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Date   : 09/14/2011    Duedate: 09/27/2011

HOME GUARD

DM-101    TURN-567

RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %  RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %
  1 PYROMANIA 82/1508       6    1  0 85.7    6 NO RESPECT I 82/1399  366  336  4 52.1
  2 ARCANE POWER 7/1316   168   96  1 63.6      SUGAR AND SPICE 7/1231                
    SERPENTINE INC. 22/802                      PERFECTION QUEST 98/1204              
    BLUNT FORCE 29/1512                       7 SERPENTS HOL 22/1505   82   80  0 50.6
  3 SEA DOGS 18/426       619  402  5 60.6      ZOMBIE SQUAD II II 68/1495            
    DUNGEON CELL 4 82/1487                      ZOMBIE SQUAD 3 98/1498                
    DUNGEON CELL 42/1470                      8 ARROGANCE 18/755      487  702 10 41.0
    SEA DOGS 21/1446                            UNDER DURESS 64/741                   
    DUNGEON CELL 97 82/1497                   9 YAMA BUSHI 30/275      46   74  0 38.3
    SEA DOGS 35/1502                            WIZARD'S WRATH 5/1464                 
  4 NOT QUITE 59/1237    1092  943 16 53.7   10 CHILDREN OF  35/1415  742 1243  8 37.4
    PRIMATES-R-US 25/1135                    11-DARQUE FORCE 50/1430   15   33  1 31.3
    USELESS TOOLS 54/735                     12-BLOOD FROG 3 99/1511    1    1  0 50.0
    ROYAL FLUSH 47/146                          BLOOD FROGS 2 98/1510                 
  5-DARK AT HEAR 21/1496   11   10  0 52.4

    '##/###' Avoid teams by their Team Id     '-'  Team did not fight this turn

                             REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER

     The Unknown Spymaster did the rough notes, and he annoyed the liver out of me.
Not that my liver's anything to write home about, me being dead and all, but still.
So this'll be short.  I figure you guys won't mind, probably won't even notice, eh?
     Greatest point gain:  Prisoner 0484, at thirty-nine.  Greatest loss, San Yando,
at thirty-six.  Same fight.
     Yama Bush was most avoided.  Useless Tools did most of the avoiding.
     Spare Anchor got the most challenges.
     Nineteen total fights, and only one standby!  This is good.  And ten of those
fights were challenges, more than half.  Also good.  Now if we can just get someone
to TALK here....

The fights:
     ACE OF BASE (47-6905) (14-8-0,66) of ROYAL FLUSH fought MEAN SPIRIT (101-5) (0-
0-0,70) of Local Thugs.  ACE OF BASE devastated MEAN SPIRIT in an action packed 1
minute brutal one-sided bout.  The only standby, and a relatively new arrival on the
Isle.  Maybe entirely new, I don't remember.  Anyway, Ace did a number on the Mean
Spirit, and everyone cheered.  Nobody likes that guy.
     HOFFA (18-8478) (16-80-1,44) of ARROGANCE fought HAMMERHEAD (35-4129) (23-24-
2,46) of SEA DOGS.  HOFFA defeated HAMMERHEAD in a crowd pleasing 2 minute conflict.
Oops!  That's got to be embarrassing.
     MONTY PYTHON (22-5939) (22-9-0,91) of SERPENTINE INC. fought THOME (22-6848)
(20-1-0,68) of SERPENTS HOLD.  MONTY PYTHON was overpowered by THOME in a 1 minute
one-sided bout.  Snakes.  Bleh.  Let 'em do for each other, see if *I* care.  I can't
stand snakes.
     SURLY DECKHAND (21-6568) (47-55-1,147) of SEA DOGS fought DOMINION (98-2058)
(17-22-3,91) of ZOMBIE SQUAD 3.  SURLY DECKHAND was viciously subdued by DOMINION in
an exciting 7 minute brutal fight.  Next time, Surly, try being polite.  Maybe you
can win fights, or at least lull your opponent, with honey.  Hmm, sounds kinky....

