DARKHOLM SPORTING JOURNAL

Date   : 10/04/2003    Duedate: 10/17/2003

DARKHOLM

DM-104    TURN-359

RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %  RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %
  1 THUNDR + LITE 18/309 1127  420  7 72.9      TROOPERS 21/1113                      
  2-TOTEM 74/1146          47   22  2 68.1   10 NIGHT TRAIN 37/545      7    7  0 50.0
    THAT SUCKS! 19/1144                         NIGHT TRAIN 6/1158                    
    DEATH STUDS VIII 82/1086                 11 THE A TEAM 38/1044    569  572  6 49.9
  3 MONGREL HORDE 10/964  480  232  3 67.4      BIG MEAN FISH 18/292                  
  4 BELLYFLOP 82/1097    1402 1138 14 55.2      GUANO GROUP 51/1065                   
    STREET PIZZAD I 82/1096                     ONE SURFING HINDU 97/1071             
    WHY I PLAY DM 82/1116                       FURNITURE BARN 42/1109                
    WHAT I ATE FOR XMAS 82/1114                 LOOK OUT BELOW 6/1042                 
    MY WIFE'S COSMETICS 82/1038              12 SHAMROCKS 58/424      153  161  3 48.7
    CHEAP DENTISTRY 82/1098                  13 THE MENTORS 10/408     28   35  0 44.4
    STREET PIZZA 18/114                      14 BEAST MASTERS 37/136   91  130  1 41.2
    4-LETTER WORDS 48/1063                      ELEMENTS OF PSI 58/423                
    SESAME SPINE 82/1070                        ACTS OF NATURE 6/415                  
    PARENTHOOD 82/1122                       15 CRIMINAL ELE 39/1074   17   26  0 39.5
    ROCK BOTTOM 82/1080                         INDULGENT DRINKS 54/1153              
    FASCINATIN' RYTHYM 82/1152               16 NINJAS 7/1107          32   54  1 37.2
  5 STYROFOAM 82/1090    1115  966  8 53.6      RESURRECTION 2/1143                   
  6-EXODUS! 3/956         430  375  3 53.4      GENOCIDE 51/1110                      
    SPIDERS FROM MARS 21/950                    KILLERS 41/1145                       
    THE TAO 36/923                           17 DELVERS 42/1000       191  326  1 36.9
    THE DARK TEMPLE 18/978                      DOGS OF WAR 4/999                     
    FIANADHA 69/945                             GAMES LIBRARY 3/998                   
  7 DOH! 24/1147         1446 1279  6 53.1   18 JOHNS 5/927           731 1284 16 36.3
    THINGSINPUG'SCOOLER 4/1088                  SCARRY TEAM 36/824                    
    DP CLONES 24/1045                           ARROGANCE 18/732                      
    WASTELAND 18/468                            JUST BECAUSE 38/1151                  
    PEPPER PRACTICE II 57/1069                  THE LADY'S LIST 6/917                 
    I'M SO SEXY 42/1072                         LETHAL LADIES 4/768                   
    DIABLO TOO 23/1037                       19 BIG BAD 7/1073        425  794  8 34.9
    WASTELAND II 7/500                          SHEPHERDS 18/432                      
    OUTSIDE IS 48/1061                          THIS LITTLE PRIGGY 25/1162            
    COOL WHEELS 58/943                          SUPER BASH BROTHERS 6/1067            
    BAD HAND 24/1125                            NEXT GENERATION 58/1075               
    CEMENTIA 61/1112                            NEXT GENERATION 18/1150               
    DIABLO ALSO 24/1163                         FOUND IN THE SAND 32/1034             
  8 QUBIT 10/1140         523  466  2 52.9      MIGHTY MORALS 51/1120                 
    ON A WHIM 82/1014                        20 DWARVEN LEGI 21/1139    3    6  0 33.3
    SIR AGLIO 10/600                         21 TOWNSVILLAIN 10/1089   10   23  0 30.3
  9-DEAD EVIL 18/627       27   25  2 51.9

    '##/###' Avoid teams by their Team Id     '-'  Team did not fight this turn

                                  WARRIOR SPOTLIGHT

          + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ Eye of the Storm #65 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +

In the Far West:

