AD

Date   : 06/16/2008    Duedate: 06/28/2008

ANDORAK

DM-105    TURN-481

RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %  RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %
  1 SUPERIOR FOR 45/1030  583  391  2 59.9      DARK SIDE 43/970                      
  2 KELLUMBO'S KIDS 26/9  494  332  9 59.8    4 PUERCO'S PINA 53/669  485  393  5 55.2
    KELLUMBO'S KIDS 82/1045                     ANDORIAN UNIVERSITY 66/846            
    KELLUMBO'S KIDS 22/978                      GERFEL'S FRIENDS 11/396               
  3 TACO GODS 40/198     1147  828 19 58.1    5 X-FORCE 66/415       1496 2027 18 42.5
    THAT TOTALLY SUCKS! 82/993                  DRAGONBALL Z 46/944                   
    POSITIVELY PUTRID 71/940                    SCARLET KNIGHTS II 11/994             
    DEATH STUDS VII 60/877                      SCARLET KNIGHTS 11/902                
    SAILS OF CHARON 63/1013                     RUBY DRAGONS 46/1006                  
    DEATH BY STUPIDITY 4/935                  6 GOLDEN CANYON 26/741  589 1020  9 36.6
    DIAMONDS & RUST 68/820                    7 MIKES 14/831          381  702 11 35.2

    '##/###' Avoid teams by their Team Id     '-'  Team did not fight this turn

                                  WARRIOR SPOTLIGHT

        + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ The Andorian Succession #7 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +

On the Isle of the Eye:

     "Four steps and we're lost," Senator Sedalia muttered.  "This is worse than
politics."
     "They do say that the Isle is larger than the Lake and touches other waters,"
Gissanniah answered.  "What do we do?  Just start walking until we get somewhere--
anywhere?"
     "It may come to that, but I'm not ready to give up yet."  The senator looked
around again.  "Hmm.  How about if I stand still, right here, and we hold hands--no,
that might not give us enough distance."  He undid his necktie and handed one end to
his companion.  "I'll stand here and hold my end, you go out to the farthest end of
the tie and your arm--no fear of it breaking, silk is very strong--and walk around me
in a wide circle.  We haven't come so far as all that.  You should be able to reach
the edge of the woods at some point on that circle.  Then you stand still and tug on
the tie until I join you."  Of course, it was possible that the edge of the woods was
no longer four steps away, or that any edge they found would be the one they'd come
from.  You could never tell, with magic.  But since neither he nor Gissanniah could
do anything about those possibilities, the senator saw no point in mentioning them.

Convincia:

     "That's a big fire," Lenpro said.
     Fandil squinted ahead.  It was certainly a lot of smoke.  "Maybe... they're
burning brush in the fields before planting?" he suggested.
     "Late in the season to plant."
     "It's been a wet spring, planting has been delayed in a lot of places."
     "Maybe," Lenpro said, "but that smoke is rising over the city of Tarrgir.  It
might be buildings burning, instead of brush."
     "If that's so, perhaps we can help them put the fire out," Fandil said.  He
urged his horse to a faster pace.
     "If they want the fires put out," Lenpro muttered.  "I have a feeling about
this."

Andor:

     Herlas backed up two steps before he even thought about it.  "You can't parade
that golem through the streets and claim it's the king!"
     Hesselbod raised his eyebrows.  "Of course we can."  He gestured at the golem
who stood obediently, dressed in royal garments and awaiting a command.  "The artist
who modeled the face and figure has caught the appearance of the last king quite
well, the artificer who constructed the golem was the best Lord Korneth could hire,
and with your magic to cast a glamor over the whole, no one will doubt that this
truly is the king."
     Herlas gaped in silence for a moment, stunned by the magnitude of Lord Korneth's
ambition and of the royal scribe's misunderstanding.  "The best illusions will not
fool everyone," he said, "and without illusion, that is obviously a golem.  You'll
have a firestorm of outraged citizens--"
     "That is not your concern," Lord Korneth said coldly, entering the room.  He
dismissed the scribe with a flick of his eyes.
     Herlas turned to face him squarely.  He was not afraid of Korneth of Sengir, who
had come from nowehre and styled himself Chief Minister of Andoria, but he was deeply
wary.  There was too much unknown about this man for anyone to feel relaxed around
him, starting with where Sengir might be found and what Korneth wanted with the
Andorian states.  Herlas had thought, originally, that Korneth was driven by a simple
ambition to rule.  Ambition, he could understand, and as the man was no magician,
their goals should not conflict.  Now, though... he wasn't sure.  Ambition, yes, but
not simple.  "Why not produce the real king?" he asked.  "Even drugged or enspelled
to be your puppet, he would be more convincing than that golem."
     Korneth's lip curled in a sneer.  "The 'real king' no longer exists, and he was
pathetic to begin with."  He dismissed the point with a wave of his hand.  "And it is
not your concern.  Do not think to usurp authority to question or command.  Your only
business is to do as you are told.  In this case, to cast the glamor."