     MANIPULATOR (64-3490) (42-67-5,136) of UNDER DURESS fought OWAIN HARLSON (35-
3130) (54-98-1,107) of CHILDREN OF LLYR.  MANIPULATOR was bested by OWAIN HARLSON in
a 2 minute brawl.  What the...!  I heard it being booted around in the taverns that
the possession of more recognition points practically guaranteed a win, regardless of
actual fights, skills, all that stuff.  Looks like another hypothesis bites the dust.
     PRISONER R02 (82-51078) (45-43-1,148) of DUNGEON CELL 4 fought PUMPING ON STEELE
(82-33221) (19-26-0,127) of NO RESPECT II.  PRISONER R02 overpowered PUMPING ON
STEELE in a 2 minute uneven struggle.  So, does this mean we WILL have respect around
here?
     SAN YANDO (30-576) (33-33-1,179) of YAMA BUSHI fought PRISONER 0484 (82-49671)
(35-53-1,127) of DUNGEON CELL 97.  SAN YANDO was overpowered by PRISONER 0484 in a
popular 3 minute mismatched conflict.  This is the fight that produced the most
movement in the ranks.
     DON KING (47-5374) (29-29-3,176) of ROYAL FLUSH fought HUW AP HUW (35-3030) (45-
114-1,167) of CHILDREN OF LLYR.  DON KING demolished HUW AP HUW in a 1 minute
mismatched match.  So much for Huw's winning streak.  More of a dotted line.

The challenges:
     GOSSAMER (98-407) (9-9-4,46) of PERFECTION QUEST challenged CELTIC DRUID (7-
5043) (14-8-0,65) of ARCANE POWER.  Up 19.  GOSSAMER was handily defeated by CELTIC
DRUID in a 2 minute one-sided Challenge bout.  I think I asked last time, but nobody
answered, so, ARE there any non-Celtic druids?  Not that it matters, I suppose.  But
I do these spy reports, week in and week out, and my mind wanders.  After all, it 
isn't like I was using it HERE.
     HALIBUTT (5-4866) (26-24-0,69) of WIZARD'S WRATH challenged JACK KNIFE (47-6694)
(16-12-1,77) of ROYAL FLUSH.  Up 8.  HALIBUTT was viciously subdued by JACK KNIFE in
a popular 5 minute Challenge fight.  Minced fish.
     DILL WEED (7-5241) (14-6-0,45) of SUGAR AND SPICE challenged A.O. HELL (54-2523)
(25-12-2,69) of USELESS TOOLS.  Up 24.  DILL WEED was defeated by A.O. HELL in a 2
minute Challenge duel.  Who'da thought A.O. would bring a weed eater?
     MONKEY DO (25-4152) (24-18-2,100) of PRIMATES-R-US challenged ASSUR (18-7821)
(28-79-2,111) of ARROGANCE.  Up 11.  MONKEY DO vanquished ASSUR in a 1 minute uneven
Challenge duel.  There's a joke here, but I'm going to let you figure it out for
yourself.
     TIFFINAL (5-4865) (25-23-2,96) of WIZARD'S WRATH challenged HOFFA (18-9369) (24-
47-0,126) of ARROGANCE.  Up 30.  TIFFINAL overpowered HOFFA in a 1 minute uneven
Challenge melee.  Defeating Hoffa is said to be easy.  Was it?

     AFRICAN QUEEN (47-6424) (20-15-0,130) of ROYAL FLUSH challenged BLACKMAIL (64-
3917) (38-53-0,144) of UNDER DURESS.  Up 14.  AFRICAN QUEEN overpowered BLACKMAIL in
a 1 minute one-sided Challenge struggle.  Good!  Stand firm on your principles,
Queen, and refuse to pay!
     SUGARBEET (7-5219) (36-38-1,163) of SUGAR AND SPICE challenged SMOKE (68-5868)
(38-29-0,174) of ZOMBIE SQUAD II II.  Up 11.  SUGARBEET savagely defeated SMOKE in a
crowd pleasing 4 minute Challenge competition.  You know why the crowd was pleased?
'Cause Sugarbeet was throwing candies in the slow spots.  Lotta sweet tooths, sweet
teeth? out there.
     RUBBER BULLET (54-2503) (28-6-1,200) of USELESS TOOLS challenged CHATTY CABALIST
(42-4488) (51-21-3,250) of DUNGEON CELL.  Up 50.  RUBBER BULLET was vanquished by
CHATTY CABALIST in a 2 minute Challenge brawl.  Bold, but next time, use something
besides rubber.  You just bounced, RB.
     PHONELESS CORD (54-2018) (38-23-0,198) of USELESS TOOLS challenged MATH OP OWAIN
(35-1418) (79-133-1,203) of CHILDREN OF LLYR.  Up 5.  PHONELESS CORD was overcome by
MATH OP OWAIN in a popular 1 minute Challenge match.  Bit of a surprise, and the most
surprised were the bookies.  It's good for 'em.
     WARHEAD (82-13913) (31-11-0,197) of PYROMANIA challenged SPARE ANCHOR (18-9610)
(59-30-1,197) of SEA DOGS.  Straight across.  WARHEAD devastated SPARE ANCHOR in a 3
minute mismatched Challenge fight.  Exploded Anchor everywhere.  Good thing it was a
spare.

