AD

Date   : 02/29/2012    Duedate: 03/13/2012

HOME GUARD ARENA

DM 101    TURN 579

RANK TEAMS                 W    L   K    %  RANK TEAMS                 W    L   K    % 
  1 JAZZMATAZZ 17/602    201  110   2 64.6      MEAT YOUR MAKER 72/1439
    LOOK OUT!! 24/1514                          NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC 42/1517
    BLUNT FORCE 29/1512                       4 NO RESPECT  82/1399  378  348   4 52.1
    ARCHERS OF LOAF 63/835                      SUGAR AND SPICE 7/1231
    ARCANE GREATS FTF 96/1519                   PERFECTION QUEST 98/1204
  2 SEA DOGS 21/1446     655  428   5 60.5    5 ZOMBIE SQUA 98/1498   92   94   0 49.5
    SEA DOGS 33/1501                            ZOMBIE SQUAD II II 68/1495
    SEA DOGS 35/1502                          6 ATTACKO/TCL 82/1520   59   82   1 41.8
    DUNGEON CELL 97 82/1497                   7 ARROGANCE 18/755     497  744  11 40.0
    SHEWISH BANQUET 98/1515                     UNDER DURESS 64/741
  3 SPARF! 20/1069      1144  978  16 53.9    8 CHILDREN OF 35/1415  755 1262   8 37.4
    NOT QUITE 59/1237                         9 BLOOD FROG  99/1511    1    7   0 12.5
    ROYAL FLUSH 47/146                          BLOOD FROGS 2 98/1510
    USELESS TOOLS 54/735                     10 OPEN HAND 29/1518      0    3   0  0.0
    DUCKS UNLIMITED 39/1221

                                  WARRIOR SPOTLIGHT

                     ANNOUNCING TURF WAR VIII; DM47; JULY 2012

     Don't miss the premier event in all Alastari!  Gather an alliance.  (2 to 4
managers).  Select a captain.  Send in your entry fee(certs).  Prepare your warriors.
The competition, the acclaim, and the prizes await.
     The Turf War is expected to bring ten or more teams to battle.  The competition
is fierce.  Only one Alliance can win TW8.  Will it be yours?

                                 *TURF WAR 8 RULES*

                          Starting July 30 2012 (12 turns)
              Bring acclaim and glory to the North Fork (DM47) arena.

Anyone may participate; known alliances, new alliances, or temporary alliances
created solely to compete in the Turf War!  To participate, each alliance must:
        1.  Announce the Captain of the alliance in the North Fork (DM 47)
            newsletter.
        2.  Indicate in the newsletter which Captain/alliance you will join.
        3.  Announcements made on the D2 Forums or elsewhere will not be accepted.

Captains are responsible for:
        1.  Verifying/authorizing, in the North Fork newsletter, those who wish to
participate under the banner of their alliance.  (Lack of participant indication of
joining and/or lack of lack of Captain confirmation will delay a team's participation
in the Turf War.)
        2.  Distribution of prizes should their alliance win the Turf War.
        3.  Submit two (2) RSI Roll-Up Certificates to participate.  (Note: Captains
may, if they wish, submit certs for all potential members of their alliance.)

Participating managers who are not Captains must:
        1.  Submit two (2) RSI Roll-Up Certificates to participate.  (Unless already
submitted by Captain. Note: extras will not be returned, but will go into the winning
pool of prizes.)
        2.  Announce their intent to compete with manager name, team name, and
alliance they will represent in the North Fork (DM 47) newsletter.  Announcement made
on the D2 Forums will not be accepted.
               a.  No scores will be tabulated until an RSI Gift Certificate is
received, and participant indication and captain confirmation are posted in the North
Fork newsletter.  NO EXCEPTIONS.
               b.  Before a manager can compete, he/she must declare themselves in
the North Fork (DM 47) newsletter as stated above AND be verified in the newsletter
by the alliance Captain they will represent.
               c.  Only one (1) team per player may compete.  No arena multiple teams
or aliases will be allowed.  Violations will result in immediate manager
disqualification (including team point adjustments) from the Turf War (so be sure to
take any multiple teams OFF of Team Maintenance and be certain not to run any other
team warriors).
               d.  Scoring will NOT be retroactive for teams/alliances that do not
properly declare or get captain confirmation or fail to send a Gift Certificate by
Turn 1.  In other words, if your Gift Certificate is not received until Turn 3 of the
Turf War, and you have fought on Turns 1 and 2, your score will not begin until Turn
3.  All conditions must be met before scoring will begin--declaration, verification,
and Gift Certificate received.
               e.  No declarations or verifications will be accepted after Turn 3 of
the Turf War.
               f.  For purposes of scoring, the moderators will score the Turf War
and settle any and all disputes as they arise.  Their decisions will be final.
(Note: the intent is to have a very thorough set of rules so that few decisions, if
any, are required from the moderators.)

