AD

Date   : 08/25/2008    Duedate: 09/06/2008

ANDORAK

DM-105    TURN-486

RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %  RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %
  1 KELLUMBO'S KIDS 26/9  528  339  9 60.9      DEATH STUDS VII 60/877                
    KELLUMBO'S KIDS 82/1045                     DIAMONDS & RUST 68/820                
    KELLUMBO'S KIDS 22/978                      DARK SIDE 43/970                      
    KELLUMBO'S KIDS06-17 82/1048              4 X-FORCE 66/415       1518 2070 20 42.3
  2 SUPERIOR FOR 45/1030  589  393  2 60.0      DRAGONBALL Z 46/944                   
    SUPERIOR FORCES 34 82/1037                  SCARLET KNIGHTS II 11/994             
    SUPERIOR FORCES 3J 65/1031                  SCARLET KNIGHTS 11/902                
    SUPERIOR FORCES 3P 82/1035                  RUBY DRAGONS 46/1006                  
    SUPERIOR FORCES 1601 60/1050              5 GOLDEN CANYON 26/741  597 1037  9 36.5
  3 TACO GODS 40/198     1167  841 19 58.1    6 MIKES 14/831          386  707 11 35.3
    THAT TOTALLY SUCKS! 82/993            

    '##/###' Avoid teams by their Team Id     '-'  Team did not fight this turn

                                  WARRIOR SPOTLIGHT

        + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ The Andorian Succession #11 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +

Istoreth, Skaithvarn:

     "Somehow I hadn't expected the city to be so beautiful," Gissaniah said.  "All
these white towers and colonnades and..." she waved her hand vaguely to encompass the
relentless architectural unity of the the S'varnian city.
     "Gets to you, doesn't it?"
     The voice behind her was not Sedalia's, and she turned to see who had come up.
A man, tall, lean, dark-skinned and well-dressed in the Delarquan style, narrow
features with a slightly elvish cast, white hair and neatly trimmed beard.  "I don't
believe we've been introduced?" she said.
     "Tainvar of Osksi.  An ambassador of sorts."
     "From Osksi to Istoreth?"
     He shrugged.  "We have a trade agreement.  It pleases the Istorese to have one
of the Twelve around to watch it."  He stared along the graceful curve of the street
ahead of them, all white columns and narrow, dark cypresses.  "We take it in turns,"
he added.  "This isn't a good place for ordinary people to be."
     "Why not?"  Another voice behind, and this time it was the senator.  Gissanniah
turned farther and saw that Sedalia, though in a freshly pressed white suit, was
looking frazzled around the edges.
     "The magic," Tainvar said.  His stare at the street deepened to a frown, his
hand creeping toward his belt dagger.  "I always thought the Adantri were perverse,
or at least unreasonable, in banning all magic from their lands.  But if they'd been
subjected to this--"  He waved his hand at the vista and snorted.  "Well, then I
could understand how they came to take against magic."
     Sedalia's eyebrows rose and he looked around carefully.  So did Gissanniah.
Grace, beauty, perfection.  It was depressing.  "Illusion?" the senator asked.
     The Osksian nodded.  "Some, at least.  Hard to know which or how much.  I
suppose it's cheaper than paint."  He shrugged and sighed, then faced the gladiators
squarely.  "And why are you here?  Andoria trying to negotiate a treaty, too?"
     "Just passing through," Sedalia said smoothly.  "A little magical glitch when we
tried to get off the Isle of the Eye.  We're headed for home, as soon as we, ah, do
some little service for our 'hosts'--"
     "Very hot on getting value for their effort, the Istorese," Tainvar said.  "I
wish you good luck of them.  If you have more trouble than seems reasonable getting
away, I have a ship."
     "I seem to recall that Delarquans are also, as you put it, hot on getting value
for their effort," Sedalia said.  "And while there is no war that I know of between
Andoria and the Federation, still, you will understand if I'm hesitant."
     Tainvar shrugged again, looking uncomfortable.  "Just... a hunch that we might
be able to do each other a service or two," he said finally.  "Without prejudice to
either of our national interests."
     "National interests," the senator said, tasting the phrase.  "The Delarquan
Federation is no more a monolithic single entity than the Andorian League, perhaps
less, and no more possessed of a single focus of interest."
     "Yes.  And times are unsettled.  A friend is always good to have."  The
Delarquan looked past them down the avenue.  "Ah.  The Lord High Magician comes, and
I suspect you are about to learn what the Istorese would have you do.  I will leave
you to it."  He moved off quickly, slipping into a side street that the two
gladiators hadn't noticed up to that point.
     The magician--he wasn't one of the ones they'd met at the lake--stared at them
for several moments.  "I am not convinced that the specificity of the spell
guarantees you can do the job that awaits," he said.  He looked them up and down and
pursed his lips.  "The two of you appear to be simply... muscle.  The task will call
for more, for wit and subtlety.  Are you capable of that?"
     Sedalia bristled, there was no other word for it.  Gissanniah was reminded of a
dog challenged on its own territory by a cur of dubious origin.  "I am a politician
of many years' experience," he said.  "I can do wit, subtlety, and cunning maneuver
with any demon you care to name and come out in a draw or better."
     "Were you not a politician," the magician said, "I would advise you to pray, but
it is known that politicians worship no god.  Never the less, you must hope that you
have not overstated your ability, for it is against just such risks that you must
contend.  Come."  He turned and stalked off down the avenue.
     Sedalia glanced at Gissanniah and shrugged.  She shrugged back.  They followed
the Istorene down through the too-perfect streets of the city toward the waterfront.

        + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ The Andorian Succession #12 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +

Fratsfa:

     Fandil and Lenpro drew rein on the top of the hill, pausing to let their horses
breathe and to look down into the valley where the ancient city of Fratsfa lay
sprawled.
     "When I'm away from here," Fandil said, "I forget how much of the city is...
old."
     "Go ahead and say 'ruined'," Lenpro replied.
     "How about, ah, antique and picturesque?"
     "Old, abandoned, and falling apart," Lenpro countered.  There were times when
diplomatic phrasing just didn't do it for him, and this was one of them.  Half the
city was in abandoned ruins, and what was the use putting a polite face on it?
They'd better hope that it didn't indicate that "antique and picturesque" appealed to
Emperor Alonj.  Well, they'd find out soon enough.  He dismissed the whole question
with an abrupt gesture.  "That isn't why we're here.  We have to find a new king for
the Andorian League, while there's still a League at all.  Let's get on with it."  He
nudged his mount forward.
     Fandil followe.  "A 'fixer-upper' of a city?" he suggested.  "I hope this
doesn't represent Along's taste."
     Lenpro shrugged.  "We'll find out."
     "Lady Fern will know," Fandil agreed.
     They went straight to the guildhouse run by Consortium member Lady Fern,
entering through the back.
     The heavy, earthy scent of growing things, overlaid with a mixture of flower
scents, greeted them, closely followed by Lady Fern herself.  She was frowning.  "The
back entrance is not for the use of--  Why, Fandil and Lenpro!  It's been a long time
since you came for a visit.  Come into my private office and we can talk or whatever
seems appropriate, hmm?  Should I call some of the girls to... bring us wine?"
     Fandil blushed.  "Not right now, Fern," he said.  "We've a lot of talking to do
first."
     She sighed but led the way into the room she used as an office, which to Lenpro
would be better described as a boudoir.  A luxurious boudoir.  "I suppose you've come
about the news of Andor," she said.  "The whole city is buzzing with it, and probably
the countryside for miles around."
     "The news of Andor," Fandil repeated, speaking slowly as though tasting a wine
of dubious origin.  "Tell us the news of Andor as you've heard it, Fern."
     She shrugged and looked away for a moment.  "They say that the king has returned
to Andor from the Isle.  Some say it isn't the king, though, that no one could be
sure, just seeing him riding through the city in a carriage.  How many people are
there who knew him well and are still around, after all?  Some say that, king or not,
something is wrong.  Magic, illness, impersonation, the rumors get wilder by the
hour.  And it all comes down to rumors, in the end, there isn't anything I'd call
firm information."  She turned back to face them.  "What have you heard?"
     "Less, because we've been traveling," Lenpro said.  "But enough to know that
even if that is truly the King of Andor, alive, well, in his right mind, whatever,
it's too little and too late.  The League is in jeopardy, and the king has lost the
confidence of his subjects."  He glanced at his companion for further comment.
     Fandil sat unmoving for several minutes, staring into his goblet of wine as
though it were a crystal ball.  "The king is dead," he said finally, "or as good as
dead, so far as the League is concerned."
     Fern nodded once.  "I feared that might be so.  Some of my personal contacts--
not like that, Lenpro, so you needn't smirk!--have hinted at it.  But what is to be
done about it?"
     "Replace the king with someone who will take the governance of the League
seriously," Lenpro said.  "That, or watch it fall apart, with the Delarquans
encroaching from the south and the Karnhorns from the north."
     "Just 'replace the king'?  I see your point, but it's easier said than done,"
Lady Fern countered.  "People will see it as rebellion, whatever they do or don't
think about the king."
     "If the new king is someone chosen 'at large', so to speak, yes," Lenpro said.
"But if it's someone who has legitimacy, who would be recognized as having it--"
     "Such as?  You must have a specific person in mind."
     "Emperor Alonj of Fratsfa."
     "He won't do it," Fern said.
     Lenpro ignored that.  "There are the long-standing rumors that he's either
insane or feeble-minded, of course, not that many people would object to either of
those qualities in a king, but... is there any truth in those rumors?"
     "No.  I think, myself, it was his mother's doing.  Maybe not her intent, but her
fault anyway.  Since his marriage, Emperor Alonj has demonstrated to the satisfaction
of the people here that he is sane and intelligent.  Which is why he won't accept the
position of king of the League.  He isn't thrilled being Emperor of the Frafrejan
Empire, however shrunken it is now, so how much less thrilled would he be if he was
ruler of the whole of Andoria with real authority?"  She shook her head.  "He won't
do it."  She glanced at Fandil in appeal, but the old mage refused to meet her eyes
or to say anything.
     "It's his plain duty," Lenpro said.  "And he should be able to see that, when
it's pointed out.  Would he take the post on those terms, do you think?"
     Fern sighed.  "Probably, but it seems cruel to condemn the man to such a fate,
now that he's had a few years of happiness to make the contrast.  His wife won't be
thrilled, either."
     "Will she oppose it?"
     "No.  she understands 'duty', too.  But it will be important to have her support
before you ever approach Alonj."
     "That's exactly the kind of inside information we need," Lenpro said.  "Do you
know anyone who can arrange a meeting with her?"
     "Oh, I can do that," Fern said.  "We met some time ago, quite by accident--she's
interested in flowers.  But she's friendly, and we still get together now and then.
Girl talk, you know.  I can arrange something."
     "You're a wonder, Lady Fern."
     "Yes, Lenpro, I know.  And don't you forget it."

