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Date   : 04/27/2011    Duedate: 05/10/2011

HOME GUARD

DM-101    TURN-557

RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %  RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %
  1 SEA DOGS 1/1442       571  381  5 60.0      ZOMBIE SQUAD 3 98/1498                
    SEA DOGS 18/426                             ZOMBIE SQUAD II II 68/1495            
    DUNGEON CELL 42/1470                      3 ARROGANCE 18/755      473  666 10 41.5
    DUNGEON CELL 4 82/1487                      UNDER DURESS 64/741                   
    SEA DOGS 21/1446                          4 CHILDREN OF  35/1415  727 1218  8 37.4
    DUNGEON CELL 97 82/1497                   5-PHILANTHROPI 35/1374    2   16  0 11.1
  2 SERPENTS HOL 22/1505   68   69  0 49.6      PHILANTHROPISTS 81/1504               

    '##/###' Avoid teams by their Team Id     '-'  Team did not fight this turn

                             REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER

     Aaah, those speech-writers!  What do they know?  Listen to this:

     "Much has changed in HOME GUARD since last I was here."  Nope, not much change
at all.  "Never fear, Olaf Modeen adapts to many situations, as do all successful
fighters."  True.  "What's with YELLOWBEARD?  He actually beat UNDER DURESS'
BLACKMAIL, and walked away with 27 more points from the fight."  Good job.  "Major
screwup at UNDER DURESS.  BLACKMAIL lost 18 points to YELLOWBEARD.  Some new
strategies, perhaps?  Maybe BLACKMAIL will provide more easy wins..."  You wish!
"Try as he might, MATH OP OWAIN wasn't good enough at persuading CHATTY CABALIST to
step down from the Duelmaster's throne..."  If that was trying hard, well, I just
don't believe it.  "I suppose you want to hear some rumors and dirty gossip about
your fellow fighters?  Tough!"  Because nobody's doing anything down and dirty here.
     "Speaking of cowardly avoiders and unfair challenges..."  No challenges, no
avoids.  Eleven fights total, two with standbys.
     "There have been some calls to lengthen the time limit.  Do you want the
fighters to walk away, or not?"  I never did get this.  Granted, there's been some
talk of sending in lions when the fights run over ten minutes; give the fans a
thrill.  "Is it my imagination, or are fighters getting younger every day?  To die so
young, so gloriously!"  In Home Guard?  Few are young and none die for keeps.
     "Who knows what the future holds for a warrior.  More fights, there's no doubt.
Are you as tired of reading this as I am of writing it?  Actually, I guess I'm
writing it before you read it.  Oh, well.  Remember--a good fighter needs both good
skills and good luck.  Until next time."  Yep.

In brief:
     LAZY LOOKOUT (42-4504) (25-23-1,35) of DUNGEON CELL fought B&G BOUNCER (101-3)
(0-0-0,30) of Miscellaneous Odds and Bods.  LAZY LOOKOUT demolished B&G BOUNCER in a
1 minute mismatched match.
     PRISONER 0484 (82-49671) (27-51-1,86) of DUNGEON CELL 97 fought MEAN SPIRIT
(101-5) (0-0-0,70) of Miscellaneous Odds and Bods.  PRISONER 0484 overpowered MEAN
SPIRIT in a popular 1 minute gory uneven match.
     DOMINION (98-2058) (11-18-3,46) of ZOMBIE SQUAD 3 fought SURLY DECKHAND (21-
6568) (41-51-1,56) of SEA DOGS.  DOMINION was savagely defeated by SURLY DECKHAND in
an action packed 3 minute duel.
     OWAIN HARLSON (35-3130) (52-90-1,125) of CHILDREN OF LLYR fought MANIPULATOR
(64-3490) (37-62-5,148) of UNDER DURESS.  OWAIN HARLSON was vanquished by MANIPULATOR
in a 1 minute uneven duel.
     HUW AP HUW (35-3030) (39-110-1,141) of CHILDREN OF LLYR fought ASSUR (18-7821)
(25-72-2,92) of ARROGANCE.  HUW AP HUW overcame ASSUR in a 3 minute melee.

