DARKHOLM SPORTING JOURNAL

Date   : 05/19/2012    Duedate: 06/01/2012

DARKHOLM ARENA

DM 104    TURN 584

RANK TEAMS                 W    L   K    %  RANK TEAMS                 W    L   K    % 
  1 PUNCHLINES 82/1115  2201 1733  23 55.9    3 ILLFANG PACT 1/281   484  660   9 42.3
    STREET PIZZA 18/114                       4 STORM RIDERS 1/1056  560 1014   7 35.6
    HANNAH'S PALS 82/1270                       BLOOD + ORANGES 51/518
    DYSLEXICS UNTIE! II 82/1258                 STORM RIDERS II 1/1057
  2 AESIR 3/301          349  324   3 51.9      THE MIDDLE WAY 5 5/1325
    SHREDDERS 42/1337                         5 JOHNS 5/927         1210 2227  21 35.2
    TACKLE BOX 6/1332                           AUTHORS 21/749
    THE FUNNY FARM 2/881                        JUST BECAUSE 38/1151
    VENTURE BROS. 51/1340                       THE LADY'S LIST 6/917

                                  WARRIOR SPOTLIGHT

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                         ---===DELARQUAN REGIONAL NEWS===---

                                     Duelmasters
                                     -----------
 DM   1 MORDANT (turn 701): WHISKEY of BOOZE (Papa Bear, mgr.)
 DM   2 NIANIA (turn 584): CHAKTIRI of HAMOI TONG (Froot E. Bowl, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 706): HYPE MACHINE of GENERATION X (Storm Lord, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 678): KAI-GAN of SAVAGE HORDE (Hawk, mgr.)
 DM   5 KALTOS (turn 702): WATSON of TECHNOLOGY (Otto X, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 697): SWEET FREDDY of PSYCHO SQUAD (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 706): SAW HORSE of TOOL SHED (Leprechaun, mgr.)
 DM  10 KOLACT (turn 690): ULF SUNDERHELM of VIKINGS (Nomad, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 692): DERRY DARLIN of RYAN'S HENCHMEN (Leprechaun, mgr.)
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 691): RAZE of GRIM FANDANGO (Stik, mgr.)
 DM  36 JHANS (turn 657): KHYLAR of WRATHMEN (Kharadmon, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 646): UNCUT HARE of HOLMES ON THE RANGE (Sherlock, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 299): ASQUITH of KIWI CONNECTION (The Mun, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 639): SOCKLESS CRITIC of COLOR ME SUAVE (Suave, mgr.)
 DM  51 TRICORUS (turn 590): DEAN of VENTURE BROS. (Buri, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 280): TONG PAK FU of ASIAN INVASION (Pec Killer, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 273): APPLESEED of IMPROVED ILLUSION (Master Darque, mgr.)
 DM  62 VALAMANTIS (turn 535): MOOSEHEAD of FLOYD'S BREWERY (Floyd, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 250): FILING FEE of BASH BROS LAWYERS (Assurnasirbanipal)
ADM 104 DARKHOLM (turn 583): RUGEN THE JELLYFISH of HANNAH'S PALS (The Upright Man)

                                      Top Teams
                                      ---------
 DM   1 MORDANT (turn 701): HOMICIDAL MANIACS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM   2 NIANIA (turn 584): HAMOI TONG (Froot E. Bowl, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 706): GENERATION X (Storm Lord, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 678): SAVAGE HORDE (Hawk, mgr.)
 DM   5 KALTOS (turn 702): TECHNOLOGY (Otto X, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 697): PSYCHO SQUAD (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 706): BEACH BABES (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  10 KOLACT (turn 690): VIKINGS (Nomad, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 692): SHEPHERDS (Assurnasirbanipal, mgr.)
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 691): GRIM FANDANGO (Stik, mgr.)
 DM  36 JHANS (turn 657): SERPPENTS HOLD (Khisanth, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 646): JINDA-BAN (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 299): KIWI CONNECTION (The Mun, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 639): COLOR ME SUAVE (Suave, mgr.)
 DM  51 TRICORUS (turn 590): VENTURE BROS. (Buri, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 280): KIWI CONNECTION II (The Mun, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 273): IMPROVED ILLUSION (Master Darque, mgr.)
 DM  62 VALAMANTIS (turn 535): MIDDLE WAY 10 (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 250): MIDDLE WAY 9 (Jorja, mgr.)
ADM 104 DARKHOLM (turn 583) PUNCHLINES et al (The Upright Man, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
                                  -----------------
 DM   2 NIANIA (turn 584): CHAKTIRI of HAMOI TONG (Froot E. Bowl, mgr.)
                           TASAIO of HAMOI TONG (Froot E. Bowl, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 705): VIPER of SERPENTS HOLD (Khisanth, mgr.)
                          STARKAD of AESIR (Buri, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 677): DARKCLAW of SAVAGE HORDE (Hawk, mgr.)
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 690): SLEDGEHEAD of TOOL SHED (Leprechaun, mgr.)
 DM  36 JHANS (turn 657): KHYLAR of WRATHMEN (Kharadmon, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 646): UNCUT HARE of HOLMES ON THE RANGE (Sherlock, mgr.)
                  (turn 645): KEVSILESSA KIRO of JINDA-BAN (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 298): FALLON GRIMM of THE MIDDLE WAY (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 273): G W BUSH of TALL TALES (A-Sop, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 249): LOUIE MURH of MIDDLE WAY 9 (Jorja, mgr.)

