AD

Date   : 02/26/2008    Duedate: 03/24/2008

CRYSALIS

DM-106    TURN-193

RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %  RANK TEAMS                  W    L  K    %
  1 SPARF! 54/1139       1925  961 25 66.7      WASTED SCUM 47/1112                   
    WAY TO GO! II 73/1010                       MYSTIC ORC FEAST 47/704               
    REAL BEER 21/859                          4-SUPERIOR FOR 71/1236   15   11  0 57.7
    D.A. REJECTS 44/38                        5 DARQUE FORCE 50/1241  107   96  1 52.7
    D.A. REJECTS 73/352                       6 TONGUE N CHE 82/1203   12   11  0 52.2
    WORLDWIDE GORE 26/35                      7 D-DAY SQUAD 34/551    512  527  4 49.3
    PARTY ANIMALS 5/476                         BLACK & BLUE 73/1090                  
    KING'S COURT 73/13                          KIWI CONNECTION 73/1232               
    THINGS GEORGE DOES 73/812                   PAUL'Z PHARTZ 65/985                  
    MILITARY MAYHEM 31/37                       ALL THE MUN'S MEN 37/219              
    ROYAL FLUSH 47/10                           BLOOD 4 THE MASSES 68/1239            
  2 DARK TOADS 2/1185     244  130  0 65.2      ALL-STAR NANA'S 67/787                
    DARK TOADS 65/1175                          KIWI CONNECTION 13/747                
    COLOR TUNES 82/1235                         DUELING FOR DOLLARS 25/558            
    TOADS OF AMBER III 82/1180                  OTAGO HIGHLANDERS 14/808              
    ANIMAL FARM 11/1095                       8 JANIX 54/1223         110  137  4 44.5
    CRAZY CREEPS 60/363                         THE BEAR'S PAW 47/196                 
    COLORIFIC 11/1050                           VALHALLA 28/1102                      
    FLOWER GIRLS 52/265                         PLAYPEN 14/1146                       
    CHEAP SHOTS 39/1160                       9 DOGS OF WAR 71/418      6    9  0 40.0
    DARK WARDS 9/1245                        10-AUTUMN LIGHT 31/1238   49   77  1 38.9
    DARK TOADS 04V 82/1244                   11 DRUID'S GROV 50/1041   13   21  2 38.2
    DARK TOADS 03A 82/1243                   12 DODGE BULLETS 28/867  382  675  4 36.1
    DARK TOADS 04W 82/1242                   13 FILIPINA LAD 28/1147    9   28  2 24.3
  3 OVERRATED 96/1044      98   71  1 58.0   14-DRAGONBANE G 81/1240    1    0  0  100
    UNFIT TO BE ORCS 31/881               

    '##/###' Avoid teams by their Team Id     '-'  Team did not fight this turn

                                  WARRIOR SPOTLIGHT

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                             ---===SLOW ARENA NEWS===---

                                     Duelmasters
                                     -----------
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 293): LORD BYRON of SMITHSONIAN (Curator, mgr.)
 DM  28 MORYA (turn 290): VAIDISAVA of THE PENTARCHY (Le Pentarque, mgr.)
 DM  31 CHIMLEVTAL (turn 288): COMMANDER SPUD of MILITARY MAYHEM (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 243): OPARA PERSI of THE MIDDLE WAY (Jorja, mgR.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 265): RAGGEDY ANN of DARQUE FORCES (Master Darque, mgr.)
 DM  47 DOUBLE X (turn 260): HANTA of DOK SIK KILLERS (Doc Sik, mgr.)
 DM  50 SNOWBOUND (turn 246): TRASH CAN of OPEN SESAME (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 240): PAS DE QUARTIER of BLOOD AND GUTS! (Le Pentarque, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 230): SKORINDELLE of TRADERS OF TROCAR (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 218): KONA QUAIL of ISLANDERS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 194): I OF THE KNEE DOLL of HAZAARDS OF CLONING (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 195): PORKY PIG of MEAT YOUR MAKER (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  73 ERINIKA (turn 195): BLACK EYE of BLACK & BLUE (The Mun, mgr.)
 DM  83 TELORINTHE (turn 10): GOSSIPID of INVIDIOTS (?, mgr.)

