DARKHOLM SPORTING JOURNAL
Date : 10/04/2003 Duedate: 10/17/2003
DARKHOLM
DM-104 TURN-359
RANK TEAMS W L K % RANK TEAMS W L K %
1 THUNDR + LITE 18/309 1127 420 7 72.9 TROOPERS 21/1113
2-TOTEM 74/1146 47 22 2 68.1 10 NIGHT TRAIN 37/545 7 7 0 50.0
THAT SUCKS! 19/1144 NIGHT TRAIN 6/1158
DEATH STUDS VIII 82/1086 11 THE A TEAM 38/1044 569 572 6 49.9
3 MONGREL HORDE 10/964 480 232 3 67.4 BIG MEAN FISH 18/292
4 BELLYFLOP 82/1097 1402 1138 14 55.2 GUANO GROUP 51/1065
STREET PIZZAD I 82/1096 ONE SURFING HINDU 97/1071
WHY I PLAY DM 82/1116 FURNITURE BARN 42/1109
WHAT I ATE FOR XMAS 82/1114 LOOK OUT BELOW 6/1042
MY WIFE'S COSMETICS 82/1038 12 SHAMROCKS 58/424 153 161 3 48.7
CHEAP DENTISTRY 82/1098 13 THE MENTORS 10/408 28 35 0 44.4
STREET PIZZA 18/114 14 BEAST MASTERS 37/136 91 130 1 41.2
4-LETTER WORDS 48/1063 ELEMENTS OF PSI 58/423
SESAME SPINE 82/1070 ACTS OF NATURE 6/415
PARENTHOOD 82/1122 15 CRIMINAL ELE 39/1074 17 26 0 39.5
ROCK BOTTOM 82/1080 INDULGENT DRINKS 54/1153
FASCINATIN' RYTHYM 82/1152 16 NINJAS 7/1107 32 54 1 37.2
5 STYROFOAM 82/1090 1115 966 8 53.6 RESURRECTION 2/1143
6-EXODUS! 3/956 430 375 3 53.4 GENOCIDE 51/1110
SPIDERS FROM MARS 21/950 KILLERS 41/1145
THE TAO 36/923 17 DELVERS 42/1000 191 326 1 36.9
THE DARK TEMPLE 18/978 DOGS OF WAR 4/999
FIANADHA 69/945 GAMES LIBRARY 3/998
7 DOH! 24/1147 1446 1279 6 53.1 18 JOHNS 5/927 731 1284 16 36.3
THINGSINPUG'SCOOLER 4/1088 SCARRY TEAM 36/824
DP CLONES 24/1045 ARROGANCE 18/732
WASTELAND 18/468 JUST BECAUSE 38/1151
PEPPER PRACTICE II 57/1069 THE LADY'S LIST 6/917
I'M SO SEXY 42/1072 LETHAL LADIES 4/768
DIABLO TOO 23/1037 19 BIG BAD 7/1073 425 794 8 34.9
WASTELAND II 7/500 SHEPHERDS 18/432
OUTSIDE IS 48/1061 THIS LITTLE PRIGGY 25/1162
COOL WHEELS 58/943 SUPER BASH BROTHERS 6/1067
BAD HAND 24/1125 NEXT GENERATION 58/1075
CEMENTIA 61/1112 NEXT GENERATION 18/1150
DIABLO ALSO 24/1163 FOUND IN THE SAND 32/1034
8 QUBIT 10/1140 523 466 2 52.9 MIGHTY MORALS 51/1120
ON A WHIM 82/1014 20 DWARVEN LEGI 21/1139 3 6 0 33.3
SIR AGLIO 10/600 21 TOWNSVILLAIN 10/1089 10 23 0 30.3
9-DEAD EVIL 18/627 27 25 2 51.9
'##/###' Avoid teams by their Team Id '-' Team did not fight this turn
WARRIOR SPOTLIGHT
+ ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ Eye of the Storm #65 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +
In the Far West:
The ship approaching them was running on oars; it had no mast that they could
see, but two banks of oars dipped and rose in practiced unison, glittering as
sunlight hit the water falling from the blades. It was considerably longer than the
gladiators' vessel, and narrower in proportion, but there was still room on that lean
deck for a cluster of armed men. It was headed straight for them, picking up speed
as it came.
Vurand cursed. "That's no pirate," the Orc said, turning to run toward the
stern of the ship. "That's a damned warship, and it's going to ram us!"
Ashon Chang and Werre had also seen the approaching ship, and Chang was running
toward the bow; he passed Vurand half way. "Not enough wind to avoid them," he said
in passing.
Jammies looked both ways, uncertain what it would be best to do, and decided to
wait for orders from someone more knowledgeable.
Reaching Herlas and Rughal, who were glaring at each other near the bow, Ashon
Chang said, "We are about to be rammed by a warship. Can either of you do anything
about it?"
Both men jerked and looked toward the approaching vessel.
"I can do little with the Arcanum in this state," Herlas said, "and nothing with
that barbarian watching me--"
Rughal, who looked as though he hadn't eaten or slept since Shania disappeared,
glared at him suspiciously. "What did you have in mind?"
"I might be able to do something with...oh, fog, maybe, and wind," the Fratsfan
said thoughtfully. "Weather is easily influenced, being naturally so unstable. But
we could as well crash into those rocks ourselves, running blind," he added.
Rughal glanced at the rocks, which were tall chimneys and small islands rising
straight out of the sea, then at the approaching warship. "A fog to hide both us and
that other ship," he said, "and on a count of ten after the fog appears, a strong
wind at an angle to take us through that gap." He indicated a passage between two
islands with a tilt of his head, not wanting to point and be seen from the attacking
ship. "Ashon, tell Werre. On the count of ten after the fog, change course--"
"To pass between those two islands, which we won't see until we're right on
them, but you're correct, it's a chance worth taking." The samurai turned and raced
back to the stern.