                             REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER

Hello there!

     Our featured fighter for today is Constable Durk Prackins, who volunteered for
two fights in which a good match could not be found among the actual gladiators.  We
also saw an appearance by a captured cutpurse, and the mysterious M. Chardinee.  But
Constable Prackins is famous for getting his helmet nicked, you know.  There's a
trick to it.  When he's looking one way, you tiptoe up to him from behind... and this
takes some serious delicacy and coordination because there is a chin strap.  Place
the fingertips of one hand under the back of the helmet and lift sharply.  This will
cause the constable's head to tip forward.  At the same time, the other hand slips a
finger under the chin strap and slips it forward.  You want a smallish chin in order
for this to work well, which is why Constable Prackins is a good target.  Unlike some
of the constables over in Talahya... anyway, the chin strap comes off the chin, and
then in one smooth motion, lift the helmet from his head, turn, and run for your
life!  It's a thrilling sport.  Not that I've ever done it.

     RUGEN THE JELLYFISH (82-12478) (83-26-0,326) of HANNAH'S PALS fought ZAKAU (5-
4623) (44-44-0,190) of JOHNS.  RUGEN THE JELLYFISH devastated ZAKAU in a 1 minute
mismatched Title fight.  Rugen is quite good, isn't he?  And top Lunger.
     HAIR LIP! (82-3261) (27-19-1,261) of PUNCHLINES fought CRYSOPRASE (1-3266) (111-
134-3,204) of ILLFANG PACT.  HAIR LIP! was subdued by CRYSOPRASE in an exciting 1
minute melee.  I believe this means that once again, Crysoprase is back up in the
Grand Challenger Champs, but it looks like she can depend on Rugen to save her from
writing a column.  She is our top Parry-Striker though.
     ??RADAR?? (82-20310) (92-100-1,226) of DYSLEXICS UNTIE! II fought LOCAL
CONSTABLE (104-22) (0-0-0,181) of  WASTELAND.  ??RADAR?? overpowered LOCAL CONSTABLE
in a crowd pleasing 3 minute mismatched duel.  Naturally, ??Radar?? is our overall
popularity leader--and top Wall of Steel, which seems to be a very popular style to
the spectators.  I like it, myself.  Lots of action, swords whirling... I could do
without the blood spraying, though.  The Constable made a decent show of it, as well.
He wore a helmet provided by the arena, of course.  Not the nickable kind.
     SMELL CAREFULLY (18-8889) (75-114-2,228) of STREET PIZZA fought LOCAL CONSTABLE
(104-22) (0-0-0,181) of  WASTELAND.  SMELL CAREFULLY overpowered LOCAL CONSTABLE in a
1 minute mismatched match.  This was Constable Prackins' second loss of the day, and
by the end of it you could tell he wasn't volunteering for a third.  However, it was
very public-spirited of him to do it twice.
     Well, we had a rather short day of fights--only 19 of them in all.  So there's
not a lot to say.  But it was fun.  Till next time, cheerio!

Malic of Talcama

KEEPER OF THE RUNEBLADE        W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 RUGEN THE JELLYFISH 82-12478 84  26     334  HANNAH'S PALS (1270)       DWES EG

GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 SMELL CAREFULLY 18-8889      76 114  2  236  STREET PIZZA (114)         TALCAMA
 ??RADAR?? 82-20310           93 100  1  234  DYSLEXICS UNTIE! II (1258) DWES EG
 ELAYRON 51-1492              80  60     215  BLOOD + ORANGES (518)      TRICORUS
 CRYSOPRASE 1-3266           112 134  3  214  ILLFANG PACT (281)         MORDANT

GRAND CHAMPIONS                W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 SPUTTERBUZZ 6-5810           27  16     200  TACKLE BOX (1332)          TRANSEL
 ZAKAU 5-4623                 44  45     198  JOHNS (927)                KALTOS
 HAIR LIP! 82-3261            27  20  1  196  PUNCHLINES (1115)          DWES EG
 TASHI'SINDAR 1-3249          72  54  3  184  STORM RIDERS II (1057)     MORDANT

GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS        W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 MEN WORKING 38-4189          64 221  1  179  JUST BECAUSE (1151)        CLIFFHOME
 MARK 5-4088                  56 132  3  179  JOHNS (927)                KALTOS
 HIKARAN DAAL 1-2070          73  89     174  STORM RIDERS (1056)        MORDANT
 JAMMY LARKE 5-4926           43  31     164  THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (1325)    KALTOS

GRAND ADEPTS                   W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 HELENE JUSTE 5-4875          28  39  1  139  THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (1325)    KALTOS
 MIKEL 6-6190                 28  27  2  134  THE LADY'S LIST (917)      TRANSEL
 ZANE GREY 21-4810            31  65  2  130  AUTHORS (749)              SUNSET
 LENNON 5-4087                31  26  1  119  JOHNS (927)                KALTOS
 JUSTIN 6-6179                22  36  3  103  THE LADY'S LIST (917)      TRANSEL

GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 CLIVE 6-5215                 37  36  5   91  THE LADY'S LIST (917)      TRANSEL
 FLASHER 6-6556               18   8  1   91  TACKLE BOX (1332)          TRANSEL

GRAND INITIATES                W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 HENDRIX 42-4594              17   6      89  SHREDDERS (1337)           RODEKI
 SATCHEL 6-6215               31  30  2   85  THE LADY'S LIST (917)      TRANSEL
 HANK 51-5574                 19   2  4   80  VENTURE BROS. (1340)       TRICORUS
 KVASIR 3-7165                19   2  1   75  AESIR (301)                OSKSI
 JERI LOUGH 5-4840            33  53      70  THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (1325)    KALTOS
 SRV 42-4593                  15   5  1   69  SHREDDERS (1337)           RODEKI
 PENDRU ROST 5-4956           28  72      60  THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (1325)    KALTOS
 KATIRONA MURH 5-4929         45  35  2   57  THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (1325)    KALTOS
 2 + 2 = 4 38-4190            45 140      48  JUST BECAUSE (1151)        CLIFFHOME
 ALOYICIUS 6-5045             21  34  2   45  THE LADY'S LIST (917)      TRANSEL
 HOFFA 5-4622                 34  55      43  JOHNS (927)                KALTOS
 HOFFA 5-4299                 17  61      42  JOHNS (927)                KALTOS
 HOFFA 5-4348                 12 131      35  JOHNS (927)                KALTOS
 BIG BIRD 2-5703              16  16  2   34  THE FUNNY FARM (881)       NIANIA

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                   W   L  K TEAM NAME              SLAIN BY                  TURN

                               PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE

Rugen the Jellyfish -- Well, according to the spyreporter, you saved me from having
to write a column.  So, thank you!-- Crysoprase

     Amazing the things one can find to be grateful about.

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

RUGEN THE JELLYFISH devastated ZAKAU in a 1 minute mismatched Title fight.
HAIR LIP! was subdued by CRYSOPRASE in a exciting 1 minute melee.
??RADAR?? overpowered LOCAL CONSTABLE in a crowd pleasing 3 minute mismatched duel.
SMELL CAREFULLY overpowered LOCAL CONSTABLE in a 1 minute mismatched match.
ELAYRON overpowered MARK in a crowd pleasing 1 minute one-sided struggle.
TASHI'SINDAR was overcome by SPUTTERBUZZ in a action packed 3 minute fight.
HIKARAN DAAL vanquished LENNON in a 1 minute uneven duel.
MEN WORKING vanquished HELENE JUSTE in a action packed 1 minute uneven fight.
JAMMY LARKE overpowered ZANE GREY in a action packed 1 minute one-sided fight.
MIKEL beat CAPTURED CUTPURSE in a 1 minute fight.
JUSTIN was demolished by M. CHARDINEE in a crowd pleasing 1 minute mismatched match.
FLASHER devastated PENDRU ROST in a 2 minute one-sided battle.
HENDRIX bested ALOYICIUS in a crowd pleasing 1 minute bout.
CLIVE handily defeated BIG BIRD in a 1 minute uneven fight.
KATIRONA MURH was overpowered by SATCHEL in a action packed 1 minute uneven struggle.
SRV overpowered 2 + 2 = 4 in a crowd pleasing 2 minute gory mismatched brawl.
JERI LOUGH beat HOFFA in a exciting 2 minute match.
HOFFA was overpowered by HANK in a crowd pleasing 1 minute one-sided match.
HOFFA was devastated by KVASIR in a 1 minute one-sided contest.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|SLASHING ATTACK                  7         PARRY-RIPOSTE      9 -   1 -  0      90  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   6         AIMED BLOW         4 -   1 -  0      80  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    5         LUNGING ATTACK    35 -  20 -  0      64  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      4         PARRY-STRIKE       6 -   4 -  1      60  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      4         PARRY-LUNGE       15 -  15 -  0      50  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   3         SLASHING ATTACK   37 -  37 -  1      50  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  2         TOTAL PARRY       19 -  22 -  0      46  |
|AIMED BLOW                       1         WALL OF STEEL     24 -  34 -  0      41  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     1         BASHING ATTACK    10 -  19 -  0      34  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    1         STRIKING ATTACK    5 -  21 -  0      19  |