                                      Top Teams
                                      ---------
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 293): SMITHSONIAN (Curator, mgr.)
 DM  28 MORYA (turn 290): THE PENTARCHY (Le Pentarque, mgr.)
 DM  31 CHIMLEVTAL (turn 288): LORDS OF VALHALLA (High Lord Bosk, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 243): KIWI CONNECTION (The Mun, mgr.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 265): OF WOLF & MAN (Tripwire, mgr.)
 DM  47 DOUBLE X (turn 260): ROYAL FLUSH (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  50 SNOWBOUND (turn 246): LIFE IMPACTS (Smitty, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 240): FLOWER GIRLS (Lady Fern, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 230): TRADERS OF TROCAR (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 218): ISLANDERS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 194): THE ZOO (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 195): TITANS III (Brewmaster, mgr.)
 DM  73 ERINIKA (turn 195): MIDDLE WAY 18 (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  83 TELORINTHE (turn 10): INVIDIOTS (?, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
                                   ----------------
 DM  31 CHIMLEVTAL (turn 288): COMMANDER SPUD of MILITARY MAYHEM (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 243): OPARA PERSI of THE MIDDLE WAY (Jorja, mgR.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 265): RAGGEDY ANN of DARQUE FORCES (Master Darque, mgr.)
                               THE BRIDE of DARQUE FORCES (Master Darque, mgr.)
 DM  47 DOUBLE X (turn 259): TEMPUS of WARHAMMERS (Coyote, mgr.)
 DM  50 SNOWBOUND (turn 245): ADRIANN of DARQUE FORCES II (Master Darque, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 239): INSOLENT IRIS of FLOWER GIRLS (Lady Fern, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 228): GLUM of JANIX (Kat, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 191): AIKEN of SUPERIOR FORCES Y4 (Manager, mgr.)

                             REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER

     The magnificent sun, who was not Novgorodny Vir, rose at sunrise, banishing a
good portion of the snow on the ground and raising spirits generally.  Even a
necromancer can't raise that many spirits that quickly and easily.  Maybe they should
take a clue from that?

     But looking at the arena news, I see that Brand, the holder of the Crysaline
Helm, received eight challenges and was probably the Most Challenged Gladiator this
time.
     The Bear's Paw was avoided, with Royal Flush being in the forefront of the
avoidance.  Both from the same arena originally, I note.  Probably some history
there.
     We had twenty-seven fights, which counts as respectable.  Five standbys, which
is not good but could be and has been worse.  We'll take it.  Six challenges, none of
them TV.  Too bad.  Let's see some of those next time.  The longest fight was seven
minutes.  Seven minutes?  Ridiculous!  You can do better than that.  You're hardly
trying.

     LADY CONSOLACION (28-3703) (25-38-3,67) of FILIPINA LADYZ fought RIRORNI SOLDIER
(106-3) (0-0-0,30) of the College of Mimes.  LADY CONSOLACION assassinated RIRORNI
SOLDIER in a 1 minute gory uneven duel.  Rumor has it that the unfortunate Soldier
made improper suggestions.  Ah.
     SERB SMASHER (71-1393) (15-8-2,47) of DOGS OF WAR fought GLUM (54-2766) (16-6-
1,62) of JANIX.  SERB SMASHER vanquished GLUM in a 1 minute one-sided bout.  Glum is
a serb?  This is news to the rest of us.
     GHOST DANCER (28-3365) (26-18-0,49) of DODGE BULLETS fought ROXANNE DE'MORRE
(50-3449) (29-25-0,77) of DRUID'S GROVE.  GHOST DANCER slimly won victory over
ROXANNE DE'MORRE in a 2 minute bout.  Perhaps G.D. will be less pessimistic next
time.  And then again, perhaps not.  Anyone who spends his spare time dancing with
ghosts has to be a little strange.
     AMELIA (28-3417) (22-5-1,84) of DODGE BULLETS fought PUPPY ON PATROL (71-1613)
(18-9-0,63) of DOGS OF WAR.  AMELIA was vanquished by PUPPY ON PATROL in a 1 minute
one-sided fray.  Dodging bullets is one thing, dodging an eager pup quite something
else.  Attack of the tongue.
     DESPERADO (28-1152) (24-30-1,50) of DODGE BULLETS fought LADY DOMINGA (28-3702)
(21-42-0,58) of FILIPINA LADYZ.  DESPERADO narrowly defeated LADY DOMINGA in an
action packed 1 minute brutal match.  Is this any way to treat a fellow Moryan,
Desperado?
     FRED BEAR (47-5348) (23-12-0,124) of THE BEAR'S PAW fought SAMURAI STRIKER (71-
62) (18-15-1,100) of DOGS OF WAR.  FRED BEAR overpowered SAMURAI STRIKER in a popular
1 minute uneven fight.  So are we looking at someone here who strikes samurai?  Or a
samurai going on strike?  Interesting concept.  If all the warriors went on strike,
would that mean no more war?

