DARKHOLM SPORTING JOURNAL Date : 07/04/2009 Duedate: 07/17/2009 DARKHOLM DM-104 TURN-509 RANK TEAMS W L K % RANK TEAMS W L K % 1 072905R 41/1273 3597 2615 14 57.9 LARGE LOSERS 5/1228 CEMENTIA 61/1112 NEGATIVE CASH FLOW 82/1197 FLAT BROKE 82/1184 2 STREET PIZZA 18/114 1966 1629 23 54.7 MY DRUGS 98/1179 REAL PIZZA FLAVOR 82/1286 LOOK OUT! 16/1278 ATTACK OF THE CLONES 82/1254 THE NEPHEW 82/1322 DYSLEXICS UNTIE! II 82/1258 DIE, MOFO, DIE IV 97/1293 3 STYROFOAM 82/1090 1182 1049 8 53.0 WASTELAND 18/468 4 ILLFANG PACT 1/281 408 589 6 40.9 WASTELAND II 7/500 UP TO NO GOOD 37/316 IT'S NEW! 6/1195 5 JUST BECAUSE 38/1151 1050 1884 17 35.8 I'M SO SEXY 42/1072 6 BEACH BABES 7/1058 408 773 4 34.5 WHAT A TREAT 98/1201 7-THE VOLS 6/1314 1 1 1 50.0 '##/###' Avoid teams by their Team Id '-' Team did not fight this turn WARRIOR SPOTLIGHT * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * ---===DELARQUAN REGIONAL NEWS===--- Duelmasters ----------- DM 1 MORDANT (turn 626): ENURAM of DESOLATE TEMPLE (Toker, mgr.) DM 2 NIANIA (turn 509): GALLORDIN of THE GOLDEN FISH (Jorja, mgr.) DM 3 OSKSI (turn 632): FARFALE of PASTA (Papa Bear, mgr.) DM 5 KALTOS (turn 627): HALIBUTT of WIZARD'S WRATH (Visionist, mgr.) DM 6 TRANSEL (turn 627): WHISPER WALK of MY LITTLE TRIBE (Little Whop, mgr.) DM 7 BONSUR (turn 631): EPEE MYSTIQUE of SENTINELS (Nomad, mgr.) DM 10 KOLACT (turn 620): DEIMOS of THE MOONDOGS (Jorja, mgr.) DM 18 TALCAMA (turn 617): SPARE ANCHOR of SEA DOGS (One Armed Bandit, mgr.) DM 21 SUNSET (turn 616): CROUCHING HAMSTER of D.R.I. (?, mgr.) DM 36 JHANS (turn 588): EVA MENDES of GIRLS X3 (Non, mgr.) DM 38 CLIFFHOME (turn 580): GURU GNU of HILLTOP GURUS (Nomad, mgr.) DM 39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 561): DUCK A L'ORANGE of DUCKS UNLIMITED (Crip, mgr.) DM 42 RODEKI (turn 564): MODEL PRISONER of DUNGEON CELL (One Armed Bandit, mgr.) DM 51 TRICORUS (turn 515): UP FROM THE SEA of RAISING R'LYEH (Reaper, mgr.) DM 54 TROCAR (turn 248): RUBBER BULLET of USELESS TOOLS (Crip, mgr.) DM 59 ILLIS (turn 236): GISBORNE of KIWI CONNECTION (The Mun, mgr.) DM 62 VALAMANTIS (turn 464): CAPTAIN SCOURGE of DEATH MOB (Jakari, mgr.) DM 72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 212): SLO-PITCH of SPORTS CRIP PLAYS (?, mgr.) ADM 104 DARKHOLM (turn 508): SUPER BUM of FLAT BROKE (The Muffin Man, mgr.) Top Teams --------- DM 1 MORDANT (turn 626): SWEORDMASTERS (Mannequin, mgr.) DM 2 NIANIA (turn 509): STEEL ARMS (?, mgr.) DM 3 OSKSI (turn 632): GAMES LIBRARY (Jorja, mgr.) DM 5 KALTOS (turn 627): THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (Jorja, mgr.) DM 6 TRANSEL (turn 627): MY LITTLE TRIBE (Little Whop, mgr.) DM 7 BONSUR (turn 631): SENTINELS (Nomad, mgr.) DM 10 KOLACT (turn 620): THE MOONDOGS (Jorja, mgr.) DM 18 TALCAMA (turn 617): SEA DOGS (One Armed Bandit, mgr.) DM 21 SUNSET (turn 616): RAGING LORDS (General Ikillu, mgr.) DM 36 JHANS (turn 588): GIRLS X3 (Non, mgr.) DM 38 CLIFFHOME (turn 580): U.A.K. (Otis the Drunk, mgr.) DM 39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 261): KIWI CONNECTION (The Mun, mgr.) DM 42 RODEKI (turn 564): DUNGEON CELL (One Armed Bandit, mgr.) DM 51 TRICORUS (turn 515): RAISING R'LYEH (Reaper, mgr.) DM 54 TROCAR (turn 248): TRADERS OF TROCAR (Jorja, mgr.) DM 59 ILLIS (turn 236): ISLANDERS (Jorja, mgr.) DM 62 VALAMANTIS (turn 464): DEATH MOB (Jakari, mgr.) DM 72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 212): FEARSOME LEGENDS (?, mgr.) ADM 104 DARKHOLM (turn 508) 0729205R et al (The Muffin Man, mgr.) Recent Graduates ----------------- DM 2 NIANIA (turn 509): GALLORDIN of THE GOLDEN FISH (Jorja, mgr.) DM 7 BONSUR (turn 630): WHOLLY MOLLY of AMEN! (?, mgr.) DM 21 SUNSET (turn 616): CROUCHING HAMSTER of D.R.I. (?, mgr.) (turn 615): SURLY DECKHAND of SEA DOGS (One-Armed Bandit, mgr.) DM 38 CLIFFHOME (turn 580): REDD CORVAIT of JINDA-BAN (Jorja, mgr.) DM 39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 261): DEELA ELLIS of THE MIDDLE WAY (Jorja, mgr.) (turn 260): D'URVILLE of KIWI CONNECTION (The Mun, mgr.) DM 42 RODEKI (turn 563): CHATTY CABALIST of DUNGEON CELL (One Armed Bandit, mgr.) DM 51 TRICORUS (turn 513): HASARCH of DARK HORSEMEN (Jorja, mgr.) DM 54 TROCAR (turn 248): RUBBER BULLET of USELESS TOOLS (Crip, mgr.) A.O. HELL of USELESS TOOLS (Crip, mgr.) REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER Eleven stand-ins participated in a total of twenty-one fights. Dear, dear. There were no challenges, no avoids, no deaths. So let's focus on something more cheerful, shall we? Coyotes! I took my dog for a walk last evening. We walked past a cornfield; the cornstalks have grown taller than I am. And somewhere in or beyond that cornfield, my dog and I heard the coyotes howling. Lots of them. Some of them had very high voices, but I don't think that necessarily means they're babies, does it? Coyotes DO have high voices, right? I couldn't tell how far away they were. Corn distorts sound, everyone knows that. Anyway, so my dog--who generally roams ahead of me and to the sides--decided that she would be a very civilized dog and walk beside me. Very close beside me. I kept almost tripping over her. So as soon as we got to the edge of town, we turned around and gave them a rousing howl. I howled. My faithful companion gave me a dismissive glance. Dogs aren't impressed when humans howl. Anyway, tonight when we went for our walk, I carried a quarterstaff. Nothing like a big hard stick to make you feel overconfident. Ah... well, I suppose I should mention a few fights. SUPER BUM (82-18411) (112-50-2,486) of FLAT BROKE fought GATEWAY (82-15631) (57-50- 1,242) of ATTACK OF THE CLONES. SUPER BUM unbelievably bested GATEWAY in a crowd pleasing 2 minute Title fight. Mr. Bum is still our top Total Parry. For all that he's a TP, Super Bum is clearly no scum. But there ARE warriors working hard for the title of "best scum." Crack is Cheap dragged his fight with Crysoprase out for six minutes. For all the recognition he earned. *sigh* CRACK IS CHEAP (82- 18422) (71-88-0,203) of NEGATIVE CASH FLOW fought CRYSOPRASE (1-3266) (76-94-2,173) of ILLFANG PACT. CRACK IS CHEAP unbelievably bested CRYSOPRASE in an action packed 6 minute duel. You know what that was worth? Two points! At least he got a win. With seventeen more fights like that, he'll be able to claim a winning record again. Oddly, Mr. Cheap and Crysoprase claimed the titles of Overall Popularity Leader and This Turn's favorite, respectively. There were a couple of four-minute