AD
Date : 08/11/2004 Duedate: 08/24/2004
HOME GUARD
DM-101 TURN-382
RANK TEAMS W L K % RANK TEAMS W L K %
1 COLLEGE RADI 98/1223 132 73 0 64.4 LITTLE GIRLS LIKE... 36/1304
BIG APPLE MENACE 65/836 10 SITTIN' ON A 63/1302 75 72 0 51.0
ARCANE BEACH DAY 98/1305 ANDORIAN UNIVERSITY 66/1123
2 BLADES OF ICE 7/162 341 253 6 57.4 11 SPARF! 20/1069 699 673 10 50.9
BLADES OF STEEL 17/1068 OPEN SESAME 50/824
3 FARSCAPE 10/1277 14 11 0 56.0 CHAPEL ROCK 79/776
THE BLUES 20/1286 INGRATE WHITE NORTH 60/1006
4 CARTOUCHE 71/1111 518 409 4 55.9 HERE TO PHOENIX 26/1072
5 MAGIC MAYHEM 73/1298 23 19 1 54.8 ROYAL FLUSH 47/146
SCREEN DREAMS 47/1299 NOT QUITE 59/1237
6 QUBIT 10/1136 778 661 6 54.1 BLOWN AWAY 44/820
JOKA MASHER! 60/833 DUCKS UNLIMITED 39/1221
TRIPLE CROWN 15/990 12 ALL FINESSE 38/1236 57 55 0 50.9
SIR AGLIO 10/788 SUGAR AND SPICE 7/1231
SNOTZI'S II 33/813 BATHTUB ARMADA 7/1196
VERMIN!! 82/1124 13 EMETICS 45/1242 54 56 0 49.1
VERMIN! 82/1267 BUMS 'R' US 60/1142
JOKA MASHER 82/917 JOYS OF BOOZE 33/1209
VERMIN 72/771 14 VIOLENT FEMS 35/972 391 524 9 42.7
7 4-LETTER ANX 82/1271 255 216 1 54.1 JUST BECAUSE 38/1228
GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME 99/1306 15 MY PETS 9/554 465 727 12 39.0
ORGAN ON THE SANDS 96/1272 RHYME TYME 55/449
ORGANS ON THE SAND 97/1273 GIRL SCOUT COOKIES 33/812
WOMEN LOVE ME FOR MY 82/1274 16 REFORMERS 64/1095 436 739 4 37.1
8 TWISTED SESA 99/1307 103 92 1 52.8 CIRQUE DU MASQUES 58/1093
9 NINJAS 7/1060 210 201 2 51.1 BAD APPLES 56/1091
FROM THE FACE 18/1265 17-THE GUARDIANS 21/939 4 7 0 36.4
RESURRECTION 2/1065 18 AMERICAN APPR 3/1268 5 10 0 33.3
'##/###' Avoid teams by their Team Id '-' Team did not fight this turn
REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER
"The sages err'd not in their foretelling of a god descending upon HOME GUARD,
for I, Novgorodny Vir, have returned!" Some days I really love that guy. Talk about
having a solid brass pair!
"And how sociable are HOME GUARD's warriors? Come, let us see." Not sociable
enough to write personals. "Perhaps the warriors of WOMEN LOVE ME FOR MY should take
up some hobbies, as they are the most avoided team... The warriors of WOMEN LOVE ME
FOR MY found their efforts at combat frustrated as HERE TO PHOENIX apparently had
more important things to do than fight." And more of the same. He never learns any
new lines. Well, no wonder, you need brains to learn, and he's a little short in
that capacity. The only other point of interest he had was that 50 Sucks was most
challenged. Big deal.
QUONSET (10-4990) (27-21-0,77) of QUBIT fought MORADOR (2-5089) (27-10-1,70) of
RESURRECTION. QUONSET beat MORADOR in a 2 minute fray. Yelling, "Hut! Hut!" all
the time. Ol' Quonset is a little odd, maybe, but not the oddest warrior on the Isle
by a long chalck.
PUTZ'N ALONG (60-5437) (33-31-0,77) of JOKA MASHER! fought HERMY (101-4) (0-0-
0,50) of Really Bored Fans. PUTZ'N ALONG luckily beat HERMY in a 13 minute bloody
match. And if Hermy was bored before the fight, it's nothing to the way she felt at
the end. Thirteen minutes? And people call Putz a gladiator!
ELENA (63-2356) (15-4-0,63) of SITTIN' ON ACES fought MAN O' WAR (15-4517) (22-
10-1,82) of TRIPLE CROWN. ELENA won victory over MAN O' WAR in a crowd pleasing 2
minute fight. You know how it goes, women just can't seem to get enough of horses,
and the crowds love to see a woman ride. Quite a sight, too, made a lot of people's
day.
CREDIT LINE (82-1366) (0-14-0,51) of WOMEN LOVE ME FOR MY fought GAR & BRILL
(38-4252) (24-35-0,44) of JUST BECAUSE. CREDIT LINE was handily defeated by GAR &
BRILL in a 1 minute mismatched match. Too bad CL didn't get matched with a woman,
who might have loved him. But G&B is, uh, not a woman. So just take that CL to
stand for Chopped Liver.
