AD

Date   : 08/14/2007    Duedate: 09/10/2007

CRYSALIS

DM-106    TURN-186

RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %  RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %
  1 TONGUE N CHE 82/1203    6    3  0 66.7    7-PLATOON 31/1222         3    2  0 60.0
  2 REAL BEER 21/859     1858  934 25 66.5    8-EYE OF THE S 54/1164   10    7  0 58.8
    WAY TO GO! II 73/1010                     9-KNIGHT BREED 45/1070  107   96  1 52.7
    D.A. REJECTS 73/352                         DARQUE FORCES 31/908                  
    PARTY ANIMALS 5/476                         DARQUE FORCES 72/1009                 
    WORLDWIDE GORE 26/35                     10 COMMON JOE'S 35/509   481  497  4 49.2
    HERE TO PHOENIX 26/871                      ONE GOOD DUDE 72/396                  
    MILITARY MAYHEM 31/37                       INSP GADGETS MINIONS 7/214            
    ROYAL FLUSH 47/10                           ALL THE MUN'S MEN 37/219              
    OTTO'S PARTS 52/664                         BLACK & BLUE 73/1090                  
    CRUEL PET NAMES 40/1117                     DUELING FOR DOLLARS 25/558            
  3 DARK TOADS 2/1185     217  123  0 63.8      OTAGO HIGHLANDERS 14/808              
    Z GLADIATORZ 8/1128                      11 JANIX 54/1223          91  111  3 45.0
    TOADS OF AMBER III 82/1180                  THE BEAR'S PAW 47/196                 
    DARK TOADS 05D 82/1184                      VALHALLA 28/1102                      
    CAT IN A HAT 33/1159                        PLAYPEN 14/1146                       
    CRAZY CREEPS 60/363                      12-INDIFFERENCE 47/1221    8   10  0 44.4
    SMITHSONIAN 8/250                        13 DARKMOON 12/1169       44   58  1 43.1
    GOLDEN GLADIATORS 16/577                    VILE REAVERS 59/1134                  
    FLOWER GIRLS 52/265                         SOL INVICTUS 31/993                   
    COLORIFIC 11/1050                           CHAOTICDISORDER 33/1170               
    PAPER MARIO 5/1224                          AUTUMN LIGHTNING 58/1172              
    MAGIC ARTISTS 78/1218                    14 DOGS OF WAR 4/1227    375  647  4 36.7
  4-NATURAL B. K 47/1148   13    8  1 61.9      NORTHERN LIGHTS 45/1042               
  5 OVERRATED 96/1044      81   53  1 60.4      MIDDLE WAY 6 50/1114                  
    MYSTIC ORC FEAST 47/704                  15-X-POSSE 72/1093        25   47  2 34.7
    UNFIT TO BE ORCS 31/881                  16 DRUID'S GROV 50/1041    7   15  1 31.8
    WASTED SCUM 47/1112                      17 FILIPINA LAD 28/1147    5   18  0 21.7
  6 THE OPERA 47/1207      15   10  0 60.0   18-THE SHALLOWSH 4/1206    2    9  0 18.2
    SUPERIOR FORCES ZC 71/1109               19-ALL NIGHT LO 31/1220    1    0  0  100

    '##/###' Avoid teams by their Team Id     '-'  Team did not fight this turn

                                 THE GUARDIAN'S FORUM
                         Reflections by the Chief Tower Guard

What to say, what to say, what to say....  In a nutshell it boils down to
incompetence.  That's right, Slugbait stunk it up again.  Despite scheming,
wheezling, a bribe here or there and to be honest just plain benign neglect the
Slugbait syndicate ended up with not one but two Duelmastership.  As you all well
know there is nothing that my little sniveling boss hates more than the
"responsibilities," the "political points" and frankly being forced out into the
light of day by having one of his precious warriors winning the title.  Much less
two. I think the direct quote was "What the bleep were you doing!  Scared to take a
punch or two and lay down?"

Oh well, it is what is.  Maybe I complete this rambling diatribe with a the history
of little old me: Random Matchup.  I'm not one of you pretty boys that joined the
gladiatorial ranks for "glory," "fame" or even money.  No, I was a bread baker who
happened to get a little sossed one night and next thing I know I'm in plate armor
with a shortsword in my hand.  Shanghaied.  All the warriors in the face-to-face
bloodgames are supposed to be convicts but maybe not all the managers out there
follow the rules to the letter of the law.

I learned real quick that the only way out of the bloodgames was to win.  So, I
finished of my first two opponents real quick. Bam, 2-0-2.  Then I fight three
matches against this Aimed Blow named Corran.  You know the type: a moronic midget,
head to toe plate and more con than common sense.  Despite that he is a little
monster 4-0-4 but after three fights in a row I'm 6-3-2 and he is 6-3-4.  Slugbait
points me at some stiff named EZ and it sure was "easy" to get to 6-3-3.  My last
fight was a win against Manalger, another AB.  I win and end up 7-3-3 and I'm sure
that I'm going to visit the DA.  But, no, the guys ahead of my shank it and end up
getting killed.  Incompetence, story of my life.  I'm of to the Isle where I've done
better than expected with one TV and a couple of close 10th round losses.

Hopefully someone will step up and grab the crown.  Good luck.

                             REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER

     Yes, well, if you're going to actually READ this stuff, I suppose I should give
it a little thought.  Early in the morning for thought.  Almost any time is too early
in the morning for thought.  Although not to early for fights, and we had thirty-six
of them.  Not bad.  In fact, darned good.  No arena on the Isle except Talahya and
Primus can match us in fights, and they don't count.  And NO other arena on the Isle
can match us in sociability.  This is what comes of moving at a slower pace and
taking the time to do things right.  Of course, with the longest fights taking a mere
six minutes (two were tied for that), I have to wonder whether some significant part
of "moving at a slower pace" has perhaps slipped your minds?  In the past we've had
fights that have taken HOURS, days, even occasionally WEEKS to reach a conclusion,
and now... six minutes?  Pfui.  Still, we take what we can get, and they tell me that
the very long fights resulted in the death of whole groves of trees.

