AD
Date : 05/02/2017 Duedate: 05/15/2017
STORM ROCK ARENA
DM 107 TURN 148
RANK TEAMS W L K % RANK TEAMS W L K %
1 HOYT FOUNDATI 8/427 65 43 2 60.2 CENTER FOR OLDS 18/364
BIG LAKE BANDITS 33/409 3 RHYME TYME 55/385 378 317 3 54.4
BIG LAKE OUTCASTS 81/410 4 BASHAHOLICS 59/375 284 353 6 44.6
2 COLOR ME SUA 42/365 615 446 2 58.0 BASH BROS CHILDREN 38/407
THE GUARDIAN'S FORUM
Reflections by the Champion of the Horn
Storm Rock
Thee I mock.
And you, Almost Pretty,
You wish you were like me.
I poked a hole in your belly
You were bloody
Ew.
I rock.
-- Mod Cod
REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER
Salutations, fierce defenders of Storm Rock!
There were ten fights today, half of them involving a stand-in, so a mere fifteen
gladiators participated. It almost makes me weep, that a noble institution such as
Storm Rock Arena would have so few adherents. Still, the fights that did happen were
extraordinary displayes of courage and prowess.
As usual, the Big Lake guild did all of the challenging. This time, all three
challengers won, which is a nice change! Members of the Suave guild were challenged,
not surprisingly since they tend to be the worthiest opponents. Other than those
fights, the Suave guild fought four stand-ins, defeating two of them, a worthy
achievement.
SYE THE BEARDED (81-801) (37-20-1,171) of BIG LAKE OUTCASTS challenged HARD
KNOCKS (42-4555) (31-29-0,166) of COLOR ME SUAVE. SYE THE BEARDED devastated HARD
KNOCKS in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge fight. Hard Knocks is our most feared Aimed
Blow, and yet it did not help him.
BURM WOLFSNARL (81-113) (40-22-0,173) of BIG LAKE OUTCASTS challenged TANTRUM
YOGA (42-4563) (34-27-2,147) of COLOR ME SUAVE. BURM WOLFSNARL subdued TANTRUM YOGA
in an exciting 2 minute Challenge melee. Tantrum Yoga is Storm Rock's most highly
respected Parry-Lunge.
INIGO MONTOYA (33-8054) (33-25-2,123) of BIG LAKE BANDITS challenged CHATROOMMATE
(18-10034) (35-32-0,154) of CENTER FOR OLDS. INIGO MONTOYA overpowered CHATROOMMATE
in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge duel. Inigo Montoya is the arena's top Slasher.
MOD COD (55-2638) (273-188-4,320) of RHYME TYME fought JELLO KNUCKLES (42-4554)
(93-85-0,216) of COLOR ME SUAVE. MOD COD devastated JELLO KNUCKLES in a 1 minute one-
sided Title fight. Mod Cod is our most fearsome Lunger, while Jello Knuckles is the
premier Total Parry. And of course, Mod Cod is still the Champion of the Horn. By
the way, Mod Cod, I did not thank you for your column last turn. Thank you! It was
clever and entertaining. Perhaps that is why you are still the overall popularity
leader.
THE HYPHEN-DASH (42-4499) (86-80-1,268) of COLOR ME SUAVE fought VERMICIOUS KNID
(107-30) (0-0-0,240) of . THE HYPHEN-DASH savagely defeated VERMICIOUS KNID in a 3
minute competition.
BEDDER (18-10043) (61-101-3,202) of CENTER FOR OLDS fought CRYSALIS GUARD (107-
29) (0-0-0,200) of . BEDDER was defeated by CRYSALIS GUARD in a 2 minute struggle.
Bedder is our most highly celebrated Striker.
1977 AMC MATADOR (42-4116) (118-88-0,198) of COLOR ME SUAVE fought AMBER
WOLFWALKER (107-11) (0-0-0,220) of . 1977 AMC MATADOR was overpowered by AMBER
WOLFWALKER in a 2 minute mismatched brawl.
ALMOST PRETTY (42-4496) (134-71-0,210) of COLOR ME SUAVE fought CLOTTO (107-25)
(0-0-0,181) of . ALMOST PRETTY vanquished CLOTTO in an action packed 3 minute gory
uneven duel. Almost Pretty is the best Wall of Steel, and definitely pretty. She was
voted this turn's favorite fighter.
