AD
Date : 12/26/2007 Duedate: 01/08/2008
HOME GUARD
DM-101 TURN-470
RANK TEAMS W L K % RANK TEAMS W L K %
1 STREET PIZZA 18/173 536 433 3 55.3 GERFEL'S FRIENDS 11/516
WHY SELL THIS? 97/1391 5 ALL FINESSE 38/1236 279 264 2 51.4
WHY SELL THIS? 96/1390 BATHTUB ARMADA 7/1196
DEAD PRESIDENTS, YO 99/1412 NO RESPECT II 82/1399
BLOODY RANDOMNESS 96/1405 SUGAR AND SPICE 7/1231
2-THE FAMILY T 20/1417 61 50 1 55.0 THE INANIMATES 73/1361
3 SKI TAOS 23/1070 911 826 13 52.4 6-SEA DOGS 7/1416 23 22 0 51.1
OPEN SESAME 50/824 7 THE STORMGUAR 31/132 146 165 2 46.9
PARTY ANIMALS 5/591 8 JUST BECAUSE 38/1228 449 599 9 42.8
CHAPEL ROCK 59/1352 9 RHYME TYME 55/449 613 868 15 41.4
AVID FANS 45/569 THE SEUSS HEUSS 24/804
ROYAL FLUSH 47/146 10 CHILDREN OF 35/1415 593 955 6 38.3
4 THE GOOD EAR 82/1420 184 172 2 51.7 11 KLK RANGE HA 42/1408 4 14 0 22.2
THE FURIOUS FIVE 46/1121 AIM 4 ISLE HAMMERZ 17/1414
'##/###' Avoid teams by their Team Id '-' Team did not fight this turn
REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER
I figure it must be the weather, or else the upcoming tourney and a lot of
managers worried about getting their advanced gladiators caught on the wrong side of
the freeze. Either way, it's pathetic. You can do better than this! No need to get
the bookies all sneering at us for being the no-show arena. Leave that for Andorak.
Well, no more putting it off. We had sixteen fights. One challenge match, and
guess who got the most challenges, eh? That one match was IT: to Tavis Cadfalson.
Open Sesame did the most avoiding--TWO avoids issued, more or less aiming to stay
away from Gerfel's Friends. Some hidden history here?
As far as I could tell from a quick skim through the notes: sixteen fights, one
standby, one challenge, no deaths.
AIM SEDUCE HAMMER (17-6815) (22-6-1,60) of AIM 4 ISLE HAMMERZ fought BLOODY
BRAINLESS (96-2206) (12-13-3,61) of BLOODY RANDOMNESS. AIM SEDUCE HAMMER was handily
defeated by BLOODY BRAINLESS in a 1 minute bout. They say that gladiators don't need
brains, and this may support that opinion. But I wonder if the Infirmary surgeons
can confirm the complete absence of a brain there?
JAMES MADISON (99-1268) (10-5-3,66) of DEAD PRESIDENTS, YO fought HERMY (101-4)
(0-0-0,50) of the Louts Local 101. JAMES MADISON was overpowered by HERMY in a 1
minute uneven struggle. Our only standby, and J. Madison was a perfect gent about
it, allowing her the win. Thanks, Jimmy, it makes her a lot easier to get along
with.
HUW AP HUW (35-3030) (20-42-0,82) of CHILDREN OF LLYR fought JOHN WAYNE HAMMER
(42-4213) (17-26-2,70) of KLK RANGE HAMMERZ. HUW AP HUW was handily defeated by JOHN
WAYNE HAMMER in a 1 minute one-sided conflict. I hear that Huw tried to defend
himself with a white hat, but it didn't work for him. Got to be a blood red path
very quickly.
VANISH (73-4633) (20-6-1,95) of THE INANIMATES fought HARLEY THE CADAVER (18-
5366) (27-52-3,59) of STREET PIZZA. VANISH was savagely defeated by HARLEY THE
CADAVER in a crowd pleasing 3 minute match. A fascinating struggle: Vanish kept
trying to, and Harley kept pulling is decayed remains together and tracking down his
opponent. A bit gross, but fascinating.
MATH OP OWAIN (35-1418) (37-78-1,133) of CHILDREN OF LLYR fought SUGARBEET (7-
5219) (32-32-1,96) of SUGAR AND SPICE. MATH OP OWAIN savagely defeated SUGARBEET in
a crowd pleasing 2 minute competition. This is a man totally without a sweet tooth.
Or maybe it's a root tooth that he lacks, although he apparently has tooth roots.