     The holder of our title, of the Crysaline helm, received the most challenges
today, NINE.  This is very, very good.  This is a clear sign that people care.  Or
possibly that they don't like Random Matchup sitting at the top of the pyramind.
     Mystic Orc Feast was most avoided, due probably to some dark rumors about just
what Mystic Orcs eat when they get together.  It is NOT true that Mystic Orcs eat
their table mates when they feast.  Fact, people who have gone to dinner with Mystic
Orcs have returned alive.  It's the Existential Orcs you have to worry about.  Most
avoiding the Mystic Orc Feasters this month was Here to Phoenix.  And what do THEY
eat, eh?
     Thirty-six fights, involving a mere TWO standbys, which is very good.  Thirteen
challenges, one of them TV.

     LADY CONSOLACION (28-3703) (23-33-2,54) of FILIPINA LADYZ fought JEZEBEL (4-
4954) (23-19-0,88) of DOGS OF WAR.  LADY CONSOLACION demolished JEZEBEL in an
exciting 1 minute gory uneven competition.  And who is this Jezebel who has just
appeared in our midst?  Obviously Lady Consolacion had some ideas as to, if not who,
what Jezebel was.  Is, I suppose.  Leopards don't change their spots, and neither do
dogs.
     WOZZECK (47-5644) (15-9-1,68) of THE OPERA fought HELENE DE TROI (4-5154) (17-
15-0,66) of DOGS OF WAR.  WOZZECK vanquished HELENE DE TROI in a 1 minute mismatched
bout.  Another inept Dog, not that I would intend in accidental insult to Helene by
that name.  All my insults are deliberate.  I have heard it whispered that the Dogs
of War arrived to fight the Shallowship, and I hope the Shallowship are taking note
of this.
     SUPER CHE (4-5269) (20-20-1,81) of DOGS OF WAR fought SIPPYCUP SAM (14-4280)
(18-17-3,61) of PLAYPEN.  SUPER CHE was handily defeated by SIPPYCUP SAM in a popular
1 minute uneven match.  And if this is a fair measure of the Dogs of War, then we're
looking at a long stretch of peace here.
     BLACK FLAG (82-46046) (21-13-3,63) of TONGUE N CHEEK fought LITTLE DEVIL (14-
4359) (18-17-0,46) of PLAYPEN.  BLACK FLAG viciously subdued LITTLE DEVIL in an
exciting 4 minute brutal fight.  Excellent strategy there, Black Flag!  I have to
admit that I wouldn't have thought of using the flag as a gag on that little devil.

     G.A. CUSTER (4-5376) (20-18-2,80) of DOGS OF WAR fought XYCO (54-2899) (16-10-
2,70) of JANIX.  G.A. CUSTER demolished XYCO in an exciting 1 minute mismatched
match.  Obviously, this is a dog of a different color.  But if Xyco could bring in a
few sues to assist, who knows how the next match might go?
     LYSISTRATA (4-5389) (23-10-1,80) of DOGS OF WAR fought ALASTARIAN DESERTER (106-
1) (0-0-0,30) of the College of Mimes.  LYSISTRATA slaughtered ALASTARIAN DESERTER in
a 1 minute mismatched fight.  And who tossed that poor Mime at a lady with a serious
temper?  Definitely a bad match, and I wonder whether the bookies are sufficiently
annoyed with the standbys to have arranged this example?  There are some curious
stories going around.
     PERICLES (4-5531) (23-24-2,95) of DOGS OF WAR fought LADY DOMINGA (28-3702) (18-
38-0,51) of FILIPINA LADYZ.  PERICLES was overpowered by LADY DOMINGA in a 1 minute
bloody one-sided fray.  Definitely, the Ladyz don't like the Dogs of War.  Male
Chauvinists of the world unite and strike back!
     BLUE BLOOD (73-3657) (17-10-1,92) of BLACK & BLUE fought EPIMONIDAS (4-5683)
(20-20-0,80) of DOGS OF WAR.  BLUE BLOOD overpowered EPIMONIDAS in an exciting 1
minute one-sided fight.  And how, we must wonder, did these dogs even manage to
graduate?  I know Jhelum is a small arena these days, but this crew is ridiculous.
Sink them all, Shallowship!

     MANI (31-5102) (24-26-4,97) of SOL INVICTUS fought SHERMAN (4-5391) (17-12-1,64)
of DOGS OF WAR.  MANI handily defeated SHERMAN in an exciting 1 minute one-sided
fight.  Does it strike you that there are rather a LOT of dogs around today?  Silver
gets you gold that the numbers on the sands will be sharply reduced by next month.
     CUBA (26-3917) (23-9-0,100) of HERE TO PHOENIX fought HORAGALLES (31-5212) (19-
17-2,88) of SOL INVICTUS.  CUBA was overpowered by HORAGALLES in a 1 minute uneven
fight.  So, Cuba, was this as bad as a Mystic Orc Feast?
     LOOGIE CLAP (82-46049) (23-12-2,92) of TONGUE N CHEEK fought BETSY (4-5214) (20-
27-3,90) of DOGS OF WAR.  LOOGIE CLAP handily defeated BETSY in a 2 minute one-sided
duel.  It is to yawn.  Definitely a worthless mutt.
     HUNGRY BONES (31-4720) (21-14-1,148) of UNFIT TO BE ORCS fought JIMMY CUSTER (4-
6268) (23-25-2,96) of DOGS OF WAR.  HUNGRY BONES overpowered JIMMY CUSTER in a 1
minute one-sided fray.  A question:  If Hungry is unfit to be an orc, what is
he/she/it fit for?  What are the criteria of fitness to be orcs?
     DIAMOND (82-33259) (11-2-0,171) of DARK TOADS 05D fought GENERAL PUBLIC (31-
3112) (20-18-1,116) of MILITARY MAYHEM.  DIAMOND vanquished GENERAL PUBLIC in an
action packed 1 minute uneven bout.  Not a good day for the military type of any
persuasion, it seems.