I'M POWERLESS (59-2629) (32-60-0,19) of BASHAHOLICS ANON fought THE ANXIOUS MAN
(8-5589) (18-13-1,68) of HOYT FOUNDATION. I'M POWERLESS vanquished THE ANXIOUS MAN in
a 1 minute one-sided duel. I'm powerless is, of course, our top-ranked Basher. Oddly
for a Basher, I'm Powerless has not filled out the gender portion of the Commission's
enrollment form.
DIRTY DIAPERS (38-5071) (35-49-2,45) of BASH BROS CHILDREN fought RIRORNI SOLDIER
(107-3) (0-0-0,30) of . DIRTY DIAPERS savagely defeated RIRORNI SOLDIER in an action
packed 2 minute match.
And that, my brave ones, is the entirety of my report this turn. Be well until
next time!
-- Adonis tel Edekin Kalaniah the Ever-Prepared
CHAMPION OF THE HORN W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
MOD COD 55-2638 274 188 4 335 RHYME TYME (385) KHALANI
GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
THE HYPHEN-DASH 42-4499 87 80 1 276 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) RODEKI
ALMOST PRETTY 42-4496 135 71 0 218 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) RODEKI
GRAND CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
JELLO KNUCKLES 42-4554 93 86 0 210 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) RODEKI
BEDDER 18-10043 61 102 3 196 CENTER FOR OLDS (364) TALCAMA
1977 AMC MATADOR 42-4116 118 89 0 190 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) RODEKI
SYE THE BEARDED 81-801 38 20 1 182 BIG LAKE OUTCASTS (410) SHADOWSPIRE
GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
BURM WOLFSNARL 81-113 41 22 0 176 BIG LAKE OUTCASTS (410) SHADOWSPIRE
HARD KNOCKS 42-4555 31 30 0 163 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) RODEKI
INIGO MONTOYA 33-8054 34 25 2 151 BIG LAKE BANDITS (409) NIATOLI ISLAND
GRAND ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
TANTRUM YOGA 42-4563 34 28 2 150 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) RODEKI
CHATROOMMATE 18-10034 35 33 0 130 CENTER FOR OLDS (364) TALCAMA
GRAND INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
-MADAME HYDRA 45-4752 18 7 1 62 DARQUE FORCES (348) STORMCROWE
I'M POWERLESS 59-2629 33 60 0 58 BASHAHOLICS ANON (375) ILLIS
-PROF. MONKEYPANTS 20-409 14 11 1 54 I'M NOT EGGBERT (421) SEAM
DIRTY DIAPERS 38-5071 36 49 2 49 BASH BROS CHILDREN (407) CLIFFHOME
THE ANXIOUS MAN 8-5589 18 14 1 33 HOYT FOUNDATION (427) ARKERS
'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.
THE DEAD W L K TEAM NAME SLAIN BY TURN
PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE
LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS
SYE THE BEARDED devastated HARD KNOCKS in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge fight.
BURM WOLFSNARL subdued TANTRUM YOGA in a exciting 2 minute Challenge melee.
INIGO MONTOYA overpowered CHATROOMMATE in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge duel.
MOD COD devastated JELLO KNUCKLES in a 1 minute one-sided Title fight.
THE HYPHEN-DASH savagely defeated VERMICIOUS KNID in a 3 minute competition.
BEDDER was defeated by CRYSALIS GUARD in a 2 minute struggle.
1977 AMC MATADOR was overpowered by AMBER WOLFWALKER in a 2 minute mismatched brawl.
ALMOST PRETTY vanquished CLOTTO in a action packed 3 minute gory uneven duel.
I'M POWERLESS vanquished THE ANXIOUS MAN in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
DIRTY DIAPERS savagely defeated RIRORNI SOLDIER in a action packed 2 minute match.
