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Date   : 12/03/2013    Duedate: 12/16/2013

STORM ROCK ARENA

DM 107    TURN 62

RANK TEAMS                 W    L   K    %  RANK TEAMS                 W    L   K    % 
  1 COLOR ME SUA 42/365  315  211   2 59.9      SAND DANCERS 51/253
    CENTER FOR OLDS 18/364                      THE MOONDOGS 10/247
  2 VIKINGS 10/355        98  108   1 47.6      GOLDEN CANYON 26/254
    SENTINELS 7/354                             THE ILLUMINATI 37/46
    NOMADIC TRIBE 21/310                        BLOOD + ORANGES 51/47
    NONSUCH HOUSE 83/399                        CIRQUE DU MASQUES 58/251
    DRAGONBANE GUILD 81/334                     BLUVALLEY WARRIORS 46/255
  3 YAMA BUSHI 30/317     77   88   0 46.7      CHAN CHI MONASTERY 53/250
    CLAN LONGBEARD 81/374                       CHAN CHI MONASTERY 65/120
  4 BLUE MOON 9/249     1648 2163  21 43.2      CHAN CHI MONASTERY 2 65/122
    REFUGEES 65/151                             THE MAGNIFICENT MAGS 19/395
    REFORMERS 64/252                          5 END 13/298           117  163   1 41.8
    THE FAMILY 43/248                           SHEPHERDS 18/359
    SAND DANCERS 65/78                          ALASTARIAN IDOL 10/363
    SAND DANCERS 74/36                          FOUND IN THE SAND 32/360
    SAND DANCERS 75/37                          GOT IT FOR CHRISTMAS 65/361
    SAND DANCERS 76/38                        6 THE TAKEN 29/401       0    1   0  0.0
    SAND DANCERS 77/72                          HERO ALLIANCE 35/402
    SAND DANCERS 78/43                          SOUL WARRIORS 38/403
    SAND DANCERS 46/270

                             REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER

     Pardon me for the delay, I just got the estimate for fixing my roof, and I've
been in shock.  However, that makes it even more important that I hang onto this job!
So let's look at things.  First, we've had the Split, and that seems to have drawn
off some of our Old Reliables.  I'm glad for them that they've been doing so well,
but cheese louise!  They WILL be missed.
     Novgorodny Vir reports the following significant point movements, not that he
did the math himself.  It was the clerks in the Commission office who did the heavy
lifting.  Shiny Penny, up 31.  1977 AMC Matador, down 16.
     Apparently someone in this area has been "charging into immovable walls and
challenging dead trees."  Sounds like some kind of training regimen to me.
     No challenges.  Possibly Color Me Suave has been avoided, and if so, Dragonbane
Guild was doing it.
     "Like the wind whispering among the pines, do hearest I many disquieting
rumors."  Excuse me, is that the same language the rest of us speak?  And why didn't
he PASS ON TO US the "disquieting rumors"?  That is SOOO like Vir, putting on an air
of mysterious knowledge and not telling us anything so we can see how SHALLOW it is.
     We had ten fights, with no challenges and two standbys.  None of them were
action-packed, and none were exciting, and what does THAT say about us today?