     WRETCHEDMISERY (33-7255) (34-23-0,173) of CHAOTICDISORDER fought ADAM'S APPLE
(52-3203) (23-11-0,111) of OTTO'S PARTS.  WRETCHEDMISERY overpowered ADAM'S APPLE in
a popular 1 minute brutal one-sided duel.  Does this mean that Adam choked,
wretchedly, on the apple?  It WAS his fault, you know.  He could have refused.
     BODDINGTON'S (21-5035) (22-12-0,162) of REAL BEER fought DEMONICHELLION (33-
7038) (29-30-2,101) of CHAOTICDISORDER.  BODDINGTON'S overpowered DEMONICHELLION in
an exciting 1 minute uneven fight.  Ah, so demons can be made drunk and then more
easily dealt with?  I will have to remember that, and so should other people.  A lot
of trouble could be avoided this way.
     BEARNICE (47-2847) (29-37-7,164) of THE BEAR'S PAW fought HARI-KARI (73-3049)
(14-4-0,121) of WAY TO GO! II.  BEARNICE was handily defeated by HARI-KARI in an
exciting 1 minute one-sided contest.  But nobody "went."  Probably just as well,
leave that Alastarian Deserter to pass through the fire of resurrection alone.  He
whines.
     WHEEL OF FORTUNE (25-2529) (50-45-2,210) of DUELING FOR DOLLARS fought DAIRY
QUEEN (47-2685) (75-42-3,203) of ROYAL FLUSH.  WHEEL OF FORTUNE was beaten by DAIRY
QUEEN in an action packed 2 minute fray.  Ah, one forgets that sometimes fortune does
NOT favor... even itself.
     DUTCH TREAT (26-1841) (99-36-2,201) of WORLDWIDE GORE fought RIRORNI CAPTAIN
(106-26) (0-0-0,200) of the College of Mimes.  DUTCH TREAT won victory over RIRORNI
CAPTAIN in a 2 minute match.  Now the Captain will have to pay for everything.
Serves him right.

     NEWT GINGRICH (5-3399) (83-28-0,202) of PARTY ANIMALS fought WEINERMUN (37-2635)
(57-52-3,194) of ALL THE MUN'S MEN.  NEWT GINGRICH devastated WEINERMUN in a 1 minute
one-sided bout.  Ah, but I fear the setting for this devastation began when Newt
walked out carrying a long bun and squirt-bottle full of mustard.  Though he spared
us all the pickle relish, for which I am thankful.
     PAT (35-2292) (44-44-2,215) of COMMON JOE'S fought JACK VALTRAEDS (47-407) (106-
68-2,193) of ROYAL FLUSH.  PAT was narrowly defeated by JACK VALTRAEDS in a crowd
pleasing 4 minute bloody fight.  Having lasted so well, Pat has proved himself an UN-
common joe.
     MORTICIAN (2-3890) (78-20-1,234) of DARK TOADS fought KING FORADAY (47-3762)
(56-48-4,188) of ROYAL FLUSH.  MORTICIAN savagely defeated KING FORADAY in an
exciting 3 minute brutal match.  This Mortician is a failure as an intimidator.  If
he was TRULY intent on filling up his cemetary, he would be out there killing people
right and left.  But do we see a large tally of deaths on his record?  Not so.  If he
is spreading death, it is among the non-gladiatorial population, and who cares about
them, eh?
     WHACKING WILLOW (52-3167) (42-10-1,261) of FLOWER GIRLS fought MAD CAT (7-2965)
(55-37-6,200) of INSP GADGETS MINIONS.  WHACKING WILLOW was viciously subdued by MAD
CAT in a crowd pleasing 4 minute brawl.  A well-matched pair, when you come down to
it.  But I hadn't realized we had so many voyeurs in the crowd.
     BEAR ACUDA (47-4995) (31-21-1,232) of THE BEAR'S PAW fought FOUNTAIN TROLL (73-
643) (83-26-2,359) of D.A. REJECTS.  BEAR ACUDA was devastated by FOUNTAIN TROLL in a
2 minute brutal uneven duel.  Though you may not realize it, this Fountain Troll IS
one of the "dangerous monsters of the bathtub."  But he never fights dirty.

     And now, the challenge matches:
     FRED BEAR (47-5348) (20-11-0,87) of THE BEAR'S PAW challenged ROXANNE DE'MORRE
(50-3449) (25-22-0,65) of DRUID'S GROVE.  Down 22.  FRED BEAR viciously subdued
ROXANNE DE'MORRE in a 5 minute Challenge fight.  Easy to see why:  The Bear thought
she was a honey tree and ripped her apart with his claws.  It's what bears do.
     MOSGIEL (14-3836) (26-13-1,102) of OTAGO HIGHLANDERS challenged URG GUTSPILLER
(59-2561) (24-14-1,108) of VILE REAVERS.  Up 6.  MOSGIEL was devastated by URG
GUTSPILLER in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge bout.  Yes, fine, Urg won.  But WHO is
going to clean up all those spilled guts?  The janitors have lodged a protest.
     UNCERTAIN OMELET (47-3786) (21-9-0,188) of MYSTIC ORC FEAST challenged SPATHA
(31-4996) (39-34-2,187) of SOL INVICTUS.  Down 1.  UNCERTAIN OMELET was viciously
subdued by SPATHA in a 2 minute Challenge contest.  Sliced and diced to a fare-thee-
well.  I've never seen sliced scrambled eggs before.  I'm not sure I want to see them
again, either.  All that, er, catsup.
     FIGHTER ACE (47-1189) (68-47-6,194) of ROYAL FLUSH challenged SOUL SCOURGE (59-
2589) (32-12-0,194) of VILE REAVERS.  Straight across.  FIGHTER ACE demolished SOUL
SCOURGE in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match.  An ace is, after all, an ace when
you come down to it.
     AGLIBOL (12-5848) (38-33-1,184) of DARKMOON challenged BLUE VELVET (11-6248)
(29-11-0,185) of COLORIFIC.  Up 1.  AGLIBOL was savagely defeated by BLUE VELVET in a
popular 6 minute Challenge melee.  One of our two longest fights, and a bit of a
puzzle.  I couldn't see what exactly Blue Velvet was up to, what with the moon going
dark over us at that instant.  I'm sure we missed something good.
     ARTEMISIA (12-5096) (46-48-0,189) of DARKMOON challenged PHILLIP THE BIRD (40-
3708) (17-10-1,190) of CRUEL PET NAMES.  Up 1.  ARTEMISIA won victory over PHILLIP
THE BIRD in a popular 4 minute gory Challenge duel.  Poor Phillip had to walk the
plank.  Good thing there was only sand underneath.  I don't believe he's a swimming
bird.

