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Date   : 10/01/2008    Duedate: 10/14/2008

HOME GUARD

DM-101    TURN-490

RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %  RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %
  1 MENAGERIE 26/1137      47   21  0 69.1      BLOODY RANDOMNESS 96/1405             
    CAER SIDHE 41/1218                        3 COLLUSION 97/1426     325  307  3 51.4
    THE ILLUMINATI 25/1179                      BATHTUB ARMADA 7/1196                 
  2 WHY SELL THI 97/1391  603  475  4 55.9    4 JUST BECAUSE 38/1228  456  612  9 42.7
    WHY SELL THIS? 96/1390                    5 CHILDREN OF  35/1415  618 1030  7 37.5
    DEAD PRESIDENTS, YO 99/1412           

    '##/###' Avoid teams by their Team Id     '-'  Team did not fight this turn

                                  WARRIOR SPOTLIGHT

This is not a continuing feature, just a stop-gap to get the personals off the front 
page.  Maybe it will happen again, and maybe it won't.  The Saint, Keeper of Lists,
was not consulted for manager names, so there are gaps and possible errors.  If
someone actually spots an error and cares, a personal might conceivably lead to it
being fixed if this feature ever appears again.  Or not, who knows? -- Livia

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                            ---===NON-REGIONAL NEWS===---

                                     Duelmasters
                                     -----------
 DM  20 tHE STOMPING GROUNDS (turn 431): MAULARIA of THE MAUL RATS (?, mgr.)
 DM  81 SHADOWSPIRE (turn 45): GRON DA CAVEMAN of DRAGONBANE (Nomad, mgr.)
 DM  82 DWES EG (turn 234): BRIGAND of CROSSED THIEVES (?, mgr.)
 DM  83 TELORINTHE (turn 18): BUZZ of OLLIS HEROES (?, mgr.)
 DM  84 BLACKSTONE (turn 10): SWAN of SISTERS OF MERCY (?, mgr.)
 DM 100 TALAHYA (turn 577): PRODIGAL SON of MANNEQUIN'S BEST (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM 101 HOME GUARD (turn 489): SCRAPPLE of WHY SELL THIS? (TUM, mgr.)
 DM 102 PRIMUS (turn 490): ZERO of WASTELAND II (TMM, mgr.)
 DM 106 CRYSALIS (turn 200): MORTICIAN of DARK TOADS (Consortium, mgr.)

                                      Top Teams
                                      ---------
 DM  20 THE STOMPING GROUNDS (turn 431): THE MAUL RATS (?, mgr.)
 DM  81 SHADOWSPIRE (turn 45): LA PENTARCHIE (La Pentarchie, mgr.)
 DM  82 DWES EG (turn 234): CROSSED THIEVES (?, mgr.)
 DM  83 TELORINTHE (turn 18): OLDIES (Smitty, mgr.)
 DM  84 BLACKSTONE (turn 10): SISTERS OF MERCY (?, mgr.)
 DM 100 TALAHYA (turn 577): CALL TO THUNDER (Ichabod Frothingslosh, mgr.)
 DM 101 HOME GUARD (turn 489): MENAGERIE (Ichabod Frothingslosh, mgr.)
 DM 102 PRIMUS (turn 490): EVILUTION ET AL (Dark One, mgr.)
 DM 106 CRYSALIS (turn 200): SENTINELS et al (Nomad, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
                                  -----------------
 DM  81 SHADOWSPIRE (turn 44): ANGUS of CLAN LONGBEARD (?, mgr.)
                               FLOR of CULT OF BACCHUS (DeGotti, mgr.)
 DM  84 BLACKSTONE (turn 10): SWAN of SISTERS OF MERCY (?, mgr.)

                             REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER

     I can hardly contain my excitement:  TEN fights today!  My heart (if I had one
that worked) goes pit-a-pat.  To what do we owe this surge of participation?  I can
only conclude that it is in some way preparation for the autumn tournament.  Both a
regular and a dead tourney, and I normally enjoy seeing a dead tourney come around
since it means that more gladiators who have died, as I did, get a chance to come
back, if not precisely as I did.  But the prize (shudder), I can hardly stand to
think of it.  Let us go on to more cheerful subjects, such as today's ten fights.
     Ten fights, and only three standbys involved, which means SEVENTEEN active
gladiators here today.  Wow.  Two challenges got through, neither of them tv.  Ah,
make that three challenges.
     Why Sell This? was the most-avoided stable, with The Illuminati doing the most
avoiding.  I figure they had their reasons.
     Tavis Cadfalson got the most challenges, which was probably due to somebody
double-challenging him.  With only three effective challenges in ten fights, you
can't really imagine a dozen different gladiators clamoring for the match.  Well,
okay, I suppose you could imagine it, but you can't believe it probable, okay?