     The ship approaching them was running on oars; it had no mast that they could
see, but two banks of oars dipped and rose in practiced unison, glittering as
sunlight hit the water falling from the blades.  It was considerably longer than the
gladiators' vessel, and narrower in proportion, but there was still room on that lean
deck for a cluster of armed men.  It was headed straight for them, picking up speed
as it came.
     Vurand cursed.  "That's no pirate," the Orc said, turning to run toward the
stern of the ship.  "That's a damned warship, and it's going to ram us!"
     Ashon Chang and Werre had also seen the approaching ship, and Chang was running
toward the bow; he passed Vurand half way.  "Not enough wind to avoid them," he said
in passing.
     Jammies looked both ways, uncertain what it would be best to do, and decided to
wait for orders from someone more knowledgeable.
     Reaching Herlas and Rughal, who were glaring at each other near the bow, Ashon
Chang said, "We are about to be rammed by a warship.  Can either of you do anything
about it?"
     Both men jerked and looked toward the approaching vessel.
     "I can do little with the Arcanum in this state," Herlas said, "and nothing with
that barbarian watching me--"
     Rughal, who looked as though he hadn't eaten or slept since Shania disappeared,
glared at him suspiciously.  "What did you have in mind?"
     "I might be able to do something with...oh, fog, maybe, and wind," the Fratsfan
said thoughtfully.  "Weather is easily influenced, being naturally so unstable.  But
we could as well crash into those rocks ourselves, running blind," he added.
     Rughal glanced at the rocks, which were tall chimneys and small islands rising
straight out of the sea, then at the approaching warship.  "A fog to hide both us and
that other ship," he said, "and on a count of ten after the fog appears, a strong
wind at an angle to take us through that gap."  He indicated a passage between two
islands with a tilt of his head, not wanting to point and be seen from the attacking
ship.  "Ashon, tell Werre.  On the count of ten after the fog, change course--"
     "To pass between those two islands, which we won't see until we're right on
them, but you're correct, it's a chance worth taking."  The samurai turned and raced
back to the stern.
     "I don't know if I'll have the strength to hold the fog and especially the wind
for long," Herlas warned.  "I don't want to be rammed or captured, but my power has
limits."
     Rughal bared his teeth in a hard grin.  "I'll help you."
     "But--!"
     "Or stop you.  Your choice."
     Herlas said something under his breath.  It might have been swearing.  He put
his hands over his face for a moment, then straightened up and glanced at Rughal.
"Very well.  I begin."
     It began with a little haze, just the thinnest veil of sun-gilded mist.  Nothing
to cause the most wary of mariners any concern.  Rughal could see sweat forming on
Herlas' face and decided that it was time to join in.  He gripped the Fratsfan's
shoulders, focused his mind and hiu, and visualized himself as a wall at the man's
back, bracing him in the effort he was making.
     Herlas responded immediately.  The mist shimmered and suddenly turned to a heavy
fog.  Rughal began counting out loud while the wizard groped for the reins of the
wind.  The ship wallowed underfoot as the wind that had been driving it faltered,
then quickened again as the count reached ten.
                       ***     *****     ***     *****     ***
     Shania Silverstar stared at the stone for several minutes.  It was...no longer a
thing of power.  No longer the Eye of the West.  Dull-surfaced, lightless, dead.  She
set it gently back in the niche these people had appointed for it.  As soon as her
hands lifted from the stone, a faint crazing ran over the surface, deepened, and
suddenly the stone collapsed into a pile of dust.
     "Well, that is one question answered," she murmured.  "I won't have to tell the
people here that the stone is dead.  They'll be able to see for them--"
     She turned at a cry of alarm and fury from the doorway.
     The man, the priest, who had spoken to her before stood there, staring.  "Woman,
what have you done?" he demanded.
     Shania raised an eyebrow.  "I have absorbed the essence of the stone," she said
coolly.  "I am now...the Eye of the West."
     "No!  That's impossible!"
     "It's the truth."  It seemed likely that he would attack her in his shock and
rage, and she readied herself to defend.  She was a mage of no small ability, though
her power was currently much below normal, and the arena had trained her to use her
hands as weapons.  She was aware, also, that with the power from the stone had come
certain abilities--there was no time to explore the possibilities, but some of them
were bound to be useful in combat.  If this fool thought she was defenseless, he
would be surprised.  Very surprised.
     The man rushed at her and grabbed the front of her shift, presumably to shake
her.  She swept up one arm to block and break away his grip, chopped into the side of
his neck with the edge of her hand, and as he began to fall away, snapped a kick into
his side.  His collapse was gratifying, but there was no time to stand around and
admire her handiwork.  He had no sword but did carry a dagger, which she
appropriated.  An obsidian blade and a gold-inlaid handle.  Probably ceremonial.
Well, it would still kill at need, no doubt.  She took his outer robe, as well,
because it had a hood that would conceal her pale hair; she had a suspicion that
these people were all or mostly dark.
     By the time she'd gotten the robe off him, he was beginning to twitch.  Shania
looked at him thoughtfully, then hit him again on the side of the head behind his
ear, using the butt of his dagger.  He subsided.  She briefly contemplated tearing
his undergarment into strips and bind him, but it would take too long.  She had to be
away from here NOW, before the other priests--there were bound to be others--showed
up to assist at the sacrifice.
     She tucked the dagger into the sleeve of her borrowed robe, where it would be
instantly available at need, and opened the door.

          + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ The Tides of Magic #13 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +

Not Lirin Kiv:

     The carriage moved through the streets slowly, as though the driver was feeling
his way in the fog.  The fog wasn't heavy enough to justify that kind of groping
progress, but Shylock kept quiet.  No point in berating the driver.  Besides, the
Lord Protector was also making full use of the chance to stare around.  So was
Clemenda, he noted, well, that was okay, too.  He didn't normally like people around
him to be TOO alert, but in this peculiar situation, no telling what might be
significant and who might notice it first.
     The temple to Somebody Who Wasn't Mantor vanished behind them.  Shylock counted
turns and blocks of buildings and finally set his teeth against possible disaster and
looked toward where the arena should have been.  Hmm.  Not the same structure, but
there were points of similarity.
     It might be an arena.
     He could hope so.  There were things about the gladiatorial system on the Isle
and off it that he didn't like, that he KNEW he could have arranged better, but at
least it would provide a point of contact where he and whoever lived in this world
could begin to understand each other.  And understanding--up to a point--was
important.  It was the first step to power and control.  And power and control were
essential; without them, a man was a mere puppet in the hands of others...such as
Sheila Greywand.  If this world had no Sheila Greywand...the possibilities were
enticing.  He might decide to stay here.
     But first, he had to establish contacts.
     Shylock stepped down from the carriage and turned to give Clemenda a hand.  Not
that she needed help, but it made a good appearance.  And so did she.  Her clothing
was more restrained than an Adantri would wear, but she looked good in it.  She would
also look good out of it....  He suppressed that thought sternly.  Not now.  Right
now, he needed to meet people and find out where they were, why, and what, if
anything, could be done about it.
                       ***     *****     ***     *****     ***
     It was an arena, more or less.  But the warriors who competed here, Shylock
decided, could not reasonably be called "gladiators."  At least, Master Dan Shao, who
was approximately the arenamaster, rejected that term vigorously and with many
scornful comments about the "depravity of the Thallians, with their lust to see the
blood of others."
     "We are Champions," Dan Shao said sternly.  "Every member of this community is a
champion of his city and style.  We fight here as an offering to the great god
Mantor, and to further the development of our various styles."
     Shylock nodded.  Basically, that was the attitude that many of the warriors in
Lirin Kiv took, although the system itself didn't support such a position.  He
sometimes wondered how Lirith Kai had come to allow the arenas into its cities, since
the philosophy behind them was so alien to the native culture.  No doubt Sheila
Greywand had brought pressure to bear on the Emperor.  He'd heard she did things like
that, and he could believe it.  Sheila Greywand was definitely someone who understood
power and enjoyed using it.  That, too, was something to pursue at another time.  For
now....
     "I don't understand how you got here," Dan Shao said, scowling suspiciously.
"Magic, I suppose."  His voice became deeply disapproving.
     "I suppose it must have been," Shylock agreed.  "But it wasn't OUR magic.  We
had simply set out for dinner in a neighboring town, and the world as we knew it
vanished, leaving us here."
     "Some kind of interdimensional gate."  The arenamaster's disapproval deepened.
"What do you propose to do about it?"
     "In what sense?" Shylock asked cautiously.
     "An unregistered gate is a Bad Thing!" Dan Shao thundered.  "You, as the people
most closely connected with it, have the responsibility of closing it.  Best to waste
no time about it, either."
     "With us on the other side, I suppose," the gladiator grumbled.
     "Well..." Dan Shao looked at Clemenda appreciatively, "that isn't essential.
It's the gate itself that matters."