     DUNEDIN (14-3703) (31-48-0,181) of OTAGO HIGHLANDERS challenged BALDER (28-3778)
(28-24-3,181) of VALHALLA.  Straight across.  DUNEDIN lost to BALDER in an action
packed 4 minute gory Challenge duel.  Ah... bit of embarrassment there for Dunedin,
but we may hope he learned well from it.  At the least, not to challenge Balder again
soon.
     DISCO QUEEN (47-1992) (44-24-1,190) of ROYAL FLUSH challenged BRIARTHORN (12-
5671) (42-37-2,200) of DARKMOON.  Up 10.  DISCO QUEEN slimly won victory over
BRIARTHORN in a 6 minute Challenge fight.  And what other kind of victory could it
be, since Disco Queen is deliciously slim?  Although six minutes of those dazzling
lights flashing on and off and back and forth... headache city.
     STIGMA OF STUPID (31-4948) (34-16-1,203) of UNFIT TO BE ORCS challenged
BALCLUTHA (14-3169) (32-42-1,203) of OTAGO HIGHLANDERS.  Straight across.  We're
seeing a lot of that today.  Which is fine, just an observation.  STIGMA OF STUPID
was overpowered by BALCLUTHA in a 1 minute Challenge struggle.  So, you see how
Stigma got that name.
     BOARISH YELTSIN (5-3109) (65-43-2,310) of PARTY ANIMALS challenged THE WHEAT
KING (58-5407) (75-57-2,257) of AUTUMN LIGHTNING.  Down 53.  BOARISH YELTSIN
overpowered THE WHEAT KING in a 2 minute mismatched Challenge match.  Does this mean
that Boarish is anti-wheat?  A strict carnivore, perhaps?
     KING UVDAHELL (47-1643) (50-25-1,233) of ROYAL FLUSH challenged GRINNON BEARIT
(47-2955) (44-30-4,302) of THE BEAR'S PAW.  Up 69.  KING UVDAHELL was subdued by
GRINNON BEARIT in an exciting 2 minute Challenge melee.  And Grinnon maintained that
maddening, ah, expression the whole time.  Probably why it was only a two-minute
fight.  If you're not careful, you know, your face freezes that way.

     Our tourney victor, TOADKILLER DOG (47-1103) (34-15-1,206) of WASTED SCUM TV
challenged BRAND (82-13289) (44-31-1,210) of TOADS OF AMBER III.  Up 4.  TOADKILLER
DOG was viciously subdued by BRAND in a 2 minute Challenge fight.  There was a
certain attractive symmetry about the Toadkiller challenging a Toad, but it was not
to be.  At least, not today.

     And for the title, one of nine challengers, CRUMBSNATCHER (72-1842) (50-31-
1,214) of ONE GOOD DUDE challenged RANDOM MATCHUP (96-1048) (33-14-4,271) of
OVERRATED.  Up 57, if I mistake not the math.  CRUMBSNATCHER overpowered RANDOM
MATCHUP in a 1 minute Challenge Title duel.  And this is no crumb that has been
snatched from the jaws of Random Matchup!  A salute to Crumbsnatcher!

                                     Ketchum

THE TOWER GUARDIAN            W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 CRUMBSNATCHER 72-1842       51  31  1  235  ONE GOOD DUDE (396)        DRAGONHEAD

GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS    W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 FOUNTAIN TROLL 73-643       84  26  2  375  D.A. REJECTS (352)         ERINIKA
 BOARISH YELTSIN 5-3109      66  43  2  332  PARTY ANIMALS (476)        KALTOS
 GRINNON BEARIT 47-2955      45  30  4  323  THE BEAR'S PAW (196)       NORTH FORK
 MORTICIAN 2-3890            79  20  1  243  DARK TOADS (1185)          NIANIA
 BRAND 82-13289              45  31  1  228  TOADS OF AMBER III (1180)  DWES EG
-RAVISHING REDBUD 52-3197    35  12  0  227  FLOWER GIRLS (265)         FRATSFA
 MAD CAT 7-2965              56  37  6  224  INSP GADGETS MINIONS (214) BONSUR
 BALCLUTHA 14-3169           33  42  1  223  OTAGO HIGHLANDERS (808)    TOBIR
 FIGHTER ACE 47-1189         69  47  6  215  ROYAL FLUSH (10)           NORTH FORK
 NEWT GINGRICH 5-3399        84  28  0  213  PARTY ANIMALS (476)        KALTOS
 DAIRY QUEEN 47-2685         76  42  3  212  ROYAL FLUSH (10)           NORTH FORK