     BLUE BLOOD (73-3657) (23-11-1,149) of BLACK & BLUE fought TINY TIM (60-6042)
(25-7-1,147) of CRAZY CREEPS.  BLUE BLOOD was narrowly defeated by TINY TIM in a
popular 7 minute gruesome fight.  This was our longest fight.  The ukulele music
wasn't bad, either.
     LOOGIE CLAP (82-46049) (24-18-2,110) of TONGUE N CHEEK fought MOSGIEL (14-3836)
(31-15-1,146) of OTAGO HIGHLANDERS.  LOOGIE CLAP overcame MOSGIEL in a popular 3
minute contest.  Just a bit embarrassing there, he?  But these things creep up on you
and give you a kick where you least expect it.
     BLACK FLAG (82-46046) (27-14-3,137) of TONGUE N CHEEK fought HARI-KARI (73-3049)
(19-5-0,150) of WAY TO GO! II.  BLACK FLAG was vanquished by HARI-KARI in an action
packed 1 minute one-sided match.  I'd've thought these two were a natural pair.  Just
shows what I know.
     BALDER (28-3778) (30-29-3,179) of VALHALLA fought YOUNG JOAN (28-3534) (28-24-
1,114) of DODGE BULLETS.  BALDER devastated YOUNG JOAN in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
Maybe it's Balder and not Joan who should be adventuring!  And for those who have
been making rude jokes, I name no names here, I note that Balder has a full head of
hair, and not a speck of scalp showing, you can hardly see his eyebrows.  Impressive.
     GEORGE WASHING TEN (47-2352) (69-45-0,180) of ROYAL FLUSH fought BILLY LILLY
(28-3416) (27-16-1,113) of DODGE BULLETS.  GEORGE WASHING TEN overpowered BILLY LILLY
in a 1 minute one-sided match.  Easier to dodge a bullet than a hatchet, is it,
Billy?

     DAIRY QUEEN (47-2685) (77-45-3,196) of ROYAL FLUSH fought CRYSALIS GUARD (106-
29) (0-0-0,200) of the College of Mimes.  DAIRY QUEEN narrowly defeated CRYSALIS
GUARD in an exciting 4 minute brutal bout.  She could have ended the fight faster, of
course, but the Guard was so smitten that he begged her to continue.
     SITS ON HIS DUFF (73-1810) (38-19-3,193) of THINGS GEORGE DOES fought CLOTTO
(106-25) (0-0-0,181) of the College of Mimes.  SITS ON HIS DUFF savagely defeated
CLOTTO in a crowd pleasing 2 minute bloody brawl.  Obviously, sitting around is not
the ONLY thing George does.  Good work.
     NEWT GINGRICH (5-3399) (86-30-0,188) of PARTY ANIMALS fought STIGMA OF STUPID
(31-4948) (36-21-1,196) of UNFIT TO BE ORCS.  NEWT GINGRICH was bested by STIGMA OF
STUPID in an action packed 1 minute duel.  Ah, and if Stigma is intellectually
challenged, what does that make Newt?
     JACK VALTRAEDS (47-407) (111-69-2,208) of ROYAL FLUSH fought TELGOR (106-27) (0-
0-0,200) of the College of Mimes.  JACK VALTRAEDS viciously subdued TELGOR in an
action packed 3 minute gory fight.  Good, I like to see that.  Some of these Mimes
are getting uppity.
     WEINERMUN (37-2635) (60-56-3,220) of ALL THE MUN'S MEN fought MAJOR DAMAGE (31-
600) (80-50-2,301) of MILITARY MAYHEM.  WEINERMUN was narrowly defeated by MAJOR
DAMAGE in a popular 3 minute bloody brawl.  I understand that major damage usually
strikes a weinermun in the form of a skewer and a bonfire.  Nasty.

     BEAR ACUDA (47-4995) (32-27-1,236) of THE BEAR'S PAW fought VENEMOUS PORCUPINE
(44-288) (83-61-0,328) of D.A. REJECTS.  BEAR ACUDA was viciously subdued by VENEMOUS
PORCUPINE in a 4 minute conflict.  However, the Poison Center reports that Bear is
responding well to the antidote.
     MORTICIAN (2-3890) (80-20-1,261) of DARK TOADS fought UNCERTAIN OMELET (47-3786)
(22-15-0,206) of MYSTIC ORC FEAST.  MORTICIAN savagely defeated UNCERTAIN OMELET in
an exciting 6 minute brutal fight.  And then, Mortician tried to bury the scrambled
eggs in the sand.  An natural impulse, I have no doubt, but it would have been messy
for the next fight.
     PET CEMETARY (73-605) (80-41-2,216) of KING'S COURT fought CRYSALIS GUARD (106-
29) (0-0-0,200) of the College of Mimes.  PET CEMETARY savagely defeated CRYSALIS
GUARD in an exciting 1 minute gruesome fight.  They tell me this Guard is something
of a dog, and now... well, he's lucky the arenamaster stepped in before he was
buried.
     DUTCH TREAT (26-1841) (105-36-2,263) of WORLDWIDE GORE fought HUNGRY BONES (31-
4720) (25-17-1,208) of UNFIT TO BE ORCS.  DUTCH TREAT viciously subdued HUNGRY BONES
in an action packed 2 minute gruesome fight.  Hungry was hospitalized due to
overeating something that seems to have involved chocolate, almonds, and heavy cream.
     PRIMUS (21-4975) (53-15-0,237) of REAL BEER fought TOADKILLER DOG (47-1103) (39-
17-1,298) of WASTED SCUM.  PRIMUS was overpowered by TOADKILLER DOG in an action
packed 3 minute uneven melee.  Can that Dog suck up the beer, or what?  Ah, don't
answer that.