EVIL ELMO (99-1222) (9-1-4,32) of TWISTED SESAME fought PINK BEAR (36-5883) (23-
11-1,79) of LITTLE GIRLS LIKE... EVIL ELMO narrowly defeated PINK BEAR in a 4 minute
gory one-sided bout. I asked a little girl about this match, seemed like the thing
to do. Gods, they start 'em young on arena fandom these days! Just a little thing,
she was, but she really liked the gore. Elmo, she said, had to be evil, though, if
he was going to do all that to the Bear. Well, okay, she said the pink was over the
top, and the Bear should've been blue, but other than that.... And hey, you can't
doubt the word of a little girl!
KOOKABURRA (33-4151) (49-70-2,95) of GIRL SCOUT COOKIES fought MARY RETZLAFF (3-
6119) (20-30-1,67) of AMERICAN APPRAISAL. KOOKABURRA was handily defeated by MARY
RETZLAFF in a 1 minute one-sided fight. Many people are defeated by these cookies.
I have to admit that I've never tried 'em, myself. Thin Mints or nothing.
BECKY (17-5782) (14-2-2,92) of BLADES OF STEEL fought BLACK EYE (60-6163) (18-
11-0,64) of JOKA MASHER! BECKY overpowered BLACK EYE in a 1 minute gruesome one-
sided fight. A feisty woman, Becky. Myself, I think she should have blacked his
OTHER eye, too. After all, any joka' that'd hit a woman, or maybe I should say TRY
to hit a woman, deserves black eyes all around.
AEDON (7-4295) (37-20-1,122) of BLADES OF ICE fought ISHINOMORI (7-5390) (28-8-
1,114) of NINJAS. AEDON was viciously subdued by ISHINOMORI in a crowd pleasing 2
minute gruesome bout. Which just shows you how sneaky these ninja types can be.
Ishi waited until Aedon's blade melted--it took twenty-three seconds--and then went
at him with both feet.
FEAR (82-10416) (21-29-1,104) of 4-LETTER ANXIETY fought RAISON D'ETRE (7-5311)
(21-16-3,115) of BATHTUB ARMADA. FEAR was savagely defeated by RAISON D'ETRE in an
action packed 2 minute gory duel. There's some kind of philosophical something-or-
other in this, but this is not my day to do philosophical, so you'll have to work it
out for yourself. Write a personal next time to give your views.
PRIZMATYK WAHL (73-4252) (18-8-2,101) of MAGIC MAYHEM fought SPUTTER (82-15095)
(30-18-1,115) of JOKA MASHER. PRIZMATYK WAHL was overpowered by SPUTTER in an action
packed 1 minute one-sided bout. Okay, it worked, but what a mess! The janitors are
ticked off. Something about it being a lot easier to get blood out of a purple robe
than sputter. I didn't know they did laundry on the side, but everybody's
moonlighting these days.
EXILE (7-4618) (25-19-1,130) of BLADES OF ICE fought MARY ANN (47-4378) (16-19-
0,134) of SCREEN DREAMS. EXILE won victory over MARY ANN in a popular 3 minute
gruesome match. Does this mean Exile gets to go home? Is it COOL where he comes
from? Because if it is, he can take me along with him.
TUTANKHAMUN (71-3357) (29-18-0,158) of CARTOUCHE fought SIR VILE (10-4754) (28-
27-1,149) of SIR AGLIO. TUTANKHAMUN subdued SIR VILE in a popular 1 minute fight.
Also known as Revenge of the Mummy, although I'm not sure what he was revenging. An
insult to his mother, perhaps.
JOE KING (47-2223) (30-51-1,167) of ROYAL FLUSH fought HALLIE O'DENE (58-6018)
(50-67-0,147) of CIRQUE DU MASQUES. JOE KING was handily defeated by HALLIE O'DENE
in a 1 minute one-sided contest. Looks like a case of experience getting the upper
hand, right? And age, but one should never mention a woman's age if she happens to
be holding a sword at the time.
IPECAC (45-3625) (25-15-0,171) of EMETICS fought KIDNEY (96-972) (15-9-3,123) of
ORGAN ON THE SANDS. IPECAC demolished KIDNEY in an action packed 1 minute uneven
bout. This was interesting, in a disgusting sort of way, because the kidneys are not
the organs Ipecac usually deals with.
MOD COD (55-2638) (53-79-1,165) of RHYME TYME fought NED THE JANITOR (66-2973)
(24-22-0,157) of ANDORIAN UNIVERSITY. MOD COD butchered NED THE JANITOR in a 1
minute gruesome one-sided bout. Well... this is one way to get the clean-up crew off
your back after you drench the sands with grue. But if I were Mod Cod, I wouldn't go
down any unswept hallways.
TICKLES (9-3486) (47-64-1,208) of MY PETS fought DELICE THE RED (56-3401) (50-
54-2,210) of BAD APPLES. TICKLES was overpowered by DELICE THE RED in a 1 minute
mismatched fight. That is one BAAAD apple, there. Note to anyone thinking of
challenging the redhead: don't rely on tickling to win.
AERYN SUN (10-4268) (24-10-0,190) of FARSCAPE fought DITCH RAT (82-15360) (25-
24-3,159) of VERMIN! AERYN SUN overpowered DITCH RAT in an exciting 1 minute brutal
one-sided bout. This is one of those allegorical things, you know, the power of the
sun, the rat, creature of darkness, that sort of stuff. Heavy going, but sometimes
you gotta have it. So they tell me.