Turn 584 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

AIMED BLOW         1 -  0     WALL OF STEEL      2 -  3         4  LUNGING ATTACK 
PARRY-STRIKE       1 -  0     STRIKING ATTACK    0 -  2         2  PARRY-LUNGE    
PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -  0                                       1  WALL OF STEEL  
BASHING ATTACK     2 -  1                                       1  PARRY-STRIKE   
SLASHING ATTACK    4 -  3                                       1  TOTAL PARRY    
PARRY-LUNGE        2 -  2                                       1  SLASHING ATTACK
LUNGING ATTACK     3 -  3                                       1  BASHING ATTACK 
TOTAL PARRY        2 -  2     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
LUNGING ATTACK   RUGEN THE JELLYF 82-12478  84  26  0  334 HANNAH'S PALS (1270)
WALL OF STEEL    ??RADAR?? 82-20310         93 100  1  234 DYSLEXICS UNTIE! II (1258)
PARRY-LUNGE      ELAYRON 51-1492            80  60  0  215 BLOOD + ORANGES (518)
PARRY-STRIKE     CRYSOPRASE 1-3266         112 134  3  214 ILLFANG PACT (281)
TOTAL PARRY      SPUTTERBUZZ 6-5810         27  16  0  200 TACKLE BOX (1332)
SLASHING ATTACK  HAIR LIP! 82-3261          27  20  1  196 PUNCHLINES (1115)

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
BASHING ATTACK   MEN WORKING 38-4189        64 221  1  179 JUST BECAUSE (1151)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    JAMMY LARKE 5-4926         43  31  0  164 THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (1325)
STRIKING ATTACK  HELENE JUSTE 5-4875        28  39  1  139 THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (1325)
AIMED BLOW       FLASHER 6-6556             18   8  1   91 TACKLE BOX (1332)

The overall popularity leader is ??RADAR?? 82-20310.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was TASHI'SINDAR 1-3249.  The ten other most popular fighters were ??RADAR?? 
82-20310, JERI LOUGH 5-4840, SMELL CAREFULLY 18-8889, SRV 42-4593, CRYSOPRASE 1-3266, 
HAIR LIP! 82-3261, MEN WORKING 38-4189, FLASHER 6-6556, RUGEN THE JELLYFISH 82-12478, 
and ELAYRON 51-1492.

The least popular fighter this week was HOFFA 5-4299.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were BIG BIRD 2-5703, LENNON 5-4087, HOFFA 5-4348, HOFFA 5-4622, 2 + 2 = 4 
38-4190, KATIRONA MURH 5-4929, CLIVE 6-5215, JUSTIN 6-6179, HELENE JUSTE 5-4875, and 
ZAKAU 5-4623.

Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  
MORDANT(1)           2  1 0  TRANSEL(6)           5  2 0  RODEKI(42)           2  0 0  
NIANIA(2)            0  1 0  TALCAMA(18)          1  0 0  TRICORUS(51)         2  0 0  
OSKSI(3)             1  0 0  SUNSET(21)           0  1 0  DWES EG(82)          2  1 0  
KALTOS(5)            2  9 0  CLIFFHOME(38)        1  1 0  

TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 CRYSOPRASE 1-3266          112 134  3  214  ILLFANG PACT (281)         MORDANT
 BIG BIRD 2-5703             16  16  2   34  THE FUNNY FARM (881)       NIANIA
 KVASIR 3-7165               19   2  1   75  AESIR (301)                OSKSI
 ZAKAU 5-4623                44  45  0  198  JOHNS (927)                KALTOS
 SPUTTERBUZZ 6-5810          27  16  0  200  TACKLE BOX (1332)          TRANSEL
 SMELL CAREFULLY 18-8889     76 114  2  236  STREET PIZZA (114)         TALCAMA
 ZANE GREY 21-4810           31  65  2  130  AUTHORS (749)              SUNSET
 MEN WORKING 38-4189         64 221  1  179  JUST BECAUSE (1151)        CLIFFHOME
 HENDRIX 42-4594             17   6  0   89  SHREDDERS (1337)           RODEKI
 ELAYRON 51-1492             80  60  0  215  BLOOD + ORANGES (518)      TRICORUS
 RUGEN THE JELLYFI 82-12478  84  26  0  334  HANNAH'S PALS (1270)       DWES EG