     The challenge matches:
     LITTLE DEVIL (14-4359) (21-21-0,81) of PLAYPEN challenged DEVIL'S ADVOCATE (68-
4666) (10-4-0,60) of BLOOD 4 THE MASSES.  Down 21.  LITTLE DEVIL was overpowered by
DEVIL'S ADVOCATE in a 1 minute Challenge brawl.  Thus providing a lot of blood for
the masses, but I do wonder what the masses are going to do with it all.
     XYCO (54-2899) (18-11-3,99) of JANIX challenged GERRICK GRIMM (50-3530) (18-18-
1,100) of DRUID'S GROVE.  Up 1.  XYCO won victory over GERRICK GRIMM in a crowd
pleasing 1 minute Challenge fight.  And another record slides into loser-hood.  It's
probably something to do with the advance of the glaciers.
     IRRITATING BEGGAR (73-1110) (68-21-1,204) of D.A. REJECTS challenged AVONSIDE
(13-3927) (36-47-1,207) of KIWI CONNECTION.  Up 3.  IRRITATING BEGGAR overpowered
AVONSIDE in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match.  Avonside is now being treated for
intense irritation of the money-pouch.
     BOARISH YELTSIN (5-3109) (70-44-2,196) of PARTY ANIMALS challenged RANDOM
MATCHUP (96-1048) (36-18-4,201) of OVERRATED.  Up 5.  BOARISH YELTSIN slimly lost to
RANDOM MATCHUP in a popular 1 minute Challenge contest.  Worse than a blind date, eh,
Boarish?
     KING UVDAHELL (47-1643) (51-28-1,198) of ROYAL FLUSH challenged WHEEL OF FORTUNE
(25-2529) (50-52-2,203) of DUELING FOR DOLLARS.  Up 5.  KING UVDAHELL handily
defeated WHEEL OF FORTUNE in a 1 minute Challenge match.  Amazing how an axe to the 
axle will stop a wheel from spinning.  One of life's little mysteries.

     And for the title:  BRAND (82-13289) (49-31-1,296) of TOADS OF AMBER III
challenged GERMAN SHEPARD (26-916) (100-58-0,378) of WORLDWIDE GORE.  Up 82.  BRAND
devastated GERMAN SHEPARD in a 2 minute mismatched Challenge Title fight.  An amazing
effort, which Brand is to be saluted.  And we hope he isn't too tire THIS time to do
a column.

                                       Ardane

THE TOWER GUARDIAN            W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 BRAND 82-13289              50  31  1  330  TOADS OF AMBER III (1180)  DWES EG

GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS    W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 VENEMOUS PORCUPINE 44-288   84  61  0  339  D.A. REJECTS (38)          KRILL
 TOADKILLER DOG 47-1103      40  17  1  330  WASTED SCUM (1112)         NORTH FORK
 MAJOR DAMAGE 31-600         81  50  2  311  MILITARY MAYHEM (37)       CHIMLEVTAL
 DUTCH TREAT 26-1841        106  36  2  275  WORLDWIDE GORE (35)        CALEAM
 MORTICIAN 2-3890            81  20  1  273  DARK TOADS (1185)          NIANIA
-AMPLITUR 65-6440            25   5  1  265  DARK TOADS (1175)          DAL SHANG
-VIKING RAIDER 54-2885       23   5  1  243  SPARF! (1139)              TROCAR
 STIGMA OF STUPID 31-4948    37  21  1  228  UNFIT TO BE ORCS (881)     CHIMLEVTAL
 PET CEMETARY 73-605         81  41  2  224  KING'S COURT (13)          ERINIKA
 RANDOM MATCHUP 96-1048      37  18  4  219  OVERRATED (1044)           OLD VALAMANTIS
-GROLSCH 21-5029             48  10  4  217  REAL BEER (859)            SUNSET
 JACK VALTRAEDS 47-407      112  69  2  216  ROYAL FLUSH (10)           NORTH FORK

GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS    W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 IRRITATING BEGGAR 73-1110   69  21  1  215  D.A. REJECTS (352)         ERINIKA