JAKUCHU ITO (7-5102) (29-15-0,192) of NINJAS fought MASHER (60-4553) (46-42-
3,188) of JOKA MASHER! JAKUCHU ITO overpowered MASHER in a crowd pleasing 1 minute
mismatched brawl. Was Jakuchu acting as a hero here? A lot of women have complained
about a "masher" lurking in the more crowded alleys of Talahya. Does Jakuchu suspect
that THIS is the masher in question? Does the crowd agree?
DIRT WORM (82-2315) (66-34-0,193) of VERMIN!! fought EMILY (17-5753) (30-18-
0,204) of BLADES OF STEEL. DIRT WORM was bested by EMILY in an action packed 3
minute duel. It isn't what you'd expect of a lady with a high-toned name like Emily,
but then again, she's steely under the lace. She CAN squish worms if that is the
right thing to do.
Ah, challenge matches. Signs that somehwere, some manager or managers were
paying attention. You'd never guess by looking at the personals....
HOCKEY DUCK (39-937) (25-17-1,77) of DUCKS UNLIMITED challenged SKI MASK (58-
5869) (37-61-0,70) of CIRQUE DU MASQUES. Down 7. HOCKEY DUCK slimly won victory
over SKI MASK in a 2 minute Challenge bout. This seems to mark a division in the
ranks of the Ducks. Is it a race thing? There are, after all, more than one kind of
Duck. Or is it political? Maybe two sides of a romantic triangle? Tell all, you
Ducks!
NUTCRACKER (38-4380) (18-7-1,41) of ALL FINESSE challenged SATOSHI KUNO (7-5229)
(22-19-0,66) of NINJAS. Up 25. NUTCRACKER was handily defeated by SATOSHI KUNO in a
1 minute Challenge contest. Not an unexpected result, perhaps, but there is always
the chance of skills. Learning a lot of skills makes up for hard knocks, here where
you can't die permanently. After all, what ELSE have you got to do?
BLACK JACK SHELACK (47-4850) (17-13-1,62) of ROYAL FLUSH challenged CARRIE
NATION (64-4054) (42-77-0,58) of REFORMERS. Down 4. BLACK JACK SHELACK overpowered
CARRIE NATION in a 2 minute one-sided Challenge match. And if anybody has told you
that I'd like a sample of Black Jack's coffin varnish, don't you believe it! I don't
need a smaple, he buys it from me! Hey, somebody's got to make and sell this rotgut.
IMMOVEABLE OBJECT (59-2110) (20-6-1,64) of NOT QUITE challenged QUIBBLE (10-
4756) (24-46-0,91) of QUBIT. Up 27. IMMOVEABLE OBJECT outlasted QUIBBLE in an
action packed 7 minute gory Challenge match. Action packed? This is a joke, right?
Those two turkeys stood out there and ARGUED for the whole seven minutes. The only
action was tongue action.
FOUNTAINS OF WAYNE (98-809) (19-16-4,93) of COLLEGE RADIO challenged BRICK (20-
389) (37-35-0,141) of THE BLUES. Up 48. FOUNTAINS OF WAYNE overpowered BRICK in a
popular 1 minute uneven Challenge duel. Fountains of acid, more like. I've never
seen a brick dissolve faster.
NUTMEG (7-5167) (22-15-1,133) of SUGAR AND SPICE challenged BEER GOGGLES (33-
6819) (29-29-1,133) of JOYS OF BOOZE. Straight across. You just do that to see if
I'm paying attention, don't you? NUTMEG vanquished BEER GOGGLES in an action packed
1 minute uneven Challenge duel. Actually, what nutmeg'll do in the long run is give
you a heck of a headache. So many things do. Seems to be some kind of law.
Probably passed by an aspirin company.
ROT TEN EGGS (47-3099) (36-35-0,135) of ROYAL FLUSH challenged KAIDEN (35-3108)
(86-83-2,163) of VIOLENT FEMS. Up 28. ROT TEN EGGS devastated KAIDEN in a 1 minute
one-sided Challenge competition. And not only Kaiden, the whole arena was devastated
by those damned eggs. Phew!
PERFECT TEN (47-4218) (28-22-1,168) of ROYAL FLUSH challenged SPAZZ (33-6207)
(43-39-0,170) of SNOTZI'S II. Up 2. PERFECT TEN was viciously subdued by SPAZZ in a
3 minute Challenge fight. And who is this Spazz, you ask, who can win by apparent
accident and wild flailing? Well, he comes from the island of striped ice cream, and
you know what THAT means!
APPLE JACK (47-4011) (30-24-4,159) of ROYAL FLUSH challenged BUDDERCUP (60-5967)
(36-31-0,177) of BUMS 'R' US. Up 18. APPLE JACK was savagely defeated by BUDDERCUP
in a 2 minute Challenge match. That Buddercup is about the savagest bum you're
likely to meet. Mainly because after meeting the savage blossom, you won't be
meeting anybody else. Oh, sure, no ARENA deaths, but who knows what goes on in the
darker alleys? Very busy places, alleys. Crowded, too.
Ah, some tv challenges, and managers/warriors who aren't too lazy to use 'em.
