AD

Date   : 03/22/2006    Duedate: 04/04/2006

HOME GUARD

DM-101    TURN-424

RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %  RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %
  1 POSSE 77/1362          11    7  0 61.1    7-RAZOR GRACE 67/1327    68   64  0 51.5
  2 TUFT TUGGERS 11/557   343  227  4 60.2    8 LORDS OF VAL 31/1208   34   35  0 49.3
  3 KILLING ME S 96/1367  364  280  1 56.5    9 VORTEX 25/478          85  102  0 45.5
    GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME 99/1306                  WIND STORM 1/649                      
    KILLING ME SOFTER 97/1368                   WIND STORM 42/1365                    
  4-BLADES OF ICE 7/162   374  306  7 55.0      LETHAL HERITAGE 65/550                
    BLADES OF STEEL 17/1068                     ROGUES' GALLERY 67/838                
    BLADES OF MIST 4/780                        LETHAL HERITAGE 78/750                
  5 ALL FINESSE 38/1236   158  145  1 52.1   10 DARKMOON 12/1197       81  103  0 44.0
    BATHTUB ARMADA 7/1196                       SOL INVICTUS 31/1355                  
    LAB EXPERIMENTS 1/1207                      CHAOTICDISORDER 33/1353               
    CLEVER LINGO 46/1212                     11 AVENGERS 31/1321       75  101  0 42.6
    MANNEQUIN'S BEST 1/1227                     MEDIEVAL CHAOS 22/1342                
    SWEET NOTHINGS 82/1366                      PUNCH-OUT! 56/1359                    
    PERFECTION QUEST II 73/1303                 LORDS OF CHAOS 11/1348                
    SECOND BANANAS 47/1363                      AS FAR AS SIAM 40/1323                
    THE BLOODGUARD 2 96/1369                    UNDER JOLLY ROGER 7/1351              
  6 SPARF! 20/1069        781  730 11 51.7   12 VIOLENT FEMS 35/972   424  575  9 42.4
    THE BULLS 73/1144                           JUST BECAUSE 38/1228                  
    HANGOVERS 59/1153                        13 MY PETS 9/554         528  801 15 39.7
    OTTO'S MECHANICS 28/1073                    THE SEUSS HEUSS 24/804                
    NOT QUITE 59/1237                           RHYME TYME 55/449                     
    OPEN SESAME 50/824                          GIRL SCOUT COOKIES 33/812             
    CHAPEL ROCK 79/776                       14 REDHORSE 56/1325      223  343  1 39.4
    PARTY ANIMALS 5/591                         MOSSRUNNERS 1/928                     
    ROYAL FLUSH 47/146                       15 REFORMERS 64/1095     509  835  6 37.9
    DUCKS UNLIMITED 39/1221                     KRILL CAVALRY 24/1364                 
    SKI TAOS 23/1070                            HOMICIDAL MANIACS 1/1082              
    BLOWN AWAY 44/820                           CIRQUE DU MASQUES 58/1093             
    CHAPEL ROCK 59/1352                   

    '##/###' Avoid teams by their Team Id     '-'  Team did not fight this turn

                                 THE GUARDIAN'S FORUM
                       Reflections by the Captain of the Guard

     I eat Mad Docs for breakfast, and any of you who thinks that is a figure of 
speech is welcome to drop by and check it out tomorrow morning.  I eat other things, 
too, and YOU might be on the list.

                                       Kaiden

                             REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER

     Laundry?  Why is there a basket of wet clothes sitting on my desk?  Fripperies 
and laces!  This isn't even MY laundry!  Take it AWAY.  I have to talk about fights.  
I can do that in my sleep, you know, but not if I'm surrounded by wet laundry and in 
danger of getting mildewed.

     So, let's see what we've got here.  Hmm, notes by Debby Tonte.  While I 
appreciated her popping in to cover for me last time, she hadn't better plan on 
making a habit of it, especially not if she comes with laundry.
     Tuft Tuggers were avoided by Chapel Rock, which is apparently full of un-tugged 
tufts and wants to stay that way.
     Desperado of Posse got the most challenges.  Whoopee-do.  Does this mean he can 
open a fast food joint?
     We had forty-one fights, which is good, and TWENTY-TWO challenge matches, which 
is incredible, although I do credit it.  Really!  The numbers are in front of me, and 
seeing is believing.  At least, everyone says so.
     Nobody died.
     Only one standby fought that I noticed.
     The longest match seems to have been fifteen minutes.  That's long enough.

     So, the fights.  First, passing quickly over the random matches.  (If you want 
to be talked about more, issue challenges, or else get challenged.  Forty-one fights 
is too many to comment on everything.)
     KELDON WARLORD (42-2501) (17-10-1,74) of WIND STORM fought MOUNTAIN GOAT (56-
3700) (35-47-3,64) of REDHORSE.  KELDON WARLORD handily defeated MOUNTAIN GOAT in a 1 
minute one-sided match.  Blew that Goat off his mountain.
     FAT BACK (96-1610) (8-5-4,37) of KILLING ME SOFTLY fought ACE METRIC (47-3554) 
(13-8-0,47) of ROYAL FLUSH.  FAT BACK was overpowered by ACE METRIC in a crowd 
pleasing 1 minute one-sided brawl.  Fried.  Delicious.
     PORK ROLL (97-1634) (7-6-5,48) of KILLING ME SOFTER fought BULL DURHAM (5-4324) 
(17-8-0,46) of PARTY ANIMALS.  PORK ROLL was devastated by BULL DURHAM in an action 
packed 1 minute mismatched match.  Party on, Bull!
     CAT IN THE HAT (24-3103) (23-8-1,86) of THE SEUSS HEUSS fought MOOSE (56-3459) 
(25-34-0,88) of REDHORSE.  CAT IN THE HAT was overpowered by MOOSE in an action 
packed 1 minute one-sided fight.  He didn't mean to step on you, Cat, it just 
happened.
     PINE LEAF (24-4580) (25-26-0,88) of KRILL CAVALRY fought KRAMER (47-5191) (17-7-
0,71) of SECOND BANANAS.  PINE LEAF was overpowered by KRAMER in a 1 minute one-sided 
competition.  What comes before a second banana?  Not a first banana, surely?

