AD Date : 08/14/2007 Duedate: 09/10/2007 CRYSALIS DM-106 TURN-186 RANK TEAMS W L K % RANK TEAMS W L K % 1 TONGUE N CHE 82/1203 6 3 0 66.7 7-PLATOON 31/1222 3 2 0 60.0 2 REAL BEER 21/859 1858 934 25 66.5 8-EYE OF THE S 54/1164 10 7 0 58.8 WAY TO GO! II 73/1010 9-KNIGHT BREED 45/1070 107 96 1 52.7 D.A. REJECTS 73/352 DARQUE FORCES 31/908 PARTY ANIMALS 5/476 DARQUE FORCES 72/1009 WORLDWIDE GORE 26/35 10 COMMON JOE'S 35/509 481 497 4 49.2 HERE TO PHOENIX 26/871 ONE GOOD DUDE 72/396 MILITARY MAYHEM 31/37 INSP GADGETS MINIONS 7/214 ROYAL FLUSH 47/10 ALL THE MUN'S MEN 37/219 OTTO'S PARTS 52/664 BLACK & BLUE 73/1090 CRUEL PET NAMES 40/1117 DUELING FOR DOLLARS 25/558 3 DARK TOADS 2/1185 217 123 0 63.8 OTAGO HIGHLANDERS 14/808 Z GLADIATORZ 8/1128 11 JANIX 54/1223 91 111 3 45.0 TOADS OF AMBER III 82/1180 THE BEAR'S PAW 47/196 DARK TOADS 05D 82/1184 VALHALLA 28/1102 CAT IN A HAT 33/1159 PLAYPEN 14/1146 CRAZY CREEPS 60/363 12-INDIFFERENCE 47/1221 8 10 0 44.4 SMITHSONIAN 8/250 13 DARKMOON 12/1169 44 58 1 43.1 GOLDEN GLADIATORS 16/577 VILE REAVERS 59/1134 FLOWER GIRLS 52/265 SOL INVICTUS 31/993 COLORIFIC 11/1050 CHAOTICDISORDER 33/1170 PAPER MARIO 5/1224 AUTUMN LIGHTNING 58/1172 MAGIC ARTISTS 78/1218 14 DOGS OF WAR 4/1227 375 647 4 36.7 4-NATURAL B. K 47/1148 13 8 1 61.9 NORTHERN LIGHTS 45/1042 5 OVERRATED 96/1044 81 53 1 60.4 MIDDLE WAY 6 50/1114 MYSTIC ORC FEAST 47/704 15-X-POSSE 72/1093 25 47 2 34.7 UNFIT TO BE ORCS 31/881 16 DRUID'S GROV 50/1041 7 15 1 31.8 WASTED SCUM 47/1112 17 FILIPINA LAD 28/1147 5 18 0 21.7 6 THE OPERA 47/1207 15 10 0 60.0 18-THE SHALLOWSH 4/1206 2 9 0 18.2 SUPERIOR FORCES ZC 71/1109 19-ALL NIGHT LO 31/1220 1 0 0 100 '##/###' Avoid teams by their Team Id '-' Team did not fight this turn THE GUARDIAN'S FORUM Reflections by the Chief Tower Guard What to say, what to say, what to say.... In a nutshell it boils down to incompetence. That's right, Slugbait stunk it up again. Despite scheming, wheezling, a bribe here or there and to be honest just plain benign neglect the Slugbait syndicate ended up with not one but two Duelmastership. As you all well know there is nothing that my little sniveling boss hates more than the "responsibilities," the "political points" and frankly being forced out into the light of day by having one of his precious warriors winning the title. Much less two. I think the direct quote was "What the bleep were you doing! Scared to take a punch or two and lay down?" Oh well, it is what is. Maybe I complete this rambling diatribe with a the history of little old me: Random Matchup. I'm not one of you pretty boys that joined the gladiatorial ranks for "glory," "fame" or even money. No, I was a bread baker who happened to get a little sossed one night and next thing I know I'm in plate armor with a shortsword in my hand. Shanghaied. All the warriors in the face-to-face bloodgames are supposed to be convicts but maybe not all the managers out there follow the rules to the letter of the law. I learned real quick that the only way out of the bloodgames was to win. So, I finished of my first two opponents real quick. Bam, 2-0-2. Then I fight three matches against this Aimed Blow named Corran. You know the type: a moronic midget, head to toe plate and more con than common sense. Despite that he is a little monster 4-0-4 but after three fights in a row I'm 6-3-2 and he is 6-3-4. Slugbait points me at some stiff named EZ and it sure was "easy" to get to 6-3-3. My last fight was a win against Manalger, another AB. I win and end up 7-3-3 and I'm sure that I'm going to visit the DA. But, no, the guys ahead of my shank it and end up getting killed. Incompetence, story of my life. I'm of to the Isle where I've done better than expected with one TV and a couple of close 10th round losses. Hopefully someone will step up and grab the crown. Good luck. REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER Yes, well, if you're going to actually READ this stuff, I suppose I should give it a little thought. Early in the morning for thought. Almost any time is too early in the morning for thought. Although not to early for fights, and we had thirty-six of them. Not bad. In fact, darned good. No arena on the Isle except Talahya and Primus can match us in fights, and they don't count. And NO other arena on the Isle can match us in sociability. This is what comes of moving at a slower pace and taking the time to do things right. Of course, with