GRAND CHAMPIONS               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 KING UVDAHELL 47-1643       52  28  1  210  ROYAL FLUSH (10)           NORTH FORK
 HUNGRY BONES 31-4720        25  18  1  210  UNFIT TO BE ORCS (881)     CHIMLEVTAL
 UNCERTAIN OMELET 47-3786    22  16  0  210  MYSTIC ORC FEAST (704)     NORTH FORK
-BLUE VELVET 11-6248         32  11  0  207  COLORIFIC (1050)           ARUAK CITY
 DAIRY QUEEN 47-2685         78  45  3  206  ROYAL FLUSH (10)           NORTH FORK
 WEINERMUN 37-2635           60  57  3  206  ALL THE MUN'S MEN (219)    SIBIKHAS
-RAVISHING REDBUD 52-3197    35  13  0  203  FLOWER GIRLS (265)         FRATSFA
 AVONSIDE 13-3927            36  48  1  202  KIWI CONNECTION (747)      DULLENS
 BEAR ACUDA 47-4995          32  28  1  202  THE BEAR'S PAW (196)       NORTH FORK
-AB DESTINED 4 THE  65-1154  16   8  2  199  PAUL'Z PHARTZ (985)        DAL SHANG
 SITS ON HIS DUFF 73-1810    39  19  3  198  THINGS GEORGE DOES (812)   ERINIKA
 BOARISH YELTSIN 5-3109      70  45  2  197  PARTY ANIMALS (476)        KALTOS
 PRIMUS 21-4975              53  16  0  197  REAL BEER (859)            SUNSET
 GERMAN SHEPARD 26-916      100  59  0  195  WORLDWIDE GORE (35)        CALEAM
 WHEEL OF FORTUNE 25-2529    50  53  2  195  DUELING FOR DOLLARS (558)  LYRATILAN
 NEWT GINGRICH 5-3399        86  31  0  189  PARTY ANIMALS (476)        KALTOS
-VIOLET VULTURE 11-6612      26   4  0  183  ANIMAL FARM (1095)         ARUAK CITY
 GEORGE WASHING TEN 47-2352  70  45  0  182  ROYAL FLUSH (10)           NORTH FORK
 BALDER 28-3778              31  29  3  181  VALHALLA (1102)            MORYA

GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS       W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
-BEARNICE 47-2847            31  42  7  180  THE BEAR'S PAW (196)       NORTH FORK
 HARI-KARI 73-3049           20   5  0  165  WAY TO GO! II (1010)       ERINIKA
 TINY TIM 60-6042            26   7  1  162  CRAZY CREEPS (363)         ARADI

GRAND ADEPTS                  W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 BLUE BLOOD 73-3657          23  12  1  150  BLACK & BLUE (1090)        ERINIKA
-U.S.S. ARIZONA 34-2643      25  18  1  143  D-DAY SQUAD (551)          MONUNTIAL
 LOOGIE CLAP 82--19487       25  18  2  142  TONGUE N CHEEK (1203)      DWES EG
 BLACK FLAG 82--19490        27  15  3  134  TONGUE N CHEEK (1203)      DWES EG
 FRED BEAR 47-5348           24  12  0  131  THE BEAR'S PAW (196)       NORTH FORK
 MOSGIEL 14-3836             31  16  1  128  OTAGO HIGHLANDERS (808)    TOBIR
 BILLY LILLY 28-3416         27  17  1  126  DODGE BULLETS (867)        MORYA
-INSOLENT IRIS 52-3323       38  10  0  124  FLOWER GIRLS (265)         FRATSFA
 YOUNG JOAN 28-3534          28  25  1  121  DODGE BULLETS (867)        MORYA
-KISSYFUR 67-2187            25  15  1  110  ALL-STAR NANA'S (787)      BARIKALA
 XYCO 54-2899                19  11  3  106  JANIX (1223)               TROCAR
-DARQUE 75-3185              31   8  2  103  MANAGER MUSINGS (1163)     JADE MOUNTAIN

GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES    W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 SAMURAI STRIKER 71-62       18  16  1   99  DOGS OF WAR (418)          KYR'TERR
 GERRICK GRIMM 50-3530       18  19  1   96  DRUID'S GROVE (1041)       SNOWBOUND
 PUPPY ON PATROL 71-1613     19   9  0   93  DOGS OF WAR (418)          KYR'TERR
-OPARA PERSI 39-3670         23  22  0   91  THE MIDDLE WAY (946)       XOCHITHLAN

GRAND INITIATES               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
-KARATIA 73-3624             20   4  1   90  KIWI CONNECTION (1232)     ERINIKA
-TEMPUS 47-4635              21  25  1   89  WARHAMMERS (289)           NORTH FORK
-SWAMP BURP HAMMER 47-5439   22  16  2   84  ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ (1187)   NORTH FORK
 DEVIL'S ADVOCATE 68-4666    11   4  0   81  BLOOD 4 THE MASSES (1239)  FIREHOLD
-YELLOW SUBMARINE 82--32217  19   9  0   77  COLOR TUNES (1235)         DWES EG
-ANVIL IRONFIST 81-84        24   4  0   76  DRAGONBANE GUILD (1240)    SHADOWSPIRE
 GHOST DANCER 28-3365        27  18  0   73  DODGE BULLETS (867)        MORYA
-SKULK 39-3603               16   1  0   71  CHEAP SHOTS (1160)         XOCHITHLAN
 SERB SMASHER 71-1393        16   8  2   70  DOGS OF WAR (418)          KYR'TERR
 LADY CONSOLACION 28-3703    26  38  4   69  FILIPINA LADYZ (1147)      MORYA
-SIPPYCUP SAM 14-4280        21  21  3   69  PLAYPEN (1146)             TOBIR
-NOSFERATU 9-4946            19  11  0   68  DARK WARDS (1245)          ZUKAL
 AMELIA 28-3417              22   6  1   66  DODGE BULLETS (867)        MORYA
 LITTLE DEVIL 14-4359        21  22  0   62  PLAYPEN (1146)             TOBIR

