AD
Date : 02/04/2020 Duedate: 02/17/2020
STORM ROCK ARENA
DM 107 TURN 220
RANK TEAMS W L K % RANK TEAMS W L K %
1 COLOR ME SUA 42/365 963 663 5 59.2 4 BASH BROS TI 72/411 118 211 5 35.9
CENTER FOR OLDS 18/364 BASHAHOLICS ANON 59/375
2 RHYME TYME 55/385 65 19 1 77.4 BASH BROS CHILDREN 38/407
3 BIG LAKE PUR 28/437 211 233 6 47.5 5 DEADLINE 20/432 24 42 1 36.4
BIG LAKE BANDITS 33/409 6 CON + INSULT 32/442 31 58 1 34.8
BIG LAKE OUTCASTS 81/410 HOUSE JHEREG 35/426
BIG LAKE SOLUTION 81/439 I'M NOT EGGBERT 20/421
WARRIOR SPOTLIGHT
Dark Stoicism
The giant sword cut a furrow into the dirt. The night's light reflected from a few
patches on its slowly rusting blade, which rose out through an upturned mouth. The
ricasso head stretched past a crossguard of outstretched hands. The stylized fighter
handle stood on a pommel skull. Two beefy hands grasped the figure's body. The sword
was massive, like the warrior holding it, called Stoic. The sword was sleek and
battle-worn, the warrior was bloated and uncertain. Towering though he was, even under
plates of armor, fat rolls peeked out. One might wonder if the cook decided to go to
war while the soldiers stayed in the kitchen.
Stoic looked back. His manager, memory, had been there just a moment ago, but the tree
line had misted over, obscuring the entrance. He shrugged under the weight of the
armor and looked through his helmet. The moonlight was bright on a clearing in the
forest. All was deadly quiet, night mist roiling. His sollrets clunking through patchy
grass occasionally broke the silence. It would be serene, but he could feel eyes
everywhere and the promise of death. This was not a quiet forest and certainly not the
boisterous and sandy arena he normally fought in. This was the Dark Arena, final
resting spot of the failed gladiator.
* * *
"I can do better. I can! Please!" Stoic pleaded but memory was unmoved. "My decision
is final. You don't have the desire to live a life of war. You have not grown into the
gladiator name I gave you." Stoic was on his knees, begging, searching memory's
unseeing eyes for hope. Memory's mouth tightened as he let out an almost imperceptible
sigh. He pulled the hood of his tight black cloak over his head, turned, and drifted
away.
"Wyvern, please. Surely you can save me?" The trainer put a hand on his shoulder. With
Stoic on his knees, he and the diminutive trainer were eye to eye. An immortal warrior
with many years and many deaths behind her, she did not harbor his fear of the
unknown. "Today's fight is over. Tomorrow we will train for the next." She locked eyes
with him, passing on some of her inner resolve. "Come," she bade, as she led him from
the infirmary back to their training hall.
* * *
A biting pain seared through an exposed flap of skin on his stomach. His mind had
wandered away from the fight. His opponent, a Dark Arena champion, had entered
silently. An elf stood before him, two feet shorter, but standing tall and towering
above Stoic by confidence and bearing if not physical height. He might have been a
glimmering angel, moonbeams dancing on exquisite silver mail. The elf brought his
needle-thin sword up, hilt to face, blade skyward, in honorable warrior salute. He was
sure he had won, and everyone knew it. He had time to honor the walking dead.
* * *
Old Wyvern snaked a short spear under his guard, stopping just short of cutting. She
always used her deadly spear, even in training, such was her skill and control. He had
a greatsword, blunted for training, but massive. "I can barely move it. How can I
train or fight if it's too heavy?" He felt a familiar and painful whack from the blunt
end of Wyvern's spear. "Don't blame the sword. Desire victory and the sword will
move." She struck again and he moved to the side, not moving the sword so much as
standing it in the path of the attack. The parry was unorthodox but successful.
"That'll do. Now strike!"
* * *
Stoic tried to recall his training as the fight continued. It wasn't working. He was
bleeding profusely. He fell back on his reserves of strength and willpower. Slash,
cut, smash... the elf was striking every weak spot in his armor, inflicting damage at
will. Circle, stab, circle, slash, circle, cut. Stoic had been on the ground twice
before struggling to his feet, stumbling and throwing up defenses with little success.
