DARKHOLM SPORTING JOURNAL
Date : 10/02/2004 Duedate: 10/15/2004
DARKHOLM
DM-104 TURN-385
RANK TEAMS W L K % RANK TEAMS W L K %
1 BLACK PRIMER 82/1187 1157 427 7 73.0 BEAN MACHINE 99/1202
LEGENDS OF STEELE 1/1047 9 BLADES OF ICE 7/192 392 384 2 50.5
2 MONGREL HORDE 10/964 486 237 3 67.2 BLADES OF CHAOS 5/961
3 DON'T ASK 82/1205 1535 1239 16 55.3 BLADES OF MIST 4/959
4-LETTER DOCTORS 82/1204 10 SHAMROCKS 58/424 171 169 3 50.3
DIRTY INFIRMARY 82/1206 11 THE CUTTHROATS 7/203 39 52 2 42.9
WHY WE LOVE TUM 82/1164 12 INDULGENT DR 54/1153 67 91 1 42.4
4-LETTER WORDS 48/1063 CRIMINAL ELEMENT 39/1074
WHAT I ATE FOR XMAS 82/1114 13 NINJAS 7/1107 73 105 1 41.0
STREET PIZZA 18/114 KILLERS 41/1145
MY WIFE'S COSMETICS 82/1038 SCIENCE FICTION 6/1191
STREET PIZZAD III 82/1190 14 BEAST MASTERS 37/136 137 202 2 40.4
LUST MUPPETS 32/1036 ELEMENTS OF PSI 58/423
4 IT'S NEW! 6/1195 1660 1400 6 54.2 KREWE OF DRUID 6/1186
NEGATIVE CASH FLOW 82/1197 ACTS OF NATURE 6/415
FLAT BROKE 82/1184 BEAST MASTERS 18/1192
MORE NEW TEAMS 2 5/1188 15 MUSIC TO KIL 96/1119 54 81 0 40.0
CEMENTIA 61/1112 16 DELVERS 42/1000 233 388 1 37.5
PEPPER PRACTICE II 57/1069 DOGS OF WAR 4/999
DP CLONES 24/1045 GAMES LIBRARY 3/998
WHAT A TREAT 98/1201 17 JOHNS 5/927 808 1421 16 36.2
DIABLO TOO 23/1037 SCARRY TEAM 36/824
WASTELAND 18/468 THE LADY'S LIST 6/917
WASTELAND II 7/500 ARROGANCE 18/732
I'M SO SEXY 42/1072 JUST BECAUSE 38/1151
MY DRUGS 98/1179 18 BIG BAD 7/1073 507 932 8 35.2
5 STYROFOAM 82/1090 1125 982 8 53.4 NEXT GENERATION 18/1150
6 QUBIT 10/1140 562 501 2 52.9 SHEPHERDS 18/432
ON A WHIM 82/1014 NEXT GENERATION 58/1075
SIR AGLIO 10/600 THIS LITTLE PRIGGY 25/1162
7 WHOA! JUMP BA 10/763 78 72 1 52.0 SUPER BASH BROTHERS 6/1067
8 THE A TEAM 38/1044 672 654 6 50.7 FOUND IN THE SAND 32/1034
BIG MEAN FISH 18/292
'##/###' Avoid teams by their Team Id '-' Team did not fight this turn
REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER
The dark-haired blonde couldn't make it today. I'm amazed she was able to get
up as early as she did in order to go rushing off. In fairness--I'm always fair,
because I'm damned near perfect--it isn't her fault this time. She was all ready to
do the report, and the Commission scribes let her down. Curse the louts anyway! I
myself have been hanging around for hours waiting for them to finish their paperwork.
But now that they finally HAVE done it--a bunch of Andorians, the lot of them--
here are the facts.
Next Generation was most avoided by Flat Broke. Next Generation got three
avoids, two from the same warrior. Only two other avoids were used, both against a
Wasteland team, and both from the same warrior. Now you know who is unpopular, eh?
And who isn't worth bothering about.
Braden got challenged more times than the Keeper of the Runeblade. Why? What
does he have that's so great?
Nobody died. Just as well, because little though that bloodthirsty wench
realizes, the expense of the resurrection is a heavy burden on the arena. Somebody,
I won't say who, but you'll recognize her because she carries a gray stick, is trying
to keep us poor and weak. Ha! One of these days SOON now, we'll show her who's
"poor and weak"!
So, the fights.
SUX0R (5-4560) (25-8-0,89) of MORE NEW TEAMS 2 fought ENDYMION (6-4163) (25-38-
1,69) of KREWE OF DRUID. SUX0R luckily beat ENDYMION in a popular 3 minute bloody
fight. Luck, was it? We don't want LUCKY warriors here, we want skilled and deadly
warriors! Let us hear no more about "lucky" victories!
MEN WORKING (38-4189) (27-58-1,74) of JUST BECAUSE fought FRIED TWINKIE (5-4562)
(23-6-0,73) of MORE NEW TEAMS 2. MEN WORKING savagely defeated FRIED TWINKIE in an
exciting 2 minute brutal conflict. "Fried Twinkie"? Gods, I am GLAD that so-called
warrior was savagely defeated. What REAL warrior would allow himself to be presented
under such a name?
B.A. TURRY (39-3383) (19-28-1,79) of CRIMINAL ELEMENT fought ASHANTI (6-5352)
(23-34-4,90) of KREWE OF DRUID. B.A. TURRY was overcome by ASHANTI in an exciting 1
minute duel. I wasn't excited by it. Were any of you excited? Was there, really,
anything to BE excited about in that blip of a fight?
HITZ (82-10428) (6-7-0,25) of 4-LETTER DOCTORS fought STUPID SEXY FLANDERS (42-
3836) (17-10-0,32) of I'M SO SEXY. HITZ overpowered STUPID SEXY FLANDERS in a 1
minute one-sided fray. Thus shall stupidity always be served, I hope, especially
stupidity that claims a Mordanti allegiance. There is not, in any case, so much lack
of intelligence to be found in the Osksian Empire, and I thank the gods for that.
