AD
Date : 04/29/2009 Duedate: 05/12/2009
HOME GUARD
DM-101 TURN-505
RANK TEAMS W L K % RANK TEAMS W L K %
1 CALL TO THUND 7/1217 55 28 1 66.3 USELESS TOOLS 54/735
2 WHY SELL THI 96/1390 643 488 5 56.9 ROYAL FLUSH 47/146
DEAD PRESIDENTS, YO 99/1412 DUCKS UNLIMITED 39/1221
BLOODY RANDOMNESS 96/1405 MEAT YOUR MAKER 72/1439
3 SEA DOGS 18/426 104 81 0 56.2 5 COLLUSION 97/1426 346 318 4 52.1
SEA DOGS 51/1440 6 D-DAY SQUAD 34/1449 79 84 1 48.5
SEA DOGS 36/1450 ALL THE MUN'S MEN 37/355
SEA DOGS 21/1446 KIWI CONNECTION 73/1453
DUNGEON CELL 21 82/1455 ALL-STAR NANA'S 67/1451
DUNGEON CELL 66 82/1441 OTAGO HIGHLANDERS 14/1444
SEA DOGS 1/1442 7 JUST BECAUSE 38/1228 461 622 9 42.6
DUNGEON CELL 24 82/1456 8 CHILDREN OF 35/1415 645 1078 7 37.4
DUNGEON CELL 508C 99/1457 9-GIRLS X3 43/1459 1 2 0 33.3
4-SPARF! 20/1069 988 864 15 53.3 GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS 71/1460
PARTY ANIMALS 5/591 10-PHILANTHROPI 35/1374 1 8 0 11.1
CHAPEL ROCK 59/1352 PHILANTHROPISTS 3 35/1395
OTTO'S PARTS 52/892 11 ULTRA-VIOLEN 26/1458 0 3 0 0.0
'##/###' Avoid teams by their Team Id '-' Team did not fight this turn
THE GUARDIAN'S FORUM
Reflections by the Captain of the Guard
I will soon be banished from Home Guard, an arena that I've grown to love. It is a
bittersweet moment, but I am pleased to be Captain of the Guard once more, before
beginning the journey to Talahya.
James Madison, you are an impressive warrior, especially for your style. You took
the top spot from me once before, but I have reclaimed that honor in a perilously
close match.
My scribe writes these words for me as I sharpen my blade in preparation for the
Grand Tournament. I will be competing in the ADM division, while four of my
teammates, Miss Teak, Shewish Whaler, Knothandler, and Hortator (currently inactive,
although he keeps a residence here), will be competing as Freshman. By the time you
read this, I suspect you will have already discovered who among us has brought glory
to Home Guard. But I tell you this: that on the morning of the Grand Tournament, my
thoughts are with you, Home Guard. Good luck to you all in the tourney!
Goldenbeard of the Sea Dogs
Captain of the Guard
REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER
Debby took the notes for me, she's a good girl, even if she does spend too much
time in the sun. MVP is one of her "things," and I'm sure you'll be thrilled to know
that the MVP award, if there is such a thing, goes to Abbott of Otago Highlanders.
Nobody avoided, but Gar & Brill got the most challenges.
We had seventeen fights, which involved three standbys. There were three
challenges, none of them TV challengs.
The fights:
PRISONER 0327 (82-40997) (20-17-2,80) of DUNGEON CELL 66 fought MEAN SPIRIT
(101-5) (0-0-0,70) of Impatient Standbys. PRISONER 0327 overpowered MEAN SPIRIT in a
1 minute one-sided bout. Better watch out when night falls, Pris. That Mean Spirit
is aptly named.
PRISONER BG11 (99-1620) (9-14-4,62) of DUNGEON CELL 508C fought B&G BOUNCER
(101-3) (0-0-0,30) of Impatient Standbys. PRISONER BG11 was devastated by B&G
BOUNCER in an exciting 1 minute one-sided brawl. Tcha! How could you do something
loike this BG11? You'll be giving that Bouncer big ideas.
KNOTHANDLER (21-6555) (24-11-2,87) of SEA DOGS fought ABBOTT (14-4131) (19-14-
2,42) of OTAGO HIGHLANDERS. KNOTHANDLER was handily defeated by ABBOTT in a 1 minute
mismatched bout. To Abbott's great advantage. Way it goes.
KARATIA (73-3624) (23-12-1,57) of KIWI CONNECTION fought JETSAM (1-8172) (19-20-
1,69) of SEA DOGS. KARATIA vanquished JETSAM in an action packed 1 minute mismatched
bout. Jetisoned Jetsam, perhaps? The play on that name suggests itself
irresistably.