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                          ---===ANDORIAN REGIONAL NEWS===---

                                     Duelmasters
                                     -----------
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 299): MISS TOOK of LADIES IN WAITING (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 599): SNOW WHITE of COLORIFIC (Purple People Eater, mgr.)
 DM  14 TOBIR (turn 600): WESTON of OTAGO HIGHLANDERS (The Mun, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 593): LIPSTICK of KELLUMBO'S KIDS (Detective Kellumbo, mgr.)
 DM  24 ZORPUNT (turn 588): DAVID WAYBUR of MEDAL OF HONOR F3 (The Anarchist, mgr.)
 DM  25 LYRATILAN (turn 589): STAN DAUFF of FUNKY FOLK (Papa Bear, mgr.)
 DM  26 CALEAM (turn 586): ALEGRIA of MENAGERIE (Ichabod Frothingslosh, mgr.)
 DM  30 IAYE (turn 582): NULN of I TRAINED THEM (Soultaker, mgr.)
 DM  40 ZENSU (turn 550): BELA LUGOSI of MEN OF 1,000 FACES (Mad Max, mgr.)
 DM  41 KATI-TEI (turn 541): GUNS OF BRIXTON of RADIO CLASH (Rude Buddha, mgr.)
 DM  46 ARDIVENT (turn 532): GODZILLA of THE BEARS II (Papa Bear, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 246): LEO of DARQUE AGES (Master Darque, mgr.)
 DM  63 AMEN-TEI (turn 434): DIMAGGIO oF 1949 YANKEES (Papa Bear, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 200): ALBURQUERQUE of WESTERN FRONTIER (Crip, mgr.)
ADM 105 ANDORAK (turn 484): VISION of KELLUMBO'S KIDS (Detective Kellumbo, mgr.)

                                      Top Teams
                                      ---------
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 299): CONSANGUINEOUS (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 599): POSITION IS EMPTY
 DM  14 TOBIR (turn 596): OTAGO HIGHLANDERS (The Mun, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 593): KELLUMBO'S KIDS (Detective Kellumbo, mgr.)
 DM  24 ZORPUNT (turn 588): KRILL CAVALRY (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  25 LYRATILAN (turn 589): FUNKY FOLK (Papa Bear, mgr.)
 DM  26 CALEAM (turn 586): MENAGERIE (Ichabod Frothingslosh, mgr.)
 DM  30 IAYE (turn 582): LENPROS (Lenpro, mgr.)
 DM  40 ZENSU (turn 550): MEDAL OF HONOR G1 (The Anarchist, mgr.)
 DM  41 KATI-TEI (turn 541): WANDERERS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  46 ARDIVENT (turn 532): THE ZEN ZONE (Jondeaux, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 246): OTTO'S PARTS (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  63 AMEN-TEI (turn 434): THE EXILED ONES (Darklock, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 200): OUT OF THIS WORLD (Crip, mgr.)
ADM 105 ANDORAK (turn 484): KELLUMBO'S KIDS (Detective Kellumbo, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
                                   ----------------
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 298): UNHOLY TERROR of BLOOD RITES (Wretch, mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 599): BLACK EYES of COLORIFIC (Purple People Eater, mgr.)
                   (turn 598): PONY of KRILL CAVALRY (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 592): DONDRIC of KELLUMBO'S KIDS (Detective Kellumbo, mgr.)
 DM  26 CALEAM (turn 586): ALEGRIA of MENAGERIE (Ichabod Frothingslosh, mgr.)

                             REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER

     So!  We're looking better today with nineteen fights, quite respectable as
things are figured in this Year of the Green Monkey.  True, we had four standbys on
the sands, but that's a bagatelle, we still had thirty-four active gladiators, which
beats Home Guard with eighteen all to pieces.  Seize your victories where you find
them.
     In regard of which: today's fights.  Nineteen, as I said, with four standbys.
Seven of them were challenge matches (all challenges issued by Kellumbo's Kids), and
two of the challenges were TV.  Rumor in the back halls of the arena has it that
gladiators on other teams are petitioning to join Kellumbo's Kids "because their
manager cares."  Nice try, won't fly, boys and girls and golems.
     Death Studs VII was Most Avoided today, by (who else?) Kellumbo's Kids.
     Blackrazor got the most challenges, but will not be opening a fast food joint,
for which we are all grateful.