On the Isle of the Eye:

     Sedalia waited, holding one end of his tie and turning slowly in place.  He was
fairly sure he was still in the same place.  And beginning to suspect that he had
made more than one complete turn.  Blast these trees!  They all looked alike.
Somewhere out of sight, Gissanniah hesitated.  Not the first time.  What was she
seeing?  The young woman was observant and intelligent, but he wanted to be seeing
for himself.  Still, he shifted his grip to accomodate another turn, she was the more
nimble of the two of them and better suited to dodging around trees.
     Two definite tugs.  The signal.  Senator Sedalia began to follow his silk tie
through the trees.

Tarrgir:

     Half the city was in flames.  The two managers sat their horses on the rise at
the edge of the river valley, looking down at smoke and ruin.
     "At this point, there isn't a thing we could do," Fandil said.  He shook his
head.  "Not even with magic.  They seem to have it under control--not spreading
further, at least--but I can't imagine how it spread so fast!"
     "Arson," Lenpro said.  "Fires started in several places at once."  He squinted
down at the city.  "Looks like the Military Academy was about in the center of the
burned area; it's all gone now."
     "I don't understand how people can do that," Fandil muttered.  "Arson--blind
destruction--"
     Lenpro was silent for a long moment, then started his horse forward and down the
slope.  "Maybe not so blind," he said over his shoulder.  "If someone wanted to
destroy the Andorian League, it looks like there's been a good beginning made."
     Fandil urged his horse to catch up.  "Just burning down the Academy won't--"
     "And driving a wedge between the Aruaki and the normal humans," Lenpro reminded
him.  "And more things, I have no doubt, that we haven't found yet."
     "Who would want to destroy the League, and why?" Fandil demanded.  "Surely even
the Delarquans or the Karnhorns wouldn't--"
     "Why not?" Lenpro asked.  "And there are probably other enemies out there that
we don't happen to know about."

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                          ---===ANDORIAN REGIONAL NEWS===---

                                     Duelmasters
                                     -----------
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 297): UNHOLY TERROR of BLOOD RITES (Wretch, mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 595): CHIEF SITTING BULL of BULLDOGS (Kennelworth, mgr.)
 DM  14 TOBIR (turn 595): STEWART of OTAGO HIGHLANDERS (The Mun, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 588): DONDRIC of KELLUMBO'S KIDS (Detective Kellumbo, mgr.)
 DM  24 ZORPUNT (turn 584): MORLIN POOLE of KRILL CAVALRY (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  25 LYRATILAN (turn 584): KEG STAND of BARHOPPERS (Apex, mgr.)
 DM  26 CALEAM (turn 581): IRIS of MENAGERIE (Ichabod Frothingslosh, mgr.)
 DM  30 IAYE (turn 577): IRISH CREAM of RED DOG GANG (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  40 ZENSU (turn 546): LON CHANEY JR. of MEN OF 1,000 FACES (Mad Max, mgr.)
 DM  41 KATI-TEI (turn 537): RAMBLING OX of WANDERERS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  46 ARDIVENT (turn 528): BANNIR PARK of BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 244): PAINFUL PANSY of FLOWER GIRLS (Lady Fern, mgr.)
 DM  63 AMEN-TEI (turn 430): DIMAGGIO oF 1949 YANKEES (Papa Bear, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 198): TRYPTOPHAN of SUPERIOR FORCES (Manager, mgr.)
ADM 105 ANDORAK (turn 480): AXLY HIMSELF of GERFEL'S FRIENDS (Generalissimo Puerco)

