AD Date : 02/14/2012 Duedate: 02/27/2012 STORM ROCK ARENA DM 107 TURN 15 RANK TEAMS W L K % RANK TEAMS W L K % 1 COLOR ME SUA 42/365 80 47 1 63.0 6 END 13/298 28 32 1 46.7 CENTER FOR OLDS 18/364 SHEPHERDS 18/359 2 FUCHI OWNED 81/346 9 7 0 56.2 FOUND IN THE SAND 32/360 3 DARQUE AGES 81/335 24 20 1 54.5 GOT IT FOR CHRISTMAS 65/361 DARQUE FORCES 31/318 7 MID EARTH 29/316 22 30 0 42.3 DARQUE FORCES 45/348 YAMA BUSHI 30/317 IMPROVED ILLUSION 59/349 CLAN LONGBEARD 81/374 4 SEA DOGS 1/300 16 14 0 53.3 8 VIKINGS 10/355 13 25 0 34.2 SEA DOGS 18/309 SENTINELS 7/354 DUNGEON CELL 42/347 NOMADIC TRIBE 21/310 5 OF WOLF AND 81/343 32 29 1 52.5 DRAGONBANE GUILD 81/334 THE GUARDIAN'S FORUM Reflections by the Champion of the Horn My apologies for the lack of a column last turn. Assur has me working non-stop. He says he has big plans for me and doesn't give me time for anything I like to do. I don't see what the big deal is. And this turn he reminded me at the last minute so here I am, when I'm supposed to be preparing for a fight, writing this column. My challenge and expected opponent will be Moist Towelette. The Four of Spades is a nasty trick. You think you can beat it, but it slips under the radar and then wins. Nasty Lungers! I'll take anyone other than him, even one of those uber open handed freaks. That is it for now. I can only hope for another turn here on the throne. It certainly took long enough to convince my fellow basher from Delaware to relinquish it! -- Shiny Penny REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER Okay, I'm late and I'm gonna be rushed with this. Why am I late? My fault. I could see the end of Chapter 21, which I was beginning to think would never appear, and I didn't want to take a chance on losing it. So, I pursued that when I should've been writing this spy report. And I can't even say it will never happen again. Well, not with that particular chapter, but... who knows? So make the most of this. Fight with the biggest point movements: Dominatrix (up 28) versus Plankton (down 19). Most avoided was Color Me Suave, by Dragonbane Guild. Most challenged, the Champion of the Horn, Captain of the Guard, Top of the Heap, Duelmaster: Shiny Penny. Seventeen fights, six challenges, two standbys. THE HYPHEN-DASH (42-4499) (21-13-1,85) of COLOR ME SUAVE fought ALASTARIAN DESERTER (107-1) (0-0-0,30) of Really Boring Standbys. THE HYPHEN-DASH overpowered ALASTARIAN DESERTER in a 1 minute one-sided match. I should hope so! Let's get these standbys renamed before the end of the month, okay? I'd *prefer* not something totally goofy, but... we need changes. JELLO KNUCKLES (42-4554) (30-15-0,27) of COLOR ME SUAVE fought LHISSON (29-5456) (28-29-0,53) of MID EARTH. JELLO KNUCKLES was devastated by LHISSON in a 2 minute gory mismatched brawl. This is what happens when you put fruit in your jello. It loses cohesion. That's a fancy word for "falls apart under stress." AZAGHAL (81-1223) (21-22-0,83) of DRAGONBANE GUILD fought 1977 AMC MATADOR (42- 4116) (42-31-0,70) of COLOR ME SUAVE. AZAGHAL was bested by 1977 AMC MATADOR in an action packed 3 minute brutal duel. They tell me that this particular Matador