Scoring will be as follows for Fights:
                                   Win   Loss   Kill      Die
Challenge (up or within same class) +2     -2     +5       -5
Down Challenge "Challenger"         -2     -2     -5       -5
Down Challenge "Challenged"         +2      0     +5       -5
Match Up                            +1     -1     +1       -5
Bloodfeud Challenge (Up or Down)    +2     -5     +5      -10
Champion **                         x2     x2     x2       x2
Dark Arena*                        +10     -5     xx       xx
Tournament Death***                                        -3
Halfway (6 round total) best alliance win/loss percentage ****
Final (12 round total) alliance w/l% percentage ****
    *After 2nd win in DA, warrior scores no additional points for wins,
    ** Champions double applies to his score only -- not to opponent.
    *** No warrior may be substituted without the proper use of the DA or arena death
or death in a tournament or graduation.  There must be a maximum of five only on a
team at any point and time.  (The penalty for such substitution is -10 points.)
Points awarded for team tournament participation are 1 for 1 entrant, 3 for 2
entrants, 6 for 3 entrants, 10 for 4 entrants, and 15 for 5 entrants.  A TV scores 7
points or a TC scores 15 points.  Death in a tournament results in a -3 score.
    ***** Halfway points scored are 25, 20, 15, 10, 5, 5, 5 (etc) for 1st, 2nd, 3rd
(etc).  (To qualify for any of these points the alliance must have fought 75% of its
possible fights.)  Final 12 Round points scored are 40, 30, 20, 15, 10, 5, 5, 5 (etc)
for the 1st, 2nd, 3rd (etc).  (To qualify for any of these points the alliance must
have fought 75% of its possible fights.)

Special Scoring Considerations for the Turf War are as follows:
Full Team:                                        +1
      1. A team which fights 4+ warriors (Includes DAing) gets a point
Full Alliance                                     +1
2. An alliance were ALL teams get a Full Team point earns a point
Full Team/Alliance scores 
      3. Will double for the last half (6 rounds) of TW8.
Style Master:                                     +2
      1. No matter how many stylemasters, an individual team can score only +2 per
         round 
Duelmaster:                                       +2
      1. Duelmaster points shall be earned separate of stylemaster points.

Champions:
     1.  A Champion may be declared, but one is not mandatory.
     2.  Only one Champion allowed per manager at any given time.
     3.  Champions that graduate or are killed by another warrior in the arena, but
         not the Dark Arena, may be replaced.
     4.  Champions must have fought at least one previous fight in the North Fork
         (DM47 arena) to be able to be declared a champion.
     5.  A Champion can be declared on any round and point factors will begin that
         same turn. (Must meet above 4 conditions prior to declaring)

Bloodfeuds:
        1.  Bloodfeuds will score points on all four (4) turns.
        2.  There is no limit to which warrior may bloodfeud or how often.
        3.  To score as a bloodfeud, then feud/death must have occurred totally
within the TW8.  (E.g. Feuds created prior to TW8 will not be deemed or scored as a
bloodfeud, but rather as a challenge or downchallenge.

Downchallenges:
        1.  A downchallenge occurs when a warrior challenges a warrior in a lower
class.  (Lower class is defined as lower than the identical class.  (E.g. A
challenger champion class challenging a champion class is a down challenge.)
        2.  In TW8 a standard challenge is up (in recognition points), parallel or
within the identical class but lower recognition.
        3.  No challenge by The Duelmaster shall be deemed a downchallenge.  (This
rule supersedes all other downchallenge rules.)

Tournament Considerations:
        1.  Tournament participation is allowed and ENCOURAGED as a great form of
recognition for North Fork.
        2.  Tournament Victors won during the course of the contest will gain a one
(1) time bonus of 7 points.  This bonus will apply EACH time a warrior(s) wins such
status.
        3.  Tournament Champions won during the course of the contest will gain a one
(1) time bonus of 15 points.  This bonus will apply EACH time a warrior(s) win such
status.
        4.  Points awarded for tournament participation are 1 for 1 entrant, 3 for 2
entrants, 6 for 3 entrants, 10 for 4 entrants, and 15 for 5 entrants.  A TV scores 7
points additional or a TC scores 15 points additional.  Death in a tournament results
in an additional -3 score.
        5.  Points for entrants, TVs, TCs, and tournament deaths will be applied the
Turn after RSI posts tournament results in the North Fork (DM 47) newsletter (i.e.,
if the results post on North Fork turn 300, points will be credited on North Fork
turn 301 to the applicable teams).