For the title:
     IMMOVEABLE OBJECT (59-2110) (38-13-1,249) of NOT QUITE fought TAVIS CADFALSON
(35-1419) (66-146-3,196) of CHILDREN OF LLYR.  IMMOVEABLE OBJECT luckily beat TAVIS
CADFALSON in a 3 minute Title competition.  Luck, was it?  That's gotta make you
wonder about a rematch.  But for now, congratulations to Immoveable.

                                        Olaf

CAPTAIN OF THE GUARD          W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 IMMOVEABLE OBJECT 59-2110   39  13  1  254  NOT QUITE (1237)           ILLIS

GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS    W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 CHATTY CABALIST 42-4488     52  21  3  274  DUNGEON CELL (1470)        RODEKI
 WARHEAD 82-13913            32  11  0  225  PYROMANIA (1508)           DWES EG
 MATH OP OWAIN 35-1418       80 133  1  216  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA

GRAND CHAMPIONS               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419     66 147  3  202  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA
 RUBBER BULLET 54-2503       28   7  1  198  USELESS TOOLS (735)        TROCAR
 PHONELESS CORD 54-2018      38  24  0  194  USELESS TOOLS (735)        TROCAR
 SPARE ANCHOR 18-9610        59  31  1  193  SEA DOGS (426)             TALCAMA
 DON KING 47-5374            30  29  3  184  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
 SUGARBEET 7-5219            37  38  1  182  SUGAR AND SPICE (1231)     BONSUR

GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS       W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 SMOKE 68-5868               38  30  0  166  ZOMBIE SQUAD II II (1495)  FIREHOLD
 PRISONER 0484 82--15865     36  53  1  166  DUNGEON CELL 97 (1497)     DWES EG
 HUW AP HUW 35-3030          45 115  1  159  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA
 PRISONER R02 82--14458      46  43  1  156  DUNGEON CELL 4 (1487)      DWES EG

GRAND ADEPTS                  W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 AFRICAN QUEEN 47-6424       21  15  0  148  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
 SAN YANDO 30-576            33  34  1  143  YAMA BUSHI (275)           IAYE
 BLACKMAIL 64-3917           38  54  0  129  UNDER DURESS (741)         KURUKAR
 OWAIN HARLSON 35-3130       55  98  1  128  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA
 DOMINION 98-2058            18  22  3  127  ZOMBIE SQUAD 3 (1498)      SYVYN'S HILL
 PUMPING ON STEEL 82--32315  19  27  0  123  NO RESPECT II (1399)       DWES EG
 TIFFINAL 5-4865             26  23  2  122  WIZARD'S WRATH (1464)      KALTOS
 SURLY DECKHAND 21-6568      47  56  1  117  SEA DOGS (1446)            SUNSET
 MANIPULATOR 64-3490         42  68  5  117  UNDER DURESS (741)         KURUKAR
 MONKEY DO 25-4152           25  18  2  116  PRIMATES-R-US (1135)       LYRATILAN
 HOFFA 18-9369               24  48  0  102  ARROGANCE (755)            TALCAMA

GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES    W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 ASSUR 18-7821               28  80  2   97  ARROGANCE (755)            TALCAMA
 THOME 22-6848               21   1  0   97  SERPENTS HOLD (1505)       SOLVEN