     SPATHA (31-4996) (29-19-2,75) of SOL INVICTUS fought YAKKO (7-3266) (20-25-0,66) 
of UNDER JOLLY ROGER.  SPATHA unbelievably bested YAKKO in a popular 1 minute 
gruesome bout.  Why does no one believe this?
     WRETCHEDMISERY (33-7255) (20-12-0,59) of CHAOTICDISORDER fought REDDI WHIP (97-
1636) (8-5-6,45) of KILLING ME SOFTER.  WRETCHEDMISERY was subdued by REDDI WHIP in a 
2 minute brutal mismatched match.  Now Wretched is truly miserable.
     HELM HAMMERHAND (31-5025) (30-16-0,131) of LORDS OF VALHALLA fought KID QUICK 
(56-3846) (21-7-2,100) of PUNCH-OUT!  HELM HAMMERHAND devastated KID QUICK in a 
popular 1 minute uneven bout.  Hammered the Kid flat.
     BRANFORD HAWKE (11-5077) (29-29-0,105) of TUFT TUGGERS fought FAST-FINGERS FRED 
(101-7) (0-0-0,110) of the Local Louts 101.  BRANFORD HAWKE bested FAST-FINGERS FRED 
in an exciting 1 minute battle.  Our sole standby match today.  Tough on Fred, but 
that's life on the Isle.
     HUMMINGBIRD (56-3475) (33-38-0,115) of REDHORSE fought LONE WOLF (31-162) (38-
45-1,117) of AVENGERS.  HUMMINGBIRD savagely defeated LONE WOLF in an action packed 1 
minute gory contest.  But the Bird had better watch out, because next time, there'll 
be a pack of wolves.

     LONDON QUIREBOY (59-2513) (21-4-1,130) of CHAPEL ROCK fought RAUNI (31-5035) 
(24-15-0,106) of SOL INVICTUS.  LONDON QUIREBOY was savagely defeated by RAUNI in a 
popular 4 minute gruesome bout.  Some people just don't appreciate music.
     BUCK (1-2291) (47-108-0,105) of MOSSRUNNERS fought BLIND ILLUSION (22-6379) (27-
19-1,145) of MEDIEVAL CHAOS.  BUCK was overpowered by BLIND ILLUSION in a popular 7 
minute gory one-sided match.  Those visual tricks don't work with Blind.
     BATAVIA (78-238) (27-17-0,169) of LETHAL HERITAGE fought JOHN LONGSHORE (11-
4197) (32-43-0,120) of TUFT TUGGERS.  BATAVIA was luckily beaten by JOHN LONGSHORE in 
an action packed 3 minute duel.  Luck?  You actually think this was LUCK, and not a 
firm, wide-ranging grasp of geology?  Little do you know!
     MAD DOC WILLIAMS (77-2432) (33-14-0,196) of POSSE fought OSWALD ORC (101-24) (0-
0-0,181) of the Local Louts 101.  MAD DOC WILLIAMS viciously subdued OSWALD ORC in an 
exciting 6 minute gory duel.  Okay, two standbys today.  So I missed one.  Big deal!
     FIENDISH GLEE (46-1553) (32-21-5,187) of CLEVER LINGO fought SEGALLION SUNDANCER 
(11-4600) (38-27-1,185) of TUFT TUGGERS.  FIENDISH GLEE was beaten by SEGALLION 
SUNDANCER in an exciting 1 minute fray.  And was the Sundancer working with smug 
satisfaction?  Or how about Angelic Innocence?  Team Clever Lingo, please enroll a 
gladiatress named Angelic Innocence!

     R IS FOR REPUGNANT (99-1155) (24-15-4,197) of GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME fought GAZELLE 
(56-3701) (32-26-0,182) of REDHORSE.  R IS FOR REPUGNANT overpowered GAZELLE in a 3 
minute uneven duel.  I don't want to go into what else R is for.
     NUTCRACKER (38-4380) (32-24-1,205) of ALL FINESSE fought ZLATINA ANGUELOVA (11-
4856) (37-33-1,200) of TUFT TUGGERS.  NUTCRACKER vanquished ZLATINA ANGUELOVA in an 
exciting 2 minute one-sided fight.  This is not peanuts.
     KERMORVAN (1-3116) (27-16-0,183) of LAB EXPERIMENTS fought AGLIBOL (12-5848) 
(29-17-0,186) of DARKMOON.  KERMORVAN narrowly defeated AGLIBOL in an exciting 2 
minute gory duel.  How can a defeat be narrow when it takes two minutes?  That may 
not be wide, but it isn't a skinny minute, either.
     HALLIE O'DENE (58-6018) (67-92-0,206) of CIRQUE DU MASQUES fought MOD COD (55-
2638) (76-98-3,203) of RHYME TYME.  HALLIE O'DENE bested MOD COD in an exciting 2 
minute gory bout.  They tell me lemon juice is the key.