Special Considerations:
        1.  Each alliance begins the Turf War with zero (0) points.
        2.  There will be NO alliance or team changes once the contest has begun.  If
you begin the Turf War with Alliance A, you must end the Turf War with Alliance A.
If you begin the Turf War with Team A, you must end the Turf War with Team A.
        3.  There will be a maximum of four (4) teams/managers allowed per alliance
for the Turf War VII.  The minimum is two (2).
        4.  The Dark Arena may be used on the first FE turn (e.g. no arena or
tournament fights) only, of every warrior, without penalty.
        5.  If at any time, the Moderators determine that any non-TW team in the
arena is aiding and/or abetting any TW alliance or team, the affected points won by
the gifted team/alliance will be disallowed and the aiding non-TW team will be asked
to desist from play in the arena until after the Turf War concludes.

Prizes:
The Turf War is meant to be a "winner takes all" contest.  However, for TW8, a prize
(RU cert) will be awarded each of the twelve turns to the individual team/manager
that fights five fights and has the best w/l record that turn.  (Tiebreakers are in
this order-- kills, recognition points earned.)  All prizes and 100% of the Gift
Certificates will be awarded to the Captain of the winning alliance at the end of the
competition.  It is the responsibility of the Captain to distribute Gift
Certificates.  Moderators will submit a list of each manager on the winning alliance
to RSI at the completion of the contest for the non-Certificate prizes.

     All entry fees (rollup certs) are awarded to the winning alliance, except for
the twelve reserved for the individual winning manager each week.)
     The following prizes have been secured from RSI:
        1.  Renaming of the North Fork (DM 47) arena;
        2.  Renaming of all Dark Arena Monsters (two for each manager in the winning
alliance, and two additional for the captain of the alliance).
        3.  Known Favorites for one DM47 warrior on each team of the winning alliance
(warrior must be ranked Initiate or above, must be alive, and must have at least one
DM47 arena fight to receive this award).
        4.  +1 Skill bonus (three) for each manager on the winning alliance.  Bonus
potions must be applied to living warriors from DM 47.
        5.  +1 Skill bonus potion (one) for each and every individual manager who
fights in all 12 rounds AND 54 fights of the Turf War.  Bonus potion must be applied
to a living warrior from (DM 47)
        6. Two additional rollup certs for each manager of the winning alliance from
RSI.
     These RSI awards will be listed by the Moderator for claiming from RSI (Lee)
within 4 turns of the end of TW VI.  The certs will be mailed to the winning alliance
by the Moderators within two weeks of the end of the TW.

Moderators:
The Moderators for this event will be Oz and Master Darque.  They will arbitrate all
dealings during the course of the contest.  Their decisions will be final.  All
questions, comments, and scoring disputes may be directed to Land of Oz or Darque
Forces via diplo in DM 47.  Managers with internet access may send a private message
to [The Consortium] or [Darque] on the Duel2 Forums.  Lastly, you may also email
questions, comments, and scoring disputes to rebelnerfherder at yahoo dot com or
wfms101 at aol dot com.

Please note there have been rule changes from the last Turf War.  Please read them
carefully!

This contest will begin in late July 2012 following the Summer FTF.
                             **TW8 Revision 02-20-12**

                                 THE GUARDIAN'S FORUM
                       Reflections by the Captain of the Guard

     I'm being forced back into general population after the tournament.  This
minimum security bit was nice while it lasted.  Wish me luck in Talahya.

Snake Oil Salesman

                             REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER

     The Name Change has moved among us, and we now have prisoners with real names!
Good work.  Not to mention that Spring is creeping up on us.  Not like a lamb, or a
lion, either, more like a cat sneaking up on an inattentive mouse.
     Here in Home Guard, we have Hammerhead gaining twenty-four points, Ground Zero
losing sixteen.  Mere trifles.  I've seen bigger gains and losses before and
doubtless will again.
     Zontani reports that "if exactly 6 die in duels this week, the whole city shall
perish!"  This looks to me like a silly prediction, not that I wouldn't mind the city
perishing.  But is that "exactly 6" HERE, or elsewhere, or over some large area, or
what?  I think we can safely ignore this, although, if you have doubts, I would
recommend a vacation in... Tahiti or somewhere.  *I* can't go, Tahiti is no place for
a dead man.  But you could.
     Sea Dogs is official the team to avoid fighting today (NOT "the team to beat,"
or they'd get the most challenges).  Useless Tools avoided fighting them.
Hydroponicus got the most challenges.
     We had nineteen fights, with three standbys and NINE challenges.  This is good.
Two fights were action-packed and two were exciting.  Others were crowd-pleasing,
popular, brutal, and bloody.  Not to mention uneven and mismatched.  And some were
surprisingly long.