is not a bullfighter but a chariot. Okay, if you say so. Hard to visualize. RAGGEDY ANN (45-4148) (34-14-0,127) of DARQUE FORCES fought ZEVRAN (81-1258) (25-30-1,147) of OF WOLF AND MAN. RAGGEDY ANN was handily defeated by ZEVRAN in a 2 minute one-sided conflict. And was Ann wearing a red hood, by any chance? Because that Wolf GOT her. PINCH BLISTER (18-9859) (31-26-0,121) of CENTER FOR OLDS fought VIRGINIA, NO SANTA (65-6623) (26-17-1,121) of GOT IT FOR CHRISTMAS. PINCH BLISTER subdued VIRGINIA, NO SANTA in a 2 minute gory brawl. If the shoe doesn't fit, Virginia, you shouldn't be wearing it. LAZY LOOKOUT (42-4504) (35-28-1,165) of DUNGEON CELL fought RINDEL (29-5346) (30-25-0,160) of MID EARTH. LAZY LOOKOUT was handily defeated by RINDEL in a 2 minute one-sided contest. Sloth seldom pays. I won't say never, because that would be just asking for trouble. FROO-FROO (18-9589) (44-32-4,190) of CENTER FOR OLDS fought TING-TING (81-776) (34-18-0,174) of FUCHI OWNED. FROO-FROO overpowered TING-TING in a crowd pleasing 1 minute one-sided match. Somehow, these two seemed like a well-matched pair to me. But I have different criteria. HEINRIK (81-1257) (31-26-1,183) of CLAN LONGBEARD fought EVANGELION (59-2340) (23-19-1,172) of IMPROVED ILLUSION. HEINRIK was defeated by EVANGELION in an action packed 4 minute gory match. They *say* that magic can't be used in the arena, but that "illusion" of Eva's.... What *is* "op-art," anyway? PLANKTON (18-9748) (31-28-2,195) of SEA DOGS fought DOMINATRIX (81-583) (30-17- 3,169) of OF WOLF AND MAN. PLANKTON was vanquished by DOMINATRIX in an action packed 2 minute gory uneven fight. I do wonder why anyone would want to dominate plankton, but then, I'm not a fish. Or a whale, or whatever. DELAWARE RUN (42-4400) (80-55-5,192) of COLOR ME SUAVE fought GRATH (81-581) (34-16-1,174) of OF WOLF AND MAN. DELAWARE RUN overpowered GRATH in an action packed 2 minute gruesome uneven melee. Ran right over him, in fact. FOUR OF SPADES (42-4234) (68-41-2,229) of COLOR ME SUAVE fought TELGOR (107-27) (0-0-0,200) of Really Boring Standbys. FOUR OF SPADES was overpowered by TELGOR in a 1 minute mismatched brawl. With a more interesting standby, who is to say, maybe Four would have kept his mind on the job. The challenges: CAJETAN (7-6036) (18-16-1,61) of SENTINELS challenged BEDDER (18-10043) (19-10- 2,68) of CENTER FOR OLDS. Up 7. CAJETAN lost to BEDDER in a crowd pleasing 3 minute Challenge fight. Do not ask me to explain this, it has left me totally confused. LORD EXETER (81-932) (27-18-1,97) of DRAGONBANE GUILD challenged FAN ZHEN (81- 1288) (21-12-2,110) of DARQUE AGES. Up 13. LORD EXETER demolished FAN ZHEN in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge competition. You may have to come in out of the darque to win, Fan Zhen. GAD (18-9239) (31-23-1,118) of SHEPHERDS challenged THE BRIDE (45-4180) (29-12- 1,142) of DARQUE FORCES. Up 24. GAD was viciously subdued by THE BRIDE in a 2 minute gory Challenge fight. Good gad! But not quite good enough. JOSH (18-9109) (22-11-0,110) of SHEPHERDS challenged ALMOST PRETTY (42-4496) (41-30-0,162) of COLOR ME SUAVE. Up 52. JOSH was defeated