GRAND INITIATES               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 JACK KNIFE 47-6694          17  12  1   84  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
 ACE OF BASE 47-6905         15   8  0   79  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
 MONTY PYTHON 22-5939        22  10  0   74  SERPENTINE INC. (802)      SOLVEN
 A.O. HELL 54-2523           26  12  2   73  USELESS TOOLS (735)        TROCAR
-RUIN 21-6862                21  26  1   72  DARK AT HEART (1496)       SUNSET
 CELTIC DRUID 7-5043         15   8  0   71  ARCANE POWER (1316)        BONSUR
 HALIBUTT 5-4866             26  25  0   70  WIZARD'S WRATH (1464)      KALTOS
-RABID TOAD 98-2767           9   2  4   58  BLOOD FROGS 2 (1510)       SYVYN'S HILL
-OUTLAW STAR 39-3550         15   8  1   54  DARQUE ANGELS (1483)       XOCHITHLAN
 HOFFA 18-8478               17  80  1   51  ARROGANCE (755)            TALCAMA
 DILL WEED 7-5241            14   7  0   51  SUGAR AND SPICE (1231)     BONSUR
 HAMMERHEAD 35-4129          23  25  2   43  SEA DOGS (1502)            MURSKA
 GOSSAMER 98-407              9  10  4   43  PERFECTION QUEST (1204)    SYVYN'S HILL
-HYDROPONICUS 29-4605        12   4  0   40  BLUNT FORCE (1512)         LAPUR
-AMPUTATOR FROG 99-3206       9   1  4   30  BLOOD FROG 3 (1511)        SOUTH RIDGE

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                   W   L  K TEAM NAME              SLAIN BY                  TURN

                               PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE

This personal contains no information.  You need not read it.  It exists only to
convince hal that the critical parts of the newsletter are present and ready to
print.

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

WARHEAD devastated SPARE ANCHOR in a 3 minute mismatched Challenge fight.
PHONELESS CORD was overcome by MATH OP OWAIN in a popular 1 minute Challenge match.
RUBBER BULLET was vanquished by CHATTY CABALIST in a 2 minute Challenge brawl.
SUGARBEET savagely defeated SMOKE in a crowd pleasing 4 minute Challenge competition.
AFRICAN QUEEN overpowered BLACKMAIL in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge struggle.
TIFFINAL overpowered HOFFA in a 1 minute uneven Challenge melee.
MONKEY DO vanquished ASSUR in a 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
DILL WEED was defeated by A.O. HELL in a 2 minute Challenge duel.
HALIBUTT was viciously subdued by JACK KNIFE in a popular 5 minute Challenge fight.
GOSSAMER was handily defeated by CELTIC DRUID in a 2 minute one-sided Challenge bout.
IMMOVEABLE OBJECT luckily beat TAVIS CADFALSON in a 3 minute Title competition.
DON KING demolished HUW AP HUW in a 1 minute mismatched match.
SAN YANDO was overpowered by PRISONER 0484 in a popular 3 minute mismatched conflict.
PRISONER R02 overpowered PUMPING ON STEELE in a 2 minute uneven struggle.
MANIPULATOR was bested by OWAIN HARLSON in a 2 minute brawl.
SURLY DECKHAND was viciously subdued by DOMINION in a exciting 7 minute brutal fight.
MONTY PYTHON was overpowered by THOME in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
HOFFA defeated HAMMERHEAD in a crowd pleasing 2 minute conflict.
ACE OF BASE devastated MEAN SPIRIT in a action packed 1 minute brutal one-sided bout.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|AIMED BLOW                       7         SLASHING ATTACK   13 -   3 -  0      81  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   5         AIMED BLOW        33 -  21 -  0      61  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  4         STRIKING ATTACK   16 -  13 -  0      55  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      4         PARRY-STRIKE      17 -  14 -  0      55  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    4         BASHING ATTACK    26 -  25 -  0      51  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  3         WALL OF STEEL     13 -  13 -  0      50  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     3         LUNGING ATTACK    10 -  15 -  0      40  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   3         PARRY-LUNGE        7 -  11 -  0      39  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      3         TOTAL PARRY       14 -  26 -  0      35  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    1         PARRY-RIPOSTE      2 -   5 -  0      29  |

Turn 567 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

SLASHING ATTACK    3 -  0     PARRY-LUNGE        1 -  2         2  AIMED BLOW     
STRIKING ATTACK    4 -  0     TOTAL PARRY        1 -  3         2  PARRY-STRIKE   
PARRY-STRIKE       2 -  1     WALL OF STEEL      1 -  3         2  TOTAL PARRY    
LUNGING ATTACK     2 -  1     BASHING ATTACK     1 -  4         1  SLASHING ATTACK
AIMED BLOW         4 -  3     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  1         1  LUNGING ATTACK 
                                                                1  WALL OF STEEL  
                                                                1  STRIKING ATTACK
                                                                1  BASHING ATTACK 