     GROUND ZERO (63-2044) (25-11-2,90) of ARCHERS OF LOAF fought HAMMERHEAD (35-
4129) (29-30-2,68) of SEA DOGS.  GROUND ZERO was defeated by HAMMERHEAD in an
exciting 1 minute bout.  The fight leading to the largest point movements.
     PERCY QUIN 24 (82-29478) (17-38-0,89) of ATTACKO/TCLONES05 fought DILL WEED (7-
5241) (16-11-0,69) of SUGAR AND SPICE.  PERCY QUIN 24 was bested by DILL WEED in a
crowd pleasing 2 minute brawl.  This left Percy in a pickle.  Many people just can't
handle dill.
     RABID TOAD (98-2767) (9-2-4,58) of BLOOD FROGS 2 fought ACE OF BASE (47-6905)
(18-13-0,73) of ROYAL FLUSH.  RABID TOAD was vanquished by ACE OF BASE in a 1 minute
one-sided fray.  We probably owe Ace a vote of thanks (votes are free) for saving us
from this rabid killer amphibian.  Or is a toad a reptile?
     ASSUR (18-7821) (33-86-2,132) of ARROGANCE fought PUMPING ON STEELE (82-33221)
(22-30-0,143) of NO RESPECT II.  ASSUR was defeated by PUMPING ON STEELE in a 3
minute struggle.  Somehow, this seems appropriate.  Don't ask me how, it's vague.
     SURLY DECKHAND (21-6568) (53-61-1,166) of SEA DOGS fought MANIPULATOR (64-3490)
(44-77-6,106) of UNDER DURESS.  SURLY DECKHAND overcame MANIPULATOR in an action
packed 2 minute fight.  No surprise here.

     DOMINION (98-2058) (23-28-3,153) of ZOMBIE SQUAD 3 fought HOCKEY DUCK (39-937)
(36-30-1,115) of DUCKS UNLIMITED.  DOMINION slimly won victory over HOCKEY DUCK in a
15 minute bloody bout.  As you can see, this Duck was hard to beat.  Next time, who
knows, he may not be beaten at all.
     IMMOVEABLE OBJECT (59-2110) (44-16-1,195) of NOT QUITE fought RIPPY BRICKBOY
(101-1) (0-0-0,200) of Various Odds and Bods.  IMMOVEABLE OBJECT outwaited RIPPY
BRICKBOY in a 25 minute brutal battle.  And the most brutal aspect of it was...
TWENTY-FIVE MINUTES?  I don't know about you guys, but I don't like to sit still that
long.
     RUBBER BULLET (54-2503) (31-12-1,192) of USELESS TOOLS fought BATTLING BOB (101-
26) (0-0-0,200) of Various Odds and Bods.  RUBBER BULLET was demolished by BATTLING
BOB in a 1 minute mismatched competition.  I didn't know you could bounce a bullet
like a ball.
     PHONELESS CORD (54-2018) (41-29-0,195) of USELESS TOOLS fought SHARON SHEW (101-
25) (0-0-0,181) of Various Odds and Bods.  PHONELESS CORD overpowered SHARON SHEW in
a popular 1 minute brutal one-sided melee.  This makes Crip 2-1 against the standbys.