BATTLE REPORT
MOST POPULAR RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS
|FIGHTING STYLE FIGHTS FIGHTING STYLE W - L - K PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK 2 LUNGING ATTACK 18 - 2 - 0 90 |
|BASHING ATTACK 2 TOTAL PARRY 13 - 5 - 0 72 |
|SLASHING ATTACK 2 WALL OF STEEL 13 - 7 - 0 65 |
|STRIKING ATTACK 2 STRIKING ATTACK 9 - 9 - 0 50 |
|TOTAL PARRY 2 BASHING ATTACK 9 - 11 - 1 45 |
|WALL OF STEEL 2 AIMED BLOW 4 - 6 - 0 40 |
|PARRY-LUNGE 2 SLASHING ATTACK 4 - 7 - 0 36 |
|AIMED BLOW 1 PARRY-LUNGE 6 - 14 - 0 30 |
|PARRY-STRIKE 0 PARRY-STRIKE 0 - 2 - 0 0 |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 - 0 - 0 0 |
Turn 148 was great if you Not so great if you used The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles: the fighting styles: top eleven warriors are:
LUNGING ATTACK 2 - 0 AIMED BLOW 0 - 1 2 LUNGING ATTACK
BASHING ATTACK 2 - 0 PARRY-LUNGE 0 - 2 2 WALL OF STEEL
SLASHING ATTACK 1 - 1 PARRY-STRIKE 0 - 0 2 TOTAL PARRY
STRIKING ATTACK 1 - 1 PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 - 0 2 STRIKING ATTACK
TOTAL PARRY 1 - 1 1 AIMED BLOW
WALL OF STEEL 1 - 1 1 SLASHING ATTACK
1 PARRY-LUNGE
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE
FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME
LUNGING ATTACK MOD COD 55-2638 274 188 4 335 RHYME TYME (385)
WALL OF STEEL ALMOST PRETTY 42-4496 135 71 0 218 COLOR ME SUAVE (365)
TOTAL PARRY JELLO KNUCKLES 42-4554 93 86 0 210 COLOR ME SUAVE (365)
STRIKING ATTACK BEDDER 18-10043 61 102 3 196 CENTER FOR OLDS (364)
AIMED BLOW HARD KNOCKS 42-4555 31 30 0 163 COLOR ME SUAVE (365)
SLASHING ATTACK INIGO MONTOYA 33-8054 34 25 2 151 BIG LAKE BANDITS (409)
PARRY-LUNGE TANTRUM YOGA 42-4563 34 28 2 150 COLOR ME SUAVE (365)
BASHING ATTACK I'M POWERLESS 59-2629 33 60 0 58 BASHAHOLICS ANON (375)
The overall popularity leader is MOD COD 55-2638. The most popular warrior this turn
was ALMOST PRETTY 42-4496. The ten other most popular fighters were THE HYPHEN-DASH
42-4499, DIRTY DIAPERS 38-5071, BURM WOLFSNARL 81-113, TANTRUM YOGA 42-4563, SYE THE
BEARDED 81-801, HARD KNOCKS 42-4555, MOD COD 55-2638, BEDDER 18-10043, 1977 AMC
MATADOR 42-4116, and I'M POWERLESS 59-2629.
The least popular fighter this week was THE ANXIOUS MAN 8-5589. The other ten least
popular fighters were JELLO KNUCKLES 42-4554, CHATROOMMATE 18-10034, INIGO MONTOYA
33-8054, I'M POWERLESS 59-2629, 1977 AMC MATADOR 42-4116, BEDDER 18-10043, MOD COD
55-2638, HARD KNOCKS 42-4555, SYE THE BEARDED 81-801, and TANTRUM YOGA 42-4563.
Arena (Number) W L K Arena (Number) W L K Arena (Number) W L K
ARKERS(8) 0 1 0 CLIFFHOME(38) 1 0 0 ILLIS(59) 1 0 0
TALCAMA(18) 0 2 0 RODEKI(42) 2 4 0 SHADOWSPIRE(81) 2 0 0
NIATOLI ISLAND(33) 1 0 0 KHALANI(55) 1 0 0
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
THE ANXIOUS MAN 8-5589 18 14 1 33 HOYT FOUNDATION (427) ARKERS
BEDDER 18-10043 61 102 3 196 CENTER FOR OLDS (364) TALCAMA
INIGO MONTOYA 33-8054 34 25 2 151 BIG LAKE BANDITS (409) NIATOLI ISLAND
DIRTY DIAPERS 38-5071 36 49 2 49 BASH BROS CHILDREN (407) CLIFFHOME
THE HYPHEN-DASH 42-4499 87 80 1 276 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) RODEKI
MOD COD 55-2638 274 188 4 335 RHYME TYME (385) KHALANI
I'M POWERLESS 59-2629 33 60 0 58 BASHAHOLICS ANON (375) ILLIS
SYE THE BEARDED 81-801 38 20 1 182 BIG LAKE OUTCASTS (410) SHADOWSPIRE
PAYMENTS BY CHECK AND MONEY ORDER -- CHANGE
Please note that because of new bank regulations, we can no longer accept any check or
money order drawn off a non-US bank, even if it is in US Funds. We were just informed
by our bank that the fee to process these checks is $40, which is crazy high!
Many apologies to our foreign players, but you will need to either get a check from a
US bank (Chase, Citigroup, etc.) or pay via credit card.