The fights:
     FRY GUY (40-3655) (24-11-0,78) of TACO GODS fought GOLDERIE (26-4657) (26-29-
1,72) of GOLDEN CANYON.  FRY GUY was devastated by GOLDERIE in a 1 minute one-sided
contest.  The word in the kitchens is that Golderie intends to cut deep fat out of
her cooking, thus her hostility to Fry Guy.  At least, that's my best guess.  Many
people come back from resurrection with a little unfocused hostility, and Fry Guy may
just have been in the wrong place at the wrong time.
     BABY (43-2863) (26-38-2,47) of DARK SIDE fought GO-FER (26-4444) (19-40-2,48) of
GOLDEN CANYON.  BABY was overpowered by GO-FER in a 1 minute mismatched fight.  A
classic case, and one I had never expected to see:  Go-Fer threw the Baby out with
the bathwater!  You hear about such things, but it always seems to have happened to
someone known to a cousin of a friend of a guy you met in a bar.
     KHORNE SHADOWSPAWN (46-3809) (56-63-1,136) of RUBY DRAGONS fought LAWRENCE THE
SOT (105-10) (0-0-0,150) of Random Members of the Audience.  KHORNE SHADOWSPAWN
subdued LAWRENCE THE SOT in an exciting 1 minute bout.  One is tempted to say,
"Anyone can defeat a drunk."  But Lawrence, despite his habits, is not an easy win.
     CONNOR MACLEOD (11-5532) (65-81-0,102) of SCARLET KNIGHTS II fought SARINA (26-
4220) (26-34-1,131) of GOLDEN CANYON.  CONNOR MACLEOD devastated SARINA in a 2 minute
one-sided fight.  I hardly know what to say of this.  "Experience will out"?  "Never
try to fight while juggling a haggis recipe"?
     VAN HELSING (11-6338) (51-58-1,152) of SCARLET KNIGHTS II fought RHYNIAN ALANDA
(105-9) (0-0-0,200) of Random Members of the Audience.  VAN HELSING was beaten by
RHYNIAN ALANDA in a 2 minute bloody brawl.  And some people think standbys are easy!
Even in the lower levels, there are standbys who are... not so easy.
     WARDUKE (11-5930) (57-71-3,192) of SCARLET KNIGHTS II fought GHRYSHAN (105-25)
(0-0-0,181) of Random Members of the Audience.  WARDUKE vanquished GHRYSHAN in an
action packed 1 minute gruesome mismatched bout.  In its way, an unkind act.
Ghryshan is a veteran, you know, and we should have a thought for the veterans now
and then.

     HUMMEL (14-1404) (93-149-6,198) of MIKES fought VAJRA VALMEJAR (11-4928) (69-87-
0,197) of SCARLET KNIGHTS.  HUMMEL was devastated by VAJRA VALMEJAR in a crowd
pleasing 1 minute mismatched bout.  There is a marginal note here in the notes--they
are prepared by scribes in the Commission office who are not always as uninvolved as
one expects--to the effect that Hummel was Pummeled.  Ha ha.  Very clever.  The truth
is, Hummel wasn't paying attention.  To Vajra's blade.  There were those enticing
curves....
     WOLVERINE (66-3871) (67-121-5,186) of X-FORCE fought HERO, HERO (68-446) (20-37-
0,163) of DIAMONDS & RUST.  WOLVERINE was handily defeated by HERO, HERO in an
exciting 1 minute one-sided contest.  It may be that I have been unduly influenced by
the cooks from Caleam into seeing Hero, Hero as the purveyor of huge sandwiches, and
yet... what else could that be in his pocket?
     TALISMAN SHIELDGUARD (11-4304) (81-113-0,187) of SCARLET KNIGHTS fought DEATH
FOG (45-4017) (66-30-0,203) of SUPERIOR FORCES.  TALISMAN SHIELDGUARD was overpowered
by DEATH FOG in a 1 minute one-sided match.  At one point the move to ban any form of
chemical warfare in the arena looked like it would sweep away the opposition, but
then someone explained to the gladiators that this would entail bathing at frequent
intervals and regular dental care.  So much for outlawing chemical warfare, and there
are people who know how to use it to advantage.
     GOKU (46-3655) (93-75-2,224) of DRAGONBALL Z fought RHYNIAN ALANDA (105-9) (0-0-
0,200) of Random Members of the Audience.  GOKU overpowered RHYNIAN ALANDA in an
action packed 2 minute gory one-sided fight.  One of my researchers tells me that
Goku is not, in fact, a dragon ball, he merely eats them.  I think this is worse.
     SNAKE CHARMER (22-6169) (48-23-0,217) of KELLUMBO'S KIDS fought NIXIE SEASPRITE
(11-4992) (67-79-1,208) of SCARLET KNIGHTS.  SNAKE CHARMER unbelievably bested NIXIE
SEASPRITE in an action packed 3 minute fight.  The office clerks are, perhaps, too
easily astonished.  Either that, or they consistently bet money on losers.  I find
this victory by the Charmer to be entirely credible.
     SMITH (14-1282) (96-148-4,264) of MIKES fought LUKARIAN LAMORAK (11-4841) (69-
92-1,208) of SCARLET KNIGHTS.  SMITH was handily defeated by LUKARIAN LAMORAK in a 1
minute uneven melee.  And a good thing, too, because if the defeat had been achieved
footily, the Kung-Foot Society would have risen in protest with a hearty "Ki-AIII"
and lodged their unwashed feet in a lot of unwelcoming mouths.  I don't know how they
get away with it.