The challenges:
     HYDROPONICUS (29-4605) (20-6-0,84) of BLUNT FORCE challenged GOSSAMER (98-407)
(12-13-4,70) of PERFECTION QUEST.  Down 14.  HYDROPONICUS defeated GOSSAMER in an
action packed 1 minute Challenge duel.  And yet, Hydroponicus was reported as most
challenged!  There are times wonder about the Commission's statisticians.  Were they
up late getting sozzled last night?  Did the dog eat their homework?
     DARIUS (29-5467) (16-10-1,44) of OPEN HAND challenged BAKED CONVINCIA (98-2341)
(13-12-4,55) of SHEWISH BANQUET.  Up 11.  DARIUS was viciously subdued by BAKED
CONVINCIA in a 3 minute Challenge duel.  A good try, Darius, but these Bloodgame
survivors are TOUGH.
     PASTRAMI ELEMENTAL (96-3748) (11-1-3,63) of ARCANE GREATS FTF challenged HOFFA
(18-9369) (25-58-0,64) of ARROGANCE.  Up 1.  PASTRAMI ELEMENTAL viciously subdued
HOFFA in a 5 minute Challenge competition.  Ah, our Hoffa.  One of our Hoffas.  We've
got two.  Darkholm--there was just talk about it--has three.  And I know there are
others scattered around the Isle.  As to this fight, I would have expected Hoffa to
handle pastrami just fine.
     NUCLEAR HARMONY (17-4599) (18-10-3,43) of JAZZMATAZZ challenged HOFFA (18-8478)
(19-89-1,46) of ARROGANCE.  Up 3.  NUCLEAR HARMONY viciously subdued HOFFA in a crowd
pleasing 2 minute Challenge fight.  Don't these Hoffas have great records?
     DORSAL FINN (42-1662) (4-4-1,33) of NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC challenged AMPUTATOR
FROG (99-3206) (9-5-4,35) of BLOOD FROG 3.  Up 2.  DORSAL FINN demolished AMPUTATOR
FROG in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge competition.  And under the threat of
expulsion, Dorsal Finn wins his first fight in Home Guard.  Looking at his record, I
suspect tourney fights.  Still, good luck to him in Crysalis.

     POOP SLINGER (24-4478) (18-4-0,96) of LOOK OUT!! challenged OWAIN HARLSON (35-
3130) (61-103-1,109) of CHILDREN OF LLYR.  Up 13.  POOP SLINGER was devastated by
OWAIN HARLSON in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge fight.  Frankly, this is a surprise.
What the heck is Owain doing, winning a fight?
     PORKY PIG (72-5953) (25-14-2,128) of MEAT YOUR MAKER challenged SHARK BAIT (33-
7652) (27-20-0,130) of SEA DOGS.  Up 2.  PORKY PIG overpowered SHARK BAIT in a 1
minute mismatched Challenge duel.  Well, you know Porky.  He'll eat anything,
including your bait.
     JACK KNIFE (47-6694) (24-13-1,138) of ROYAL FLUSH challenged HUW AP HUW (35-
3030) (47-124-1,142) of CHILDREN OF LLYR.  Up 4.  JACK KNIFE narrowly defeated HUW AP 
HUW in an exciting 3 minute Challenge melee.  Now, THIS is proper behavior for a
Child of Llyr.
     ROWDY YOBBO (20-3429) (39-42-1,181) of SPARF! challenged SMOKE (68-5868) (41-38-
0,182) of ZOMBIE SQUAD II II.  Up 1.  ROWDY YOBBO slimly lost to SMOKE in a crowd
pleasing 7 minute Challenge fight.  After seven minutes of stepping to the right or
the left and studying the situation, I'll say things were slim.  The crowd used this
time to do a seven-minute stretch in preparation for the title match.

And FOR the title:  SNAKE OIL SALESMAN (82-49671) (46-54-1,310) of DUNGEON CELL 97
fought DON KING (47-5374) (35-32-3,191) of ROYAL FLUSH.  SNAKE OIL SALESMAN defeated
DON KING in a 2 minute Title fight.  We congratulate Snake Oil Salesman both on the
win and on having a real name now.  Surprisingly, he got a real face to go with the
name, which is certainly better than being a "man in an iron mask" type of dude.  And
we congratulate Don King for lasting into the second minute.

                                        Olaf

CAPTAIN OF THE GUARD           W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 SNAKE OIL SALESMAN 82-49671  47  54  1  316  DUNGEON CELL 97 (1497)     DWES EG

GRAND CHAMPIONS                W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 PHONELESS CORD 54-2018       42  29     202  USELESS TOOLS (735)        TROCAR
 IMMOVEABLE OBJECT 59-2110    45  16  1  200  NOT QUITE (1237)           ILLIS
 SMOKE 68-5868                42  38     190  ZOMBIE SQUAD II II (1495)  FIREHOLD
 DON KING 47-5374             35  33  3  189  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
 RUBBER BULLET 54-2503        31  13  1  184  USELESS TOOLS (735)        TROCAR

GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS        W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 ROWDY YOBBO 20-3429          39  43  1  180  SPARF! (1069)              SEAM
 SURLY DECKHAND 21-6568       54  61  1  168  SEA DOGS (1446)            SUNSET
 DOMINION 98-2058             24  28  3  155  ZOMBIE SQUAD 3 (1498)      SYVYN'S HILL