                                      Top Teams
                                      ---------
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 297): CONSANGUINEOUS (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 595): BULLDOGS (Kennelworth, mgr.)
 DM  14 TOBIR (turn 585): ALL THE MUN'S MEN (The Mun, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 588): KELLUMBO'S KIDS (Detective Kellumbo, mgr.)
 DM  24 ZORPUNT (turn 584): MEDAL OF HONOR F3 (The Anarchist, mgr.)
 DM  25 LYRATILAN (turn 584): BARHOPPERS (Apex, mgr.)
 DM  26 CALEAM (turn 581): POSITION IS EMPTY
 DM  30 IAYE (turn 577): RED DOG GANG (Jojra, mgr.)
 DM  40 ZENSU (turn 546): MEDAL OF HONOR G1 (The Anarchist, mgr.)
 DM  41 KATI-TEI (turn 537): WANDERERS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  46 ARDIVENT (turn 528): FANDILS (Wise Old Fandil, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 244): FLOWER GIRLS (Lady Fern, mgr.)
 DM  63 AMEN-TEI (turn 430): 1949 YANKEES (Papa Bear, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 198): THE ZOO (Jorja, mgr.)
ADM 105 ANDORAK (turn 480): SUPERIOR FORCES (Manager, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
                                   ----------------
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 296): HAMMURABI of SMITHSONIAN (Curator, mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 594): WALK THE LINE of ELFQUEST (Armalias, mgr.)
 DM  14 TOBIR (turn 594): MOLYNEUX of OTAGO HIGHLANDERS (The Mun, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 587): CHUCKER ISTTA of MIDDLE WAY 15 (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  24 ZORPUNT (turn 583): MIRESSEA POOLE of KRILL CAVALRY (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  30 IAYE (turn 576): PRIVATE PERNA of LENPROS (Lenpro, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 243): IGOR MALMORT of BLOOD AND GUTS! (Le Pentarque, mgr.)

                             REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER

Another day, another beautiful sunrise.  If you weren't up to see it, I can tell you
that you missed a good one.

Kellumbo's Kids avoided Taco Gods.  Too much cumin in the salsa, no doubt.  That'd
put off a lot of people.

Blackrazor got the most challenges, though what he wants them for I can't imagine.

We had twenty-two fights involving three standbys.  Eight of the fights were
challenge matches, one of them involving a tv challenge.

     FRY GUY (40-3655) (20-10-0,72) of TACO GODS fought OHRLAM (105-2) (0-0-0,60) of
Miscellaneous Staff.  FRY GUY vanquished OHRLAM in a popular 1 minute brutal
mismatched fray.  Do you realize that one observer described fratsfan fries as
"boiled in crease"?  Not a bad description of deep-fat frying, when you get down to
it.  Enough to turn anyone off.
     BABY (43-2863) (25-34-2,62) of DARK SIDE fought GOLDERIE (26-4657) (23-27-1,47)
of GOLDEN CANYON.  BABY was beaten by GOLDERIE in a 2 minute fray.  What Golderie
might make of this when she heads for the kitchen, I can't imagine and don't much
want to.
     FALCON XLI (60-7341) (15-10-3,58) of DEATH STUDS VII fought SOLARIS (46-3759)
(35-84-0,47) of RUBY DRAGONS.  FALCON XLI defeated SOLARIS in a 2 minute brutal duel.
Ah!  Somebody told him that "you can't fly a falcon at the sun," and he had to prove
them wrong.
     HERO, HERO (68-446) (15-37-0,88) of DIAMONDS & RUST fought SARINA (26-4220) (23-
32-1,61) of GOLDEN CANYON.  HERO, HERO devastated SARINA in a 1 minute one-sided
contest.  Let's face it, the cooks from the Golden Canyon just do NOT do sandwiches.
It's almost a phobia.
     OOZING ORIFICES (71-3475) (14-3-0,92) of POSITIVELY PUTRID fought LORIS KEY (26-
4706) (20-25-1,61) of GOLDEN CANYON.  OOZING ORIFICES executed LORIS KEY in a 1
minute mismatched fight.  What a hideous way to go.
     WARDUKE (11-5930) (54-69-3,174) of SCARLET KNIGHTS II fought CLEMMIE (26-4630)
(27-34-1,133) of GOLDEN CANYON.  WARDUKE demolished CLEMMIE in a 1 minute one-sided
bout.  Amazing, eh?
     TEEVELLA (82-24954) (18-2-1,154) of KELLUMBO'S KIDS fought RHYNIAN ALANDA (105-
9) (0-0-0,200) of Miscellaneous Staff.  TEEVELLA was viciously subdued by RHYNIAN
ALANDA in a popular 2 minute brutal brawl.  And who gave the Staff permission to be
brutal?  Not to mention vicious.

