AD
Date : 04/16/2008 Duedate: 04/29/2008
HOME GUARD
DM-101 TURN-478
RANK TEAMS W L K % RANK TEAMS W L K %
1 STREET PIZZA 18/173 567 450 3 55.8 ITALIAN FOOTBALL 17/1422
WHY SELL THIS? 97/1391 3 GERFEL'S FRIE 11/516 190 180 2 51.4
DEAD PRESIDENTS, YO 99/1412 THE FURIOUS FIVE 46/1121
WHY SELL THIS? 96/1390 4 COLLUSION 97/1426 301 291 2 50.8
BLOODY RANDOMNESS 96/1405 BATHTUB ARMADA 7/1196
2-SKI TAOS 23/1070 956 840 15 53.2 THE INANIMATES 73/1361
THE BULLS 73/1144 SWEORDMASTERS 1/1210
CONSORTIUM CRAP 11/1421 SUGAR AND SPICE 7/1231
MILITARY MAYHEM 31/133 NO RESPECT II 82/1399
REAL BEER 21/1116 5 JUST BECAUSE 38/1228 452 604 9 42.8
OTTO'S MECHANICS 28/1073 6 RHYME TYME 55/449 619 878 15 41.3
USELESS TOOLS 57/1423 THE SEUSS HEUSS 24/804
PARTY ANIMALS 5/591 7 CHILDREN OF 35/1415 603 985 6 38.0
HERE TO PHOENIX 26/1072 8 AVERAGE GUYS 56/1424 2 5 0 28.6
ROYAL FLUSH 47/146 9 KLK RANGE HA 42/1408 8 23 0 25.8
'##/###' Avoid teams by their Team Id '-' Team did not fight this turn
REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER
You elder fighters surely remember me. Or maybe not, they do say memory is the
first thing to go. Or maybe it's the second, I forget. The younger ones may call me
Olaf Modeen, so long as they're polite about it. I return to HOME GUARD once again!
What's with JOHN WAYNE HAMMER? He actually beat AVERAGE GUYS' AARON, and walked away
with 32 more points from the fight. Nobody ever said JW Hammer was average. Laughs
were big at CHILDREN OF LLYR while they watched OWAIN HARLSON clobber PUMPING ON
STEELE. Something of a surprise. He (presumably Pumping) lost 28 points and got
bruised from objects thrown from the stands. I'm sure HOME GUARD is excited about
CAT IN THE HAT, the new Captain of the Guard from THE SEUSS HEUSS. (remember?) But
when you've seen as many as I have... Advice to fighters with a 1 will--give up
fighting! Get a job in a sideshow.
No matter the time or place, men will always duel. At least, they will if they
get paid for it. How well I know the feeling of being in the most avoided team! I
was a host in myself. Don't fall out of practive, SWEORDMASTERS! Management must be
dealin', as the boys at AVERAGE GUYS ain't reelin'! SWEORDMASTERS' mad! Don't know
why.
There have been some calls to lengthen the time limit. I didn't even know we
HAD a time limit. Do you want the fighters to walk away, or not? Is it my
imagination, or are fighters getting younger every day? Maybe some flaw in the
Agelessness Spell? To die so young, so gloriously... but not on the Isle. No deaths
here.
Many other cities have retirement homes for aged warriors. Any plans here? All
work and no play makes Olaf a dull fighter. Work and play no fighter dull Olaf.
Olaffighterwork and no play. I don't want to overstay my welcome...-- Olaf Modeen
We had fourteen fights, three standbys, no challenges. That's what, twenty-
seven active gladiators? We can do better than that. Get it in gear, you managers!
AARON (56-3636) (19-5-3,88) of AVERAGE GUYS fought JOHN WAYNE HAMMER (42-4213)
(19-32-2,54) of KLK RANGE HAMMERZ. AARON was viciously subdued by JOHN WAYNE HAMMER
in a crowd pleasing 3 minute bout.