STRAFE (82-11158) (18-15-0,69) of BLACK PRIMERS fought INKEEPER'S SON (104-4)
(15-15-0,40) of Local Fishermen. STRAFE overpowered INKEEPER'S SON in an action
packed 1 minute gory one-sided battle. I should hope SO! The Innkeeper's Son is not
exactly what you might call "tough" competition.
QSTAFF INFECTION (82-14523) (11-3-0,36) of DIRTY INFIRMARY fought DIRE WOLF (18-
7655) (18-17-2,73) of BEAST MASTERS. QSTAFF INFECTION handily defeated DIRE WOLF in
a 1 minute one-sided match. Not to be wondered at, really. You might not realize
it, because they try to keep it quiet to preserve their tough reputations, but wolves
are very sensitive to infections. True fact.
FRIJOLE (99-1214) (9-5-3,66) of BEAN MACHINE fought THE CUTICLE DANCE (82-13639)
(10-2-1,33) of DON'T ASK. FRIJOLE was devastated by THE CUTICLE DANCE in a 1 minute
mismatched match. Ah... I believe Frijole made the mistake of "asking" what the
dance in question was, or did, or referred to.
LUC STARWALKER (58-6100) (38-38-0,132) of NEXT GENERATION fought M. CHARDINEE
(104-8) (0-0-0,110) of Local Fishermen. LUC STARWALKER vanquished M. CHARDINEE in a
1 minute one-sided conflict. Is not this Luc person the one who died several times
in a row last year? Or maybe it was the year before. And now, he has a winning
record. Amazing how times change.
THRENODY (4-4557) (35-40-1,180) of BLADES OF MIST fought ARSONIST ART (39-3325)
(34-28-0,132) of CRIMINAL ELEMENT. THRENODY viciously subdued ARSONIST ART in an
exciting 9 minute bloody struggle. I should hope so! We can't have arsonists
running around the town, the place is a tinderbox. (I always KNEW those Xochithlani
were criminals.)
MAGINOT MIKE (4-4509) (58-70-1,165) of DOGS OF WAR fought DOC STEELE (18-6010)
(59-114-6,127) of ARROGANCE. MAGINOT MIKE was savagely defeated by DOC STEELE in an
exciting 1 minute fight. If it was only one minute long and included Maginot Mike,
that disgrace to a fine Jhelumite warrior tradition, then it wasn't exciting.
WENT TO MARKET (25-4288) (27-23-2,170) of THIS LITTLE PRIGGY fought REDEMPTION
(4-4868) (29-17-1,137) of BLADES OF MIST. WENT TO MARKET was handily defeated by
REDEMPTION in a 1 minute mismatched match. And I should hope so! We can't have
Andorians winning here, even if they had the good sense to choose the Delarquan
Federation over the Andorian League. That is simply not permissable.
STARBUCK (6-5387) (37-28-0,180) of SCIENCE FICTION fought CRACK IS CHEAP (82-
18422) (27-7-0,113) of NEGATIVE CASH FLOW. STARBUCK savagely defeated CRACK IS CHEAP
in an action packed 5 minute gory bout. So, if a negative cash flow is defeated,
does that mean it becomes a positive one? Or simply more negative?
ROB A. REE (39-3241) (40-28-1,178) of CRIMINAL ELEMENT fought LINK (6-5144) (28-
48-2,120) of SUPER BASH BROTHERS. ROB A. REE demolished LINK in an exciting 1 minute
gruesome mismatched match. Disgusting, I call it! Another of those Xochithlani
criminals, and he WON the fight! Link, you idiot!
SEX ON THE BEACH (54-2435) (31-19-3,168) of INDULGENT DRINKS fought QUID PRO QUO
(10-4794) (32-20-1,120) of QUBIT. SEX ON THE BEACH was narrowly defeated by QUID PRO
QUO in a popular 4 minute fray. "Narrowly defeated." I often wonder about those
"narrow defeats." Defeats in the narrows, yes, obviously, such as the classic,
heroic defeat at the Pass of Geothermalie, which allowed the invader--a Rirorni
horde, so far as I recall--to be defeated later. But I have the feeling that this is
NOT what is meant here. Unfortunate. There are many warriors who would be well
suited to one of those classic triumphant defeats. One of those defeats where
everyone dies....
TOLAIS DEEPHEART (42-1620) (91-105-0,170) of DELVERS fought NUMBERED WON (18-
7434) (29-27-0,150) of NEXT GENERATION. TOLAIS DEEPHEART devastated NUMBERED WON in
a 1 minute one-sided battle. And for this, Next Generation was avoided? Piffling.
ETCHED IN STONE (61-3112) (47-23-1,193) of CEMENTIA fought LIFE (3-4196) (43-
136-0,151) of GAMES LIBRARY. ETCHED IN STONE savagely defeated LIFE in an action
packed 13 minute gory contest. This was our longest fight, and the wonder to me
(besides the wonder of what a Karnhorn is doing fighting here) is that Etched could
stand to spend that long in the company of Life. You can't IMAGINE how glad we were
to get Life out of Osksi. Besides being a long-winded bore, it was stirring up
trouble among the other golems.
HE HATE ME (18-7820) (25-22-2,189) of WASTELAND fought OBSESSIVE (58-2447) (49-
48-1,194) of ELEMENTS OF PSI. HE HATE ME was overpowered by OBSESSIVE in a 1 minute
uneven bout. And one sees why the Talcaman is hated, probably by his manager.
TOWER (7-4461) (44-22-1,202) of BLADES OF ICE fought GRINGOLD (7-2416) (25-24-
2,165) of THE CUTTHROATS. TOWER was savagely defeated by GRINGOLD in a popular 4
minute brutal fight. If the Bonsurians want to fight among themselves, I let them do
it. Let them KILL each other, if they want to. The place is a hotbed of decadence
and perversion.