     SMITH (14-1282) (91-148-4,207) of MIKES fought WOLVERINE (66-3871) (65-118-
4,187) of X-FORCE.  SMITH vanquished WOLVERINE in a crowd pleasing 1 minute one-sided
fray.  Apparently there is more to this Smith than shows!
     STELLA BLUE (53-6167) (54-28-1,268) of PUERCO'S PINATA fought GOKU (46-3655)
(90-73-2,215) of DRAGONBALL Z.  STELLA BLUE handily defeated GOKU in a popular 1
minute bloody uneven fight.  Blue is the color of the day, determined upon the rising
of the sun and the observation of the cloudlessness of the sky.  I bet you didn't
know that.  But we've had too much rain already.
     VISION (26-1573) (119-53-4,231) of KELLUMBO'S KIDS fought SANDS (11-4123) (67-
134-3,195) of SCARLET KNIGHTS.  VISION subdued SANDS in a popular 3 minute bloody
brawl.  And then left him ON the sands and the maintenance crew raked him out.
     HUMMEL (14-1404) (91-146-6,256) of MIKES fought VAN HELSING (11-6338) (50-54-
1,184) of SCARLET KNIGHTS II.  HUMMEL devastated VAN HELSING in an exciting 1 minute
mismatched conflict.  I have to admit that I wasn't actually excited.
     WHERE'S MY TOURNEY? (82-2893) (27-3-0,254) of THAT TOTALLY SUCKS! fought BERYL
(105-26) (0-0-0,181) of Miscellaneous Staff.  WHERE'S MY TOURNEY? overpowered BERYL
in an exciting 1 minute one-sided fight.  Naturally, because Beryl didn't KNOW where
his tourney was.
     POETIC JUICE (66-2975) (76-46-0,211) of ANDORIAN UNIVERSITY fought JOHN BOBBIT
(4-3769) (42-47-2,191) of DEATH BY STUPIDITY.  POETIC JUICE was defeated by JOHN
BOBBIT in a 2 minute gruesome match.  Perhaps just a tad embarrassing.

The challenges:
     TORNADO CXCVI (60-5111) (17-24-0,112) of DEATH STUDS VII challenged CONNOR
MACLEOD (11-5532) (63-78-0,173) of SCARLET KNIGHTS II.  Up 51.  This is suicidally
bold.  TORNADO CXCVI was vanquished by CONNOR MACLEOD in a 1 minute uneven Challenge
duel.  And in the end, unsurprising.
     NAFISAH (22-6612) (29-15-1,163) of KELLUMBO'S KIDS challenged KHORNE SHADOWSPAWN
(46-3809) (55-59-1,137) of RUBY DRAGONS.  Down 26.  NAFISAH overpowered KHORNE
SHADOWSPAWN in a 1 minute uneven Challenge melee.  Is Janfisah's first name Jimmy?  I
wanted to say "Jinny cracked Khorne," but if that isn't the correct name, it won't
work.
     BLIND GIRL (22-6041) (49-23-0,207) of KELLUMBO'S KIDS challenged BLACKRAZOR (11-
4091) (66-137-1,206) of SCARLET KNIGHTS.  Down 1.  BLIND GIRL beat BLACKRAZOR in a
crowd pleasing 3 minute Challenge brawl.  This is the Most Challenged Blackrazor,
remember!
     GRANDPA RAT (22-6549) (47-24-3,191) of KELLUMBO'S KIDS challenged LUKARIAN
LAMORAK (11-4841) (67-89-1,225) of SCARLET KNIGHTS.  Up 34.  GRANDPA RAT was
viciously subdued by LUKARIAN LAMORAK in a 3 minute Challenge duel.  Some people
don't appreciate the rodents.
     LEADFOOT (40-3516) (29-20-0,197) of TACO GODS challenged VAJRA VALMEJAR (11-
4928) (66-85-0,204) of SCARLET KNIGHTS.  Up 7.  LEADFOOT was overpowered by VAJRA
VALMEJAR in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match.  Too slow off the mark, no doubt.
     SEXTANT (63-2415) (17-12-1,194) of SAILS OF CHARON challenged TALISMAN
SHIELDGUARD (11-4304) (80-109-0,210) of SCARLET KNIGHTS.  Up 16.  SEXTANT was
overpowered by TALISMAN SHIELDGUARD in a 1 minute Challenge duel.  Some things were
not meant to be, Sextant.
     LUCIAS CLAY (22-6359) (57-36-1,316) of KELLUMBO'S KIDS challenged NIXIE
SEASPRITE (11-4992) (66-75-1,184) of SCARLET KNIGHTS.  Down 132.  LUCIAS CLAY won
victory over NIXIE SEASPRITE in a 1 minute Challenge battle.  Let this be a lesson to
Nixie:  Those who just stand around without thought for the morrow become targets.