     SANDMAN (97-2610) (17-7-4,83) of COLLUSION fought HUW AP HUW (35-3030) (20-62-
0,39) of CHILDREN OF LLYR.  SANDMAN overpowered HUW AP HUW in an exciting 1 minute
one-sided fight.  Really, Huw needs to retire.  Soon.
     SNOTMAN (97-2611) (15-9-5,70) of COLLUSION fought OWAIN HARLSON (35-3130) (28-
47-1,44) of CHILDREN OF LLYR.  SNOTMAN vanquished OWAIN HARLSON in an exciting 1
minute gruesome one-sided fight.  In fact, it wouldn't surprise me if all the
Children of Llyr retired.  What a bunch of wusses!  Yeah, okay, Home Guard was made
for wusses.  But that was then.  This is now, and it's different.
     CADAL (35-1370) (49-96-4,142) of CHILDREN OF LLYR fought BLOODY BRAINLESS (96-
2206) (22-23-4,121) of BLOODY RANDOMNESS.  CADAL was vanquished by BLOODY BRAINLESS 
in an action packed 1 minute one-sided duel.  Yep.
     GAR & BRILL (38-4252) (67-100-0,127) of JUST BECAUSE fought FAST-FINGERS FRED
(101-7) (0-0-0,110) of Miscellaneous Louts.  GAR & BRILL was defeated by FAST-FINGERS
FRED in an action packed 3 minute melee.  Gar & Brill could retire, too, and I
wouldn't mind.  Some of you guys who look for easy wins and good skills might mind,
though.
     SILHOUETTE (26-2006) (29-9-0,173) of MENAGERIE fought JAMES MADISON (99-1268)
(21-14-3,108) of DEAD PRESIDENTS, YO.  SILHOUETTE overpowered JAMES MADISON in a 1
minute mismatched brawl.  Silhouette is too much for a dead man.  I speak who knows.
     BLOOD PIE (96-1918) (29-27-5,195) of WHY SELL THIS? fought SEVEN-EYED GOLLYWOG
(101-31) (0-0-0,220) of Miscellaneous Louts.  BLOOD PIE devastated SEVEN-EYED
GOLLYWOG in a crowd pleasing 1 minute one-sided duel.  Yep, that's the trouble with
having seven eyes, you never know which way you're looking.
     HEAD CHEESE (96-1920) (38-18-3,219) of WHY SELL THIS? fought SHARON SHEW (101-
25) (0-0-0,181) of Miscellaneous Louts.  HEAD CHEESE overpowered SHARON SHEW in a
crowd pleasing 4 minute one-sided fight.  The Head Cheese, it appears, is not a
gentleman.  But then, Sharon isn't a lady, so they were a good match.

The challenges:
     GWYN AP NUDD (41-1210) (26-6-0,143) of CAER SIDHE challenged MATH OP OWAIN (35-
1418) (46-89-1,157) of CHILDREN OF LLYR.  Up 13.  GWYN AP NUDD vanquished MATH OP
OWAIN in an exciting 1 minute uneven Challenge battle.  I hope your manager feels
better now, Gwyn.
     SOUL SCOURGE (25-1223) (28-9-2,203) of THE ILLUMINATI challenged TAVIS CADFALSON
(35-1419) (38-97-3,198) of CHILDREN OF LLYR.  Down 5.  SOUL SCOURGE was devastated by
TAVIS CADFALSON in a 1 minute Challenge fight.  Oops!  Tavis, how could you win?  The
bookies are upset, so watch your back.

For the title:
     SCRAPPLE (97-1961) (34-22-3,251) of WHY SELL THIS? fought TENACIOUS (7-5337)
(73-36-1,199) of BATHTUB ARMADA.  Down 52.  SCRAPPLE was savagely defeated by
TENACIOUS in a crowd pleasing 9 minute Title duel.  Nine minutes!  I'm impressed.
Obviously, Tenacious really wanted the title back.  And a congratulations to him.