the longest fights taking a mere six minutes (two were tied for that), I have to wonder whether some significant part of "moving at a slower pace" has perhaps slipped your minds? In the past we've had fights that have taken HOURS, days, even occasionally WEEKS to reach a conclusion, and now... six minutes? Pfui. Still, we take what we can get, and they tell me that the very long fights resulted in the death of whole groves of trees. The holder of our title, of the Crysaline helm, received the most challenges today, NINE. This is very, very good. This is a clear sign that people care. Or possibly that they don't like Random Matchup sitting at the top of the pyramind. Mystic Orc Feast was most avoided, due probably to some dark rumors about just what Mystic Orcs eat when they get together. It is NOT true that Mystic Orcs eat their table mates when they feast. Fact, people who have gone to dinner with Mystic Orcs have returned alive. It's the Existential Orcs you have to worry about. Most avoiding the Mystic Orc Feasters this month was Here to Phoenix. And what do THEY eat, eh? Thirty-six fights, involving a mere TWO standbys, which is very good. Thirteen challenges, one of them TV. LADY CONSOLACION (28-3703) (23-33-2,54) of FILIPINA LADYZ fought JEZEBEL (4- 4954) (23-19-0,88) of DOGS OF WAR. LADY CONSOLACION demolished JEZEBEL in an exciting 1 minute gory uneven competition. And who is this Jezebel who has just appeared in our midst? Obviously Lady Consolacion had some ideas as to, if not who, what Jezebel was. Is, I suppose. Leopards don't change their spots, and neither do dogs. WOZZECK (47-5644) (15-9-1,68) of THE OPERA fought HELENE DE TROI (4-5154) (17- 15-0,66) of DOGS OF WAR. WOZZECK vanquished HELENE DE TROI in a 1 minute mismatched bout. Another inept Dog, not that I would intend in accidental insult to Helene by that name. All my insults are deliberate. I have heard it whispered that the Dogs of War arrived to fight the Shallowship, and I hope the Shallowship are taking note of this. SUPER CHE (4-5269) (20-20-1,81) of DOGS OF WAR fought SIPPYCUP SAM (14-4280) (18-17-3,61) of PLAYPEN. SUPER CHE was handily defeated by SIPPYCUP SAM in a popular 1 minute uneven match. And if this is a fair measure of the Dogs of War, then we're looking at a long stretch of peace here. BLACK FLAG (82-46046) (21-13-3,63) of TONGUE N CHEEK fought LITTLE DEVIL (14- 4359) (18-17-0,46) of PLAYPEN. BLACK FLAG viciously subdued LITTLE DEVIL in an exciting 4 minute brutal fight. Excellent strategy there, Black Flag! I have to admit that I wouldn't have thought of using the flag as a gag on that little devil. G.A. CUSTER (4-5376) (20-18-2,80) of DOGS OF WAR fought XYCO (54-2899) (16-10- 2,70) of JANIX. G.A. CUSTER demolished XYCO in an exciting 1 minute mismatched match. Obviously, this is a dog of a different color. But if Xyco could bring in a few sues to assist, who knows how the next match might go? LYSISTRATA (4-5389) (23-10-1,80) of DOGS OF WAR fought ALASTARIAN DESERTER (106- 1) (0-0-0,30) of the College of Mimes. LYSISTRATA slaughtered ALASTARIAN DESERTER in a 1 minute mismatched fight. And who tossed that poor Mime at a lady with a serious temper? Definitely a bad match, and I wonder whether the bookies are sufficiently annoyed with the standbys to have arranged this example? There are some curious stories going around. PERICLES (4-5531) (23-24-2,95) of DOGS OF WAR fought LADY DOMINGA (28-3702) (18- 38-0,51) of FILIPINA LADYZ. PERICLES was overpowered by LADY DOMINGA in a 1 minute bloody one-sided fray. Definitely, the Ladyz don't like the Dogs of War. Male Chauvinists of the world unite and strike back! BLUE BLOOD (73-3657) (17-10-1,92) of BLACK & BLUE fought EPIMONIDAS (4-5683) (20-20-0,80) of DOGS OF WAR. BLUE BLOOD overpowered EPIMONIDAS in an exciting 1 minute one-sided fight. And how, we must wonder, did these dogs even manage to graduate? I know Jhelum is a small arena these days, but this crew is ridiculous. Sink them all, Shallowship! MANI (31-5102) (24-26-4,97) of SOL INVICTUS fought SHERMAN (4-5391) (17-12-1,64) of DOGS OF WAR. MANI handily defeated SHERMAN in an exciting 1 minute one-sided fight. Does it strike you that there are rather a LOT of dogs around today? Silver gets you gold that the numbers on the sands will be sharply reduced by next month. CUBA (26-3917) (23-9-0,100) of HERE TO PHOENIX fought HORAGALLES (31-5212) (19- 17-2,88) of SOL