                                 THE GUARDIAN'S FORUM
                      Reflections by the Keeper of the Runeblade

Assur, in his blindness, failed to tell me that I needed to actually write a column
when I acquired the Runeblade from Mahi Mahi.  Mahi Mahi was a fool to tell his
secret of success to us all.  He should have known better for I am older even than
him (and his secret was that he was older than dirt).

It was a good fight, though, with both of us hitting the other and having a good old
fashioned all out battle.  He hit me 3 times while I hit him twice.  My armor, no
doubt, helped me withstand his blows.  He decided to go without protection and that
might have been the difference in the fight.

Last turn, I faced Dr Nut, who gave me a chance to practice some of the offensive
moves I've been learning.  My real hope is to be able next turn to face Voldric
again.  I'm also looking towards retiring with a winning record!

I give my challenge to Dusky Jawfish, who clearly deserves a chance to be shown what
a Grand Challenger Champion should look like on the sands, having earned the position
himself.  Plus, Big Wave Dave runs Dusky and of all the IT alliance members, Big Wave
Dave is clearly the most fishy.  AND BWD plays dirty Old Maid (at least Assur says
so).

See you next turn!

-- Barroch, the warrior who TV'd Eligibles without even an Advanced Master in Defense
or Parry....

                             REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER

Good morning, warriors of the Federation!

     Life was most challenged.  JOB (18-6129) (19-121-0,120) of SHEPHERDS challenged
LIFE (3-4196) (34-119-0,135) of GAMES LIBRARY.  JOB narrowly defeated LIFE in a
popular 6 minute bloody Challenge brawl.  Oh my, look at those records!  No wonder it
was a close one.  As the warriors limped from the arena, Life was heard to remark,
"...during the ENTIRE fight he had his buttons open and there were PLAID shorts but
it reminded me that I STILL have not received my SUPERIOR gender attachment which
would come with BLACK SILK shorts and I think they should POST someone at the gate to
make sure EVERY warrior's fly is done up before they are ALLOWED to step out..."  I'd
like to take this opportunity to enquire of all the local barmaids:  who would like
to sign up for fly detail?
     Shepherds (19th in today's listings) were most avoided by DP Clones (7th), who
perhaps did not want to encounter any plaid shorts.  Really Assur, you might want to
issue them all a nice understated blue...although a warrior of Job's long history is
surely entitled to wear whatever he wants.
     The Commission granted but one TV challenge, which was for the title:  BARROCH
(18-2684) (86-87-1,274) of SHEPHERDS TV challenged DUSKY JAWFISH (18-6978) (37-33-
1,211) of BIG MEAN FISH.  BARROCH devastated DUSKY JAWFISH in a 1 minute mismatched
Challenge Title fight.  You can see that Barroch is approaching the winning record
that he desires, helped along in his quest by the column that he remembered to write.
And the man he wants to fight, Voldric the Blue, is now in range!  VOLDRIC THE BLUE
(18-6259) (57-44-0,210) of THUNDR + LITENING fought OBSESSIVE (58-2447) (38-33-1,187)
of ELEMENTS OF PSI.  VOLDRIC THE BLUE viciously subdued OBSESSIVE in a crowd pleasing
4 minute fight.  So we're looking forward to seeing that battle next turn.  This will
be a lunger vs. TP fight giving Voldric perhaps a slight advantage, though not as
much as back in the basic arenas.  At least we may hope the fight will be long enough
that if you blink, you won't miss it.
     Oh no, Sex on the Beach is back in the bottom spot even after making what looked
like a wise challenge to begin climbing the list!  SEX ON THE BEACH (54-2435) (18-6-
3,44) of INDULGENT DRINKS challenged WENT TO MARKET (25-4288) (14-9-2,50) of THIS
LITTLE PRIGGY.  SEX ON THE BEACH was devastated by WENT TO MARKET in a 1 minute
Challenge brawl.  Still it was a good try and I'm sure Sex will get up out of the
cellar before long.
     No one died.  I can't tell you how much it distresses me that warriors in
Darkholm are so seldom killed.  It means you aren't trying hard enough!  Come on,
what are you afraid of?  It's not permanent!
     As usual, Lee at Tourney is our most popular warrior.  A woman, no less!  I do
miss Hansel.  She won her fight though, always a bit of a surprise in a popularity
leader.  SILAS (18-6796) (32-55-2,183) of SHEPHERDS challenged LEE AT TOURNEY (4-
3565) (103-117-1,238) of LETHAL LADIES.  SILAS was demolished by LEE AT TOURNEY in a
1 minute one-sided Challenge melee.  Lee actually made it into the stylemasters.
Well done!
     And the most popular warrior this turn, the one the rabble perceived as being
scummed, was Tornado.  TORNADO (6-2249) (24-30-2,168) of ACTS OF NATURE fought
MAGINOT MIKE (4-4509) (50-52-1,112) of DOGS OF WAR.  TORNADO savagely defeated
MAGINOT MIKE in an action packed 6 minute bloody competition.  I can't quite see how
anyone would mistake that fight for a scumfest.
     Now if you want to talk scumfest...ETCHED IN STONE (61-3112) (29-11-0,181) of
CEMENTIA challenged A DIFFERENT GRAPE (82-1258) (30-16-0,183) of MY WIFE'S COSMETICS.
ETCHED IN STONE outwaited A DIFFERENT GRAPE in an unpopular 27 minute Challenge
brawl.  Etched is our least favored warrior this turn, and I can't understand why A
Different Grape didn't make the unpopularity list as well.  It takes two to scum for
half an hour!
     I have been wondering where all our Tournament Victors have gone.  Surely the
Federation produces the most dangerous warriors in all the known world.  I suppose
most of them are in Primus or beyond...but isn't there a new crop coming up?  Does
anyone know?  Because getting regularly outdone by Free Blades is quite unacceptable.
If anyone knows a Tournament Victor who belongs is Darkholm and isn't fighting here,
or isn't fighting at all, go kick them in the butt and tell them to get over here!