GRAND CHAMPIONS               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 DUTCH TREAT 26-1841        100  36  2  207  WORLDWIDE GORE (35)        CALEAM
 WHEEL OF FORTUNE 25-2529    50  46  2  207  DUELING FOR DOLLARS (558)  LYRATILAN
 DISCO QUEEN 47-1992         45  24  1  206  ROYAL FLUSH (10)           NORTH FORK
 BEAR ACUDA 47-4995          31  22  1  206  THE BEAR'S PAW (196)       NORTH FORK
-EVE 72-4596                 26  13  0  206  DARQUE FORCES (1009)       DRAGONHEAD
 JACK VALTRAEDS 47-407      107  68  2  205  ROYAL FLUSH (10)           NORTH FORK
 PAT 35-2292                 44  45  2  204  COMMON JOE'S (509)         MURSKA
-SODOM 31-4368               33  20  1  204  DARQUE FORCES (908)        CHIMLEVTAL
 KING FORADAY 47-3762        56  49  4  202  ROYAL FLUSH (10)           NORTH FORK
 ARTEMISIA 12-5096           47  48  0  202  DARKMOON (1169)            RIZTAB
 SPATHA 31-4996              40  34  2  202  SOL INVICTUS (993)         CHIMLEVTAL
 WHACKING WILLOW 52-3167     42  11  1  201  FLOWER GIRLS (265)         FRATSFA
 WEINERMUN 37-2635           57  53  3  200  ALL THE MUN'S MEN (219)    SIBIKHAS

GRAND CHAMPIONS               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 KING UVDAHELL 47-1643       50  26  1  200  ROYAL FLUSH (10)           NORTH FORK
 TOADKILLER DOG 47-1103      34  16  1  200  WASTED SCUM (1112)         NORTH FORK
 BRIARTHORN 12-5671          42  38  2  198  DARKMOON (1169)            RIZTAB
-CANNONBALL 72-5313          25  29  1  198  X-POSSE (1093)             DRAGONHEAD
 THE WHEAT KING 58-5407      75  58  2  197  AUTUMN LIGHTNING (1172)    DELARQ TOR
 BLUE VELVET 11-6248         30  11  0  196  COLORIFIC (1050)           ARUAK CITY
 RANDOM MATCHUP 96-1048      33  15  4  195  OVERRATED (1044)           OLD VALAMANTIS
 STIGMA OF STUPID 31-4948    34  17  1  191  UNFIT TO BE ORCS (881)     CHIMLEVTAL
 SOUL SCOURGE 59-2589        32  13  0  190  VILE REAVERS (1134)        ILLIS
 BALDER 28-3778              29  24  3  189  VALHALLA (1102)            MORYA
 AGLIBOL 12-5848             38  34  1  187  DARKMOON (1169)            RIZTAB
 UNCERTAIN OMELET 47-3786    21  10  0  187  MYSTIC ORC FEAST (704)     NORTH FORK
 PHILLIP THE BIRD 40-3708    17  11  1  187  CRUEL PET NAMES (1117)     ZENSU
-FIVE GOLDEN RINGS 16-4331   37   7  0  184  GOLDEN GLADIATORS (577)    WILLAF

GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS       W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 DUNEDIN 14-3703             31  49  0  180  OTAGO HIGHLANDERS (808)    TOBIR
 WRETCHEDMISERY 33-7255      35  23  0  175  CHAOTICDISORDER (1170)     NIATOLI ISLAND
 DIAMOND 82--32277           12   2  0  173  DARK TOADS 05D (1184)      DWES EG
-SNOWFALL 45-3473            46  35  1  165  NORTHERN LIGHTS (1042)     STORMCROWE
 BODDINGTON'S 21-5035        23  12  0  164  REAL BEER (859)            SUNSET
-SCORPIUS 45-3752            34  17  0  157  KNIGHT BREED (1070)        STORMCROWE
 HARI-KARI 73-3049           15   4  0  154  WAY TO GO! II (1010)       ERINIKA

GRAND ADEPTS                  W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 HUNGRY BONES 31-4720        22  14  1  150  UNFIT TO BE ORCS (881)     CHIMLEVTAL
-GILIA HARN 50-3391          34  38  0  143  MIDDLE WAY 6 (1114)        SNOWBOUND
-ZIT 8-4385                  24   3  0  141  Z GLADIATORZ (1128)        ARKERS
 BEARNICE 47-2847            29  38  7  135  THE BEAR'S PAW (196)       NORTH FORK
-SHARD 45-3507               28  43  1  130  NORTHERN LIGHTS (1042)     STORMCROWE
-TINY TIM 60-6042            24   7  1  128  CRAZY CREEPS (363)         ARADI
 URG GUTSPILLER 59-2561      25  14  1  124  VILE REAVERS (1134)        ILLIS
 GENERAL PUBLIC 31-3112      20  19  1  123  MILITARY MAYHEM (37)       CHIMLEVTAL
-HOLLAN INNIS 50-3388        32  33  0  122  MIDDLE WAY 6 (1114)        SNOWBOUND
 ADAM'S APPLE 52-3203        23  12  0  120  OTTO'S PARTS (664)         FRATSFA
-LIONESS 33-7222             20   4  0  120  CAT IN A HAT (1159)        NIATOLI ISLAND
-ELLITA FESS 50-3392         36  35  1  119  MIDDLE WAY 6 (1114)        SNOWBOUND
-TOM SAWYER 8-4281           22   9  0  119  SMITHSONIAN (250)          ARKERS
-ARAGANT 4-6220              33  21  0  118  THE SHALLOWSHIP (1206)     JHELUM
 DEMONICHELLION 33-7038      29  31  2  109  CHAOTICDISORDER (1170)     NIATOLI ISLAND
 MANI 31-5102                25  26  4  103  SOL INVICTUS (993)         CHIMLEVTAL
 LOOGIE CLAP 82--19487       24  12  2  102  TONGUE N CHEEK (1203)      DWES EG

GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES    W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
-WHITE SETTLER 47-5322       25  14  2  100  NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 (1148 NORTH FORK
 JIMMY CUSTER 4-6268         23  26  2  100  DOGS OF WAR (1227)         JHELUM
 HORAGALLES 31-5212          20  17  2  100  SOL INVICTUS (993)         CHIMLEVTAL
 BLUE BLOOD 73-3657          18  10  1  100  BLACK & BLUE (1090)        ERINIKA
-LADY HUNTSMAN 30-4579       29  12  0   99  LENPROS (189)              IAYE
-WIMPERETTA 54-2655          27  17  1   99  TRADERS OF TROCAR (1027)   TROCAR
 MOSGIEL 14-3836             26  14  1   97  OTAGO HIGHLANDERS (808)    TOBIR
-GIMLET 4-6218               24  32  2   92  THE SHALLOWSHIP (1206)     JHELUM
 FRED BEAR 47-5348           21  11  0   91  THE BEAR'S PAW (196)       NORTH FORK

