEXANDER 65-5021      17   9  0   79  AND SO IT BEGINS (1062)    DAL SHANG
-MUMMY 99-853                10  11  5   75  IKER'S CORPSES (1225)      SOUTH RIDGE
-BACKLASH 4-4870             18  10  1   73  CHAMPIONS (930)            JHELUM
-THREEKARD 47-4600           16  13  1   71  CARNIVAL (1238)            NORTH FORK
-CASTOR 7-4989               15  16  3   71  ASTRONOMICAL (1264)        BONSUR
 SATOSHI KUNO 7-5229         17  11  0   69  NINJAS (1060)              BONSUR
 QUONSET 10-4990             22  13  0   68  QUBIT (1136)               KOLACT
 CORAL SNAKE 65-5017         15   8  0   67  ALL THAT SLITHERS (1176)   DAL SHANG
 RAISON D'ETRE 7-5311        16  15  3   66  BATHTUB ARMADA (1196)      BONSUR
 GROUND POUNDER 74-3058      14  12  1   62  INSIGNIFICANCE (1266)      DAIYLA KIV
 FOUNTAINS OF WAYNE 98-809   11  11  4   62  COLLEGE RADIO (1223)       SYVYN'S HILL
 KIDNEY 96-972                9   2  3   60  ORGAN ON THE SANDS (1272)  OLD VALAMANTIS
 CIARAN 1-7176               17  10  1   59  MANNEQUIN'S BEST (1227)    MORDANT
 JAKUCHU ITO 7-5102          18  13  0   58  NINJAS (1060)              BONSUR
-BIG RED 2-5080              16   5  0   53  BIG COUNTRY (1270)         NIANIA

GRAND INITIATES               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 GAR & BRILL 38-4252         21  25  0   52  JUST BECAUSE (1228)        CLIFFHOME
-HEBEE 38-4359               14   9  0   51  ALL FINESSE (1236)         CLIFFHOME
 LETHE 9-4782                28  24  2   50  BLUE MOON (1025)           ZUKAL
-TORLEC 10-5018              15  12  2   49  WAR HAWKS (1026)           KOLACT
 FEAR 82-10416               13  24  1   48  4-LETTER ANXIETY (1271)    DWES EG
 MORADOR 2-5089              17   7  0   46  RESURRECTION (1065)        NIANIA
 MARY RETZLAFF 3-6119        16  21  1   41  AMERICAN APPRAISAL (1268)  OSKSI
 HIGH GUN 15-4386            15  21  1   37  TRIPLE CROWN (990)         MALCORN
 HEART 97-1096                6   5  4   34  ORGANS ON THE SAND (1273)  SHADOW GROVE
 CREDIT LINE 82-1366          0   1  0    8  WOMEN LOVE ME FOR MY (1274 DWES EG

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                    W   L  K TEAM NAME              SLAIN BY              TURN

                               PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE

Ground Pounder -- I guess you did! -- Sir Vile, aptly named

Sable -- A mere 135 minutes.  Where's your stamina?  And on your challenge no less.
Pshaw! -- Putz'n Along
P.S.  Nice learns.

Bubbles -- Popped yours, didn't I?  Took you out with a dagger.  That's a basher for
ya.  A veritable wimp. -- Dirt Worm

Liberty Belle -- Thanks for my last skill! -- W.T. Pooh, content at last

The Icelord -- Thanks for the clarification and my apologies for having mistaken the
Overlords you manage with the bunch calling themselves the Midnight Foundation.  As
Jekyll so aptly stated, you two are spectrums apart.  Lucky for you! -- Sultan

Jekyll -- Was great hearing from you last turn.  Yes, I admit, I do have a soft spot
for you (ahem, as you say) bastards!  Always fun to get you guys riled up.
Personally, I'll be glad to have you all back in the personals this summer.  Make
sure you each reintroduce yourselves one by one to me when you guys start back up.
I'd hate not throwing a "welcome back challenge" (and loss) to all of you. -- Sultan,
the MF's one-man fan club

The Icelord -- Forgot to mention that I am not a member of the VC.  I am, always have
been, and will likely remain forever an independent. -- Sultan
P.S.  VC, that's what now?