OWAIN HARLSON (35-3130) (34-56-1,62) of CHILDREN OF LLYR fought HIDA YAKAMO (7-
5052) (19-7-0,64) of CALL TO THUNDER. OWAIN HARLSON was overpowered by HIDA YAKAMO
in a 1 minute mismatched conflict. And was Owain's face red, or what? That's gotta
be embarrassing, even if Hida may possibly have had hidden tourney fights. Hmm, Hida
hid 'em? Got a sort of a swing to it.
PATCH (36-7297) (25-16-0,91) of SEA DOGS fought HUW AP HUW (35-3030) (25-72-
0,55) of CHILDREN OF LLYR. PATCH subdued HUW AP HUW in a crowd pleasing 1 minute
match. What a surprise.
PRISONER 0103 (82-33733) (35-61-0,137) of DUNGEON CELL 21 fought THEATRE BUM
(101-6) (0-0-0,130) of Impatient Standbys. PRISONER 0103 devastated THEATRE BUM in a
2 minute mismatched conflict. Maybe that'll teach the Bum not to try to cut ahead in
the theater queue.
PRISONER 0118 (82-33748) (24-60-0,120) of DUNGEON CELL 24 fought MATH OP OWAIN
(35-1418) (52-98-1,147) of CHILDREN OF LLYR. PRISONER 0118 overpowered MATH OP OWAIN
in an exciting 1 minute one-sided fight. Amazing that the Prisoner's record as even
worse, percentagewise, than Math's. That takes doing. Or not doing.
SHEWISH WHALER (18-9272) (32-15-1,164) of SEA DOGS fought TAVIS CADFALSON (35-
1419) (45-105-3,123) of CHILDREN OF LLYR. SHEWISH WHALER beat TAVIS CADFALSON in a 2
minute melee. Well, Tavis is big as a whale, so maybe this totally makes sense, eh?
KISSYFUR (67-2187) (30-21-1,170) of ALL-STAR NANA'S fought BALLAST (1-7727) (35-
45-0,172) of SEA DOGS. KISSYFUR was outwaited by BALLAST in a popular 8 minute gory
duel. Eight minutes? That's almost respectable! I get tired of all these one-
shots, sometimes.
MAKESHIFT ANCHOR (1-7724) (37-45-0,157) of SEA DOGS fought CADAL (35-1370) (53-
107-4,145) of CHILDREN OF LLYR. MAKESHIFT ANCHOR won victory over CADAL in a popular
3 minute duel. Not to criticize Makeshift, but how could this have been so difficult
as to take three minutes?
JAMES MADISON (99-1268) (32-18-3,202) of DEAD PRESIDENTS, YO fought U.S.S.
ARIZONA (34-2643) (30-22-1,154) of D-DAY SQUAD. JAMES MADISON handily defeated
U.S.S. ARIZONA in a 1 minute uneven fight. There seems to be some kind of congruence
here, but don't ask me WHAT kind. I wouldn't know.
MISS TEAK (1-8015) (34-28-1,181) of SEA DOGS fought BATMUN (37-2634) (39-20-
0,192) of ALL THE MUN'S MEN. MISS TEAK was defeated by BATMUN in an exciting 3
minute bloody struggle. At least, Batmun was excited. Of course, once Miss Teak's
bodice tore, who wouldn't be?
The challenges:
HEART BREAKER (26-4752) (18-10-0,48) of ULTRA-VIOLENT challenged BILGE RAT (51-
5334) (27-6-1,95) of SEA DOGS. Up 47. HEART BREAKER was viciously subdued by BILGE
RAT in a 1 minute Challenge brawl. That rat!
SANDMAN (97-2610) (25-13-4,142) of COLLUSION challenged GAR & BRILL (38-4252)
(72-110-0,143) of JUST BECAUSE. Up 1. SANDMAN demolished GAR & BRILL in a popular 1
minute one-sided Challenge melee. Good work. One-shot the Gar any time.
SNOTMAN (97-2611) (26-12-6,210) of COLLUSION challenged HEAD CHEESE (96-1920)
(50-21-3,202) of WHY SELL THIS? SNOTMAN was devastated by HEAD CHEESE in a 1 minute
mismatched Challenge fight. And so is anybody who tries that stuff, or so I hear. I
haven't tried it myself, mind. But I don't do stuff like that. It's an advantage,
sometimes, being dead.
For the title:
GOLDENBEARD (21-6202) (35-9-1,234) of SEA DOGS fought BLOODY BRAINLESS (96-2206)
(32-28-4,234) of BLOODY RANDOMNESS. GOLDENBEARD was assassinated by BLOODY BRAINLESS
in a 1 minute mismatched Title match. Wow, talk about Unnecessary Roughness! Hard
luck, Goldenbeard, but congratulations to Bloody Brainless.