DUSKY JAWFISH (18-6978) (46-50-1,209) of BIG MEAN FISH fought MISS HONEY (36-
4850) (67-69-0,192) of SCARRY TEAM. DUSKY JAWFISH was overpowered by MISS HONEY in a
popular 1 minute brutal uneven duel. And who shall avenge the insult to, uh,
fishes... everywhere, that a big mean one should lose to a little girl?
DARK GUMBY (7-4694) (58-40-1,202) of WASTELAND II fought FACEMAN (38-4129) (51-
48-2,188) of THE A TEAM. DARK GUMBY was vanquished by FACEMAN in a 1 minute one-
sided bout. I hear that the winner in this fight is also called the "In-Your-Face-
Man." You can, perhaps, see why.
CLEANER WRASSE (18-6495) (74-65-2,207) of BIG MEAN FISH fought RAW SEX APPEAL
(82-1331) (22-10-0,157) of WHY WE LOVE TUM. CLEANER WRASSE handily defeated RAW SEX
APPEAL in an exciting 1 minute uneven bout. Apparently fish are susceptible to raw
sex appeal? Ah, that must be why they're called "cold fish." Perhaps it should be
cooked.... The sex appeal, although cooking the fish isn't a bad idea, either.
ANTONIO (10-2554) (41-47-2,196) of WHOA! JUMP BACK! fought SPEEDI (58-3029)
(107-84-3,210) of SHAMROCKS. ANTONIO was vanquished by SPEEDI in a 1 minute uneven
bout. I hear that someone, I name no names, has appealed to the Commission against
the use of four-leaf clovers and other "lucky" talismans in the arena, on the grounds
that the odds are being altered magically thereby. Some people really hate to lose.
COOLER (82-7277) (36-28-1,194) of STYROFOAM fought SIR ENE (10-4360) (53-36-
3,173) of SIR AGLIO. COOLER vanquished SIR ENE in an exciting 1 minute one-sided
fight. There is a note in the margin of these notes to the effect that Sir Ene was
"cooled off." That is a low and despicable pun, showing a serious lack of
imagination. It's so OBVIOUS.
WHIRLING DOG (10-4177) (64-34-1,208) of MONGREL HORDE fought SMOOGIE (82-2247)
(13-10-1,154) of STREET PIZZAD III. WHIRLING DOG won victory over SMOOGIE in a
popular 2 minute match. I seriously hope so! Smoogie? This is a WARRIOR? A
DELARQUAN warrior, the terror of all Alastari?
SPLURGE ON WAX LIPS (18-6485) (68-48-3,255) of STREET PIZZA fought BASS (5-3666)
(58-98-2,185) of JOHNS. SPLURGE ON WAX LIPS overpowered BASS in a popular 1 minute
one-sided match. Wax Lips... hmm. Can they be used to give Raw Sex Appeal a hickey?
A wax hickey? The thought boggles.
JANAE (5-3867) (59-45-3,213) of BLADES OF CHAOS fought A NEW PONY! (82-1306)
(29-32-0,197) of WHAT I ATE FOR XMAS. JANAE was vanquished by A NEW PONY! in a 1
minute mismatched fray. Trampled. It's the kind of thing that happens when you get
too close to horses. Either you get stepped on, or you step in, ah, things.
SILAS (18-6796) (43-65-2,215) of SHEPHERDS fought HARLEQUIN TUSKFISH (18-6977)
(51-44-0,189) of BIG MEAN FISH. SILAS was subdued by HARLEQUIN TUSKFISH in an action
packed 1 minute bout. Amazing tusks on that fish. I wonder if they could be made
into billiard balls?
RAMZA (7-4340) (60-36-2,234) of BLADES OF ICE fought ONE A DAY (98-799) (26-18-
3,199) of MY DRUGS. RAMZA devastated ONE A DAY in a popular 5 minute gruesome one-
sided contest. And how could it be otherwise, considering?
CHICK WITH A STICK (23-4365) (63-49-2,263) of DIABLO TOO fought RENAE (7-4304)
(63-43-3,200) of BLADES OF ICE. CHICK WITH A STICK was overpowered by RENAE in a
popular 1 minute one-sided bout. These Ice Blades are, if you will pardon the irony
here, hot today. A mere stick is helpless against them.
DR NUT (24-4254) (59-38-2,218) of DP CLONES fought MIMIC BLENNY (18-7541) (37-
22-1,223) of BIG MEAN FISH. DR NUT was bested by MIMIC BLENNY in an exciting 1
minute brutal fight. And well done! An Andorian, a damned cat-man? Eat him,
Blenny!
A DIFFERENT GRAPE (82-1258) (44-33-1,214) of MY WIFE'S COSMETICS fought
SHADOWMANE (104-28) (0-0-0,200) of Local Fishermen. A DIFFERENT GRAPE was viciously
subdued by SHADOWMANE in a 4 minute bout. Shadowmane has a long history of subduing
grapes, usually in the form of pressed grapes, the juice of, fermented. "Different"
is not enough to protect against such expertise.
BLACK WIDOW (37-1303) (65-70-3,274) of BEAST MASTERS fought ROLEX WATCH (32-
3732) (51-48-1,194) of LUST MUPPETS. BLACK WIDOW vanquished ROLEX WATCH in an action
packed 1 minute mismatched bout. "Lust muppets"? The very concept is disturbing. I
salute Black Widow for dealing with it.
DR DAZZLE (57-4485) (66-32-2,228) of PEPPER PRACTICE II fought JACK BOY (82-
2030) (80-59-0,205) of ON A WHIM. DR DAZZLE savagely defeated JACK BOY in a crowd
pleasing 2 minute gory conflict. Jack Boy, you wimp, how could you let this less-
experienced Andorian get the better of you?
WHIRLING WORD (48-3815) (70-39-1,235) of 4-LETTER WORDS fought TORNADO (6-2249)
(34-46-2,196) of ACTS OF NATURE. WHIRLING WORD demolished TORNADO in a 1 minute
mismatched match. I suppose this is somewhat appropriate, but nobody said I had to
LIKE it.