He felt frustrated and clumsy but kept defending. Maybe the attacks were coming more
slowly...
* * *
The arena crowd was restless, only moderately attentive to the morning's rookie
warriors. The sand worked its way between his toes. He was just a boy. His parents did
not love their son so much as an arena bounty. Stoic was scared and slow and the man
in front of him wished him harm. And harm he did. Stoic cowered behind his shield,
without even a weapon. "It's better this way. Rely on your hands. I want to see what
you can do," memory had said. Stoic was bruised and bleeding. His opponent was more
tired than injured, exhausted, really. Under a slowly diminishing rain of blows, Stoic
heard calls from his teammates. "Now strike!" They were yelling frantically. He peered
over his shield to see his opponent, sweating, breathing heavily, grip loosening on
his sword. The attacking gladiator overextended above his head, ready to deliver
another hacking, unopposed blow. Stoic roared upward to his full height, at the same
time sending his shield through the surprised gladiator's face. Blood spattered, he
flipped once and landed face down with a thud, sword flying end over end to land ten
feet away. The crowd gasped for a moment then roared. His team roared. He looked to
see memory, gazing forward blindly as always, but clearly smiling at him.
* * *
Back in the night mist, he was tired and hurt. After a long fight, minutes under this
barrage. It must happen soon. Stoic knew he would die. But he wasn't dead yet. He saw
the elf circling, waiting for another attack. He saw the moonlight and the trees. He
felt the watching eyes. He felt memory and old Wyvern and his team. He knew they could
see. He felt his opponents and all the gladiators in him for this moment. He felt his
parents, who only saw in him a mouth to feed. He saw the high elf, still glistening,
now with sweat -- still looking down on Stoic -- looking down not with haughty
indignation as before, but the desperation of a man trying to chop down a stone tower
and just realizing his error. Stoic saw not confidence but desperation. For the first
time, resignation gave way to fury. "Strike Now," he heard in his mind.
The elf leapt forward, blade flashing. Stoic spun to his right, pulling the massive
blade in his wake. The elf and his blade shot through the spot Stoic had been, then
turned back in disbelief at the unexpected life in his easy quarry. "Strike Now,"
Stoic thought, as he continued his spin, continued his fury, pulling the blade full
circle, letting out a roar that called all the judging eyes to witness.
The blade felt warm in his hand. He struggled to catch his breath. The arc of the
blade had pulled him another half circle away from his opponent. He looked back at the
elf, ready for the next attack. The elf's body stood, head lying on its shoulder, neck
detached entirely where the blade had hewn through. The head's eyes were still open,
judging differently now, askew. Immortal these Dark Arena champions were, and
immortality makes death an odd thing. Stoic fell to his knees, sobbing. The fight was
over. And it might never end.
-- memory
REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER
Hello there!
We saw thirteen fights, two from challenges, no deaths, and a new Champion of the Horn
today.
DERAFF (35-4777) (30-35-2,195) of HOUSE JHEREG challenged HARD KNOCKS (42-4555) (72-
60-0,196) of COLOR ME SUAVE. DERAFF was devastated by HARD KNOCKS in a 1 minute
mismatched Challenge fight. Hard Knocks is the top Aimed Blow in Chrysalis.
MANAGING UP (32-6819) (20-20-0,88) of CON + INSULT challenged MR RIGHT HANDED (72-
6876) (44-73-2,100) of BASH BROS TIRES. MANAGING UP handily defeated MR RIGHT HANDED
in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge match. Mr Right Handed is, as usual, this arena's
leading (and only) Parry-Strike.
MOD COD (55-2638) (328-205-5,260) of RHYME TYME fought SYE THE BEARDED (81-801) (53-
68-3,215) of BIG LAKE OUTCASTS. MOD COD was vanquished by SYE THE BEARDED in a 1
minute mismatched Title brawl. So the Bearded one, in addition to being top Striker,
is now the Champion of the Horn. Mod Cod is the overall popularity leader.
CHATROOMMATE (18-10034) (83-56-0,224) of CENTER FOR OLDS fought BURM WOLFSNARL (81-
113) (68-58-0,205) of BIG LAKE OUTCASTS. CHATROOMMATE overpowered BURM WOLFSNARL in a
crowd pleasing 3 minute one-sided fight. The Roommate is top Parry-Lungeand this
turn's favorite while Mr. Wolfsnarl is our leading Total Parry.