The tv challenge:
     JACKSON (22-6649) (22-2-0,82) of KELLUMBO'S KIDS TV challenged GO-FER (26-4444) 
(19-35-2,62) of GOLDEN CANYON.  Down 20.  JACKSON devastated GO-FER in a 1 minute
mismatched Challenge fight.  Nobody minds what happens to Go-Fer.

And for the title:
     AXLY HIMSELF (11-2363) (110-73-1,478) of GERFEL'S FRIENDS fought DEATH FOG (45-
4017) (63-28-0,224) of SUPERIOR FORCES.  AXLY HIMSELF vanquished DEATH FOG in a 2
minute one-sided Title duel.  This is good.  We don't need deadly fogs around here,
we've got problems already.

                                       Ardane

THE KING'S SENTINEL           W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 AXLY HIMSELF 11-2363       111  73  1  507  GERFEL'S FRIENDS (396)     ARUAK CITY

GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS    W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 LUCIAS CLAY 22-6359         58  36  1  318  KELLUMBO'S KIDS (978)      SOLVEN
 STELLA BLUE 53-6167         55  28  1  288  PUERCO'S PINATA (669)      KHALHUMS
 HUMMEL 14-1404              92 146  6  263  MIKES (831)                TOBIR
 WHERE'S MY TOURNEY 82-2893  28   3  0  259  THAT TOTALLY SUCKS! (993)  DWES EG
 LUKARIAN LAMORAK 11-4841    68  89  1  243  SCARLET KNIGHTS (902)      ARUAK CITY
 VISION 26-1573             120  53  4  238  KELLUMBO'S KIDS (9)        CALEAM
 TALISMAN SHIELDGUA 11-4304  81 109  0  222  SCARLET KNIGHTS (902)      ARUAK CITY
 VAJRA VALMEJAR 11-4928      67  85  0  219  SCARLET KNIGHTS (902)      ARUAK CITY
 JOHN BOBBIT 4-3769          43  47  2  217  DEATH BY STUPIDITY (935)   JHELUM
 SMITH 14-1282               92 148  4  215  MIKES (831)                TOBIR
 BLIND GIRL 22-6041          50  23  0  213  KELLUMBO'S KIDS (978)      SOLVEN

GRAND CHAMPIONS               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 SANDS 11-4123               67 135  3  209  SCARLET KNIGHTS (902)      ARUAK CITY
 BLACKRAZOR 11-4091          66 138  1  205  SCARLET KNIGHTS (902)      ARUAK CITY
 DEATH FOG 45-4017           63  29  0  201  SUPERIOR FORCES (1030)     STORMCROWE
 GOKU 46-3655                90  74  2  197  DRAGONBALL Z (944)         ARDIVENT
 POETIC JUICE 66-2975        76  47  0  190  ANDORIAN UNIVERSITY (846)  TARRGIR
 NIXIE SEASPRITE 11-4992     66  76  1  189  SCARLET KNIGHTS (902)      ARUAK CITY
 GRANDPA RAT 22-6549         47  25  3  189  KELLUMBO'S KIDS (978)      SOLVEN
 LEADFOOT 40-3516            29  21  0  188  TACO GODS (198)            ZENSU