Mime -- (worried frown)  This isn't going to help the adventure much!  Authors are so
suggestible, you know.  But you fought very well, and earned the win, however much I
wish you hadn't.  Salute! -- Hallie O'Dene

Fili Liu -- Well fought but not, alas, well taught. -- Lethe

Kookaburra -- Better if you went back to your old gum tree. -- Delice the Red

Juggler -- You just did that to annoy, didn't you?  I don't care HOW many bottles you
can keep in the air at once, strong drink is a mocker!  Or, um, something bad,
anyway. -- Carrie Nation

High Gun -- (smugly)  Bang! -- Ski Mask, Founder and President Ducks With Swords

10 January 2004
ZalCon2 Updates (1/9/04)

     The contest will be starting on the turn due February 23rd, 2004 and run for 20
turns.
     Only one team will be allowed for each manager in the contest, regardless of
whether additional teams are announced as contest entries.  No exceptions for any
reason.
     The Style Master points should read that there is +1 point for beating a member
of your own style even if the warrior is not registered for the contest.
     Rolling points for consecutive turns as Style Master means that your warrior
gets the extra point every turn after the first 3 that he continues to hold the
title.
     The points for Quality Wins should be clarified to read the winning warrior is
ranked below by the number of recognition points needed for each bonus point at the
start of the fight.  For example, Warrior A (3-2-0, 17) beats Warrior B (4-1-0, 35)
and receives 2 bonus points under Quality Win for the 18 point difference in the
ranking.
     I believe that is all the clarifications for the moment, please feel free to
email, diplo, call or write me with any other questions or concerns about the
contest.
          Robert Occhipinti aka Zalgor Prigg

10 January 2004
                *     *     *  Third Annual Turf War  *     *      *

     Come one and all to DM 47 (North Fork) for the Third Annual Turf War!  Rules of
the contest will be posted in Turn #208's newsletter (due date Feb. 23).  The contest
will begin on Turn #209 (due date March 22).
     So, get a team there and register!  To register, you must send me a donation of
one (1) rollup CERTIFICATE.  Then, declare your alliance and team in the North Fork
personals.  You may also declare a warrior as champion, and that warrior will earn
(or lose!) double points in the contest!
     Roll-up certs will be *ALL* awarded as prizes, in addition to:

*** Highest Scoring Alliance -- Gets to Rename DM 47 for 6 months!
*** Most returns from DA (Alliance) -- Rename DA monsters for 6 months!
*** Most listings as "Style Masters" (Alliance) -- Pick arena to host the April "05
    Grand Tournament!
*** Warrior with the most awards -- Arenamaster named after him for 6 months!
*** Alliance with the most awards -- Pick the slow arena for TW 4!
*** Team with most "Style Master" listings -- Discover favorites of one warrior on
    team!
*** Warrior with most "Style Master" listings -- Fights at my expense for 5 turns!
    (I'll transfer $7.50 to the manager's account)
*** Alliance with the most kills -- Rename the stand-ins for 6 months!
*** Highest scoring Warrior -- Fights at my expense for 5 turns.  (I'll transfer
    $7.50 to their manager's account.)

     The contest will run for 10 turns, with the winners announced on turn #220.  See
the Turn #208 North Fork newsletter for complete rules and scoring system!  Direct
"declarations" to:  A.D. in the personals, and prize pot entry donations to:
                      Jason Mazuch HSP H-2
                      P.O. Box 339 #924385
                      Sparta, GA  31087-0339
     By snail mail or diplo through RSI.
               Bloody Sands!
                    Asmo Dius, TCB

