AD

Date   : 09/12/2012    Duedate: 09/25/2012

HOME GUARD ARENA

DM 101    TURN 593

RANK TEAMS                 W    L   K    %  RANK TEAMS                 W    L   K    % 
  1 BLOOD GANG 99/1532     2    1   0 66.7    6 GLADIATOR 99/1533     81   75   1 51.9
  2 TEAM FLOYD 38/690    237  140   2 62.9      PHONOPHONIC 98/1531
    LOOK OUT!! 24/1514                          PANSY DIVISION 51/1149
    BLUNT FORCE 29/1512                       7 WRATHMEN 20/799       50   49   2 50.5
    ARCANE GREATS FTF 96/1519                   WRATHMEN 24/805
  3-CREAM OF THE  2/589   75   49   0 60.5      WRATHMEN 27/807
  4 SEA DOGS 21/1446     700  469   5 59.9      WRATHMEN 30/727
    SEA DOGS 33/1501                            WRATHMEN 36/923
    SEA DOGS 35/1502                            WRATHMEN 41/818
    DUNGEON CELL 42/1470                        WRATHMEN II 71/845
    SHEWISH BUFFET 65/1528                      WRATHMEN VII 71/846
    SHEWISH BUFFET 78/1537                      WRATHMEN DM 20 11/1536
    SHEWISH BANQUET 98/1515                   8 LAME ALLIAN 74/1294   82  100   2 45.1
  5 SPARF! 20/1069      1220 1022  17 54.4      ATTACKO/TCLONES05 82/1520
    NOT QUITE 59/1237                           LORDS OF DARKNESS 15/1318
    ROYAL FLUSH 47/146                          INQUISITION CLONES 38/1525
    PARTY ANIMALS 5/591                       9 ARROGANCE 18/755     512  774  11 39.8
    USELESS TOOLS 54/735                     10 SAND DANCERS 78/775  765 1287   9 37.3
    WORLDWIDE GORE 73/913                       CHILDREN OF LLYR 35/1415
    DUCKS UNLIMITED 39/1221                  11 PUBLIC ENEM 50/1530    4    7   0 36.4
    HERE TO PHOENIX 26/1072                  12 TREKKERS 29/1534      31   58   3 34.8
    MEAT YOUR MAKER 72/1439                  13 BLOOD FROG  99/1511    8   18   0 30.8

                             REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER

     You elder fighters surely remember me.  The younger ones may call me Olaf 
Modeen.  I return to HOME GUARD once again!  What's with SHARK BAIT?  He actually 
beat TEAM FLOYD's SYSTEM OF A DOWN, and walked away with 48 more points from the 
fight.  Laughs were big at SEA DOGS while they watched SHARK BAIT clobber SYSTEM OF A 
DOWN.  He lost 38 points and got bruised from objects thrown from the stands.  
Another fighter (WAHOO 33-20-1) challenged another Duelmaster (POOP SLINGER 31-6-0).  
Life goes on.  WAHOO was reminded on the sands why POOP SLINGER is Duelmaster.  
Wouldn't it be nice to have live subjects to practice on?  I hear some team is 
looking into the uses of convicted prisoners.   
     If at first you don't succeed, avoid.  That'll get you in the Spyreports.  The 
most avoided team was BLUNT FORCE.  In my day, no team with a 17-7-0 would scare me 
off!  What's the problem, ROYAL FLUSH?  What do people see in KOLACTAN KABOB?  His 
28-4-3?  SHEWISH BUFFET ain't talkin', but he's got 197 points.  KOLACTAN KABOB 
didn't quite know what to make of a challenge he received from JACK KNIFE of ROYAL 
FLUSH, who is 18 points below him.  JACK KNIFE perhaps got his just desserts, seeing 
as he beat KOLACTAN KABOB and ended up with 217 recognition points.   
     There have been some calls to lengthen the time limit.  Do you want the fighters 
to walk away, or not?  Here's some advice:  study your opponent, master many skills, 
fight dirty.   
     Well, I'm pretty much through.  You guys need to get back practicing.  Are you 
as tired of reading this as I am of writing it?  Actually, I guess I'm writing it 
before you read it.  Oh, well.  Remember--a good fighter needs both good skills and 
good luck.  Until next time,-- Olaf Modeen  