GRAND CHAMPIONS               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 SEXTANT 63-2415             17  13  1  187  SAILS OF CHARON (1013)     AMEN-TEI

GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS       W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 WOLVERINE 66-3871           65 119  4  180  X-FORCE (415)              TARRGIR
 VAN HELSING 11-6338         50  55  1  178  SCARLET KNIGHTS II (994)   ARUAK CITY
 WARDUKE 11-5930             55  69  3  176  SCARLET KNIGHTS II (994)   ARUAK CITY
 CONNOR MACLEOD 11-5532      64  78  0  175  SCARLET KNIGHTS II (994)   ARUAK CITY
 NAFISAH 22-6612             30  15  1  166  KELLUMBO'S KIDS (978)      SOLVEN
 TEEVELLA 82-24954           18   3  1  161  KELLUMBO'S KIDS (1045)     DWES EG

GRAND ADEPTS                  W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 KHORNE SHADOWSPAWN 46-3809  55  60  1  138  RUBY DRAGONS (1006)        ARDIVENT
 CLEMMIE 26-4630             27  35  1  133  GOLDEN CANYON (741)        CALEAM
 TORNADO CXCVI 60-5111       17  25  0  117  DEATH STUDS VII (877)      ARADI
 OOZING ORIFICES 71-3475     15   3  1  111  POSITIVELY PUTRID (940)    KYR'TERR

GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES    W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 HERO, HERO 68-446           16  37  0   91  DIAMONDS & RUST (820)      FIREHOLD

GRAND INITIATES               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 JACKSON 22-6649             23   2  0   87  KELLUMBO'S KIDS (978)      SOLVEN
 FRY GUY 40-3655             21  10  0   80  TACO GODS (198)            ZENSU
 LORIS KEY 26-4706           20  26  1   62  GOLDEN CANYON (741)        CALEAM
 GO-FER 26-4444              19  36  2   62  GOLDEN CANYON (741)        CALEAM
 GOLDERIE 26-4657            24  27  1   61  GOLDEN CANYON (741)        CALEAM
 FALCON XLI 60-7341          16  10  3   61  DEATH STUDS VII (877)      ARADI
 SARINA 26-4220              23  33  1   58  GOLDEN CANYON (741)        CALEAM
-JEROME 22-6675              18   3  0   57  KELLUMBO'S KIDS (978)      SOLVEN
-CUTTER 46-3847              15   7  0   52  DEATHTONGUE (111)          ARDIVENT
 BABY 43-2863                25  35  2   49  DARK SIDE (970)            VEASTIAN
 SOLARIS 46-3759             35  85  0   47  RUBY DRAGONS (1006)        ARDIVENT

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                   W   L  K TEAM NAME              SLAIN BY                  TURN
LORIS KEY 26-4706         20  26  1 GOLDEN CANYON 741      OOZING ORIFICES 26-3475   481

                               PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE

Jackson -- When I first saw you, I thought you were a lucious little thing.  Then you
hit me!  I have no use for violent women, so just clear off. -- Go-Fer

Tornado 196 -- At least you don't involve turnips!  I believe I can do something with
this,  For instance, a funnel (very shallow) of whipped mashed potatoes centered on a
judiciously seasoned roast.  A bit of an inversion, perhaps, with the calm at the rim
and the eye rather exciting.  A little cayenne, black pepper, garlic, that kind of
thing, rubbed on the meat which is then slowly roasted... hmm.  There are
possibilities here.  Let me work on this. -- Clemmie

Orhlam -- Pie, I'm almost certain.  A cream pie.  Chocolate, with a whipped cream
topping sprinkled with grated orange peel. -- Loris Key

Tarin Sharpeyes -- I never expected to become an enthusiast for rice with eyes, but
it's growing on me.  Probably buttered, to cut the sharpness. -- Golderie

Solaris -- (indignantly)  I may not be a highly experienced chef, but you won't catch
me with that one!  Sunflower seeds in an omelet?  The wrong sort of texture contrast
entirely. -- Sarina