VANISH (73-4633) (24-10-1,85) of THE INANIMATES fought LAKE SAILOR (101-2) (0-0-
0,30) of a bunch of local bums. VANISH devastated LAKE SAILOR in a crowd pleasing 1
minute gory mismatched bout.
BLOODY BRAINLESS (96-2206) (15-18-3,56) of BLOODY RANDOMNESS fought MISCHIEVOUS
IMP (1-7627) (35-23-3,59) of SWEORDMASTERS. BLOODY BRAINLESS devastated MISCHIEVOUS
IMP in a 1 minute mismatched conflict.
SANDMAN (97-2610) (11-2-3,74) of COLLUSION fought MATT (56-3637) (16-7-0,24) of
AVERAGE GUYS. SANDMAN overpowered MATT in a 1 minute one-sided match.
SNOTMAN (97-2611) (11-2-5,39) of COLLUSION fought LAKE SAILOR (101-2) (0-0-0,30)
of a bunch of local bums. SNOTMAN was overpowered by LAKE SAILOR in a 1 minute one-
sided melee.
JAMES MADISON (99-1268) (14-9-3,73) of DEAD PRESIDENTS, YO fought HUW AP HUW
(35-3030) (20-50-0,26) of CHILDREN OF LLYR. JAMES MADISON vanquished HUW AP HUW in a
1 minute one-sided fight.
BLACK EYES (46-2820) (29-24-0,148) of THE FURIOUS FIVE fought TAVIS CADFALSON
(35-1419) (33-90-2,119) of CHILDREN OF LLYR. BLACK EYES was vanquished by TAVIS
CADFALSON in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
HARLEY THE CADAVER (18-5366) (32-55-3,133) of STREET PIZZA fought CADAL (35-
1370) (44-89-4,146) of CHILDREN OF LLYR. HARLEY THE CADAVER savagely defeated CADAL
in an action packed 3 minute gruesome melee.
MATH OP OWAIN (35-1418) (42-81-1,173) of CHILDREN OF LLYR fought THE SINGING
BANDIT (11-6349) (31-39-0,145) of GERFEL'S FRIENDS. MATH OP OWAIN was overpowered by
THE SINGING BANDIT in a 2 minute mismatched brawl.
PUMPING ON STEELE (82-33221) (19-22-0,166) of NO RESPECT II fought OWAIN HARLSON
(35-3130) (26-37-1,130) of CHILDREN OF LLYR. PUMPING ON STEELE was devastated by
OWAIN HARLSON in a popular 2 minute uneven brawl.
BLOOD PIE (96-1918) (22-22-5,179) of WHY SELL THIS? fought THEATRE BUM (101-6)
(0-0-0,130) of a bunch of local bums. BLOOD PIE devastated THEATRE BUM in a popular
1 minute brutal one-sided contest.
HEAD CHEESE (96-1920) (29-15-3,200) of WHY SELL THIS? fought GAR & BRILL (38-
4252) (63-92-0,167) of JUST BECAUSE. HEAD CHEESE outlasted GAR & BRILL in an action
packed 10 minute fight.
MOD COD (55-2638) (99-129-3,200) of RHYME TYME fought SCRAPPLE (97-1961) (26-18-
3,201) of WHY SELL THIS? MOD COD was subdued by SCRAPPLE in a 2 minute melee.
For the title, valued by few: TENACIOUS (7-5337) (65-33-1,228) of BATHTUB
ARMADA fought CAT IN THE HAT (24-3103) (60-25-1,192) of THE SEUSS HEUSS. TENACIOUS
was viciously subdued by CAT IN THE HAT in a 7 minute Title fight.