GRAND INITIATES               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
-AMYTHEST 16-3446            18  33  0   87  MAXIMUM RESULTS (420)      WILLAF
 CUBA 26-3917                23  10  0   85  HERE TO PHOENIX (871)      CALEAM
 LADY CONSOLACION 28-3703    24  33  2   84  FILIPINA LADYZ (1147)      MORYA
 LADY DOMINGA 28-3702        19  38  0   83  FILIPINA LADYZ (1147)      MORYA
 SIPPYCUP SAM 14-4280        19  17  3   82  PLAYPEN (1146)             TOBIR
 WOZZECK 47-5644             16   9  1   79  THE OPERA (1207)           NORTH FORK
-FROSTFLARE 45-4112          21  18  1   76  NORTHERN LIGHTS (1042)     STORMCROWE
-SUNFLASH 45-3474            32  49  1   71  NORTHERN LIGHTS (1042)     STORMCROWE

GRAND INITIATES               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 ROXANNE DE'MORRE 50-3449    25  23  0   70  DRUID'S GROVE (1041)       SNOWBOUND
 BLACK FLAG 82--19490        22  13  3   68  TONGUE N CHEEK (1203)      DWES EG
-LADY MACBETH 8-4627         20   6  0   66  SMITHSONIAN (250)          ARKERS
-LEGALASS 4-6217             26  30  1   65  THE SHALLOWSHIP (1206)     JHELUM
-TWINK 5-4396                18   9  2   65  PAPER MARIO (1224)         KALTOS
 XYCO 54-2899                16  11  2   64  JANIX (1223)               TROCAR
-WASTELANDER 54-2134         20  16  1   63  EYE OF THE STORM (1164)    TROCAR
-<ERASER> 71-5644            18   9  0   63  SUPERIOR FORCES ZC (1109)  KYR'TERR
-SCANDALF 4-6219             26  31  0   62  THE SHALLOWSHIP (1206)     JHELUM
-POSEIDONIS 31-5540          15   8  1   54  AVENGERS (259)             CHIMLEVTAL
-MORWHEN 47-5686             15   6  2   53  LOST SOULS (1225)          NORTH FORK
 LITTLE DEVIL 14-4359        18  18  0   50  PLAYPEN (1146)             TOBIR
-FENDER GRALE 50-3389        22  44  2   44  MIDDLE WAY 6 (1114)        SNOWBOUND

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                    W   L  K TEAM NAME              SLAIN BY              TURN
ALASTARIAN DESERTER 106-1   0   1  0   1                    LYSISTRATA 4-5389      186

                               PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE

Crip -- Sure, sure.  Running away from us are you? -- The Consortium Folk

     But you might be contagious!

Crumbsnatcher -- I am feeling blue and not velvet plus both crummy and snatched. --
Blue Velvet

"SODOM was bested by RAVISHING REDBUD in a popular 5 minute Challenge contest.  Both
parties came out of the arena with goofy grins on their faces.  Make of it what you
will."  Our spymaster is sooooo funny, is it not? -- The Flower Girls and their camp
followers

     You mean... someone actually READS that stuff?

Urg Gutspiller -- Gee, I really had a great time with you.  Thanks for letting me
call on you.  Did you like my paintbrush? -- Tom Sawyer

     Why has he got vertical white stripes?

Hollan Innis -- Ringing?  Ringing?  Hmmmmm.  Perhaps my ukulele was out of tune?  But
it surely was effective, wasn't it?  (wink) -- Tiny Tim

Briarthorn -- You avoided the casket.  Lucky you. -- Mortician

     You weren't going to offer your BEST one?

Good luck to all Crysalisers at The Atlanta Face.  Bring home some glory to our fine
arena.  A salute to all here. -- The Consortium Elders

     Or should that be Crysalizers?

Crip -- Thanks for the welcome.  As for Tongue N Cheek being Max's, I am sure he is
glad it isn't.  I was never quite able to make it as successful a team as I wanted.
I don't recall our teams meeting much in North Fork but I do have a couple old fights
vs Perfect Ten.  Maybe I kept them 'cause my guys won both of them.  Look forward to
more meetings here. -- Wretch

Master Darque -- Thanks for the welcome.  Can't wait to see how my guys do against
yours at a higher level of DM. -- Wretch

All -- Thanks for the welcome.  Sorry I have been slow to reply; my head has been in
the clouds for the last month or so.  Should be more hands on now. -- Wretch

Random Matchup -- You are quite the Tower Guardian.  But how is it that you made it
out of blood games and I was only in the regular arena and I have more kills then
you? -- Mad Cat

     Natural talent.

Blue Velvet -- I hope that none of the Crumbs that took got stuck in your nice soft
velvet. -- Crumbsnatcher

Eve -- Man, does my head hurt.  I might have a concussion. -- Dunedin

Crip -- If I am lucky and I can get just a couple of trains.  Before I go off to
primus I should have 3 more ratings just like the one you saw. -- Balclutha

Bearnice -- But you never are.  Still, the good news is, I get to retire!  In fact, I
should be retired by the time you read this. -- Gilia Harn

Tiny Tim -- Sorry, but I never did care for tulips. -- Hollan Innis
P.S.  Or ukeleles.
P.P.S.  The beard is really freaky.

     No, it'd be a fine beard if he combed it.  Or maybe braided it.

Mani -- Odd, the weather we've been having, I expected you to triumph in a sweaty
slide. -- Ellita Fess
P.S.  Not that I'm complaining!  A win on the way out the door has great appeal.