     OZAWINDIB (7-6212) (27-21-0,94) of SENTINELS fought PUMA (35-2682) (18-12-0,82)
of HERO ALLIANCE.  OZAWINDIB overpowered PUMA in a 1 minute one-sided fight.  Ozy's
been here a while, but Puma's new.  One of you guys should show him around, where to
get a good drink, which barbers in the Infirmary to avoid, that kind of thing.  Make
him feel welcome.
     PINCH BLISTER (18-9859) (43-61-0,169) of CENTER FOR OLDS fought VIRGINIA, NO
SANTA (65-6623) (36-56-1,168) of GOT IT FOR CHRISTMAS.  PINCH BLISTER was narrowly
defeated by VIRGINIA, NO SANTA in a 5 minute fight.  Virginia is all wound up because
of the stress of remembering that there is no Santa.  Do NOT cross Virginia at this
time of year.
     THE HYPHEN-DASH (42-4499) (43-38-1,168) of COLOR ME SUAVE fought CRYSALIS GUARD
(107-29) (0-0-0,200) of Fine Imported Standbys.  THE HYPHEN-DASH was vanquished by
CRYSALIS GUARD in a 1 minute uneven fight.  I think we should send that Guard back to
Crysalis.  He's a foreigner and doesn't know our ways.
     CAJETAN (7-6036) (27-30-1,153) of SENTINELS fought RUTH (18-10121) (37-29-0,178)
of SHEPHERDS.  CAJETAN was handily defeated by RUTH in a 3 minute gruesome uneven
melee.  Not only handily defeated, but ruthlessly.
     ANZAHANZEK (7-6204) (29-19-0,181) of SENTINELS fought JELLO KNUCKLES (42-4554)
(49-43-0,159) of COLOR ME SUAVE.  ANZAHANZEK was savagely defeated by JELLO KNUCKLES
in a crowd pleasing 6 minute brawl.  Cherry jello, the crowd always likes that.

     AZAGHAL (81-1223) (41-39-1,182) of DRAGONBANE GUILD fought THE UPRIGHT MAN (10-
5185) (31-38-0,170) of ALASTARIAN IDOL.  AZAGHAL vanquished THE UPRIGHT MAN in a 1
minute mismatched fight.  That's what you get, The, going around posing as a dragon.
     MOIST TOWELETTE (42-4430) (94-47-4,192) of COLOR ME SUAVE fought POCKET NEWS
(19-5364) (25-18-0,203) of THE MAGNIFICENT MAGS.  MOIST TOWELETTE overpowered POCKET
NEWS in a crowd pleasing 1 minute mismatched match.  Ah, Moist really wiped of that
page!  Might want to change its name to Moist Eraser.
     1977 AMC MATADOR (42-4116) (66-54-0,192) of COLOR ME SUAVE fought CLOTTO (107-
25) (0-0-0,181) of Fine Imported Standbys.  1977 AMC MATADOR was vanquished by CLOTTO
in a popular 1 minute mismatched brawl.  And that makes the standbys two and oh.
     OBROJOBO (7-5869) (41-36-1,250) of SENTINELS fought HEINRIK (81-1257) (54-50-
1,191) of CLAN LONGBEARD.  OBROJOBO was devastated by HEINRIK in a 1 minute
mismatched fight.  That's got to be embarrassing.

For the title:
     ALMOST PRETTY (42-4496) (77-41-0,263) of COLOR ME SUAVE fought SHINY PENNY (32-
3789) (85-137-2,220) of FOUND IN THE SAND.  ALMOST PRETTY was vanquished by SHINY
PENNY in a 2 minute uneven Title battle.  Good try, Almost, and good work, Shiny.
Congratulations.

                                       Larkin

CHAMPION OF THE HORN           W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 SHINY PENNY 32-3789          86 137  2  251  FOUND IN THE SAND (360)    ARVAT

GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 MOIST TOWELETTE 42-4430      95  47  4  211  COLOR ME SUAVE (365)       RODEKI

GRAND CHAMPIONS                W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 HEINRIK 81-1257              55  50  1  210  CLAN LONGBEARD (374)       SHADOWSPIRE
-WALLI WEEBLE 21-6935         42  39     205  NOMADIC TRIBE (310)        SUNSET
 POCKET NEWS 19-5364          25  19     198  THE MAGNIFICENT MAGS (395) ZUWAYZA
 ALMOST PRETTY 42-4496        77  42     190  COLOR ME SUAVE (365)       RODEKI
 JELLO KNUCKLES 42-4554       50  43     183  COLOR ME SUAVE (365)       RODEKI
 RUTH 18-10121                38  29     182  SHEPHERDS (359)            TALCAMA

GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS        W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 VIRGINIA, NO SANTA 65-6623   37  56  1  177  GOT IT FOR CHRISTMAS (361) DAL SHANG
 1977 AMC MATADOR 42-4116     66  55     176  COLOR ME SUAVE (365)       RODEKI
 ANZAHANZEK 7-6204            29  20     170  SENTINELS (354)            BONSUR
 THE HYPHEN-DASH 42-4499      43  39  1  166  COLOR ME SUAVE (365)       RODEKI
 PINCH BLISTER 18-9859        43  62     166  CENTER FOR OLDS (364)      TALCAMA
 THE UPRIGHT MAN 10-5185      31  39     164  ALASTARIAN IDOL (363)      KOLACT
 CAJETAN 7-6036               27  31  1  152  SENTINELS (354)            BONSUR

GRAND ADEPTS                   W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 OZAWINDIB 7-6212             28  21     104  SENTINELS (354)            BONSUR

GRAND INITIATES                W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 PUMA 35-2682                 18  13      77  HERO ALLIANCE (402)        MURSKA
-ZANTOS 38-3000               17   6      55  SOUL WARRIORS (403)        CLIFFHOME

GRAND INITIATES                W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
-STEEL MUSE 83-287            15   6      51  NONSUCH HOUSE (399)        TELORINTHE

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                   W   L  K TEAM NAME              SLAIN BY                  TURN

                               PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE

Froo-Froo -- You're out of my price range. -- Shiny Penny

Darque -- You'll be missed.  Hope you're back soon.  I hope the Gad / Eva series was
as fun for you as it was for me.  If you want me to compile the final stats, let me
know. -- Assur

Josh & Gad are off to Primus to continue their training.  The plan at the moment is
to bring them back next split, but my plans could change between now and then.  In
the meantime, I've got a new grad coming in to replace them.  Welcome, Arugula, next
turn. -- Assur

Jello Knuckles -- You're just an appetizer. -- Ruth

Cajetan -- Those gym workouts have been paying big dividends for me.  No more
collapsing after one minute! -- Virginia
P.S.  We're now in my least favorite month of the year, when everything reminds me
that there is NO SANTA...

     Ah, but what about the Hogfather?

Most Challenged!  Everyone Trying to Get Close to Pocket News!

Anzahanzek Draws Attention at Commission Office with Confusing Name!  Steward
Annoyed!  Inside Story on page 10!

     Yes, well, the Steward says shouting out Anzahanzek's name always leaves him
     feeling like he's been stuttering.

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

OBROJOBO was devastated by HEINRIK in a 1 minute mismatched fight.
ALMOST PRETTY was vanquished by SHINY PENNY in a 2 minute uneven Title battle.
1977 AMC MATADOR was vanquished by CLOTTO in a popular 1 minute mismatched brawl.
MOIST TOWELETTE overpowered POCKET NEWS in a crowd pleasing 1 minute mismatched match.
AZAGHAL vanquished THE UPRIGHT MAN in a 1 minute mismatched fight.
ANZAHANZEK was savagely defeated by JELLO KNUCKLES in a crowd pleasing 6 minute brawl.
CAJETAN was handily defeated by RUTH in a 3 minute gruesome uneven melee.
THE HYPHEN-DASH was vanquished by CRYSALIS GUARD in a 1 minute uneven fight.
PINCH BLISTER was narrowly defeated by VIRGINIA, NO SANTA in a 5 minute fight.
OZAWINDIB overpowered PUMA in a 1 minute one-sided fight.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|BASHING ATTACK                   3         STRIKING ATTACK    9 -   2 -  0      82  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      3         SLASHING ATTACK   19 -   7 -  0      73  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    3         PARRY-LUNGE       17 -   9 -  0      65  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    2         WALL OF STEEL     22 -  17 -  2      56  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   2         LUNGING ATTACK    20 -  18 -  0      53  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  2         AIMED BLOW         6 -   6 -  0      50  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      1         PARRY-RIPOSTE     11 -  16 -  0      41  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     1         TOTAL PARRY       12 -  19 -  0      39  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  1         PARRY-STRIKE       3 -   5 -  0      38  |
|AIMED BLOW                       0         BASHING ATTACK     9 -  21 -  0      30  |