     Ah, now the challenge matches, which number more than HALF our not 
inconsiderable total of fights today.  Amazing and delightful.  Keep this up, people.
     IMMOVEABLE OBJECT (59-2110) (22-7-1,70) of NOT QUITE challenged GLASS JOE (56-
3847) (18-10-0,72) of PUNCH-OUT!  Up 2.  IMMOVEABLE OBJECT luckily beat GLASS JOE in 
an action packed 2 minute Challenge fray.  I really do question the operation of luck 
in such a situation.
     CEER (96-1537) (9-4-4,28) of THE BLOODGUARD 2 challenged GAR & BRILL (38-4252) 
(36-65-0,56) of JUST BECAUSE.  Up 28.  CEER lost to GAR & BRILL in a 1 minute 
Challenge match.  Ceer, this is unacceptable.  Get out there next time and clean that 
Gar's greasy brill!
     ACE BAILEY (47-4948) (16-23-0,64) of ROYAL FLUSH challenged HEBEE (38-4359) (15-
10-0,70) of ALL FINESSE.  Up 6.  ACE BAILEY devastated HEBEE in a 1 minute one-sided 
Challenge bout.  And if ANYONE employed finesse in this fight, I couldn't see it from 
the stands.
     DEMONICHELLION (33-7038) (18-16-2,48) of CHAOTICDISORDER challenged TORYN (78-
71) (16-24-2,49) of LETHAL HERITAGE.  Up 1.  DEMONICHELLION overpowered TORYN in a 1 
minute mismatched Challenge fight.  That demonic, hellionish laugh!  It makes a 
standard "bwa-ha-ha" sound... sweet.
     SLIPPERY NIPPLE (59-2323) (21-6-1,93) of HANGOVERS challenged PISTON HURRICANE 
(40-2287) (26-17-0,92) of AS FAR AS SIAM.  Down 1.  SLIPPERY NIPPLE overpowered 
PISTON HURRICANE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge match.  So slippery that the 
Hurricane couldn't lay a piston on it?

     HOCKEY DUCK (39-937) (28-18-1,93) of DUCKS UNLIMITED challenged SKI MASK (58-
5869) (51-89-1,88) of CIRQUE DU MASQUES.  Down 5.  HOCKEY DUCK bested SKI MASK in a 
popular 2 minute Challenge brawl.  Another match between Ducks!  What are they doing 
fighting each other?  Besides proving that Ducks have all our vices of pride and 
other stuff as well as their own marshy piccadillies.
     HUNZICKER BOWL (23-4182) (25-14-1,100) of SKI TAOS challenged BROKEN TOE (56-
3683) (33-53-1,112) of REDHORSE.  Up 12.  HUNZICKER BOWL was handily defeated by 
BROKEN TOE in a 1 minute Challenge bout.  I've heard of people breaking a toe while 
kicking buckets, but not bowls before now.  This might be quite a dish.
     BLACK JACK SHELACK (47-4850) (21-17-1,91) of ROYAL FLUSH challenged SAIONJI (73-
4447) (21-6-1,116) of PERFECTION QUEST II.  Up 25.  BLACK JACK SHELACK overpowered 
SAIONJI in a 1 minute uneven Challenge struggle.  This is what people mean when they 
speak of giving someone a "shellacking."
     DESPERADO (77-2459) (29-15-2,137) of POSSE challenged ROWDY YOBBO (20-3429) (24-
26-1,125) of SPARF!  Down 12.  DESPERADO handily defeated ROWDY YOBBO in a 1 minute 
uneven Challenge fight.  And what can you expect, eh?  Rowdy stepps out onto the 
sands, pauses, turns toward the wall, and enthusicastically sparfs all over the 
place, forgetting, perhaps, that the Arenamaster said "Go."  Talk about your "sitting 
ducks," or was this a "sparfing duck"?
     APPLE JACK (47-4011) (34-27-4,142) of ROYAL FLUSH challenged CROOKED HOOF (56-
3493) (38-28-0,158) of REDHORSE.  Up 16.  APPLE JACK devastated CROOKED HOOF in a 1 
minute mismatched Challenge bout.  It was the appearance of the hoof trimmers that 
turned the tide.

     JOE KING (47-2223) (32-56-1,140) of ROYAL FLUSH challenged KOOKABURRA (33-4151) 
(65-96-4,171) of GIRL SCOUT COOKIES.  Up 31.  JOE KING handily defeated KOOKABURRA in 
a 1 minute one-sided Challenge contest.  Crumbs everywhere!
     CATFISH HUNTER (5-3315) (16-16-1,107) of PARTY ANIMALS challenged KALIDOR THE 
BOLD (11-6441) (21-6-0,112) of TUFT TUGGERS.  Up 5.  CATFISH HUNTER was overpowered 
by KALIDOR THE BOLD in a 1 minute Challenge match.  The Tuft Tuggers are hosting a 
Catfish Fry this weekend.  Seems that was the Hunger's forfeit for losing.
     TENACIOUS (7-5337) (36-16-1,135) of BATHTUB ARMADA challenged BRICK WALL (1-
7478) (32-20-0,121) of HOMICIDAL MANIACS.  Down 14.  TENACIOUS outlasted BRICK WALL 
in a tiring 15 minute Challenge melee.  Our longest fight.  And Tenacious is to be, 
ah, noted.  It isn't everyone who can keep on bashing his head against a brick wall 
for fifteen minutes.  Most people stop sooner.
     OSCAR (50-3153) (32-10-0,120) of OPEN SESAME challenged FEALOST (1-3916) (51-75-
1,124) of MOSSRUNNERS.  Up 4.  OSCAR viciously subdued FEALOST in a 2 minute gory 
Challenge fight.  Been sampling the product, Fealost?
     SEX CAMEL (82-25548) (18-21-4,129) of SWEET NOTHINGS challenged BRIARTHORN (12-
5671) (28-26-1,142) of DARKMOON.  Up 13.  SEX CAMEL was vanquished by BRIARTHORN in a 
1 minute uneven Challenge fight.  All I can say is that I hope the personal to Sex 
Camel is correct, because he is the UGLIEST dude I've ever seen, and remember, I've 
seen Snide Clemens.