                                                                    Desiree

KEEPER OF THE RUNEBLADE       W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 BARROCH 18-2684             87  87  1  289  SHEPHERDS (432)            TALCAMA

GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS    W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 SPEEDI 58-3029              90  76  3  301  SHAMROCKS (424)            DELARQ TOR
 MISS HONEY 36-4850          60  51  0  250  SCARRY TEAM (824)          JHANS
 WHIRLING DOG 10-4177        59  29  1  249  MONGREL HORDE (964)        KOLACT
 LEE AT TOURNEY 4-3565      104 117  1  245  LETHAL LADIES (768)        JHELUM
 BUUL THE BULL 2-4840        36  37  1  225  RESURRECTION (1143)        NIANIA
-BUNNY WAILER 3-5356         32  19  0  225  EXODUS! (956)              OSKSI
 LARGE SPINNY GUY 23-4361    51  29  2  224  DIABLO TOO (1037)          TI
-SYPHILIS 19-3085            84  48  2  223  THAT SUCKS! (1144)         ZUWAYZA
 MAHI MAHI 18-4899           82  59  1  220  BIG MEAN FISH (292)        TALCAMA
 FAT BASTARD 42-3804         46  21  0  219  I'M SO SEXY (1072)         RODEKI
 VOLDRIC THE BLUE 18-6259    58  44  0  218  THUNDR + LITENING (309)    TALCAMA
 SLAYER II 10-2125           34  24  1  218  THE MENTORS (408)          KOLACT
 DR DAZZLE 57-4485           42  25  0  216  PEPPER PRACTICE II (1069)  ANDOR
-MAJOR TOM 21-4598           40  31  1  215  SPIDERS FROM MARS (950)    SUNSET
 WHIRLING WORD 48-3815       49  31  0  214  4-LETTER WORDS (1063)      CAER

GRAND CHAMPIONS               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 CLEANER WRASSE 18-6495      58  56  2  208  BIG MEAN FISH (292)        TALCAMA
 RYGEL 18-7142               38  27  0  208  WASTELAND (468)            TALCAMA
 COOLER 82-7277              27  12  1  208  STYROFOAM (1090)           DWES EG
 MUCKER 42-3596              47  53  1  207  DELVERS (1000)             RODEKI
-DIERDRE 69-9439             37  36  1  205  FIANADHA (945)             CIMMERIAC
 BRAHMA 97-731               26  28  4  205  ONE SURFING HINDU (1071)   SHADOW GROVE
-T-BONE 18-3402              32  22  3  204  DEAD EVIL (627)            TALCAMA
 SCHYLER 6-4866              48  80  1  202  THE LADY'S LIST (917)      TRANSEL
-STORM XCIX 82-14095         20   6  1  202  DEATH STUDS VIII (1086)    DWES EG
-LADY STARDUST 21-4601       46  21  2  201  SPIDERS FROM MARS (950)    SUNSET
 SHOCKING TOAD 7-310         47  60  1  200  NINJAS (1107)              BONSUR
 JACK BOY 82-2030            64  50  0  199  ON A WHIM (1014)           DWES EG
-TRANQUILITY 36-3765         47  37  3  199  THE TAO (923)              JHANS
 OSCAR THE SLOUCH 82-1316    38  29  3  199  SESAME SPINE (1070)        DWES EG
 DARK GUMBY 7-4694           41  27  0  198  WASTELAND II (500)         BONSUR
 NO SALARY CAP 82-6494       19   6  1  197  WHY I PLAY DM (1116)       DWES EG
 GEO METRO 58-5740           59  61  2  196  COOL WHEELS (943)          DELARQ TOR
 FACEMAN 38-4129             39  35  2  195  THE A TEAM (1044)          CLIFFHOME
 CHICK WITH A STICK 23-4365  40  40  1  193  DIABLO TOO (1037)          TI
 SIR ENE 10-4360             39  25  3  193  SIR AGLIO (600)            KOLACT
 BLACK WIDOW 37-1303         51  59  2  192  BEAST MASTERS (136)        SIBIKHAS
 OBSESSIVE 58-2447           38  34  1  192  ELEMENTS OF PSI (423)      DELARQ TOR
 ETCHED IN STONE 61-3112     30  11  0  191  CEMENTIA (1112)            JURINE
 FLOATING SWISS 4-4461       21  13  0  191  THINGSINPUG'SCOOLER (1088) JHELUM
 BLINKY 18-2683              72 114  4  190  SHEPHERDS (432)            TALCAMA
 DUSKY JAWFISH 18-6978       37  34  1  190  BIG MEAN FISH (292)        TALCAMA
 SUE E. SYDE 39-3240         36  27  1  189  CRIMINAL ELEMENT (1074)    XOCHITHLAN
 SPLURGE ON WAX LIP 18-6485  49  37  1  188  STREET PIZZA (114)         TALCAMA
 MR PIBB 24-4253             51  20  1  187  DP CLONES (1045)           ZORPUNT
-BODHISATVA 36-4027          35  25  0  187  THE TAO (923)              JHANS
 JANET RENO 42-3823          33  32  1  187  I'M SO SEXY (1072)         RODEKI
-GRIZZLY 74-2710             41  41  0  185  TOTEM (1146)               DAIYLA KIV
 3-7-2-D-S 82-5727           33  27  0  185  FASCINATIN' RYTHYM (1152)  DWES EG
 CHRISTIANITY 51-4965        37  32  0  184  GENOCIDE (1110)            TRICORUS
 ZALTAN 6-4616               54 106  2  183  THE LADY'S LIST (917)      TRANSEL
 GREE CHAK 41-3859           37  25  2  183  KILLERS (1145)             KATI-TEI
 DRUNK AND AT DENNY 82-2255  34  33  2  183  ROCK BOTTOM (1080)         DWES EG
 A DIFFERENT GRAPE 82-1258   30  17  0  182  MY WIFE'S COSMETICS (1038) DWES EG
-SID VICIOUS 18-6054         30  23  2  181  THE DARK TEMPLE (978)      TALCAMA

GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS       W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 BASS 5-3666                 48  83  2  180  JOHNS (927)                KALTOS

GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS       W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 DR NUT 24-4254              42  25  2  179  DP CLONES (1045)           ZORPUNT
 LUCRETIA BORGIA 4-3563      91 130  0  178  LETHAL LADIES (768)        JHELUM
 HOT 48-3858                 39  39  2  178  OUTSIDE IS (1061)          CAER
 SILAS 18-6796               32  56  2  177  SHEPHERDS (432)            TALCAMA
-SMILES 21-3207              25  16  3  177  TROOPERS (1113)            SUNSET
 OH WELL 10-2205             26  23  4  176  THE MENTORS (408)          KOLACT
 HARLEQUIN TUSKFISH 18-6977  38  32  0  173  BIG MEAN FISH (292)        TALCAMA
 BIGFATHAIRYDEAL 82-1321     20   7  1  172  STREET PIZZAD I (1096)     DWES EG
 SINISTER MIDGET 6-5113      35  41  5  170  LOOK OUT BELOW (1042)      TRANSEL
 TORNADO 6-2249              25  30  2  170  ACTS OF NATURE (415)       TRANSEL
 TOLAIS DEEPHEART 42-1620    79  92  0  167  DELVERS (1000)             RODEKI
 DOC STEELE 18-6808          38  52  1  167  ARROGANCE (732)            TALCAMA
 MOJO JOJO 10-4643           26  26  2  163  TOWNSVILLAINS (1089)       KOLACT
 DAVID CARUSO 82-2269        18   8  1  162  BELLYFLOP (1097)           DWES EG
 A NEW PONY! 82-1306         16  15  0  162  WHAT I ATE FOR XMAS (1114) DWES EG
 LUIGI 6-5142                28  31  2  160  SUPER BASH BROTHERS (1067) TRANSEL
 EXCREMENTO 51-4968          38  32  1  153  GUANO GROUP (1065)         TRICORUS
 DOC STEELE 18-6010          48 100  6  152  ARROGANCE (732)            TALCAMA

GRAND ADEPTS                  W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 SHINY PENNY 32-3789         28  59  2  140  FOUND IN THE SAND (1034)   ARVAT
 JOB 18-6129                 20 121  0  136  SHEPHERDS (432)            TALCAMA
-THE HUNGER 21-4622          19   7  1  136  SPIDERS FROM MARS (950)    SUNSET
 BEAR 7-4628                 24  32  1  132  BIG BAD (1073)             BONSUR
 LINK 6-5144                 25  32  2  129  SUPER BASH BROTHERS (1067) TRANSEL
 THANOS 37-1406              24  28  2  129  NIGHT TRAIN (545)          SIBIKHAS
 LIFE 3-4196                 34 120  0  125  GAMES LIBRARY (998)        OSKSI
 MAGINOT MIKE 4-4509         50  53  1  124  DOGS OF WAR (999)          JHELUM
 SLEEPLESS PARANOIA 82-2252  12  13  1  108  PARENTHOOD (1122)          DWES EG
 HOCKEY 82-5719              16  15  0  102  CHEAP DENTISTRY (1098)     DWES EG

GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES    W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 ROB A. REE 39-3241          28  15  0  100  CRIMINAL ELEMENT (1074)    XOCHITHLAN
 THE WICKER KING 42-3904     20  17  0  100  FURNITURE BARN (1109)      RODEKI
 ELI 18-7272                 19  23  3  100  SHEPHERDS (432)            TALCAMA
 MIMIC BLENNY 18-7541        22  12  1   95  BIG MEAN FISH (292)        TALCAMA

GRAND INITIATES               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 LUC STARWALKER 58-6100      26  30  0   88  NEXT GENERATION (1075)     DELARQ TOR
 SLAYER 3 10-2530            23  10  1   87  THE MENTORS (408)          KOLACT
 QUID PRO QUO 10-4794        24   7  1   75  QUBIT (1140)               KOLACT
 PATIENCE 51-4949            18  27  1   74  MIGHTY MORALS (1120)       TRICORUS
 TRUMP 24-4359               25  19  1   73  BAD HAND (1125)            ZORPUNT
 ARSONIST ART 39-3325        22  15  0   73  CRIMINAL ELEMENT (1074)    XOCHITHLAN
 NUMBERED WON 18-7434        17  19  0   71  NEXT GENERATION (1150)     TALCAMA
 PROFFESSOR GRIM 10-2613     16  11  0   66  THE MENTORS (408)          KOLACT
 WENT TO MARKET 25-4288      15   9  2   65  THIS LITTLE PRIGGY (1162)  LYRATILAN
 ZOT ZIPZIG 6-5688           15  13  0   63  NIGHT TRAIN (1158)         TRANSEL
 BRADEN 6-4867               46  82  0   56  THE LADY'S LIST (917)      TRANSEL
 TYRONE 21-1769              29  21  1   56  DWARVEN LEGION (1139)      SUNSET
-JOHN ASHCROFT 24-4355       16   9  2   53  DOH! (1147)                ZORPUNT
 HUGE TWIRLING MAN 24-4457   17   6  0   52  DIABLO ALSO (1163)         ZORPUNT
 MEN WORKING 38-4189         24  36  1   50  JUST BECAUSE (1151)        CLIFFHOME
-QUEUE 18-7756               15   4  1   50  NEXT GENERATION (1150)     TALCAMA
 SEX ON THE BEACH 54-2435    18   7  3   38  INDULGENT DRINKS (1153)    TROCAR