The challenge matches (all eleven of them):
RED FUSION (6-5480) (26-6-0,90) of IT'S NEW! challenged BRADEN (6-4867) (58-95-
0,81) of THE LADY'S LIST. Down 9. RED FUSION bested BRADEN in a crowd pleasing 5
minute Challenge conflict. Red Fusion, that is disgusting! You took FIVE minutes to
defeat Braden? What did you do, read a newspaper during the fight? If you're going
to down-challenge for a win, a perfectly respectable proceeding as all Delarquans
know, you should TRY HARDER. The bookies assumed THREE times that you had lost and
altered the odds to reflect that, and I assure they are NOT happy with you now.
MUMPHY CHICK (1-5487) (21-1-0,131) of LEGENDS OF STEELE challenged ELI (18-7272)
(24-38-3,121) of SHEPHERDS. Down 10. MUMPHY CHICK luckily beat ELI in an exciting 4
minute brutal Challenge fight. Luck? Again the "lucky win." I hate seeing that.
Win with skill, win with guts, win with cunning, do not count on "luck."
SALESGUN (1-6745) (22-38-2,149) of LEGENDS OF STEELE challenged LUIGI (6-5142)
(32-49-2,108) of SUPER BASH BROTHERS. Down 41. SALESGUN savagely defeated LUIGI in
an exciting 4 minute gruesome Challenge fight. Much better. Gore and grue bring the
crowds back again and again. Savagery, too.
PTI (7-5412) (27-11-0,134) of WASTELAND II challenged SHINY PENNY (32-3789) (35-
72-2,164) of FOUND IN THE SAND. Up 40. PTI won victory over SHINY PENNY in a 2
minute Challenge duel. A loss like this puts a serious tarnish on the Penny, does it
not? Good! Damned Free Blader.
SUPER BUM (82-18411) (27-11-0,156) of FLAT BROKE challenged SCHYLER (6-4866)
(58-95-1,180) of THE LADY'S LIST. Up 24. SUPER BUM was viciously subdued by SCHYLER
in an action packed 3 minute Challenge duel. And to think that Super Bum
deliberately sought out this match! He avoided, you know, AND issued a challenge,
and what does he get? A sound defeat.
GREE CHAK (41-3859) (48-38-2,176) of KILLERS challenged PEGASUS (6-4161) (27-35-
1,140) of KREWE OF DRUID. Down 36. GREE CHAK handily defeated PEGASUS in an action
packed 1 minute uneven Challenge fight. An Andorian killer? Ah, well, we always
knew the Andorians were hypocrits. Although... only two deaths on his record, what
kind of killer is that?
DEORNE (7-2529) (75-55-1,203) of BLADES OF ICE challenged DOC STEELE (18-6808)
(48-67-1,210) of ARROGANCE. Up 7. DEORNE overpowered DOC STEELE in a 1 minute one-
sided Challenge struggle. You do realize, Deorne, that when you strike the Doc
Steele of Arrogance, you're likely to cause him to split in two? Sort of like an
amoeba. And soon there are two, or three, or four Doc Steeles of Arrogance running
around....
TAPS (96-841) (26-22-5,200) of MUSIC TO KILL BY challenged MAHI MAHI (18-4899)
(101-65-1,225) of BIG MEAN FISH. Up 25. TAPS was demolished by MAHI MAHI in a 3
minute mismatched Challenge competition. Taps may be inept, but he's bold, yes?
And, now, he's fishbait.
NEOSPHINCTER (18-7317) (27-16-1,183) of WASTELAND challenged MUCKER (42-3596)
(58-67-1,199) of DELVERS. Up 16. NEOSPHINCTER was devastated by MUCKER in a 1
minute one-sided Challenge contest. Amazing what that golem can do with a shovel.
HEAT (98-981) (10-4-4,22) of WHAT A TREAT TV challenged WORK IN PROGRESS (38-
4193) (21-64-2,40) of JUST BECAUSE. Up 18. HEAT was devastated by WORK IN PROGRESS
in a 2 minute mismatched Challenge fight. I presume when Heat has more experience,
he or she or it will be a formdiable opponent, but now.... Ah, well, a TV challenge
is nothing to sneer at. Well, not MUCH to sneer at.
And for the Runeblade: RAZOX (7-2400) (81-56-1,222) of BLADES OF ICE challenged
SHOCKING TOAD (7-310) (60-72-1,271) of NINJAS. Up 49. RAZOX overcame SHOCKING TOAD
in a popular 2 minute gruesome Challenge Title match. And a hearty congratulations
to Razox. Guard the Runeblade well, for it may be the weapon that defeats the Old
Woman with the Gray Stick. You never know.