"I don't know if I'll have the strength to hold the fog and especially the wind
for long," Herlas warned. "I don't want to be rammed or captured, but my power has
limits."
Rughal bared his teeth in a hard grin. "I'll help you."
"But--!"
"Or stop you. Your choice."
Herlas said something under his breath. It might have been swearing. He put
his hands over his face for a moment, then straightened up and glanced at Rughal.
"Very well. I begin."
It began with a little haze, just the thinnest veil of sun-gilded mist. Nothing
to cause the most wary of mariners any concern. Rughal could see sweat forming on
Herlas' face and decided that it was time to join in. He gripped the Fratsfan's
shoulders, focused his mind and hiu, and visualized himself as a wall at the man's
back, bracing him in the effort he was making.
Herlas responded immediately. The mist shimmered and suddenly turned to a heavy
fog. Rughal began counting out loud while the wizard groped for the reins of the
wind. The ship wallowed underfoot as the wind that had been driving it faltered,
then quickened again as the count reached ten.
*** ***** *** ***** ***
Shania Silverstar stared at the stone for several minutes. It was...no longer a
thing of power. No longer the Eye of the West. Dull-surfaced, lightless, dead. She
set it gently back in the niche these people had appointed for it. As soon as her
hands lifted from the stone, a faint crazing ran over the surface, deepened, and
suddenly the stone collapsed into a pile of dust.
"Well, that is one question answered," she murmured. "I won't have to tell the
people here that the stone is dead. They'll be able to see for them--"
She turned at a cry of alarm and fury from the doorway.
The man, the priest, who had spoken to her before stood there, staring. "Woman,
what have you done?" he demanded.
Shania raised an eyebrow. "I have absorbed the essence of the stone," she said
coolly. "I am now...the Eye of the West."
"No! That's impossible!"
"It's the truth." It seemed likely that he would attack her in his shock and
rage, and she readied herself to defend. She was a mage of no small ability, though
her power was currently much below normal, and the arena had trained her to use her
hands as weapons. She was aware, also, that with the power from the stone had come
certain abilities--there was no time to explore the possibilities, but some of them
were bound to be useful in combat. If this fool thought she was defenseless, he
would be surprised. Very surprised.
The man rushed at her and grabbed the front of her shift, presumably to shake
her. She swept up one arm to block and break away his grip, chopped into the side of
his neck with the edge of her hand, and as he began to fall away, snapped a kick into
his side. His collapse was gratifying, but there was no time to stand around and
admire her handiwork. He had no sword but did carry a dagger, which she
appropriated. An obsidian blade and a gold-inlaid handle. Probably ceremonial.
Well, it would still kill at need, no doubt. She took his outer robe, as well,
because it had a hood that would conceal her pale hair; she had a suspicion that
these people were all or mostly dark.
By the time she'd gotten the robe off him, he was beginning to twitch. Shania
looked at him thoughtfully, then hit him again on the side of the head behind his
ear, using the butt of his dagger. He subsided. She briefly contemplated tearing
his undergarment into strips and bind him, but it would take too long. She had to be
away from here NOW, before the other priests--there were bound to be others--showed
up to assist at the sacrifice.
She tucked the dagger into the sleeve of her borrowed robe, where it would be
instantly available at need, and opened the door.
+ ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ The Tides of Magic #13 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +
Not Lirin Kiv:
The carriage moved through the streets slowly, as though the driver was feeling
his way in the fog. The fog wasn't heavy enough to justify that kind of groping
progress, but Shylock kept quiet. No point in berating the driver. Besides, the
Lord Protector was also making full use of the chance to stare around. So was
Clemenda, he noted, well, that was okay, too. He didn't normally like people around
him to be TOO alert, but in this peculiar situation, no telling what might be
significant and who might notice it first.
The temple to Somebody Who Wasn't Mantor vanished behind them. Shylock counted
turns and blocks of buildings and finally set his teeth against possible disaster and
looked toward where the arena should have been. Hmm. Not the same structure, but
there were points of similarity.
It might be an arena.
He could hope so. There were things about the gladiatorial system on the Isle
and off it that he didn't like, that he KNEW he could have arranged better, but at
least it would provide a point of contact where he and whoever lived in this world
could begin to understand each other. And understanding--up to a point--was
important. It was the first step to power and control. And power and control were
essential; without them, a man was a mere puppet in the hands of others...such as
Sheila Greywand. If this world had no Sheila Greywand...the possibilities were
enticing. He might decide to stay here.
But first, he had to establish contacts.
Shylock stepped down from the carriage and turned to give Clemenda a hand. Not
that she needed help, but it made a good appearance. And so did she. Her clothing
was more restrained than an Adantri would wear, but she looked good in it. She would
also look good out of it.... He suppressed that thought sternly. Not now. Right
now, he needed to meet people and find out where they were, why, and what, if
anything, could be done about it.
*** ***** *** ***** ***
It was an arena, more or less. But the warriors who competed here, Shylock
decided, could not reasonably be called "gladiators." At least, Master Dan Shao, who
was approximately the arenamaster, rejected that term vigorously and with many
scornful comments about the "depravity of the Thallians, with their lust to see the
blood of others."
"We are Champions," Dan Shao said sternly. "Every member of this community is a
champion of his city and style. We fight here as an offering to the great god
Mantor, and to further the development of our various styles."
Shylock nodded. Basically, that was the attitude that many of the warriors in
Lirin Kiv took, although the system itself didn't support such a position. He
sometimes wondered how Lirith Kai had come to allow the arenas into its cities, since
the philosophy behind them was so alien to the native culture. No doubt Sheila
Greywand had brought pressure to bear on the Emperor. He'd heard she did things like
that, and he could believe it. Sheila Greywand was definitely someone who understood
power and enjoyed using it. That, too, was something to pursue at another time. For
now....