16 January 2004
                                    CHAOTIC WINDS
     Once, long ago, the four Winds of Time descended upon Alastari like a TEMPEST of
epic proportions, they slew everything within their all-encompassing reach.  They
left nothing.  In their wake lay smoldering ruins.
     In their haste they sped towards the center of this great land like a colossal
giant would step across an ocean.  The four storms picked up momentum on their way
towards each other.  A collision was eminent.
     The first storm wind, the oldest and wisest of the four was named APEXALUS.  The
second, FLAGGSTAFF, was the quickest and loudest entity ever created.  The third Wind
of Time was MATRIATIN, neither old or young, quick or slow, but fierce and feisty all
the same.  The forth wind, ASSAMITHIUS, the youngest yet most creative in its means
of destruction.
     When finally they merged at the center of ALASTARI, an incredible destructive
explosion occurred.  And when the smoke and debris cleared they were one.  CHAOS was
born.
     And Chaos spread across the diminished lands reeking havoc and doom with its
passing, and destroying allover again that which already lay in ruin.

F E A R    C H A O S    I N C.
M A T R I X

28 January 2004
All -- I send out this invitation to all teams and managers.  A new Alliance has been
formed.  The Living Essences Alliance is being formed to join forces in an effort to
eliminate common foes and to help the joined warriors grow and learn to the best of
their abilities by offering suggestions and advice.  It doesn't matter what arena
you're in, or if you're in another alliance already, as of today.  This Alliance is
open to one and all!  If you are interested in joining, please DIPLO me, or send a
personal ad to DM 93's newsletter.  If you wish to join beyond March 2004, send a PA
to DM 82.  Come join the fun! -- Dagan LifeGiver, mgr. Shadow Warriors (DM 93)

28 January 2004
This notice is to formally introduce our young alliance, CHAOS INC.  We consist of
APEX, FLAGG, MATRIX, ASSAMITE, and now RUDE BUDDHA.  If we aren't already there, we
WILL be coming to an arena near you soon!  Hope to see you all at the ZALCON II.

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

ISHINOMORI devastated LETHE in a action packed 1 minute mismatched Challenge fight.
MIME was subdued by DIRT WORM in a exciting 5 minute Challenge Title melee.
MOJO JOJO was overpowered by MASHER in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge duel.
BUBBLES was defeated by 50 SUCKS in a crowd pleasing 2 minute Challenge match.
LIBERTY BELLE slimly lost to HALLIE O'DENE in a popular 2 minute Challenge duel.
SABLE bested GROUND POUNDER in a 2 minute Challenge match.
NUTMEG viciously subdued SATOSHI KUNO in a popular 2 minute Challenge competition.
MORADOR was vanquished by SIR VILE in a action packed 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
ANGAR overpowered QUONSET in a 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
EMERALD DRAGONFLY was overpowered by CRUSADER LORD in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
TALOS was handily defeated by NAIHREN in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
R'SHANN was subdued by ARENAMASTER AZEEM in a crowd pleasing 4 minute match.
ONE A DAY slimly won victory over SPAZZ in a exciting 4 minute brutal contest.
STARBUCK devastated KRAC D'CHEVALIERS in a 2 minute mismatched bout.
KAIDEN was handily defeated by WURP in a popular 1 minute bloody uneven fight.
BLACK RHINO lost to JUGGLER in a 2 minute fray.
MOD COD was overpowered by DELICE THE RED in a 1 minute mismatched brawl.
QRAPPY overpowered BUDDERCUP in a 2 minute brutal one-sided bout.
PUTZ'N ALONG was savagely defeated by CARRIE NATION in a popular 3 minute match.
TUTANKHAMUN devastated SKI MASK in a popular 1 minute gruesome one-sided contest.
AVALANCHE demolished HYSTERIAS in a action packed 1 minute uneven bout.
BEER GOGGLES handily defeated TICKLES in a 1 minute one-sided contest.
W.T. POOH subdued TUM in a popular 5 minute gruesome fight.
KOOKABURRA was overpowered by GAMBLE in a popular 1 minute uneven fight.
IPECAC overpowered RAISON D'ETRE in a exciting 1 minute uneven match.
FOUNTAINS OF WAYNE was vanquished by DITCH RAT in a 1 minute one-sided fray.
HEART was overcome by QUIBBLE in a action packed 1 minute mismatched bout.
KIDNEY overpowered MARY RETZLAFF in a 2 minute gruesome one-sided fight.
FEAR was handily defeated by CORAL SNAKE in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
CREDIT LINE was subdued by GAR & BRILL in a 1 minute fight.
LYTA ALEXANDER overpowered LAKE SAILOR in a popular 1 minute one-sided bout.
HIGH GUN was handily defeated by CIARAN in a action packed 2 minute mismatched match.
JAKUCHU ITO was devastated by KOGITSUNE MARU in a 1 minute one-sided battle.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                  15         PARRY-LUNGE       17 -  13 -  2      57  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                 11         BASHING ATTACK    54 -  42 -  2      56  |
|BASHING ATTACK                  10         TOTAL PARRY       38 -  32 -  0      54  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    9         PARRY-STRIKE      19 -  17 -  0      53  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  7         LUNGING ATTACK   107 - 105 -  3      50  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      5         WALL OF STEEL     62 -  62 -  0      50  |
|AIMED BLOW                       4         SLASHING ATTACK   23 -  23 -  1      50  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     2         AIMED BLOW        22 -  24 -  0      48  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      0         STRIKING ATTACK   51 -  60 -  2      46  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    0         PARRY-RIPOSTE      4 -  12 -  0      25  |