Ketchum
KEEPER OF THE RUNEBLADE W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
RAZOX 7-2400 82 56 1 230 BLADES OF ICE (192) BONSUR
GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
BLACK WIDOW 37-1303 66 70 3 285 BEAST MASTERS (136) SIBIKHAS
SPLURGE ON WAX LIP 18-6485 69 48 3 262 STREET PIZZA (114) TALCAMA
RAMZA 7-4340 61 36 2 251 BLADES OF ICE (192) BONSUR
DR DAZZLE 57-4485 67 32 2 247 PEPPER PRACTICE II (1069) ANDOR
WHIRLING WORD 48-3815 71 39 1 244 4-LETTER WORDS (1063) CAER
MIMIC BLENNY 18-7541 38 22 1 242 BIG MEAN FISH (292) TALCAMA
MAHI MAHI 18-4899 102 65 1 240 BIG MEAN FISH (292) TALCAMA
SPEEDI 58-3029 108 84 3 220 SHAMROCKS (424) DELARQ TOR
RENAE 7-4304 64 43 3 218 BLADES OF ICE (192) BONSUR
A NEW PONY! 82-1306 30 32 0 217 WHAT I ATE FOR XMAS (1114) DWES EG
DEORNE 7-2529 76 55 1 214 BLADES OF ICE (192) BONSUR
FACEMAN 38-4129 52 48 2 214 THE A TEAM (1044) CLIFFHOME
CLEANER WRASSE 18-6495 75 65 2 213 BIG MEAN FISH (292) TALCAMA
MUCKER 42-3596 59 67 1 212 DELVERS (1000) RODEKI
COOLER 82-7277 37 28 1 211 STYROFOAM (1090) DWES EG
GRAND CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
WHIRLING DOG 10-4177 65 34 1 210 MONGREL HORDE (964) KOLACT
MISS HONEY 36-4850 68 69 0 209 SCARRY TEAM (824) JHANS
JACK BOY 82-2030 80 60 0 205 ON A WHIM (1014) DWES EG
OBSESSIVE 58-2447 50 48 1 205 ELEMENTS OF PSI (423) DELARQ TOR
SHOCKING TOAD 7-310 60 73 1 203 NINJAS (1107) BONSUR
GRINGOLD 7-2416 26 24 2 202 THE CUTTHROATS (203) BONSUR
HARLEQUIN TUSKFISH 18-6977 52 44 0 201 BIG MEAN FISH (292) TALCAMA
DR NUT 24-4254 59 39 2 200 DP CLONES (1045) ZORPUNT
TAPS 96-841 26 23 5 200 MUSIC TO KILL BY (1119) OLD VALAMANTIS
-RYGEL 18-7142 50 44 1 196 WASTELAND (468) TALCAMA
A DIFFERENT GRAPE 82-1258 44 34 1 196 MY WIFE'S COSMETICS (1038) DWES EG
ONE A DAY 98-799 26 19 3 196 MY DRUGS (1179) SYVYN'S HILL
GRAND CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
CHICK WITH A STICK 23-4365 63 50 2 195 DIABLO TOO (1037) TI
DOC STEELE 18-6808 48 68 1 195 ARROGANCE (732) TALCAMA
ETCHED IN STONE 61-3112 48 23 1 195 CEMENTIA (1112) JURINE
TORNADO 6-2249 34 47 2 195 ACTS OF NATURE (415) TRANSEL
ANTONIO 10-2554 41 48 2 193 WHOA! JUMP BACK! (763) KOLACT
SILAS 18-6796 43 66 2 191 SHEPHERDS (432) TALCAMA
SCHYLER 6-4866 59 95 1 190 THE LADY'S LIST (917) TRANSEL
JANAE 5-3867 59 46 3 188 BLADES OF CHAOS (961) KALTOS
ROLEX WATCH 32-3732 51 49 1 186 LUST MUPPETS (1036) ARVAT
DUSKY JAWFISH 18-6978 46 51 1 186 BIG MEAN FISH (292) TALCAMA
DARK GUMBY 7-4694 58 41 1 185 WASTELAND II (500) BONSUR
BASS 5-3666 58 99 2 184 JOHNS (927) KALTOS
STARBUCK 6-5387 38 28 0 182 SCIENCE FICTION (1191) TRANSEL
THRENODY 4-4557 36 40 1 182 BLADES OF MIST (959) JHELUM
HE HATE ME 18-7820 25 23 2 181 WASTELAND (468) TALCAMA
GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
ROB A. REE 39-3241 41 28 1 180 CRIMINAL ELEMENT (1074) XOCHITHLAN
TOWER 7-4461 44 23 1 179 BLADES OF ICE (192) BONSUR
GREE CHAK 41-3859 49 38 2 178 KILLERS (1145) KATI-TEI
TOLAIS DEEPHEART 42-1620 92 105 0 177 DELVERS (1000) RODEKI
NEOSPHINCTER 18-7317 27 17 1 177 WASTELAND (468) TALCAMA
SIR ENE 10-4360 53 37 3 173 SIR AGLIO (600) KOLACT
SMOOGIE 82-2247 13 11 1 170 STREET PIZZAD III (1190) DWES EG
REDEMPTION 4-4868 30 17 1 167 BLADES OF MIST (959) JHELUM
LIFE 3-4196 43 137 0 166 GAMES LIBRARY (998) OSKSI
RAW SEX APPEAL 82-1331 22 11 0 161 WHY WE LOVE TUM (1164) DWES EG
QUID PRO QUO 10-4794 33 20 1 158 QUBIT (1140) KOLACT
SUPER BUM 82-18411 27 12 0 158 FLAT BROKE (1184) DWES EG
PTI 7-5412 28 11 0 155 WASTELAND II (500) BONSUR
DOC STEELE 18-6010 60 114 6 154 ARROGANCE (732) TALCAMA
SALESGUN 1-6745 23 38 2 151 LEGENDS OF STEELE (1047) MORDANT
GRAND ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
SHINY PENNY 32-3789 35 73 2 149 FOUND IN THE SAND (1034) ARVAT
WENT TO MARKET 25-4288 27 24 2 146 THIS LITTLE PRIGGY (1162) LYRATILAN
-BEAR 7-4628 27 45 1 146 BIG BAD (1073) BONSUR
SEX ON THE BEACH 54-2435 31 20 3 145 INDULGENT DRINKS (1153) TROCAR
NUMBERED WON 18-7434 29 28 0 145 NEXT GENERATION (1150) TALCAMA
ARSONIST ART 39-3325 34 29 0 142 CRIMINAL ELEMENT (1074) XOCHITHLAN
PEGASUS 6-4161 27 36 1 142 KREWE OF DRUID (1186) TRANSEL
MAGINOT MIKE 4-4509 58 71 1 141 DOGS OF WAR (999) JHELUM
LUC STARWALKER 58-6100 39 38 0 136 NEXT GENERATION (1075) DELARQ TOR
MUMPHY CHICK 1-5487 22 1 0 134 LEGENDS OF STEELE (1047) MORDANT
CRACK IS CHEAP 82-18422 27 8 0 129 NEGATIVE CASH FLOW (1197) DWES EG
LINK 6-5144 28 49 2 128 SUPER BASH BROTHERS (1067) TRANSEL
ELI 18-7272 24 39 3 127 SHEPHERDS (432) TALCAMA
LUIGI 6-5142 32 50 2 116 SUPER BASH BROTHERS (1067) TRANSEL
GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
RED FUSION 6-5480 27 6 0 94 IT'S NEW! (1195) TRANSEL
ASHANTI 6-5352 24 34 4 93 KREWE OF DRUID (1186) TRANSEL
MEN WORKING 38-4189 28 58 1 91 JUST BECAUSE (1151) CLIFFHOME
SUX0R 5-4560 26 8 0 91 MORE NEW TEAMS 2 (1188) KALTOS
GRAND INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
BRADEN 6-4867 58 96 0 86 THE LADY'S LIST (917) TRANSEL
ENDYMION 6-4163 25 39 1 77 KREWE OF DRUID (1186) TRANSEL
B.A. TURRY 39-3383 19 29 1 77 CRIMINAL ELEMENT (1074) XOCHITHLAN
STRAFE 82-11158 19 15 0 73 BLACK PRIMERS (1187) DWES EG