fights. Both were exactly four minutes and twenty-two seconds, so they are tied for second longest fight this turn. * ONE A DAY (98-799) (111-57-4,385) of MY DRUGS fought ??RADAR?? (82-20310) (45-72- 1,210) of DYSLEXICS UNTIE! II. ONE A DAY subdued ??RADAR?? in an exciting 4 minute melee. ??RadaR?? is our top Wall of Steel warrior. Mmm! * COOLER (82-7277) (94-94-1,201) of STYROFOAM fought RED FUSION (6-5480) (91-65- 0,187) of IT'S NEW!. COOLER was luckily beaten by RED FUSION in a crowd pleasing 4 minute gory match. Cooler is our Top Slasher, despite getting beaten. This time, Miami Mia was able to fight a Bookie's Guard instead of a Drunken Fisherman. MIAMI MIA (7-4818) (26-73-3,50) of BEACH BABES fought BOOKIE'S GUARD (104-5) (35-18-0,75) of COMMISSION SPECIALS. MIAMI MIA was demolished by BOOKIE'S GUARD in a 1 minute one-sided fight. Well, what do you say? Like this one better? 21 fights... 11 stand-ins... which means 31 actual Lord Protectors competed this turn. So, we have not yet reached the situation where anyone appears on both the popularity and unpopularity lists. I'll let you know when we reach that schizophrenic pass. I think I have said more than enough, and so I'll leave you to enjoy your summer for the next two weeks. Don't forget sunblock! Desiree KEEPER OF THE RUNEBLADE W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY SUPER BUM 82-18411 113 50 2 496 FLAT BROKE (1184) DWES EG GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY ONE A DAY 98-799 112 57 4 393 MY DRUGS (1179) SYVYN'S HILL HE HATE ME 18-7820 107 65 2 318 WASTELAND (468) TALCAMA ETCHED IN STONE 61-3112 145 50 1 233 CEMENTIA (1112) JURINE THAT GUY 97-2120 39 22 3 214 DIE, MOFO, DIE IV (1293) SHADOW GROVE STUPID SEXY FLANDE 42-3836 90 62 0 212 I'M SO SEXY (1072) RODEKI MANUTE BOL 5-4233 73 62 0 212 LARGE LOSERS (1228) KALTOS GRAND CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY PTI 7-5412 121 42 0 210 WASTELAND II (500) BONSUR TASTY HANGNAIL 7-5463 100 59 0 210 WASTELAND II (500) BONSUR GATEWAY 82-15631 57 51 1 210 ATTACK OF THE CLONES (1254 DWES EG PSYCHO GRANDMA! 16-5120 56 25 1 210 LOOK OUT! (1278) WILLAF ??RADAR?? 82-20310 45 73 1 210 DYSLEXICS UNTIE! II (1258) DWES EG GREASY NAPKINS 82-10156 35 41 0 210 REAL PIZZA FLAVOR (1286) DWES EG LITTLEST TYRANT 82--9646 24 5 0 210 THE NEPHEW (1322) DWES EG 5 GOT PICKED 41-4199 60 26 2 207 072905R (1273) KATI-TEI HEAT 98-981 77 63 4 206 WHAT A TREAT (1201) SYVYN'S HILL CRACK IS CHEAP 82-18422 72 88 0 205 NEGATIVE CASH FLOW (1197) DWES EG VISTA BLOWS 18-9258 53 31 1 205 WASTELAND (468) TALCAMA RED FUSION 6-5480 92 65 0 202 IT'S NEW! (1195) TRANSEL SMELL CAREFULLY 18-8889 41 74 2 202 STREET PIZZA (114) TALCAMA COOLER 82-7277 94 95 1 198 STYROFOAM (1090) DWES EG HAILSTORM 7-5698 83 33 1 192 WASTELAND II (500) BONSUR GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY STASSIA 37-1523 62 80 2 180 UP TO NO GOOD (316) SIBIKHAS WORK IN PROGRESS 38-4193 45 165 2 180 JUST BECAUSE (1151) CLIFFHOME CRYSOPRASE 1-3266 76 95 2 178 ILLFANG PACT (281) MORDANT ALOHA ALICE 7-4867 34 63 0 178 BEACH BABES (1058) BONSUR GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY LAGUNA LIL 7-5681 28 71 0 166 BEACH BABES (1058) BONSUR GRAND ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY -GEN. JACKSON 6-6285 22 12 2 141 THE VOLS (1314) TRANSEL MEN WORKING 38-4189 46 164 1 137 JUST BECAUSE (1151) CLIFFHOME GRAND INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY TALLAHASSE TINA 7-4889 27 87 0 90 BEACH BABES (1058) BONSUR BEACH BETTY 7-5768 33 60 0 72 BEACH BABES (1058) BONSUR MIAMI MIA 7-4818 26 74 3 51 BEACH BABES (1058) BONSUR '-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn. THE DEAD W L K TEAM NAME SLAIN BY TURN PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE Vista Blows -- And your point is? -- Aloha Alice Manute Bol -- Time to start living up to your team name and losing big time. -- Laguna Lil That stupid Drunken Fisherman again. -- Beach Betty What the heck? The Cocky Spectator starts out with NO recognition? He's a pest, but it's still a tough row for him. -- Tallahasse Tina And another Drunken Fisherman -- Miami Mia P.S. In his condition, he wouldn't last five minutes off Miami. The fishing here at Willow Beach has been poor lately--it's the recession, you know. The fish are all out looking for jobs. Therefore, the fishermen have nothing to do but lie around in their boats and drink. Psycho Grandma -- I've never liked grandmothers. My own grandmother used to feed us poisoned cookies. -- Stassia Crack is Cheap -- Impressive scumming. -- Crysoprase LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS SUPER BUM unbelievably bested GATEWAY in a crowd pleasing 2 minute Title fight. ONE A DAY subdued ??RADAR?? in a exciting 4 minute melee. PTI was overpowered by FERD THE TOWER in a crowd pleasing 2 minute mismatched duel. HAILSTORM was overpowered by BLIND BEGGAR in a 1 minute mismatched match. ETCHED IN STONE vanquished GREASY NAPKINS in a exciting 1 minute mismatched fight. HE HATE ME handily defeated DIRK CHOLERA in a action packed 1 minute uneven fight. 5 GOT PICKED lost to SOLACIA in a action packed 3 minute gory duel. VISTA BLOWS lost to SOLACIA in a popular 1 minute duel. SMELL CAREFULLY was defeated by THAT GUY in a action packed 3 minute match. STUPID SEXY FLANDERS overpowered LAGUNA LIL in a 1 minute one-sided fight. PSYCHO GRANDMA! was demolished by FERD THE TOWER in a 1 minute mismatched competition. COOLER was luckily beaten by RED FUSION in a crowd pleasing 4 minute gory match. TASTY HANGNAIL was handily defeated by FERD THE TOWER in a 2 minute conflict. CRACK IS CHEAP unbelievably bested CRYSOPRASE in a action packed 6 minute duel. LITTLEST TYRANT savagely defeated STASSIA in a crowd pleasing 3 minute bloody brawl. HEAT defeated WORK IN PROGRESS in a exciting 1 minute bout. MANUTE BOL overpowered ALOHA ALICE in a popular 1 minute bloody one-sided bout. MEN WORKING viciously subdued CAPTURED CUTPURSE in a popular 3 minute gory contest. BEACH BETTY lost to BOOKIE'S GUARD in a popular 1 minute gruesome match. TALLAHASSE TINA vanquished DEBBY TONTE in a popular 1 minute mismatched fray. MIAMI MIA was demolished by BOOKIE'S GUARD in a 1 minute one-sided fight. BATTLE REPORT MOST POPULAR RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS |FIGHTING STYLE FIGHTS FIGHTING STYLE W - L - K PERCENT| |AIMED BLOW 8 AIMED BLOW 85 - 38 - 1 69 | |TOTAL PARRY 7 TOTAL PARRY 51 - 24 - 1 68 | |LUNGING ATTACK 6 LUNGING ATTACK 41 - 