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Date   : 08/03/2011    Duedate: 08/16/2011

HOME GUARD

DM-101    TURN-564

RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %  RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %
  1 PYROMANIA 82/1508       3    1  0 75.0      PRIMATES-R-US 25/1135                 
    STATE OF MIND 3/1509                        USELESS TOOLS 54/735                  
  2-ARCANE POWER 7/1316   166   92  1 64.3      ROYAL FLUSH 47/146                    
    THE MOTHERSHIP 6 63/1349                  5 NO RESPECT I 82/1399  363  331  4 52.3
    TERRAPIN STATION 10/598                     SUGAR AND SPICE 7/1231                
    SERPENTINE INC. 22/802                      PERFECTION QUEST 98/1204              
  3 SEA DOGS 1/1442       610  393  5 60.8    6 SERPENTS HOL 22/1505   77   76  0 50.3
    SEA DOGS 18/426                             ZOMBIE SQUAD II II 68/1495            
    DUNGEON CELL 4 82/1487                      ZOMBIE SQUAD 3 98/1498                
    DUNGEON CELL 42/1470                      7 ARROGANCE 18/755      483  691 10 41.1
    SEA DOGS 35/1502                            UNDER DURESS 64/741                   
    SEA DOGS 21/1446                          8 YAMA BUSHI 30/275      43   68  0 38.7
    DUNGEON CELL 97 82/1497                     WIZARD'S WRATH 5/1464                 
  4-NOT QUITE 59/1237    1072  937 16 53.4    9 CHILDREN OF  35/1415  736 1237  8 37.3

    '##/###' Avoid teams by their Team Id     '-'  Team did not fight this turn

                                 THE GUARDIAN'S FORUM
                       Reflections by the Captain of the Guard

     It take a great deal to get me moving.  Immoveable Object is apparently a great
deal of something.  I have no wish to square off against it, so I will be challenging
Math Op Owain and avoiding Not Quite.

Spare Anchor

                             REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER

     Okay, I can't put this off any longer.  Here's a spy report.
     Biggest point movements, Sugarbeet up seventeen, Assur down sixteen, same fight.
     Most avoided, Not Quite.  Most avoiding, Sea Dogs.
     Most challenged, no name given, must be a tie.
     Fourteen fights, two standbys, three challenges.

     GOSSAMER (98-407) (8-8-4,47) of PERFECTION QUEST fought HAMMERHEAD (35-4129)
(22-22-2,59) of SEA DOGS.  GOSSAMER was handily defeated by HAMMERHEAD in a 1 minute
mismatched bout.  There's the thing, Gos thought "hammerhead" was a physical
description of his opponent.  Nope, it was a description of his opponent's technique.
     HALIBUTT (5-4866) (25-22-0,75) of WIZARD'S WRATH fought THOME (22-6848) (18-0-
0,73) of SERPENTS HOLD.  HALIBUTT was viciously subdued by THOME in a crowd pleasing
2 minute gruesome bout.  This is when you should have been tuna or even cod,
Halibutt.
     DOMINION (98-2058) (14-22-3,63) of ZOMBIE SQUAD 3 fought B&G BOUNCER (101-3) (0-
0-0,30) of Bored Standbys.  DOMINION luckily beat B&G BOUNCER in a crowd pleasing 2
minute gory conflict.  And luck it was.  The Bouncer is amazingly fast with bung-
starter, not to mention the off-hand tankard.
     DILL WEED (7-5241) (13-5-0,44) of SUGAR AND SPICE fought HOFFA (18-8478) (15-78-
1,43) of ARROGANCE.  DILL WEED viciously subdued HOFFA in an exciting 2 minute bloody
battle.  Everyone beats Hoffa.  Makes you wonder how the poor dope graduated.
     ASSUR (18-7821) (27-77-2,123) of ARROGANCE fought SUGARBEET (7-5219) (34-38-
1,112) of SUGAR AND SPICE.  ASSUR was demolished by SUGARBEET in a crowd pleasing 1
minute mismatched match.  As noted, the biggest point movements resulted from this
one.
     PUMPING ON STEELE (82-33221) (19-24-0,137) of NO RESPECT II fought HUW AP HUW
(35-3030) (43-113-1,140) of CHILDREN OF LLYR.  PUMPING ON STEELE was overpowered by
HUW AP HUW in a popular 3 minute uneven match.  By the gods, that's TWO WINS IN A ROW
for Huw!  Maybe he really IS starting a streak.