     POPE PAUL II (79-1317) (23-17-0,167) of CHAPEL ROCK challenged TICKLES (9-3486) 
(65-88-1,189) of MY PETS.  Up 22.  POPE PAUL II vivaciously subdued TICKLES in an 
action packed 2 minute Challenge melee.  Gods!  I didn't think Paul had that in him!
     ROT TEN EGGS (47-3099) (40-37-0,160) of ROYAL FLUSH challenged CARRIE NATION 
(64-4054) (65-96-0,141) of REFORMERS.  Down 19.  ROT TEN EGGS narrowly defeated 
CARRIE NATION in a 3 minute Challenge brawl.  Again?
     BASE ON BULLS (73-3101) (23-6-4,151) of THE BULLS challenged KI (31-165) (36-45-
1,144) of AVENGERS.  Down 7.  BASE ON BULLS was vanquished by KI in a 1 minute 
mismatched Challenge fight.  Ah.  But Ki had the key, you see.  It works that way.
     PERFECT TEN (47-4218) (32-25-1,167) of ROYAL FLUSH challenged TEDDY RUXPIN (11-
6399) (36-21-1,169) of LORDS OF CHAOS.  Up 2.  PERFECT TEN was savagely defeated by 
TEDDY RUXPIN in a 3 minute Challenge match.  Perfection is not a goal to be sought, 
it would appear.  Or maybe Ten isn't quite so perfect, which makes sense when you 
realize that the REST of the universe perfers base thirteen.
     UZI (44-1701) (30-30-1,182) of BLOWN AWAY challenged SWALLOWTAIL (1-7387) (32-
17-2,185) of MANNEQUIN'S BEST.  Up 3.  UZI was overpowered by SWALLOWTAIL in a 1 
minute mismatched Challenge duel.  This butterfly is not so easily blown away.  
Probably because of being able to shelter behind the Brick Wall.
     FANNY BELT (28-1804) (42-24-1,212) of OTTO'S MECHANICS challenged SINCLAIR (1-
6269) (32-8-3,226) of WIND STORM.  Up 14.  FANNY BELT devastated SINCLAIR in a 1 
minute mismatched Challenge fight.  And when that Fanny swings the belt, well, eyes 
roll, heads spin, and other amazing things happen.

     And for the title:  STEVE MCQUEEN (47-3908) (43-40-1,232) of ROYAL FLUSH 
challenged KAIDEN (35-3108) (107-104-2,223) of VIOLENT FEMS.  Down 9.  STEVE MCQUEEN 
viciously subdued KAIDEN in a 1 minute Challenge Title battle.  Good work, Steve!  
That Kaiden was beginning to get above herself.

     And that's it for today.  I have to do something with this laundry.

                                        Olaf

CAPTAIN OF THE GUARD          W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 STEVE MCQUEEN 47-3908       44  40  1  240  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK

GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS    W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 FANNY BELT 28-1804          43  24  1  234  OTTO'S MECHANICS (1073)    MORYA
 NUTCRACKER 38-4380          33  24  1  220  ALL FINESSE (1236)         CLIFFHOME
-KHEMI 25-2281               41  36  2  214  VORTEX (478)               LYRATILAN
 HALLIE O'DENE 58-6018       68  92  0  212  CIRQUE DU MASQUES (1093)   DELARQ TOR

GRAND CHAMPIONS               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 R IS FOR REPUGNANT 99-1155  25  15  4  207  GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME (1306)  SOUTH RIDGE
-ARAC IRONFIST 67-1944       36  32  0  203  RAZOR GRACE (1327)         BARIKALA
-REDEMPTION 4-4868           34  27  1  203  BLADES OF MIST (780)       JHELUM
 MAD DOC WILLIAMS 77-2432    34  14  0  200  POSSE (1362)               MAZGOURRAH
 MOD COD 55-2638             76  99  3  198  RHYME TYME (449)           KHALANI
 SEGALLION SUNDANCE 11-4600  39  27  1  198  TUFT TUGGERS (557)         ARUAK CITY
 KERMORVAN 1-3116            28  16  0  197  LAB EXPERIMENTS (1207)     MORDANT
 KAIDEN 35-3108             107 105  2  196  VIOLENT FEMS (972)         MURSKA
 SWALLOWTAIL 1-7387          33  17  2  195  MANNEQUIN'S BEST (1227)    MORDANT
 SINCLAIR 1-6269             32   9  3  195  WIND STORM (649)           MORDANT
 ZLATINA ANGUELOVA 11-4856   37  34  1  192  TUFT TUGGERS (557)         ARUAK CITY
 AGLIBOL 12-5848             29  18  0  185  DARKMOON (1197)            RIZTAB
 FIENDISH GLEE 46-1553       32  22  5  184  CLEVER LINGO (1212)        ARDIVENT
 POPE PAUL II 79-1317        24  17  0  184  CHAPEL ROCK (776)          MIROI CHANG

GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS       W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 TEDDY RUXPIN 11-6399        37  21  1  180  LORDS OF CHAOS (1348)      ARUAK CITY
 GAZELLE 56-3701             32  27  0  179  REDHORSE (1325)            ROCANIS
-BONGO 25-2600               26  20  0  179  VORTEX (478)               LYRATILAN
 TICKLES 9-3486              65  89  1  178  MY PETS (554)              ZUKAL
-EXILE 7-4618                33  31  1  177  BLADES OF ICE (162)        BONSUR
 UZI 44-1701                 30  31  1  177  BLOWN AWAY (820)           KRILL
 PERFECT TEN 47-4218         32  26  1  170  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
 KI 31-165                   37  45  1  168  AVENGERS (1321)            CHIMLEVTAL
 JOE KING 47-2223            33  56  1  167  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
 APPLE JACK 47-4011          35  27  4  165  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
 ROT TEN EGGS 47-3099        41  37  0  163  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
-QUEEN AMAZONIA 12-4796      41  54  1  159  DARKMOON (1197)            RIZTAB
 JOHN LONGSHORE 11-4197      33  43  0  158  TUFT TUGGERS (557)         ARUAK CITY
-BECKY 17-5782               24  12  3  153  BLADES OF STEEL (1068)     ALJAFIR