"I don't understand how you got here," Dan Shao said, scowling suspiciously.
"Magic, I suppose." His voice became deeply disapproving.
"I suppose it must have been," Shylock agreed. "But it wasn't OUR magic. We
had simply set out for dinner in a neighboring town, and the world as we knew it
vanished, leaving us here."
"Some kind of interdimensional gate." The arenamaster's disapproval deepened.
"What do you propose to do about it?"
"In what sense?" Shylock asked cautiously.
"An unregistered gate is a Bad Thing!" Dan Shao thundered. "You, as the people
most closely connected with it, have the responsibility of closing it. Best to waste
no time about it, either."
"With us on the other side, I suppose," the gladiator grumbled.
"Well..." Dan Shao looked at Clemenda appreciatively, "that isn't essential.
It's the gate itself that matters."
THE GUARDIAN'S FORUM
Reflections by the Keeper of the Runeblade
Assur, in his blindness, failed to tell me that I needed to actually write a column
when I acquired the Runeblade from Mahi Mahi. Mahi Mahi was a fool to tell his
secret of success to us all. He should have known better for I am older even than
him (and his secret was that he was older than dirt).
It was a good fight, though, with both of us hitting the other and having a good old
fashioned all out battle. He hit me 3 times while I hit him twice. My armor, no
doubt, helped me withstand his blows. He decided to go without protection and that
might have been the difference in the fight.
Last turn, I faced Dr Nut, who gave me a chance to practice some of the offensive
moves I've been learning. My real hope is to be able next turn to face Voldric
again. I'm also looking towards retiring with a winning record!
I give my challenge to Dusky Jawfish, who clearly deserves a chance to be shown what
a Grand Challenger Champion should look like on the sands, having earned the position
himself. Plus, Big Wave Dave runs Dusky and of all the IT alliance members, Big Wave
Dave is clearly the most fishy. AND BWD plays dirty Old Maid (at least Assur says
so).
See you next turn!
-- Barroch, the warrior who TV'd Eligibles without even an Advanced Master in Defense
or Parry....
REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER
Good morning, warriors of the Federation!
Life was most challenged. JOB (18-6129) (19-121-0,120) of SHEPHERDS challenged
LIFE (3-4196) (34-119-0,135) of GAMES LIBRARY. JOB narrowly defeated LIFE in a
popular 6 minute bloody Challenge brawl. Oh my, look at those records! No wonder it
was a close one. As the warriors limped from the arena, Life was heard to remark,
"...during the ENTIRE fight he had his buttons open and there were PLAID shorts but
it reminded me that I STILL have not received my SUPERIOR gender attachment which
would come with BLACK SILK shorts and I think they should POST someone at the gate to
make sure EVERY warrior's fly is done up before they are ALLOWED to step out..." I'd
like to take this opportunity to enquire of all the local barmaids: who would like
to sign up for fly detail?
Shepherds (19th in today's listings) were most avoided by DP Clones (7th), who
perhaps did not want to encounter any plaid shorts. Really Assur, you might want to
issue them all a nice understated blue...although a warrior of Job's long history is
surely entitled to wear whatever he wants.
The Commission granted but one TV challenge, which was for the title: BARROCH
(18-2684) (86-87-1,274) of SHEPHERDS TV challenged DUSKY JAWFISH (18-6978) (37-33-
1,211) of BIG MEAN FISH. BARROCH devastated DUSKY JAWFISH in a 1 minute mismatched
Challenge Title fight. You can see that Barroch is approaching the winning record
that he desires, helped along in his quest by the column that he remembered to write.
And the man he wants to fight, Voldric the Blue, is now in range! VOLDRIC THE BLUE
(18-6259) (57-44-0,210) of THUNDR + LITENING fought OBSESSIVE (58-2447) (38-33-1,187)
of ELEMENTS OF PSI. VOLDRIC THE BLUE viciously subdued OBSESSIVE in a crowd pleasing
4 minute fight. So we're looking forward to seeing that battle next turn. This will
be a lunger vs. TP fight giving Voldric perhaps a slight advantage, though not as
much as back in the basic arenas. At least we may hope the fight will be long enough
that if you blink, you won't miss it.
Oh no, Sex on the Beach is back in the bottom spot even after making what looked
like a wise challenge to begin climbing the list! SEX ON THE BEACH (54-2435) (18-6-
3,44) of INDULGENT DRINKS challenged WENT TO MARKET (25-4288) (14-9-2,50) of THIS
LITTLE PRIGGY. SEX ON THE BEACH was devastated by WENT TO MARKET in a 1 minute
Challenge brawl. Still it was a good try and I'm sure Sex will get up out of the
cellar before long.
No one died. I can't tell you how much it distresses me that warriors in
Darkholm are so seldom killed. It means you aren't trying hard enough! Come on,
what are you afraid of? It's not permanent!
As usual, Lee at Tourney is our most popular warrior. A woman, no less! I do
miss Hansel. She won her fight though, always a bit of a surprise in a popularity
leader. SILAS (18-6796) (32-55-2,183) of SHEPHERDS challenged LEE AT TOURNEY (4-
3565) (103-117-1,238) of LETHAL LADIES. SILAS was demolished by LEE AT TOURNEY in a
1 minute one-sided Challenge melee. Lee actually made it into the stylemasters.
Well done!
And the most popular warrior this turn, the one the rabble perceived as being
scummed, was Tornado. TORNADO (6-2249) (24-30-2,168) of ACTS OF NATURE fought
MAGINOT MIKE (4-4509) (50-52-1,112) of DOGS OF WAR. TORNADO savagely defeated
MAGINOT MIKE in an action packed 6 minute bloody competition. I can't quite see how
anyone would mistake that fight for a scumfest.