GRAND INITIATES               W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 ROXANNE DE'MORRE 50-3449    29  26  0   61  DRUID'S GROVE (1041)       SNOWBOUND
-WAIMATE 14-3172             18  11  1   61  OTAGO HIGHLANDERS (808)    TOBIR
 DESPERADO 28-1152           25  30  1   60  DODGE BULLETS (867)        MORYA
-SLUGBAIT 75-3245            18   6  0   60  MANAGER MUSINGS (1163)     JADE MOUNTAIN
-WYVERN 82-29373             12   5  0   56  DARK TOADS 04W (1242)      DWES EG
-ADRIANNE 50-3190            14   7  1   50  DARQUE FORCES II (1241)    SNOWBOUND
 LADY DOMINGA 28-3702        21  43  0   49  FILIPINA LADYZ (1147)      MORYA
 GLUM 54-2766                16   7  1   46  JANIX (1223)               TROCAR
-OBERON 31-6133               6   3  1   22  AUTUMN LIGHTNING (1238)    CHIMLEVTAL

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                   W   L  K TEAM NAME              SLAIN BY                  TURN
RIRORNI SOLDIER            0   0  0                        LADY CONSOLACION 106-3703 193

                               PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE

Hey, look at all these warriors!  Glad to see Slugbait and Crip quite active. -- The
Consortium Folk

Random Matchup -- Whoa!  You were one tough cookie! -- Brand (Too tired from the
Random Matchup random matchup to write a DN Column.)

     Excuses.

Bearnice -- Yes, it is true that I like winning a fight now and then.  That was way
too close. -- Blue Velvet

Balder -- I challenged you because you look so much like me--you know, BALDer, BALD
eagles, and BALD vultures.  Get it? -- Violet Vulture (violet bald vulture)

Newt Gingrich -- Wow.  That was unexpected! -- Bear Acuda

Violet Vulture -- "Unbelievably" or not--well fought! -- Balder

Blue Velvet -- After 8 years on the sands, that loss leads to my final retirement.
Salute. - Bearnice

Ghost Dancer -- Care to dance again?  I rather enjoyed it. -- Glum

Black Flag -- I double what Billy Lilly said last month.  Owch. -- Fred Bear

Blue Blood -- I don't know why the handicapper thinks we're a good match.  We've
already done this.  Not that a skill isn't worth receiving any way I can get it. --
Young Joan

     What handicapper?  *I* did it.  I just felt like it. -- MUG #84723, known to
     many as Kurmuskt the Whimsical
     P.S.  I felt there was more to be drawn out between the two of you than showed
     last time.

Mosgiel -- Remind me to invite you along for my next bar fight.  You'd be a good man
to have at my side. -- Billy Lilly

Billy -- Why not just avoid your next bar fight?  You're getting a little long in the
tooth for that kind of stuff. -- Young Joan

Joan -- Ah, you've never been in a bar fight, have you?  The pleasures involved
transcend age. -- Billy Lilly

Waimate -- Tell me about this Otago place.  I need a holiday (already!), and I'd like
somewhere new and relaxing. -- Amelia
P.S.  Especially now that Acapulco is full of Delarquans.

Devil's Advocate -- Clever of you to get a number to go with your name, very
appropriate.  And thanks for the skills.  But I had to end it quickly, even if it
meant taking a loss.  I might be into taking dangerous risks, but having the Greywand
looking over my shoulder is not one of them. -- Desperado

Glum -- Oh, thanks, that loss is JUST what I need as I stand here feeling a terribly
draft blowing my way from some horrible, dangerous location.  I really don't WANT to
adventure.  I told Uncle Wolf that when he first approached me.  I'm not READY for
this kind of stuff, you know?  Oh, well. -- Ghost Dancer
P.S.  Good fight, I guess, even if you didn't teach me a single skill to help out.
P.P.S.  Well, I was probably too upset to pay attention properly.
P.P.P.S.  Ketchum, go ahead and ramble.  You're as far off the mark as you could be,
but if rambling makes your socks roll up and down, go for it.

     My socks never roll up and down.  That's what garters are for.

Ketchum -- That's because I never fly here, of course. -- Amelia

Yellow Submarine -- Do you sail to the Spirit Lands? -- Ghost Dancer, considering
alternatives to swimming

28 January 2008
CALLING ALL THUGS, BRUTES, OGRES, QUARTER HALF WITS, SHALLOW HALBERD ENTHUSIASTS AND
MAUL RATS:  Since the Bashing style has often been maligned in the forums, it is time
to give the style a little tough love with the following concept:  An ALL-BASHER
arena.  The rules are simple--enter the arena as a rookie basher.  That's it.  RSI
said I need to get 20 managers on board and I'm about half way there.  If you are
interested in taking part, PM me in the forums or email me:  chase at accesspr.com
and put D2 in the subject header.