INVICTUS. CUBA was overpowered by HORAGALLES in a 1 minute uneven fight. So, Cuba, was this as bad as a Mystic Orc Feast? LOOGIE CLAP (82-46049) (23-12-2,92) of TONGUE N CHEEK fought BETSY (4-5214) (20- 27-3,90) of DOGS OF WAR. LOOGIE CLAP handily defeated BETSY in a 2 minute one-sided duel. It is to yawn. Definitely a worthless mutt. HUNGRY BONES (31-4720) (21-14-1,148) of UNFIT TO BE ORCS fought JIMMY CUSTER (4- 6268) (23-25-2,96) of DOGS OF WAR. HUNGRY BONES overpowered JIMMY CUSTER in a 1 minute one-sided fray. A question: If Hungry is unfit to be an orc, what is he/she/it fit for? What are the criteria of fitness to be orcs? DIAMOND (82-33259) (11-2-0,171) of DARK TOADS 05D fought GENERAL PUBLIC (31- 3112) (20-18-1,116) of MILITARY MAYHEM. DIAMOND vanquished GENERAL PUBLIC in an action packed 1 minute uneven bout. Not a good day for the military type of any persuasion, it seems. WRETCHEDMISERY (33-7255) (34-23-0,173) of CHAOTICDISORDER fought ADAM'S APPLE (52-3203) (23-11-0,111) of OTTO'S PARTS. WRETCHEDMISERY overpowered ADAM'S APPLE in a popular 1 minute brutal one-sided duel. Does this mean that Adam choked, wretchedly, on the apple? It WAS his fault, you know. He could have refused. BODDINGTON'S (21-5035) (22-12-0,162) of REAL BEER fought DEMONICHELLION (33- 7038) (29-30-2,101) of CHAOTICDISORDER. BODDINGTON'S overpowered DEMONICHELLION in an exciting 1 minute uneven fight. Ah, so demons can be made drunk and then more easily dealt with? I will have to remember that, and so should other people. A lot of trouble could be avoided this way. BEARNICE (47-2847) (29-37-7,164) of THE BEAR'S PAW fought HARI-KARI (73-3049) (14-4-0,121) of WAY TO GO! II. BEARNICE was handily defeated by HARI-KARI in an exciting 1 minute one-sided contest. But nobody "went." Probably just as well, leave that Alastarian Deserter to pass through the fire of resurrection alone. He whines. WHEEL OF FORTUNE (25-2529) (50-45-2,210) of DUELING FOR DOLLARS fought DAIRY QUEEN (47-2685) (75-42-3,203) of ROYAL FLUSH. WHEEL OF FORTUNE was beaten by DAIRY QUEEN in an action packed 2 minute fray. Ah, one forgets that sometimes fortune does NOT favor... even itself. DUTCH TREAT (26-1841) (99-36-2,201) of WORLDWIDE GORE fought RIRORNI CAPTAIN (106-26) (0-0-0,200) of the College of Mimes. DUTCH TREAT won victory over RIRORNI CAPTAIN in a 2 minute match. Now the Captain will have to pay for everything. Serves him right. NEWT GINGRICH (5-3399) (83-28-0,202) of PARTY ANIMALS fought WEINERMUN (37-2635) (57-52-3,194) of ALL THE MUN'S MEN. NEWT GINGRICH devastated WEINERMUN in a 1 minute one-sided bout. Ah, but I fear the setting for this devastation began when Newt walked out carrying a long bun and squirt-bottle full of mustard. Though he spared us all the pickle relish, for which I am thankful. PAT (35-2292) (44-44-2,215) of COMMON JOE'S fought JACK VALTRAEDS (47-407) (106- 68-2,193) of ROYAL FLUSH. PAT was narrowly defeated by JACK VALTRAEDS in a crowd pleasing 4 minute bloody fight. Having lasted so well, Pat has proved himself an UN- common joe. MORTICIAN (2-3890) (78-20-1,234) of DARK TOADS fought KING FORADAY (47-3762) (56-48-4,188) of ROYAL FLUSH. MORTICIAN savagely defeated KING FORADAY in an exciting 3 minute brutal match. This Mortician is a failure as an intimidator. If he was TRULY intent on filling up his cemetary, he would be out there killing people right and left. But do we see a large tally of deaths on his record? Not so. If he is spreading death, it is among the non-gladiatorial population, and who cares about them, eh? WHACKING WILLOW (52-3167) (42-10-1,261) of FLOWER GIRLS fought MAD CAT (7-2965) (55-37-6,200) of INSP GADGETS MINIONS. WHACKING WILLOW was viciously subdued by MAD CAT in a crowd pleasing 4 minute brawl. A well-matched pair, when you come down to it. But I hadn't realized we had so many voyeurs in the crowd. BEAR ACUDA (47-4995) (31-21-1,232) of THE BEAR'S PAW fought FOUNTAIN TROLL (73- 643) (83-26-2,359) of D.A. REJECTS. BEAR ACUDA was devastated by FOUNTAIN TROLL in a 2 minute brutal uneven duel. Though you may not realize it, this Fountain Troll IS one of the "dangerous monsters of the bathtub." But he never fights dirty. And now, the challenge matches: FRED BEAR (47-5348) (20-11-0,87) of THE BEAR'S PAW challenged ROXANNE DE'MORRE (50-3449) (25-22-0,65) of DRUID'S GROVE. Down 22. FRED BEAR viciously subdued ROXANNE DE'MORRE in a 5 minute Challenge fight. Easy