AD

Date   : 01/28/2014    Duedate: 02/10/2014

STORM ROCK ARENA

DM 107    TURN 66

RANK TEAMS                 W    L   K    %  RANK TEAMS                 W    L   K    % 
  1 COLOR ME SUA 42/365  327  223   2 59.5      SAND DANCERS 51/253
    CENTER FOR OLDS 18/364                      THE MOONDOGS 10/247
  2 YAMA BUSHI 30/317     81   88   0 47.9      GOLDEN CANYON 26/254
    CLAN LONGBEARD 81/374                       THE ILLUMINATI 37/46
  3 VIKINGS 10/355       106  118   1 47.3      BLOOD + ORANGES 51/47
    SENTINELS 7/354                             CIRQUE DU MASQUES 58/251
    DRAGONBANE GUILD 81/334                     BLUVALLEY WARRIORS 46/255
  4 BLUE MOON 9/249     1649 2166  21 43.2      CHAN CHI MONASTERY 53/250
    REFUGEES 65/151                             CHAN CHI MONASTERY 65/120
    REFORMERS 64/252                            CHAN CHI MONASTERY 2 65/122
    THE FAMILY 43/248                           THE MAGNIFICENT MAGS 19/395
    SAND DANCERS 65/78                        5 END 13/298           126  174   1 42.0
    SAND DANCERS 74/36                          VEGGIES 3/372
    SAND DANCERS 75/37                          SHEPHERDS 18/359
    SAND DANCERS 76/38                          ALASTARIAN IDOL 10/363
    SAND DANCERS 77/72                          FOUND IN THE SAND 32/360
    SAND DANCERS 78/43                          GOT IT FOR CHRISTMAS 65/361
    SAND DANCERS 46/270                       6-SOUL WARRIOR 38/403    1    1   0 50.0

                             REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER

     "Like the magnificent Sun, rising upon the Dawn and exiling the Night for a Day,
I, Novgorodny Vir, return once again!"  Not lacking in the ego department, Vir.
"FOUND IN THE SAND had cause to celebrate, after SHINY PENNY got 22 points by beating
THE HYPHEN-DASH.  Win some, lose some.  Speaking of which, SHINY PENNY was winsome,
after beating THE HYPHEN-DASH and seeing it lose 23 points.  Those who hoped for a
new Duelmaster were disappointed by AZAGHAL, of DRAGONBANE GUILD, who despite a 45-
40-1 couldn't overcome STORM ROCK's Number 1.  Word has it one team in STORM ROCK is
using psychics to predict wins.  They lead a charmed life!"  I'm not getting this
about the psychics.  So they PREDICT wins.  That means you know in advance, not that
you're trying to influence stuff, right?
     "And how sociable are STORM ROCK's warriors?"  Not at all.  "Come, let us see.
To quell some nasty rumors, the guys in COLOR ME SUAVE are not carrying any incurable
diseases.  No need to avoid 'em.  Like a pup with its tail between its legs,
SENTINELS scurried away from COLOR ME SUAVE.  Oh, the shame!"  It wouldn't be a shame
if it happened, just a piece of good management, but I checked the record and there
was only one avoid issued.  This is hardly worth commenting on.  But Vir has his set
form, and he hates to deviate from it.  If there had been NO avoids, he still would
have found someone to accuse.
     "Is there life after death?  Pragmatics (and warriors) know there is death after
life!  Oh hard! that to strike a flame, the match itself must needs be wasting!"
More fuzzy thinking.  The match would be fulfilling its function, which is the whole
deal.
     "Do not think spy reporting in STORM ROCK is the highlight of my life."  
Although it IS.  "As the seasons change, and the creatures of the wild change also,
so do I feel a yearning to leave this place."  I'm not getting this.  Does Vir think
he's a creature of the wild?  As if!  "STORM ROCK, I leave you now.  The Duelmaster
has agreed to foot my bill at The Warty Toad."  It wasn't the Warty Toad, but I saw
him "foot" the bill.  Trampled it under his foot.  Doesn't matter, the bills all go
to the Commission office anyway.