The challenge matches:
     NAFISAH (22-6612) (33-16-1,165) of KELLUMBO'S KIDS challenged CLEMMIE (26-4630)
(28-38-1,157) of GOLDEN CANYON.  Down 8.  NAFISAH overcame CLEMMIE in a 2 minute
Challenge fight.  A bold move, Nafisah, since you can't guess what kind of culinary,
ah, product Clemmie might see fit to name after this battle.
     TEEVELLA (82-24954) (21-4-1,175) of KELLUMBO'S KIDS challenged TORNADO CXCVI
(60-5111) (18-28-0,148) of DEATH STUDS VII.  Down 27.  TEEVELLA was overpowered by
TORNADO CXCVI in a 2 minute one-sided Challenge struggle.  There are those who would
say that you asked for that, Teevella.  They're the ones too far away for you to feed
them their opinions on the point of your sword.  People who think they're safe from
retribution are always more outspoken.
     BLIND GIRL (22-6041) (53-24-0,197) of KELLUMBO'S KIDS challenged BLACKRAZOR (11-
4091) (67-141-2,226) of SCARLET KNIGHTS.  Up 29.  BLIND GIRL bested BLACKRAZOR in an
action packed 4 minute Challenge brawl.  And I want to give the Blind Girl a hearty
congratulations for this win, an up-challenge both ways against a veritable fossil.
[Note, more than two hundred regular-arena fights and not inducted to Primus makes
you a fossil.]
     GRANDPA RAT (22-6549) (50-26-3,196) of KELLUMBO'S KIDS challenged SANDS (11-
4123) (67-139-3,198) of SCARLET KNIGHTS.  Up 2.  GRANDPA RAT was savagely defeated by
SANDS in a 2 minute brutal Challenge fight.  Sometimes you have to take risks.  I
hope you learned well from this, Sir Rat.

The tv challenges, and, as usual, a congratulations to those members of this arena
community who entered the tourney and did well there.  I'd congratulate those who
entered and did poorly, for having the nerve to try, but I don't know who they are.
They seem to have buried their performances in oblivion.  Probably just as well.
     DARNESHA (82-42015) (14-4-1,70) of KELLUMBO'S KIDS06-17 TV challenged LORIS KEY
(26-4706) (20-30-1,51) of GOLDEN CANYON.  Down 19.  DARNESHA vanquished LORIS KEY in
a 1 minute uneven Challenge battle.  That seems a bit like shooting fishing in a
barrel, but what do I know?  To spy report is not the same as to manage.
     JACKSON (22-6649) (27-2-0,96) of KELLUMBO'S KIDS TV challenged SOLARIS (46-3759)
(35-89-0,66) of RUBY DRAGONS.  Down 30.  JACKSON devastated SOLARIS in a 1 minute
mismatched Challenge fight.  And there's this to say for it, you can always be sure
of having fresh fish for dinner.

For the title:
     VISION (26-1573) (124-53-4,279) of KELLUMBO'S KIDS challenged WHERE'S MY
TOURNEY? (82-2893) (32-3-0,307) of THAT TOTALLY SUCKS!  Up 28.  VISION demolished
WHERE'S MY TOURNEY? in a 8 minute uneven Challenge Title fight.  And a most hearty
congratulations to Vision.  You can give him his tourney now.

                                       Ardane

THE KING'S SENTINEL           W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 VISION 26-1573             125  53  4  307  KELLUMBO'S KIDS (9)        CALEAM

GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS    W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
-GOLDWRAP 82-11886           38  11  0  267  SUPERIOR FORCES 34 (1037)  DWES EG
 GOKU 46-3655                94  75  2  237  DRAGONBALL Z (944)         ARDIVENT
 SNAKE CHARMER 22-6169       49  23  0  223  KELLUMBO'S KIDS (978)      SOLVEN
-TITANIA 65-5835             40  26  0  221  SUPERIOR FORCES 3J (1031)  DAL SHANG
 LUKARIAN LAMORAK 11-4841    70  92  1  219  SCARLET KNIGHTS (902)      ARUAK CITY
 SANDS 11-4123               68 139  3  215  SCARLET KNIGHTS (902)      ARUAK CITY
 DEATH FOG 45-4017           67  30  0  213  SUPERIOR FORCES (1030)     STORMCROWE