GRAND ADEPTS                  W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
-CARLY 65-2000               33  37  0  150  LETHAL HERITAGE (550)      DAL SHANG
 BRIARTHORN 12-5671          29  26  1  149  DARKMOON (1197)            RIZTAB
 BLIND ILLUSION 22-6379      28  19  1  148  MEDIEVAL CHAOS (1342)      SOLVEN
 KOOKABURRA 33-4151          65  97  4  145  GIRL SCOUT COOKIES (812)   NIATOLI ISLAND
 CARRIE NATION 64-4054       65  97  0  145  REFORMERS (1095)           KURUKAR
 DESPERADO 77-2459           30  15  2  145  POSSE (1362)               MAZGOURRAH
 CROOKED HOOF 56-3493        38  29  0  142  REDHORSE (1325)            ROCANIS
 BATAVIA 78-238              27  18  0  142  LETHAL HERITAGE (750)      LIN TIRIAN
 HELM HAMMERHAND 31-5025     31  16  0  141  LORDS OF VALHALLA (1208)   CHIMLEVTAL
-SHERIDAN 1-6055             28  24  2  140  WIND STORM (649)           MORDANT
 TENACIOUS 7-5337            37  16  1  139  BATHTUB ARMADA (1196)      BONSUR
 BASE ON BULLS 73-3101       23   7  4  137  THE BULLS (1144)           ERINIKA
 RAUNI 31-5035               25  15  0  135  SOL INVICTUS (1355)        CHIMLEVTAL
-AEDON 7-4295                43  34  1  131  BLADES OF ICE (162)        BONSUR
-ZATHRUS 1-5858              31  35  1  131  WIND STORM (649)           MORDANT
 OSCAR 50-3153               33  10  0  128  OPEN SESAME (824)          SNOWBOUND
 BROKEN TOE 56-3683          34  53  1  126  REDHORSE (1325)            ROCANIS
 FEALOST 1-3916              51  76  1  123  MOSSRUNNERS (928)          MORDANT
 SEX CAMEL 82-25548          18  22  4  123  SWEET NOTHINGS (1366)      DWES EG
-KONGOL 7-4524               38  35  2  122  BLADES OF ICE (162)        BONSUR
 HUMMINGBIRD 56-3475         34  38  0  122  REDHORSE (1325)            ROCANIS

GRAND ADEPTS                  W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 BRICK WALL 1-7478           32  21  0  122  HOMICIDAL MANIACS (1082)   MORDANT
 ROWDY YOBBO 20-3429         24  27  1  122  SPARF! (1069)              SEAM
 BLACK JACK SHELACK 47-4850  22  17  1  122  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
 KALIDOR THE BOLD 11-6441    22   6  0  121  TUFT TUGGERS (557)         ARUAK CITY
 LONDON QUIREBOY 59-2513     21   5  1  119  CHAPEL ROCK (1352)         ILLIS
 BRANFORD HAWKE 11-5077      30  29  0  113  TUFT TUGGERS (557)         ARUAK CITY
 LONE WOLF 31-162            38  46  1  111  AVENGERS (1321)            CHIMLEVTAL
 SLIPPERY NIPPLE 59-2323     22   6  1  109  HANGOVERS (1153)           ILLIS
-KHEMRA 78-72                22  14  0  109  LETHAL HERITAGE (750)      LIN TIRIAN
 BUCK 1-2291                 47 109  0  108  MOSSRUNNERS (928)          MORDANT
 CATFISH HUNTER 5-3315       16  17  1  102  PARTY ANIMALS (591)        KALTOS

GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES    W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 MOOSE 56-3459               26  34  0  100  REDHORSE (1325)            ROCANIS
 KID QUICK 56-3846           21   8  2  100  PUNCH-OUT! (1359)          ROCANIS
-BARAK 25-2858               25  24  3   99  VORTEX (478)               LYRATILAN
 HOCKEY DUCK 39-937          29  18  1   98  DUCKS UNLIMITED (1221)     XOCHITHLAN
 SAIONJI 73-4447             21   7  1   94  PERFECTION QUEST II (1303) ERINIKA
 HUNZICKER BOWL 23-4182      25  15  1   93  SKI TAOS (1070)            TI
 KRAMER 47-5191              18   7  0   91  SECOND BANANAS (1363)      NORTH FORK

GRAND INITIATES               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 SKI MASK 58-5869            51  90  1   90  CIRQUE DU MASQUES (1093)   DELARQ TOR
 PISTON HURRICANE 40-2287    26  18  0   86  AS FAR AS SIAM (1323)      ZENSU
-FLAIR 1-6169                22  22  0   82  WIND STORM (649)           MORDANT
 KELDON WARLORD 42-2501      18  10  1   81  WIND STORM (1365)          RODEKI
 IMMOVEABLE OBJECT 59-2110   23   7  1   80  NOT QUITE (1237)           ILLIS
 ACE BAILEY 47-4948          17  23  0   80  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
 SPATHA 31-4996              30  19  2   79  SOL INVICTUS (1355)        CHIMLEVTAL
-WALKER 1-6127               28  18  1   77  WIND STORM (649)           MORDANT
 CAT IN THE HAT 24-3103      23   9  1   77  THE SEUSS HEUSS (804)      ZORPUNT
 GLASS JOE 56-3847           18  11  0   73  PUNCH-OUT! (1359)          ROCANIS
 PINE LEAF 24-4580           25  27  0   72  KRILL CAVALRY (1364)       ZORPUNT
-FARIN 78-503                21  33  2   67  LETHAL HERITAGE (750)      LIN TIRIAN
 YAKKO 7-3266                20  26  0   67  UNDER JOLLY ROGER (1351)   BONSUR
-KROETLAN 78-640             23  20  0   66  LETHAL HERITAGE (750)      LIN TIRIAN
-BARTOFELES 31-5173          17  13  2   66  THE STORMGUARDS (132)      CHIMLEVTAL
-SHADOW 67-725               17  10  0   64  ROGUES' GALLERY (838)      BARIKALA
-NATASHA 78-1937             22  12  2   62  LETHAL HERITAGE (750)      LIN TIRIAN
 REDDI WHIP 97-1636           9   5  6   62  KILLING ME SOFTER (1368)   SHADOW GROVE
 DEMONICHELLION 33-7038      19  16  2   60  CHAOTICDISORDER (1353)     NIATOLI ISLAND
 MOUNTAIN GOAT 56-3700       35  48  3   59  REDHORSE (1325)            ROCANIS
 BULL DURHAM 5-4324          18   8  0   59  PARTY ANIMALS (591)        KALTOS
 GAR & BRILL 38-4252         37  65  0   58  JUST BECAUSE (1228)        CLIFFHOME
 HEBEE 38-4359               15  11  0   57  ALL FINESSE (1236)         CLIFFHOME
 ACE METRIC 47-3554          14   8  0   57  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
 WRETCHEDMISERY 33-7255      20  13  0   49  CHAOTICDISORDER (1353)     NIATOLI ISLAND
 PORK ROLL 97-1634            7   7  5   40  KILLING ME SOFTER (1368)   SHADOW GROVE
 TORYN 78-71                 16  25  2   39  LETHAL HERITAGE (750)      LIN TIRIAN
-KENNY 78-1940               14  12  0   32  LETHAL HERITAGE (750)      LIN TIRIAN
 FAT BACK 96-1610             8   6  4   32  KILLING ME SOFTLY (1367)   OLD VALAMANTIS
 CEER 96-1537                 9   5  4   30  THE BLOODGUARD 2 (1369)    OLD VALAMANTIS