Turn  62 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-LUNGE        1 -  0     AIMED BLOW         0 -  0         3  WALL OF STEEL  
BASHING ATTACK     2 -  1     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  1         2  BASHING ATTACK 
TOTAL PARRY        2 -  1     SLASHING ATTACK    0 -  1         2  TOTAL PARRY    
PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -  1     WALL OF STEEL      0 -  3         1  STRIKING ATTACK
LUNGING ATTACK     1 -  1                                       1  LUNGING ATTACK 
STRIKING ATTACK    1 -  1                                       1  PARRY-RIPOSTE  
                                                                1  PARRY-STRIKE   

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
BASHING ATTACK   SHINY PENNY 32-3789        86 137  2  251 FOUND IN THE SAND (360)
STRIKING ATTACK  MOIST TOWELETTE 42-4430    95  47  4  211 COLOR ME SUAVE (365)
LUNGING ATTACK   HEINRIK 81-1257            55  50  1  210 CLAN LONGBEARD (374)
WALL OF STEEL    POCKET NEWS 19-5364        25  19  0  198 THE MAGNIFICENT MAGS (395)
TOTAL PARRY      JELLO KNUCKLES 42-4554     50  43  0  183 COLOR ME SUAVE (365)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    RUTH 18-10121              38  29  0  182 SHEPHERDS (359)
PARRY-STRIKE     ANZAHANZEK 7-6204          29  20  0  170 SENTINELS (354)

The overall popularity leader is SHINY PENNY 32-3789.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was VIRGINIA, NO SANTA 65-6623.  The ten other most popular fighters were PINCH 
BLISTER 18-9859, ANZAHANZEK 7-6204, JELLO KNUCKLES 42-4554, SHINY PENNY 32-3789, 
MOIST TOWELETTE 42-4430, HEINRIK 81-1257, AZAGHAL 81-1223, CAJETAN 7-6036, ALMOST 
PRETTY 42-4496, and THE HYPHEN-DASH 42-4499.

The least popular fighter this week was PUMA 35-2682.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were THE UPRIGHT MAN 10-5185, OBROJOBO 7-5869, RUTH 18-10121, POCKET NEWS 
19-5364, 1977 AMC MATADOR 42-4116, OZAWINDIB 7-6212, THE HYPHEN-DASH 42-4499, ALMOST 
PRETTY 42-4496, CAJETAN 7-6036, and AZAGHAL 81-1223.

Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  
BONSUR(7)            1  3 0  ZUWAYZA(19)          0  1 0  RODEKI(42)           2  3 0  
KOLACT(10)           0  1 0  ARVAT(32)            1  0 0  DAL SHANG(65)        1  0 0  
TALCAMA(18)          1  1 0  MURSKA(35)           0  1 0  SHADOWSPIRE(81)      2  0 0  

TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 ANZAHANZEK 7-6204           29  20  0  170  SENTINELS (354)            BONSUR
 THE UPRIGHT MAN 10-5185     31  39  0  164  ALASTARIAN IDOL (363)      KOLACT
 RUTH 18-10121               38  29  0  182  SHEPHERDS (359)            TALCAMA
 POCKET NEWS 19-5364         25  19  0  198  THE MAGNIFICENT MAGS (395) ZUWAYZA
 SHINY PENNY 32-3789         86 137  2  251  FOUND IN THE SAND (360)    ARVAT
 PUMA 35-2682                18  13  0   77  HERO ALLIANCE (402)        MURSKA
 MOIST TOWELETTE 42-4430     95  47  4  211  COLOR ME SUAVE (365)       RODEKI
 VIRGINIA, NO SANTA 65-6623  37  56  1  177  GOT IT FOR CHRISTMAS (361) DAL SHANG
 HEINRIK 81-1257             55  50  1  210  CLAN LONGBEARD (374)       SHADOWSPIRE