GRAND CHAMPIONS               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 WHERE'S MY TOURNEY 82-2893  32   4  0  210  THAT TOTALLY SUCKS! (993)  DWES EG

GRAND CHAMPIONS               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 VAJRA VALMEJAR 11-4928      70  87  0  209  SCARLET KNIGHTS (902)      ARUAK CITY
 NIXIE SEASPRITE 11-4992     67  80  1  205  SCARLET KNIGHTS (902)      ARUAK CITY
 BLACKRAZOR 11-4091          67 142  2  204  SCARLET KNIGHTS (902)      ARUAK CITY
 BLIND GIRL 22-6041          54  24  0  204  KELLUMBO'S KIDS (978)      SOLVEN
 WARDUKE 11-5930             58  71  3  200  SCARLET KNIGHTS II (994)   ARUAK CITY
-FINALITY 82-4063            33  19  1  200  SUPERIOR FORCES 3P (1035)  DWES EG
 GRANDPA RAT 22-6549         50  27  3  192  KELLUMBO'S KIDS (978)      SOLVEN
 SMITH 14-1282               96 149  4  190  MIKES (831)                TOBIR
 TALISMAN SHIELDGUA 11-4304  81 114  0  190  SCARLET KNIGHTS (902)      ARUAK CITY
 HUMMEL 14-1404              93 150  6  188  MIKES (831)                TOBIR
 HERO, HERO 68-446           21  37  0  186  DIAMONDS & RUST (820)      FIREHOLD

GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS       W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 TORNADO CXCVI 60-5111       19  28  0  180  DEATH STUDS VII (877)      ARADI
 NAFISAH 22-6612             34  16  1  169  KELLUMBO'S KIDS (978)      SOLVEN
 WOLVERINE 66-3871           67 122  5  165  X-FORCE (415)              TARRGIR
 VAN HELSING 11-6338         51  59  1  159  SCARLET KNIGHTS II (994)   ARUAK CITY
 CLEMMIE 26-4630             28  39  1  159  GOLDEN CANYON (741)        CALEAM
 KHORNE SHADOWSPAWN 46-3809  57  63  1  151  RUBY DRAGONS (1006)        ARDIVENT
 TEEVELLA 82-24954           21   5  1  151  KELLUMBO'S KIDS (1045)     DWES EG

GRAND ADEPTS                  W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 CONNOR MACLEOD 11-5532      66  81  0  128  SCARLET KNIGHTS II (994)   ARUAK CITY
 SARINA 26-4220              26  35  1  106  GOLDEN CANYON (741)        CALEAM

GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES    W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 JACKSON 22-6649             28   2  0   99  KELLUMBO'S KIDS (978)      SOLVEN
 GOLDERIE 26-4657            27  29  1   92  GOLDEN CANYON (741)        CALEAM

GRAND INITIATES               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 DARNESHA 82--23521          15   4  1   75  KELLUMBO'S KIDS06-17 (1048 DWES EG
 SOLARIS 46-3759             35  90  0   71  RUBY DRAGONS (1006)        ARDIVENT
 FRY GUY 40-3655             24  12  0   65  TACO GODS (198)            ZENSU
 GO-FER 26-4444              20  40  2   58  GOLDEN CANYON (741)        CALEAM
-DONDRIC 22-6694             18   3  1   58  KELLUMBO'S KIDS (978)      SOLVEN
 LORIS KEY 26-4706           20  31  1   49  GOLDEN CANYON (741)        CALEAM
 BABY 43-2863                26  39  2   37  DARK SIDE (970)            VEASTIAN

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                   W   L  K TEAM NAME              SLAIN BY                  TURN

                               PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE

Wow, personal DM Spyreport and Andoria Team Spotlights are back!  Thanks, Scribe! --
Manager

     You're welcome.

Darnesha -- I've never done much with "ethnic" cooking, but I suppose I could try.
What are we looking at here?  Falafel and garlic chicken?  I could probably do that.
-- Loris Key the Dubious but Willing
P.S.  And sour cream, I think.  Many things are improved by sour cream.
P.P.S.  But I don't see how they could be shishkebabed.  Well, maybe the chicken.

Blackrazor -- Catch me ever cooking for *you*, bub!  Starve. -- Clemmie

Lawrence the Sot -- A wine marinade?  Yes, okay, I can do a wine marinade.  I think
for venison, or maybe hare, both of them rather, ah, gamy meats.  This is not, you
understand, in the same category as a wine *sauce*, which is a much more delicate
thing meant to enhance the flavor of the meat rather than tame it. -- Sarina

Fry Guy -- Dammit!  Who said *you* could get in on the cooking spree?  What happened
to sane, sensible gladiators who just got drunk and never bothered about eating? --
Go-Fer

Shinorr -- Ah, very nice!  Lamb can be so tricky, but this new herb-and-spice rub
plus roasting it in a sealed pot seems to do the trick entirely.  Thanks for the tip.
-- Golderie

Ardane -- I will cook for Shinorr, and maybe even for a fan or two, but not for you,
buster brown.  You've got a smart mouth, and I dislike that in a man. -- Golderie