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                    W   L  K TEAM NAME              SLAIN BY              TURN

                               PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE

Nutcracker -- What did you think you were trying to hit?  You were all over the 
board, girl!  Focus! -- Gazelle

Joe King -- Sorry about the groin hit.  I didn't mean to humble you THAT much, you 
being a king and all. -- Crooked Hoof

Sex Camel -- I suppose your name means that you can go a long time between...  Oh 
well. -- Buck

Apple Jack -- Judging by your name, you're on the wrong team.  Were the Bad Apples 
not recruiting when you were ready to join? -- Hummingbird

Blackjack Shelack -- Thought you were gonna beat me, eh, just because you've got more 
wins than losses?  Well... good try, actually.  Maybe next time -- Broken Toe

Bull Durham -- That was a brave challenge.  I'm sorry I didn't teach you something.
-- Mountain Goat

Briarthorn -- "You're supposed to swing with it"?  I know you're better with YOUR 
weapon, but I don't think you understand mine.  I suppose I COULD swing my short 
spear.  But I'm not trained as a basher and I'm likely to do even worse trying to use 
my weapon that way. -- Fealost

Shadow -- From your record, and from some of your moves during our fight, I can tell 
you're good.  Still, it's tough to beat someone with twice your fights.  Good try 
though. -- Moose

John Longshore -- We all hope you're feeling better now.  You can see that our whole 
guild signed your "get alive soon" card.  I've heard that the resurrection hangover 
is pretty awful. -- Phetmolge, speaking for Redhorse/Mossrunners

Tankesh -- The merry-go-round beer mug brawl will be next turn. -- Phetmolge (because 
Phetmolge's writer is in the middle of moving, sorry)

Rot Ten Eggs -- I thank all the gods, if, of course, there are any gods and they have 
any power in such a matter, which is debateable, that you are a neuter golem and so 
cannot breed.  More like you would be insupportable.  The smell!  Phaugh! -- Carrie 
Nation

Hockey Duck -- Well, it's an un-Drakely style you have chosen, but I salute you.  
Yes, I do!  You have chosen to show these pestiferous mammals that anything THEY can 
do, WE can do better.  Well done. -- Ski Mask
P.S.  But a little more respect to a fellow Duck would be proper.

Bongo -- Never say I can't take a hint, for I have beaten you like a drum.  Bing, 
bong, bang.  Believe or believe me not, but this is good for you. -- Hallie O'Dene

Base on Bulls -- I have been instructed to tell you that your behavior was "unplumb," 
whatever that means.  I think what it means is that the Brick Wall wanted to win, in 
so far as a wall can "want" something.  There's something about being freshly tuck-
pointed so as to present a good appearance for a butterfly, too, but what do 
butterflies care for walls?  I thought they were all focused on milkweeds.  Oh, well. 
-- Hallie O'Dene, not sure how she got stuck with being a psychic channel

Natasha -- Think of it as "introducing you by easy stages."  Life and fighting on the 
Isle are NOT quite like doing it back home.  Good luck.  You're going to need it. -- 
Pine Leaf

Debbie Tonte -- I resent your description of our Duckish Doctors as "quacks."  This 
is untrue, but SO like a mammal.  Speciesist belittlers, every one of you. -- Ski 
Mask, Founder and President of Ducks With Swords

Phetmolge -- I don't know that I'd call it "managing," but I'm in charge of paying 
the bills and taking out the garbage at the guildhouse. -- Ho-Chan the Axe

Immoveable Object -- No, actually I just wanted to give the artist in the stands time 
to finish his sketch of me in action. -- Pine Leaf