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                    W   L  K TEAM NAME              SLAIN BY              TURN

                               PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE

Desiree -- Gosh, sorry to confuse you!  I guess your head must be just, you know,
totally full of the brown hair that makes you artificially intelligent, huh?  But
this cute hotdog vender with a great tan was, like, tickling me while I wrote that.
It should have been eight TV challenges.  There were more challenges that weren't TV.
Probably just radio, but that's okay.  You can take a radio to the beach, but not a
TV.  And anyway, the tan you get from a TV is not as good as a totally natural tan.
-- Debby Tonte

It is a good turn when one of your warriors gets skill #119!  It is even better when
two do it! -- Assur

Tolais -- Assur wants me in the arena!  I'd much rather be tending the sheep!  Yet it
seems the gap between us is closing! -- Silas

Life of Osksi -- I've been trying to challenge, but one or both of us all seems to
get interference!  Perhaps this turn!  Looking forward to continuing our historic
bouts.  You've been the victor every time so far, but I continue to improve and one
day, perhaps, I will even beat you and return to you the honor of being the single
worst warrior on the sands!  Until then, though, you'll have to settle for second
worst!  Certainly, it will be a long day before another equals our mediocrity!
Survival alone, is no easy feat.  The best today are:
     Duff of Illis, with 65 losses to his credit!
     Dumb, Dumb of Iaye, with 48 losses to his credit!
Wow, Duff is within a year of taking your loss record away (if he loses every one)!
-- Job of Talcama

Mucker -- So, have you fixed your problem yet?  Inquiring minds want to know! --
Blinky

Desiree -- Please forgive Debby Tonte, a blonde can not be expected to get her facts
correct all the time.  We had more than eight challenges in Free Blades the turn in
question.  Debby forgot to put the qualifier, TV, in between the word eight and the
word challenges.  It should have read, "We had sixty-two fights and eight TV
challenge matches this week."  There were actually a total of twenty-eight challenge
matches for the turn. -- Rillion

Silas -- Will next time be my turn again? -- Tolais Deepheart

Miss Honey -- You can be as rude as you want, sweet thing, and I won't even notice.
-- Mucker

Sid Vicious -- I don't know if there's any chance of getting Desiree to do Life's
personal again.... -- Nick

The Wicker King -- Yay!  (jumping up and down)  Did you see that?  "My skill at
arms," it says.  And I attacked a lot.  Pretty good, huh? -- Maginot Mike
P.S.  Wicker armor doesn't do it.  Just a hint.

Desiree -- "Too intellectual?"  You say that of ME?  You DARE to imply that *I*, Life
of Osksi, a perfectly created golem, might lack intellect? -- Life of Osksi
P.S.  So you dye your hair brown, this makes you SMART?  As if!

Hmm, I didn't realize Life could channel Debby Tonte. -- Nick

9 September 2003
WE'RE LOOKING FOR A FEW GOOD MANAGERS!  If you think you have what it takes to match
wits and blades with some of the best managers in Alastari, then WE WANT YOU!  The
Tournament Of The Golden Scrod #4 will begin in Aradi (DM 60) the turn after the Fall
Mail-In.  It's not too late for you to sign up.  I realize that many of you may be
hesitant after seeing that myself and Hombre have teamed up again, but we'll try to
take it easy on you guys a little bit.  For more information on T#%S IV, please
contact me at ganolus@aol.com.  We're looking for a few good managers...the few, the
proud, the TOGS!

-- Ganolus Oakleaf, T#%S IV Commish

15 September 2003
An Announcement Concerning the Brotherhood of the Blade Alliance:
     I have chosen to withdraw my membership from the Brotherhood of the Blade
alliance.  The years I have spent in the alliance have been the best of my DM career.
I leave the alliance with many great friends and will always remain close to my
former brethren.
     The Brotherhood of the Blade will not skip a beat without my membership.  It
remains in very capable hands and its roster is among the strongest in the game.
With the return on some of its founding members to DM, I know the BOB will continue
to grow in strength and prestige in the years to come. -- The Sandman

29 September 2003
All -- Let it be known that the Firm accepts SOL into its ranks.  The Firm is:
SunGod, Dark Spirit, Youngblood, Tripwire, and SOL.