OWAIN HARLSON (35-3130) (25-30-1,133) of CHILDREN OF LLYR fought BLOOD PIE (96-
1918) (17-19-5,149) of WHY SELL THIS? OWAIN HARLSON was overpowered by BLOOD PIE in
a 1 minute one-sided fight. And not only overpowered, he assures me that he is also
totally grossed out. Natural enough, who wouldn't be? Even Blood Pie's manager was
grossed out.
HUNZICKER BOWL (23-4182) (37-19-1,137) of SKI TAOS fought SCRAPPLE (97-1961)
(19-17-3,100) of WHY SELL THIS? HUNZICKER BOWL was luckily beaten by SCRAPPLE in an
action packed 2 minute match. This is not luck, this is the power of a good bowl.
People don't realize how much power there is in pottery!
ACE METRIC (47-3554) (23-15-0,172) of ROYAL FLUSH fought PUMPING ON STEELE (82-
33221) (17-16-0,106) of NO RESPECT II. ACE METRIC defeated PUMPING ON STEELE in an
action packed 2 minute gory duel. I look at this fight, and I just have to shake my
head. Why? Because I'm not sure what possibly tangental comment I can make here,
and that's an affront to my amore proper.
BLACK EYES (46-2820) (27-21-0,165) of THE FURIOUS FIVE fought HEBEE (38-4359)
(28-36-0,122) of ALL FINESSE. BLACK EYES vanquished HEBEE in a 1 minute uneven duel.
Fast work, but hey, Black Eyes had a date. Some days there just isn't time to dawdle
on the sands.
UNZOE THE SHAMAN (31-4940) (26-12-0,155) of THE STORMGUARDS fought GAR & BRILL
(38-4252) (60-87-0,146) of JUST BECAUSE. UNZOE THE SHAMAN defeated GAR & BRILL in an
action packed 2 minute melee. Good, I'm getting tired of that old Gar & Brill.
Demolish it.
BULL DURHAM (5-4324) (29-15-1,155) of PARTY ANIMALS fought CADAL (35-1370) (42-
83-4,132) of CHILDREN OF LLYR. BULL DURHAM devastated CADAL in a crowd pleasing 1
minute mismatched match. Ah, does this mean that Cadal isn't a party animal? Can't
hold his liquor, maybe, although it seems to me that a lot of those party animals
have similar problems.
OSCAR (50-3153) (39-15-0,197) of OPEN SESAME fought MOD COD (55-2638) (96-124-
3,209) of RHYME TYME. OSCAR was viciously subdued by MOD COD in an action packed 1
minute gory brawl. Damn, flattened by the flounder, clobbered by the cod. Don't
open next time, Oscar.
TENACIOUS (7-5337) (58-32-1,200) of BATHTUB ARMADA fought DON KING (47-5374)
(23-18-2,159) of ROYAL FLUSH. TENACIOUS unbelievably bested DON KING in a popular 10
minute brutal fight. Hey, I believe this! Totally.
STREET RAT (11-3116) (36-32-2,186) of GERFEL'S FRIENDS fought HEAD CHEESE (96-
1920) (24-12-3,155) of WHY SELL THIS? STREET RAT defeated HEAD CHEESE in a crowd
pleasing 2 minute duel. Well, no wonder. Rats eat anything. Everyone knows that.
Our lone challenge fight: THE SINGING BANDIT (11-6349) (29-36-0,100) of
GERFEL'S FRIENDS challenged TAVIS CADFALSON (35-1419) (32-83-2,125) of CHILDREN OF
LLYR. Up 25. THE SINGING BANDIT bested TAVIS CADFALSON in a 2 minute Challenge
fight. I guess this means Tavis does not get included in the barbershop quartet?
And for the title: CAT IN THE HAT (24-3103) (56-21-1,243) of THE SEUSS HEUSS
fought LONDON QUIREBOY (59-2513) (27-9-1,201) of CHAPEL ROCK. CAT IN THE HAT
viciously subdued LONDON QUIREBOY in a 3 minute Title battle. Just a little, well,
tedious? We knew the Cat was vicious, we knew the Quireboy was a polite, mannerly
youth, what else could we have expected?