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

FANNY BELT devastated SINCLAIR in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge fight.
STEVE MCQUEEN viciously subdued KAIDEN in a 1 minute Challenge Title battle.
UZI was overpowered by SWALLOWTAIL in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge duel.
PERFECT TEN was savagely defeated by TEDDY RUXPIN in a 3 minute Challenge match.
BASE ON BULLS was vanquished by KI in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge fight.
ROT TEN EGGS narrowly defeated CARRIE NATION in a 3 minute Challenge brawl.
POPE PAUL II viciously subdued TICKLES in a action packed 2 minute Challenge melee.
SEX CAMEL was vanquished by BRIARTHORN in a 1 minute uneven Challenge fight.
OSCAR viciously subdued FEALOST in a 2 minute gory Challenge fight.
TENACIOUS outlasted BRICK WALL in a tiring 15 minute Challenge melee.
CATFISH HUNTER was overpowered by KALIDOR THE BOLD in a 1 minute Challenge match.
JOE KING handily defeated KOOKABURRA in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge contest.
APPLE JACK devastated CROOKED HOOF in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge bout.
DESPERADO handily defeated ROWDY YOBBO in a 1 minute uneven Challenge fight.
BLACK JACK SHELACK overpowered SAIONJI in a 1 minute uneven Challenge struggle.
HUNZICKER BOWL was handily defeated by BROKEN TOE in a 1 minute Challenge bout.
HOCKEY DUCK bested SKI MASK in a popular 2 minute Challenge brawl.
SLIPPERY NIPPLE overpowered PISTON HURRICANE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge match.
DEMONICHELLION overpowered TORYN in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge fight.
ACE BAILEY devastated HEBEE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge bout.
CEER lost to GAR & BRILL in a 1 minute Challenge match.
IMMOVEABLE OBJECT luckily beat GLASS JOE in a action packed 2 minute Challenge fray.
HALLIE O'DENE bested MOD COD in a exciting 2 minute gory bout.
KERMORVAN narrowly defeated AGLIBOL in a exciting 2 minute gory duel.
NUTCRACKER vanquished ZLATINA ANGUELOVA in a exciting 2 minute one-sided fight.
R IS FOR REPUGNANT overpowered GAZELLE in a 3 minute uneven duel.
FIENDISH GLEE was beaten by SEGALLION SUNDANCER in a exciting 1 minute fray.
MAD DOC WILLIAMS viciously subdued OSWALD ORC in a exciting 6 minute gory duel.
BATAVIA was luckily beaten by JOHN LONGSHORE in a action packed 3 minute duel.
BUCK was overpowered by BLIND ILLUSION in a popular 7 minute gory one-sided match.
LONDON QUIREBOY was savagely defeated by RAUNI in a popular 4 minute gruesome bout.
HUMMINGBIRD savagely defeated LONE WOLF in a action packed 1 minute gory contest.
BRANFORD HAWKE bested FAST-FINGERS FRED in a exciting 1 minute battle.
HELM HAMMERHAND devastated KID QUICK in a popular 1 minute uneven bout.
WRETCHEDMISERY was subdued by REDDI WHIP in a 2 minute brutal mismatched match.
SPATHA unbelievably bested YAKKO in a popular 1 minute gruesome bout.
PINE LEAF was overpowered by KRAMER in a 1 minute one-sided competition.
CAT IN THE HAT was overpowered by MOOSE in a action packed 1 minute one-sided fight.
PORK ROLL was devastated by BULL DURHAM in a action packed 1 minute mismatched match.
FAT BACK was overpowered by ACE METRIC in a crowd pleasing 1 minute one-sided brawl.
KELDON WARLORD handily defeated MOUNTAIN GOAT in a 1 minute one-sided match.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                  16         PARRY-STRIKE      13 -   3 -  0      81  |
|WALL OF STEEL                   12         PARRY-RIPOSTE     22 -  11 -  0      67  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                 11         WALL OF STEEL     54 -  33 -  1      62  |
|AIMED BLOW                       9         AIMED BLOW        42 -  34 -  0      55  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  8         SLASHING ATTACK   37 -  34 -  0      52  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      8         PARRY-LUNGE       11 -  11 -  0      50  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   6         TOTAL PARRY       29 -  32 -  0      48  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    4         STRIKING ATTACK   47 -  57 -  0      45  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      3         LUNGING ATTACK    60 -  73 -  0      45  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     3         BASHING ATTACK    22 -  51 -  2      30  |

Turn 424 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-RIPOSTE      4 -  0     STRIKING ATTACK    4 -  7         4  AIMED BLOW     
AIMED BLOW         7 -  2     BASHING ATTACK     2 -  4         2  TOTAL PARRY    
PARRY-LUNGE        2 -  1     LUNGING ATTACK     3 - 13         2  STRIKING ATTACK
PARRY-STRIKE       2 -  1                                       1  SLASHING ATTACK
SLASHING ATTACK    5 -  3                                       1  LUNGING ATTACK 
TOTAL PARRY        5 -  3                                       1  PARRY-LUNGE    
WALL OF STEEL      7 -  5     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
AIMED BLOW       STEVE MCQUEEN 47-3908      44  40  1  240 ROYAL FLUSH (146)
TOTAL PARRY      FANNY BELT 28-1804         43  24  1  234 OTTO'S MECHANICS (1073)
LUNGING ATTACK   MOD COD 55-2638            76  99  3  198 RHYME TYME (449)
PARRY-LUNGE      SEGALLION SUNDANC 11-4600  39  27  1  198 TUFT TUGGERS (557)
WALL OF STEEL    KERMORVAN 1-3116           28  16  0  197 LAB EXPERIMENTS (1207)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    SWALLOWTAIL 1-7387         33  17  2  195 MANNEQUIN'S BEST (1227)
STRIKING ATTACK  SINCLAIR 1-6269            32   9  3  195 WIND STORM (649)
PARRY-STRIKE     TEDDY RUXPIN 11-6399       37  21  1  180 LORDS OF CHAOS (1348)
BASHING ATTACK   TICKLES 9-3486             65  89  1  178 MY PETS (554)
SLASHING ATTACK  DESPERADO 77-2459          30  15  2  145 POSSE (1362)

The overall popularity leader is KAIDEN 35-3108.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was BLIND ILLUSION 22-6379.  The ten other most popular fighters were NUTCRACKER 
38-4380, CARRIE NATION 64-4054, MAD DOC WILLIAMS 77-2432, TEDDY RUXPIN 11-6399, 
TICKLES 9-3486, GLASS JOE 56-3847, RAUNI 31-5035, ROT TEN EGGS 47-3099, BATAVIA 
78-238, and PERFECT TEN 47-4218.