Chase a.k.a. SwineTiger

2 February 2008
ATTENTION EVERYONE -- In March I am going to do manager lists for all arenas.  This
is part of my ongoing and undoubtedly largely futile attempt to get my lists
organized.  If you think I might not know who you are or if you think I might and
you'd rather I not share that information, let me know this month!  You can e-mail
me at Sue at solberg dash mathews dot com (replacing the at, dash and dot with
appropriate characters.  You can send a diplo to The Saint.  You can put an ad in
the newsletter.  Semaphore doesn't work so well, nor does telepathy. -- The Saint,
keeper of lists

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

BRAND devastated GERMAN SHEPARD in a 2 minute mismatched Challenge Title fight.
KING UVDAHELL handily defeated WHEEL OF FORTUNE in a 1 minute Challenge match.
BOARISH YELTSIN slimly lost to RANDOM MATCHUP in a popular 1 minute Challenge contest.
IRRITATING BEGGAR overpowered AVONSIDE in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match.
XYCO won victory over GERRICK GRIMM in a crowd pleasing 1 minute Challenge fight.
LITTLE DEVIL was overpowered by DEVIL'S ADVOCATE in a 1 minute Challenge brawl.
PRIMUS was overpowered by TOADKILLER DOG in a action packed 3 minute uneven melee.
DUTCH TREAT viciously subdued HUNGRY BONES in a action packed 2 minute gruesome fight.
PET CEMETARY savagely defeated CRYSALIS GUARD in a exciting 1 minute gruesome fight.
MORTICIAN savagely defeated UNCERTAIN OMELET in a exciting 6 minute brutal fight.
BEAR ACUDA was viciously subdued by VENEMOUS PORCUPINE in a 4 minute conflict.
WEINERMUN was narrowly defeated by MAJOR DAMAGE in a popular 3 minute bloody brawl.
JACK VALTRAEDS viciously subdued TELGOR in a action packed 3 minute gory fight.
NEWT GINGRICH was bested by STIGMA OF STUPID in a action packed 1 minute duel.
SITS ON HIS DUFF savagely defeated CLOTTO in a crowd pleasing 2 minute bloody brawl.
DAIRY QUEEN narrowly defeated CRYSALIS GUARD in a exciting 4 minute brutal bout.
GEORGE WASHING TEN overpowered BILLY LILLY in a 1 minute one-sided match.
BALDER devastated YOUNG JOAN in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
BLACK FLAG was vanquished by HARI-KARI in a action packed 1 minute one-sided match.
LOOGIE CLAP overcame MOSGIEL in a popular 3 minute contest.
BLUE BLOOD was narrowly defeated by TINY TIM in a popular 7 minute gruesome fight.
FRED BEAR overpowered SAMURAI STRIKER in a popular 1 minute uneven fight.
DESPERADO narrowly defeated LADY DOMINGA in a action packed 1 minute brutal match.
AMELIA was vanquished by PUPPY ON PATROL in a 1 minute one-sided fray.
GHOST DANCER slimly won victory over ROXANNE DE'MORRE in a 2 minute bout.
SERB SMASHER vanquished GLUM in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
LADY CONSOLACION assassinated RIRORNI SOLDIER in a 1 minute gory uneven duel.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                   9         TOTAL PARRY       67 -  30 -  0      69  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      8         LUNGING ATTACK    72 -  49 -  1      60  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    8         PARRY-STRIKE       4 -   3 -  0      57  |
|AIMED BLOW                       6         PARRY-RIPOSTE     19 -  16 -  0      54  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    5         AIMED BLOW        30 -  30 -  0      50  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  5         STRIKING ATTACK   16 -  18 -  1      47  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  4         WALL OF STEEL     38 -  53 -  2      42  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   2         BASHING ATTACK    16 -  23 -  2      41  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      2         SLASHING ATTACK   22 -  35 -  0      39  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     0         PARRY-LUNGE        9 -  20 -  0      31  |

Turn 193 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

BASHING ATTACK     2 -  0     PARRY-RIPOSTE      2 -  3         4  LUNGING ATTACK 
TOTAL PARRY        7 -  1     SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  4         3  TOTAL PARRY    
LUNGING ATTACK     6 -  3     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  2         1  PARRY-RIPOSTE  
AIMED BLOW         3 -  3     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  0         1  WALL OF STEEL  
STRIKING ATTACK    2 -  2                                       1  SLASHING ATTACK
WALL OF STEEL      4 -  4                                       1  STRIKING ATTACK