to see why: The Bear thought she was a honey tree and ripped her apart with his claws. It's what bears do. MOSGIEL (14-3836) (26-13-1,102) of OTAGO HIGHLANDERS challenged URG GUTSPILLER (59-2561) (24-14-1,108) of VILE REAVERS. Up 6. MOSGIEL was devastated by URG GUTSPILLER in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge bout. Yes, fine, Urg won. But WHO is going to clean up all those spilled guts? The janitors have lodged a protest. UNCERTAIN OMELET (47-3786) (21-9-0,188) of MYSTIC ORC FEAST challenged SPATHA (31-4996) (39-34-2,187) of SOL INVICTUS. Down 1. UNCERTAIN OMELET was viciously subdued by SPATHA in a 2 minute Challenge contest. Sliced and diced to a fare-thee- well. I've never seen sliced scrambled eggs before. I'm not sure I want to see them again, either. All that, er, catsup. FIGHTER ACE (47-1189) (68-47-6,194) of ROYAL FLUSH challenged SOUL SCOURGE (59- 2589) (32-12-0,194) of VILE REAVERS. Straight across. FIGHTER ACE demolished SOUL SCOURGE in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match. An ace is, after all, an ace when you come down to it. AGLIBOL (12-5848) (38-33-1,184) of DARKMOON challenged BLUE VELVET (11-6248) (29-11-0,185) of COLORIFIC. Up 1. AGLIBOL was savagely defeated by BLUE VELVET in a popular 6 minute Challenge melee. One of our two longest fights, and a bit of a puzzle. I couldn't see what exactly Blue Velvet was up to, what with the moon going dark over us at that instant. I'm sure we missed something good. ARTEMISIA (12-5096) (46-48-0,189) of DARKMOON challenged PHILLIP THE BIRD (40- 3708) (17-10-1,190) of CRUEL PET NAMES. Up 1. ARTEMISIA won victory over PHILLIP THE BIRD in a popular 4 minute gory Challenge duel. Poor Phillip had to walk the plank. Good thing there was only sand underneath. I don't believe he's a swimming bird. DUNEDIN (14-3703) (31-48-0,181) of OTAGO HIGHLANDERS challenged BALDER (28-3778) (28-24-3,181) of VALHALLA. Straight across. DUNEDIN lost to BALDER in an action packed 4 minute gory Challenge duel. Ah... bit of embarrassment there for Dunedin, but we may hope he learned well from it. At the least, not to challenge Balder again soon. DISCO QUEEN (47-1992) (44-24-1,190) of ROYAL FLUSH challenged BRIARTHORN (12- 5671) (42-37-2,200) of DARKMOON. Up 10. DISCO QUEEN slimly won victory over BRIARTHORN in a 6 minute Challenge fight. And what other kind of victory could it be, since Disco Queen is deliciously slim? Although six minutes of those dazzling lights flashing on and off and back and forth... headache city. STIGMA OF STUPID (31-4948) (34-16-1,203) of UNFIT TO BE ORCS challenged BALCLUTHA (14-3169) (32-42-1,203) of OTAGO HIGHLANDERS. Straight across. We're seeing a lot of that today. Which is fine, just an observation. STIGMA OF STUPID was overpowered by BALCLUTHA in a 1 minute Challenge struggle. So, you see how Stigma got that name. BOARISH YELTSIN (5-3109) (65-43-2,310) of PARTY ANIMALS challenged THE WHEAT KING (58-5407) (75-57-2,257) of AUTUMN LIGHTNING. Down 53. BOARISH YELTSIN overpowered THE WHEAT KING in a 2 minute mismatched Challenge match. Does this mean that Boarish is anti-wheat? A strict carnivore, perhaps? KING UVDAHELL (47-1643) (50-25-1,233) of ROYAL FLUSH challenged GRINNON BEARIT (47-2955) (44-30-4,302) of THE BEAR'S PAW. Up 69. KING UVDAHELL was subdued by GRINNON BEARIT in an exciting 2 minute Challenge melee. And Grinnon maintained that maddening, ah, expression the whole time. Probably why it was only a two-minute fight. If you're not careful, you know, your face freezes that way. Our tourney victor, TOADKILLER DOG (47-1103) (34-15-1,206) of WASTED SCUM TV challenged BRAND (82-13289) (44-31-1,210) of TOADS OF AMBER III. Up 4. TOADKILLER DOG was viciously subdued by BRAND in a 2 minute Challenge fight. There was a certain attractive symmetry about the Toadkiller challenging a Toad, but it was not to be. At least, not today. And for the title, one of nine challengers, CRUMBSNATCHER (72-1842) (50-31- 1,214) of ONE GOOD DUDE challenged RANDOM MATCHUP (96-1048) (33-14-4,271) of OVERRATED. Up 57, if I mistake not the math. CRUMBSNATCHER overpowered RANDOM MATCHUP in a 1 minute Challenge Title duel. And this is no crumb that has been snatched from the jaws of Random Matchup! A salute to Crumbsnatcher! Ketchum THE TOWER GUARDIAN W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY CRUMBSNATCHER 72-1842 51 31 1 235 ONE GOOD DUDE (396) DRAGONHEAD GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY FOUNTAIN TROLL 73-643 84 26 2 375 D.A. REJECTS (352) ERINIKA BOARISH YELTSIN 5-3109 66 43 2 332 PARTY ANIMALS (476) KALTOS GRINNON BEARIT 47-2955 45 30 4 323 THE BEAR'S PAW (196) NORTH FORK MORTICIAN 2-3890 79 20 1 243 DARK TOADS (1185) NIANIA BRAND 82-13289 45 31 1 228 TOADS OF AMBER III (1180) DWES EG -RAVISHING REDBUD 52-3197 35 12 0 227 FLOWER GIRLS (265) FRATSFA MAD CAT 7-2965 56 37 6 224 INSP GADGETS MINIONS (214) BONSUR BALCLUTHA 14-3169 33 42 1 223 OTAGO HIGHLANDERS (808) TOBIR FIGHTER ACE 47-1189 69 47 6 215 ROYAL FLUSH (10) NORTH FORK NEWT GINGRICH 5-3399 84 28 0 213 PARTY ANIMALS (476) KALTOS DAIRY QUEEN 47-2685 76 42 3 212 ROYAL FLUSH (10) NORTH FORK GRAND CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY DUTCH TREAT 26-1841 100 36 2 207 WORLDWIDE GORE (35) CALEAM WHEEL OF FORTUNE 25-2529 50 46 2 207 DUELING FOR DOLLARS (558) LYRATILAN DISCO QUEEN 47-1992 45 24 1 206 ROYAL FLUSH (10) NORTH FORK BEAR ACUDA 47-4995 31 22 1 206 THE BEAR'S PAW (196) NORTH FORK -EVE 72-4596 26 13 0 206 DARQUE FORCES (1009) DRAGONHEAD JACK VALTRAEDS 47-407 107 68 2 205 ROYAL FLUSH (10) NORTH FORK PAT 35-2292 44 45 2 204 COMMON JOE'S (509) MURSKA -SODOM 31-4368 33 20 1 204 DARQUE FORCES (908) CHIMLEVTAL KING FORADAY 47-3762 56 49 4 202 ROYAL FLUSH (10) NORTH FORK ARTEMISIA 12-5096 47 48 0 202 DARKMOON (1169) RIZTAB SPATHA 31-4996 40 34 2 202 SOL INVICTUS (993) CHIMLEVTAL WHACKING WILLOW 52-3167 42 11 1 201 FLOWER GIRLS (265) FRATSFA WEINERMUN 37-2635 57 53 3 200 ALL THE MUN'S MEN (219) SIBIKHAS GRAND CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY KING UVDAHELL 47-1643 50 26 1 200 ROYAL FLUSH (10) NORTH FORK TOADKILLER DOG 47-1103 34 16 1 200 WASTED SCUM (1112) NORTH FORK BRIARTHORN 12-5671 42 38 2 198 DARKMOON (1169) RIZTAB -CANNONBALL 72-5313 25 29 1 198 X-POSSE (1093) DRAGONHEAD THE WHEAT KING 58-5407 75 58 2 197 AUTUMN LIGHTNING (1172) DELARQ TOR BLUE VELVET 11-6248 30 11 0 196 COLORIFIC (1050) ARUAK CITY RANDOM MATCHUP 96-1048 33 15 4 195 OVERRATED (1044) OLD VALAMANTIS STIGMA OF STUPID 31-4948 34 17 1 191 UNFIT TO BE ORCS (881) CHIMLEVTAL SOUL SCOURGE 59-2589 32 13 0 190 VILE REAVERS (1134) ILLIS BALDER 28-3778 29 24 3 189 VALHALLA (1102) MORYA AGLIBOL 12-5848 38 34 1 187 DARKMOON (1169) RIZTAB UNCERTAIN OMELET 47-3786 21 10 0 187 MYSTIC ORC FEAST (704) NORTH FORK PHILLIP THE BIRD 40-3708 17 11 1 187 CRUEL PET NAMES (1117) ZENSU -FIVE GOLDEN RINGS 16-4331 37 7 0 184 GOLDEN GLADIATORS (577) WILLAF GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY DUNEDIN 14-3703 31 49 0 180 OTAGO HIGHLANDERS (808) TOBIR WRETCHEDMISERY 33-7255 35 23 0 175 CHAOTICDISORDER (1170) NIATOLI ISLAND DIAMOND 82--32277 12 2 0 173 DARK TOADS 05D (1184) DWES EG -SNOWFALL 45-3473 46 35 1 165 NORTHERN LIGHTS (1042) STORMCROWE BODDINGTON'S 21-5035 23 12 0 164 REAL BEER (859) SUNSET -SCORPIUS 45-3752 34 17 0 157 KNIGHT BREED (1070) STORMCROWE HARI-KARI 73-3049 15 4 0 154 WAY TO GO! II (1010) ERINIKA GRAND ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY HUNGRY BONES 31-4720 22 14 1 150 UNFIT TO BE ORCS (881) CHIMLEVTAL -GILIA HARN 50-3391 34 38 0 143 MIDDLE WAY 6 (1114) SNOWBOUND -ZIT 8-4385 24 3 0 141 Z GLADIATORZ (1128) ARKERS BEARNICE 47-2847 29 38 7 135 THE BEAR'S PAW (196) NORTH FORK -SHARD 45-3507 28 43 1 130 NORTHERN LIGHTS (1042) STORMCROWE -TINY TIM 60-6042 24 7 1 128 CRAZY CREEPS (363) ARADI URG GUTSPILLER 59-2561 25 14 1 124 VILE REAVERS (1134) ILLIS GENERAL PUBLIC 31-3112 20 19 1 123 MILITARY MAYHEM (37) CHIMLEVTAL -HOLLAN INNIS 50-3388 32 33 0 122 MIDDLE WAY 6 (1114) SNOWBOUND ADAM'S APPLE 52-3203 23 12 0 120 OTTO'S PARTS (664) FRATSFA -LIONESS 33-7222 20 4 0 120 CAT IN A HAT (1159) NIATOLI ISLAND -ELLITA FESS 50-3392 36 35 1 119 MIDDLE WAY 6 (1114) SNOWBOUND -TOM SAWYER 8-4281 22 9 0 119 SMITHSONIAN (250) ARKERS -ARAGANT 4-6220 33 21 0 118 THE SHALLOWSHIP (1206) JHELUM DEMONICHELLION 33-7038 29 31 2 109 CHAOTICDISORDER (1170) NIATOLI ISLAND MANI 31-5102 25 26 4 103 SOL INVICTUS (993) CHIMLEVTAL LOOGIE CLAP 82--19487 24 12 2 102 TONGUE N CHEEK (1203) DWES EG GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY -WHITE SETTLER 47-5322 25 14 2 100 NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 (1148 NORTH FORK JIMMY CUSTER 4-6268 23 26 2 100 DOGS OF WAR (1227) JHELUM HORAGALLES 31-5212 20 17 2 100 SOL INVICTUS (993) CHIMLEVTAL BLUE BLOOD 73-3657 18 10 1 100 BLACK & BLUE (1090) ERINIKA -LADY