JEDI YETI (18-10860) (36-35-2,184) of CENTER FOR OLDS fought QUICK (81-2926) (36-31-
2,164) of BIG LAKE SOLUTION. JEDI YETI lost to QUICK in a crowd pleasing 1 minute
fight. Quick is top Parry-Riposte.
BALDING GRAY (42-5022) (31-41-0,189) of COLOR ME SUAVE fought GOJIRO (107-31) (0-0-
0,220). BALDING GRAY was overpowered by GOJIRO in a popular 1 minute mismatched
brawl.
TANTRUM YOGA (42-4563) (74-59-3,210) of COLOR ME SUAVE fought RIRORNI COOK (107-24)
(0-0-0,181). TANTRUM YOGA handily defeated RIRORNI COOK in an action packed 1 minute
uneven melee. A Rirorni cook is one of our stand-ins? Weird.
DIRTY DIAPERS (38-5071) (71-85-2,201) of BASH BROS CHILDREN fought THE LEPER'S HAND
(81-2940) (43-23-0,167) of BIG LAKE SOLUTION. DIRTY DIAPERS was savagely defeated by
THE LEPER'S HAND in a 2 minute duel. Mr. Diapers is top Basher, same as last turn.
INIGO MONTOYA (33-8054) (59-63-3,198) of BIG LAKE BANDITS fought RAYNER (20-182) (48-
66-3,170) of DEADLINE. INIGO MONTOYA overpowered RAYNER in a popular 2 minute gory
uneven match. Of course, Montoya is top Slasher, and this is how Rayner lost his top
P-R title.
RESTRAINED CONTEMPT (28-5472) (46-41-2,177) of BIG LAKE PURE fought BARNABUS CROW (20-
501) (30-32-3,168) of I'M NOT EGGBERT. RESTRAINED CONTEMPT was demolished by BARNABUS
CROW in a 2 minute mismatched match. Mr. Contempt is our top, and I believe our only,
Wall of Steel.
SIMPLY AMAZING (28-5693) (17-24-2,56) of BIG LAKE PURE fought MR. BRATWURST (42-5106)
(24-16-0,59) of COLOR ME SUAVE. SIMPLY AMAZING was devastated by MR. BRATWURST in a 1
minute one-sided battle.
FLAT (72-6880) (33-19-2,73) of BASH BROS TIRES fought R.O.U.S. (107-4) (0-0-0,50).
FLAT bested R.O.U.S. in a 3 minute bout.
I'M POWERLESS (59-2629) (56-108-1,59) of BASHAHOLICS ANON fought $5 PROMINATOR (42-
5107) (22-15-0,63) of COLOR ME SUAVE. I'M POWERLESS handily defeated $5 PROMINATOR in
a 1 minute one-sided conflict. Oh shoot, the Prominator is still the least popular
fighter here.
I tried some katas yesterday and immediately pulled a hamstring. I'm not ready to get
old yet, so I've signed up for a stretching class. Wish me luck!
Sooo... that's all I can tell you today. See you in fourteen!