Olaf
CAPTAIN OF THE GUARD W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
BLOODY BRAINLESS 96-2206 33 28 5 308 BLOODY RANDOMNESS (1405) OLD VALAMANTIS
GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
HEAD CHEESE 96-1920 51 21 3 220 WHY SELL THIS? (1390) OLD VALAMANTIS
GRAND CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
JAMES MADISON 99-1268 33 18 3 205 DEAD PRESIDENTS, YO (1412) SOUTH RIDGE
BATMUN 37-2634 40 20 0 198 ALL THE MUN'S MEN (355) SIBIKHAS
SNOTMAN 97-2611 26 13 6 198 COLLUSION (1426) SHADOW GROVE
GOLDENBEARD 21-6202 35 10 1 191 SEA DOGS (1446) SUNSET
-CATFISH HUNTER 5-3315 22 19 1 191 PARTY ANIMALS (591) KALTOS
MISS TEAK 1-8015 34 29 1 187 SEA DOGS (1442) MORDANT
-LONDON QUIREBOY 59-2513 29 15 1 187 CHAPEL ROCK (1352) ILLIS
BALLAST 1-7727 36 45 0 184 SEA DOGS (1442) MORDANT
GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
KISSYFUR 67-2187 30 22 1 169 ALL-STAR NANA'S (1451) BARIKALA
SHEWISH WHALER 18-9272 33 15 1 166 SEA DOGS (426) TALCAMA
MAKESHIFT ANCHOR 1-7724 38 45 0 160 SEA DOGS (1442) MORDANT
U.S.S. ARIZONA 34-2643 30 23 1 160 D-DAY SQUAD (1449) MONUNTIAL
-ROT TEN EGGS 47-3099 41 41 0 154 ROYAL FLUSH (146) NORTH FORK
SANDMAN 97-2610 26 13 4 154 COLLUSION (1426) SHADOW GROVE
GRAND ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
-HOCKEY DUCK 39-937 31 20 1 148 DUCKS UNLIMITED (1221) XOCHITHLAN
CADAL 35-1370 53 108 4 146 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415) MURSKA
PRISONER 0103 82--31803 36 61 0 146 DUNGEON CELL 21 (1455) DWES EG
-ROWDY YOBBO 20-3429 26 32 1 146 SPARF! (1069) SEAM
PRISONER 0118 82--31788 25 60 0 145 DUNGEON CELL 24 (1456) DWES EG
-PHONELESS CORD 54-2018 28 17 0 138 USELESS TOOLS (735) TROCAR
GAR & BRILL 38-4252 72 111 0 135 JUST BECAUSE (1228) CLIFFHOME
TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419 45 106 3 133 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415) MURSKA
MATH OP OWAIN 35-1418 52 99 1 123 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415) MURSKA
GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
BILGE RAT 51-5334 28 6 1 97 SEA DOGS (1440) TRICORUS
PATCH 36-7297 26 16 0 93 SEA DOGS (1450) JHANS
GRAND INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
-PORKY PIG 72-5953 20 8 2 88 MEAT YOUR MAKER (1439) DRAGONHEAD
PRISONER 0327 82--24539 21 17 2 87 DUNGEON CELL 66 (1441) DWES EG
ABBOTT 14-4131 20 14 2 82 OTAGO HIGHLANDERS (1444) TOBIR
KARATIA 73-3624 24 12 1 74 KIWI CONNECTION (1453) ERINIKA
HIDA YAKAMO 7-5052 20 7 0 74 CALL TO THUNDER (1217) BONSUR
-CAULIFLOWER EARS 52-3424 24 20 0 64 OTTO'S PARTS (892) FRATSFA
HUW AP HUW 35-3030 25 73 0 62 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415) MURSKA
HEART BREAKER 26-4752 18 11 0 61 ULTRA-VIOLENT (1458) CALEAM
OWAIN HARLSON 35-3130 34 57 1 56 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415) MURSKA
KNOTHANDLER 21-6555 24 12 2 56 SEA DOGS (1446) SUNSET
GRAND INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
JETSAM 1-8172 19 21 1 56 SEA DOGS (1442) MORDANT
-DECK APE 18-9678 15 8 2 55 SEA DOGS (426) TALCAMA
-OH OHLISH OMINAH 35-3912 15 14 2 54 PHILANTHROPISTS 3 (1395) MURSKA
-ZEBZAMBEZI 35-3581 14 11 3 36 PHILANTHROPISTS (1374) MURSKA
PRISONER BG11 99-1620 9 15 4 36 DUNGEON CELL 508C (1457) SOUTH RIDGE
'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.