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
AIMED BLOW       IMMOVEABLE OBJECT 59-2110  39  13  1  254 NOT QUITE (1237)
SLASHING ATTACK  CHATTY CABALIST 42-4488    52  21  3  274 DUNGEON CELL (1470)
PARRY-STRIKE     MATH OP OWAIN 35-1418      80 133  1  216 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)
LUNGING ATTACK   TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419    66 147  3  202 CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)
WALL OF STEEL    RUBBER BULLET 54-2503      28   7  1  198 USELESS TOOLS (735)
TOTAL PARRY      SPARE ANCHOR 18-9610       59  31  1  193 SEA DOGS (426)

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
STRIKING ATTACK  DON KING 47-5374           30  29  3  184 ROYAL FLUSH (146)
BASHING ATTACK   SUGARBEET 7-5219           37  38  1  182 SUGAR AND SPICE (1231)
PARRY-LUNGE      BLACKMAIL 64-3917          38  54  0  129 UNDER DURESS (741)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    MONTY PYTHON 22-5939       22  10  0   74 SERPENTINE INC. (802)

The overall popularity leader is TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419.  The most popular warrior 
this turn was SURLY DECKHAND 21-6568.  The ten other most popular fighters were 
SUGARBEET 7-5219, DOMINION 98-2058, TAVIS CADFALSON 35-1419, WARHEAD 82-13913, JACK 
KNIFE 47-6694, CHATTY CABALIST 42-4488, PRISONER 0484 82--15865, HAMMERHEAD 35-4129, 
SMOKE 68-5868, and HALIBUTT 5-4866.

The least popular fighter this week was PUMPING ON STEELE 82--32315.  The other ten 
least popular fighters were HUW AP HUW 35-3030, ASSUR 18-7821, HOFFA 18-9369, 
BLACKMAIL 64-3917, MONTY PYTHON 22-5939, SAN YANDO 30-576, GOSSAMER 98-407, THOME 
22-6848, DON KING 47-5374, and MONKEY DO 25-4152.

Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  
KALTOS(5)            1  1 0  IAYE(30)             0  1 0  ILLIS(59)            1  0 0  
BONSUR(7)            2  1 0  MURSKA(35)           2  3 0  KURUKAR(64)          0  2 0  
TALCAMA(18)          1  3 0  RODEKI(42)           1  0 0  FIREHOLD(68)         0  1 0  
SUNSET(21)           0  1 0  NORTH FORK(47)       4  0 0  DWES EG(82)          3  1 0  
SOLVEN(22)           1  1 0  TROCAR(54)           1  2 0  SYVYN'S HILL(98)     1  1 0  
LYRATILAN(25)        1  0 0  

TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 TIFFINAL 5-4865             26  23  2  122  WIZARD'S WRATH (1464)      KALTOS
 SUGARBEET 7-5219            37  38  1  182  SUGAR AND SPICE (1231)     BONSUR
 SPARE ANCHOR 18-9610        59  31  1  193  SEA DOGS (426)             TALCAMA
 SURLY DECKHAND 21-6568      47  56  1  117  SEA DOGS (1446)            SUNSET
 THOME 22-6848               21   1  0   97  SERPENTS HOLD (1505)       SOLVEN
 MONKEY DO 25-4152           25  18  2  116  PRIMATES-R-US (1135)       LYRATILAN
 SAN YANDO 30-576            33  34  1  143  YAMA BUSHI (275)           IAYE
 MATH OP OWAIN 35-1418       80 133  1  216  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA
 CHATTY CABALIST 42-4488     52  21  3  274  DUNGEON CELL (1470)        RODEKI
 DON KING 47-5374            30  29  3  184  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
 RUBBER BULLET 54-2503       28   7  1  198  USELESS TOOLS (735)        TROCAR
 IMMOVEABLE OBJECT 59-2110   39  13  1  254  NOT QUITE (1237)           ILLIS
 BLACKMAIL 64-3917           38  54  0  129  UNDER DURESS (741)         KURUKAR
 SMOKE 68-5868               38  30  0  166  ZOMBIE SQUAD II II (1495)  FIREHOLD
 WARHEAD 82-13913            32  11  0  225  PYROMANIA (1508)           DWES EG
 DOMINION 98-2058            18  22  3  127  ZOMBIE SQUAD 3 (1498)      SYVYN'S HILL