GRAND ADEPTS                   W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 JACK KNIFE 47-6694           25  13  1  148  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
 PUMPING ON STEELE 82-33221   23  30     146  NO RESPECT II (1399)       DWES EG
 PORKY PIG 72-5953            26  14  2  144  MEAT YOUR MAKER (1439)     DRAGONHEAD
 HUW AP HUW 35-3030           47 125  1  141  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA
 ASSUR 18-7821                33  87  2  131  ARROGANCE (755)            TALCAMA
 OWAIN HARLSON 35-3130        62 103  1  123  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA
 SHARK BAIT 33-7652           27  21     122  SEA DOGS (1501)            NIATOLI ISLAND

GRAND ADEPTS                   W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 HOCKEY DUCK 39-937           36  31  1  121  DUCKS UNLIMITED (1221)     XOCHITHLAN
 MANIPULATOR 64-3490          44  78  6  117  UNDER DURESS (741)         KURUKAR

GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
-A.O. HELL 54-2523            32  14  2   94  USELESS TOOLS (735)        TROCAR
 HAMMERHEAD 35-4129           30  30  2   92  SEA DOGS (1502)            MURSKA

GRAND INITIATES                W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 POOP SLINGER 24-4478         18   5      89  LOOK OUT!! (1514)          ZORPUNT
 DILL WEED 7-5241             17  11      87  SUGAR AND SPICE (1231)     BONSUR
 HYDROPONICUS 29-4605         21   6      86  BLUNT FORCE (1512)         LAPUR
 ACE OF BASE 47-6905          19  13      84  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
 PERCY QUIN 24 82-29478       17  39      77  ATTACKO/TCLONES05 (1520)   DWES EG
 GROUND ZERO 63-2044          25  12  2   74  ARCHERS OF LOAF (835)      AMEN-TEI
 GOSSAMER 98-407              12  14  4   73  PERFECTION QUEST (1204)    SYVYN'S HILL
 PASTRAMI ELEMENTAL 96-3748   12   1  3   72  ARCANE GREATS FTF (1519)   OLD VALAMANTIS
 HOFFA 18-9369                25  59      61  ARROGANCE (755)            TALCAMA
 BAKED CONVINCIA 98-2341      14  12  4   61  SHEWISH BANQUET (1515)     SYVYN'S HILL
-FAIRYFIRE 59-2660            19   2  1   60  IMPROVED ILLUSION (1431)   ILLIS
 RABID TOAD 98-2767            9   3  4   54  BLOOD FROGS 2 (1510)       SYVYN'S HILL
 NUCLEAR HARMONY 17-4599      19  10  3   53  JAZZMATAZZ (602)           ALJAFIR
-HARVEY 59-2636               16   1      49  IMPROVED ILLUSION (1431)   ILLIS
 DARIUS 29-5467               16  11  1   46  OPEN HAND (1518)           LAPUR
 DORSAL FINN 42-1662           5   4  1   46  NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC (1517) RODEKI
 HOFFA 18-8478                19  90  1   41  ARROGANCE (755)            TALCAMA
 AMPUTATOR FROG 99-3206        9   6  4   24  BLOOD FROG 3 (1511)        SOUTH RIDGE

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                   W   L  K TEAM NAME              SLAIN BY                  TURN

                               PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE

Gossamer -- Flowers!  And in the middle of the fight!  I thought the fight was over!
Next thing you know I got a pair of elbows coming at me.  How about a deep tissue
massage with those elbows? -- Darius

Smoke -- On first read, didn't realize that that you tried to smoke me early on in
the fight.  But I have to say I like your approach -- Rubber Bullet

Poop Slinger -- And you handily take the legit rematch challenge too.  Well done. --
Ace of Base
P.S.  The boss just wanted to say he just noticed you in some old Dead Apprentice
Tourney fights.

Snake Oil Salesman -- Your name change must have kept your from being recognized as
the AB stylemaster. -- Phoneless Cord

Shark Bait -- Oh no!  Another stinkin' OAB Aim Blow. -- Rowdy Yobbo

To those who care -- Most of Crip's Crap have been deemed crappy enough to stay
around here for another cycle.  Only A.O. Hell and Dorsal Finn (who has yet to win
here) are being given the boot back to Crysalis. -- Crip

Dill Weed has no place at a Shewish Banquet. -- Baked Convincia

If you can believe the Split sheet, neither Owain nor I will be forced out THIS time.
So you're stuck with us a little longer. -- Huw ap Huw