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

BARROCH devastated DUSKY JAWFISH in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge Title fight.
SILAS was demolished by LEE AT TOURNEY in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge melee.
ETCHED IN STONE outwaited A DIFFERENT GRAPE in a unpopular 27 minute Challenge brawl.
SLAYER II overpowered CHICK WITH A STICK in a 2 minute mismatched Challenge match.
CHRISTIANITY overpowered MOJO JOJO in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge struggle.
OH WELL was unbelievably bested by BLINKY in a action packed 3 minute Challenge fight.
SUE E. SYDE viciously subdued LUCRETIA BORGIA in a 2 minute Challenge duel.
GREE CHAK vanquished EXCREMENTO in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
LINK was overpowered by DOC STEELE in a popular 2 minute uneven Challenge match.
BEAR was overpowered by SINISTER MIDGET in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge match.
SHINY PENNY was handily defeated by TOLAIS DEEPHEART in a 1 minute Challenge contest.
JOB narrowly defeated LIFE in a popular 6 minute bloody Challenge brawl.
ELI was handily defeated by DOC STEELE in a popular 1 minute uneven Challenge fight.
LUC STARWALKER devastated BRADEN in a exciting 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
SEX ON THE BEACH was devastated by WENT TO MARKET in a 1 minute Challenge brawl.
NUMBERED WON overpowered MEN WORKING in a exciting 1 minute one-sided Challenge bout.
PATIENCE savagely defeated TYRONE in a popular 2 minute bloody Challenge match.
ARSONIST ART was bested by HOCKEY in a popular 2 minute Challenge contest.
DR DAZZLE defeated 3-7-2-D-S in a exciting 1 minute duel.
SPEEDI savagely defeated JACK BOY in a action packed 2 minute gruesome fray.
GEO METRO was devastated by MAHI MAHI in a popular 1 minute one-sided bout.
OSCAR THE SLOUCH was overpowered by SOLACIA in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
WHIRLING DOG overpowered BLACK WIDOW in a 2 minute one-sided duel.
MISS HONEY overpowered JANET RENO in a exciting 1 minute uneven match.
MR PIBB was vanquished by BUUL THE BULL in a action packed 1 minute one-sided fray.
RYGEL overpowered DRUNK AND AT DENNYS in a exciting 1 minute gory uneven competition.
CLEANER WRASSE overpowered DR NUT in a popular 1 minute brutal uneven duel.
SPLURGE ON WAX LIPS was demolished by FAT BASTARD in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
HARLEQUIN TUSKFISH was overpowered by SHOCKING TOAD in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
LARGE SPINNY GUY handily defeated SIR ENE in a 1 minute mismatched match.
VOLDRIC THE BLUE viciously subdued OBSESSIVE in a crowd pleasing 4 minute fight.
FLOATING SWISS savagely defeated DAVID CARUSO in a exciting 3 minute struggle.
FACEMAN overpowered LUIGI in a crowd pleasing 1 minute one-sided match.
BASS was demolished by DARK GUMBY in a 2 minute one-sided duel.
COOLER overpowered ZALTAN in a crowd pleasing 2 minute brutal one-sided duel.
BRAHMA handily defeated A NEW PONY! in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
MUCKER overpowered BIGFATHAIRYDEAL in a action packed 1 minute uneven battle.
WHIRLING WORD bested SCHYLER in a crowd pleasing 4 minute gruesome match.
HOT was handily defeated by NO SALARY CAP in a 1 minute mismatched fight.
TORNADO savagely defeated MAGINOT MIKE in a action packed 6 minute bloody competition.
SLEEPLESS PARANOIA was demolished by THANOS in a exciting 1 minute one-sided match.
ROB A. REE overpowered HUGE TWIRLING MAN in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
SLAYER 3 was beaten by THE WICKER KING in a popular 3 minute fray.
PROFFESSOR GRIM was overcome by QUID PRO QUO in a 2 minute duel.
ZOT ZIPZIG was subdued by TRUMP in a 2 minute match.
MIMIC BLENNY overcame BOOKIE'S GUARD in a exciting 1 minute bout.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                  24         TOTAL PARRY       54 -  41 -  0      57  |
|WALL OF STEEL                   15         WALL OF STEEL     84 -  67 -  0      56  |
|BASHING ATTACK                  13         LUNGING ATTACK   152 - 131 -  1      54  |
|AIMED BLOW                      11         SLASHING ATTACK   51 -  44 -  4      54  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      8         PARRY-LUNGE       25 -  23 -  0      52  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  7         PARRY-STRIKE      14 -  15 -  1      48  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      5         AIMED BLOW        51 -  64 -  0      44  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  5         STRIKING ATTACK   21 -  27 -  0      44  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     2         BASHING ATTACK    46 -  80 -  3      37  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    0         PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -   0 -  0       0  |

Turn 359 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-STRIKE       2 -  0     AIMED BLOW         5 -  6         4  LUNGING ATTACK 
WALL OF STEEL      9 -  6     SLASHING ATTACK    3 -  4         1  WALL OF STEEL  
LUNGING ATTACK    14 - 10     PARRY-LUNGE        2 -  3         1  PARRY-LUNGE    
                              STRIKING ATTACK    2 -  3         1  BASHING ATTACK 
                              BASHING ATTACK     5 -  8         1  PARRY-STRIKE   
                              TOTAL PARRY        3 -  5         1  AIMED BLOW     
                              PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  0         1  SLASHING ATTACK
                                                                1  STRIKING ATTACK

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
LUNGING ATTACK   BARROCH 18-2684            87  87  1  289 SHEPHERDS (432)
WALL OF STEEL    WHIRLING DOG 10-4177       59  29  1  249 MONGREL HORDE (964)
PARRY-LUNGE      LEE AT TOURNEY 4-3565     104 117  1  245 LETHAL LADIES (768)
BASHING ATTACK   BUUL THE BULL 2-4840       36  37  1  225 RESURRECTION (1143)
AIMED BLOW       LARGE SPINNY GUY 23-4361   51  29  2  224 DIABLO TOO (1037)
STRIKING ATTACK  MAHI MAHI 18-4899          82  59  1  220 BIG MEAN FISH (292)
TOTAL PARRY      VOLDRIC THE BLUE 18-6259   58  44  0  218 THUNDR + LITENING (309)
SLASHING ATTACK  COOLER 82-7277             27  12  1  208 STYROFOAM (1090)
PARRY-STRIKE     SHOCKING TOAD 7-310        47  60  1  200 NINJAS (1107)

The overall popularity leader is LEE AT TOURNEY 4-3565.  The most popular warrior 
this turn was TORNADO 6-2249.  The ten other most popular fighters were FLOATING 
SWISS 4-4461, LIFE 3-4196, MAGINOT MIKE 4-4509, OH WELL 10-2205, VOLDRIC THE BLUE 
18-6259, BLINKY 18-2683, SUE E. SYDE 39-3240, DOC STEELE 18-6808, HOCKEY 82-5719, and 
OBSESSIVE 58-2447.