HUNTSMAN 30-4579 29 12 0 99 LENPROS (189) IAYE -WIMPERETTA 54-2655 27 17 1 99 TRADERS OF TROCAR (1027) TROCAR MOSGIEL 14-3836 26 14 1 97 OTAGO HIGHLANDERS (808) TOBIR -GIMLET 4-6218 24 32 2 92 THE SHALLOWSHIP (1206) JHELUM FRED BEAR 47-5348 21 11 0 91 THE BEAR'S PAW (196) NORTH FORK GRAND INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY -AMYTHEST 16-3446 18 33 0 87 MAXIMUM RESULTS (420) WILLAF CUBA 26-3917 23 10 0 85 HERE TO PHOENIX (871) CALEAM LADY CONSOLACION 28-3703 24 33 2 84 FILIPINA LADYZ (1147) MORYA LADY DOMINGA 28-3702 19 38 0 83 FILIPINA LADYZ (1147) MORYA SIPPYCUP SAM 14-4280 19 17 3 82 PLAYPEN (1146) TOBIR WOZZECK 47-5644 16 9 1 79 THE OPERA (1207) NORTH FORK -FROSTFLARE 45-4112 21 18 1 76 NORTHERN LIGHTS (1042) STORMCROWE -SUNFLASH 45-3474 32 49 1 71 NORTHERN LIGHTS (1042) STORMCROWE GRAND INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY ROXANNE DE'MORRE 50-3449 25 23 0 70 DRUID'S GROVE (1041) SNOWBOUND BLACK FLAG 82--19490 22 13 3 68 TONGUE N CHEEK (1203) DWES EG -LADY MACBETH 8-4627 20 6 0 66 SMITHSONIAN (250) ARKERS -LEGALASS 4-6217 26 30 1 65 THE SHALLOWSHIP (1206) JHELUM -TWINK 5-4396 18 9 2 65 PAPER MARIO (1224) KALTOS XYCO 54-2899 16 11 2 64 JANIX (1223) TROCAR -WASTELANDER 54-2134 20 16 1 63 EYE OF THE STORM (1164) TROCAR -<ERASER> 71-5644 18 9 0 63 SUPERIOR FORCES ZC (1109) KYR'TERR -SCANDALF 4-6219 26 31 0 62 THE SHALLOWSHIP (1206) JHELUM -POSEIDONIS 31-5540 15 8 1 54 AVENGERS (259) CHIMLEVTAL -MORWHEN 47-5686 15 6 2 53 LOST SOULS (1225) NORTH FORK LITTLE DEVIL 14-4359 18 18 0 50 PLAYPEN (1146) TOBIR -FENDER GRALE 50-3389 22 44 2 44 MIDDLE WAY 6 (1114) SNOWBOUND '-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn. THE DEAD W L K TEAM NAME SLAIN BY TURN ALASTARIAN DESERTER 106-1 0 1 0 1 LYSISTRATA 4-5389 186 PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE Crip -- Sure, sure. Running away from us are you? -- The Consortium Folk But you might be contagious! Crumbsnatcher -- I am feeling blue and not velvet plus both crummy and snatched. -- Blue Velvet "SODOM was bested by RAVISHING REDBUD in a popular 5 minute Challenge contest. Both parties came out of the arena with goofy grins on their faces. Make of it what you will." Our spymaster is sooooo funny, is it not? -- The Flower Girls and their camp followers You mean... someone actually READS that stuff? Urg Gutspiller -- Gee, I really had a great time with you. Thanks for letting me call on you. Did you like my paintbrush? -- Tom Sawyer Why has he got vertical white stripes? Hollan Innis -- Ringing? Ringing? Hmmmmm. Perhaps my ukulele was out of tune? But it surely was effective, wasn't it? (wink) -- Tiny Tim Briarthorn -- You avoided the casket. Lucky you. -- Mortician You weren't going to offer your BEST one? Good luck to all Crysalisers at The Atlanta Face. Bring home some glory to our fine arena. A salute to all here. -- The Consortium Elders Or should that be Crysalizers? Crip -- Thanks for the welcome. As for Tongue N Cheek being Max's, I am sure he is glad it isn't. I was never quite able to make it as successful a team as I wanted. I don't recall our teams meeting much in North Fork but I do have a couple old fights vs Perfect Ten. Maybe I kept them 'cause my guys won both of them. Look forward to more meetings here. -- Wretch Master Darque -- Thanks for the welcome. Can't wait to see how my guys do against yours at a higher level of DM. -- Wretch All -- Thanks for the welcome. Sorry I have been slow to reply; my head has been in the clouds for the last month or so. Should be more hands on now. -- Wretch Random Matchup -- You are quite the Tower Guardian. But how is it that you made it out of blood games and I was only in the regular arena and I have more kills then you? -- Mad Cat Natural talent. Blue Velvet -- I hope that none of the Crumbs that took got stuck in your nice soft velvet. -- Crumbsnatcher Eve -- Man, does my head hurt. I might have a concussion. -- Dunedin Crip -- If I am lucky and I can get just a couple of trains. Before I go off to primus I should have 3 more ratings just like the one you saw. -- Balclutha Bearnice -- But you never are. Still, the good news is, I get to retire! In fact, I should be retired by the time you read this. -- Gilia Harn Tiny Tim -- Sorry, but I never did care for tulips. -- Hollan Innis P.S. Or ukeleles. P.P.S. The beard is really freaky. No, it'd be a fine beard if he combed it. Or maybe braided it. Mani -- Odd, the weather we've been having, I expected you to triumph in a sweaty slide. -- Ellita Fess P.S. Not that I'm complaining! A win on the way out the door has great appeal. Soul Scourge -- Okay, that was moderately vile, and in the middle of a heat wave, too! Injury to insult. -- Snowfall Cheating Manager? Oh, YEAH, take him DOWN. -- Shard Demonichellion -- I don't have the energy for this today. -- Sunflash Sippycup Sam -- Better get rid of that milk if you want to win fights. -- Frostflare Horagalles -- Either this is the hour of gall, or gaul, as the case might be, or I have a phobia against suspenders. Either way, I am retiring and don't actually care lots. -- Fender Grale P.S. But I'm sure that was well done of you. Fare well to all you gladiators of Crysalis. The Middle Way and Northern Lights are going into eclipse and the Dogs of War (from Jhelum) are taking their places. By special request! -- Jorja Just as a question, is the Consortium trying to trigger the return of the Regional Arena News by miscalling regional allegiences (Arvat as Delarquan and Arkers as Free Blades), do you think? It might be too subtle to get the message across. -- Jorja, mildly curious P.S. Does this signify the break-up of the Andorian League? Is all Alastari falling into an Age of Chaos? Probably an insidious plot of some kind. LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS TOADKILLER DOG was viciously subdued by BRAND in a 2 minute Challenge fight. KING UVDAHELL was subdued by GRINNON BEARIT in a exciting 2 minute Challenge melee. CRUMBSNATCHER overpowered RANDOM MATCHUP in a 1 minute Challenge Title duel. BOARISH YELTSIN overpowered THE WHEAT KING in a 2 minute mismatched Challenge match. STIGMA OF STUPID was overpowered by BALCLUTHA in a 1 minute Challenge struggle. DISCO QUEEN slimly won victory over BRIARTHORN in a 6 minute Challenge fight. DUNEDIN lost to BALDER in a action packed 4 minute gory Challenge duel. ARTEMISIA won victory over PHILLIP THE BIRD in a popular 4 minute gory Challenge duel. AGLIBOL was savagely defeated by BLUE VELVET in a popular 6 minute Challenge melee. FIGHTER ACE demolished SOUL SCOURGE in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match. UNCERTAIN OMELET was viciously subdued by SPATHA in a 2 minute Challenge contest. MOSGIEL was devastated by URG GUTSPILLER in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge bout. FRED BEAR viciously subdued ROXANNE DE'MORRE in a 5 minute Challenge fight. BEAR ACUDA was devastated by FOUNTAIN TROLL in a 2 minute brutal uneven duel. WHACKING WILLOW was viciously subdued by MAD CAT in a crowd pleasing 4 minute brawl. MORTICIAN savagely defeated KING FORADAY in a exciting 3 minute brutal match. PAT was narrowly defeated by JACK VALTRAEDS in a crowd pleasing 4 minute bloody fight. NEWT GINGRICH devastated WEINERMUN in a 1 minute one-sided bout. DUTCH TREAT won victory over RIRORNI CAPTAIN in a 2 minute match. WHEEL OF FORTUNE was beaten by DAIRY QUEEN in a action packed 2 minute fray. BEARNICE was handily defeated by HARI-KARI in a exciting 1 minute one-sided contest. BODDINGTON'S overpowered DEMONICHELLION in a exciting 1 minute uneven fight. WRETCHEDMISERY overpowered ADAM'S APPLE in a popular 1 minute brutal one-sided duel. DIAMOND vanquished GENERAL PUBLIC in a action packed 1 minute uneven bout. HUNGRY BONES overpowered JIMMY CUSTER in a 1 minute one-sided fray. LOOGIE CLAP handily defeated BETSY in a 2 minute one-sided duel. CUBA was overpowered by HORAGALLES in a 1 minute uneven fight. MANI handily defeated SHERMAN in a exciting 1 minute one-sided fight. BLUE BLOOD overpowered EPIMONIDAS in a exciting 1 minute one-sided fight. PERICLES was overpowered by LADY DOMINGA in a 1 minute bloody one-sided fray. LYSISTRATA slaughtered ALASTARIAN DESERTER in a 1 minute mismatched fight. G.A. CUSTER demolished XYCO in a exciting 1 minute mismatched match. BLACK FLAG viciously subdued LITTLE DEVIL in a exciting 4 minute brutal fight. SUPER CHE was handily defeated by SIPPYCUP SAM in a popular 1 minute uneven match. WOZZECK vanquished HELENE DE TROI in a 1 minute mismatched bout. LADY CONSOLACION demolished JEZEBEL in a exciting 1 minute gory uneven competition. BATTLE REPORT MOST POPULAR RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS |FIGHTING STYLE FIGHTS FIGHTING STYLE W - L - K PERCENT| |LUNGING ATTACK 16 TOTAL PARRY 79 - 42 - 0 65 | |WALL OF STEEL 13 STRIKING