     HOFFA (18-9369) (22-39-0,105) of ARROGANCE fought PRISONER R02 (82-51078) (37-
41-1,128) of DUNGEON CELL 4.  HOFFA was devastated by PRISONER R02 in a 2 minute one-
sided competition.
     HOFFA (18-8478) (15-71-1,117) of ARROGANCE fought PLANKTON (18-9748) (23-21-
2,100) of SEA DOGS.  HOFFA was devastated by PLANKTON in a crowd pleasing 2 minute
brutal one-sided duel.
     YELLOWBEARD (18-2149) (27-17-0,112) of SEA DOGS fought BLACKMAIL (64-3917) (35-
46-0,150) of UNDER DURESS.  YELLOWBEARD defeated BLACKMAIL in a crowd pleasing 3
minute match.
     SPARE ANCHOR (18-9610) (51-28-1,248) of SEA DOGS fought SMOKE (68-5868) (35-22-
0,197) of ZOMBIE SQUAD II II.  SPARE ANCHOR viciously subdued SMOKE in a unpopular 19
minute gory brawl.
     HORTATOR (1-7791) (43-38-3,227) of SEA DOGS fought TAVIS CADFALSON (35-1419)
(62-140-3,197) of CHILDREN OF LLYR.  HORTATOR was demolished by TAVIS CADFALSON in a
popular 1 minute one-sided melee.

For the title:
     CHATTY CABALIST (42-4488) (44-18-3,272) of DUNGEON CELL fought MATH OP OWAIN
(35-1418) (76-126-1,194) of CHILDREN OF LLYR.  CHATTY CABALIST devastated MATH OP
OWAIN in a 1 minute mismatched Title fight.

                                        Olaf

CAPTAIN OF THE GUARD          W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 CHATTY CABALIST 42-4488     45  18  3  281  DUNGEON CELL (1470)        RODEKI

GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS    W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 SPARE ANCHOR 18-9610        52  28  1  256  SEA DOGS (426)             TALCAMA
 TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419     63 140  3  213  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA

GRAND CHAMPIONS               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 SMOKE 68-5868               35  23  0  200  ZOMBIE SQUAD II II (1495)  FIREHOLD
 MATH OP OWAIN 35-1418       76 127  1  193  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA
 HORTATOR 1-7791             43  39  3  188  SEA DOGS (1442)            MORDANT

GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS       W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 MANIPULATOR 64-3490         38  62  5  153  UNDER DURESS (741)         KURUKAR

GRAND ADEPTS                  W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 HUW AP HUW 35-3030          40 110  1  143  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA
 YELLOWBEARD 18-2149         28  17  0  139  SEA DOGS (426)             TALCAMA
 PRISONER R02 82--14458      38  41  1  133  DUNGEON CELL 4 (1487)      DWES EG
 BLACKMAIL 64-3917           35  47  0  132  UNDER DURESS (741)         KURUKAR
 PLANKTON 18-9748            24  21  2  122  SEA DOGS (426)             TALCAMA
 OWAIN HARLSON 35-3130       52  91  1  121  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA
 HOFFA 18-9369               22  40  0  101  ARROGANCE (755)            TALCAMA

GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES    W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 ASSUR 18-7821               25  73  2  100  ARROGANCE (755)            TALCAMA
 HOFFA 18-8478               15  72  1   99  ARROGANCE (755)            TALCAMA
 PRISONER 0484 82--15865     28  51  1   95  DUNGEON CELL 97 (1497)     DWES EG

GRAND INITIATES               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
-ONYB ENGLVAR 81-903         20  20  0   62  PHILANTHROPISTS (1504)     SHADOWSPIRE
 SURLY DECKHAND 21-6568      42  51  1   61  SEA DOGS (1446)            SUNSET
-STOWAWAY 18-9722            29  29  4   55  SEA DOGS (426)             TALCAMA
 DOMINION 98-2058            11  19  3   45  ZOMBIE SQUAD 3 (1498)      SYVYN'S HILL
 LAZY LOOKOUT 42-4504        26  23  1   44  DUNGEON CELL (1470)        RODEKI

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                   W   L  K TEAM NAME              SLAIN BY                  TURN

                               PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE

This personal contains no information.  You need not read it.  It exists only to
convince hal that the critical parts of the newsletter are present and ready to
print.