FRIED TWINKIE 5-4562 23 7 0 68 MORE NEW TEAMS 2 (1188) KALTOS
QSTAFF INFECTION 82-14523 12 3 0 66 DIRTY INFIRMARY (1206) DWES EG
THE CUTICLE DANCE 82-13639 11 2 1 63 DON'T ASK (1205) DWES EG
GRAND INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
WORK IN PROGRESS 38-4193 22 64 2 51 JUST BECAUSE (1151) CLIFFHOME
DIRE WOLF 18-7655 18 18 2 46 BEAST MASTERS (1192) TALCAMA
HITZ 82-10428 7 7 0 44 4-LETTER DOCTORS (1204) DWES EG
FRIJOLE 99-1214 9 6 3 41 BEAN MACHINE (1202) SOUTH RIDGE
STUPID SEXY FLANDE 42-3836 17 11 0 18 I'M SO SEXY (1072) RODEKI
HEAT 98-981 10 5 4 18 WHAT A TREAT (1201) SYVYN'S HILL
'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.
THE DEAD W L K TEAM NAME SLAIN BY TURN
PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE
Doc Steele -- If I cared about the losses, I'd start challenging back, but the
reality is I just don't care all that much. I looked at knocking Mumphy Chick (and
her inflated record) around with my Numbered Won and decided I'd rather challenge for
skills than come after you. So abuse away and show me why bashers don't belong in
ADM! I won't avoid you here per our no avoids in advanced pact. -- Assur
Maginot Mike -- Fair enough--two hits for two hits. I gotta stop eating that low fat
honey. -- Bear
Speedi -- Thanks for the skill! Do you have another 1-2 for me this turn? I may
actually complete my collection soon! -- Went To Market
Raw Sex Appeal -- You should see about repairing those scars and I might agree. They
take most of the appeal away. Especially the one running up your face! -- Link
Rygel -- Well fought! For a fight like that, I may look you up again and soon, win
or lose! -- Silas
Bass -- 3666? The number of the beast, twice over! Gods (in so far as a golem would
or should appeal to any gods), I knew you were beastly, but this PROVES it. Too bad
the arenamaster stepped in. -- Mucker
The number, then, is 1833? Who knew? -- Desiree
A New Pony! -- I curse the gods in frustration as I am trampled into the sands by an
<expletive deleted> rocking horse. -- Tolais Deepheart
Quid Pro Quo -- Oh, sure, you SAY that, but do you MEAN it? I don't think so!
Nobody--no flesh person--offers that to a golem. You're all JEALOUS of our
perfection. -- Life of Osksi
Bear -- Ay, I see you really ARE big. Good, I like it when things mean what they
mean. Um, when they mean what they say, I mean. But you weren't, well, THIS time
you weren't BAD. Except for not teaching me anything. But I think losing shows a
very nice understanding of something or other. Thank you. -- Maginot Mike, who
doesn't need to wake up in the Infirmary to be confused
Desiree -- Those blondes who get smarter when they darken their hair belong to the
Artificial Intelligence Research Headquarters, known as AIR Head for short. -- Nick
(Grinning)
And now back to your regularly scheduled personal ads. -- Ed.
Assur -- I assume the cut off personal ad about not caring about loses was from you
last turn. Just so you know, I notched up the intensity of the brutal challenges by
doubling you with all 3 of my guys when I was a bit angry with you in Talcama. And
now, you are caught in the cut and paste email strategy loop of death. I challenged
a couple of different guys this time that were not you, but I think 2 of 3 primaries
were your guys still. Anyway, one of these days I'll have more time and I will find
new targets. Although, the choices are limited. Maybe you can get your revenge on
Wiggler, while she is young. -- Doc Steele
Numbered Won -- Ah, but perhaps if you were Numbered Tu, you'd try harder? -- Tolais
Deepheart
Shiny Penny -- You disgusting coin of little value! Do you think I was not AWARE of
your tricks? Copper plated armor polished to a mirror finish in order to reflect the
sunlight into your opponent's eyes--Ha! I knew all about it! You didn't take ME by
surprise, because I am, as you know but won't admit, a perfectly created golem! I
merely allowed you to do your worst in order to EXPOSE your petty subterfuges to the
public gaze. Take THAT, you worthless flake of metal! -- Life of Osksi
Tower -- I wish you wouldn't do that. I'm trying really hard here to be a true
warrior and win by striking blows, and then YOU come along. (sigh) Oh, well, good
fight. -- Maginot Mike
Deorne -- I'm not rated for ice, or for any really cold weather. My oil gets thick
and my moving parts tend toward brittleness. So a sword of ice is really dangerous
for me. -- Mucker
Ed. -- May we have last turn's personals over again? I had a good one there, and you
forgot to put line-breaks in. -- Nick
*sigh* Yes, it was definitely one of THOSE days. -- Ed.
20 September 2004
Azereth has returned! I am the manager for Scarlet Blades in DM 25. I was a member
of the Crimson Alliance and the Crimson Brotherhood (which was composed of former CA
members). I've been out of the game for many (at least 5) years. I would like to
hear from anyone who remembers me, as well as any Alliance that is seeking to add
experienced managers to their roster. Contact me at:
Anthony Wells
600 W. Shore Dr.
Stanton, MI 48888
or by personal ads in DM 25.
LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS
HEAT was devastated by WORK IN PROGRESS in a 2 minute mismatched Challenge fight.
RAZOX overcame SHOCKING TOAD in a popular 2 minute gruesome Challenge Title match.
NEOSPHINCTER was devastated by MUCKER in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge contest.
TAPS was demolished by MAHI MAHI in a 3 minute mismatched Challenge competition.
DEORNE overpowered DOC STEELE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge struggle.
GREE CHAK handily defeated PEGASUS in a action packed 1 minute uneven Challenge fight.
SUPER BUM was viciously subdued by SCHYLER in a action packed 3 minute Challenge duel.
PTI won victory over SHINY PENNY in a 2 minute Challenge duel.
SALESGUN savagely defeated LUIGI in a exciting 4 minute gruesome Challenge fight.
MUMPHY CHICK luckily beat ELI in a exciting 4 minute brutal Challenge fight.
RED FUSION bested BRADEN in a crowd pleasing 5 minute Challenge conflict.
WHIRLING WORD demolished TORNADO in a 1 minute mismatched match.
DR DAZZLE savagely defeated JACK BOY in a crowd pleasing 2 minute gory conflict.
BLACK WIDOW vanquished ROLEX WATCH in a action packed 1 minute mismatched bout.
A DIFFERENT GRAPE was viciously subdued by SHADOWMANE in a 4 minute bout.
DR NUT was bested by MIMIC BLENNY in a exciting 1 minute brutal fight.
CHICK WITH A STICK was overpowered by RENAE in a popular 1 minute one-sided bout.
RAMZA devastated ONE A DAY in a popular 5 minute gruesome one-sided contest.
SILAS was subdued by HARLEQUIN TUSKFISH in a action packed 1 minute bout.
JANAE was vanquished by A NEW PONY! in a 1 minute mismatched fray.
SPLURGE ON WAX LIPS overpowered BASS in a popular 1 minute one-sided match.
WHIRLING DOG won victory over SMOOGIE in a popular 2 minute match.
COOLER vanquished SIR ENE in a exciting 1 minute one-sided fight.
ANTONIO was vanquished by SPEEDI in a 1 minute uneven bout.
CLEANER WRASSE handily defeated RAW SEX APPEAL in a exciting 1 minute uneven bout.
DARK GUMBY was vanquished by FACEMAN in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
DUSKY JAWFISH was overpowered by MISS HONEY in a popular 1 minute brutal uneven duel.
TOWER was savagely defeated by GRINGOLD in a popular 4 minute brutal fight.
HE HATE ME was overpowered by OBSESSIVE in a 1 minute uneven bout.
ETCHED IN STONE savagely defeated LIFE in a action packed 13 minute gory contest.
TOLAIS DEEPHEART devastated NUMBERED WON in a 1 minute one-sided battle.
SEX ON THE BEACH was narrowly defeated by QUID PRO QUO in a popular 4 minute fray.
ROB A. REE demolished LINK in a exciting 1 minute gruesome mismatched match.
STARBUCK savagely defeated CRACK IS CHEAP in a action packed 5 minute gory bout.
WENT TO MARKET was handily defeated by REDEMPTION in a 1 minute mismatched match.
MAGINOT MIKE was savagely defeated by DOC STEELE in a exciting 1 minute fight.
THRENODY viciously subdued ARSONIST ART in a exciting 9 minute bloody struggle.
LUC STARWALKER vanquished M. CHARDINEE in a 1 minute one-sided conflict.
FRIJOLE was devastated by THE CUTICLE DANCE in a 1 minute mismatched match.
QSTAFF INFECTION handily defeated DIRE WOLF in a 1 minute one-sided match.
STRAFE overpowered INKEEPER'S SON in a action packed 1 minute gory one-sided battle.
HITZ overpowered STUPID SEXY FLANDERS in a 1 minute one-sided fray.
B.A. TURRY was overcome by ASHANTI in a exciting 1 minute duel.
MEN WORKING savagely defeated FRIED TWINKIE in a exciting 2 minute brutal conflict.
SUX0R luckily beat ENDYMION in a popular 3 minute bloody fight.
BATTLE REPORT
MOST POPULAR RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS
|FIGHTING STYLE FIGHTS FIGHTING STYLE W - L - K PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK 24 TOTAL PARRY 73 - 49 - 0 60 |
|WALL OF STEEL 14 PARRY-LUNGE 18 - 13 - 0 58 |
|TOTAL PARRY 13 WALL OF STEEL 83 - 65 - 0 56 |
|SLASHING ATTACK 8 LUNGING ATTACK 122 - 106 - 0 54 |
|BASHING ATTACK 8 AIMED BLOW 35 - 31 - 0 53 |
|AIMED BLOW 7 PARRY-STRIKE 9 - 8 - 0 53 |
|STRIKING ATTACK 5 STRIKING ATTACK 21 - 19 - 0 53 |
|PARRY-LUNGE 4 SLASHING ATTACK 37 - 55 - 1 40 |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE 2 BASHING ATTACK 32 - 63 - 0 34 |
|PARRY-STRIKE 2 PARRY-RIPOSTE 6 - 14 - 0 30 |
Turn 385 was great if you Not so great if you used The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles: the fighting styles: top eleven warriors are:
LUNGING ATTACK 16 - 8 AIMED BLOW 3 - 4 4 LUNGING ATTACK
WALL OF STEEL 9 - 5 TOTAL PARRY 5 - 8 2 WALL OF STEEL
SLASHING ATTACK 5 - 3 BASHING ATTACK 2 - 6 2 SLASHING ATTACK
STRIKING ATTACK 3 - 2 PARRY-LUNGE 0 - 4 2 AIMED BLOW
PARRY-RIPOSTE 1 - 1 PARRY-STRIKE 0 - 2 1 STRIKING ATTACK
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE
FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME
WALL OF STEEL RAZOX 7-2400 82 56 1 230 BLADES OF ICE (192)
SLASHING ATTACK BLACK WIDOW 37-1303 66 70 3 285 BEAST MASTERS (136)
AIMED BLOW SPLURGE ON WAX LI 18-6485 69 48 3 262 STREET PIZZA (114)
LUNGING ATTACK RAMZA 7-4340 61 36 2 251 BLADES OF ICE (192)
STRIKING ATTACK MAHI MAHI 18-4899 102 65 1 240 BIG MEAN FISH (292)
TOTAL PARRY DEORNE 7-2529 76 55 1 214 BLADES OF ICE (192)
PARRY-STRIKE SHOCKING TOAD 7-310 60 73 1 203 NINJAS (1107)
PARRY-RIPOSTE TAPS 96-841 26 23 5 200 MUSIC TO KILL BY (1119)
PARRY-LUNGE DOC STEELE 18-6808 48 68 1 195 ARROGANCE (732)
FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME
BASHING ATTACK SILAS 18-6796 43 66 2 191 SHEPHERDS (432)
The overall popularity leader is SPEEDI 58-3029. The most popular warrior this turn
was STARBUCK 6-5387. The ten other most popular fighters were BRADEN 6-4867, ELI
18-7272, GRINGOLD 7-2416, RAMZA 7-4340, ETCHED IN STONE 61-3112, LIFE 3-4196, SCHYLER
6-4866, LUIGI 6-5142, THRENODY 4-4557, and ENDYMION 6-4163.