CAPTAIN OF THE GUARD           W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 POOP SLINGER 24-4478         31   6     237  LOOK OUT!! (1514)          ZORPUNT

GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 JACK KNIFE 47-6694           32  16  1  217  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK

GRAND CHAMPIONS                W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 ROWDY YOBBO 20-3429          48  44  1  209  SPARF! (1069)              SEAM
 EM 15-3737                   38  55  1  209  LORDS OF DARKNESS (1318)   MALCORN
 DON KING 47-5374             42  36  3  206  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
 CATFISH HUNTER 5-3315        30  27  1  204  PARTY ANIMALS (591)        KALTOS
 ASSUR 18-7821                39  95  2  199  ARROGANCE (755)            TALCAMA
 KOLACTAN KABOB 65-7072       28   4  3  197  SHEWISH BUFFET (1528)      DAL SHANG
 WAHOO 26-3916                33  20  1  196  HERE TO PHOENIX (1072)     CALEAM
 IMMOVEABLE OBJECT 59-2110    49  22  2  195  NOT QUITE (1237)           ILLIS
 HUW AP HUW 35-3030           52 134  2  194  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA
 KIANA 24-3878                23  16     194  WRATHMEN (805)             ZORPUNT
-GOPHER BAROQUE 2-3359        67  55     193  CREAM OF THE SLOP (589)    NIANIA
 PHONELESS CORD 54-2018       47  34     191  USELESS TOOLS (735)        TROCAR
 HYDROPONICUS 29-4605         29  12     188  BLUNT FORCE (1512)         LAPUR

GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS        W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 RUBBER BULLET 54-2503        36  18  1  170  USELESS TOOLS (735)        TROCAR
 HOCKEY DUCK 39-937           42  35  1  169  DUCKS UNLIMITED (1221)     XOCHITHLAN
 ACE OF BASE 47-6905          26  16     167  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
-LEE LEE LO LEE 38-4653       31  14  2  165  INQUISITION CLONES (1525)  CLIFFHOME
 LAZY LOOKOUT 42-4504         41  38  1  162  DUNGEON CELL (1470)        RODEKI
 SURLY DECKHAND 21-6568       59  70  1  161  SEA DOGS (1446)            SUNSET
 SHARK BAIT 33-7652           33  29     161  SEA DOGS (1501)            NIATOLI ISLAND
-SCROD BOY 38-4675            27  30  1  156  INQUISITION CLONES (1525)  CLIFFHOME
 PORKY PIG 72-5953            30  20  2  155  MEAT YOUR MAKER (1439)     DRAGONHEAD

GRAND ADEPTS                   W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
-WASTED 20-3085               23  21  3  150  WRATHMEN (799)             SEAM
-HEARTBREAK 36-4612           21   6  3  149  WRATHMEN (923)             JHANS
 BEAULIEU 41-3057             27  19     137  WRATHMEN (818)             KATI-TEI
 BAKED CONVINCIA 98-2341      22  18  4  137  SHEWISH BANQUET (1515)     SYVYN'S HILL
 DOMINIC 30-3545              28  24     134  WRATHMEN (727)             IAYE
-FONZ 74-3332                 20   7  1  134  LAME ALLIANCES (1294)      DAYLA KIV
 SYSTEM OF A DOWN 38-4451     31  16  1  132  TEAM FLOYD (690)           CLIFFHOME
-DOMINIC 27-3085              33  21     119  WRATHMEN (807)             POINT
 SULU 29-5705                 25  14     117  TREKKERS (1534)            LAPUR
 CROSS CZECH 73-4008          19  14  3  109  WORLDWIDE GORE (913)       ERINIKA
 AMPUTATOR FROG 99-3206       16  13  4  107  BLOOD FROG 3 (1511)        SOUTH RIDGE
-PERCY QUIN 24 82-29478       23  42     101  ATTACKO/TCLONES05 (1520)   DWES EG
-FRANCOIS 71-2966             17   8     101  WRATHMEN VII (846)         KYR'TERR

GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 RALTUMAN OMELET 78-2857      16   2  2  100  SHEWISH BUFFET (1537)      LIN TIRIAN