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

CHATTY CABALIST devastated MATH OP OWAIN in a 1 minute mismatched Title fight.
HORTATOR was demolished by TAVIS CADFALSON in a popular 1 minute one-sided melee.
SPARE ANCHOR viciously subdued SMOKE in a unpopular 19 minute gory brawl.
YELLOWBEARD defeated BLACKMAIL in a crowd pleasing 3 minute match.
HOFFA was devastated by PLANKTON in a crowd pleasing 2 minute brutal one-sided duel.
HOFFA was devastated by PRISONER R02 in a 2 minute one-sided competition.
HUW AP HUW overcame ASSUR in a 3 minute melee.
OWAIN HARLSON was vanquished by MANIPULATOR in a 1 minute uneven duel.
DOMINION was savagely defeated by SURLY DECKHAND in a action packed 3 minute duel.
PRISONER 0484 overpowered MEAN SPIRIT in a popular 1 minute gory uneven match.
LAZY LOOKOUT demolished B&G BOUNCER in a 1 minute mismatched match.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|BASHING ATTACK                   4         AIMED BLOW        34 -  16 -  0      68  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      4         TOTAL PARRY       19 -  10 -  0      66  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      3         SLASHING ATTACK   14 -   8 -  0      64  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     3         BASHING ATTACK    11 -  10 -  0      52  |
|AIMED BLOW                       2         PARRY-LUNGE        5 -   8 -  0      38  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   1         LUNGING ATTACK     8 -  13 -  0      38  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  1         STRIKING ATTACK   11 -  23 -  0      32  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    1         PARRY-STRIKE      10 -  21 -  0      32  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  1         WALL OF STEEL      1 -   6 -  0      14  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    0         PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -   1 -  0       0  |

Turn 557 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

AIMED BLOW         2 -  0     PARRY-STRIKE       1 -  2         2  TOTAL PARRY    
LUNGING ATTACK     1 -  0     TOTAL PARRY        1 -  3         2  PARRY-STRIKE   
SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  0     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  0         2  BASHING ATTACK 
WALL OF STEEL      1 -  0     STRIKING ATTACK    0 -  1         2  PARRY-LUNGE    
PARRY-LUNGE        2 -  1                                       1  SLASHING ATTACK
BASHING ATTACK     2 -  2                                       1  LUNGING ATTACK 
                                                                1  WALL OF STEEL  

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
SLASHING ATTACK  CHATTY CABALIST 42-4488    45  18  3  281 DUNGEON CELL (1470)
TOTAL PARRY      SPARE ANCHOR 18-9610       52  28  1  256 SEA DOGS (426)
LUNGING ATTACK   TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419    63 140  3  213 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)
PARRY-STRIKE     MATH OP OWAIN 35-1418      76 127  1  193 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)
BASHING ATTACK   HORTATOR 1-7791            43  39  3  188 SEA DOGS (1442)
WALL OF STEEL    YELLOWBEARD 18-2149        28  17  0  139 SEA DOGS (426)
PARRY-LUNGE      BLACKMAIL 64-3917          35  47  0  132 UNDER DURESS (741)
STRIKING ATTACK  OWAIN HARLSON 35-3130      52  91  1  121 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)

The overall popularity leader is TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419.  The most popular warrior 
this turn was SURLY DECKHAND 21-6568.  The ten other most popular fighters were 
YELLOWBEARD 18-2149, BLACKMAIL 64-3917, PLANKTON 18-9748, PRISONER 0484 82--15865, 
HUW AP HUW 35-3030, SMOKE 68-5868, PRISONER R02 82--14458, ASSUR 18-7821, CHATTY 
CABALIST 42-4488, and TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419.

The least popular fighter this week was SPARE ANCHOR 18-9610.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were OWAIN HARLSON 35-3130, HOFFA 18-9369, HOFFA 18-8478, HORTATOR 
1-7791, LAZY LOOKOUT 42-4504, MATH OP OWAIN 35-1418, DOMINION 98-2058, MANIPULATOR 
64-3490, TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419, and CHATTY CABALIST 42-4488.

Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  
MORDANT(1)           0  1 0  MURSKA(35)           2  2 0  FIREHOLD(68)         0  1 0  
TALCAMA(18)          3  3 0  RODEKI(42)           2  0 0  DWES EG(82)          2  0 0  
SUNSET(21)           1  0 0  KURUKAR(64)          1  1 0  SYVYN'S HILL(98)     0  1 0  

TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 HORTATOR 1-7791             43  39  3  188  SEA DOGS (1442)            MORDANT
 SPARE ANCHOR 18-9610        52  28  1  256  SEA DOGS (426)             TALCAMA
 SURLY DECKHAND 21-6568      42  51  1   61  SEA DOGS (1446)            SUNSET
 TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419     63 140  3  213  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA
 CHATTY CABALIST 42-4488     45  18  3  281  DUNGEON CELL (1470)        RODEKI
 MANIPULATOR 64-3490         38  62  5  153  UNDER DURESS (741)         KURUKAR
 SMOKE 68-5868               35  23  0  200  ZOMBIE SQUAD II II (1495)  FIREHOLD
 PRISONER R02 82--14458      38  41  1  133  DUNGEON CELL 4 (1487)      DWES EG
 DOMINION 98-2058            11  19  3   45  ZOMBIE SQUAD 3 (1498)      SYVYN'S HILL