Soul Scourge -- Okay, that was moderately vile, and in the middle of a heat wave,
too!  Injury to insult. -- Snowfall

Cheating Manager?  Oh, YEAH, take him DOWN. -- Shard

Demonichellion -- I don't have the energy for this today. -- Sunflash

Sippycup Sam -- Better get rid of that milk if you want to win fights. -- Frostflare

Horagalles -- Either this is the hour of gall, or gaul, as the case might be, or I
have a phobia against suspenders.  Either way, I am retiring and don't actually care
lots. -- Fender Grale
P.S.  But I'm sure that was well done of you.

Fare well to all you gladiators of Crysalis.  The Middle Way and Northern Lights are
going into eclipse and the Dogs of War (from Jhelum) are taking their places.  By
special request! -- Jorja

Just as a question, is the Consortium trying to trigger the return of the Regional
Arena News by miscalling regional allegiences (Arvat as Delarquan and Arkers as Free
Blades), do you think?  It might be too subtle to get the message across. -- Jorja,
mildly curious
P.S.  Does this signify the break-up of the Andorian League?  Is all Alastari falling
into an Age of Chaos?

     Probably an insidious plot of some kind.

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

TOADKILLER DOG was viciously subdued by BRAND in a 2 minute Challenge fight.
KING UVDAHELL was subdued by GRINNON BEARIT in a exciting 2 minute Challenge melee.
CRUMBSNATCHER overpowered RANDOM MATCHUP in a 1 minute Challenge Title duel.
BOARISH YELTSIN overpowered THE WHEAT KING in a 2 minute mismatched Challenge match.
STIGMA OF STUPID was overpowered by BALCLUTHA in a 1 minute Challenge struggle.
DISCO QUEEN slimly won victory over BRIARTHORN in a 6 minute Challenge fight.
DUNEDIN lost to BALDER in a action packed 4 minute gory Challenge duel.
ARTEMISIA won victory over PHILLIP THE BIRD in a popular 4 minute gory Challenge duel.
AGLIBOL was savagely defeated by BLUE VELVET in a popular 6 minute Challenge melee.
FIGHTER ACE demolished SOUL SCOURGE in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match.
UNCERTAIN OMELET was viciously subdued by SPATHA in a 2 minute Challenge contest.
MOSGIEL was devastated by URG GUTSPILLER in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge bout.
FRED BEAR viciously subdued ROXANNE DE'MORRE in a 5 minute Challenge fight.
BEAR ACUDA was devastated by FOUNTAIN TROLL in a 2 minute brutal uneven duel.
WHACKING WILLOW was viciously subdued by MAD CAT in a crowd pleasing 4 minute brawl.
MORTICIAN savagely defeated KING FORADAY in a exciting 3 minute brutal match.
PAT was narrowly defeated by JACK VALTRAEDS in a crowd pleasing 4 minute bloody fight.
NEWT GINGRICH devastated WEINERMUN in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
DUTCH TREAT won victory over RIRORNI CAPTAIN in a 2 minute match.
WHEEL OF FORTUNE was beaten by DAIRY QUEEN in a action packed 2 minute fray.
BEARNICE was handily defeated by HARI-KARI in a exciting 1 minute one-sided contest.
BODDINGTON'S overpowered DEMONICHELLION in a exciting 1 minute uneven fight.
WRETCHEDMISERY overpowered ADAM'S APPLE in a popular 1 minute brutal one-sided duel.
DIAMOND vanquished GENERAL PUBLIC in a action packed 1 minute uneven bout.
HUNGRY BONES overpowered JIMMY CUSTER in a 1 minute one-sided fray.
LOOGIE CLAP handily defeated BETSY in a 2 minute one-sided duel.
CUBA was overpowered by HORAGALLES in a 1 minute uneven fight.
MANI handily defeated SHERMAN in a exciting 1 minute one-sided fight.
BLUE BLOOD overpowered EPIMONIDAS in a exciting 1 minute one-sided fight.
PERICLES was overpowered by LADY DOMINGA in a 1 minute bloody one-sided fray.
LYSISTRATA slaughtered ALASTARIAN DESERTER in a 1 minute mismatched fight.
G.A. CUSTER demolished XYCO in a exciting 1 minute mismatched match.
BLACK FLAG viciously subdued LITTLE DEVIL in a exciting 4 minute brutal fight.
SUPER CHE was handily defeated by SIPPYCUP SAM in a popular 1 minute uneven match.
WOZZECK vanquished HELENE DE TROI in a 1 minute mismatched bout.
LADY CONSOLACION demolished JEZEBEL in a exciting 1 minute gory uneven competition.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                  16         TOTAL PARRY       79 -  42 -  0      65  |
|WALL OF STEEL                   13         STRIKING ATTACK   33 -  21 -  1      61  |
|TOTAL PARRY                     10         LUNGING ATTACK    87 -  73 -  1      54  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  7         SLASHING ATTACK   42 -  36 -  1      54  |
|AIMED BLOW                       7         WALL OF STEEL     42 -  44 -  2      49  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   5         AIMED BLOW        33 -  35 -  0      49  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  4         PARRY-RIPOSTE     23 -  31 -  2      43  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    3         BASHING ATTACK    19 -  37 -  0      34  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      3         PARRY-STRIKE       4 -   8 -  0      33  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     2         PARRY-LUNGE       15 -  30 -  1      33  |

Turn 186 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

STRIKING ATTACK    3 -  1     WALL OF STEEL      6 -  7         4  LUNGING ATTACK 
BASHING ATTACK     3 -  2     AIMED BLOW         3 -  4         3  TOTAL PARRY    
TOTAL PARRY        6 -  4     PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -  2         2  SLASHING ATTACK
SLASHING ATTACK    4 -  3     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  3         1  WALL OF STEEL  
LUNGING ATTACK     9 -  7                                       1  BASHING ATTACK 
PARRY-STRIKE       1 -  1     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
WALL OF STEEL    CRUMBSNATCHER 72-1842      51  31  1  235 ONE GOOD DUDE (396)