Olaf
CAPTAIN OF THE GUARD W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
CAT IN THE HAT 24-3103 61 25 1 220 THE SEUSS HEUSS (804) ZORPUNT
GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
-FANNY BELT 28-1804 45 27 2 275 OTTO'S MECHANICS (1073) MORYA
-ACE METRIC 47-3554 26 17 0 220 ROYAL FLUSH (146) NORTH FORK
-BULL DURHAM 5-4324 34 16 1 219 PARTY ANIMALS (591) KALTOS
GRAND CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
-HUNZICKER BOWL 23-4182 41 20 2 210 SKI TAOS (1070) TI
SCRAPPLE 97-1961 27 18 3 207 WHY SELL THIS? (1391) SHADOW GROVE
HEAD CHEESE 96-1920 30 15 3 202 WHY SELL THIS? (1390) OLD VALAMANTIS
TENACIOUS 7-5337 65 34 1 201 BATHTUB ARMADA (1196) BONSUR
MOD COD 55-2638 99 130 3 198 RHYME TYME (449) KHALANI
-STREET RAT 11-3116 40 33 2 183 GERFEL'S FRIENDS (516) ARUAK CITY
BLOOD PIE 96-1918 23 22 5 181 WHY SELL THIS? (1390) OLD VALAMANTIS
GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
-STEVE MCQUEEN 47-3908 49 43 1 178 ROYAL FLUSH (146) NORTH FORK
GAR & BRILL 38-4252 63 93 0 177 JUST BECAUSE (1228) CLIFFHOME
-BASE ON BULLS 73-3101 28 8 4 175 THE BULLS (1144) ERINIKA
GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
THE SINGING BANDIT 11-6349 32 39 0 170 GERFEL'S FRIENDS (516) ARUAK CITY
OWAIN HARLSON 35-3130 27 37 1 161 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415) MURSKA
GRAND ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
MATH OP OWAIN 35-1418 42 82 1 150 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415) MURSKA
TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419 34 90 2 148 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415) MURSKA
HARLEY THE CADAVER 18-5366 33 55 3 148 STREET PIZZA (173) TALCAMA
-RUBBER KNIFE 57-2546 19 6 1 140 USELESS TOOLS (1423) ANDOR
PUMPING ON STEEL 82--32315 19 23 0 138 NO RESPECT II (1399) DWES EG
CADAL 35-1370 44 90 4 135 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415) MURSKA
-CUBA 26-3917 27 12 0 135 HERE TO PHOENIX (1072) CALEAM
-PRIVATE ROOM 31-3620 21 12 0 125 MILITARY MAYHEM (133) CHIMLEVTAL
BLACK EYES 46-2820 29 25 0 123 THE FURIOUS FIVE (1121) ARDIVENT
-SUGARBEET 7-5219 34 38 1 112 SUGAR AND SPICE (1231) BONSUR
GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
-LAND OF FLUSH 11-4373 13 12 0 92 CONSORTIUM CRAP (1421) ARUAK CITY
GRAND INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
VANISH 73-4633 25 10 1 87 THE INANIMATES (1361) ERINIKA
JOHN WAYNE HAMMER 42-4213 20 32 2 86 KLK RANGE HAMMERZ (1408) RODEKI
-CAFFREY'S 21-4748 16 2 1 80 REAL BEER (1116) SUNSET
BLOODY BRAINLESS 96-2206 16 18 3 77 BLOODY RANDOMNESS (1405) OLD VALAMANTIS
SANDMAN 97-2610 12 2 3 76 COLLUSION (1426) SHADOW GROVE
-JOAN OF ARC 81-165 21 12 0 75 DARQUE AGES (1413) SHADOWSPIRE
JAMES MADISON 99-1268 15 9 3 75 DEAD PRESIDENTS, YO (1412) SOUTH RIDGE
-DA VINCI 81-166 18 14 0 68 DARQUE AGES (1413) SHADOWSPIRE
AARON 56-3636 19 6 3 67 AVERAGE GUYS (1424) ROCANIS
-TOTTI 17-5991 14 7 2 64 ITALIAN FOOTBALL (1422) ALJAFIR
-COMMANDER SPUD 31-5149 14 9 1 64 MILITARY MAYHEM (133) CHIMLEVTAL
MISCHIEVOUS IMP 1-7627 35 24 3 47 SWEORDMASTERS (1210) MORDANT
HUW AP HUW 35-3030 20 51 0 30 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415) MURSKA
MATT 56-3637 16 8 0 30 AVERAGE GUYS (1424) ROCANIS
SNOTMAN 97-2611 11 3 5 24 COLLUSION (1426) SHADOW GROVE
'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.