Now if you want to talk scumfest...ETCHED IN STONE (61-3112) (29-11-0,181) of
CEMENTIA challenged A DIFFERENT GRAPE (82-1258) (30-16-0,183) of MY WIFE'S COSMETICS.
ETCHED IN STONE outwaited A DIFFERENT GRAPE in an unpopular 27 minute Challenge
brawl. Etched is our least favored warrior this turn, and I can't understand why A
Different Grape didn't make the unpopularity list as well. It takes two to scum for
half an hour!
I have been wondering where all our Tournament Victors have gone. Surely the
Federation produces the most dangerous warriors in all the known world. I suppose
most of them are in Primus or beyond...but isn't there a new crop coming up? Does
anyone know? Because getting regularly outdone by Free Blades is quite unacceptable.
If anyone knows a Tournament Victor who belongs is Darkholm and isn't fighting here,
or isn't fighting at all, go kick them in the butt and tell them to get over here!
Desiree
KEEPER OF THE RUNEBLADE W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
BARROCH 18-2684 87 87 1 289 SHEPHERDS (432) TALCAMA
GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
SPEEDI 58-3029 90 76 3 301 SHAMROCKS (424) DELARQ TOR
MISS HONEY 36-4850 60 51 0 250 SCARRY TEAM (824) JHANS
WHIRLING DOG 10-4177 59 29 1 249 MONGREL HORDE (964) KOLACT
LEE AT TOURNEY 4-3565 104 117 1 245 LETHAL LADIES (768) JHELUM
BUUL THE BULL 2-4840 36 37 1 225 RESURRECTION (1143) NIANIA
-BUNNY WAILER 3-5356 32 19 0 225 EXODUS! (956) OSKSI
LARGE SPINNY GUY 23-4361 51 29 2 224 DIABLO TOO (1037) TI
-SYPHILIS 19-3085 84 48 2 223 THAT SUCKS! (1144) ZUWAYZA
MAHI MAHI 18-4899 82 59 1 220 BIG MEAN FISH (292) TALCAMA
FAT BASTARD 42-3804 46 21 0 219 I'M SO SEXY (1072) RODEKI
VOLDRIC THE BLUE 18-6259 58 44 0 218 THUNDR + LITENING (309) TALCAMA
SLAYER II 10-2125 34 24 1 218 THE MENTORS (408) KOLACT
DR DAZZLE 57-4485 42 25 0 216 PEPPER PRACTICE II (1069) ANDOR
-MAJOR TOM 21-4598 40 31 1 215 SPIDERS FROM MARS (950) SUNSET
WHIRLING WORD 48-3815 49 31 0 214 4-LETTER WORDS (1063) CAER
GRAND CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
CLEANER WRASSE 18-6495 58 56 2 208 BIG MEAN FISH (292) TALCAMA
RYGEL 18-7142 38 27 0 208 WASTELAND (468) TALCAMA
COOLER 82-7277 27 12 1 208 STYROFOAM (1090) DWES EG
MUCKER 42-3596 47 53 1 207 DELVERS (1000) RODEKI
-DIERDRE 69-9439 37 36 1 205 FIANADHA (945) CIMMERIAC
BRAHMA 97-731 26 28 4 205 ONE SURFING HINDU (1071) SHADOW GROVE
-T-BONE 18-3402 32 22 3 204 DEAD EVIL (627) TALCAMA
SCHYLER 6-4866 48 80 1 202 THE LADY'S LIST (917) TRANSEL
-STORM XCIX 82-14095 20 6 1 202 DEATH STUDS VIII (1086) DWES EG
-LADY STARDUST 21-4601 46 21 2 201 SPIDERS FROM MARS (950) SUNSET
SHOCKING TOAD 7-310 47 60 1 200 NINJAS (1107) BONSUR
JACK BOY 82-2030 64 50 0 199 ON A WHIM (1014) DWES EG
-TRANQUILITY 36-3765 47 37 3 199 THE TAO (923) JHANS
OSCAR THE SLOUCH 82-1316 38 29 3 199 SESAME SPINE (1070) DWES EG
DARK GUMBY 7-4694 41 27 0 198 WASTELAND II (500) BONSUR
NO SALARY CAP 82-6494 19 6 1 197 WHY I PLAY DM (1116) DWES EG
GEO METRO 58-5740 59 61 2 196 COOL WHEELS (943) DELARQ TOR
FACEMAN 38-4129 39 35 2 195 THE A TEAM (1044) CLIFFHOME
CHICK WITH A STICK 23-4365 40 40 1 193 DIABLO TOO (1037) TI
SIR ENE 10-4360 39 25 3 193 SIR AGLIO (600) KOLACT
BLACK WIDOW 37-1303 51 59 2 192 BEAST MASTERS (136) SIBIKHAS
OBSESSIVE 58-2447 38 34 1 192 ELEMENTS OF PSI (423) DELARQ TOR
ETCHED IN STONE 61-3112 30 11 0 191 CEMENTIA (1112) JURINE
FLOATING SWISS 4-4461 21 13 0 191 THINGSINPUG'SCOOLER (1088) JHELUM
BLINKY 18-2683 72 114 4 190 SHEPHERDS (432) TALCAMA
DUSKY JAWFISH 18-6978 37 34 1 190 BIG MEAN FISH (292) TALCAMA
SUE E. SYDE 39-3240 36 27 1 189 CRIMINAL ELEMENT (1074) XOCHITHLAN
SPLURGE ON WAX LIP 18-6485 49 37 1 188 STREET PIZZA (114) TALCAMA
MR PIBB 24-4253 51 20 1 187 DP CLONES (1045) ZORPUNT
-BODHISATVA 36-4027 35 25 0 187 THE TAO (923) JHANS