Darius -- And a rousing welcome to you.  For many gladiators, things DO get better
than that initial loss to a standby.  Not for us, but for many. -- Huw and Owain,
Children of Llyr

Porky Pig -- Greasy doesn't begin to cover it!  The way you slid past me and grabbed
that win was darned oily. -- Owain Harlson

Olaf -- I do have more endurance, but I was saving it for after-hours activity. --
Huw

Dominion -- Good thing we both brought sandwiches to that encounter. -- Huw ap Huw

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

ROWDY YOBBO slimly lost to SMOKE in a crowd pleasing 7 minute Challenge fight.
JACK KNIFE narrowly defeated HUW AP HUW in a exciting 3 minute Challenge melee.
PORKY PIG overpowered SHARK BAIT in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge duel.
POOP SLINGER was devastated by OWAIN HARLSON in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge fight.
DORSAL FINN demolished AMPUTATOR FROG in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge competition.
NUCLEAR HARMONY viciously subdued HOFFA in a crowd pleasing 2 minute Challenge fight.
PASTRAMI ELEMENTAL viciously subdued HOFFA in a 5 minute Challenge competition.
DARIUS was viciously subdued by BAKED CONVINCIA in a 3 minute Challenge duel.
HYDROPONICUS defeated GOSSAMER in a action packed 1 minute Challenge duel.
SNAKE OIL SALESMAN defeated DON KING in a 2 minute Title fight.
PHONELESS CORD overpowered SHARON SHEW in a popular 1 minute brutal one-sided melee.
RUBBER BULLET was demolished by BATTLING BOB in a 1 minute mismatched competition.
IMMOVEABLE OBJECT outwaited RIPPY BRICKBOY in a 25 minute brutal battle.
DOMINION slimly won victory over HOCKEY DUCK in a 15 minute bloody bout.
SURLY DECKHAND overcame MANIPULATOR in a action packed 2 minute fight.
ASSUR was defeated by PUMPING ON STEELE in a 3 minute struggle.
RABID TOAD was vanquished by ACE OF BASE in a 1 minute one-sided fray.
PERCY QUIN 24 was bested by DILL WEED in a crowd pleasing 2 minute brawl.
GROUND ZERO was defeated by HAMMERHEAD in a exciting 1 minute bout.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|AIMED BLOW                       9         PARRY-RIPOSTE      7 -   1 -  1      88  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   6         SLASHING ATTACK   13 -   6 -  0      68  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    5         PARRY-LUNGE        8 -   5 -  0      62  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     3         LUNGING ATTACK    13 -  10 -  0      57  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  3         AIMED BLOW        31 -  25 -  0      55  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      3         WALL OF STEEL     15 -  17 -  0      47  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  2         BASHING ATTACK    20 -  25 -  1      44  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   2         PARRY-STRIKE      10 -  13 -  0      43  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      1         STRIKING ATTACK    9 -  12 -  0      43  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    1         TOTAL PARRY        6 -  24 -  0      20  |

Turn 579 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-LUNGE        1 -  0     PARRY-STRIKE       1 -  2         3  WALL OF STEEL  
WALL OF STEEL      4 -  1     STRIKING ATTACK    1 -  2         2  AIMED BLOW     
BASHING ATTACK     4 -  2     TOTAL PARRY        1 -  2         2  BASHING ATTACK 
AIMED BLOW         5 -  4     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  1         1  TOTAL PARRY    
SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  1     LUNGING ATTACK     0 -  2         1  STRIKING ATTACK
                                                                1  LUNGING ATTACK 
                                                                1  PARRY-STRIKE   

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
AIMED BLOW       PHONELESS CORD 54-2018     42  29  0  202 USELESS TOOLS (735)

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
TOTAL PARRY      SMOKE 68-5868              42  38  0  190 ZOMBIE SQUAD II II (1495)
STRIKING ATTACK  DON KING 47-5374           35  33  3  189 ROYAL FLUSH (146)
WALL OF STEEL    RUBBER BULLET 54-2503      31  13  1  184 USELESS TOOLS (735)
LUNGING ATTACK   ROWDY YOBBO 20-3429        39  43  1  180 SPARF! (1069)
BASHING ATTACK   SURLY DECKHAND 21-6568     54  61  1  168 SEA DOGS (1446)
PARRY-STRIKE     DOMINION 98-2058           24  28  3  155 ZOMBIE SQUAD 3 (1498)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    HOCKEY DUCK 39-937         36  31  1  121 DUCKS UNLIMITED (1221)
SLASHING ATTACK  POOP SLINGER 24-4478       18   5  0   89 LOOK OUT!! (1514)
PARRY-LUNGE      DILL WEED 7-5241           17  11  0   87 SUGAR AND SPICE (1231)

The overall popularity leader is HUW AP HUW 35-3030.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was ROWDY YOBBO 20-3429.  The ten other most popular fighters were PASTRAMI 
ELEMENTAL 96-3748, HUW AP HUW 35-3030, JACK KNIFE 47-6694, NUCLEAR HARMONY 17-4599, 
DARIUS 29-5467, DILL WEED 7-5241, SMOKE 68-5868, BAKED CONVINCIA 98-2341, SNAKE OIL 
SALESMAN 82--15865, and HOCKEY DUCK 39-937.