ATTACK 33 - 21 - 1 61 | |TOTAL PARRY 10 LUNGING ATTACK 87 - 73 - 1 54 | |SLASHING ATTACK 7 SLASHING ATTACK 42 - 36 - 1 54 | |AIMED BLOW 7 WALL OF STEEL 42 - 44 - 2 49 | |BASHING ATTACK 5 AIMED BLOW 33 - 35 - 0 49 | |STRIKING ATTACK 4 PARRY-RIPOSTE 23 - 31 - 2 43 | |PARRY-RIPOSTE 3 BASHING ATTACK 19 - 37 - 0 34 | |PARRY-LUNGE 3 PARRY-STRIKE 4 - 8 - 0 33 | |PARRY-STRIKE 2 PARRY-LUNGE 15 - 30 - 1 33 | Turn 186 was great if you Not so great if you used The fighting styles of the used the fighting styles: the fighting styles: top eleven warriors are: STRIKING ATTACK 3 - 1 WALL OF STEEL 6 - 7 4 LUNGING ATTACK BASHING ATTACK 3 - 2 AIMED BLOW 3 - 4 3 TOTAL PARRY TOTAL PARRY 6 - 4 PARRY-RIPOSTE 1 - 2 2 SLASHING ATTACK SLASHING ATTACK 4 - 3 PARRY-LUNGE 0 - 3 1 WALL OF STEEL LUNGING ATTACK 9 - 7 1 BASHING ATTACK PARRY-STRIKE 1 - 1 TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME WALL OF STEEL CRUMBSNATCHER 72-1842 51 31 1 235 ONE GOOD DUDE (396) FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME TOTAL PARRY FOUNTAIN TROLL 73-643 84 26 2 375 D.A. REJECTS (352) SLASHING ATTACK BOARISH YELTSIN 5-3109 66 43 2 332 PARTY ANIMALS (476) LUNGING ATTACK GRINNON BEARIT 47-2955 45 30 4 323 THE BEAR'S PAW (196) BASHING ATTACK MAD CAT 7-2965 56 37 6 224 INSP GADGETS MINIONS (214) PARRY-STRIKE DISCO QUEEN 47-1992 45 24 1 206 ROYAL FLUSH (10) PARRY-LUNGE BEAR ACUDA 47-4995 31 22 1 206 THE BEAR'S PAW (196) PARRY-RIPOSTE JACK VALTRAEDS 47-407 107 68 2 205 ROYAL FLUSH (10) STRIKING ATTACK STIGMA OF STUPID 31-4948 34 17 1 191 UNFIT TO BE ORCS (881) AIMED BLOW AGLIBOL 12-5848 38 34 1 187 DARKMOON (1169) The overall popularity leader is JACK VALTRAEDS 47-407. The most popular warrior this turn was MAD CAT 7-2965. The ten other most popular fighters were BLUE VELVET 11-6248, PHILLIP THE BIRD 40-3708, DUNEDIN 14-3703, BRAND 82-13289, DISCO QUEEN 47-1992, BALDER 28-3778, AGLIBOL 12-5848, BLACK FLAG 82--19490, BOARISH YELTSIN 5-3109, and LITTLE DEVIL 14-4359. The least popular fighter this week was HELENE DE TROI 4-5154. The other ten least popular fighters were SUPER CHE 4-5269, PERICLES 4-5531, SHERMAN 4-5391, CUBA 26-3917, JIMMY CUSTER 4-6268, WEINERMUN 37-2635, MOSGIEL 14-3836, SOUL SCOURGE 59-2589, XYCO 54-2899, and EPIMONIDAS 4-5683. Arena (Number) W L K Arena (Number) W L K Arena (Number) W L K NIANIA(2) 1 0 0 CALEAM(26) 1 1 0 FRATSFA(52) 0 2 0 JHELUM(4) 2 8 1 MORYA(28) 3 0 0 TROCAR(54) 0 1 0 KALTOS(5) 2 0 0 CHIMLEVTAL(31) 4 2 0 DELARQ TOR(58) 0 1 0 BONSUR(7) 1 0 0 NIATOLI ISLAND(33) 1 1 0 ILLIS(59) 1 1 0 ARUAK CITY(11) 1 0 0 MURSKA(35) 0 1 0 DRAGONHEAD(72) 1 0 0 RIZTAB(12) 1 2 0 SIBIKHAS(37) 0 1 0 ERINIKA(73) 3 0 0 TOBIR(14) 2 3 0 ZENSU(40) 0 1 0 DWES EG(82) 4 0 0 SUNSET(21) 1 0 0 NORTH FORK(47) 7 6 0 OLD VALAMANTIS(96) 0 1 0 LYRATILAN(25) 0 1 0 SNOWBOUND(50) 0 1 0 TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY MORTICIAN 2-3890 79 20 1 243 DARK TOADS (1185) NIANIA JIMMY CUSTER 4-6268 23 26 2 100 DOGS OF WAR (1227) JHELUM BOARISH YELTSIN 5-3109 66 43 2 332 PARTY ANIMALS (476) KALTOS MAD CAT 7-2965 56 37 6 224 INSP GADGETS MINIONS (214) BONSUR BLUE VELVET 11-6248 30 11 0 196 COLORIFIC (1050) ARUAK CITY ARTEMISIA 12-5096 47 48 0 202 DARKMOON (1169) RIZTAB BALCLUTHA 14-3169 33 42 1 223 OTAGO HIGHLANDERS (808) TOBIR BODDINGTON'S 21-5035 23 12 0 164 REAL BEER (859) SUNSET WHEEL OF FORTUNE 25-2529 50 46 2 207 DUELING FOR DOLLARS (558) LYRATILAN DUTCH TREAT 26-1841 100 36 2 207 WORLDWIDE GORE (35) CALEAM BALDER 28-3778 29 24 3 189 VALHALLA (1102) MORYA SPATHA 31-4996 40 34 2 202 SOL INVICTUS (993) CHIMLEVTAL WRETCHEDMISERY 33-7255 35 23 0 175 CHAOTICDISORDER (1170) NIATOLI ISLAND PAT 35-2292 44 45 2 204 COMMON JOE'S (509) MURSKA WEINERMUN 37-2635 57 53 3 200 ALL THE MUN'S MEN (219) SIBIKHAS PHILLIP THE BIRD 40-3708 17 11 1 187 CRUEL PET NAMES (1117) ZENSU GRINNON BEARIT 47-2955 45 30 4 323 THE BEAR'S PAW (196) NORTH FORK ROXANNE DE'MORRE 50-3449 25 23 0 70 DRUID'S GROVE (1041) SNOWBOUND WHACKING WILLOW 52-3167 42 11 1 201 FLOWER GIRLS (265) FRATSFA XYCO 54-2899 16 11 2 64 JANIX (1223) TROCAR THE WHEAT KING 58-5407 75 58 2 197 AUTUMN LIGHTNING (1172) DELARQ TOR SOUL SCOURGE 59-2589 32 13 0 190 VILE REAVERS (1134) ILLIS CRUMBSNATCHER 72-1842 51 31 1 235 ONE GOOD DUDE (396) DRAGONHEAD FOUNTAIN TROLL 73-643 84 26 2 375 D.A. REJECTS (352) ERINIKA BRAND 82-13289 45 31 1 228 TOADS OF AMBER III (1180) DWES EG RANDOM MATCHUP 96-1048 33 15 4 195 OVERRATED (1044) OLD VALAMANTIS