JANET RENO 42-3823 33 32 1 187 I'M SO SEXY (1072) RODEKI
-GRIZZLY 74-2710 41 41 0 185 TOTEM (1146) DAIYLA KIV
3-7-2-D-S 82-5727 33 27 0 185 FASCINATIN' RYTHYM (1152) DWES EG
CHRISTIANITY 51-4965 37 32 0 184 GENOCIDE (1110) TRICORUS
ZALTAN 6-4616 54 106 2 183 THE LADY'S LIST (917) TRANSEL
GREE CHAK 41-3859 37 25 2 183 KILLERS (1145) KATI-TEI
DRUNK AND AT DENNY 82-2255 34 33 2 183 ROCK BOTTOM (1080) DWES EG
A DIFFERENT GRAPE 82-1258 30 17 0 182 MY WIFE'S COSMETICS (1038) DWES EG
-SID VICIOUS 18-6054 30 23 2 181 THE DARK TEMPLE (978) TALCAMA
GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
BASS 5-3666 48 83 2 180 JOHNS (927) KALTOS
GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
DR NUT 24-4254 42 25 2 179 DP CLONES (1045) ZORPUNT
LUCRETIA BORGIA 4-3563 91 130 0 178 LETHAL LADIES (768) JHELUM
HOT 48-3858 39 39 2 178 OUTSIDE IS (1061) CAER
SILAS 18-6796 32 56 2 177 SHEPHERDS (432) TALCAMA
-SMILES 21-3207 25 16 3 177 TROOPERS (1113) SUNSET
OH WELL 10-2205 26 23 4 176 THE MENTORS (408) KOLACT
HARLEQUIN TUSKFISH 18-6977 38 32 0 173 BIG MEAN FISH (292) TALCAMA
BIGFATHAIRYDEAL 82-1321 20 7 1 172 STREET PIZZAD I (1096) DWES EG
SINISTER MIDGET 6-5113 35 41 5 170 LOOK OUT BELOW (1042) TRANSEL
TORNADO 6-2249 25 30 2 170 ACTS OF NATURE (415) TRANSEL
TOLAIS DEEPHEART 42-1620 79 92 0 167 DELVERS (1000) RODEKI
DOC STEELE 18-6808 38 52 1 167 ARROGANCE (732) TALCAMA
MOJO JOJO 10-4643 26 26 2 163 TOWNSVILLAINS (1089) KOLACT
DAVID CARUSO 82-2269 18 8 1 162 BELLYFLOP (1097) DWES EG
A NEW PONY! 82-1306 16 15 0 162 WHAT I ATE FOR XMAS (1114) DWES EG
LUIGI 6-5142 28 31 2 160 SUPER BASH BROTHERS (1067) TRANSEL
EXCREMENTO 51-4968 38 32 1 153 GUANO GROUP (1065) TRICORUS
DOC STEELE 18-6010 48 100 6 152 ARROGANCE (732) TALCAMA
GRAND ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
SHINY PENNY 32-3789 28 59 2 140 FOUND IN THE SAND (1034) ARVAT
JOB 18-6129 20 121 0 136 SHEPHERDS (432) TALCAMA
-THE HUNGER 21-4622 19 7 1 136 SPIDERS FROM MARS (950) SUNSET
BEAR 7-4628 24 32 1 132 BIG BAD (1073) BONSUR
LINK 6-5144 25 32 2 129 SUPER BASH BROTHERS (1067) TRANSEL
THANOS 37-1406 24 28 2 129 NIGHT TRAIN (545) SIBIKHAS
LIFE 3-4196 34 120 0 125 GAMES LIBRARY (998) OSKSI
MAGINOT MIKE 4-4509 50 53 1 124 DOGS OF WAR (999) JHELUM
SLEEPLESS PARANOIA 82-2252 12 13 1 108 PARENTHOOD (1122) DWES EG
HOCKEY 82-5719 16 15 0 102 CHEAP DENTISTRY (1098) DWES EG
GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
ROB A. REE 39-3241 28 15 0 100 CRIMINAL ELEMENT (1074) XOCHITHLAN
THE WICKER KING 42-3904 20 17 0 100 FURNITURE BARN (1109) RODEKI
ELI 18-7272 19 23 3 100 SHEPHERDS (432) TALCAMA
MIMIC BLENNY 18-7541 22 12 1 95 BIG MEAN FISH (292) TALCAMA
GRAND INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
LUC STARWALKER 58-6100 26 30 0 88 NEXT GENERATION (1075) DELARQ TOR
SLAYER 3 10-2530 23 10 1 87 THE MENTORS (408) KOLACT
QUID PRO QUO 10-4794 24 7 1 75 QUBIT (1140) KOLACT
PATIENCE 51-4949 18 27 1 74 MIGHTY MORALS (1120) TRICORUS
TRUMP 24-4359 25 19 1 73 BAD HAND (1125) ZORPUNT
ARSONIST ART 39-3325 22 15 0 73 CRIMINAL ELEMENT (1074) XOCHITHLAN
NUMBERED WON 18-7434 17 19 0 71 NEXT GENERATION (1150) TALCAMA
PROFFESSOR GRIM 10-2613 16 11 0 66 THE MENTORS (408) KOLACT
WENT TO MARKET 25-4288 15 9 2 65 THIS LITTLE PRIGGY (1162) LYRATILAN
ZOT ZIPZIG 6-5688 15 13 0 63 NIGHT TRAIN (1158) TRANSEL
BRADEN 6-4867 46 82 0 56 THE LADY'S LIST (917) TRANSEL
TYRONE 21-1769 29 21 1 56 DWARVEN LEGION (1139) SUNSET
-JOHN ASHCROFT 24-4355 16 9 2 53 DOH! (1147) ZORPUNT
HUGE TWIRLING MAN 24-4457 17 6 0 52 DIABLO ALSO (1163) ZORPUNT
MEN WORKING 38-4189 24 36 1 50 JUST BECAUSE (1151) CLIFFHOME
-QUEUE 18-7756 15 4 1 50 NEXT GENERATION (1150) TALCAMA
SEX ON THE BEACH 54-2435 18 7 3 38 INDULGENT DRINKS (1153) TROCAR
'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.