                                        Olaf

CAPTAIN OF THE GUARD          W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 TENACIOUS 7-5337            74  36  1  214  BATHTUB ARMADA (1196)      BONSUR

GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS    W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 HEAD CHEESE 96-1920         39  18  3  225  WHY SELL THIS? (1390)      OLD VALAMANTIS
 TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419     39  97  3  219  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA

GRAND CHAMPIONS               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 BLOOD PIE 96-1918           30  27  5  209  WHY SELL THIS? (1390)      OLD VALAMANTIS
 SCRAPPLE 97-1961            34  23  3  207  WHY SELL THIS? (1391)      SHADOW GROVE
 SOUL SCOURGE 25-1223        28  10  2  189  THE ILLUMINATI (1179)      LYRATILAN

GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS       W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 SILHOUETTE 26-2006          30   9  0  175  MENAGERIE (1137)           CALEAM
 GWYN AP NUDD 41-1210        27   6  0  161  CAER SIDHE (1218)          KATI-TEI

GRAND ADEPTS                  W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 MATH OP OWAIN 35-1418       46  90  1  145  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA
 BLOODY BRAINLESS 96-2206    23  23  4  143  BLOODY RANDOMNESS (1405)   OLD VALAMANTIS
 CADAL 35-1370               49  97  4  121  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA
 JAMES MADISON 99-1268       21  15  3  119  DEAD PRESIDENTS, YO (1412) SOUTH RIDGE
 GAR & BRILL 38-4252         67 101  0  114  JUST BECAUSE (1228)        CLIFFHOME

GRAND INITIATES               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 SANDMAN 97-2610             18   7  4   85  COLLUSION (1426)           SHADOW GROVE
 SNOTMAN 97-2611             16   9  5   74  COLLUSION (1426)           SHADOW GROVE
-ALEGRIA 26-4291             19   3  1   61  MENAGERIE (1137)           CALEAM
 OWAIN HARLSON 35-3130       28  48  1   43  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA
 HUW AP HUW 35-3030          20  63  0   43  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                   W   L  K TEAM NAME              SLAIN BY                  TURN

                               PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE

I'll tell you what's ridiculous, is Jorja is getting totally bent out of shape
because the personals were on the front page of the newsletter.  You'd think her
complete greatest mission in life was to see to it that the various newsletters used
as much paper as possible.  She's insane!  But she's also, unfortunately, really good
at bashing heads around the guildhouse.  So... personals.  (sigh) -- the Children of
Llyr
P.S.  Not that we can see how writing more personals will keep them off the front
page.

Silhouette -- I don't know about "well-fought," but I thank you for saying so.  If my
timing was as good as yours, it might have gone another way.  As it is... wear the
win in good health. -- Math op Owain

It occurs to me that if Jorja was to get REALLY upset about the personals on the
front page, she might dump in episodes of the adventure some of us have gotten sucked
into.  So far, O managers of Home Guard, you have lucked out on that one. -- Math

Head Cheese -- Well, huh, I guess I should be honored that I don't have to fight some
lesser or subordinate cheese, but still, I could do without fighting cheese at all.
What's the point?  Either you melt it on top of your sandwich and eat it, or you
don't. -- Tavis Cadfalson

Bloody Brainless -- What do you want to bet that when the impending Split splats,
I'll be forced out of Home Guard?  Which seems unfair, since I believe I come rather
close to defining the concept of "pud." -- Cadal

Snotman -- Totally disgusting.  I am not your hankie. -- Huw ap Huw

Darned if I know what that Bouncer bunged me out of the B&G.  It isn't like I was
rowdy.  I'm a very courteous drunk, really. -- Owain Harlson
P.S.  And I wasn't more than gently lit in any case.

Gwyn -- Olaf may have a point about my record.  I was the victim of SEVERE manager
inattention and spent my WHOLE FIRST YEAR as a gladiator running "no weapons, no
armor, 1 1 1 HE HE" because Jorja forgot to send in a strategy with my roll-up and
the team was on maintenance.  This taught me to be tough, among other things.
Considering that handicap, I figure I'm bringing my record up rather well. -- Cadal

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

SOUL SCOURGE was devastated by TAVIS CADFALSON in a 1 minute Challenge fight.
GWYN AP NUDD vanquished MATH OP OWAIN in a exciting 1 minute uneven Challenge battle.
SCRAPPLE was savagely defeated by TENACIOUS in a crowd pleasing 9 minute Title duel.
HEAD CHEESE overpowered SHARON SHEW in a crowd pleasing 4 minute one-sided fight.
BLOOD PIE devastated SEVEN-EYED GOLLYWOG in a crowd pleasing 1 minute one-sided duel.
SILHOUETTE overpowered JAMES MADISON in a 1 minute mismatched brawl.
GAR & BRILL was defeated by FAST-FINGERS FRED in a action packed 3 minute melee.
CADAL was vanquished by BLOODY BRAINLESS in a action packed 1 minute one-sided duel.
SNOTMAN vanquished OWAIN HARLSON in a exciting 1 minute gruesome one-sided fight.
SANDMAN overpowered HUW AP HUW in a exciting 1 minute one-sided fight.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|PARRY-STRIKE                     4         TOTAL PARRY       24 -   6 -  0      80  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      3         PARRY-RIPOSTE      7 -   2 -  0      78  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   3         PARRY-LUNGE        6 -   4 -  0      60  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  3         LUNGING ATTACK    18 -  12 -  1      60  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    1         WALL OF STEEL      1 -   1 -  0      50  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  1         AIMED BLOW         6 -   7 -  0      46  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      1         SLASHING ATTACK    5 -   7 -  0      42  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   1         STRIKING ATTACK   15 -  22 -  0      41  |
|AIMED BLOW                       0         PARRY-STRIKE      14 -  25 -  1      36  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    0         BASHING ATTACK     5 -   9 -  0      36  |