Nine fights, no challenges, one avoid, one standby.  Without further ado, the fights:
     OZAWINDIB (7-6212) (31-21-0,127) of SENTINELS fought ARUGULA (3-7180) (25-22-
2,100) of VEGGIES.  OZAWINDIB won victory over ARUGULA in a popular 3 minute fight.
Chili powder on the veggie?  Not what I'd choose, but if it works....
     JELLO KNUCKLES (42-4554) (51-45-0,175) of COLOR ME SUAVE fought IMPRISONED SPY
(107-9) (0-0-0,170) of Fine Imported Standbys.  JELLO KNUCKLES was viciously subdued
by IMPRISONED SPY in a popular 2 minute duel.  Oops!
     OBROJOBO (7-5869) (41-40-1,179) of SENTINELS fought 1977 AMC MATADOR (42-4116)
(66-58-0,171) of COLOR ME SUAVE.  OBROJOBO was overcome by 1977 AMC MATADOR in an
action packed 2 minute melee.  An interesting turn of invective Matador's got.
     PINCH BLISTER (18-9859) (44-64-0,182) of CENTER FOR OLDS fought THE UPRIGHT MAN
(10-5185) (33-40-0,161) of ALASTARIAN IDOL.  PINCH BLISTER overpowered THE UPRIGHT
MAN in a popular 1 minute mismatched brawl.  The Man is now NOT upright.  It'll pass.

     ANZAHANZEK (7-6204) (30-22-0,192) of SENTINELS fought RUTH (18-10121) (41-29-
0,205) of SHEPHERDS.  ANZAHANZEK was viciously subdued by RUTH in a popular 14 minute
bloody duel.  If I read the scrawled note correctly, Anzahanzek avoided Color Me
Suave ino order to enter this fight.
     ALMOST PRETTY (42-4496) (79-43-0,192) of COLOR ME SUAVE fought POCKET NEWS (19-
5364) (26-21-0,199) of THE MAGNIFICENT MAGS.  ALMOST PRETTY savagely defeated POCKET
NEWS in an exciting 3 minute bloody fight.  I look forward to hearing how THIS is
reported in the News.
     MOIST TOWELETTE (42-4430) (97-48-4,199) of COLOR ME SUAVE fought VIRGINIA, NO
SANTA (65-6623) (38-58-1,180) of GOT IT FOR CHRISTMAS.  MOIST TOWELETTE vanquished
VIRGINIA, NO SANTA in a 1 minute mismatched brawl.  Cleaning up, eh, Moist?
     SHINY PENNY (32-3789) (87-139-2,183) of FOUND IN THE SAND fought THE HYPHEN-DASH
(42-4499) (45-40-1,204) of COLOR ME SUAVE.  SHINY PENNY handily defeated THE HYPHEN-
DASH in a 1 minute one-sided match.  This is the fight that impressed Vir.

For the title:
     HEINRIK (81-1257) (58-50-1,285) of CLAN LONGBEARD fought AZAGHAL (81-1223) (45-
39-1,221) of DRAGONBANE GUILD.  HEINRIK devastated AZAGHAL in an action packed 1
minute brutal mismatched Title fight.  Congratulations to Heinrik once again.

                                       Larkin

CHAMPION OF THE HORN           W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 HEINRIK 81-1257              59  50  1  299  CLAN LONGBEARD (374)       SHADOWSPIRE

GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 RUTH 18-10121                42  29     213  SHEPHERDS (359)            TALCAMA