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
LUNGING ATTACK   BRAND 82-13289             50  31  1  330 TOADS OF AMBER III (1180)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    VENEMOUS PORCUPINE 44-288  84  61  0  339 D.A. REJECTS (38)
TOTAL PARRY      TOADKILLER DOG 47-1103     40  17  1  330 WASTED SCUM (1112)
WALL OF STEEL    MAJOR DAMAGE 31-600        81  50  2  311 MILITARY MAYHEM (37)
STRIKING ATTACK  STIGMA OF STUPID 31-4948   37  21  1  228 UNFIT TO BE ORCS (881)
AIMED BLOW       HUNGRY BONES 31-4720       25  18  1  210 UNFIT TO BE ORCS (881)
SLASHING ATTACK  WEINERMUN 37-2635          60  57  3  206 ALL THE MUN'S MEN (219)
PARRY-LUNGE      AVONSIDE 13-3927           36  48  1  202 KIWI CONNECTION (747)
BASHING ATTACK   SERB SMASHER 71-1393       16   8  2   70 DOGS OF WAR (418)

The overall popularity leader is JACK VALTRAEDS 47-407.  The most popular warrior 
this turn was BLUE BLOOD 73-3657.  The ten other most popular fighters were 
TOADKILLER DOG 47-1103, BRAND 82-13289, MORTICIAN 2-3890, UNCERTAIN OMELET 47-3786, 
VENEMOUS PORCUPINE 44-288, JACK VALTRAEDS 47-407, SITS ON HIS DUFF 73-1810, WEINERMUN 
37-2635, DAIRY QUEEN 47-2685, and MOSGIEL 14-3836.

The least popular fighter this week was GLUM 54-2766.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were AMELIA 28-3417, YOUNG JOAN 28-3534, LITTLE DEVIL 14-4359, SAMURAI 
STRIKER 71-62, BLACK FLAG 82--19490, BILLY LILLY 28-3416, DEVIL'S ADVOCATE 68-4666, 
GERRICK GRIMM 50-3530, LADY CONSOLACION 28-3703, and SERB SMASHER 71-1393.

Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  
NIANIA(2)            1  0 0  MORYA(28)            4  4 1  ARADI(60)            1  0 0  
KALTOS(5)            0  2 0  CHIMLEVTAL(31)       2  1 0  FIREHOLD(68)         1  0 0  
DULLENS(13)          0  1 0  SIBIKHAS(37)         0  1 0  KYR'TERR(71)         2  1 0  
TOBIR(14)            0  2 0  KRILL(44)            1  0 0  ERINIKA(73)          4  1 0  
SUNSET(21)           0  1 0  NORTH FORK(47)       6  2 0  DWES EG(82)          2  1 0  
LYRATILAN(25)        0  1 0  SNOWBOUND(50)        0  2 0  OLD VALAMANTIS(96)   1  0 0  
CALEAM(26)           1  1 0  TROCAR(54)           1  1 0  

TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 MORTICIAN 2-3890            81  20  1  273  DARK TOADS (1185)          NIANIA
 BOARISH YELTSIN 5-3109      70  45  2  197  PARTY ANIMALS (476)        KALTOS
 AVONSIDE 13-3927            36  48  1  202  KIWI CONNECTION (747)      DULLENS
 MOSGIEL 14-3836             31  16  1  128  OTAGO HIGHLANDERS (808)    TOBIR
 PRIMUS 21-4975              53  16  0  197  REAL BEER (859)            SUNSET
 WHEEL OF FORTUNE 25-2529    50  53  2  195  DUELING FOR DOLLARS (558)  LYRATILAN
 DUTCH TREAT 26-1841        106  36  2  275  WORLDWIDE GORE (35)        CALEAM
 BALDER 28-3778              31  29  3  181  VALHALLA (1102)            MORYA
 MAJOR DAMAGE 31-600         81  50  2  311  MILITARY MAYHEM (37)       CHIMLEVTAL
 WEINERMUN 37-2635           60  57  3  206  ALL THE MUN'S MEN (219)    SIBIKHAS
 VENEMOUS PORCUPINE 44-288   84  61  0  339  D.A. REJECTS (38)          KRILL
 TOADKILLER DOG 47-1103      40  17  1  330  WASTED SCUM (1112)         NORTH FORK
 GERRICK GRIMM 50-3530       18  19  1   96  DRUID'S GROVE (1041)       SNOWBOUND
 XYCO 54-2899                19  11  3  106  JANIX (1223)               TROCAR
 TINY TIM 60-6042            26   7  1  162  CRAZY CREEPS (363)         ARADI
 DEVIL'S ADVOCATE 68-4666    11   4  0   81  BLOOD 4 THE MASSES (1239)  FIREHOLD
 SAMURAI STRIKER 71-62       18  16  1   99  DOGS OF WAR (418)          KYR'TERR
 PET CEMETARY 73-605         81  41  2  224  KING'S COURT (13)          ERINIKA
 BRAND 82-13289              50  31  1  330  TOADS OF AMBER III (1180)  DWES EG
 RANDOM MATCHUP 96-1048      37  18  4  219  OVERRATED (1044)           OLD VALAMANTIS