TAOS (26-4042) (12-9-1,46) of HERE TO PHOENIX TV challenged 2 PHAT (72-5064)
(18-5-1,36) of VERMIN. Down 10. TAOS bested 2 PHAT in a 2 minute Challenge fight.
What, you might ask, does this represent? A grudge between managers? A little
inside knowledge? The eternal search for the easy win?
UZI (44-1701) (27-26-1,149) of BLOWN AWAY TV challenged W.T. POOH (33-4430) (67-
51-0,154) of SNOTZI'S II. Up 5. UZI was savagely defeated by W.T. POOH in an action
packed 3 minute Challenge fight. Be warned, warriors of Home Guard, this Pooh is no
pushover!
MICHAEL J'EH FOX (60-5263) (22-12-2,122) of INGRATE WHITE NORTH TV challenged
KONGOL (7-4524) (33-20-2,116) of BLADES OF ICE. Down 6. MICHAEL J'EH FOX subdued
KONGOL in a 2 minute Challenge melee. Okay, you think maybe I shouldn't labor the
icy blades? Fine. Give me something else to talk about by speaking in the
personals, developing your characters, heck, even send me a diplo!
STEVE MCQUEEN (47-3908) (36-35-1,198) of ROYAL FLUSH TV challenged 50 SUCKS (60-
4129) (68-36-1,216) of JOKA MASHER! Up 18. STEVE MCQUEEN was viciously subdued by
50 SUCKS in a 5 minute Challenge fight. That'll teach Stevie boy to go challenging a
senior citizen!
And for the title, which nobody cared enough about to issue a challenge over:
TIME SQUARE (65-4637) (30-12-0,216) of BIG APPLE MENACE fought TUM (18-7380) (27-16-
2,222) of FROM THE FACE. TIME SQUARE was handily defeated by TUM in a popular 1
minute uneven Title fight. I dunno if this is an improvement, but at least it's a
change.
O.M.
CAPTAIN OF THE GUARD W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
TUM 18-7380 28 16 2 242 FROM THE FACE (1265) TALCAMA
GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
EMILY 17-5753 31 18 0 226 BLADES OF STEEL (1068) ALJAFIR
50 SUCKS 60-4129 69 36 1 224 JOKA MASHER! (833) ARADI
DELICE THE RED 56-3401 51 54 2 221 BAD APPLES (1091) ROCANIS
GRAND CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
STEVE MCQUEEN 47-3908 36 36 1 205 ROYAL FLUSH (146) NORTH FORK
JAKUCHU ITO 7-5102 30 15 0 204 NINJAS (1060) BONSUR
MOD COD 55-2638 54 79 2 200 RHYME TYME (449) KHALANI
AERYN SUN 10-4268 25 10 0 194 FARSCAPE (1277) KOLACT
DIRT WORM 82-2315 66 35 0 193 VERMIN!! (1124) DWES EG
TIME SQUARE 65-4637 30 13 0 193 BIG APPLE MENACE (836) DAL SHANG
TICKLES 9-3486 47 65 1 191 MY PETS (554) ZUKAL
MASHER 60-4553 46 43 3 183 JOKA MASHER! (833) ARADI
BUDDERCUP 60-5967 37 31 0 183 BUMS 'R' US (1142) ARADI
GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
SPAZZ 33-6207 44 39 0 180 SNOTZI'S II (813) NIYTYOLE ISLAND
IPECAC 45-3625 26 15 0 173 EMETICS (1242) STORMCROWE
HALLIE O'DENE 58-6018 51 67 0 167 CIRQUE DU MASQUES (1093) DELARQ TOR
-POPE PAUL II 79-1317 23 13 0 167 CHAPEL ROCK (776) MIROI CHANG
PERFECT TEN 47-4218 28 23 1 166 ROYAL FLUSH (146) NORTH FORK
GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
TUTANKHAMUN 71-3357 30 18 0 163 CARTOUCHE (1111) KYR'TERR
ROT TEN EGGS 47-3099 37 35 0 162 ROYAL FLUSH (146) NORTH FORK
APPLE JACK 47-4011 30 25 4 162 ROYAL FLUSH (146) NORTH FORK
DITCH RAT 82-15360 25 25 3 161 VERMIN! (1267) DWES EG
W.T. POOH 33-4430 68 51 0 160 SNOTZI'S II (813) NIYTYOLE ISLAND
GRAND ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
UZI 44-1701 27 27 1 150 BLOWN AWAY (820) KRILL
SIR VILE 10-4754 28 28 1 149 SIR AGLIO (788) KOLACT
NED THE JANITOR 66-2973 24 23 0 149 ANDORIAN UNIVERSITY (1123) TARRGIR
JOE KING 47-2223 30 52 1 147 ROYAL FLUSH (146) NORTH FORK
NUTMEG 7-5167 23 15 1 144 SUGAR AND SPICE (1231) BONSUR
KAIDEN 35-3108 86 84 2 140 VIOLENT FEMS (972) MURSKA
EXILE 7-4618 26 19 1 140 BLADES OF ICE (162) BONSUR
ISHINOMORI 7-5390 29 8 1 135 NINJAS (1060) BONSUR
MICHAEL J'EH FOX 60-5263 23 12 2 133 INGRATE WHITE NORTH (1006) ARADI
FOUNTAINS OF WAYNE 98-809 20 16 4 131 COLLEGE RADIO (1223) SYVYN'S HILL