by ALMOST PRETTY in a crowd pleasing 1 minute Challenge duel. You asked for that one, Josh. OBROJOBO (7-5869) (21-20-1,135) of SENTINELS challenged ARIOCH (81-996) (28-24- 3,139) of OF WOLF AND MAN. Up 4. OBROJOBO demolished ARIOCH in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge melee. I think it's Obrojobo's name. Either that, or the smash he drinks. For the title: SHINY PENNY (32-3789) (61-112-2,233) of FOUND IN THE SAND challenged MOIST TOWELETTE (42-4430) (53-41-4,212) of COLOR ME SUAVE. Down 21, which isn't much from the top. SHINY PENNY was devastated by MOIST TOWELETTE in a 1 minute Challenge Title fight. Dare I say, "Moist Towelette cleaned up"? Good work, both of you. Larkin CHAMPION OF THE HORN W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY MOIST TOWELETTE 42-4430 54 41 4 223 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) RODEKI GRAND CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY DELAWARE RUN 42-4400 81 55 5 209 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) RODEKI FROO-FROO 18-9589 45 32 4 205 CENTER FOR OLDS (364) TALCAMA DOMINATRIX 81-583 31 17 3 197 OF WOLF AND MAN (343) SHADOWSPIRE SHINY PENNY 32-3789 61 113 2 193 FOUND IN THE SAND (360) ARVAT FOUR OF SPADES 42-4234 68 42 2 190 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) RODEKI EVANGELION 59-2340 24 19 1 187 IMPROVED ILLUSION (349) ILLIS GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY RINDEL 29-5346 31 25 178 MID EARTH (316) LAPUR GRATH 81-581 34 17 1 176 OF WOLF AND MAN (343) SHADOWSPIRE PLANKTON 18-9748 31 29 2 176 SEA DOGS (309) TALCAMA HEINRIK 81-1257 31 27 1 176 CLAN LONGBEARD (374) SHADOWSPIRE TING-TING 81-776 34 19 171 FUCHI OWNED (346) SHADOWSPIRE ZEVRAN 81-1258 26 30 1 165 OF WOLF AND MAN (343) SHADOWSPIRE ALMOST PRETTY 42-4496 42 30 164 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) RODEKI LAZY LOOKOUT 42-4504 35 29 1 154 DUNGEON CELL (347) RODEKI GRAND ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY OBROJOBO 7-5869 22 20 1 150 SENTINELS (354) BONSUR THE BRIDE 45-4180 30 12 1 146 DARQUE FORCES (348) STORMCROWE PINCH BLISTER 18-9859 32 26 132 CENTER FOR OLDS (364) TALCAMA ARIOCH 81-996 28 25 3 128 OF WOLF AND MAN (343) SHADOWSPIRE GAD 18-9239 31 24 1 124 SHEPHERDS (359) TALCAMA RAGGEDY ANN 45-4148 34 15 123 DARQUE FORCES (348) STORMCROWE JOSH 18-9109 22 12 121 SHEPHERDS (359) TALCAMA LORD EXETER 81-932 28 18 1 119 DRAGONBANE GUILD (334) SHADOWSPIRE VIRGINIA, NO SANTA 65-6623 26 18 1 119 GOT IT FOR CHRISTMAS (361) DAL SHANG GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY FAN ZHEN 81-1288 21 13 2 96 DARQUE AGES (335) SHADOWSPIRE GRAND INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY THE HYPHEN-DASH 42-4499 22 13 1 87 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) RODEKI 1977 AMC MATADOR 42-4116 43 31 85 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) RODEKI -DOPPLEGANGER 81-1382 19 21 78 MONSTER MANUAL (377) SHADOWSPIRE AZAGHAL 81-1223 21 23 77 DRAGONBANE GUILD (334) SHADOWSPIRE BEDDER 18-10043 20 10 2 75 CENTER FOR OLDS (364) TALCAMA LHISSON 29-5456 29 29 65 MID EARTH (316) LAPUR -CHATROOMMATE 18-10034 17 14 65 CENTER