THE DEAD W L K TEAM NAME SLAIN BY TURN
PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE
Desiree -- Gosh, sorry to confuse you! I guess your head must be just, you know,
totally full of the brown hair that makes you artificially intelligent, huh? But
this cute hotdog vender with a great tan was, like, tickling me while I wrote that.
It should have been eight TV challenges. There were more challenges that weren't TV.
Probably just radio, but that's okay. You can take a radio to the beach, but not a
TV. And anyway, the tan you get from a TV is not as good as a totally natural tan.
-- Debby Tonte
It is a good turn when one of your warriors gets skill #119! It is even better when
two do it! -- Assur
Tolais -- Assur wants me in the arena! I'd much rather be tending the sheep! Yet it
seems the gap between us is closing! -- Silas
Life of Osksi -- I've been trying to challenge, but one or both of us all seems to
get interference! Perhaps this turn! Looking forward to continuing our historic
bouts. You've been the victor every time so far, but I continue to improve and one
day, perhaps, I will even beat you and return to you the honor of being the single
worst warrior on the sands! Until then, though, you'll have to settle for second
worst! Certainly, it will be a long day before another equals our mediocrity!
Survival alone, is no easy feat. The best today are:
Duff of Illis, with 65 losses to his credit!
Dumb, Dumb of Iaye, with 48 losses to his credit!
Wow, Duff is within a year of taking your loss record away (if he loses every one)!
-- Job of Talcama
Mucker -- So, have you fixed your problem yet? Inquiring minds want to know! --
Blinky
Desiree -- Please forgive Debby Tonte, a blonde can not be expected to get her facts
correct all the time. We had more than eight challenges in Free Blades the turn in
question. Debby forgot to put the qualifier, TV, in between the word eight and the
word challenges. It should have read, "We had sixty-two fights and eight TV
challenge matches this week." There were actually a total of twenty-eight challenge
matches for the turn. -- Rillion
Silas -- Will next time be my turn again? -- Tolais Deepheart
Miss Honey -- You can be as rude as you want, sweet thing, and I won't even notice.
-- Mucker
Sid Vicious -- I don't know if there's any chance of getting Desiree to do Life's
personal again.... -- Nick
The Wicker King -- Yay! (jumping up and down) Did you see that? "My skill at
arms," it says. And I attacked a lot. Pretty good, huh? -- Maginot Mike
P.S. Wicker armor doesn't do it. Just a hint.
Desiree -- "Too intellectual?" You say that of ME? You DARE to imply that *I*, Life
of Osksi, a perfectly created golem, might lack intellect? -- Life of Osksi
P.S. So you dye your hair brown, this makes you SMART? As if!
Hmm, I didn't realize Life could channel Debby Tonte. -- Nick
9 September 2003
WE'RE LOOKING FOR A FEW GOOD MANAGERS! If you think you have what it takes to match
wits and blades with some of the best managers in Alastari, then WE WANT YOU! The
Tournament Of The Golden Scrod #4 will begin in Aradi (DM 60) the turn after the Fall
Mail-In. It's not too late for you to sign up. I realize that many of you may be
hesitant after seeing that myself and Hombre have teamed up again, but we'll try to
take it easy on you guys a little bit. For more information on T#%S IV, please
contact me at ganolus@aol.com. We're looking for a few good managers...the few, the
proud, the TOGS!
-- Ganolus Oakleaf, T#%S IV Commish
15 September 2003
An Announcement Concerning the Brotherhood of the Blade Alliance:
I have chosen to withdraw my membership from the Brotherhood of the Blade
alliance. The years I have spent in the alliance have been the best of my DM career.
I leave the alliance with many great friends and will always remain close to my
former brethren.
The Brotherhood of the Blade will not skip a beat without my membership. It
remains in very capable hands and its roster is among the strongest in the game.
With the return on some of its founding members to DM, I know the BOB will continue
to grow in strength and prestige in the years to come. -- The Sandman
29 September 2003
All -- Let it be known that the Firm accepts SOL into its ranks. The Firm is:
SunGod, Dark Spirit, Youngblood, Tripwire, and SOL.
LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS
BARROCH devastated DUSKY JAWFISH in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge Title fight.
SILAS was demolished by LEE AT TOURNEY in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge melee.
ETCHED IN STONE outwaited A DIFFERENT GRAPE in a unpopular 27 minute Challenge brawl.
SLAYER II overpowered CHICK WITH A STICK in a 2 minute mismatched Challenge match.
CHRISTIANITY overpowered MOJO JOJO in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge struggle.
OH WELL was unbelievably bested by BLINKY in a action packed 3 minute Challenge fight.
SUE E. SYDE viciously subdued LUCRETIA BORGIA in a 2 minute Challenge duel.
GREE CHAK vanquished EXCREMENTO in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
LINK was overpowered by DOC STEELE in a popular 2 minute uneven Challenge match.
BEAR was overpowered by SINISTER MIDGET in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge match.
SHINY PENNY was handily defeated by TOLAIS DEEPHEART in a 1 minute Challenge contest.
JOB narrowly defeated LIFE in a popular 6 minute bloody Challenge brawl.
ELI was handily defeated by DOC STEELE in a popular 1 minute uneven Challenge fight.
LUC STARWALKER devastated BRADEN in a exciting 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
SEX ON THE BEACH was devastated by WENT TO MARKET in a 1 minute Challenge brawl.
NUMBERED WON overpowered MEN WORKING in a exciting 1 minute one-sided Challenge bout.
PATIENCE savagely defeated TYRONE in a popular 2 minute bloody Challenge match.