THE DEAD W L K TEAM NAME SLAIN BY TURN
PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE
Cuba -- Good fight. -- Math op Owain
P.S. But Owain (no kin of mine, mere chance, that name) was correct about the smoke
of burning leaves. The scent of it clings to you and is less pleasant than many
leaf-smokes are. You might want to check your grounds for noxious weeds before
burning again.
Vanish -- Good fight. -- Tavis Cadfalson
P.S. I did try to help you up, but you'd, er, "vanished" before I got my hand there.
Good trick.
Aaron -- Good fight. -- Owain Harlson
P.S. You are too modest.
Katrina -- Good fight. -- Cadal
P.S. You're a hard woman.
Mischievous Imp -- Good fight. -- Huw ap Huw
P.S. I have been asked, in a manner of speaking, to pass to you a message which you
in turn are asked to pass to a colleague by the name of "Swallowtail." Something
about a wall that is "dry and lonely as a ruin without a soft and enlightening
touch."
LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS
TENACIOUS was viciously subdued by CAT IN THE HAT in a 7 minute Title fight.
MOD COD was subdued by SCRAPPLE in a 2 minute melee.
HEAD CHEESE outlasted GAR & BRILL in a action packed 10 minute fight.
BLOOD PIE devastated THEATRE BUM in a popular 1 minute brutal one-sided contest.
PUMPING ON STEELE was devastated by OWAIN HARLSON in a popular 2 minute uneven brawl.
MATH OP OWAIN was overpowered by THE SINGING BANDIT in a 2 minute mismatched brawl.
HARLEY THE CADAVER savagely defeated CADAL in a action packed 3 minute gruesome melee.
BLACK EYES was vanquished by TAVIS CADFALSON in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
JAMES MADISON vanquished HUW AP HUW in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
SNOTMAN was overpowered by LAKE SAILOR in a 1 minute one-sided melee.
SANDMAN overpowered MATT in a 1 minute one-sided match.
BLOODY BRAINLESS devastated MISCHIEVOUS IMP in a 1 minute mismatched conflict.
VANISH devastated LAKE SAILOR in a crowd pleasing 1 minute gory mismatched bout.
AARON was viciously subdued by JOHN WAYNE HAMMER in a crowd pleasing 3 minute bout.
BATTLE REPORT
MOST POPULAR RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS
|FIGHTING STYLE FIGHTS FIGHTING STYLE W - L - K PERCENT|
|AIMED BLOW 4 PARRY-LUNGE 13 - 2 - 0 87 |
|LUNGING ATTACK 4 TOTAL PARRY 26 - 12 - 1 68 |
|STRIKING ATTACK 4 LUNGING ATTACK 33 - 24 - 1 58 |
|PARRY-STRIKE 4 SLASHING ATTACK 8 - 6 - 0 57 |
|TOTAL PARRY 3 STRIKING ATTACK 28 - 28 - 0 50 |
|WALL OF STEEL 3 AIMED BLOW 22 - 24 - 0 48 |
|PARRY-LUNGE 1 PARRY-STRIKE 18 - 22 - 0 45 |
|SLASHING ATTACK 1 WALL OF STEEL 8 - 15 - 0 35 |
|BASHING ATTACK 1 BASHING ATTACK 6 - 22 - 0 21 |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 - 0 - 0 0 |
Turn 478 was great if you Not so great if you used The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles: the fighting styles: top eleven warriors are:
PARRY-LUNGE 1 - 0 TOTAL PARRY 1 - 2 4 LUNGING ATTACK
AIMED BLOW 3 - 1 PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 - 0 3 TOTAL PARRY
LUNGING ATTACK 3 - 1 SLASHING ATTACK 0 - 1 2 STRIKING ATTACK