KIDNEY 96-972 15 10 3 128 ORGAN ON THE SANDS (1272) OLD VALAMANTIS
SPUTTER 82-15095 31 18 1 127 JOKA MASHER (917) DWES EG
-ROWDY YOBBO 20-3429 23 22 1 127 SPARF! (1069) SEAM
BEER GOGGLES 33-6819 29 30 1 125 JOYS OF BOOZE (1209) NIYTYOLE ISLAND
RAISON D'ETRE 7-5311 22 16 3 120 BATHTUB ARMADA (1196) BONSUR
AEDON 7-4295 37 21 1 119 BLADES OF ICE (162) BONSUR
KONGOL 7-4524 33 21 2 116 BLADES OF ICE (162) BONSUR
BRICK 20-389 37 36 0 108 THE BLUES (1286) SEAM
-OSCAR 50-3153 29 8 0 107 OPEN SESAME (824) SNOWBOUND
FEAR 82-10416 21 30 1 104 4-LETTER ANXIETY (1271) DWES EG
-THE WALL 21-2660 24 15 1 101 THE GUARDIANS (939) SUNSET
GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
BECKY 17-5782 15 2 2 99 BLADES OF STEEL (1068) ALJAFIR
PRIZMATYK WAHL 73-4252 18 9 2 98 MAGIC MAYHEM (1298) ERINIKA
-CLOUDS AWAY 50-3332 18 6 2 97 OPEN SESAME (824) SNOWBOUND
MARY RETZLAFF 3-6119 21 30 1 92 AMERICAN APPRAISAL (1268) OSKSI
GRAND INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
QUONSET 10-4990 28 21 0 90 QUBIT (1136) KOLACT
ELENA 63-2356 16 4 0 87 SITTIN' ON ACES (1302) AMEN-TEI
IMMOVEABLE OBJECT 59-2110 21 6 1 83 NOT QUITE (1237) ILLIS
HOCKEY DUCK 39-937 26 17 1 81 DUCKS UNLIMITED (1221) XOCHITHLAN
-RIFT 12-3922 22 13 1 80 SPIRITUAL GIFT (791) RIZTAB
PUTZ'N ALONG 60-5437 34 31 0 79 JOKA MASHER! (833) ARADI
QUIBBLE 10-4756 24 47 0 79 QUBIT (1136) KOLACT
-HEART 97-1096 8 15 4 79 ORGANS ON THE SAND (1273) SHADOW GROVE
SATOSHI KUNO 7-5229 23 19 0 77 NINJAS (1060) BONSUR
MAN O' WAR 15-4517 22 11 1 73 TRIPLE CROWN (990) MALCORN
-MISS STEP 8-3978 19 16 0 73 LADIES IN WAITING (595) ARKERS
SKI MASK 58-5869 37 62 0 72 CIRQUE DU MASQUES (1093) DELARQ TOR
BLACK JACK SHELACK 47-4850 18 13 1 72 ROYAL FLUSH (146) NORTH FORK
KOOKABURRA 33-4151 49 71 2 71 GIRL SCOUT COOKIES (812) NIYTYOLE ISLAND
MORADOR 2-5089 27 11 1 70 RESURRECTION (1065) NIANIA
-MISS CON DUCK 39-2344 17 17 2 70 DUCKS UNLIMITED (1221) XOCHITHLAN
EVIL ELMO 99-1222 10 1 4 68 TWISTED SESAME (1307) SOUTH RIDGE
BLACK EYE 60-6163 18 12 0 64 JOKA MASHER! (833) ARADI
GAR & BRILL 38-4252 25 35 0 58 JUST BECAUSE (1228) CLIFFHOME
TAOS 26-4042 13 9 1 56 HERE TO PHOENIX (1072) CALEAM
-R IS FOR REPUGNANT 99-1155 8 3 4 54 GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME (1306) SOUTH RIDGE
PINK BEAR 36-5883 23 12 1 53 LITTLE GIRLS LIKE... (1304 JHANS
CARRIE NATION 64-4054 42 78 0 50 REFORMERS (1095) KURUKAR
NUTCRACKER 38-4380 18 8 1 38 ALL FINESSE (1236) CLIFFHOME
CREDIT LINE 82-1366 0 15 0 37 WOMEN LOVE ME FOR MY (1274 DWES EG
GRAND INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
2 PHAT 72-5064 18 6 1 36 VERMIN (771) DRAGONHEAD
'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.
THE DEAD W L K TEAM NAME SLAIN BY TURN
NED THE JANITOR 66-2973 24 23 0 ANDORIAN UNIVERSI 1123 MOD COD 55-2638 382
PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE
Apple Jack -- Apples are better if not left lying around long enough to ferment, as
*I* know and you SHOULD know. But men always like things fermented. It must be a
guy thing. -- Delice the Red and Fresh
Hockey Duck -- (jumping up and down and gibbering) You unspeakable, insufferable
traitor to Duckkind everywhere! May a cow sit on your eggs! -- Ski Mask
Rot Ten Eggs -- Oh, my. Did a cow sit on you? -- Hallie O'Deene
Man O'War -- Doubtless there are people out there--gladiators and especially
MANAGERS--who think it's FUNNY to get a horse drunk! And then, further, they laugh
when the poor drunken beast TRAMPLES somebody! I curse you all! May everything you
raise to your lips to drink turn into/out to be stagnant water! -- Carrie Nation
Lost. Small black dog, answers to the name of Tutu. Lost somewhere between here and
Kansas. If found, approach with care, as he has been known to bite. Witches are
especially warned against approaching this dog. However, if you want him, he's
yours.