     PRISONER 0484 (82-49671) (33-52-1,132) of DUNGEON CELL 97 fought LORETTA (101-8)
(0-0-0,110) of Bored Standbys.  PRISONER 0484 was savagely defeated by LORETTA in an
action packed 3 minute gory duel.  Loretta can be like that.  You probably didn't tip
her well.
     MANIPULATOR (64-3490) (41-65-5,169) of UNDER DURESS fought SURLY DECKHAND (21-
6568) (46-53-1,106) of SEA DOGS.  MANIPULATOR viciously subdued SURLY DECKHAND in an
action packed 1 minute duel.  I dunno, should we leave this Manipulator loose here?
     PRISONER R02 (82-51078) (43-42-1,170) of DUNGEON CELL 4 fought OWAIN HARLSON
(35-3130) (53-96-1,110) of CHILDREN OF LLYR.  PRISONER R02 overpowered OWAIN HARLSON
in a popular 1 minute mismatched brawl.  No surprise.  Did anyone happen to notice
that Owain is a red-headed stepchild?  Fact.  My spies brought me evidence.  He dyes
his hair to keep it from showing red.
     CHATTY CABALIST (42-4488) (48-21-3,198) of DUNGEON CELL fought SMOKE (68-5868)
(38-26-0,198) of ZOMBIE SQUAD II II.  CHATTY CABALIST viciously subdued SMOKE in a
popular 2 minute bloody duel.  Well, what can I say?  No Zombie has any conversation,
you want conversation from the dead, you have to give 'em a chance to practice, and
what chance has Smoke had?
     HORTATOR (1-7791) (47-40-3,203) of SEA DOGS fought BLACKMAIL (64-3917) (38-50-
0,170) of UNDER DURESS.  HORTATOR subdued BLACKMAIL in a 2 minute competition.
Nothing like a drumstick to the head.

     WARHEAD (82-13913) (28-11-0,135) of PYROMANIA challenged HOFFA (18-9369) (23-45-
0,138) of ARROGANCE.  Up 3.  WARHEAD devastated HOFFA in a popular 1 minute one-sided
Challenge contest.  The Hoffas, easy wins.  Even better than the standbys.
     SAN YANDO (30-576) (32-31-1,182) of YAMA BUSHI challenged TAVIS CADFALSON (35-
1419) (65-144-3,202) of CHILDREN OF LLYR.  Up 20.  SAN YANDO unbelievably bested
TAVIS CADFALSON in a popular 3 minute Challenge match.  What's unbelievable about
this?  Tavis spends more time in his smithy than he does in the practice yard, and it
shows.

And for the title, as promised, SPARE ANCHOR (18-9610) (58-28-1,294) of SEA DOGS
challenged MATH OP OWAIN (35-1418) (78-131-1,216) of CHILDREN OF LLYR.  Down 78.
SPARE ANCHOR devastated MATH OP OWAIN in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge Title fight.
So Spare remains the Captain of the Guard, and we hope he will grant us a few more
words in two weeks.  That isn't much to ask, is it, a few words every two weeks?

                                        Olaf

CAPTAIN OF THE GUARD          W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 SPARE ANCHOR 18-9610        59  28  1  304  SEA DOGS (426)             TALCAMA

GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS    W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
-IMMOVEABLE OBJECT 59-2110   36  13  1  215  NOT QUITE (1237)           ILLIS
 CHATTY CABALIST 42-4488     49  21  3  212  DUNGEON CELL (1470)        RODEKI