THE DEAD W L K TEAM NAME SLAIN BY TURN
GOLDENBEARD 21-6202 35 10 1 SEA DOGS 1446 BLOODY BRAINLESS 96-2206 505
PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE
Heartbreaker -- I'd like to offer you a belated welcome to Home Guard! It was an
exciting match, lots of back and forth action, and it is always enjoyable to fight a
practitioner of one of the less popular fighting styles. -- Prisoner BG11
To those whom we fought -- Good fight. -- We who fought you.
29 April 09
Greetings All -- This is Vincent Michaels, "the Rake", mgr. of the Stormbringers out
of DM 33 Niatoli Island, back after a relatively long layoff. I come back to my
arena to find only two other teams there. Terrible! I'm calling on all you managers
out there who have inactive teams in Niatoli to put them back in the game. Also,
anyone else who wants to come check out our little island are welcome. Good food and
a lot of good gambling, and you will have a chance to smack around Gen. GirlPants and
his band of Ravaged Queens. Great fun. Come one, come all!
LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS
SNOTMAN was devastated by HEAD CHEESE in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge fight.
SANDMAN demolished GAR & BRILL in a popular 1 minute one-sided Challenge melee.
HEART BREAKER was viciously subdued by BILGE RAT in a 1 minute Challenge brawl.
GOLDENBEARD was assassinated by BLOODY BRAINLESS in a 1 minute mismatched Title match.
MISS TEAK was defeated by BATMUN in a exciting 3 minute bloody struggle.
JAMES MADISON handily defeated U.S.S. ARIZONA in a 1 minute uneven fight.
MAKESHIFT ANCHOR won victory over CADAL in a popular 3 minute duel.
KISSYFUR was outwaited by BALLAST in a popular 8 minute gory duel.
SHEWISH WHALER beat TAVIS CADFALSON in a 2 minute melee.
PRISONER 0118 overpowered MATH OP OWAIN in a exciting 1 minute one-sided fight.
PRISONER 0103 devastated THEATRE BUM in a 2 minute mismatched conflict.
PATCH subdued HUW AP HUW in a crowd pleasing 1 minute match.
OWAIN HARLSON was overpowered by HIDA YAKAMO in a 1 minute mismatched conflict.
KARATIA vanquished JETSAM in a action packed 1 minute mismatched bout.
KNOTHANDLER was handily defeated by ABBOTT in a 1 minute mismatched bout.
PRISONER BG11 was devastated by B&G BOUNCER in a exciting 1 minute one-sided brawl.
PRISONER 0327 overpowered MEAN SPIRIT in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
BATTLE REPORT
MOST POPULAR RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS
|FIGHTING STYLE FIGHTS FIGHTING STYLE W - L - K PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK 8 SLASHING ATTACK 6 - 3 - 1 67 |
|AIMED BLOW 6 TOTAL PARRY 32 - 17 - 0 65 |
|TOTAL PARRY 5 LUNGING ATTACK 44 - 31 - 0 59 |
|PARRY-STRIKE 4 PARRY-STRIKE 22 - 23 - 0 49 |
|STRIKING ATTACK 4 STRIKING ATTACK 19 - 23 - 1 45 |
|PARRY-LUNGE 1 AIMED BLOW 26 - 32 - 0 45 |
|SLASHING ATTACK 1 PARRY-RIPOSTE 3 - 4 - 0 43 |
|BASHING ATTACK 1 BASHING ATTACK 9 - 13 - 0 41 |
|WALL OF STEEL 1 WALL OF STEEL 6 - 11 - 0 35 |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 PARRY-LUNGE 0 - 3 - 0 0 |
Turn 505 was great if you Not so great if you used The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles: the fighting styles: top eleven warriors are:
TOTAL PARRY 5 - 0 PARRY-LUNGE 0 - 1 3 TOTAL PARRY