FOR OLDS (364) TALCAMA CAJETAN 7-6036 18 17 1 62 SENTINELS (354) BONSUR JELLO KNUCKLES 42-4554 30 16 24 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) RODEKI '-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn. THE DEAD W L K TEAM NAME SLAIN BY TURN PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE Delaware Run -- Getting beaten by a medium shield is just plain embarrassing. -- Lazy Lookout Zevran -- I need to hit the weights, clearly. -- Virginia Froo-Froo -- The pleasure was all mine, really! -- Shiny Penny Obrojobo -- Your name rolls off the tongue very nicely. The loss you gave me does not. -- Gad Lord Exeter -- Thanks for all! -- Josh And so the race to the bottom rank is delayed another turn! -- Assur LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS SHINY PENNY was devastated by MOIST TOWELETTE in a 1 minute Challenge Title fight. OBROJOBO demolished ARIOCH in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge melee. JOSH was defeated by ALMOST PRETTY in a crowd pleasing 1 minute Challenge duel. GAD was viciously subdued by THE BRIDE in a 2 minute gory Challenge fight. LORD EXETER demolished FAN ZHEN in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge competition. CAJETAN lost to BEDDER in a crowd pleasing 3 minute Challenge fight. FOUR OF SPADES was overpowered by TELGOR in a 1 minute mismatched brawl. DELAWARE RUN overpowered GRATH in a action packed 2 minute gruesome uneven melee. PLANKTON was vanquished by DOMINATRIX in a action packed 2 minute gory uneven fight. HEINRIK was defeated by EVANGELION in a action packed 4 minute gory match. FROO-FROO overpowered TING-TING in a crowd pleasing 1 minute one-sided match. LAZY LOOKOUT was handily defeated by RINDEL in a 2 minute one-sided contest. PINCH BLISTER subdued VIRGINIA, NO SANTA in a 2 minute gory brawl. RAGGEDY ANN was handily defeated by ZEVRAN in a 2 minute one-sided conflict. AZAGHAL was bested by 1977 AMC MATADOR in a action packed 3 minute brutal duel. JELLO KNUCKLES was devastated by LHISSON in a 2 minute gory mismatched brawl. THE HYPHEN-DASH overpowered ALASTARIAN DESERTER in a 1 minute one-sided match. BATTLE REPORT MOST POPULAR RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS |FIGHTING STYLE FIGHTS FIGHTING STYLE W - L - K PERCENT| |LUNGING ATTACK 6 STRIKING ATTACK 12 - 4 - 0 75 | |TOTAL PARRY 4 SLASHING ATTACK 16 - 7 - 2 70 | |PARRY-LUNGE 4 LUNGING ATTACK 38 - 20 - 0 66 | |STRIKING ATTACK 3 BASHING ATTACK 18 - 15 - 0 55 | |AIMED BLOW 3 PARRY-LUNGE 19 - 21 - 0 48 | |PARRY-RIPOSTE 3 PARRY-RIPOSTE 12 - 14 - 0 46 | |SLASHING ATTACK 3 WALL OF STEEL 13 - 18 - 1 42 | |WALL OF STEEL 3 AIMED BLOW 11 - 18 - 0 38 | |BASHING ATTACK 3 TOTAL PARRY 12 - 25 - 0 32 | |PARRY-STRIKE 0 PARRY-STRIKE 0 - 0 - 0 0 | Turn 15 was great if you Not so great if you used The fighting styles of the used the fighting styles: the fighting styles: top eleven warriors are: STRIKING ATTACK 3 - 0 BASHING ATTACK 1 - 2 3 LUNGING ATTACK AIMED BLOW 2 - 1 TOTAL PARRY 1 - 3 2 BASHING ATTACK PARRY-RIPOSTE 2 - 1 PARRY-LUNGE 0 - 4 2 PARRY-RIPOSTE SLASHING ATTACK 2 - 1 PARRY-STRIKE 0 - 0 1 STRIKING ATTACK WALL OF STEEL 2 - 1 1 SLASHING