Turn 490 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -  0     STRIKING ATTACK    1 -  2         3  TOTAL PARRY    
SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  0     PARRY-STRIKE       1 -  3         3  LUNGING ATTACK 
TOTAL PARRY        3 -  0     AIMED BLOW         0 -  0         1  PARRY-LUNGE    
LUNGING ATTACK     2 -  1     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  1         1  PARRY-RIPOSTE  
                              BASHING ATTACK     0 -  1         1  PARRY-STRIKE   
                              WALL OF STEEL      0 -  0         1  STRIKING ATTACK
                                                                1  BASHING ATTACK 

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
TOTAL PARRY      TENACIOUS 7-5337           74  36  1  214 BATHTUB ARMADA (1196)
LUNGING ATTACK   TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419    39  97  3  219 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
PARRY-LUNGE      SCRAPPLE 97-1961           34  23  3  207 WHY SELL THIS? (1391)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    GWYN AP NUDD 41-1210       27   6  0  161 CAER SIDHE (1218)
PARRY-STRIKE     MATH OP OWAIN 35-1418      46  90  1  145 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)
STRIKING ATTACK  BLOODY BRAINLESS 96-2206   23  23  4  143 BLOODY RANDOMNESS (1405)
BASHING ATTACK   CADAL 35-1370              49  97  4  121 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)
SLASHING ATTACK  SNOTMAN 97-2611            16   9  5   74 COLLUSION (1426)

The overall popularity leader is GAR & BRILL 38-4252.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was SCRAPPLE 97-1961.  The ten other most popular fighters were TENACIOUS 
7-5337, HEAD CHEESE 96-1920, BLOOD PIE 96-1918, BLOODY BRAINLESS 96-2206, SANDMAN 
97-2610, GWYN AP NUDD 41-1210, GAR & BRILL 38-4252, SNOTMAN 97-2611, TAVIS CADFALSON 
35-1419, and MATH OP OWAIN 35-1418.

The least popular fighter this week was CADAL 35-1370.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were SOUL SCOURGE 25-1223, OWAIN HARLSON 35-3130, JAMES MADISON 99-1268, HUW 
AP HUW 35-3030, SILHOUETTE 26-2006, MATH OP OWAIN 35-1418, TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419, 
SNOTMAN 97-2611, GAR & BRILL 38-4252, and GWYN AP NUDD 41-1210.

Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  
BONSUR(7)            1  0 0  MURSKA(35)           1  4 0  OLD VALAMANTIS(96)   3  0 0  
LYRATILAN(25)        0  1 0  CLIFFHOME(38)        0  1 0  SHADOW GROVE(97)     2  1 0  
CALEAM(26)           1  0 0  KATI-TEI(41)         1  0 0  SOUTH RIDGE(99)      0  1 0  

TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 TENACIOUS 7-5337            74  36  1  214  BATHTUB ARMADA (1196)      BONSUR
 SOUL SCOURGE 25-1223        28  10  2  189  THE ILLUMINATI (1179)      LYRATILAN
 SILHOUETTE 26-2006          30   9  0  175  MENAGERIE (1137)           CALEAM
 TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419     39  97  3  219  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA
 GAR & BRILL 38-4252         67 101  0  114  JUST BECAUSE (1228)        CLIFFHOME
 GWYN AP NUDD 41-1210        27   6  0  161  CAER SIDHE (1218)          KATI-TEI
 HEAD CHEESE 96-1920         39  18  3  225  WHY SELL THIS? (1390)      OLD VALAMANTIS
 SCRAPPLE 97-1961            34  23  3  207  WHY SELL THIS? (1391)      SHADOW GROVE
 JAMES MADISON 99-1268       21  15  3  119  DEAD PRESIDENTS, YO (1412) SOUTH RIDGE