AIMED BLOW 3 - 3 PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 - 0 3 LUNGING ATTACK
PARRY-STRIKE 2 - 2 SLASHING ATTACK 0 - 1 2 PARRY-STRIKE
LUNGING ATTACK 4 - 4 BASHING ATTACK 0 - 1 1 STRIKING ATTACK
STRIKING ATTACK 2 - 2 WALL OF STEEL 0 - 1 1 SLASHING ATTACK
1 WALL OF STEEL
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE
FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME
STRIKING ATTACK BLOODY BRAINLESS 96-2206 33 28 5 308 BLOODY RANDOMNESS (1405)
TOTAL PARRY HEAD CHEESE 96-1920 51 21 3 220 WHY SELL THIS? (1390)
PARRY-STRIKE JAMES MADISON 99-1268 33 18 3 205 DEAD PRESIDENTS, YO (1412)
SLASHING ATTACK SNOTMAN 97-2611 26 13 6 198 COLLUSION (1426)
LUNGING ATTACK GOLDENBEARD 21-6202 35 10 1 191 SEA DOGS (1446)
WALL OF STEEL U.S.S. ARIZONA 34-2643 30 23 1 160 D-DAY SQUAD (1449)
BASHING ATTACK CADAL 35-1370 53 108 4 146 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)
AIMED BLOW PRISONER 0103 82--31803 36 61 0 146 DUNGEON CELL 21 (1455)
PARRY-LUNGE HEART BREAKER 26-4752 18 11 0 61 ULTRA-VIOLENT (1458)
The overall popularity leader is GAR & BRILL 38-4252. The most popular warrior this
turn was KISSYFUR 67-2187. The ten other most popular fighters were MISS TEAK
1-8015, BILGE RAT 51-5334, CADAL 35-1370, BALLAST 1-7727, JAMES MADISON 99-1268,
BLOODY BRAINLESS 96-2206, BATMUN 37-2634, MAKESHIFT ANCHOR 1-7724, SHEWISH WHALER
18-9272, and PRISONER 0103 82--31803.
The least popular fighter this week was HEART BREAKER 26-4752. The other ten least
popular fighters were PRISONER BG11 99-1620, KNOTHANDLER 21-6555, JETSAM 1-8172,
OWAIN HARLSON 35-3130, HUW AP HUW 35-3030, MATH OP OWAIN 35-1418, GAR & BRILL
38-4252, SNOTMAN 97-2611, PRISONER 0327 82--24539, and ABBOTT 14-4131.
Arena (Number) W L K Arena (Number) W L K Arena (Number) W L K
MORDANT(1) 2 2 0 MONUNTIAL(34) 0 1 0 BARIKALA(67) 0 1 0
BONSUR(7) 1 0 0 MURSKA(35) 0 5 0 ERINIKA(73) 1 0 0
TOBIR(14) 1 0 0 JHANS(36) 1 0 0 DWES EG(82) 3 0 0
TALCAMA(18) 1 0 0 SIBIKHAS(37) 1 0 0 OLD VALAMANTIS(96) 2 0 1
SUNSET(21) 0 2 0 CLIFFHOME(38) 0 1 0 SHADOW GROVE(97) 1 1 0
CALEAM(26) 0 1 0 TRICORUS(51) 1 0 0 SOUTH RIDGE(99) 1 1 0
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
MISS TEAK 1-8015 34 29 1 187 SEA DOGS (1442) MORDANT
HIDA YAKAMO 7-5052 20 7 0 74 CALL TO THUNDER (1217) BONSUR
ABBOTT 14-4131 20 14 2 82 OTAGO HIGHLANDERS (1444) TOBIR
SHEWISH WHALER 18-9272 33 15 1 166 SEA DOGS (426) TALCAMA
GOLDENBEARD 21-6202 35 10 1 191 SEA DOGS (1446) SUNSET
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
HEART BREAKER 26-4752 18 11 0 61 ULTRA-VIOLENT (1458) CALEAM
U.S.S. ARIZONA 34-2643 30 23 1 160 D-DAY SQUAD (1449) MONUNTIAL
CADAL 35-1370 53 108 4 146 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415) MURSKA
PATCH 36-7297 26 16 0 93 SEA DOGS (1450) JHANS
BATMUN 37-2634 40 20 0 198 ALL THE MUN'S MEN (355) SIBIKHAS
GAR & BRILL 38-4252 72 111 0 135 JUST BECAUSE (1228) CLIFFHOME
BILGE RAT 51-5334 28 6 1 97 SEA DOGS (1440) TRICORUS
KISSYFUR 67-2187 30 22 1 169 ALL-STAR NANA'S (1451) BARIKALA
KARATIA 73-3624 24 12 1 74 KIWI CONNECTION (1453) ERINIKA
PRISONER 0103 82--31803 36 61 0 146 DUNGEON CELL 21 (1455) DWES EG
BLOODY BRAINLESS 96-2206 33 28 5 308 BLOODY RANDOMNESS (1405) OLD VALAMANTIS
SNOTMAN 97-2611 26 13 6 198 COLLUSION (1426) SHADOW GROVE
JAMES MADISON 99-1268 33 18 3 205 DEAD PRESIDENTS, YO (1412) SOUTH RIDGE