The least popular fighter this week was BRICK WALL 1-7478.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were TENACIOUS 7-5337, MOUNTAIN GOAT 56-3700, PINE LEAF 24-4580, 
PISTON HURRICANE 40-2287, HUNZICKER BOWL 23-4182, SAIONJI 73-4447, ROWDY YOBBO 
20-3429, CROOKED HOOF 56-3493, SEX CAMEL 82-25548, and BASE ON BULLS 73-3101.

Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  
MORDANT(1)           2  4 0  NIATOLI ISLAND(33)   1  2 0  DELARQ TOR(58)       1  1 0  
KALTOS(5)            1  1 0  MURSKA(35)           0  1 0  ILLIS(59)            2  1 0  
BONSUR(7)            1  1 0  CLIFFHOME(38)        2  1 0  KURUKAR(64)          0  1 0  
ZUKAL(9)             0  1 0  XOCHITHLAN(39)       1  0 0  ERINIKA(73)          0  2 0  
ARUAK CITY(11)       5  1 0  ZENSU(40)            0  1 0  MAZGOURRAH(77)       2  0 0  
RIZTAB(12)           1  1 0  RODEKI(42)           1  0 0  LIN TIRIAN(78)       0  2 0  
SEAM(20)             0  1 0  KRILL(44)            0  1 0  MIROI CHANG(79)      1  0 0  
SOLVEN(22)           1  0 0  ARDIVENT(46)         0  1 0  DWES EG(82)          0  1 0  
TI(23)               0  1 0  NORTH FORK(47)       8  1 0  OLD VALAMANTIS(96)   0  2 0  
ZORPUNT(24)          0  2 0  SNOWBOUND(50)        1  0 0  SHADOW GROVE(97)     1  1 0  
MORYA(28)            1  0 0  KHALANI(55)          0  1 0  SOUTH RIDGE(99)      1  0 0  
CHIMLEVTAL(31)       4  1 0  ROCANIS(56)          3  5 0  

TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 KERMORVAN 1-3116            28  16  0  197  LAB EXPERIMENTS (1207)     MORDANT
 CATFISH HUNTER 5-3315       16  17  1  102  PARTY ANIMALS (591)        KALTOS
 TENACIOUS 7-5337            37  16  1  139  BATHTUB ARMADA (1196)      BONSUR
 TICKLES 9-3486              65  89  1  178  MY PETS (554)              ZUKAL
 SEGALLION SUNDANCE 11-4600  39  27  1  198  TUFT TUGGERS (557)         ARUAK CITY
 AGLIBOL 12-5848             29  18  0  185  DARKMOON (1197)            RIZTAB
 ROWDY YOBBO 20-3429         24  27  1  122  SPARF! (1069)              SEAM
 BLIND ILLUSION 22-6379      28  19  1  148  MEDIEVAL CHAOS (1342)      SOLVEN
 HUNZICKER BOWL 23-4182      25  15  1   93  SKI TAOS (1070)            TI
 CAT IN THE HAT 24-3103      23   9  1   77  THE SEUSS HEUSS (804)      ZORPUNT
 FANNY BELT 28-1804          43  24  1  234  OTTO'S MECHANICS (1073)    MORYA
 KI 31-165                   37  45  1  168  AVENGERS (1321)            CHIMLEVTAL
 KOOKABURRA 33-4151          65  97  4  145  GIRL SCOUT COOKIES (812)   NIATOLI ISLAND
 KAIDEN 35-3108             107 105  2  196  VIOLENT FEMS (972)         MURSKA
 NUTCRACKER 38-4380          33  24  1  220  ALL FINESSE (1236)         CLIFFHOME
 HOCKEY DUCK 39-937          29  18  1   98  DUCKS UNLIMITED (1221)     XOCHITHLAN
 PISTON HURRICANE 40-2287    26  18  0   86  AS FAR AS SIAM (1323)      ZENSU
 KELDON WARLORD 42-2501      18  10  1   81  WIND STORM (1365)          RODEKI
 UZI 44-1701                 30  31  1  177  BLOWN AWAY (820)           KRILL
 FIENDISH GLEE 46-1553       32  22  5  184  CLEVER LINGO (1212)        ARDIVENT
 STEVE MCQUEEN 47-3908       44  40  1  240  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
 OSCAR 50-3153               33  10  0  128  OPEN SESAME (824)          SNOWBOUND
 MOD COD 55-2638             76  99  3  198  RHYME TYME (449)           KHALANI
 GAZELLE 56-3701             32  27  0  179  REDHORSE (1325)            ROCANIS
 HALLIE O'DENE 58-6018       68  92  0  212  CIRQUE DU MASQUES (1093)   DELARQ TOR
 LONDON QUIREBOY 59-2513     21   5  1  119  CHAPEL ROCK (1352)         ILLIS
 CARRIE NATION 64-4054       65  97  0  145  REFORMERS (1095)           KURUKAR
 BASE ON BULLS 73-3101       23   7  4  137  THE BULLS (1144)           ERINIKA
 MAD DOC WILLIAMS 77-2432    34  14  0  200  POSSE (1362)               MAZGOURRAH
 BATAVIA 78-238              27  18  0  142  LETHAL HERITAGE (750)      LIN TIRIAN
 POPE PAUL II 79-1317        24  17  0  184  CHAPEL ROCK (776)          MIROI CHANG
 SEX CAMEL 82-25548          18  22  4  123  SWEET NOTHINGS (1366)      DWES EG
 FAT BACK 96-1610             8   6  4   32  KILLING ME SOFTLY (1367)   OLD VALAMANTIS
 REDDI WHIP 97-1636           9   5  6   62  KILLING ME SOFTER (1368)   SHADOW GROVE
 R IS FOR REPUGNANT 99-1155  25  15  4  207  GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME (1306)  SOUTH RIDGE