     What, you're going to hold a grudge? -- Ardane

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

JACKSON devastated SOLARIS in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge fight.
DARNESHA vanquished LORIS KEY in a 1 minute uneven Challenge battle.
VISION demolished WHERE'S MY TOURNEY? in a 8 minute uneven Challenge Title fight.
GRANDPA RAT was savagely defeated by SANDS in a 2 minute brutal Challenge fight.
BLIND GIRL bested BLACKRAZOR in a action packed 4 minute Challenge brawl.
TEEVELLA was overpowered by TORNADO CXCVI in a 2 minute one-sided Challenge struggle.
NAFISAH overcame CLEMMIE in a 2 minute Challenge fight.
SMITH was handily defeated by LUKARIAN LAMORAK in a 1 minute uneven melee.
SNAKE CHARMER unbelievably bested NIXIE SEASPRITE in a action packed 3 minute fight.
GOKU overpowered RHYNIAN ALANDA in a action packed 2 minute gory one-sided fight.
TALISMAN SHIELDGUARD was overpowered by DEATH FOG in a 1 minute one-sided match.
WOLVERINE was handily defeated by HERO, HERO in a exciting 1 minute one-sided contest.
HUMMEL was devastated by VAJRA VALMEJAR in a crowd pleasing 1 minute mismatched bout.
WARDUKE vanquished GHRYSHAN in a action packed 1 minute gruesome mismatched bout.
VAN HELSING was beaten by RHYNIAN ALANDA in a 2 minute bloody brawl.
CONNOR MACLEOD devastated SARINA in a 2 minute one-sided fight.
KHORNE SHADOWSPAWN subdued LAWRENCE THE SOT in a exciting 1 minute bout.
BABY was overpowered by GO-FER in a 1 minute mismatched fight.
FRY GUY was devastated by GOLDERIE in a 1 minute one-sided contest.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|SLASHING ATTACK                  6         PARRY-STRIKE       7 -   3 -  0      70  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   5         TOTAL PARRY       28 -  13 -  0      68  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      5         AIMED BLOW        36 -  17 -  0      68  |
|AIMED BLOW                       4         LUNGING ATTACK    38 -  28 -  2      58  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      3         PARRY-RIPOSTE     17 -  13 -  1      57  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    3         BASHING ATTACK     9 -   8 -  0      53  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    3         PARRY-LUNGE       12 -  18 -  1      40  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  2         SLASHING ATTACK   21 -  37 -  2      36  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   2         STRIKING ATTACK    7 -  13 -  0      35  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     1         WALL OF STEEL      8 -  28 -  1      22  |

Turn 486 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

STRIKING ATTACK    2 -  0     PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -  2         3  TOTAL PARRY    
AIMED BLOW         3 -  1     SLASHING ATTACK    2 -  4         3  AIMED BLOW     
PARRY-LUNGE        2 -  1     WALL OF STEEL      1 -  2         2  LUNGING ATTACK 
LUNGING ATTACK     3 -  2     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  1         1  SLASHING ATTACK
TOTAL PARRY        3 -  2                                       1  STRIKING ATTACK
BASHING ATTACK     1 -  1                                       1  WALL OF STEEL  

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
TOTAL PARRY      VISION 26-1573            125  53  4  307 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (9)
AIMED BLOW       GOKU 46-3655               94  75  2  237 DRAGONBALL Z (944)
LUNGING ATTACK   LUKARIAN LAMORAK 11-4841   70  92  1  219 SCARLET KNIGHTS (902)
SLASHING ATTACK  SANDS 11-4123              68 139  3  215 SCARLET KNIGHTS (902)
STRIKING ATTACK  VAJRA VALMEJAR 11-4928     70  87  0  209 SCARLET KNIGHTS (902)
WALL OF STEEL    NIXIE SEASPRITE 11-4992    67  80  1  205 SCARLET KNIGHTS (902)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    GRANDPA RAT 22-6549        50  27  3  192 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (978)
PARRY-STRIKE     SMITH 14-1282              96 149  4  190 MIKES (831)
PARRY-LUNGE      HUMMEL 14-1404             93 150  6  188 MIKES (831)
BASHING ATTACK   HERO, HERO 68-446          21  37  0  186 DIAMONDS & RUST (820)

The overall popularity leader is VISION 26-1573.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was VISION 26-1573.  The ten other most popular fighters were BLACKRAZOR 11-4091, 
NIXIE SEASPRITE 11-4992, WHERE'S MY TOURNEY? 82-2893, GOKU 46-3655, DEATH FOG 
45-4017, KHORNE SHADOWSPAWN 46-3809, SANDS 11-4123, TORNADO CXCVI 60-5111, TALISMAN 
SHIELDGUARD 11-4304, and NAFISAH 22-6612.

The least popular fighter this week was FRY GUY 40-3655.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were BABY 43-2863, LORIS KEY 26-4706, SOLARIS 46-3759, GO-FER 26-4444, 
SARINA 26-4220, SMITH 14-1282, TEEVELLA 82-24954, GOLDERIE 26-4657, VAN HELSING 
11-6338, and CLEMMIE 26-4630.

Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  
ARUAK CITY(11)       5  4 0  ZENSU(40)            0  1 0  ARADI(60)            1  0 0  
TOBIR(14)            0  2 0  VEASTIAN(43)         0  1 0  TARRGIR(66)          0  1 0  
SOLVEN(22)           4  1 0  STORMCROWE(45)       1  0 0  FIREHOLD(68)         1  0 0  
CALEAM(26)           3  3 0  ARDIVENT(46)         2  1 0  DWES EG(82)          1  2 0  

TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 LUKARIAN LAMORAK 11-4841    70  92  1  219  SCARLET KNIGHTS (902)      ARUAK CITY
 SMITH 14-1282               96 149  4  190  MIKES (831)                TOBIR
 SNAKE CHARMER 22-6169       49  23  0  223  KELLUMBO'S KIDS (978)      SOLVEN
 VISION 26-1573             125  53  4  307  KELLUMBO'S KIDS (9)        CALEAM
 FRY GUY 40-3655             24  12  0   65  TACO GODS (198)            ZENSU
 BABY 43-2863                26  39  2   37  DARK SIDE (970)            VEASTIAN
 DEATH FOG 45-4017           67  30  0  213  SUPERIOR FORCES (1030)     STORMCROWE
 GOKU 46-3655                94  75  2  237  DRAGONBALL Z (944)         ARDIVENT
 TORNADO CXCVI 60-5111       19  28  0  180  DEATH STUDS VII (877)      ARADI
 WOLVERINE 66-3871           67 122  5  165  X-FORCE (415)              TARRGIR
 HERO, HERO 68-446           21  37  0  186  DIAMONDS & RUST (820)      FIREHOLD
 WHERE'S MY TOURNEY 82-2893  32   4  0  210  THAT TOTALLY SUCKS! (993)  DWES EG

                                  Name-Change-O-Rama

     The summer tourney brought a lot of people to the Isle who didn't appear there 
normally.  This included Commission employees.  Half a dozen arenamasters regarded 
each other warily in the mirror behind the bar at the Pig in a Haystack.  The Pig was 
obscure and mediocre, drawing few gladiators, which is what they had all been looking 
for.  They saw gladiators every day.  Most arenamaster were convinced that this was 
some kind of punishment.
     You could always pick out the arenamasters in a crowd.  There were superficial 
differences:  One of these had clearly Adantri features, one wore an eye-patch, two 
were female.  But there were, in significant ways, alike.  The same size, the same 
hair-trigger alertness, the same deadliness.
     The one-eyed man broke the ice, raising his beer mug in salute.  "I'm Zrof One-
Eye from Zukal.  Sugar of Arvat--"  One of the women bowed slightly.  "I know Sugar.  
The rest of you...?"
     The Adantri matched his salute.  "Dernal of Dayla Kiv."
     "Daiyla Kiv?  Ah...."
     "No, without the 'I' in it.  These damned bureaucrats can't spell, and they 
thought adding an unnecessary vowel was exotic."  Disgust dripped from his voice.
     "Tell me about it!" another man growled in agreement.  "Khagal of Niatoli, and 
what they do to the spelling of THAT simple word--!"
     "I thought Daiyla, I mean Dayla Kiv had a different name right now," 
Arenamistress Sugar said.  "The arena, at least, because of a contest?"
     "Chavez Ravine."  Dernal's tone was the one that substituted in polite company 
for spitting on the floor.
     Zrof blinked, taken aback by the bitterness.  He wouldn't have minded a contest 
in Zukal, and damn what they called the place.  "It's only temporary, though."
     "Temporary, shmiperary," another man muttered.  He seemed well into his drinking, 
although, like all arenamasters, he carried his liquor well.  "They do it all the time 
in Aradi.  No reshpect.  Go around changing thish, changing that.  I wish I could 
change shome thingsh."  He signalled the bartender for a refill.
     The second woman put her hand over his mug.  "You've had enough, Harkon.  Try the 
coffee, instead."
     "You should be mad, too, Ripplesh," Harkon said.  "They're going to do shtuff 
like that in Jahnsh, aren't they?"
     Ripples Dorrigan shrugged.  All the men paused, some with glasses half raised, to 
watch.  "It's the way things are," she said.  "Not much we can do about it."
     "You know," Khagal of Niatoli said, "maybe we could make a few changes.  Fix the 
spelling of Arena 33, for one, change a few standby titles--"
     "The Commission hates changes."  Dernal of Dayla Kiv topped up his glass and 
drained it gloomily.
     "Yes, but if we disguise it," Sugar of Arvat said, excited, "make it... maybe a 
general Name-Change-O-Rama!  Then we could slip OUR changes through and no one would 
notice or mind."

                  *-------*-------*-------*-------*-------*-------* 

     By popular demand, we are holding a Name-Change-o-Rama during the month of 
September, 2008.  If you wish to change the name of your warriors or teams, please 
contact RSI Customer Service.  The charge for a name change is $1.