Turn 368 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

STRIKING ATTACK    7 -  4     SLASHING ATTACK    2 -  5         2  WALL OF STEEL  
TOTAL PARRY        3 -  2     AIMED BLOW         1 -  3         2  STRIKING ATTACK
WALL OF STEEL      5 -  4     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  0         2  LUNGING ATTACK 
LUNGING ATTACK     8 -  7     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  2         2  BASHING ATTACK 
BASHING ATTACK     5 -  5     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  0         2  SLASHING ATTACK
                                                                1  TOTAL PARRY    

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
TOTAL PARRY      DIRT WORM 82-2315          59  28  0  208 VERMIN!! (1124)
WALL OF STEEL    50 SUCKS 60-4129           57  34  0  199 JOKA MASHER! (833)
STRIKING ATTACK  WURP 10-18                 47  54  1  198 WAR HAWKS (1026)
LUNGING ATTACK   STARBUCK 6-5387            31  18  0  197 SCIENCE FICTION (1152)
BASHING ATTACK   MASHER 60-4553             39  36  3  194 JOKA MASHER! (833)
SLASHING ATTACK  EMERALD DRAGONFLY 60-2586  67  61  2  193 MAGICK (955)
AIMED BLOW       HALLIE O'DENE 58-6018      45  59  0  154 CIRQUE DU MASQUES (1093)

The overall popularity leader is KAIDEN 35-3108.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was TUM 18-7380.  The ten other most popular fighters were MIME 2-4966, SPAZZ 
33-6207, CARRIE NATION 64-4054, NUTMEG 7-5167, R'SHANN 20-577, DIRT WORM 82-2315, 
BUBBLES 12-4981, HALLIE O'DENE 58-6018, ONE A DAY 98-799, and W.T. POOH 33-4430.

The least popular fighter this week was FEAR 82-10416.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were MARY RETZLAFF 3-6119, FOUNTAINS OF WAYNE 98-809, RAISON D'ETRE 7-5311, 
TICKLES 9-3486, TALOS 31-2069, EMERALD DRAGONFLY 60-2586, QUONSET 10-4990, LETHE 
9-4782, HIGH GUN 15-4386, and CREDIT LINE 82-1366.

Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  
MORDANT(1)           2  0 0  ZUWAYZA(19)          0  1 0  ARADI(60)            2  3 0  
NIANIA(2)            2  2 0  SEAM(20)             0  1 0  KURUKAR(64)          1  0 0  
OSKSI(3)             0  1 0  CHIMLEVTAL(31)       1  2 0  DAL SHANG(65)        2  0 0  
TRANSEL(6)           1  0 0  NIYTYOLE ISLAND(33)  2  2 0  KYR'TERR(71)         1  1 0  
BONSUR(7)            3  3 0  MURSKA(35)           0  1 0  DAIYLA KIV(74)       0  1 0  
ZUKAL(9)             0  2 0  CLIFFHOME(38)        1  0 0  JADE MOUNTAIN(75)    1  0 0  
KOLACT(10)           5  2 0  STORMCROWE(45)       1  0 0  DWES EG(82)          2  2 0  
RIZTAB(12)           0  2 0  KHALANI(55)          0  1 0  OLD VALAMANTIS(96)   1  0 0  
MALCORN(15)          0  1 0  ROCANIS(56)          1  0 0  SHADOW GROVE(97)     0  1 0  
TALCAMA(18)          0  1 0  DELARQ TOR(58)       1  1 0  SYVYN'S HILL(98)     1  1 0  

TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 KOGITSUNE MARU 1-5298       23  18  1   84  SWEORDMASTERS (1210)       MORDANT
 MIME 2-4966                 24  15  4  180  HARLEQUINS (1186)          NIANIA
 MARY RETZLAFF 3-6119        16  21  1   41  AMERICAN APPRAISAL (1268)  OSKSI
 STARBUCK 6-5387             31  18  0  197  SCIENCE FICTION (1152)     TRANSEL
 GAMBLE 7-4884               18   8  2  122  INDIFFERENCE (1250)        BONSUR
 TICKLES 9-3486              37  61  1  112  MY PETS (554)              ZUKAL
 WURP 10-18                  47  54  1  198  WAR HAWKS (1026)           KOLACT
 BUBBLES 12-4981             25  48  1  180  POWERPUFF GIRLS (1145)     RIZTAB
 HIGH GUN 15-4386            15  21  1   37  TRIPLE CROWN (990)         MALCORN
 TUM 18-7380                 17  13  2  113  FROM THE FACE (1265)       TALCAMA
 HYSTERIAS 19-4047           27  29  3  128  ANARCHY (1151)             ZUWAYZA
 SPAZZ 33-6207               39  30  0  182  SNOTZI'S II (813)          NIYTYOLE ISLAND
 KAIDEN 35-3108              79  77  2  174  VIOLENT FEMS (972)         MURSKA
 GAR & BRILL 38-4252         21  25  0   52  JUST BECAUSE (1228)        CLIFFHOME
 IPECAC 45-3625              18   9  0  103  EMETICS (1242)             STORMCROWE
 MOD COD 55-2638             45  74  1  147  RHYME TYME (449)           KHALANI
 DELICE THE RED 56-3401      42  49  1  168  BAD APPLES (1091)          ROCANIS
 HALLIE O'DENE 58-6018       45  59  0  154  CIRQUE DU MASQUES (1093)   DELARQ TOR
 50 SUCKS 60-4129            57  34  0  199  JOKA MASHER! (833)         ARADI
 CARRIE NATION 64-4054       40  66  0  114  REFORMERS (1095)           KURUKAR
 LYTA ALEXANDER 65-5021      17   9  0   79  AND SO IT BEGINS (1062)    DAL SHANG
 BLACK RHINO 71-1834         39  30  1  129  EDGE OF EXTINCTION (973)   KYR'TERR
 GROUND POUNDER 74-3058      14  12  1   62  INSIGNIFICANCE (1266)      DAIYLA KIV
 AVALANCHE 75-2213           24   5  1  150  FORCE OF NATURE (747)      JADE MOUNTAIN
 DIRT WORM 82-2315           59  28  0  208  VERMIN!! (1124)            DWES EG
 KIDNEY 96-972                9   2  3   60  ORGAN ON THE SANDS (1272)  OLD VALAMANTIS
 HEART 97-1096                6   5  4   34  ORGANS ON THE SAND (1273)  SHADOW GROVE
 FOUNTAINS OF WAYNE 98-809   11  11  4   62  COLLEGE RADIO (1223)       SYVYN'S HILL