-- Olaf Modeen
CHAMPION OF THE HORN W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
SYE THE BEARDED 81-801 54 68 3 287 BIG LAKE OUTCASTS (410) SHADOWSPIRE
GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
CHATROOMMATE 18-10034 84 56 0 242 CENTER FOR OLDS (364) TALCAMA
TANTRUM YOGA 42-4563 75 59 3 216 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) RODEKI
GRAND CHAMPIONS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
HARD KNOCKS 42-4555 73 60 0 207 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) RODEKI
INIGO MONTOYA 33-8054 60 63 3 204 BIG LAKE BANDITS (409) NIYTYOLE ISLAND
BURM WOLFSNARL 81-113 68 59 0 198 BIG LAKE OUTCASTS (410) SHADOWSPIRE
THE LEPER'S HAND 81-2940 44 23 0 192 BIG LAKE SOLUTION (439) SHADOWSPIRE
MOD COD 55-2638 328 206 5 190 RHYME TYME (385) KHALANI
DERAFF 35-4777 30 36 2 188 HOUSE JHEREG (426) MURSKA
BARNABUS CROW 20-501 31 32 3 187 I'M NOT EGGBERT (421) SEAM
DIRTY DIAPERS 38-5071 71 86 2 184 BASH BROS CHILDREN (407) CLIFFHOME
BALDING GRAY 42-5022 31 42 0 182 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) RODEKI
GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
QUICK 81-2926 37 31 2 180 BIG LAKE SOLUTION (439) SHADOWSPIRE
JEDI YETI 18-10860 36 36 2 171 CENTER FOR OLDS (364) TALCAMA
RAYNER 20-182 48 67 3 167 DEADLINE (432) SEAM
RESTRAINED CONTEMPT 28-5472 46 42 2 162 BIG LAKE PURE (437) MORYA
GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
MANAGING UP 32-6819 21 20 0 100 CON + INSULT (442) ARVAT
GRAND INITIATES W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
MR RIGHT HANDED 72-6876 44 74 2 84 BASH BROS TIRES (411) DRAGONHEAD
I'M POWERLESS 59-2629 57 108 1 75 BASHAHOLICS ANON (375) ILLIS
FLAT 72-6880 34 19 2 75 BASH BROS TIRES (411) DRAGONHEAD
MR. BRATWURST 42-5106 25 16 0 69 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) RODEKI
$5 PROMINATOR 42-5107 22 16 0 51 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) RODEKI
SIMPLY AMAZING 28-5693 17 25 2 49 BIG LAKE PURE (437) MORYA
'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.
THE DEAD W L K TEAM NAME SLAIN BY TURN
PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE
LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS
DERAFF was devastated by HARD KNOCKS in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge fight.
MANAGING UP handily defeated MR RIGHT HANDED in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge match.
MOD COD was vanquished by SYE THE BEARDED in a 1 minute mismatched Title brawl.
CHATROOMMATE overpowered BURM WOLFSNARL in a crowd pleasing 3 minute one-sided fight.
JEDI YETI lost to QUICK in a crowd pleasing 1 minute fight.
BALDING GRAY was overpowered by GOJIRO in a popular 1 minute mismatched brawl.
TANTRUM YOGA handily defeated RIRORNI COOK in a action packed 1 minute uneven melee.
DIRTY DIAPERS was savagely defeated by THE LEPER'S HAND in a 2 minute duel.
INIGO MONTOYA overpowered RAYNER in a popular 2 minute gory uneven match.
RESTRAINED CONTEMPT was demolished by BARNABUS CROW in a 2 minute mismatched match.
SIMPLY AMAZING was devastated by MR. BRATWURST in a 1 minute one-sided battle.
FLAT bested R.O.U.S. in a 3 minute bout.
I'M POWERLESS handily defeated $5 PROMINATOR in a 1 minute one-sided conflict.
BATTLE REPORT
MOST POPULAR RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS
|FIGHTING STYLE FIGHTS FIGHTING STYLE W - L - K PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK 5 SLASHING ATTACK 7 - 4 - 0 64 |
|PARRY-LUNGE 4 PARRY-STRIKE 6 - 4 - 1 60 |