STRIKING ATTACK 3 - 1 BASHING ATTACK 0 - 1 1 SLASHING ATTACK
PARRY-STRIKE 2 - 2 WALL OF STEEL 0 - 3 1 PARRY-LUNGE
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE
FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME
STRIKING ATTACK CAT IN THE HAT 24-3103 61 25 1 220 THE SEUSS HEUSS (804)
PARRY-LUNGE SCRAPPLE 97-1961 27 18 3 207 WHY SELL THIS? (1391)
TOTAL PARRY HEAD CHEESE 96-1920 30 15 3 202 WHY SELL THIS? (1390)
LUNGING ATTACK MOD COD 55-2638 99 130 3 198 RHYME TYME (449)
AIMED BLOW THE SINGING BANDI 11-6349 32 39 0 170 GERFEL'S FRIENDS (516)
PARRY-STRIKE MATH OP OWAIN 35-1418 42 82 1 150 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)
WALL OF STEEL PUMPING ON STEE 82--32315 19 23 0 138 NO RESPECT II (1399)
BASHING ATTACK CADAL 35-1370 44 90 4 135 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)
SLASHING ATTACK SNOTMAN 97-2611 11 3 5 24 COLLUSION (1426)
The overall popularity leader is MOD COD 55-2638. The most popular warrior this turn
was GAR & BRILL 38-4252. The ten other most popular fighters were CAT IN THE HAT
24-3103, HARLEY THE CADAVER 18-5366, JOHN WAYNE HAMMER 42-4213, OWAIN HARLSON
35-3130, BLOODY BRAINLESS 96-2206, TENACIOUS 7-5337, MOD COD 55-2638, HEAD CHEESE
96-1920, BLOOD PIE 96-1918, and MATH OP OWAIN 35-1418.
The least popular fighter this week was MATT 56-3637. The other ten least popular
fighters were SNOTMAN 97-2611, HUW AP HUW 35-3030, MISCHIEVOUS IMP 1-7627, SANDMAN
97-2610, BLACK EYES 46-2820, PUMPING ON STEELE 82--32315, AARON 56-3636, JAMES
MADISON 99-1268, SCRAPPLE 97-1961, and TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419.
Arena (Number) W L K Arena (Number) W L K Arena (Number) W L K
MORDANT(1) 0 1 0 CLIFFHOME(38) 0 1 0 ERINIKA(73) 1 0 0
BONSUR(7) 0 1 0 RODEKI(42) 1 0 0 DWES EG(82) 0 1 0
ARUAK CITY(11) 1 0 0 ARDIVENT(46) 0 1 0 OLD VALAMANTIS(96) 3 0 0
TALCAMA(18) 1 0 0 KHALANI(55) 0 1 0 SHADOW GROVE(97) 2 1 0
ZORPUNT(24) 1 0 0 ROCANIS(56) 0 2 0 SOUTH RIDGE(99) 1 0 0
MURSKA(35) 2 3 0
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
MISCHIEVOUS IMP 1-7627 35 24 3 47 SWEORDMASTERS (1210) MORDANT
TENACIOUS 7-5337 65 34 1 201 BATHTUB ARMADA (1196) BONSUR
THE SINGING BANDIT 11-6349 32 39 0 170 GERFEL'S FRIENDS (516) ARUAK CITY
HARLEY THE CADAVER 18-5366 33 55 3 148 STREET PIZZA (173) TALCAMA
CAT IN THE HAT 24-3103 61 25 1 220 THE SEUSS HEUSS (804) ZORPUNT
OWAIN HARLSON 35-3130 27 37 1 161 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415) MURSKA
GAR & BRILL 38-4252 63 93 0 177 JUST BECAUSE (1228) CLIFFHOME
JOHN WAYNE HAMMER 42-4213 20 32 2 86 KLK RANGE HAMMERZ (1408) RODEKI
BLACK EYES 46-2820 29 25 0 123 THE FURIOUS FIVE (1121) ARDIVENT
MOD COD 55-2638 99 130 3 198 RHYME TYME (449) KHALANI
AARON 56-3636 19 6 3 67 AVERAGE GUYS (1424) ROCANIS
VANISH 73-4633 25 10 1 87 THE INANIMATES (1361) ERINIKA
PUMPING ON STEEL 82--32315 19 23 0 138 NO RESPECT II (1399) DWES EG
HEAD CHEESE 96-1920 30 15 3 202 WHY SELL THIS? (1390) OLD VALAMANTIS
SCRAPPLE 97-1961 27 18 3 207 WHY SELL THIS? (1391) SHADOW GROVE
JAMES MADISON 99-1268 15 9 3 75 DEAD PRESIDENTS, YO (1412) SOUTH RIDGE
THE STOMPING GROUNDS