GRAND CHAMPIONS               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 HORTATOR 1-7791             48  40  3  205  SEA DOGS (1442)            MORDANT
-PHONELESS CORD 54-2018      37  22  0  205  USELESS TOOLS (735)        TROCAR
 SMOKE 68-5868               38  27  0  201  ZOMBIE SQUAD II II (1495)  FIREHOLD
 MATH OP OWAIN 35-1418       78 132  1  199  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA
 SAN YANDO 30-576            33  31  1  197  YAMA BUSHI (275)           IAYE
-PERFECT TEN 47-4218         35  31  1  196  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
 TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419     65 145  3  190  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA

GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS       W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
-JOE KING 47-2223            35  57  1  181  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK

GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS       W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 BLACKMAIL 64-3917           38  51  0  175  UNDER DURESS (741)         KURUKAR
 PRISONER R02 82--14458      44  42  1  172  DUNGEON CELL 4 (1487)      DWES EG
-DON KING 47-5374            28  28  3  172  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
 MANIPULATOR 64-3490         42  65  5  171  UNDER DURESS (741)         KURUKAR
-YELLOWBEARD 18-2149         33  17  0  166  SEA DOGS (426)             TALCAMA
 HUW AP HUW 35-3030          44 113  1  152  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA

GRAND ADEPTS                  W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 WARHEAD 82-13913            29  11  0  148  PYROMANIA (1508)           DWES EG
 HOFFA 18-9369               23  46  0  131  ARROGANCE (755)            TALCAMA
 SUGARBEET 7-5219            35  38  1  129  SUGAR AND SPICE (1231)     BONSUR
 PUMPING ON STEEL 82--32315  19  25  0  128  NO RESPECT II (1399)       DWES EG
 PRISONER 0484 82--15865     33  53  1  119  DUNGEON CELL 97 (1497)     DWES EG
 SURLY DECKHAND 21-6568      46  54  1  117  SEA DOGS (1446)            SUNSET
 OWAIN HARLSON 35-3130       53  97  1  116  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA
 ASSUR 18-7821               27  78  2  107  ARROGANCE (755)            TALCAMA

GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES    W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
-AFRICAN QUEEN 47-6424       18  15  0   91  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK

GRAND INITIATES               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
-MONKEY DO 25-4152           22  18  2   85  PRIMATES-R-US (1135)       LYRATILAN
-ACE BAILEY 47-4948          20  24  0   84  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
 THOME 22-6848               19   0  0   84  SERPENTS HOLD (1505)       SOLVEN
-TIFFINAL 5-4865             24  22  2   78  WIZARD'S WRATH (1464)      KALTOS
 HALIBUTT 5-4866             25  23  0   74  WIZARD'S WRATH (1464)      KALTOS
-CELTIC DRUID 7-5043         14   6  0   71  ARCANE POWER (1316)        BONSUR
 HAMMERHEAD 35-4129          23  22  2   66  SEA DOGS (1502)            MURSKA
-MONTY PYTHON 22-5939        21   8  0   66  SERPENTINE INC. (802)      SOLVEN
 DOMINION 98-2058            15  22  3   65  ZOMBIE SQUAD 3 (1498)      SYVYN'S HILL
-50/50 36-5603               19   4  0   61  SKATE DRAGONS (1322)       JHANS
-MARCH MADNESS 10-4145       21   9  0   58  TERRAPIN STATION (598)     KOLACT
-BULLPEN ACE 47-5907         22  14  3   56  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
 DILL WEED 7-5241            14   5  0   52  SUGAR AND SPICE (1231)     BONSUR
-JACK KNIFE 47-6694          15  11  1   51  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
-BLACK ARCANUM 63-2509        4   2  0   51  THE MOTHERSHIP 6 (1349)    AMEN-TEI
-A.O. HELL 54-2523           24  11  2   50  USELESS TOOLS (735)        TROCAR
-STOWAWAY 18-9722            29  30  4   40  SEA DOGS (426)             TALCAMA
 HOFFA 18-8478               15  79  1   40  ARROGANCE (755)            TALCAMA
 GOSSAMER 98-407              8   9  4   40  PERFECTION QUEST (1204)    SYVYN'S HILL
-AMPUTATOR FROG 99-3206       9   0  4   31  BLOOD FROG 3 (1511)        SOUTH RIDGE
-RABID TOAD 98-2767           8   2  4   30  BLOOD FROGS 2 (1510)       SYVYN'S HILL

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                   W   L  K TEAM NAME              SLAIN BY                  TURN

                               PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE

Warhead -- Thanks for the last Attack skill.  It only took 99 fights for that to
happen.  Now I can train some stats in preparation for the Freshman. -- Surly
Deckhand

     Are you still fresh?