ARSONIST ART was bested by HOCKEY in a popular 2 minute Challenge contest.
DR DAZZLE defeated 3-7-2-D-S in a exciting 1 minute duel.
SPEEDI savagely defeated JACK BOY in a action packed 2 minute gruesome fray.
GEO METRO was devastated by MAHI MAHI in a popular 1 minute one-sided bout.
OSCAR THE SLOUCH was overpowered by SOLACIA in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
WHIRLING DOG overpowered BLACK WIDOW in a 2 minute one-sided duel.
MISS HONEY overpowered JANET RENO in a exciting 1 minute uneven match.
MR PIBB was vanquished by BUUL THE BULL in a action packed 1 minute one-sided fray.
RYGEL overpowered DRUNK AND AT DENNYS in a exciting 1 minute gory uneven competition.
CLEANER WRASSE overpowered DR NUT in a popular 1 minute brutal uneven duel.
SPLURGE ON WAX LIPS was demolished by FAT BASTARD in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
HARLEQUIN TUSKFISH was overpowered by SHOCKING TOAD in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
LARGE SPINNY GUY handily defeated SIR ENE in a 1 minute mismatched match.
VOLDRIC THE BLUE viciously subdued OBSESSIVE in a crowd pleasing 4 minute fight.
FLOATING SWISS savagely defeated DAVID CARUSO in a exciting 3 minute struggle.
FACEMAN overpowered LUIGI in a crowd pleasing 1 minute one-sided match.
BASS was demolished by DARK GUMBY in a 2 minute one-sided duel.
COOLER overpowered ZALTAN in a crowd pleasing 2 minute brutal one-sided duel.
BRAHMA handily defeated A NEW PONY! in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
MUCKER overpowered BIGFATHAIRYDEAL in a action packed 1 minute uneven battle.
WHIRLING WORD bested SCHYLER in a crowd pleasing 4 minute gruesome match.
HOT was handily defeated by NO SALARY CAP in a 1 minute mismatched fight.
TORNADO savagely defeated MAGINOT MIKE in a action packed 6 minute bloody competition.
SLEEPLESS PARANOIA was demolished by THANOS in a exciting 1 minute one-sided match.
ROB A. REE overpowered HUGE TWIRLING MAN in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
SLAYER 3 was beaten by THE WICKER KING in a popular 3 minute fray.
PROFFESSOR GRIM was overcome by QUID PRO QUO in a 2 minute duel.
ZOT ZIPZIG was subdued by TRUMP in a 2 minute match.
MIMIC BLENNY overcame BOOKIE'S GUARD in a exciting 1 minute bout.
BATTLE REPORT
MOST POPULAR RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS
|FIGHTING STYLE FIGHTS FIGHTING STYLE W - L - K PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK 24 TOTAL PARRY 54 - 41 - 0 57 |
|WALL OF STEEL 15 WALL OF STEEL 84 - 67 - 0 56 |
|BASHING ATTACK 13 LUNGING ATTACK 152 - 131 - 1 54 |
|AIMED BLOW 11 SLASHING ATTACK 51 - 44 - 4 54 |
|TOTAL PARRY 8 PARRY-LUNGE 25 - 23 - 0 52 |
|SLASHING ATTACK 7 PARRY-STRIKE 14 - 15 - 1 48 |
|PARRY-LUNGE 5 AIMED BLOW 51 - 64 - 0 44 |
|STRIKING ATTACK 5 STRIKING ATTACK 21 - 27 - 0 44 |
|PARRY-STRIKE 2 BASHING ATTACK 46 - 80 - 3 37 |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 - 0 - 0 0 |
Turn 359 was great if you Not so great if you used The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles: the fighting styles: top eleven warriors are:
PARRY-STRIKE 2 - 0 AIMED BLOW 5 - 6 4 LUNGING ATTACK
WALL OF STEEL 9 - 6 SLASHING ATTACK 3 - 4 1 WALL OF STEEL
LUNGING ATTACK 14 - 10 PARRY-LUNGE 2 - 3 1 PARRY-LUNGE
STRIKING ATTACK 2 - 3 1 BASHING ATTACK
BASHING ATTACK 5 - 8 1 PARRY-STRIKE
TOTAL PARRY 3 - 5 1 AIMED BLOW
PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 - 0 1 SLASHING ATTACK
1 STRIKING ATTACK
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE
FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME
LUNGING ATTACK BARROCH 18-2684 87 87 1 289 SHEPHERDS (432)
WALL OF STEEL WHIRLING DOG 10-4177 59 29 1 249 MONGREL HORDE (964)
PARRY-LUNGE LEE AT TOURNEY 4-3565 104 117 1 245 LETHAL LADIES (768)
BASHING ATTACK BUUL THE BULL 2-4840 36 37 1 225 RESURRECTION (1143)
AIMED BLOW LARGE SPINNY GUY 23-4361 51 29 2 224 DIABLO TOO (1037)
STRIKING ATTACK MAHI MAHI 18-4899 82 59 1 220 BIG MEAN FISH (292)
TOTAL PARRY VOLDRIC THE BLUE 18-6259 58 44 0 218 THUNDR + LITENING (309)
SLASHING ATTACK COOLER 82-7277 27 12 1 208 STYROFOAM (1090)
PARRY-STRIKE SHOCKING TOAD 7-310 47 60 1 200 NINJAS (1107)
The overall popularity leader is LEE AT TOURNEY 4-3565. The most popular warrior
this turn was TORNADO 6-2249. The ten other most popular fighters were FLOATING
SWISS 4-4461, LIFE 3-4196, MAGINOT MIKE 4-4509, OH WELL 10-2205, VOLDRIC THE BLUE
18-6259, BLINKY 18-2683, SUE E. SYDE 39-3240, DOC STEELE 18-6808, HOCKEY 82-5719, and
OBSESSIVE 58-2447.