The new all-basher arena will be in Seam, DM 20. Only new teams (0FE) may
participate. The only rule is that all of your warriors must be bashers.
The first turn of the contest will be due on Monday, April 28. It will be a slow
turn-around arena. If you wish to enter a team, please submit your new team and first
turn strategies before then. Only one team per manager, please.
This arena will stay open indefinitely, providing there is interest (i.e., this is not
a contest that runs a set number of turns, although there are prizes scheduled after
the first 15 rounds). For more information, see details in the first newsletter or on
the forums.
-- RSI
Zeb Karan looked around the table at the rest of Dwes Eg's staff. Arenamasters,
standby and Dark Arena warriors, stewards and infirmarians, even the maintenance crew.
There was wine and beer on the side-table, even sandwiches, but no one was partaking.
"Stop looking like your dog died," Lew Voth said. He had once been the
arenamaster of Sentern and had taken his turns overseeing the fights in Dwes Eg. "We
all knew this day would come. When are they closing us down?"
"Immediately after the tourney, according to the information I was given."
"Short notice," Jame Rinvar, another arenamaster commented.
"No offense intended, these things just creep up on people. Tourneys make it
worse, I suppose, all the new teams being entered." Zeb grimaced. "Some of the file
cabinets have exploded from over-stuffing, you know, and it takes so long to run
through all the registered gladiators to find those who are planning to fight on any
given day that the day is OVER by the time we're ready to start."
"Which is why they closed down Sentern, Cimmeriac, and Firehold," Lew pointed
out. "This is the same thing all over again."
"Cycles," Jame said. "Things happen, and then later they happen again. We live
with it. And Dwes Eg did last for, what, eight and a half years before it reached the
explosion point. That isn't bad. That's forever, speaking practically."
"Eight or nine years is not forever--"
"The only thing that's real is today, and maybe, up to a point, tomorrow. I
don't see a problem with this. What are the new parameters, Zeb?"
"Dwes Eg remains open, existing teams can run and can recruit new members. BUT,
no new teams will be accepted. New teams will go into a new arena, DM 84, running its
first turn on the seventh of May. A regular two-week cycle."
"So Dwes Eg isn't actually being closed, just closed to new teams. Okay. This
works," Jame said again. "Number 84... does this mean it'll be out at that Blackstone
place? Rotten weather half the year, but I suppose you could say that about any site.
What about regional allegiance?"
"None specified in the data I received. Probably a personal-choice situation,"
Zeb said.
"Transfers?" Lew asked.
"I don't know about transfers IN," Zeb said, "but I'd guess yes, they would be
allowed. No transfers OUT, though. None out of DM 82, for that matter. Once you're
in 82 or 84, the only way out is death or graduation."
"That fairly describes most arenas," Jame said. "Anyone who takes up the
gladiatorial life has already accepted that."