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

JACKSON devastated GO-FER in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge fight.
LUCIAS CLAY won victory over NIXIE SEASPRITE in a 1 minute Challenge battle.
SEXTANT was overpowered by TALISMAN SHIELDGUARD in a 1 minute Challenge duel.
LEADFOOT was overpowered by VAJRA VALMEJAR in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match.
GRANDPA RAT was viciously subdued by LUKARIAN LAMORAK in a 3 minute Challenge duel.
BLIND GIRL beat BLACKRAZOR in a crowd pleasing 3 minute Challenge brawl.
NAFISAH overpowered KHORNE SHADOWSPAWN in a 1 minute uneven Challenge melee.
TORNADO CXCVI was vanquished by CONNOR MACLEOD in a 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
AXLY HIMSELF vanquished DEATH FOG in a 2 minute one-sided Title duel.
POETIC JUICE was defeated by JOHN BOBBIT in a 2 minute gruesome match.
WHERE'S MY TOURNEY? overpowered BERYL in a exciting 1 minute one-sided fight.
HUMMEL devastated VAN HELSING in a exciting 1 minute mismatched conflict.
VISION subdued SANDS in a popular 3 minute bloody brawl.
STELLA BLUE handily defeated GOKU in a popular 1 minute bloody uneven fight.
SMITH vanquished WOLVERINE in a crowd pleasing 1 minute one-sided fray.
TEEVELLA was viciously subdued by RHYNIAN ALANDA in a popular 2 minute brutal brawl.
WARDUKE demolished CLEMMIE in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
OOZING ORIFICES executed LORIS KEY in a 1 minute mismatched fight.
HERO, HERO devastated SARINA in a 1 minute one-sided contest.
FALCON XLI defeated SOLARIS in a 2 minute brutal duel.
BABY was beaten by GOLDERIE in a 2 minute fray.
FRY GUY vanquished OHRLAM in a popular 1 minute brutal mismatched fray.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                   9         PARRY-STRIKE       7 -   3 -  0      70  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  7         LUNGING ATTACK    40 -  20 -  2      67  |
|AIMED BLOW                       6         AIMED BLOW        40 -  22 -  0      65  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      4         TOTAL PARRY       16 -  17 -  0      48  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    4         PARRY-RIPOSTE     13 -  18 -  1      42  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      3         SLASHING ATTACK   20 -  31 -  1      39  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    3         BASHING ATTACK     5 -   9 -  0      36  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  2         PARRY-LUNGE       10 -  20 -  2      33  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   2         STRIKING ATTACK    7 -  16 -  0      30  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     1         WALL OF STEEL     10 -  25 -  0      29  |

Turn 481 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-LUNGE        3 -  0     SLASHING ATTACK    3 -  4         4  LUNGING ATTACK 
PARRY-STRIKE       1 -  0     AIMED BLOW         2 -  4         2  TOTAL PARRY    
TOTAL PARRY        3 -  1     PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -  2         1  AIMED BLOW     
LUNGING ATTACK     5 -  4     WALL OF STEEL      1 -  3         1  PARRY-LUNGE    
STRIKING ATTACK    1 -  1                                       1  STRIKING ATTACK
BASHING ATTACK     1 -  1                                       1  WALL OF STEEL  
                                                                1  PARRY-STRIKE   

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
AIMED BLOW       AXLY HIMSELF 11-2363      111  73  1  507 GERFEL'S FRIENDS (396)
LUNGING ATTACK   LUCIAS CLAY 22-6359        58  36  1  318 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (978)
PARRY-LUNGE      HUMMEL 14-1404             92 146  6  263 MIKES (831)
TOTAL PARRY      WHERE'S MY TOURNE 82-2893  28   3  0  259 THAT TOTALLY SUCKS! (993)
STRIKING ATTACK  VAJRA VALMEJAR 11-4928     67  85  0  219 SCARLET KNIGHTS (902)
WALL OF STEEL    JOHN BOBBIT 4-3769         43  47  2  217 DEATH BY STUPIDITY (935)
PARRY-STRIKE     SMITH 14-1282              92 148  4  215 MIKES (831)
SLASHING ATTACK  SANDS 11-4123              67 135  3  209 SCARLET KNIGHTS (902)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    GRANDPA RAT 22-6549        47  25  3  189 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (978)
BASHING ATTACK   CLEMMIE 26-4630            27  35  1  133 GOLDEN CANYON (741)

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
The overall popularity leader is VISION 26-1573.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was BLACKRAZOR 11-4091.  The ten other most popular fighters were LUKARIAN LAMORAK 
11-4841, VISION 26-1573, LUCIAS CLAY 22-6359, TALISMAN SHIELDGUARD 11-4304, AXLY 
HIMSELF 11-2363, JOHN BOBBIT 4-3769, SANDS 11-4123, STELLA BLUE 53-6167, SMITH 
14-1282, and FALCON XLI 60-7341.