GRAND INITIATES                W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 RED ALERT 50-139             28  18      89  PUBLIC ENEMY (1530)        SNOWBOUND
 RED HOT CHILE PAPA 73-3358   24  16  1   88  WORLDWIDE GORE (913)       ERINIKA
 OWAIN HARLSON 35-3130        67 112  1   85  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA
 HOFFA 18-9369                29  69      83  ARROGANCE (755)            TALCAMA
 WHAT'S A VOLKSIE? 38-4563    21   9      82  TEAM FLOYD (690)           CLIFFHOME
 MONGOL HORDE 73-4001         18   9  4   80  WORLDWIDE GORE (913)       ERINIKA
-BWIN EVOC 71-1965            21  18  1   75  WRATHMEN II (845)          KYR'TERR
 RUPTURE 99-3463              10   3  4   70  BLOOD GANG (1532)          SOUTH RIDGE
 CAPTAIN KIRK 29-5754         16   8  1   69  TREKKERS (1534)            LAPUR
-CAPT. ANTSY PANTS 29-5595    19  10      67  STREET WALKERS (129)       LAPUR
 PRADUS 99-3707                9   5  4   67  GLADIATOR (1533)           SOUTH RIDGE
 HAMMERHEAD 35-4129           37  37  2   64  SEA DOGS (1502)            MURSKA

GRAND INITIATES                W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 PASTRAMI ELEMENTAL 96-3748   15  11  3   64  ARCANE GREATS FTF (1519)   OLD VALAMANTIS
 HOFFA 18-8478                23 100  1   51  ARROGANCE (755)            TALCAMA
 BLACKBERRY 98-3339            8   5  5   48  PHONOPHONIC (1531)         SYVYN'S HILL
 MANNY LEHMAN 51-5074         18  15  1   39  PANSY DIVISION (1149)      TRICORUS
 THRESHPACK 50-138            26  19      34  PUBLIC ENEMY (1530)        SNOWBOUND
 KURTAL DUCK 78-2861          24  34  1   32  SAND DANCERS (775)         LIN TIRIAN

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                   W   L  K TEAM NAME              SLAIN BY                  TURN
BEAULIEU 41-3057          27  19  0 WRATHMEN 818           EM 15-3737                593

                               PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE

Barin Evoc -- I can't be responsible for the deficiencies of mammals. -- Kurtal Duck

Em -- Aha!  My winning streak surfaces again!  It's always there, you know, but
sometimes you can't see it. -- Huw ap Huw
P.S.  I'm studying Positive Thinking.

Amputator Frog -- You tried to cut off my--!  My--!  I can't say it.  And I wasn't
going to hang around until it happened, either. -- Owain Harlson

Hammerhead -- Oh, damn.  My momma always told me not to swim in shark waters. --
Kurtal Duck

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

WAHOO was devastated by POOP SLINGER in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge Title fight.
JACK KNIFE viciously subdued KOLACTAN KABOB in a popular 4 minute Challenge match.
CATFISH HUNTER bested HUW AP HUW in a 3 minute gory Challenge contest.
ACE OF BASE was overpowered by ASSUR in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match.
HOCKEY DUCK was devastated by KIANA in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
RUBBER BULLET slimly won victory over LAZY LOOKOUT in a 4 minute Challenge match.
PORKY PIG overpowered DOMINIC in a action packed 1 minute uneven Challenge melee.
CROSS CZECH vanquished WHAT'S A VOLKSIE? in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
RED HOT CHILE PAPA was viciously subdued by AMPUTATOR FROG in a 2 minute duel.
RUPTURE was beaten by OWAIN HARLSON in a 1 minute Challenge melee.
HYDROPONICUS was beaten by ROWDY YOBBO in a exciting 2 minute fight.
DON KING demolished SURLY DECKHAND in a 1 minute mismatched competition.
PHONELESS CORD was savagely defeated by BATTLING BOB in a popular 3 minute brawl.
IMMOVEABLE OBJECT was viciously subdued by NAIHREN in a action packed 3 minute fight.
EM delivered the death blow upon BEAULIEU in a 2 minute gruesome duel.
SYSTEM OF A DOWN was overpowered by SHARK BAIT in a 1 minute mismatched brawl.
SULU was luckily beaten by BAKED CONVINCIA in a exciting 2 minute brutal bout.
MONGOL HORDE was overpowered by RALTUMAN OMELET in a 1 minute one-sided match.
KURTAL DUCK was devastated by HAMMERHEAD in a popular 1 minute one-sided contest.
PASTRAMI ELEMENTAL vanquished THRESHPACK in a 2 minute gruesome one-sided match.
HOFFA was viciously subdued by PRADUS in a tiring 20 minute brutal mismatched fray.
HOFFA luckily beat CAPTAIN KIRK in a action packed 6 minute brutal fight.
MANNY LEHMAN was overpowered by LAKE SAILOR in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
RED ALERT narrowly defeated BLACKBERRY in a exciting 1 minute gruesome uneven match.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|AIMED BLOW                      10         LUNGING ATTACK    23 -   7 -  0      77  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    7         SLASHING ATTACK   35 -  20 -  0      64  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  5         PARRY-STRIKE      12 -  11 -  1      52  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  5         PARRY-RIPOSTE      4 -   4 -  0      50  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   5         WALL OF STEEL     25 -  25 -  0      50  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   4         AIMED BLOW        49 -  52 -  2      49  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     3         BASHING ATTACK    24 -  32 -  1      43  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      3         STRIKING ATTACK   16 -  22 -  0      42  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      2         PARRY-LUNGE        6 -  13 -  0      32  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    1         TOTAL PARRY        4 -  18 -  0      18  |