The least popular fighter this week was ETCHED IN STONE 61-3112.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were HUGE TWIRLING MAN 24-4457, HOT 48-3858, A NEW PONY! 82-1306, 
HARLEQUIN TUSKFISH 18-6977, SPLURGE ON WAX LIPS 18-6485, SEX ON THE BEACH 54-2435, 
SHINY PENNY 32-3789, EXCREMENTO 51-4968, SILAS 18-6796, and SLEEPLESS PARANOIA 
82-2252.

Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  
NIANIA(2)            1  0 0  TI(23)               1  1 0  RODEKI(42)           4  1 0  
OSKSI(3)             0  1 0  ZORPUNT(24)          1  3 0  CAER(48)             1  1 0  
JHELUM(4)            2  2 0  LYRATILAN(25)        1  0 0  TRICORUS(51)         2  1 0  
KALTOS(5)            0  1 0  ARVAT(32)            0  1 0  TROCAR(54)           0  1 0  
TRANSEL(6)           2  6 0  JHANS(36)            1  0 0  ANDOR(57)            1  0 0  
BONSUR(7)            2  1 0  SIBIKHAS(37)         1  1 0  DELARQ TOR(58)       2  2 0  
KOLACT(10)           3  5 0  CLIFFHOME(38)        1  1 0  JURINE(61)           1  0 0  
TALCAMA(18)         11  5 0  XOCHITHLAN(39)       2  1 0  DWES EG(82)          3  9 0  
SUNSET(21)           0  1 0  KATI-TEI(41)         1  0 0  SHADOW GROVE(97)     1  0 0  

TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 BUUL THE BULL 2-4840        36  37  1  225  RESURRECTION (1143)        NIANIA
 LIFE 3-4196                 34 120  0  125  GAMES LIBRARY (998)        OSKSI
 LEE AT TOURNEY 4-3565      104 117  1  245  LETHAL LADIES (768)        JHELUM
 BASS 5-3666                 48  83  2  180  JOHNS (927)                KALTOS
 SCHYLER 6-4866              48  80  1  202  THE LADY'S LIST (917)      TRANSEL
 SHOCKING TOAD 7-310         47  60  1  200  NINJAS (1107)              BONSUR
 WHIRLING DOG 10-4177        59  29  1  249  MONGREL HORDE (964)        KOLACT
 BARROCH 18-2684             87  87  1  289  SHEPHERDS (432)            TALCAMA
 TYRONE 21-1769              29  21  1   56  DWARVEN LEGION (1139)      SUNSET
 LARGE SPINNY GUY 23-4361    51  29  2  224  DIABLO TOO (1037)          TI
 MR PIBB 24-4253             51  20  1  187  DP CLONES (1045)           ZORPUNT
 WENT TO MARKET 25-4288      15   9  2   65  THIS LITTLE PRIGGY (1162)  LYRATILAN
 SHINY PENNY 32-3789         28  59  2  140  FOUND IN THE SAND (1034)   ARVAT
 MISS HONEY 36-4850          60  51  0  250  SCARRY TEAM (824)          JHANS
 BLACK WIDOW 37-1303         51  59  2  192  BEAST MASTERS (136)        SIBIKHAS
 FACEMAN 38-4129             39  35  2  195  THE A TEAM (1044)          CLIFFHOME
 SUE E. SYDE 39-3240         36  27  1  189  CRIMINAL ELEMENT (1074)    XOCHITHLAN
 GREE CHAK 41-3859           37  25  2  183  KILLERS (1145)             KATI-TEI
 FAT BASTARD 42-3804         46  21  0  219  I'M SO SEXY (1072)         RODEKI
 WHIRLING WORD 48-3815       49  31  0  214  4-LETTER WORDS (1063)      CAER
 CHRISTIANITY 51-4965        37  32  0  184  GENOCIDE (1110)            TRICORUS
 SEX ON THE BEACH 54-2435    18   7  3   38  INDULGENT DRINKS (1153)    TROCAR
 DR DAZZLE 57-4485           42  25  0  216  PEPPER PRACTICE II (1069)  ANDOR
 SPEEDI 58-3029              90  76  3  301  SHAMROCKS (424)            DELARQ TOR
 ETCHED IN STONE 61-3112     30  11  0  191  CEMENTIA (1112)            JURINE
 COOLER 82-7277              27  12  1  208  STYROFOAM (1090)           DWES EG
 BRAHMA 97-731               26  28  4  205  ONE SURFING HINDU (1071)   SHADOW GROVE

               NEW GRADUATES--FROM ALL ARENAS (INCLUDING CLOSED ARENAS)

     For those of you who keep track of such things, 18 additional warriors graduated 
from regular DM arenas (including closed arenas) since the last tournament:

                          CAFFEINE JUNKIE (3-6110) ADDICTED 
                        CATFISH HUNTER (5-3315) PARTY ANIMALS 
                          MATTAHOOPLE (16-4203) GIFTED GODS 
                         SWEET JANE (53-6535) THE DARK TEMPLE 
                              LIL NOIR (62-3311) ENIGMA 
                         NARCISSISTIC NUN (69-8644) ODD SQUAD 
                             LEGION '8' (71-2369) D.O.A. 
                       RAW SEX APPEAL (82-1331) WHY WE LOVE TUM 
                         ZOMBIE STOMP (82-2617) NO MORE TEARS 
                        VIOLENT VOLE (82-4565) MAMMAL MILITIA 
                         LADY OF THE MOON (82-5481) HARM NONE 
                      KAMIKAZI GNAT (82-6073) DEADLY ATTACKS II 
                      THE 13TH WARRIOR (82-6346) STOOPID MOVIES 
                              SIRTON (82-9190) I AM SUCK 
                            DUNE (82-10414) 4-LETTER EPICS 
                           FLEM (82-12614) 4-LETTER FLUIDS 
                     GREENHOUSE EFFECT (82-12996) GLOBAL WARMING 
                         UGLY (82-14501) 4-LETTER DESCRIPTION 

                                          -- Green Eyes