Wanted to buy. Pair of matched gray carriage horses. Actually, make that three, as
it is always good to have a spare. Must be comfortable around lightning. Will pay a
song, two if the horses are very good. Ask at the Grey Tower.
For sale. Black, two-wheel carriage in the Fratsfan style, vintage 499, but in good
condition, only driven on the nights of the full moon. The brimstone smell is nearly
gone already, really, and another year or two of alchemical treatments should see it
completely eradicated. Five hundred eagles or best offer.
For all your cleaning needs! Lizona's Magical and Alchemical Laundry, results
guaranteed, or your garments back. Bloodstains our specialty.
Tired of going drinking by yourself? Apply at the Laughing Barmaid's Escort Service
for a friend in need.
Personals Written While You Wait. Generic comments five coppers each, personalized
statements will come higher. Ask at the arena office for the Trustworthy Scribe.
The person who left a towel (pink with yellow duckies) at Madame Kay's Bathhouse can
retrieve their property at the front desk.
Seeking information on the person or persons who thought it would be amusing to plant
poison ivy in my herbacious border. Reward offered. Contact Mrs. Arlou at Box 47.
Trig -- All is at an end. -- Miriane
17 July 2004
I am currently trying to put together a favorites chart for AD warriors. I
desperately need help with this. What I need are style, favorite rhythm (ex.:
hi/low), favorite weapons, and tactics. What would be great is if you could send me
a copy of the invite with the warrior's name, id#, and arena blacked out. This way,
I can verify that this is an actual warrior. Minis will work, too!
For those interested, I have both a challenge style vs. style and a match-up style
vs. style chart. There's about 250 fights calculated in these charts, and I'll be
happy to send a copy to anyone who asks. You can contact me (if you're a free world
player) at: Rick Stringer, Merit/East, SCI, P.O. Box 500, Georgetown, DE 19947-0500.
If you're in prison, just send a diplo to: Baphomet, Mgr. Knights Templar (568), DM
#47--North Fork. (I also have a lot of other charts and info for anyone who wants
it.) Thanks!
30 July 2004
The total number of fights calculated was reported as 250 fights. This is a
misprint. It should have read "over 2,500 fights." -- Baphomet
LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS
STEVE MCQUEEN was viciously subdued by 50 SUCKS in a 5 minute Challenge fight.
MICHAEL J'EH FOX subdued KONGOL in a 2 minute Challenge melee.
UZI was savagely defeated by W.T. POOH in a action packed 3 minute Challenge fight.
TAOS bested 2 PHAT in a 2 minute Challenge fight.
APPLE JACK was savagely defeated by BUDDERCUP in a 2 minute Challenge match.
PERFECT TEN was viciously subdued by SPAZZ in a 3 minute Challenge fight.
ROT TEN EGGS devastated KAIDEN in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge competition.
NUTMEG vanquished BEER GOGGLES in a action packed 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
FOUNTAINS OF WAYNE overpowered BRICK in a popular 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
IMMOVEABLE OBJECT outlasted QUIBBLE in a action packed 7 minute gory Challenge match.
BLACK JACK SHELACK overpowered CARRIE NATION in a 2 minute one-sided Challenge match.
NUTCRACKER was handily defeated by SATOSHI KUNO in a 1 minute Challenge contest.
HOCKEY DUCK slimly won victory over SKI MASK in a 2 minute Challenge bout.
TIME SQUARE was handily defeated by TUM in a popular 1 minute uneven Title fight.
DIRT WORM was bested by EMILY in a action packed 3 minute duel.
JAKUCHU ITO overpowered MASHER in a crowd pleasing 1 minute mismatched brawl.
AERYN SUN overpowered DITCH RAT in a exciting 1 minute brutal one-sided bout.
TICKLES was overpowered by DELICE THE RED in a 1 minute mismatched fight.
MOD COD butchered NED THE JANITOR in a 1 minute gruesome one-sided bout.
IPECAC demolished KIDNEY in a action packed 1 minute uneven bout.
JOE KING was handily defeated by HALLIE O'DENE in a 1 minute one-sided contest.
TUTANKHAMUN subdued SIR VILE in a popular 1 minute fight.
EXILE won victory over MARY ANN in a popular 3 minute gruesome match.
PRIZMATYK WAHL was overpowered by SPUTTER in a action packed 1 minute one-sided bout.
FEAR was savagely defeated by RAISON D'ETRE in a action packed 2 minute gory duel.
AEDON was viciously subdued by ISHINOMORI in a crowd pleasing 2 minute gruesome bout.
BECKY overpowered BLACK EYE in a 1 minute gruesome one-sided fight.
KOOKABURRA was handily defeated by MARY RETZLAFF in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
EVIL ELMO narrowly defeated PINK BEAR in a 4 minute gory one-sided bout.
CREDIT LINE was handily defeated by GAR & BRILL in a 1 minute mismatched match.
ELENA won victory over MAN O' WAR in a crowd pleasing 2 minute fight.
PUTZ'N ALONG luckily beat HERMY in a 13 minute bloody match.