GRAND CHAMPIONS                W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 ALMOST PRETTY 42-4496        80  43     207  COLOR ME SUAVE (365)       RODEKI
 SHINY PENNY 32-3789          88 139  2  205  FOUND IN THE SAND (360)    ARVAT
 MOIST TOWELETTE 42-4430      98  48  4  204  COLOR ME SUAVE (365)       RODEKI
 POCKET NEWS 19-5364          26  22     200  THE MAGNIFICENT MAGS (395) ZUWAYZA
 ANZAHANZEK 7-6204            30  23     195  SENTINELS (354)            BONSUR
 AZAGHAL 81-1223              45  40  1  192  DRAGONBANE GUILD (334)     SHADOWSPIRE
 PINCH BLISTER 18-9859        45  64     188  CENTER FOR OLDS (364)      TALCAMA
 1977 AMC MATADOR 42-4116     67  58     182  COLOR ME SUAVE (365)       RODEKI
 THE HYPHEN-DASH 42-4499      45  41  1  181  COLOR ME SUAVE (365)       RODEKI

GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS        W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 VIRGINIA, NO SANTA 65-6623   38  59  1  180  GOT IT FOR CHRISTMAS (361) DAL SHANG
 OBROJOBO 7-5869              41  41  1  175  SENTINELS (354)            BONSUR
 JELLO KNUCKLES 42-4554       51  46     167  COLOR ME SUAVE (365)       RODEKI
 THE UPRIGHT MAN 10-5185      33  41     156  ALASTARIAN IDOL (363)      KOLACT

GRAND ADEPTS                   W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
-CAJETAN 7-6036               27  33  1  150  SENTINELS (354)            BONSUR

GRAND ADEPTS                   W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 OZAWINDIB 7-6212             32  21     129  SENTINELS (354)            BONSUR

GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 ARUGULA 3-7180               25  23  2  100  VEGGIES (372)              OSKSI

GRAND INITIATES                W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
-MAULI LAMA 7-6292            15  12  1   58  SENTINELS (354)            BONSUR
-ZANTOS 38-3000               18   6      57  SOUL WARRIORS (403)        CLIFFHOME

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                   W   L  K TEAM NAME              SLAIN BY                  TURN

                               PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE

Reckless Driving!  Attempted Vehicular Homicide Foiled!  Story on page 10.

No Hidden Treasure!  Spy Reporter Mistaken!

Larkin -- I hold YOU personally responsible for the damage to my guildhouse!  Your
provocative and misleading statement in last cycle's newsletter has resulted in
people ripping up the floorboards and burrowing under the foundation in an effort to
find the "hidden treasure" which you stated "must be there."  You will hear from my
lawyer shortly. -- Pocket News

     That'll make my day.  I'll get ME a lawyer from Bash Bros.

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

HEINRIK devastated AZAGHAL in a action packed 1 minute brutal mismatched Title fight.
SHINY PENNY handily defeated THE HYPHEN-DASH in a 1 minute one-sided match.
MOIST TOWELETTE vanquished VIRGINIA, NO SANTA in a 1 minute mismatched brawl.
ALMOST PRETTY savagely defeated POCKET NEWS in a exciting 3 minute bloody fight.
ANZAHANZEK was viciously subdued by RUTH in a popular 14 minute bloody duel.
PINCH BLISTER overpowered THE UPRIGHT MAN in a popular 1 minute mismatched brawl.
OBROJOBO was overcome by 1977 AMC MATADOR in a action packed 2 minute melee.
JELLO KNUCKLES was viciously subdued by IMPRISONED SPY in a popular 2 minute duel.
OZAWINDIB won victory over ARUGULA in a popular 3 minute fight.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|TOTAL PARRY                      3         AIMED BLOW         4 -   1 -  0      80  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    3         STRIKING ATTACK    8 -   3 -  0      73  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   3         SLASHING ATTACK   12 -   8 -  0      60  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   2         PARRY-LUNGE       14 -  10 -  0      58  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      2         LUNGING ATTACK    16 -  14 -  0      53  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    1         WALL OF STEEL     18 -  17 -  1      51  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  1         TOTAL PARRY       16 -  19 -  0      46  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     1         PARRY-RIPOSTE     10 -  13 -  0      43  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  1         BASHING ATTACK    12 -  18 -  0      40  |
|AIMED BLOW                       0         PARRY-STRIKE       3 -   7 -  0      30  |