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
TOTAL PARRY      FOUNTAIN TROLL 73-643      84  26  2  375 D.A. REJECTS (352)
SLASHING ATTACK  BOARISH YELTSIN 5-3109     66  43  2  332 PARTY ANIMALS (476)
LUNGING ATTACK   GRINNON BEARIT 47-2955     45  30  4  323 THE BEAR'S PAW (196)
BASHING ATTACK   MAD CAT 7-2965             56  37  6  224 INSP GADGETS MINIONS (214)
PARRY-STRIKE     DISCO QUEEN 47-1992        45  24  1  206 ROYAL FLUSH (10)
PARRY-LUNGE      BEAR ACUDA 47-4995         31  22  1  206 THE BEAR'S PAW (196)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    JACK VALTRAEDS 47-407     107  68  2  205 ROYAL FLUSH (10)
STRIKING ATTACK  STIGMA OF STUPID 31-4948   34  17  1  191 UNFIT TO BE ORCS (881)
AIMED BLOW       AGLIBOL 12-5848            38  34  1  187 DARKMOON (1169)

The overall popularity leader is JACK VALTRAEDS 47-407.  The most popular warrior 
this turn was MAD CAT 7-2965.  The ten other most popular fighters were BLUE VELVET 
11-6248, PHILLIP THE BIRD 40-3708, DUNEDIN 14-3703, BRAND 82-13289, DISCO QUEEN 
47-1992, BALDER 28-3778, AGLIBOL 12-5848, BLACK FLAG 82--19490, BOARISH YELTSIN 
5-3109, and LITTLE DEVIL 14-4359.

The least popular fighter this week was HELENE DE TROI 4-5154.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were SUPER CHE 4-5269, PERICLES 4-5531, SHERMAN 4-5391, CUBA 
26-3917, JIMMY CUSTER 4-6268, WEINERMUN 37-2635, MOSGIEL 14-3836, SOUL SCOURGE 
59-2589, XYCO 54-2899, and EPIMONIDAS 4-5683.

Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  
NIANIA(2)            1  0 0  CALEAM(26)           1  1 0  FRATSFA(52)          0  2 0  
JHELUM(4)            2  8 1  MORYA(28)            3  0 0  TROCAR(54)           0  1 0  
KALTOS(5)            2  0 0  CHIMLEVTAL(31)       4  2 0  DELARQ TOR(58)       0  1 0  
BONSUR(7)            1  0 0  NIATOLI ISLAND(33)   1  1 0  ILLIS(59)            1  1 0  
ARUAK CITY(11)       1  0 0  MURSKA(35)           0  1 0  DRAGONHEAD(72)       1  0 0  
RIZTAB(12)           1  2 0  SIBIKHAS(37)         0  1 0  ERINIKA(73)          3  0 0  
TOBIR(14)            2  3 0  ZENSU(40)            0  1 0  DWES EG(82)          4  0 0  
SUNSET(21)           1  0 0  NORTH FORK(47)       7  6 0  OLD VALAMANTIS(96)   0  1 0  
LYRATILAN(25)        0  1 0  SNOWBOUND(50)        0  1 0  

TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 MORTICIAN 2-3890            79  20  1  243  DARK TOADS (1185)          NIANIA
 JIMMY CUSTER 4-6268         23  26  2  100  DOGS OF WAR (1227)         JHELUM
 BOARISH YELTSIN 5-3109      66  43  2  332  PARTY ANIMALS (476)        KALTOS
 MAD CAT 7-2965              56  37  6  224  INSP GADGETS MINIONS (214) BONSUR
 BLUE VELVET 11-6248         30  11  0  196  COLORIFIC (1050)           ARUAK CITY
 ARTEMISIA 12-5096           47  48  0  202  DARKMOON (1169)            RIZTAB
 BALCLUTHA 14-3169           33  42  1  223  OTAGO HIGHLANDERS (808)    TOBIR
 BODDINGTON'S 21-5035        23  12  0  164  REAL BEER (859)            SUNSET
 WHEEL OF FORTUNE 25-2529    50  46  2  207  DUELING FOR DOLLARS (558)  LYRATILAN
 DUTCH TREAT 26-1841        100  36  2  207  WORLDWIDE GORE (35)        CALEAM
 BALDER 28-3778              29  24  3  189  VALHALLA (1102)            MORYA
 SPATHA 31-4996              40  34  2  202  SOL INVICTUS (993)         CHIMLEVTAL
 WRETCHEDMISERY 33-7255      35  23  0  175  CHAOTICDISORDER (1170)     NIATOLI ISLAND
 PAT 35-2292                 44  45  2  204  COMMON JOE'S (509)         MURSKA
 WEINERMUN 37-2635           57  53  3  200  ALL THE MUN'S MEN (219)    SIBIKHAS
 PHILLIP THE BIRD 40-3708    17  11  1  187  CRUEL PET NAMES (1117)     ZENSU
 GRINNON BEARIT 47-2955      45  30  4  323  THE BEAR'S PAW (196)       NORTH FORK
 ROXANNE DE'MORRE 50-3449    25  23  0   70  DRUID'S GROVE (1041)       SNOWBOUND
 WHACKING WILLOW 52-3167     42  11  1  201  FLOWER GIRLS (265)         FRATSFA
 XYCO 54-2899                16  11  2   64  JANIX (1223)               TROCAR
 THE WHEAT KING 58-5407      75  58  2  197  AUTUMN LIGHTNING (1172)    DELARQ TOR
 SOUL SCOURGE 59-2589        32  13  0  190  VILE REAVERS (1134)        ILLIS
 CRUMBSNATCHER 72-1842       51  31  1  235  ONE GOOD DUDE (396)        DRAGONHEAD
 FOUNTAIN TROLL 73-643       84  26  2  375  D.A. REJECTS (352)         ERINIKA
 BRAND 82-13289              45  31  1  228  TOADS OF AMBER III (1180)  DWES EG
 RANDOM MATCHUP 96-1048      33  15  4  195  OVERRATED (1044)           OLD VALAMANTIS