Prisoner 0484 -- Yep, you see?  Olaf was right, but I was righter.  I *can* win
fights.  My streak is just beginning. -- Huw ap Huw

Manipulator -- I would NEVER allow you to... manipulate... me like THAT!  Not even
for a win. -- Owain Harlson

Perfect Ten -- Actually, I'd rather have been vicious to Olaf.  Calling me "almost
competent"!  Besides, he answers when someone addresses him. -- Math op Owain

     Rotten habit, I'll have to work on breaking it. -- Olaf

Spare Anchor -- Let Olaf be surprised and make disparaging remarks.  I take it as a
complement that it "took you that long."  I'm improving, anyone can see that. --
Tavis Cadfalson

     Right, it's amazing.

13 July 11
                                   Announcing!

          The No-Tourney ADM arena will be opening for business on the
          first of August of this year!
     It will be ADM Arena #107, making use of that idle installation down at Lirin
Kiv.  If the managers involved in this arena wish to rename it, suggestions will be
entertained through the months of August and September.

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

SPARE ANCHOR devastated MATH OP OWAIN in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge Title fight.
SAN YANDO unbelievably bested TAVIS CADFALSON in a popular 3 minute Challenge match.
WARHEAD devastated HOFFA in a popular 1 minute one-sided Challenge contest.
HORTATOR subdued BLACKMAIL in a 2 minute competition.
CHATTY CABALIST viciously subdued SMOKE in a popular 2 minute bloody duel.
PRISONER R02 overpowered OWAIN HARLSON in a popular 1 minute mismatched brawl.
MANIPULATOR viciously subdued SURLY DECKHAND in a action packed 1 minute duel.
PRISONER 0484 was savagely defeated by LORETTA in a action packed 3 minute gory duel.
PUMPING ON STEELE was overpowered by HUW AP HUW in a popular 3 minute uneven match.
ASSUR was demolished by SUGARBEET in a crowd pleasing 1 minute mismatched match.
DILL WEED viciously subdued HOFFA in a exciting 2 minute bloody battle.
DOMINION luckily beat B&G BOUNCER in a crowd pleasing 2 minute gory conflict.
HALIBUTT was viciously subdued by THOME in a crowd pleasing 2 minute gruesome bout.
GOSSAMER was handily defeated by HAMMERHEAD in a 1 minute mismatched bout.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|BASHING ATTACK                   6         SLASHING ATTACK    9 -   4 -  0      69  |
|AIMED BLOW                       4         AIMED BLOW        29 -  16 -  0      64  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      4         PARRY-LUNGE        9 -   6 -  0      60  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     3         BASHING ATTACK    27 -  18 -  0      60  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  3         WALL OF STEEL     10 -   9 -  0      53  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      2         PARRY-STRIKE      14 -  16 -  0      47  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    2         TOTAL PARRY       14 -  21 -  0      40  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  1         PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -   2 -  0      33  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   1         STRIKING ATTACK    8 -  17 -  0      32  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    0         LUNGING ATTACK     6 -  13 -  0      32  |

Turn 564 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  0     AIMED BLOW         1 -  3         2  TOTAL PARRY    
PARRY-STRIKE       2 -  1     TOTAL PARRY        1 -  3         2  AIMED BLOW     
STRIKING ATTACK    2 -  1     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  0         2  BASHING ATTACK 
BASHING ATTACK     4 -  2     LUNGING ATTACK     0 -  1         2  WALL OF STEEL  
PARRY-LUNGE        1 -  1                                       1  SLASHING ATTACK
WALL OF STEEL      1 -  1                                       1  PARRY-STRIKE   
                                                                1  LUNGING ATTACK 