The least popular fighter this week was ETCHED IN STONE 61-3112. The other ten least
popular fighters were HUGE TWIRLING MAN 24-4457, HOT 48-3858, A NEW PONY! 82-1306,
HARLEQUIN TUSKFISH 18-6977, SPLURGE ON WAX LIPS 18-6485, SEX ON THE BEACH 54-2435,
SHINY PENNY 32-3789, EXCREMENTO 51-4968, SILAS 18-6796, and SLEEPLESS PARANOIA
82-2252.
Arena (Number) W L K Arena (Number) W L K Arena (Number) W L K
NIANIA(2) 1 0 0 TI(23) 1 1 0 RODEKI(42) 4 1 0
OSKSI(3) 0 1 0 ZORPUNT(24) 1 3 0 CAER(48) 1 1 0
JHELUM(4) 2 2 0 LYRATILAN(25) 1 0 0 TRICORUS(51) 2 1 0
KALTOS(5) 0 1 0 ARVAT(32) 0 1 0 TROCAR(54) 0 1 0
TRANSEL(6) 2 6 0 JHANS(36) 1 0 0 ANDOR(57) 1 0 0
BONSUR(7) 2 1 0 SIBIKHAS(37) 1 1 0 DELARQ TOR(58) 2 2 0
KOLACT(10) 3 5 0 CLIFFHOME(38) 1 1 0 JURINE(61) 1 0 0
TALCAMA(18) 11 5 0 XOCHITHLAN(39) 2 1 0 DWES EG(82) 3 9 0
SUNSET(21) 0 1 0 KATI-TEI(41) 1 0 0 SHADOW GROVE(97) 1 0 0
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
BUUL THE BULL 2-4840 36 37 1 225 RESURRECTION (1143) NIANIA
LIFE 3-4196 34 120 0 125 GAMES LIBRARY (998) OSKSI
LEE AT TOURNEY 4-3565 104 117 1 245 LETHAL LADIES (768) JHELUM
BASS 5-3666 48 83 2 180 JOHNS (927) KALTOS
SCHYLER 6-4866 48 80 1 202 THE LADY'S LIST (917) TRANSEL
SHOCKING TOAD 7-310 47 60 1 200 NINJAS (1107) BONSUR
WHIRLING DOG 10-4177 59 29 1 249 MONGREL HORDE (964) KOLACT
BARROCH 18-2684 87 87 1 289 SHEPHERDS (432) TALCAMA
TYRONE 21-1769 29 21 1 56 DWARVEN LEGION (1139) SUNSET
LARGE SPINNY GUY 23-4361 51 29 2 224 DIABLO TOO (1037) TI
MR PIBB 24-4253 51 20 1 187 DP CLONES (1045) ZORPUNT
WENT TO MARKET 25-4288 15 9 2 65 THIS LITTLE PRIGGY (1162) LYRATILAN
SHINY PENNY 32-3789 28 59 2 140 FOUND IN THE SAND (1034) ARVAT
MISS HONEY 36-4850 60 51 0 250 SCARRY TEAM (824) JHANS
BLACK WIDOW 37-1303 51 59 2 192 BEAST MASTERS (136) SIBIKHAS
FACEMAN 38-4129 39 35 2 195 THE A TEAM (1044) CLIFFHOME
SUE E. SYDE 39-3240 36 27 1 189 CRIMINAL ELEMENT (1074) XOCHITHLAN
GREE CHAK 41-3859 37 25 2 183 KILLERS (1145) KATI-TEI
FAT BASTARD 42-3804 46 21 0 219 I'M SO SEXY (1072) RODEKI
WHIRLING WORD 48-3815 49 31 0 214 4-LETTER WORDS (1063) CAER
CHRISTIANITY 51-4965 37 32 0 184 GENOCIDE (1110) TRICORUS
SEX ON THE BEACH 54-2435 18 7 3 38 INDULGENT DRINKS (1153) TROCAR
DR DAZZLE 57-4485 42 25 0 216 PEPPER PRACTICE II (1069) ANDOR
SPEEDI 58-3029 90 76 3 301 SHAMROCKS (424) DELARQ TOR
ETCHED IN STONE 61-3112 30 11 0 191 CEMENTIA (1112) JURINE
COOLER 82-7277 27 12 1 208 STYROFOAM (1090) DWES EG
BRAHMA 97-731 26 28 4 205 ONE SURFING HINDU (1071) SHADOW GROVE
NEW GRADUATES--FROM ALL ARENAS (INCLUDING CLOSED ARENAS)
For those of you who keep track of such things, 18 additional warriors graduated
from regular DM arenas (including closed arenas) since the last tournament:
CAFFEINE JUNKIE (3-6110) ADDICTED
CATFISH HUNTER (5-3315) PARTY ANIMALS
MATTAHOOPLE (16-4203) GIFTED GODS
SWEET JANE (53-6535) THE DARK TEMPLE
LIL NOIR (62-3311) ENIGMA
NARCISSISTIC NUN (69-8644) ODD SQUAD
LEGION '8' (71-2369) D.O.A.
RAW SEX APPEAL (82-1331) WHY WE LOVE TUM
ZOMBIE STOMP (82-2617) NO MORE TEARS
VIOLENT VOLE (82-4565) MAMMAL MILITIA
LADY OF THE MOON (82-5481) HARM NONE
KAMIKAZI GNAT (82-6073) DEADLY ATTACKS II
THE 13TH WARRIOR (82-6346) STOOPID MOVIES
SIRTON (82-9190) I AM SUCK
DUNE (82-10414) 4-LETTER EPICS
FLEM (82-12614) 4-LETTER FLUIDS
GREENHOUSE EFFECT (82-12996) GLOBAL WARMING
UGLY (82-14501) 4-LETTER DESCRIPTION
-- Green Eyes