QUONSET beat MORADOR in a 2 minute fray.
BATTLE REPORT
MOST POPULAR RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS
|FIGHTING STYLE FIGHTS FIGHTING STYLE W - L - K PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK 18 PARRY-LUNGE 14 - 3 - 0 82 |
|AIMED BLOW 10 SLASHING ATTACK 28 - 12 - 1 70 |
|WALL OF STEEL 10 PARRY-RIPOSTE 2 - 1 - 0 67 |
|STRIKING ATTACK 8 LUNGING ATTACK 88 - 70 - 1 56 |
|BASHING ATTACK 8 TOTAL PARRY 25 - 27 - 0 48 |
|TOTAL PARRY 5 PARRY-STRIKE 8 - 9 - 0 47 |
|SLASHING ATTACK 3 STRIKING ATTACK 39 - 46 - 1 46 |
|PARRY-LUNGE 1 AIMED BLOW 31 - 38 - 0 45 |
|PARRY-STRIKE 1 WALL OF STEEL 39 - 48 - 2 45 |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE 1 BASHING ATTACK 34 - 47 - 0 42 |
Turn 382 was great if you Not so great if you used The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles: the fighting styles: top eleven warriors are:
PARRY-LUNGE 1 - 0 TOTAL PARRY 2 - 3 4 LUNGING ATTACK
PARRY-STRIKE 1 - 0 BASHING ATTACK 2 - 6 2 AIMED BLOW
PARRY-RIPOSTE 1 - 0 1 WALL OF STEEL
SLASHING ATTACK 2 - 1 1 STRIKING ATTACK
LUNGING ATTACK 10 - 8 1 PARRY-LUNGE
AIMED BLOW 5 - 5 1 TOTAL PARRY
STRIKING ATTACK 4 - 4 1 BASHING ATTACK
WALL OF STEEL 5 - 5
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE
FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME
LUNGING ATTACK TUM 18-7380 28 16 2 242 FROM THE FACE (1265)
AIMED BLOW EMILY 17-5753 31 18 0 226 BLADES OF STEEL (1068)
WALL OF STEEL 50 SUCKS 60-4129 69 36 1 224 JOKA MASHER! (833)
STRIKING ATTACK DELICE THE RED 56-3401 51 54 2 221 BAD APPLES (1091)
PARRY-LUNGE AERYN SUN 10-4268 25 10 0 194 FARSCAPE (1277)
TOTAL PARRY DIRT WORM 82-2315 66 35 0 193 VERMIN!! (1124)
BASHING ATTACK TICKLES 9-3486 47 65 1 191 MY PETS (554)
PARRY-STRIKE ROT TEN EGGS 47-3099 37 35 0 162 ROYAL FLUSH (146)
SLASHING ATTACK ISHINOMORI 7-5390 29 8 1 135 NINJAS (1060)
PARRY-RIPOSTE HOCKEY DUCK 39-937 26 17 1 81 DUCKS UNLIMITED (1221)
The overall popularity leader is KAIDEN 35-3108. The most popular warrior this turn
was SPAZZ 33-6207. The ten other most popular fighters were EMILY 17-5753, MAN O'
WAR 15-4517, 50 SUCKS 60-4129, MARY ANN 47-4378, QUIBBLE 10-4756, STEVE MCQUEEN
47-3908, ISHINOMORI 7-5390, BUDDERCUP 60-5967, SKI MASK 58-5869, and UZI 44-1701.
The least popular fighter this week was PUTZ'N ALONG 60-5437. The other ten least
popular fighters were CREDIT LINE 82-1366, NED THE JANITOR 66-2973, TIME SQUARE
65-4637, KOOKABURRA 33-4151, BLACK EYE 60-6163, FEAR 82-10416, PRIZMATYK WAHL
73-4252, JOE KING 47-2223, DITCH RAT 82-15360, and NUTCRACKER 38-4380.