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
TOTAL PARRY      SPARE ANCHOR 18-9610       59  28  1  304 SEA DOGS (426)
SLASHING ATTACK  CHATTY CABALIST 42-4488    49  21  3  212 DUNGEON CELL (1470)
BASHING ATTACK   HORTATOR 1-7791            48  40  3  205 SEA DOGS (1442)
PARRY-STRIKE     MATH OP OWAIN 35-1418      78 132  1  199 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)
WALL OF STEEL    SAN YANDO 30-576           33  31  1  197 YAMA BUSHI (275)
LUNGING ATTACK   TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419    65 145  3  190 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)
PARRY-LUNGE      BLACKMAIL 64-3917          38  51  0  175 UNDER DURESS (741)
STRIKING ATTACK  OWAIN HARLSON 35-3130      53  97  1  116 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)
AIMED BLOW       HALIBUTT 5-4866            25  23  0   74 WIZARD'S WRATH (1464)

The overall popularity leader is TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419.  The most popular warrior 
this turn was TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419.  The ten other most popular fighters were 
CHATTY CABALIST 42-4488, HUW AP HUW 35-3030, THOME 22-6848, PRISONER 0484 82--15865, 
DILL WEED 7-5241, MATH OP OWAIN 35-1418, SAN YANDO 30-576, HORTATOR 1-7791, WARHEAD 
82-13913, and PRISONER R02 82--14458.

The least popular fighter this week was GOSSAMER 98-407.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were HOFFA 18-8478, SURLY DECKHAND 21-6568, OWAIN HARLSON 35-3130, HOFFA 
18-9369, HAMMERHEAD 35-4129, HALIBUTT 5-4866, ASSUR 18-7821, PUMPING ON STEELE 
82--32315, BLACKMAIL 64-3917, and SPARE ANCHOR 18-9610.

Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  
MORDANT(1)           1  0 0  SOLVEN(22)           1  0 0  KURUKAR(64)          1  1 0  
KALTOS(5)            0  1 0  IAYE(30)             1  0 0  FIREHOLD(68)         0  1 0  
BONSUR(7)            2  0 0  MURSKA(35)           2  3 0  DWES EG(82)          2  2 0  
TALCAMA(18)          1  3 0  RODEKI(42)           1  0 0  SYVYN'S HILL(98)     1  1 0  
SUNSET(21)           0  1 0  

TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 HORTATOR 1-7791             48  40  3  205  SEA DOGS (1442)            MORDANT
 HALIBUTT 5-4866             25  23  0   74  WIZARD'S WRATH (1464)      KALTOS
 SUGARBEET 7-5219            35  38  1  129  SUGAR AND SPICE (1231)     BONSUR
 SPARE ANCHOR 18-9610        59  28  1  304  SEA DOGS (426)             TALCAMA
 SURLY DECKHAND 21-6568      46  54  1  117  SEA DOGS (1446)            SUNSET
 THOME 22-6848               19   0  0   84  SERPENTS HOLD (1505)       SOLVEN
 SAN YANDO 30-576            33  31  1  197  YAMA BUSHI (275)           IAYE
 MATH OP OWAIN 35-1418       78 132  1  199  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA
 CHATTY CABALIST 42-4488     49  21  3  212  DUNGEON CELL (1470)        RODEKI
 BLACKMAIL 64-3917           38  51  0  175  UNDER DURESS (741)         KURUKAR
 SMOKE 68-5868               38  27  0  201  ZOMBIE SQUAD II II (1495)  FIREHOLD
 PRISONER R02 82--14458      44  42  1  172  DUNGEON CELL 4 (1487)      DWES EG
 DOMINION 98-2058            15  22  3   65  ZOMBIE SQUAD 3 (1498)      SYVYN'S HILL

                             * * * * *   MEMO  * * * * *

From:       The Office of Accurate Census Reporting, Gladiatorial Commission
To:         All Managers

In the interest of preserving our natural resources and preventing managerial writer's 
cramp, census forms will be provided for warriors by request only, effective 
immediately.  Managers may register their warriors' races and/or favorite sayings by 
simply writing them on a separate piece of paper and submitting them to the Commission.  
For any questions, please contact the Gladiatorial Commission.