The least popular fighter this week was IMMOVEABLE OBJECT 59-2110.  The other ten 
least popular fighters were RABID TOAD 98-2767, RUBBER BULLET 54-2503, AMPUTATOR FROG 
99-3206, POOP SLINGER 24-4478, SHARK BAIT 33-7652, GROUND ZERO 63-2044, DOMINION 
98-2058, HOFFA 18-9369, GOSSAMER 98-407, and HOFFA 18-8478.

Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  
BONSUR(7)            1  0 0  MURSKA(35)           2  1 0  KURUKAR(64)          0  1 0  
ALJAFIR(17)          1  0 0  XOCHITHLAN(39)       0  1 0  FIREHOLD(68)         1  0 0  
TALCAMA(18)          0  3 0  RODEKI(42)           1  0 0  DRAGONHEAD(72)       1  0 0  
SEAM(20)             0  1 0  NORTH FORK(47)       2  1 0  DWES EG(82)          2  1 0  
SUNSET(21)           1  0 0  TROCAR(54)           1  1 0  OLD VALAMANTIS(96)   1  0 0  
ZORPUNT(24)          0  1 0  ILLIS(59)            1  0 0  SYVYN'S HILL(98)     2  2 0  
LAPUR(29)            1  1 0  AMEN-TEI(63)         0  1 0  SOUTH RIDGE(99)      0  1 0  
NIATOLI ISLAND(33)   0  1 0  

TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 DILL WEED 7-5241            17  11  0   87  SUGAR AND SPICE (1231)     BONSUR
 NUCLEAR HARMONY 17-4599     19  10  3   53  JAZZMATAZZ (602)           ALJAFIR
 ASSUR 18-7821               33  87  2  131  ARROGANCE (755)            TALCAMA
 ROWDY YOBBO 20-3429         39  43  1  180  SPARF! (1069)              SEAM
 SURLY DECKHAND 21-6568      54  61  1  168  SEA DOGS (1446)            SUNSET
 POOP SLINGER 24-4478        18   5  0   89  LOOK OUT!! (1514)          ZORPUNT
 HYDROPONICUS 29-4605        21   6  0   86  BLUNT FORCE (1512)         LAPUR
 SHARK BAIT 33-7652          27  21  0  122  SEA DOGS (1501)            NIATOLI ISLAND
 HUW AP HUW 35-3030          47 125  1  141  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA
 HOCKEY DUCK 39-937          36  31  1  121  DUCKS UNLIMITED (1221)     XOCHITHLAN
 DORSAL FINN 42-1662          5   4  1   46  NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC (1517) RODEKI
 DON KING 47-5374            35  33  3  189  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
 PHONELESS CORD 54-2018      42  29  0  202  USELESS TOOLS (735)        TROCAR
 IMMOVEABLE OBJECT 59-2110   45  16  1  200  NOT QUITE (1237)           ILLIS
 GROUND ZERO 63-2044         25  12  2   74  ARCHERS OF LOAF (835)      AMEN-TEI
 MANIPULATOR 64-3490         44  78  6  117  UNDER DURESS (741)         KURUKAR
 SMOKE 68-5868               42  38  0  190  ZOMBIE SQUAD II II (1495)  FIREHOLD
 PORKY PIG 72-5953           26  14  2  144  MEAT YOUR MAKER (1439)     DRAGONHEAD
 SNAKE OIL SALESM 82--15865  47  54  1  316  DUNGEON CELL 97 (1497)     DWES EG
 PASTRAMI ELEMENTAL 96-3748  12   1  3   72  ARCANE GREATS FTF (1519)   OLD VALAMANTIS
 DOMINION 98-2058            24  28  3  155  ZOMBIE SQUAD 3 (1498)      SYVYN'S HILL
 AMPUTATOR FROG 99-3206       9   6  4   24  BLOOD FROG 3 (1511)        SOUTH RIDGE