ATTACK LUNGING ATTACK 3 - 3 1 TOTAL PARRY 1 PARRY-LUNGE TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME STRIKING ATTACK MOIST TOWELETTE 42-4430 54 41 4 223 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) BASHING ATTACK DELAWARE RUN 42-4400 81 55 5 209 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) SLASHING ATTACK FROO-FROO 18-9589 45 32 4 205 CENTER FOR OLDS (364) LUNGING ATTACK DOMINATRIX 81-583 31 17 3 197 OF WOLF AND MAN (343) FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME PARRY-RIPOSTE EVANGELION 59-2340 24 19 1 187 IMPROVED ILLUSION (349) TOTAL PARRY GRATH 81-581 34 17 1 176 OF WOLF AND MAN (343) PARRY-LUNGE PLANKTON 18-9748 31 29 2 176 SEA DOGS (309) AIMED BLOW ZEVRAN 81-1258 26 30 1 165 OF WOLF AND MAN (343) WALL OF STEEL ALMOST PRETTY 42-4496 42 30 0 164 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) The overall popularity leader is SHINY PENNY 32-3789. The most popular warrior this turn was HEINRIK 81-1257. The ten other most popular fighters were DELAWARE RUN 42-4400, BEDDER 18-10043, DOMINATRIX 81-583, ZEVRAN 81-1258, AZAGHAL 81-1223, 1977 AMC MATADOR 42-4116, MOIST TOWELETTE 42-4430, THE BRIDE 45-4180, EVANGELION 59-2340, and PINCH BLISTER 18-9859. The least popular fighter this week was JELLO KNUCKLES 42-4554. The other ten least popular fighters were FAN ZHEN 81-1288, GAD 18-9239, ARIOCH 81-996, LAZY LOOKOUT 42-4504, TING-TING 81-776, PLANKTON 18-9748, FOUR OF SPADES 42-4234, SHINY PENNY 32-3789, THE HYPHEN-DASH 42-4499, and GRATH 81-581. Arena (Number) W L K Arena (Number) W L K Arena (Number) W L K BONSUR(7) 1 1 0 ARVAT(32) 0 1 0 ILLIS(59) 1 0 0 TALCAMA(18) 3 3 0 RODEKI(42) 5 3 0 DAL SHANG(65) 0 1 0 LAPUR(29) 2 0 0 STORMCROWE(45) 1 1 0 SHADOWSPIRE(81) 3 6 0 TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY OBROJOBO 7-5869 22 20 1 150 SENTINELS (354) BONSUR FROO-FROO 18-9589 45 32 4 205 CENTER FOR OLDS (364) TALCAMA RINDEL 29-5346 31 25 0 178 MID EARTH (316) LAPUR SHINY PENNY 32-3789 61 113 2 193 FOUND IN THE SAND (360) ARVAT MOIST TOWELETTE 42-4430 54 41 4 223 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) RODEKI THE BRIDE 45-4180 30 12 1 146 DARQUE FORCES (348) STORMCROWE EVANGELION 59-2340 24 19 1 187 IMPROVED ILLUSION (349) ILLIS VIRGINIA, NO SANTA 65-6623 26 18 1 119 GOT IT FOR CHRISTMAS (361) DAL SHANG DOMINATRIX 81-583 31 17 3 197 OF WOLF AND MAN (343) SHADOWSPIRE NEW GRADUATES--FROM ALL ARENAS (INCLUDING CLOSED ARENAS) For those of you who keep track of such things, several additional warriors graduated from regular DM arenas (including closed arenas) since the last tournament. AXIOM (11-3918) ERRATA (372) MACHETE MOUSE (82-4566) MAMMAL MILITIA (616) GONE TO GEORGIA (82-28596) STREET PIZZAD XXI (4657) ROOT (82-31537) 4 LETTER BEER (5196) SMOOTH (82-33235) TRANSITIONS (5487) YELLOW DEUCE COUPE (82-33317) COLOR TUNES (5502) ROOM 282 (82-33685) TEMPE -05 (5575) UGAMUGGAH (82-41228) STREET PIZZAD XXII (5040) TOUCHE' TURTLE (82-44789) KILLER KARTOONS (7535) MIDSIZE WHOOPER (82-47794) COOL NAMES 22 (8035) DAVID WAYBUR (84-5954) MEDAL OF HONOR F3 II (1124) RODEO CLOWN (84-11743) TOUGHER GUYS (2136) Congrats to the grads. -- Green Eyes