Turn 593 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-STRIKE       2 -  1     WALL OF STEEL      3 -  4         2  LUNGING ATTACK 
SLASHING ATTACK    3 -  2     AIMED BLOW         4 -  6         2  AIMED BLOW     
STRIKING ATTACK    3 -  2     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  3         2  PARRY-STRIKE   
BASHING ATTACK     3 -  2     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  1         2  BASHING ATTACK 
LUNGING ATTACK     2 -  2                                       1  SLASHING ATTACK
TOTAL PARRY        1 -  1                                       1  WALL OF STEEL  
                                                                1  STRIKING ATTACK

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
SLASHING ATTACK  POOP SLINGER 24-4478       31   6  0  237 LOOK OUT!! (1514)
WALL OF STEEL    JACK KNIFE 47-6694         32  16  1  217 ROYAL FLUSH (146)
LUNGING ATTACK   ROWDY YOBBO 20-3429        48  44  1  209 SPARF! (1069)
AIMED BLOW       EM 15-3737                 38  55  1  209 LORDS OF DARKNESS (1318)
STRIKING ATTACK  DON KING 47-5374           42  36  3  206 ROYAL FLUSH (146)
PARRY-STRIKE     CATFISH HUNTER 5-3315      30  27  1  204 PARTY ANIMALS (591)
BASHING ATTACK   ASSUR 18-7821              39  95  2  199 ARROGANCE (755)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    HOCKEY DUCK 39-937         42  35  1  169 DUCKS UNLIMITED (1221)
PARRY-LUNGE      LAZY LOOKOUT 42-4504       41  38  1  162 DUNGEON CELL (1470)
TOTAL PARRY      HOFFA 18-9369              29  69  0   83 ARROGANCE (755)

The overall popularity leader is HUW AP HUW 35-3030.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was CAPTAIN KIRK 29-5754.  The ten other most popular fighters were LAZY LOOKOUT 
42-4504, KOLACTAN KABOB 65-7072, RUBBER BULLET 54-2503, JACK KNIFE 47-6694, DON KING 
47-5374, AMPUTATOR FROG 99-3206, PHONELESS CORD 54-2018, ROWDY YOBBO 20-3429, SURLY 
DECKHAND 21-6568, and SULU 29-5705.

The least popular fighter this week was HOFFA 18-8478.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were PRADUS 99-3707, MANNY LEHMAN 51-5074, WHAT'S A VOLKSIE? 38-4563, HOCKEY 
DUCK 39-937, THRESHPACK 50-138, KURTAL DUCK 78-2861, SYSTEM OF A DOWN 38-4451, 
RUPTURE 99-3463, RED HOT CHILE PAPA 73-3358, and DOMINIC 30-3545.

Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  
KALTOS(5)            1  0 0  NIATOLI ISLAND(33)   1  0 0  TROCAR(54)           1  1 0  
MALCORN(15)          1  0 1  MURSKA(35)           2  1 0  ILLIS(59)            0  1 0  
TALCAMA(18)          2  1 0  CLIFFHOME(38)        0  2 0  DAL SHANG(65)        0  1 0  
SEAM(20)             1  0 0  XOCHITHLAN(39)       0  1 0  DRAGONHEAD(72)       1  0 0  
SUNSET(21)           0  1 0  KATI-TEI(41)         0  1 0  ERINIKA(73)          1  2 0  
ZORPUNT(24)          2  0 0  RODEKI(42)           0  1 0  LIN TIRIAN(78)       1  1 0  
CALEAM(26)           0  1 0  NORTH FORK(47)       2  1 0  OLD VALAMANTIS(96)   1  0 0  
LAPUR(29)            0  3 0  SNOWBOUND(50)        1  1 0  SYVYN'S HILL(98)     1  1 0  
IAYE(30)             0  1 0  TRICORUS(51)         0  1 0  SOUTH RIDGE(99)      2  1 0  

TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 CATFISH HUNTER 5-3315       30  27  1  204  PARTY ANIMALS (591)        KALTOS
 EM 15-3737                  38  55  1  209  LORDS OF DARKNESS (1318)   MALCORN
 ASSUR 18-7821               39  95  2  199  ARROGANCE (755)            TALCAMA
 ROWDY YOBBO 20-3429         48  44  1  209  SPARF! (1069)              SEAM
 SURLY DECKHAND 21-6568      59  70  1  161  SEA DOGS (1446)            SUNSET
 POOP SLINGER 24-4478        31   6  0  237  LOOK OUT!! (1514)          ZORPUNT
 WAHOO 26-3916               33  20  1  196  HERE TO PHOENIX (1072)     CALEAM
 HYDROPONICUS 29-4605        29  12  0  188  BLUNT FORCE (1512)         LAPUR
 DOMINIC 30-3545             28  24  0  134  WRATHMEN (727)             IAYE
 SHARK BAIT 33-7652          33  29  0  161  SEA DOGS (1501)            NIATOLI ISLAND
 HUW AP HUW 35-3030          52 134  2  194  CHILDREN OF LLYR (1415)    MURSKA
 SYSTEM OF A DOWN 38-4451    31  16  1  132  TEAM FLOYD (690)           CLIFFHOME
 HOCKEY DUCK 39-937          42  35  1  169  DUCKS UNLIMITED (1221)     XOCHITHLAN
 BEAULIEU 41-3057            27  19  0  137  WRATHMEN (818)             KATI-TEI
 LAZY LOOKOUT 42-4504        41  38  1  162  DUNGEON CELL (1470)        RODEKI
 JACK KNIFE 47-6694          32  16  1  217  ROYAL FLUSH (146)          NORTH FORK
 RED ALERT 50-139            28  18  0   89  PUBLIC ENEMY (1530)        SNOWBOUND
 MANNY LEHMAN 51-5074        18  15  1   39  PANSY DIVISION (1149)      TRICORUS
 PHONELESS CORD 54-2018      47  34  0  191  USELESS TOOLS (735)        TROCAR
 IMMOVEABLE OBJECT 59-2110   49  22  2  195  NOT QUITE (1237)           ILLIS
 KOLACTAN KABOB 65-7072      28   4  3  197  SHEWISH BUFFET (1528)      DAL SHANG
 PORKY PIG 72-5953           30  20  2  155  MEAT YOUR MAKER (1439)     DRAGONHEAD
 CROSS CZECH 73-4008         19  14  3  109  WORLDWIDE GORE (913)       ERINIKA
 RALTUMAN OMELET 78-2857     16   2  2  100  SHEWISH BUFFET (1537)      LIN TIRIAN
 PASTRAMI ELEMENTAL 96-3748  15  11  3   64  ARCANE GREATS FTF (1519)   OLD VALAMANTIS
 BAKED CONVINCIA 98-2341     22  18  4  137  SHEWISH BANQUET (1515)     SYVYN'S HILL
 AMPUTATOR FROG 99-3206      16  13  4  107  BLOOD FROG 3 (1511)        SOUTH RIDGE