Turn  66 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -  0     BASHING ATTACK     1 -  2         3  WALL OF STEEL  
STRIKING ATTACK    1 -  0     AIMED BLOW         0 -  0         2  LUNGING ATTACK 
TOTAL PARRY        2 -  1     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  2         1  PARRY-RIPOSTE  
WALL OF STEEL      2 -  1     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  1         1  BASHING ATTACK 
LUNGING ATTACK     1 -  1     SLASHING ATTACK    0 -  1         1  STRIKING ATTACK
                                                                1  PARRY-STRIKE   
                                                                1  PARRY-LUNGE    
                                                                1  TOTAL PARRY    

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
LUNGING ATTACK   HEINRIK 81-1257            59  50  1  299 CLAN LONGBEARD (374)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    RUTH 18-10121              42  29  0  213 SHEPHERDS (359)
WALL OF STEEL    ALMOST PRETTY 42-4496      80  43  0  207 COLOR ME SUAVE (365)
BASHING ATTACK   SHINY PENNY 32-3789        88 139  2  205 FOUND IN THE SAND (360)
STRIKING ATTACK  MOIST TOWELETTE 42-4430    98  48  4  204 COLOR ME SUAVE (365)
PARRY-STRIKE     ANZAHANZEK 7-6204          30  23  0  195 SENTINELS (354)
PARRY-LUNGE      AZAGHAL 81-1223            45  40  1  192 DRAGONBANE GUILD (334)
TOTAL PARRY      PINCH BLISTER 18-9859      45  64  0  188 CENTER FOR OLDS (364)
SLASHING ATTACK  OBROJOBO 7-5869            41  41  1  175 SENTINELS (354)

The overall popularity leader is SHINY PENNY 32-3789.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was ANZAHANZEK 7-6204.  The ten other most popular fighters were ALMOST PRETTY 
42-4496, OBROJOBO 7-5869, ARUGULA 3-7180, OZAWINDIB 7-6212, HEINRIK 81-1257, POCKET 
NEWS 19-5364, 1977 AMC MATADOR 42-4116, RUTH 18-10121, PINCH BLISTER 18-9859, and 
SHINY PENNY 32-3789.

The least popular fighter this week was JELLO KNUCKLES 42-4554.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were VIRGINIA, NO SANTA 65-6623, THE HYPHEN-DASH 42-4499, AZAGHAL 
81-1223, THE UPRIGHT MAN 10-5185, MOIST TOWELETTE 42-4430, SHINY PENNY 32-3789, PINCH 
BLISTER 18-9859, RUTH 18-10121, 1977 AMC MATADOR 42-4116, and POCKET NEWS 19-5364.

Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  
OSKSI(3)             0  1 0  TALCAMA(18)          2  0 0  RODEKI(42)           3  2 0  
BONSUR(7)            1  2 0  ZUWAYZA(19)          0  1 0  DAL SHANG(65)        0  1 0  
KOLACT(10)           0  1 0  ARVAT(32)            1  0 0  SHADOWSPIRE(81)      1  1 0  

TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 ARUGULA 3-7180              25  23  2  100  VEGGIES (372)              OSKSI
 ANZAHANZEK 7-6204           30  23  0  195  SENTINELS (354)            BONSUR
 THE UPRIGHT MAN 10-5185     33  41  0  156  ALASTARIAN IDOL (363)      KOLACT
 RUTH 18-10121               42  29  0  213  SHEPHERDS (359)            TALCAMA
 POCKET NEWS 19-5364         26  22  0  200  THE MAGNIFICENT MAGS (395) ZUWAYZA
 SHINY PENNY 32-3789         88 139  2  205  FOUND IN THE SAND (360)    ARVAT
 ALMOST PRETTY 42-4496       80  43  0  207  COLOR ME SUAVE (365)       RODEKI
 VIRGINIA, NO SANTA 65-6623  38  59  1  180  GOT IT FOR CHRISTMAS (361) DAL SHANG
 HEINRIK 81-1257             59  50  1  299  CLAN LONGBEARD (374)       SHADOWSPIRE