Arena (Number) W L K Arena (Number) W L K Arena (Number) W L K
NIANIA(2) 0 1 0 JHANS(36) 0 1 0 AMEN-TEI(63) 1 0 0
OSKSI(3) 1 0 0 CLIFFHOME(38) 1 1 0 KURUKAR(64) 0 1 0
BONSUR(7) 6 2 0 XOCHITHLAN(39) 1 0 0 DAL SHANG(65) 0 1 0
ZUKAL(9) 0 1 0 KRILL(44) 0 1 0 TARRGIR(66) 0 1 0
KOLACT(10) 2 2 0 STORMCROWE(45) 1 0 0 KYR'TERR(71) 1 0 0
MALCORN(15) 0 1 0 NORTH FORK(47) 2 5 0 DRAGONHEAD(72) 0 1 0
ALJAFIR(17) 2 0 0 KHALANI(55) 1 0 1 ERINIKA(73) 0 1 0
TALCAMA(18) 1 0 0 ROCANIS(56) 1 0 0 DWES EG(82) 1 4 0
SEAM(20) 0 1 0 DELARQ TOR(58) 1 1 0 OLD VALAMANTIS(96) 0 1 0
CALEAM(26) 1 0 0 ILLIS(59) 1 0 0 SYVYN'S HILL(98) 1 0 0
NIYTYOLE ISLAND(33) 2 2 0 ARADI(60) 4 2 0 SOUTH RIDGE(99) 1 0 0
MURSKA(35) 0 1 0
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
MORADOR 2-5089 27 11 1 70 RESURRECTION (1065) NIANIA
MARY RETZLAFF 3-6119 21 30 1 92 AMERICAN APPRAISAL (1268) OSKSI
JAKUCHU ITO 7-5102 30 15 0 204 NINJAS (1060) BONSUR
TICKLES 9-3486 47 65 1 191 MY PETS (554) ZUKAL
AERYN SUN 10-4268 25 10 0 194 FARSCAPE (1277) KOLACT
MAN O' WAR 15-4517 22 11 1 73 TRIPLE CROWN (990) MALCORN
EMILY 17-5753 31 18 0 226 BLADES OF STEEL (1068) ALJAFIR
TUM 18-7380 28 16 2 242 FROM THE FACE (1265) TALCAMA
BRICK 20-389 37 36 0 108 THE BLUES (1286) SEAM
TAOS 26-4042 13 9 1 56 HERE TO PHOENIX (1072) CALEAM
SPAZZ 33-6207 44 39 0 180 SNOTZI'S II (813) NIYTYOLE ISLAND
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
KAIDEN 35-3108 86 84 2 140 VIOLENT FEMS (972) MURSKA
PINK BEAR 36-5883 23 12 1 53 LITTLE GIRLS LIKE... (1304 JHANS
GAR & BRILL 38-4252 25 35 0 58 JUST BECAUSE (1228) CLIFFHOME
HOCKEY DUCK 39-937 26 17 1 81 DUCKS UNLIMITED (1221) XOCHITHLAN
UZI 44-1701 27 27 1 150 BLOWN AWAY (820) KRILL
IPECAC 45-3625 26 15 0 173 EMETICS (1242) STORMCROWE
STEVE MCQUEEN 47-3908 36 36 1 205 ROYAL FLUSH (146) NORTH FORK
MOD COD 55-2638 54 79 2 200 RHYME TYME (449) KHALANI
DELICE THE RED 56-3401 51 54 2 221 BAD APPLES (1091) ROCANIS
HALLIE O'DENE 58-6018 51 67 0 167 CIRQUE DU MASQUES (1093) DELARQ TOR
IMMOVEABLE OBJECT 59-2110 21 6 1 83 NOT QUITE (1237) ILLIS
50 SUCKS 60-4129 69 36 1 224 JOKA MASHER! (833) ARADI
ELENA 63-2356 16 4 0 87 SITTIN' ON ACES (1302) AMEN-TEI
CARRIE NATION 64-4054 42 78 0 50 REFORMERS (1095) KURUKAR
TIME SQUARE 65-4637 30 13 0 193 BIG APPLE MENACE (836) DAL SHANG
NED THE JANITOR 66-2973 24 23 0 149 ANDORIAN UNIVERSITY (1123) TARRGIR
TUTANKHAMUN 71-3357 30 18 0 163 CARTOUCHE (1111) KYR'TERR
2 PHAT 72-5064 18 6 1 36 VERMIN (771) DRAGONHEAD
PRIZMATYK WAHL 73-4252 18 9 2 98 MAGIC MAYHEM (1298) ERINIKA
DIRT WORM 82-2315 66 35 0 193 VERMIN!! (1124) DWES EG
KIDNEY 96-972 15 10 3 128 ORGAN ON THE SANDS (1272) OLD VALAMANTIS
FOUNTAINS OF WAYNE 98-809 20 16 4 131 COLLEGE RADIO (1223) SYVYN'S HILL
EVIL ELMO 99-1222 10 1 4 68 TWISTED SESAME (1307) SOUTH RIDGE
NEW TEAMS IN THE TEMPORARY TOURNAMENT ARENAS (DM 81/83)
Please note that all new teams created at the Face-to-Face were temporarily placed
in a temporary Tournament Arena, DM 81 or DM 83. If you requested that your team be
placed in a specific arena, it has already transferred to that arena. Any teams not
transferred out of DM 81 and DM 83 by October 1st will be deleted. If you have
questions about any of your teams, please contact Customer Service. -- RSI
FACE-TO-FACE XXXIV
Our next Winter Face-to-Face will be held on Martin Luther King weekend, Friday
through Sunday, 14-16 January 2005, at the Embassy Suites in Tempe, Arizona (4400 S
Rural Rd--this is the same hotel as last year). Room rates are $139.00 per night,
1-4 occupancy, which includes breakfast. The rooms are blocked. The reservations
number is 480-897-7444; tell them you're with the "Reality Simulations Face to Face
Convention" block. Our room block will be released in mid-December, so please make
sure you reserve your room before then!
Room rates include a full cooked-to-order breakfast and a complimentary two-hour
manager's reception. There is a free shuttle to the airport, as well as free parking.
The hotel is located down the freeway in Tempe. All rooms have high speed internet
(for an extra charge). There is a fitness center, jacuzzi, and pool, and of course a
bar and Mexican restaurant inside the hotel. And there's Denny's right across the
street. Look for transportation info in the tournament information sheet.
The tournament information sheet/strategy sheet should be out sometime in late
November/early December.
If you haven't been to a Face-to-Face before, you're overdue. If you have,
you'll be back. Don't miss this one, it'll be a blast! See you there!
-- Green Eyes and the RSI Staff