Olaf
CAPTAIN OF THE GUARD W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
CAT IN THE HAT 24-3103 57 21 1 260 THE SEUSS HEUSS (804) ZORPUNT
GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
MOD COD 55-2638 97 124 3 228 RHYME TYME (449) KHALANI
GRAND CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
LONDON QUIREBOY 59-2513 27 10 1 207 CHAPEL ROCK (1352) ILLIS
GRAND CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
TENACIOUS 7-5337 59 32 1 202 BATHTUB ARMADA (1196) BONSUR
OSCAR 50-3153 39 16 0 193 OPEN SESAME (824) SNOWBOUND
STREET RAT 11-3116 37 32 2 192 GERFEL'S FRIENDS (516) ARUAK CITY
GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
ACE METRIC 47-3554 24 15 0 174 ROYAL FLUSH (146) NORTH FORK
DON KING 47-5374 23 19 2 174 ROYAL FLUSH (146) NORTH FORK
BLACK EYES 46-2820 28 21 0 167 THE FURIOUS FIVE (1121) ARDIVENT
BULL DURHAM 5-4324 30 15 1 160 PARTY ANIMALS (591) KALTOS
UNZOE THE SHAMAN 31-4940 27 12 0 159 THE STORMGUARDS (132) CHIMLEVTAL
HEAD CHEESE 96-1920 24 13 3 159 WHY SELL THIS? (1390) OLD VALAMANTIS
BLOOD PIE 96-1918 18 19 5 155 WHY SELL THIS? (1390) OLD VALAMANTIS
GRAND ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
GAR & BRILL 38-4252 60 88 0 150 JUST BECAUSE (1228) CLIFFHOME
-A GROUNDSKEEPER 45-1613 33 28 1 144 AVID FANS (569) STORMCROWE
MATH OP OWAIN 35-1418 38 78 1 135 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415) MURSKA
SCRAPPLE 97-1961 20 17 3 134 WHY SELL THIS? (1391) SHADOW GROVE
CADAL 35-1370 42 84 4 132 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415) MURSKA
OWAIN HARLSON 35-3130 25 31 1 127 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415) MURSKA
HEBEE 38-4359 28 37 0 125 ALL FINESSE (1236) CLIFFHOME
PUMPING ON STEEL 82--32315 17 17 0 120 NO RESPECT II (1399) DWES EG
THE SINGING BANDIT 11-6349 30 36 0 119 GERFEL'S FRIENDS (516) ARUAK CITY
HUNZICKER BOWL 23-4182 37 20 1 117 SKI TAOS (1070) TI
TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419 32 84 2 110 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415) MURSKA
GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
SUGARBEET 7-5219 32 33 1 100 SUGAR AND SPICE (1231) BONSUR
HARLEY THE CADAVER 18-5366 28 52 3 92 STREET PIZZA (173) TALCAMA
GRAND INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
JOHN WAYNE HAMMER 42-4213 18 26 2 87 KLK RANGE HAMMERZ (1408) RODEKI
BLOODY BRAINLESS 96-2206 13 13 3 79 BLOODY RANDOMNESS (1405) OLD VALAMANTIS
VANISH 73-4633 20 7 1 75 THE INANIMATES (1361) ERINIKA
HUW AP HUW 35-3030 20 43 0 66 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415) MURSKA
-ULTHAR UTHERYDES 31-5682 15 6 0 51 THE STORMGUARDS (132) CHIMLEVTAL
AIM SEDUCE HAMMER 17-6815 22 7 1 50 AIM 4 ISLE HAMMERZ (1414) ALJAFIR
JAMES MADISON 99-1268 10 6 3 48 DEAD PRESIDENTS, YO (1412) SOUTH RIDGE
'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.
THE DEAD W L K TEAM NAME SLAIN BY TURN
PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE
Pumping on Steele -- That seems rude and lacking in respect. One such as myself,
with more experience of the world than perhaps you have, realizes that this could be
a very bad plan. If you show no respect to others, they are unlikely to show respect
to you, after all. And there are times when it makes a difference. Respect CAN get
you into trouble now and then, because people expect more from you, but a lack of
respect is SURE to get you into trouble, because people see no reason to treat you as
worthy of anything but a quick knife in the back. Er, you might move in circles
where that knife in the back is figurative, but I can assure you that it's just as
dangerous. Trust me on this, I know whereof I speak. -- Math op Owain
Hebee -- Huh, you've got no respect, either. Think I'm easy? Fat chance. I may not
be a godling, but I'm sneaky. -- Owain Harlson
P.S. What kind of name is "Hebee" for a guy? Or a woman either, but women are weird
that way sometimes.