35 - 2 54 | |WALL OF STEEL 3 PARRY-RIPOSTE 7 - 13 - 0 35 | |PARRY-RIPOSTE 2 STRIKING ATTACK 3 - 7 - 0 30 | |BASHING ATTACK 2 SLASHING ATTACK 3 - 7 - 0 30 | |PARRY-STRIKE 2 PARRY-STRIKE 5 - 15 - 0 25 | |SLASHING ATTACK 1 WALL OF STEEL 10 - 30 - 0 25 | |PARRY-LUNGE 0 BASHING ATTACK 3 - 22 - 0 12 | |STRIKING ATTACK 0 PARRY-LUNGE 0 - 0 - 0 0 | Turn 509 was great if you Not so great if you used The fighting styles of the used the fighting styles: the fighting styles: top eleven warriors are: TOTAL PARRY 6 - 1 AIMED BLOW 3 - 5 4 TOTAL PARRY PARRY-RIPOSTE 1 - 1 LUNGING ATTACK 2 - 4 4 AIMED BLOW BASHING ATTACK 1 - 1 PARRY-LUNGE 0 - 0 3 LUNGING ATTACK PARRY-STRIKE 0 - 2 SLASHING ATTACK 0 - 1 STRIKING ATTACK 0 - 0 WALL OF STEEL 0 - 3 TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME TOTAL PARRY SUPER BUM 82-18411 113 50 2 496 FLAT BROKE (1184) LUNGING ATTACK HE HATE ME 18-7820 107 65 2 318 WASTELAND (468) AIMED BLOW STUPID SEXY FLAND 42-3836 90 62 0 212 I'M SO SEXY (1072) WALL OF STEEL ??RADAR?? 82-20310 45 73 1 210 DYSLEXICS UNTIE! II (1258) SLASHING ATTACK COOLER 82-7277 94 95 1 198 STYROFOAM (1090) PARRY-RIPOSTE WORK IN PROGRESS 38-4193 45 165 2 180 JUST BECAUSE (1151) PARRY-STRIKE CRYSOPRASE 1-3266 76 95 2 178 ILLFANG PACT (281) BASHING ATTACK LAGUNA LIL 7-5681 28 71 0 166 BEACH BABES (1058) The overall popularity leader is CRACK IS CHEAP 82-18422. The most popular warrior this turn was CRYSOPRASE 1-3266. The ten other most popular fighters were COOLER 82-7277, ??RADAR?? 82-20310, SMELL CAREFULLY 18-8889, LITTLEST TYRANT 82--9646, GATEWAY 82-15631, MEN WORKING 38-4189, ONE A DAY 98-799, CRACK IS CHEAP 82-18422, 5 GOT PICKED 41-4199, and RED FUSION 6-5480. The least popular fighter this week was MIAMI MIA 7-4818. The other ten least popular fighters were ALOHA ALICE 7-4867, LAGUNA LIL 7-5681, WORK IN PROGRESS 38-4193, PSYCHO GRANDMA! 16-5120, GREASY NAPKINS 82-10156, HAILSTORM 7-5698, BEACH BETTY 7-5768, PTI 7-5412, TALLAHASSE TINA 7-4889, and STASSIA 37-1523. Arena (Number) W L K Arena (Number) W L K Arena (Number) W L K MORDANT(1) 0 1 0 TALCAMA(18) 1 2 0 JURINE(61) 1 0 0 KALTOS(5) 1 0 0 SIBIKHAS(37) 0 1 0 DWES EG(82) 3 4 0 TRANSEL(6) 1 0 0 CLIFFHOME(38) 1 1 0 SHADOW GROVE(97) 1 0 0 BONSUR(7) 1 7 0 KATI-TEI(41) 0 1 0 SYVYN'S HILL(98) 2 0 0 WILLAF(16) 0 1 0 RODEKI(42) 1 0 0 TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY CRYSOPRASE 1-3266 76 95 2 178 ILLFANG PACT (281) MORDANT MANUTE BOL 5-4233 73 62 0 212 LARGE LOSERS (1228) KALTOS RED FUSION 6-5480 92 65 0 202 IT'S NEW! (1195) TRANSEL PTI 7-5412 121 42 0 210 WASTELAND II (500) BONSUR PSYCHO GRANDMA! 16-5120 56 25 1 210 LOOK OUT! (1278) WILLAF HE HATE ME 18-7820 107 65 2 318 WASTELAND (468) TALCAMA STASSIA 37-1523 62 80 2 180 UP TO NO GOOD (316) SIBIKHAS TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY WORK IN PROGRESS 38-4193 45 165 2 180 JUST BECAUSE (1151) CLIFFHOME 5 GOT PICKED 41-4199 60 26 2 207 072905R (1273) KATI-TEI STUPID SEXY FLANDE 42-3836 90 62 0 212 I'M SO SEXY (1072) RODEKI ETCHED IN STONE 61-3112 145 50 1 233 CEMENTIA (1112) JURINE SUPER BUM 82-18411 113 50 2 496 FLAT BROKE (1184) DWES EG THAT GUY 97-2120 39 22 3 214 DIE, MOFO, DIE IV (1293) SHADOW GROVE ONE A DAY 98-799 112 57 4 393 MY DRUGS (1179) SYVYN'S HILL