The least popular fighter this week was STUPID SEXY FLANDERS 42-3836. The other ten
least popular fighters were DIRE WOLF 18-7655, HE HATE ME 18-7820, DARK GUMBY 7-4694,
ANTONIO 10-2554, JANAE 5-3867, B.A. TURRY 39-3383, FRIJOLE 99-1214, MAGINOT MIKE
4-4509, WENT TO MARKET 25-4288, and LINK 6-5144.
Arena (Number) W L K Arena (Number) W L K Arena (Number) W L K
MORDANT(1) 2 0 0 ZORPUNT(24) 0 1 0 CAER(48) 1 0 0
OSKSI(3) 0 1 0 LYRATILAN(25) 0 1 0 TROCAR(54) 0 1 0
JHELUM(4) 2 1 0 ARVAT(32) 0 2 0 ANDOR(57) 1 0 0
KALTOS(5) 1 3 0 JHANS(36) 1 0 0 DELARQ TOR(58) 3 0 0
TRANSEL(6) 4 6 0 SIBIKHAS(37) 1 0 0 JURINE(61) 1 0 0
BONSUR(7) 6 3 0 CLIFFHOME(38) 3 0 0 DWES EG(82) 6 6 0
KOLACT(10) 2 2 0 XOCHITHLAN(39) 1 2 0 OLD VALAMANTIS(96) 0 1 0
TALCAMA(18) 6 8 0 KATI-TEI(41) 1 0 0 SYVYN'S HILL(98) 0 2 0
TI(23) 0 1 0 RODEKI(42) 2 1 0 SOUTH RIDGE(99) 0 1 0
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
SALESGUN 1-6745 23 38 2 151 LEGENDS OF STEELE (1047) MORDANT
LIFE 3-4196 43 137 0 166 GAMES LIBRARY (998) OSKSI
THRENODY 4-4557 36 40 1 182 BLADES OF MIST (959) JHELUM
JANAE 5-3867 59 46 3 188 BLADES OF CHAOS (961) KALTOS
TORNADO 6-2249 34 47 2 195 ACTS OF NATURE (415) TRANSEL
RAZOX 7-2400 82 56 1 230 BLADES OF ICE (192) BONSUR
WHIRLING DOG 10-4177 65 34 1 210 MONGREL HORDE (964) KOLACT
SPLURGE ON WAX LIP 18-6485 69 48 3 262 STREET PIZZA (114) TALCAMA
CHICK WITH A STICK 23-4365 63 50 2 195 DIABLO TOO (1037) TI
DR NUT 24-4254 59 39 2 200 DP CLONES (1045) ZORPUNT
WENT TO MARKET 25-4288 27 24 2 146 THIS LITTLE PRIGGY (1162) LYRATILAN
ROLEX WATCH 32-3732 51 49 1 186 LUST MUPPETS (1036) ARVAT
MISS HONEY 36-4850 68 69 0 209 SCARRY TEAM (824) JHANS
BLACK WIDOW 37-1303 66 70 3 285 BEAST MASTERS (136) SIBIKHAS
FACEMAN 38-4129 52 48 2 214 THE A TEAM (1044) CLIFFHOME
ROB A. REE 39-3241 41 28 1 180 CRIMINAL ELEMENT (1074) XOCHITHLAN
GREE CHAK 41-3859 49 38 2 178 KILLERS (1145) KATI-TEI
MUCKER 42-3596 59 67 1 212 DELVERS (1000) RODEKI
WHIRLING WORD 48-3815 71 39 1 244 4-LETTER WORDS (1063) CAER
SEX ON THE BEACH 54-2435 31 20 3 145 INDULGENT DRINKS (1153) TROCAR
DR DAZZLE 57-4485 67 32 2 247 PEPPER PRACTICE II (1069) ANDOR
SPEEDI 58-3029 108 84 3 220 SHAMROCKS (424) DELARQ TOR
ETCHED IN STONE 61-3112 48 23 1 195 CEMENTIA (1112) JURINE
A NEW PONY! 82-1306 30 32 0 217 WHAT I ATE FOR XMAS (1114) DWES EG
TAPS 96-841 26 23 5 200 MUSIC TO KILL BY (1119) OLD VALAMANTIS
ONE A DAY 98-799 26 19 3 196 MY DRUGS (1179) SYVYN'S HILL
FRIJOLE 99-1214 9 6 3 41 BEAN MACHINE (1202) SOUTH RIDGE