Sugarbeet -- Ah, well, I never did care much for beets, sugar or salt. You know how
it is. They're food for the cows and the pigs. The only time people eat those roots
is when they've already eaten the cows and the pigs and there's nothing left. --
Tavis Cadfalson
Unzoe the Shaman -- That was by way of being a relief. Here we had three wins in a
row, this is not normal and is likely to lead to us getting ejected at the next
Split. NOT part of the Plan. We want to stay here for the long haul. Get
comfortable. Bring back the concept of Home Guard for the old puds, not these young
hotshots that pop in to skim off some skills and then head off to Primus. Impatient,
the lot of them. I don't know what the younger generation is going to come to. --
Cadal
The Singing Bandit -- And a good voice, too. I like the guitar riffs. Erm, listen,
ah, well, do you do parties? We're thinking of having one, sort of a guildhouse
warming, and some music would be good. Free beer? -- Huw ap Huw
Olaf -- Why would anyone want to carry a tune in a bucket? Doesn't make sense to me.
-- Huw
LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS
THE SINGING BANDIT bested TAVIS CADFALSON in a 2 minute Challenge fight.
CAT IN THE HAT viciously subdued LONDON QUIREBOY in a 3 minute Title battle.
STREET RAT defeated HEAD CHEESE in a crowd pleasing 2 minute duel.
TENACIOUS unbelievably bested DON KING in a popular 10 minute brutal fight.
OSCAR was viciously subdued by MOD COD in a action packed 1 minute gory brawl.
BULL DURHAM devastated CADAL in a crowd pleasing 1 minute mismatched match.
UNZOE THE SHAMAN defeated GAR & BRILL in a action packed 2 minute melee.
BLACK EYES vanquished HEBEE in a 1 minute uneven duel.
ACE METRIC defeated PUMPING ON STEELE in a action packed 2 minute gory duel.
HUNZICKER BOWL was luckily beaten by SCRAPPLE in a action packed 2 minute match.
OWAIN HARLSON was overpowered by BLOOD PIE in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
MATH OP OWAIN savagely defeated SUGARBEET in a crowd pleasing 2 minute competition.
VANISH was savagely defeated by HARLEY THE CADAVER in a crowd pleasing 3 minute match.
HUW AP HUW was handily defeated by JOHN WAYNE HAMMER in a 1 minute one-sided conflict.
JAMES MADISON was overpowered by HERMY in a 1 minute uneven struggle.
AIM SEDUCE HAMMER was handily defeated by BLOODY BRAINLESS in a 1 minute bout.
BATTLE REPORT
MOST POPULAR RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS
|FIGHTING STYLE FIGHTS FIGHTING STYLE W - L - K PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK 6 PARRY-LUNGE 13 - 6 - 0 68 |
|STRIKING ATTACK 6 LUNGING ATTACK 46 - 29 - 2 61 |
|AIMED BLOW 5 SLASHING ATTACK 17 - 12 - 0 59 |
|PARRY-STRIKE 4 WALL OF STEEL 27 - 20 - 0 57 |
|BASHING ATTACK 3 STRIKING ATTACK 32 - 42 - 2 43 |
|WALL OF STEEL 3 AIMED BLOW 22 - 29 - 0 43 |
|TOTAL PARRY 2 PARRY-STRIKE 9 - 13 - 0 41 |
|PARRY-LUNGE 1 TOTAL PARRY 16 - 26 - 0 38 |
|SLASHING ATTACK 1 BASHING ATTACK 7 - 13 - 0 35 |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 - 0 - 0 0 |
Turn 470 was great if you Not so great if you used The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles: the fighting styles: top eleven warriors are:
PARRY-LUNGE 1 - 0 PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 - 0 3 STRIKING ATTACK
SLASHING ATTACK 1 - 0 BASHING ATTACK 0 - 3 2 LUNGING ATTACK
AIMED BLOW 4 - 1 WALL OF STEEL 0 - 3 2 WALL OF STEEL
PARRY-STRIKE 2 - 2 1 TOTAL PARRY
LUNGING ATTACK 3 - 3 1 SLASHING ATTACK
STRIKING ATTACK 3 - 3 1 AIMED BLOW
TOTAL PARRY 1 - 1 1 PARRY-STRIKE
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE
FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME
STRIKING ATTACK CAT IN THE HAT 24-3103 57 21 1 260 THE SEUSS HEUSS (804)
LUNGING ATTACK MOD COD 55-2638 97 124 3 228 RHYME TYME (449)
WALL OF STEEL LONDON QUIREBOY 59-2513 27 10 1 207 CHAPEL ROCK (1352)
TOTAL PARRY TENACIOUS 7-5337 59 32 1 202 BATHTUB ARMADA (1196)
SLASHING ATTACK ACE METRIC 47-3554 24 15 0 174 ROYAL FLUSH (146)
AIMED BLOW BLACK EYES 46-2820 28 21 0 167 THE FURIOUS FIVE (1121)
PARRY-STRIKE UNZOE THE SHAMAN 31-4940 27 12 0 159 THE STORMGUARDS (132)
PARRY-LUNGE SCRAPPLE 97-1961 20 17 3 134 WHY SELL THIS? (1391)
BASHING ATTACK CADAL 35-1370 42 84 4 132 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)
The overall popularity leader is MOD COD 55-2638. The most popular warrior this turn
was DON KING 47-5374. The ten other most popular fighters were CAT IN THE HAT
24-3103, TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419, GAR & BRILL 38-4252, MATH OP OWAIN 35-1418, STREET
RAT 11-3116, TENACIOUS 7-5337, HUNZICKER BOWL 23-4182, VANISH 73-4633, LONDON
QUIREBOY 59-2513, and MOD COD 55-2638.