|AIMED BLOW 3 LUNGING ATTACK 23 - 20 - 1 53 |
|BASHING ATTACK 3 TOTAL PARRY 8 - 7 - 0 53 |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE 2 BASHING ATTACK 16 - 14 - 1 53 |
|STRIKING ATTACK 2 PARRY-LUNGE 20 - 20 - 0 50 |
|SLASHING ATTACK 1 WALL OF STEEL 5 - 5 - 0 50 |
|PARRY-STRIKE 1 AIMED BLOW 15 - 15 - 0 50 |
|TOTAL PARRY 1 STRIKING ATTACK 9 - 11 - 0 45 |
|WALL OF STEEL 1 PARRY-RIPOSTE 4 - 16 - 0 20 |
Turn 220 was great if you Not so great if you used The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles: the fighting styles: top eleven warriors are:
SLASHING ATTACK 1 - 0 PARRY-STRIKE 0 - 1 3 LUNGING ATTACK
AIMED BLOW 2 - 1 TOTAL PARRY 0 - 1 2 STRIKING ATTACK
BASHING ATTACK 2 - 1 WALL OF STEEL 0 - 1 2 PARRY-LUNGE
LUNGING ATTACK 3 - 2 1 AIMED BLOW
PARRY-LUNGE 2 - 2 1 SLASHING ATTACK
PARRY-RIPOSTE 1 - 1 1 TOTAL PARRY
STRIKING ATTACK 1 - 1 1 BASHING ATTACK
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE
FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME
STRIKING ATTACK SYE THE BEARDED 81-801 54 68 3 287 BIG LAKE OUTCASTS (410)
PARRY-LUNGE CHATROOMMATE 18-10034 84 56 0 242 CENTER FOR OLDS (364)
AIMED BLOW HARD KNOCKS 42-4555 73 60 0 207 COLOR ME SUAVE (365)
SLASHING ATTACK INIGO MONTOYA 33-8054 60 63 3 204 BIG LAKE BANDITS (409)
TOTAL PARRY BURM WOLFSNARL 81-113 68 59 0 198 BIG LAKE OUTCASTS (410)
LUNGING ATTACK THE LEPER'S HAND 81-2940 44 23 0 192 BIG LAKE SOLUTION (439)
BASHING ATTACK DIRTY DIAPERS 38-5071 71 86 2 184 BASH BROS CHILDREN (407)
PARRY-RIPOSTE QUICK 81-2926 37 31 2 180 BIG LAKE SOLUTION (439)
WALL OF STEEL RESTRAINED CONTEM 28-5472 46 42 2 162 BIG LAKE PURE (437)
PARRY-STRIKE MR RIGHT HANDED 72-6876 44 74 2 84 BASH BROS TIRES (411)
The overall popularity leader is MOD COD 55-2638. The most popular warrior this turn
was CHATROOMMATE 18-10034. The ten other most popular fighters were INIGO MONTOYA
33-8054, THE LEPER'S HAND 81-2940, HARD KNOCKS 42-4555, DIRTY DIAPERS 38-5071,
BARNABUS CROW 20-501, BURM WOLFSNARL 81-113, TANTRUM YOGA 42-4563, MR. BRATWURST
42-5106, FLAT 72-6880, and MANAGING UP 32-6819.
The least popular fighter this week was $5 PROMINATOR 42-5107. The other ten least
popular fighters were SIMPLY AMAZING 28-5693, MR RIGHT HANDED 72-6876, DERAFF
35-4777, BALDING GRAY 42-5022, MOD COD 55-2638, I'M POWERLESS 59-2629, RESTRAINED
CONTEMPT 28-5472, RAYNER 20-182, QUICK 81-2926, and JEDI YETI 18-10860.
Arena (Number) W L K Arena (Number) W L K Arena (Number) W L K
TALCAMA(18) 1 1 0 NIYTYOLE ISLAND(33) 1 0 0 KHALANI(55) 0 1 0
SEAM(20) 1 1 0 MURSKA(35) 0 1 0 ILLIS(59) 1 0 0
MORYA(28) 0 2 0 CLIFFHOME(38) 0 1 0 DRAGONHEAD(72) 1 1 0
ARVAT(32) 1 0 0 RODEKI(42) 3 2 0 SHADOWSPIRE(81) 3 1 0
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA W L K PNTS TEAM NAME CITY
CHATROOMMATE 18-10034 84 56 0 242 CENTER FOR OLDS (364) TALCAMA
BARNABUS CROW 20-501 31 32 3 187 I'M NOT EGGBERT (421) SEAM
RESTRAINED CONTEMP 28-5472 46 42 2 162 BIG LAKE PURE (437) MORYA
MANAGING UP 32-6819 21 20 0 100 CON + INSULT (442) ARVAT
INIGO MONTOYA 33-8054 60 63 3 204 BIG LAKE BANDITS (409) NIYTYOLE ISLAND
DERAFF 35-4777 30 36 2 188 HOUSE JHEREG (426) MURSKA
DIRTY DIAPERS 38-5071 71 86 2 184 BASH BROS CHILDREN (407) CLIFFHOME
TANTRUM YOGA 42-4563 75 59 3 216 COLOR ME SUAVE (365) RODEKI
MOD COD 55-2638 328 206 5 190 RHYME TYME (385) KHALANI
I'M POWERLESS 59-2629 57 108 1 75 BASHAHOLICS ANON (375) ILLIS
MR RIGHT HANDED 72-6876 44 74 2 84 BASH BROS TIRES (411) DRAGONHEAD
SYE THE BEARDED 81-801 54 68 3 287 BIG LAKE OUTCASTS (410) SHADOWSPIRE