The least popular fighter this week was SARINA 26-4220.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were LORIS KEY 26-4706, CLEMMIE 26-4630, VAN HELSING 11-6338, LEADFOOT 
40-3516, GO-FER 26-4444, BABY 43-2863, SOLARIS 46-3759, OOZING ORIFICES 71-3475, GOKU 
46-3655, and TORNADO CXCVI 60-5111.

Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  
JHELUM(4)            1  0 0  VEASTIAN(43)         0  1 0  AMEN-TEI(63)         0  1 0  
ARUAK CITY(11)       6  4 0  STORMCROWE(45)       0  1 0  TARRGIR(66)          0  2 0  
TOBIR(14)            2  0 0  ARDIVENT(46)         0  3 0  FIREHOLD(68)         1  0 0  
SOLVEN(22)           4  1 0  KHALHUMS(53)         1  0 0  KYR'TERR(71)         1  0 1  
CALEAM(26)           2  4 0  ARADI(60)            1  1 0  DWES EG(82)          1  1 0  
ZENSU(40)            1  1 0  

TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 JOHN BOBBIT 4-3769          43  47  2  217  DEATH BY STUPIDITY (935)   JHELUM
 AXLY HIMSELF 11-2363       111  73  1  507  GERFEL'S FRIENDS (396)     ARUAK CITY
 HUMMEL 14-1404              92 146  6  263  MIKES (831)                TOBIR
 LUCIAS CLAY 22-6359         58  36  1  318  KELLUMBO'S KIDS (978)      SOLVEN
 VISION 26-1573             120  53  4  238  KELLUMBO'S KIDS (9)        CALEAM
 LEADFOOT 40-3516            29  21  0  188  TACO GODS (198)            ZENSU
 BABY 43-2863                25  35  2   49  DARK SIDE (970)            VEASTIAN
 DEATH FOG 45-4017           63  29  0  201  SUPERIOR FORCES (1030)     STORMCROWE
 GOKU 46-3655                90  74  2  197  DRAGONBALL Z (944)         ARDIVENT
 STELLA BLUE 53-6167         55  28  1  288  PUERCO'S PINATA (669)      KHALHUMS
 TORNADO CXCVI 60-5111       17  25  0  117  DEATH STUDS VII (877)      ARADI
 SEXTANT 63-2415             17  13  1  187  SAILS OF CHARON (1013)     AMEN-TEI
 POETIC JUICE 66-2975        76  47  0  190  ANDORIAN UNIVERSITY (846)  TARRGIR
 HERO, HERO 68-446           16  37  0   91  DIAMONDS & RUST (820)      FIREHOLD
 OOZING ORIFICES 71-3475     15   3  1  111  POSITIVELY PUTRID (940)    KYR'TERR
 WHERE'S MY TOURNEY 82-2893  28   3  0  259  THAT TOTALLY SUCKS! (993)  DWES EG

                         SUMMER FACE-TO-FACE IN MINNEAPOLIS!

Our summer FTF will be held in Minneapolis, Minnesota, July 18-20, 2008.  It will be 
held at the Holiday Inn Select Minneapolis/St. Paul in Blomington, MN, just down the 
street from the Mall of America, at 3 Appletree Square (952-854-9000).  Rooms are only 
$105.00 per night, 1-2 occupancy.  There is a free 24-hour shuttle from the airport
and free shuttle service to the mall; free parking, free high-speed wireless internet
in all guestrooms.  There is a large fitness center, jacuzzi, and indoor pool.  The 
rooms are blocked--ask for the "Reality Simulations" room block.  There are tons of 
restaurants nearby at the Mall, as well as a cafe in the hotel.  

Hotel info:  www.himspairport.com
Mall of America:  www.mallofamerica.com

The tournament information sheet will be out imminently.  We hope you're all looking 
forward to the tournament and that we will see you there!