The least popular fighter this week was AIM SEDUCE HAMMER 17-6815. The other ten
least popular fighters were HEBEE 38-4359, BLOODY BRAINLESS 96-2206, JAMES MADISON
99-1268, HUW AP HUW 35-3030, SUGARBEET 7-5219, OWAIN HARLSON 35-3130, PUMPING ON
STEELE 82--32315, CADAL 35-1370, HEAD CHEESE 96-1920, and BLOOD PIE 96-1918.
Arena (Number) W L K Arena (Number) W L K Arena (Number) W L K
KALTOS(5) 1 0 0 CHIMLEVTAL(31) 1 0 0 KHALANI(55) 1 0 0
BONSUR(7) 1 1 0 MURSKA(35) 1 4 0 ILLIS(59) 0 1 0
ARUAK CITY(11) 2 0 0 CLIFFHOME(38) 0 2 0 ERINIKA(73) 0 1 0
ALJAFIR(17) 0 1 0 RODEKI(42) 1 0 0 DWES EG(82) 0 1 0
TALCAMA(18) 1 0 0 ARDIVENT(46) 1 0 0 OLD VALAMANTIS(96) 2 1 0
TI(23) 0 1 0 NORTH FORK(47) 1 1 0 SHADOW GROVE(97) 1 0 0
ZORPUNT(24) 1 0 0 SNOWBOUND(50) 0 1 0 SOUTH RIDGE(99) 0 1 0
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
BULL DURHAM 5-4324 30 15 1 160 PARTY ANIMALS (591) KALTOS
TENACIOUS 7-5337 59 32 1 202 BATHTUB ARMADA (1196) BONSUR
STREET RAT 11-3116 37 32 2 192 GERFEL'S FRIENDS (516) ARUAK CITY
AIM SEDUCE HAMMER 17-6815 22 7 1 50 AIM 4 ISLE HAMMERZ (1414) ALJAFIR
HARLEY THE CADAVER 18-5366 28 52 3 92 STREET PIZZA (173) TALCAMA
HUNZICKER BOWL 23-4182 37 20 1 117 SKI TAOS (1070) TI
CAT IN THE HAT 24-3103 57 21 1 260 THE SEUSS HEUSS (804) ZORPUNT
UNZOE THE SHAMAN 31-4940 27 12 0 159 THE STORMGUARDS (132) CHIMLEVTAL
MATH OP OWAIN 35-1418 38 78 1 135 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415) MURSKA
GAR & BRILL 38-4252 60 88 0 150 JUST BECAUSE (1228) CLIFFHOME
JOHN WAYNE HAMMER 42-4213 18 26 2 87 KLK RANGE HAMMERZ (1408) RODEKI
BLACK EYES 46-2820 28 21 0 167 THE FURIOUS FIVE (1121) ARDIVENT
ACE METRIC 47-3554 24 15 0 174 ROYAL FLUSH (146) NORTH FORK
OSCAR 50-3153 39 16 0 193 OPEN SESAME (824) SNOWBOUND
MOD COD 55-2638 97 124 3 228 RHYME TYME (449) KHALANI
LONDON QUIREBOY 59-2513 27 10 1 207 CHAPEL ROCK (1352) ILLIS
VANISH 73-4633 20 7 1 75 THE INANIMATES (1361) ERINIKA
PUMPING ON STEEL 82--32315 17 17 0 120 NO RESPECT II (1399) DWES EG
HEAD CHEESE 96-1920 24 13 3 159 WHY SELL THIS? (1390) OLD VALAMANTIS
SCRAPPLE 97-1961 20 17 3 134 WHY SELL THIS? (1391) SHADOW GROVE
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
JAMES MADISON 99-1268 10 6 3 48 DEAD PRESIDENTS, YO (1412) SOUTH RIDGE